Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Torture or Salvation ❯ Confrontations ( Chapter 5 )

Chapter 4: Confrontations

She wasn't alone. Relena stiffened in her over comfortable bed or so she called it. She wasn't used to such comfort and for the first two nights she had slept on the floor. So when they had finally managed to get her to sleep on the bed it took a further day till she would willingly sleep in the covers.

She could remember when she took this kind of thing for granted. Relena recalled all the times she would bury herself deep within the blankets, making some sort of cocoon. It was like falling into a sea of comfort and security.

However, now, she felt out of place and uncomfortable about it. It was a stupid thing she knew but the past 3 months, whether she liked it or not, had changed her a great deal.

She heard the creek of the floorboards underneath a careless foot. She was thrown back from her musings. Relena slowly and carefully moved a hand to under her pillow and cursed in her head. It was gone. She had kept a knife under her pillow just to be safe. But they, no correction, HE, had taken it away. In a way she couldn't blame them, she had nearly killed one of her maids with it when the girl crept up on her to wake her up. She couldn't help it. It was driven into her mind that she sub-consciously picked up things to use as potential weapons. It was normal for her now. Old habits died hard she guessed.

She felt the covers on the `bed' move slightly. Thoughts raced through her head. It couldn't be a maid. After the knife incident the maids just called to her from the door. She never slept long anyway and always heard them. She relaxed her body knowing that she would get a quicker reaction than if she were all tensed up. 1…2…3…she lunged forward and threw her body weight on top of the assailant. Her hands went instinctively towards the throat and stopped suddenly. Her eyes grew wide in realisation at who she was on top of…Quatre.

She jumped off him as if she had been burnt. Her mouth opened in a big O shape, her eyes as wide as Quatre's.

"I I I I'm…" she tried to speak but trailed off, totally lost for words. She had nearly killed Quatre.

He had lost. Damn why did he have to pick the short straw? Not that he minded waking Relena up but he had heard about the maid incident and had grown fond of his `holeless' body. Quatre had arrived back from an important conference discussing Relena's state of mind. Those cold bastards all they could think of was whether she could still maintain the peace, not the fact that she had been tortured or nearly killed. He had had to keep a straight face but inside he was seething and was, to an extent, envisioning their deaths by his hands.

His cheeks started to flush with anger as he walked up the stairs to Relena's room. When he reached it he slowly opened the door. He looked into the room that was starting to fill with the morning's light. His gaze fell upon the small huddled form of Relena. She was in the foetal position, her face turned away from the light. Her hair, now coming down to her ankles was fanned out behind her. It caught the light and shimmered, looking like the bronze wings that you found in many artists' pictures of angels. He was starting to be grateful for the short straw.

He slowly walked to her bed to wake her. He neared it and nearly had a heart attack when the floor emitted a creaking sound. He looked up to see if she had heard it. She hadn't stirred. He continued on his trek to her bed. He leaned over and touched the covers slightly with his knees. That was his undoing, as he watched in what seemed to be slow motion. The body beneath him moved up as a sea of gold blinded him. He felt two hands on his chest forcing him down while the body sat on him so he couldn't get away. He felt their hands rising to his neck and he was paralysed by the shock to stop them. The hands stopped in their deadly journey as he looked up into a pair of wide blue eyes. Before he knew it the weight was off him as Relena got away off the bed to the other side of the room.

"I I I I'm…" she tried to speak but trailed off, totally lost for words.

"I'm sorry" she choked out. She watched as Quatre slowly got up from her bed and walked to the door. He didn't look at her once, too shaken up she presumed. He turned to look over his shoulder regarding her with sad eyes.

"Get ready, your first psychiatrist appointment starts in the study in half an hour." He said before disappearing. Relena was left to stand there staring in to space.

She knew that the Doctor was in there. She spat the word Doctor out in her mind and shuddered at the thought. She had been pacing out side the study for 10 minutes and was well aware of her audience. Everyone accept Heero was watching her every move intently as if waiting for her to go mad. Oh wait they thought she was already mad. She scoffed at the thought and paced even faster. Should I go in? Shouldn't I go in? Should I go in? Shouldn't I go in? Should I go in? Shouldn't I go in? Should I go in? Shouldn't I go in? Arrg this was driving her crazy. She reached out to the evil doorknob and swung the door open with unnecessary force.

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The music room was filled with the heavy beat as Relena danced around the room swinging her head totally forgetting about balls and politicians. The track changed to a more depressing song as Relena sang to it with all her heart and soul. She was off key a lot seeing as the lead singer's voice was so low but to her, that wasn't the point.

// I can't be here anymore,

Because I want my lifelong dream,

You've made it all for me I'm sure,

But moving on is my redeem,//

//It's never happened to me before,

I hope you feel the same way too,

I can't do this anymore,

It's such a shame I'm nothing,//

//This is the way we play,

When we want to speak

but we're hating something else,//

//This is the way I live,

Even though it causes me to choke,

You are the drug I take

when I haven't got any others on the floor,//

//This is the way I love,

And I'm just a drunken body with no sores,//

//This is all my fault,

I can't be here any more,

I don't want to cry,//

//Sucking out the poison when

you know that it is good for you,

Now I've changed, the page has turned,

And that was never meant to be,//

//I'm out of place, my heart still burns,

But not for your bad memories,

Peeling leeches off my heart,

//It's getting colder in this flesh,

I can't sing this anymore,

Celestial skies have faded,

Let's all kill ourselves again…//

She sang the last note until her throat hurt. She felt her voice as it ripped at the back of her throat, causing her voice to break. But she didn't care she needed that.

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