Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Trowa Complex ❯ Recovering, Finally ( Chapter 3 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Title: The Trowa Complex
Pairings: 1x3, mentioned possible 5x4
Warnings: There is a lemon, and if you don't wish to read it, you can just skip ahead to the end of it. I make it quite clear where it begins and ends.

The trip back to Quatre's mansion was completely silent after that, and Trowa was scared out of his wits the whole time. He trembled a little bit there, able to feel Heero's erection beneith him, whimpering now and then if Wing jolted and he was pressed against it a little more. Heero just grit his teeth and kept silent, unable to believe that his body wasn't listening to him like this. He hated the fact that he knew full well that it was tormenting Trowa to feel it against him after what Heero'd done.

The moment they'd landed, Heero got Trowa up and out of Wing, and Quatre was right there to help the traumatized boy into his room. A week later and he was walking around, but he didn't let the others know that he was paying for it in blood. His mind was wrapped in a shroud of dark thoughts, and his reactions to things were limited to a surprised grunt whenever someone snapped him back into reality, his eyes finally looking upward to whoever was talking to him still remaining glazed over in pain, physical, mental and emotional. He could always be seen inside his room at the window, staring off silently up at the blue skies.

"I'm worried about him.." Quatre was always worried about Trowa, but now especially everyone understood why. "It's been over a week and he still hasn't said a word to anyone.. He's normally quiet, yes, but this is pushing it even for him. And he's barely eating or leaving his room.." The other pilots all just nodded, even Duo silent in the mutually morose mood that happened to come about as they talked about Trowa's mental state. Heero especially couldn't help but feel responsible for this. He had been supposed to watch over Trowa and instead he just listened as he'd been raped and then later on only further deepened the wounds that Trowa was feeling. And he found that he couldn't forgive himself for it.

Suddenly, Heero just got up and walked out of their little 'meeting of the minds,' heading into the yard out back, sitting down on the grass far from the house and staring at it, plucking out blades of the grass he was sitting upon. He wasn't sulking, he told himself, he was just reflecting on the less pleasant parts of his life and being upset about it. Naturally. He was unaware that the moment he'd gone outside, Trowa's attention snapped to him, half warily, and half curiously.

You can't fool me, Heero. You're upset. I can always tell when you're upset. His mind went back to the kiss in Wing and he grit his teeth, staring hard at the younger pilot out on the grass. Did you mean it? Are you really sorry about what you did? He sat down on the chair and watched Heero almost sadly, "I want so desperately to be with you Heero, but I don't know what you want.."

"Do you actually want to be with me? Or do you just want me?" Trowa put his face in his hands and rested his windows on the window sill, a sigh of frustration escaping his lips.

When Heero moved again to get up, Trowa looked immediately, noticing right away, and he saw Duo bound out towards Heero, hugging him and trying to give him a kiss. Heero turned his head away though and Trowa bit his lip. That was another thing, Heero and Duo had been in seperate beds every night, Heero hadn't even let Duo kiss him since. Trowa was having trouble crushing the feeling of hope he was starting to feel whenever he thought about that.

A few days later, there was a knock at Trowa's door. It was quiet, but not timid, and there were only two raps that were solid. Heero. Trowa had analysed all of their knocks and could tell who was at the door merely by that. Heero walked in after Trowa's soft response allowing him, and he closed the door afterward, his back to Trowa for the moment.

Heero slowly turned around and faced Trowa, who was sitting by the window, looking outside with his body only half turned to the window he was staring at. He could feel Heero's eyes on him and wondered what he was thinking, his gaze moving to meet the prussian-eyed boy's slowly.

"I want to make sure you know, I didn't mean to scare you like that. I am sorry..I just didn't know what else to do. I'm not..good at that sort of thing. Quatre is good at comforting people, Duo even. Not me. I'm..I'm so sorry Trowa.." Trowa heard the emotion in Heero's voice, knowing it was true, but he wasn't sure he could forget the fear he felt just then.

"I know.. Is that all, Heero?" He looked up at him, turning towards him, and saw the disappointment in his eyes even in the dim light. Slowly, Trowa stood up and walked towards Heero, curiosity on his face, "Why did you really come here, Heero?"

Looking surprised, Heero almost jumped at the question. He knew that he'd at least partially been found out, and he reached up, slowly so Trowa wouldn't be afraid, and brushed his bangs from his face, looking into his eyes, glancing only for a moment at the surprising piercing. "I wanted to be sure you forgave me. And..I wanted to know that things are still..alright between us." He cringed, hearing that from his own mouth, then shook his head and decided to show what he wanted in words instead, leaning forward ever so slowly and gently pressing his lips to the taller pilot's. After a moment he pulled away, his eyes questioning.

Trowa couldn't believe what Heero had just done, his eyes showing his surprise and shock, but there was no fear there just then, "W-..why?" Heero just smiled and shook his head, indicating he didn't understand it either, and leaning forward once more to kiss him, just as gently, with Trowa kissing him back this time. Heero broke the kiss again after a time and then pulled him close, holding him gently.

"I will never hurt you again, Trowa. Never."

The next few weeks, the rest of Trowa's recovery, things seemed so much more..normal. As normal as things get in a household like that one. Things even seemed homey, with Heero and Trowa almost always found next to one another, and Quatre constantly watched by Wufei, though the blonde was completely, almost adorably naive to it.

Everything seemed perfect - until Heero and Trowa's laptops let out their insistant beeps, indicating another mission. Trowa got to his first and checked the mission, then went pale, his eyes widening slightly and his hands beginning to tremble. Heero quickly moved to his side and growled at the mission; the same as the last time, the same as the very mission that got Trowa attacked. The exact same mission schematics, since the security had gone more lax now after no further attacks, and after what had happened to Trowa. They didn't think they would be back. This time, the information was completely up-to-date, and they were going to get daily updates still.

Heero put his hands gently on Trowa's shoulders, squeezing slightly to show that he was there and would help him and try to keep him safe. Their relationship had blossomed emotionally, though they'd never physically been together as much as either might want to. They knew that Trowa feared it, even as much as he might want to keep it hidden.

"We'll make it through this. I'll be there with you, it's okay.." He tried hard to keep his own hands from trembling, knowing how hard this would be for Trowa. The worst part of it all was that they were leaving for it the very next day.

Trowa turned his chair around and looked up at Heero, looking slightly afraid, though more decided suddenly as he stood up and kissed Heero softly. "Heero, I...I want us to..to be together now. Tonight, before anything else happens that will..hurt us." The look on his face showed that he wasn't going to let fear or his memories stop him just then.

Heero slowly nodded and they kissed once again, Heero's arms wrapping around Trowa's waist as he brought him towards the bed, leading him there slowly. Trowa's hands rested at first on Heero's shoulders, then moved down his chest slowly to rest at the hem of his shirt, sliding under it and running against the hard muscle underneith for just a moment before Heero moved him to lay down on the bed and obeying Trowa's hand, which had been tugging on his shirt, and lifting off his shirt.

Heero layed down next to Trowa, half hovering over him as he began kissing him again, his hand sliding Trowa's thin t-shirt up his own washboard muscles to his nipple, surprised to find it pierced as he flicked it, settling for twisting the silver hoop and relishing in Trowa's groans. He and Trowa had been close emotionally, though physically they hadn't gone further than chast kisses for the sake of Trowa's mental state. Which is why Heero was also surprised to find that his lover's tongue was pierced, though he found he thoroughly loved the sensation of the metal ball along his tongue in the sensual feeling of their tongues twined together.

Trowa's own hands were busy exploring every inch of Heero's upper body and he was delighted to find that Heero's nipples were even more sensitive than his own, and he promptly took advantage of that. Within moments, Heero was practically mewling there against him and panting, his pants visibly straining against his erection. Slowly, he moved one hand down to Heero's pants, stroking him over them for a moment before slowly beginning to release him from them.

While Heero's pants were being removed, Heero broke the kiss and stared into emerald orbs as he lifted his shirt slowly. Trowa reliquished his hold on the younger one's pants and let him take off his shirt, then simply shivered at the heated gaze he was getting. It was so different from Cain's; it was loving as well as wanting. It wasn't pure lust, and it comforted him greatly, and he tilted his head back with a groan as Heero leaned down and began to thoroughly mark his neck, biting and sucking until there were dark marks covering him. He barely noticed when Heero divested him of his clothing, or that Heero's clothing mysteriously disappeared as well.

When the prussian-eyed pilot pulled back, Trowa could only gasp and moan as his hand enclosed his erection, and his hips involuntarily bucked upward for more friction. Heero's mouth gradually began to move down his chest, licking at his nipples and biting them, flicking the lone hoop. His mouth roamed over Trowa's body, dipping into his bellybutton, which he noticed beforehand was pierced as well, and moving down further still. Trowa gasped, then whimpered when Heero past by where he desperately wanted him with nothing but the feel of hot breath against him.

Heero was slowly and teasingly kissing along his inner thighs for just long enough for Trowa to let out a whining 'please', then he moved back to his aching need and started to lick and kiss along it slowly. This only brought more whimpers at the teasing touching until Heero finally wrapped his lips around him, his back arching slightly as he moaned loudly suddenly. Heero got lube that he kept in the drawer next to the bed and started to apply it to Trowa slowly, making sure not to be painfully intrusive and, the moment Trowa realized and tensed, Heero half-flicked his finger inside of him, and Trowa could only gasp and clench the bedsheets as he saw fireworks.

Heero grinned a bit as he continued his oral ministrations and stretched Trowa slowly to ready him. He could only moan at the sight of Trowa, minutes later, as he came in his mouth, his back arching and his eyes snapping open, clouded over with lust and pleasure. Heero then slowly moved up, his fingers still moving inside Trowa slowly as he kissed the man softly. He looked into his eyes after a moment, questioning him silently to be sure he was completely ready for this. Trowa locked eyes with Heero and nodded, though he looked a bit wary as Heero's fingers left him and brought up his legs, his ankles hooked over Heero's shoulders.

Heero's hand then reached down and he slowly thrust inside of Trowa, groaning at the heat and the tightness around him. He kissed him softly and gently, waiting for Trowa to relax again before he started moving in slow, gentle thrusts. He sped up slowly as he felt Trowa moaning against his lips, one hand propping himself up on the bed and his other on Trowa's hardening cock. He kissed him more passionately once he felt Trowa tightening from the pleasure he was feeling.

Trowa had one hand in Heero's already tousled hair, the other hand on his back with his short nails digging in to the skin there. He just groaned and moaned at the feeling of Heero inside of him and moved his lips to the side of Heero's neck, marking him as equally as he had been marked now.

It didn't take too long before the combined feeling of Heero moving his hand over his erection in time to thrusting inside of him, and Trowa came once again, moaning loudly and arching his back, his body tensing as his hand on Heero's shoulder drew faint specks of blood. The feeling of Trowa tightening around him caused Heero to lose it as well and he thrust a few more times into him, hard, before he orgasmed as well. Heero just collapsed against his love and gasped, panting for breath as Trowa did.

Heero tilted Trowa's cheek so he would look at him, a soft smile on his face as he murmured words that neither had dared to say yet, "I love you, Trowa.." Trowa merely smiled and nuzzled into the hand on his cheek.

"I love you too, Heero.."

A/N: And that's chapter three! Hope you enjoyed, please review. I think I'm finally getting an idea where my muse is taking this so that's a good thing at least. And this time it took considerably less time to do it too! Yay!!