Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ voodoo kiss ❯ voodoo kiss 7/? ( Chapter 7 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: holyfalling 
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama / Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.15.2008 | Pages: 2 | Words: 3.0K | Visits: 260 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama / Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.15.2008 | Pages: 2 | Words: 3.0K | Visits: 260 | Status: Work In Progress
title:: voodoo kiss 7/?
author:: Psyence
rating:: NC-17
pairings:: 1x2, 3x4, mentions of 2x5
disclaimer:: go on, sue me. I dare you.
summary:: in which Heero is socio-phobic, Duo is annoyingly persistent, Quatre meddles, Trowa helps, Wufei hinders and Relena gets in the way.
warnings:: yaoi, AU, strong language, lemons, humour, strange plot, major UST.
###
The next day Heero woke up hyperventilating.
He lay in bed for a while, staring at the ceiling and trying, in vain, to control his erratic breathing. He closed his eyes and tried to calm down, but images of his date with Duo that evening simply flashed through his mind. He saw himself getting the street name wrong (he quickly repeated Duo's address to himself as if it were his mantra), or arriving at the wrong time and having Duo knee him in the crotch again, or - and this was the worst image - he saw himself breezing through the date itself, getting on with Duo like a house on fire, and then when it came to going back to Duo's he would royally put his foot in it somehow. For example, what if he froze up at the crucial moment? What if Heero couldn't perform? What if Duo was expecting Heero to be brain freezingly magical in bed, when Heero thought he wasn't even close to being adequate! And, to top everything off, Heero had never even been with a man before! He knew the mimimal basics of what went where and how everything worked. Heero hardly knew anything about his own body, let alone another man's.
It was safe to say that Heero was terrified.
###
Heero had just stepped out of the shower, still breathing slightly heavily, when there was a knock on his door. His mind immediately jumped to the conclusion that it was Duo and that he had come to Heero's house to cancel their date and tell him that he would never, even in a million years and if they were the only living beings on Earth want to date him. Then rationality kicked in when he realised that just calling to tell Heero would be a lot easier. Besides, Duo didn't know where Heero lived. With this depressing thought weighing on his mind he went to the door and answered it, even though he was only wearing a towel, knowing that it would only be Quatre or Trowa.
It turned out to be Relena.
Heero didn't realize this initially because he had simply walked to the door, opened it and then walked to the kitchen without checking who it was first. When he didn't hear any noise from his, other than a faint gurgling sound, he turned to see what was wrong. He was halfway towards the kitchen when he turned.
Relena's expression was one of intense, unbelieving joy at seeing Heero in a towel. She wore an open mouthed grin, and her eyes were almost popping out of her head. She was scanning her eyes up and down Heero's body, but they screeched to a halt once he had turned, since she could clearly see the bump in the smooth surface of the towel, caused by Heero's 'package'. She was practically drooling.
Heero, on the other hand, was quaking. He almost lost his towel (much to Relena's glee. She let out a slight squeal as it slipped down and revealed half a buttock to her) as he dived into the kitchen and slammed the door shut, reliving the events of the previous day. He plastered himself against the door, as if to keep it firmly shut against Relena. He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed that she would leave. He counted the seconds in his mind, believing that if he didn't hear anything for five whole minutes it would be safe to assume she had left. He then topped it up to half an hour, and then decided that he would stay in there all day and wait for Quatre or Trowa (or Duo, his mind thought depressingly) to call or visit before leaving the safety of his kitchen. But then, just as he had decided this, Relena knocked on the kitchen door, and he really did loose his towel then. He scrambled to retrieve it, convinced that even though there was a solid piece of wood between them she would somehow manage to see him sans towel.
"Heero?" Relena called sweetly. "Why are you in there? Are you making something to eat? Are we going to have lunch? Shouldn't you get dressed first?" Relena giggled girlishly and, when Heero didn't reply (he was busy swallowing his tongue from shock and fear) she knocked again. She waited a second and then knocked once more. "Heero, I'm coming in!" she said through the door.
"No!" Heero wailed, pressing his back against the door so hard the paneled wood dug into his shoulder blades. "I-I'm coming out! In a second!" Heero amended, trying to cover up his frightened wail.
"Okay," Relena giggled happily. Heero heard her step away from the door and heard her heels clack against the wood floor as she walked further into the living room, and away from the kitchen. Heero jumped away from the door, quickly grabbed a mug off of the counter that had the remnants of coffee in it still from the day before and steeled himself before opening the door.
"Hi," he tried to say casually. "I was just getting myself a drink, you know." Relena rose one eyebrow at Heero, an amused look on her face, so Heero looked down at the mug and then downed the cold coffee for good measure. He grimaced and noticed that she looked a bit more convinced after his show of drinking. But she wasn't concerned about his poor excuse for very long, because soon she noticed his body again. Heero gripped the mug with both hands and shook.
"I'm going to - I need some clothes," Heero almost sounded like he was pleading with her to let him go.
"Oh no, it's alright, I don't mind," Relena reassured him, all the while checking out his bulge. Heero lowered the mug to cover his crotch and gulped. Silence reigned for a few moments while Relena drooled.
"Anyway," she eventually said, tearing her eyes away from Heero's crotch. "I just came by to say hello." Her giggle emerged again, grating on Heero's nerves.
"Hello," Heero said, naively thinking that she would actually leave after he had said it. She smiled at him and turned on her heel, giving Heero a burst of hope, but she just sat down on Heero's sofa and looked over her shoulder at him, waiting for him to join her.
"Come sit down next to me," she said. He heard her pat the seat next to her. Heero actually took a step backwards.
"I'll stand."
"Oh, don't be silly," Relena scoffed. "Come and sit next to me." She ordered him that time, and when Heero didn't move she turned fully in her seat and glared at him. So as not to tempt fate he reluctantly stepped forward, moving one hand to his waist to get a firm grip on his towel. Heero sat down on the opposite side of the sofa, but Relena just scooched closer. A lot closer. Her stocking-clad leg was pressed against Heero's, and when she placed one hand on her knee her little finger managed to make its way over to Heero's knee. It just sat there, on Heero's skin, frightening the life out of him.
"Heero," Relena said eventually. "I don't think we got off on the right foot." She said it as if it were fact. As if simply by saying it Heero would scoop her up and marry her on the spot, but when he didn't even move a muscle Relena looked up at him and frowned.
"Don't you think so too?" she asked. Heero was sure she was fluttering her eyelashes at him. She was definitely doing a poor attempt at puppy dog eyes. Heero looked away from the ghastly sight and fidgeted.
"Er-" he began, but then Relena grabbed his hand while grinning manically.
"Fantastic!" she exclaimed. She edged even closer to him, leaning forwards and staring into Heero's eyes intently. Heero, meanwhile, was sweating visibly and almost shaking with fear.
"Oh, Heero, you're so perfect," she praised, sighing girlily and squeezing Heero's hand. Heero gulped and prepared to jump up and away from her advancing lips, but he didn't need to because Relena stopped short suddenly.
"No," she said quietly, seemingly to herself. She closed her eyes momentarily and sighed. "Not yet, good girls don't put out until after the third date." Heero let out a slightly bemused and nervous laugh, making Relena open her eyes again. She smiled at Heero and lunged at him. Heero tried to leap out of his seat, but he was stuck between the back of the couch and Relena's body. He feared for his life for a few seconds, thinking that Relena was kissing him, but then he realised that she was only kissing him on the cheek. She held herself there for far too long though, and only pulled away when Heero began to hyperventilate in earnest. She giggled as she leant away and covered her mouth with one long-nailed hand.
"I'm really looking forward to seeing you again," she said. "This is my number." She pulled a rectangle shaped piece of paper out of her bag and placed it on the table. Heero realised that she had pre-made it. "Call me."
And with that Relena stood up, gave Heero a strange curtsey-esque movement and let herself out, but not before turning to give the apartment one long, longing glance, as if wishing for the day it would be her apartment also.
As soon as the door closed behind her, Heero sank into the sofa and began to sob tearlessly.
###
Heero had not even begun to recover from Relena's visit and subsequent semi-molestation - Heero had decided that, since he had not wanted to allow the kiss on the cheek, he had therefore been assaulted - when there was another knock on his door. An hour had passed since Relena had left, and he wouldn't have put it past her at all to return to torment him some more, so was very wary. He decided to ignore his knocking visitor. Except, his visitor refused to be ignored.
After five minutes of prolonged knocking Heero couldn't stand it anymore. He knew, almost certainly, that it was Quatre on the other side of the door, but after his earlier mistake he wasn't about to take any chances. He went over to the door and, because he didn't have a peep hole, shouted through the door.
"Who is it?" he shouted.
"What do you mean 'who is it?'" Quatre answered frustratedly. "Let me in, for goodness sake!"
Heero allowed himself one moment of self pity before opening the door and resignedly stepping aside. Quatre wasted no time in getting inside the apartment. He was carrying two large shopping bags from 'Quality Menswear for Grooms To Be', and he set them down heavily on the floor before settling himself into the couch. Once he was done, he turned to Heero, a sweet smile on his lips, and said, "Tea would be nice," as if Heero had offered. Heero just sighed and went through to the kitchen and put the kettle on.
Once Heero had made Quatre's tea, he went back into the living room and sat beside Quatre on the couch. He eyed the bags suspiciously, wondering what could be in them. He was about to ask when Quatre set his tea down on the coffee table and turned to him.
"Right," he said. Heero was already worried. "A little bird told me that you have a new love interest."
Heero's eyes widened tellingly and he automatically shook his head, immediately imagining Trowa's head on a platter. Quatre gave him a 'don't be so silly' sort of look and shook his head back.
"Heero, there's no need to be embarrassed. We all get those sorts of feelings sometimes," Quatre said. Heero cringed inwardly, suddenly expecting a lecture on the birds and bees à la Quatre.
"Quatre ..." Heero warned.
"Now, I don't know /all/ the details, but I do know that it just isn't going to work," Quatre said matter-of-factly. Heero stared at him for a second.
"Excuse me?" he asked. He had expected Quatre to be pleased, but instead he was rejecting Heero's first 'love interest' in years!
"Heero, honestly. You can't just go off and look for someone else when I've worked so hard all these years to find you someone, and now that I have you run off with this Duo person! That really isn't on now, is it?" Quatre tutted and pursed his lips. Heero was doing his best fish out of water impression.
"What!?" he finally gasped. "I haven't - Relena isn't - what?!" He was completely exasperated by Quatre.
"Please, at least just /try/, Heero. If you'd just told me to begin with that it was a /man/ that you wanted, I could have found you one! But no, you wanted a woman, so I got you one."
"I didn't want anyone!" Heero burst out.
"Stop talking nonsense. Of course you wanted someone, you were just too shy to admit it," Quatre bustled. He pulled one of the large bags towards himself and stuck a hand in it. "Now, I think I know why Relena and you haven't hit it off yet. See, Relena's a very classy woman, and you're ... not very classy." He surveyed Heero with a critical eye and shook his head of emphasis. Heero frowned slightly and crossed his arms over his chest, suddenly self-conscious, meanwhile remembering Relena's glittering turquoise dress that he had seen her in on their first and only date. He hadn't thought she was very classy then, but Heero was the first to admit that he had no clue what made a woman classy.
Heero's attention was pulled away from contemplating Relena's dress sense when Quatre pulled a dark blue suit jacket out of the bag.
"Ta-da~!" Quatre lay the jacket over his lap and smoothed out the few creases that had appeared in the material. "You see? If you wear this when you see her next, everything will be fine!" Quatre grinned, obviously pleased with his solution.
"What?" Heero asked again, completely baffled by Quatre's skewed logic. It seemed that in his mind the idea that Heero might not be suited to Relena was nonexistant. "I'm not seeing her again - she's insane," Heero added, remembering her assault earlier that day, which seemed like a distant nightmare now.
"Yes you are," Quatre answered, pulling a pair of matching trousers out of the bag. "And no she isn't. Relena is a lovely girl. I mean, I don't really know her personally, but Milliardo says that she's a got a very lively spirit." It sounded like something Milliardo would say. He was very flowery with his language sometimes.
"She came here today. She molested me!" Heero cried, shuddered as he recalled her close proximity. Quatre stopped what he was doing as soon as the words had left Heero's mouth.
"That's fantastic Heero! See, you're already getting on better." Quatre was almost visibly patting himself on the back for what he thought were his perfect matchmaking skills. He had obviously decided to ignore Heero's molestation though. Heero himself was spluttering indignantly, because of Quatre's complete disregard for Heero's wishes.
"Okay, now, all we have to do is get you well dressed and presentable." Quatre eyed Heero's unruly hair. "What time is it?" Quatre asked distractedly, checking his watch. "Okay, we've got about an hour yet." Heero's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"Until what?" he asked, dreading Quatre's answer.
"Oh, nothing," Quatre said, laughing nervously.
Heero's heart sank. He knew that Quatre had planned something horrific and cruel, but all Heero could do was sit there and wait for it. No amount of complaining would stop Quatre when he wanted to do something. Heero could only hope that is wouldn't take too long, since he was supposed to pick Duo up in three hours. The reminder made Heero's stomach churn.
"Heero, are you alright? You look a little pale," Quatre asked concernedly. Heero swallowed hard and shook his head.
"I'm fine," he answered hoarsely. His throat was suddenly painfully dry.
"Great. Okay, I bought two different suits that you can choose from. Shall we get started?" Quatre rubbed his hands together and didn't wait for Heero's answer.
Heero felt sick.
author:: Psyence
rating:: NC-17
pairings:: 1x2, 3x4, mentions of 2x5
disclaimer:: go on, sue me. I dare you.
summary:: in which Heero is socio-phobic, Duo is annoyingly persistent, Quatre meddles, Trowa helps, Wufei hinders and Relena gets in the way.
warnings:: yaoi, AU, strong language, lemons, humour, strange plot, major UST.
###
The next day Heero woke up hyperventilating.
He lay in bed for a while, staring at the ceiling and trying, in vain, to control his erratic breathing. He closed his eyes and tried to calm down, but images of his date with Duo that evening simply flashed through his mind. He saw himself getting the street name wrong (he quickly repeated Duo's address to himself as if it were his mantra), or arriving at the wrong time and having Duo knee him in the crotch again, or - and this was the worst image - he saw himself breezing through the date itself, getting on with Duo like a house on fire, and then when it came to going back to Duo's he would royally put his foot in it somehow. For example, what if he froze up at the crucial moment? What if Heero couldn't perform? What if Duo was expecting Heero to be brain freezingly magical in bed, when Heero thought he wasn't even close to being adequate! And, to top everything off, Heero had never even been with a man before! He knew the mimimal basics of what went where and how everything worked. Heero hardly knew anything about his own body, let alone another man's.
It was safe to say that Heero was terrified.
###
Heero had just stepped out of the shower, still breathing slightly heavily, when there was a knock on his door. His mind immediately jumped to the conclusion that it was Duo and that he had come to Heero's house to cancel their date and tell him that he would never, even in a million years and if they were the only living beings on Earth want to date him. Then rationality kicked in when he realised that just calling to tell Heero would be a lot easier. Besides, Duo didn't know where Heero lived. With this depressing thought weighing on his mind he went to the door and answered it, even though he was only wearing a towel, knowing that it would only be Quatre or Trowa.
It turned out to be Relena.
Heero didn't realize this initially because he had simply walked to the door, opened it and then walked to the kitchen without checking who it was first. When he didn't hear any noise from his, other than a faint gurgling sound, he turned to see what was wrong. He was halfway towards the kitchen when he turned.
Relena's expression was one of intense, unbelieving joy at seeing Heero in a towel. She wore an open mouthed grin, and her eyes were almost popping out of her head. She was scanning her eyes up and down Heero's body, but they screeched to a halt once he had turned, since she could clearly see the bump in the smooth surface of the towel, caused by Heero's 'package'. She was practically drooling.
Heero, on the other hand, was quaking. He almost lost his towel (much to Relena's glee. She let out a slight squeal as it slipped down and revealed half a buttock to her) as he dived into the kitchen and slammed the door shut, reliving the events of the previous day. He plastered himself against the door, as if to keep it firmly shut against Relena. He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed that she would leave. He counted the seconds in his mind, believing that if he didn't hear anything for five whole minutes it would be safe to assume she had left. He then topped it up to half an hour, and then decided that he would stay in there all day and wait for Quatre or Trowa (or Duo, his mind thought depressingly) to call or visit before leaving the safety of his kitchen. But then, just as he had decided this, Relena knocked on the kitchen door, and he really did loose his towel then. He scrambled to retrieve it, convinced that even though there was a solid piece of wood between them she would somehow manage to see him sans towel.
"Heero?" Relena called sweetly. "Why are you in there? Are you making something to eat? Are we going to have lunch? Shouldn't you get dressed first?" Relena giggled girlishly and, when Heero didn't reply (he was busy swallowing his tongue from shock and fear) she knocked again. She waited a second and then knocked once more. "Heero, I'm coming in!" she said through the door.
"No!" Heero wailed, pressing his back against the door so hard the paneled wood dug into his shoulder blades. "I-I'm coming out! In a second!" Heero amended, trying to cover up his frightened wail.
"Okay," Relena giggled happily. Heero heard her step away from the door and heard her heels clack against the wood floor as she walked further into the living room, and away from the kitchen. Heero jumped away from the door, quickly grabbed a mug off of the counter that had the remnants of coffee in it still from the day before and steeled himself before opening the door.
"Hi," he tried to say casually. "I was just getting myself a drink, you know." Relena rose one eyebrow at Heero, an amused look on her face, so Heero looked down at the mug and then downed the cold coffee for good measure. He grimaced and noticed that she looked a bit more convinced after his show of drinking. But she wasn't concerned about his poor excuse for very long, because soon she noticed his body again. Heero gripped the mug with both hands and shook.
"I'm going to - I need some clothes," Heero almost sounded like he was pleading with her to let him go.
"Oh no, it's alright, I don't mind," Relena reassured him, all the while checking out his bulge. Heero lowered the mug to cover his crotch and gulped. Silence reigned for a few moments while Relena drooled.
"Anyway," she eventually said, tearing her eyes away from Heero's crotch. "I just came by to say hello." Her giggle emerged again, grating on Heero's nerves.
"Hello," Heero said, naively thinking that she would actually leave after he had said it. She smiled at him and turned on her heel, giving Heero a burst of hope, but she just sat down on Heero's sofa and looked over her shoulder at him, waiting for him to join her.
"Come sit down next to me," she said. He heard her pat the seat next to her. Heero actually took a step backwards.
"I'll stand."
"Oh, don't be silly," Relena scoffed. "Come and sit next to me." She ordered him that time, and when Heero didn't move she turned fully in her seat and glared at him. So as not to tempt fate he reluctantly stepped forward, moving one hand to his waist to get a firm grip on his towel. Heero sat down on the opposite side of the sofa, but Relena just scooched closer. A lot closer. Her stocking-clad leg was pressed against Heero's, and when she placed one hand on her knee her little finger managed to make its way over to Heero's knee. It just sat there, on Heero's skin, frightening the life out of him.
"Heero," Relena said eventually. "I don't think we got off on the right foot." She said it as if it were fact. As if simply by saying it Heero would scoop her up and marry her on the spot, but when he didn't even move a muscle Relena looked up at him and frowned.
"Don't you think so too?" she asked. Heero was sure she was fluttering her eyelashes at him. She was definitely doing a poor attempt at puppy dog eyes. Heero looked away from the ghastly sight and fidgeted.
"Er-" he began, but then Relena grabbed his hand while grinning manically.
"Fantastic!" she exclaimed. She edged even closer to him, leaning forwards and staring into Heero's eyes intently. Heero, meanwhile, was sweating visibly and almost shaking with fear.
"Oh, Heero, you're so perfect," she praised, sighing girlily and squeezing Heero's hand. Heero gulped and prepared to jump up and away from her advancing lips, but he didn't need to because Relena stopped short suddenly.
"No," she said quietly, seemingly to herself. She closed her eyes momentarily and sighed. "Not yet, good girls don't put out until after the third date." Heero let out a slightly bemused and nervous laugh, making Relena open her eyes again. She smiled at Heero and lunged at him. Heero tried to leap out of his seat, but he was stuck between the back of the couch and Relena's body. He feared for his life for a few seconds, thinking that Relena was kissing him, but then he realised that she was only kissing him on the cheek. She held herself there for far too long though, and only pulled away when Heero began to hyperventilate in earnest. She giggled as she leant away and covered her mouth with one long-nailed hand.
"I'm really looking forward to seeing you again," she said. "This is my number." She pulled a rectangle shaped piece of paper out of her bag and placed it on the table. Heero realised that she had pre-made it. "Call me."
And with that Relena stood up, gave Heero a strange curtsey-esque movement and let herself out, but not before turning to give the apartment one long, longing glance, as if wishing for the day it would be her apartment also.
As soon as the door closed behind her, Heero sank into the sofa and began to sob tearlessly.
###
Heero had not even begun to recover from Relena's visit and subsequent semi-molestation - Heero had decided that, since he had not wanted to allow the kiss on the cheek, he had therefore been assaulted - when there was another knock on his door. An hour had passed since Relena had left, and he wouldn't have put it past her at all to return to torment him some more, so was very wary. He decided to ignore his knocking visitor. Except, his visitor refused to be ignored.
After five minutes of prolonged knocking Heero couldn't stand it anymore. He knew, almost certainly, that it was Quatre on the other side of the door, but after his earlier mistake he wasn't about to take any chances. He went over to the door and, because he didn't have a peep hole, shouted through the door.
"Who is it?" he shouted.
"What do you mean 'who is it?'" Quatre answered frustratedly. "Let me in, for goodness sake!"
Heero allowed himself one moment of self pity before opening the door and resignedly stepping aside. Quatre wasted no time in getting inside the apartment. He was carrying two large shopping bags from 'Quality Menswear for Grooms To Be', and he set them down heavily on the floor before settling himself into the couch. Once he was done, he turned to Heero, a sweet smile on his lips, and said, "Tea would be nice," as if Heero had offered. Heero just sighed and went through to the kitchen and put the kettle on.
Once Heero had made Quatre's tea, he went back into the living room and sat beside Quatre on the couch. He eyed the bags suspiciously, wondering what could be in them. He was about to ask when Quatre set his tea down on the coffee table and turned to him.
"Right," he said. Heero was already worried. "A little bird told me that you have a new love interest."
Heero's eyes widened tellingly and he automatically shook his head, immediately imagining Trowa's head on a platter. Quatre gave him a 'don't be so silly' sort of look and shook his head back.
"Heero, there's no need to be embarrassed. We all get those sorts of feelings sometimes," Quatre said. Heero cringed inwardly, suddenly expecting a lecture on the birds and bees à la Quatre.
"Quatre ..." Heero warned.
"Now, I don't know /all/ the details, but I do know that it just isn't going to work," Quatre said matter-of-factly. Heero stared at him for a second.
"Excuse me?" he asked. He had expected Quatre to be pleased, but instead he was rejecting Heero's first 'love interest' in years!
"Heero, honestly. You can't just go off and look for someone else when I've worked so hard all these years to find you someone, and now that I have you run off with this Duo person! That really isn't on now, is it?" Quatre tutted and pursed his lips. Heero was doing his best fish out of water impression.
"What!?" he finally gasped. "I haven't - Relena isn't - what?!" He was completely exasperated by Quatre.
"Please, at least just /try/, Heero. If you'd just told me to begin with that it was a /man/ that you wanted, I could have found you one! But no, you wanted a woman, so I got you one."
"I didn't want anyone!" Heero burst out.
"Stop talking nonsense. Of course you wanted someone, you were just too shy to admit it," Quatre bustled. He pulled one of the large bags towards himself and stuck a hand in it. "Now, I think I know why Relena and you haven't hit it off yet. See, Relena's a very classy woman, and you're ... not very classy." He surveyed Heero with a critical eye and shook his head of emphasis. Heero frowned slightly and crossed his arms over his chest, suddenly self-conscious, meanwhile remembering Relena's glittering turquoise dress that he had seen her in on their first and only date. He hadn't thought she was very classy then, but Heero was the first to admit that he had no clue what made a woman classy.
Heero's attention was pulled away from contemplating Relena's dress sense when Quatre pulled a dark blue suit jacket out of the bag.
"Ta-da~!" Quatre lay the jacket over his lap and smoothed out the few creases that had appeared in the material. "You see? If you wear this when you see her next, everything will be fine!" Quatre grinned, obviously pleased with his solution.
"What?" Heero asked again, completely baffled by Quatre's skewed logic. It seemed that in his mind the idea that Heero might not be suited to Relena was nonexistant. "I'm not seeing her again - she's insane," Heero added, remembering her assault earlier that day, which seemed like a distant nightmare now.
"Yes you are," Quatre answered, pulling a pair of matching trousers out of the bag. "And no she isn't. Relena is a lovely girl. I mean, I don't really know her personally, but Milliardo says that she's a got a very lively spirit." It sounded like something Milliardo would say. He was very flowery with his language sometimes.
"She came here today. She molested me!" Heero cried, shuddered as he recalled her close proximity. Quatre stopped what he was doing as soon as the words had left Heero's mouth.
"That's fantastic Heero! See, you're already getting on better." Quatre was almost visibly patting himself on the back for what he thought were his perfect matchmaking skills. He had obviously decided to ignore Heero's molestation though. Heero himself was spluttering indignantly, because of Quatre's complete disregard for Heero's wishes.
"Okay, now, all we have to do is get you well dressed and presentable." Quatre eyed Heero's unruly hair. "What time is it?" Quatre asked distractedly, checking his watch. "Okay, we've got about an hour yet." Heero's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"Until what?" he asked, dreading Quatre's answer.
"Oh, nothing," Quatre said, laughing nervously.
Heero's heart sank. He knew that Quatre had planned something horrific and cruel, but all Heero could do was sit there and wait for it. No amount of complaining would stop Quatre when he wanted to do something. Heero could only hope that is wouldn't take too long, since he was supposed to pick Duo up in three hours. The reminder made Heero's stomach churn.
"Heero, are you alright? You look a little pale," Quatre asked concernedly. Heero swallowed hard and shook his head.
"I'm fine," he answered hoarsely. His throat was suddenly painfully dry.
"Great. Okay, I bought two different suits that you can choose from. Shall we get started?" Quatre rubbed his hands together and didn't wait for Heero's answer.
Heero felt sick.