Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! ❯ Chapter 11

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter 11: Women Aren't So Weak Wufei!

*warning* this story is definitely going to contain some mature themes, thus the rating. They are not so much about sex or anything...well, they are about the female sex...and some, uh, things we have to deal with *cough*time of the month*cough*. There's also some profanity.

*disclaimer* I DO NOT OWN GUNDAM WING OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS!! Unfortunately...If I did, the series would not have ended where it did. It would be much longer and a lot more would have happened...



By Thursday, the gundam pilots turned women were extremely bored. Dorothy had stayed home with them on Wednesday, and they had done virtually nothing besides eating, lounging around, and watching movies. Much to Duo's disappointment, they had not been able to get Heero and Wufei to say anything about the date, besides what they had ordered at the restaurant and what movie they had seen. Eventually he had given up. Now Midii was staying home with them, and she was getting tired of all the guys complaining.

"Guys!" she finally snapped, catching everyone's attention. "Why don't you go to the gym and work out or something. You're driving me insane!"

"Is that possible?" Duo asked, his eyes wide with curiosity.

"Is what possible?" Midii replied.

"Working out...in our condition."

"In your...condition?" Midii thought about that for a second before realization hit her. "Oh, for crying out loud, Duo! It's JUST your damn period! It's no big deal!" Duo shrunk back.

"Just wondering," he said sheepishly.

"That's actually not a bad idea," Heero said, looking up from his game of chess with Trowa.

"Yeah, I feel like I've gained twenty pounds lately," added Trowa.

"God, I need to shave." Duo blinked and looked towards the couch, as did the other occupants in the room. Quatre, still rubbing a hand up his leg, looked up noticing the silence in the room. "Eh heh," he said, going a little pink. "I take it I said that out loud?"

"Yeah, you did," Duo replied, plopping down onto the couch next to him. He squinted at Quatre's leg. "Quat, the hair's coming in blonde. No one can tell." Quatre snorted.

"Well I can, and I feel all grungy." Duo propped his foot up on the coffee table along side Quatre's.

"Me too," he agreed, scrutinizing his leg. "I just realized how...how...bleh that looks."

"Bleh?"

"Yeah," Duo replied. "You know, nasty, disgusting, just...bleh." Quatre blinked.

"Okaaaay."

"And mine's coming in black! Eeewww," Duo said, making a face. Heero, Trowa, and Wufei watched this scene with disinterest.

"I can lend you my razor," Midii offered. "If it's really bothering you." Duo blinked, and then looked thoughtful.

"Ok! Quat, will you do it with me?" Duo said, looking at Quatre with puppy-dog eyes. Quatre sighed.

"Alright. It can't be too hard..."

"Just be careful, and don't press down too hard or you'll cut yourself," Midii said, heading towards the stairs and motioning for the two on the couch to follow her. They looked toward the other three.

"You gonna join us?" Duo asked. They shook their heads. Duo shrugged. "Ok, suit yourself."


* * *


Almost thirty minutes later, Dou and Quatre finally came back downstairs, pretty much unscathed from their experience with a razor. Glancing around the room once, Duo ran over and sat down next to Wufei.

"Hey, Wu-man, check it out!" Duo exclaimed excitedly, laying his leg across Wufei's lap. Wufei grimaced and pushed the offending appendage off. Duo replaced it promptly.

"What do you want Duo?" Wufei asked exasperatedly.

"Feel it!" Wufei raised an eyebrow.

"I am NOT feeling your leg, Duo."

"But it's all smooth now. Come on, see if you can tell the difference between your leg and mine."

"No," Wufei said turning back to the T.V. Duo rolled his eyes and, before Wufei could stop him, grabbed one of his hands and ran it down his leg. Wufei yanked his hand away from Duo, scowling.

"See, nice and smooth," Duo said, smiling triumphantly. "Unlike you three who are too scared to try shaving."

"Only women shave their legs, baka." Duo opened his mouth, but Wufei held up a hand to silence him. "Don't say it."

"Don't say what?"

"You know."

"What, that we ARE women?"

"Yes," Wufei said reluctantly, "that."

"Are you admitting it?"

"It's kind of hard not too," Wufei replied, glaring at Duo.

"So then you can shave, right?"

"I don't want to."

"It's not that difficult," Duo said, looking his legs over. "It just hurts like hell if you cut yourself. Well, actually, it only stings really bad, but it doesn't really hurt. And the blood just doesn't stop!" Duo rambled on.

"Ok, you know what?" Wufei said, standing up suddenly and knocking Duo's leg off him. "I'm gonna go to the gym like Midii suggested, ok?"

"And do what?" asked Heero. Wufei raised an eyebrow.

"Make some ice cream," he replied sarcastically. "What the hell do you think? I'm going to work out."

"I knew that, baka," Heero said, rolling his eyes. "I meant are you going to lift weights, go running?"

"...Oh. Well, I guess I'll just lift weights or something. I don't think it'd be very comfortable to run." Heero nodded.

"I'll join you then. Let me go change."

"I'll come too," Trowa said, also heading upstairs.

"Yeah me too!" Duo shouted, running to catch up. Quatre sighed and followed, with Midii behind him.

Not long after that found the six teens in the Peacecraft mansion's personal gym. Trowa, Quatre, and Duo were running laps around the track, while Heero, Wufei, and Midii lifted weights. When they had entered the room, Midii had walked right over and started her usual routine. However, it took Wufei and Heero a while to figure out which weights they could now lift.

"Damn it!" Wufei exclaimed. He was using both arms to lift the size weight he usually lifted, and even then, he could barely get it inches off the rack. "Damn weak woman body!" he grunted, sweat breaking out across his forehead. "Can't even lift this stupid weight with BOTH arms!"

"Give it up, Wufei," Heero said, looking over at him. "That body isn't as well-trained as your normal body. Just lift something lighter today."

"No! I know I can lift this!" He paused, holding the weight no more than six inches in the air, and dropped it back onto the rack. "Ok," Wufei panted. "Maybe not." He looked out the window to the track. "How the hell can they do that?" he asked, gesturing to the three running outside. Heero glanced out, and shrugged.

"Well, Quatre never hit his 'time-of-the-month.'"

"Lucky bastard," Wufei grumbled under his breath.

"As for the other two...I don't know. Maybe it doesn't bother them or something." Off to the side, Midii smirked to herself.

"How could it not?" Wufei asked. "I mean, it feels like I'm wearing a God damn...diaper or something. It's not funny, damn it!" he shouted, as Midii started laughing.

"Sorry," Midii said, trying to stifle her laughter. "But if it bothers you so much, then why don't you wear a-"

"Hell no," Heero said, cutting her off. "We can deal, thank you very much." Midii shrugged.

"Suit yourself." There was silence for a while, as the trio continued their workout. A little while later, the silence was broken as Duo poked his head into the room.

"Hey guys!" he shouted enthusiastically. "We're gonna play some football, wanna come?"

"Football?" asked Midii incredulously.

"Well, not really. We're just gonna toss a ball around for a while," Duo replied.

"Sure," Heero said, grabbing a towel to wipe off his sweat.

"Yeah, I'll come," Midii said.

"Football is not something weak women should play," Wufei stated, crossing his arms.

"Are you saying you're weak, Wu-man?" Duo asked, a wide smile covering his face. Wufei scowled, and started walking towards the door.

"No," he said. "I'M not a woman. I'm really a man." Duo rolled his eyes and followed him out.

"Whatever man."


* * *


"Hey Heero! Go long!" Duo shouted, raising his arm with the football in it. Heero looked up and somewhat reluctantly backed up. He caught the ball easily as Duo threw it to him.

"I never liked football," Midii said casually. She was lying in the grass, propped up on her elbows. Next to her, Quatre nodded his head, and plucked a flower off the ground.

"Me neither. It just never caught my interest," he said, adding the flower to the necklace he was making.

"Football's a good sport," Wufei spoke up. He picked another flower up and held it up to the sun as if he were examining it. "It requires a strong body. That's why mainly men play it. Women are too weak and fragile." He let go of the flower, watching it fall to the ground.

"You know, at the rate you're going, I wouldn't be surprised if that funky lady never changed you back," Midii said, glancing at Wufei who had gone several shades paler.

"No, she said after two weeks she'd change us back," said Quatre, looking at Midii. "I don't think she'd lie."

"Quatre, she never said that. She said she 'thought two weeks would be enough time.' She THOUGHT. Maybe she'll discover she was wrong and leave you as women for a year," Midii replied. Wufei groaned and fell back into the grass. A sudden shout from the field caused Midii, Wufei, and Quatre to jump up. Looking around, they discovered that the source of the sound was Trowa, who was sitting in the grass with his arms wrapped around his chest. Duo was standing across from him with a look of shock on his face, and Heero was hovering above Trowa.

"What happened?" Midii panted, as she and the other two ran over to them.

"I-I threw the ball to Trowa, but he didn't catch it," Duo replied, his eyes still wide.

"You threw a bullet pass at him," Heero stated.

"I thought he could catch it!"

"You forgot to TELL him you were going to throw it!" Heero shouted back.

"Wait, wait, wait," Midii said, stepping between them. "He didn't catch the football. Got that. Now why is he on the ground?"

"The ball hit him in the chest and he fell over," Heero answered. Midii eyes widened.

"It hit him in the chest?!" Heero looked at her oddly, and nodded. Midii immediately knelt down beside Trowa and put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you ok?" she asked worriedly.

"Owwww," was the reply she got. "Holy...shit...that...really hurt," Trowa gasped.

"Tell me about it," Midii said sympathetically. Trowa finally looked up and the others noticed that his eyes looked more watery than usually.

"Oh my God. Pain, lot's of pain," Trowa said to no one in particular. He finally moved his arms from his chest. "That's gonna leave a bruise," he muttered, glaring at Duo.

"Oh come on, it can't be that bad," Wufei said scornfully. Trowa turned his glare on him.

"It's probably the equivalent of being kicked in the balls," Midii spat out, rubbing Trowa's shoulder. The others looked at him expectantly.

"Yeah, that's probably right. Geez, it hurt like hell!" The others winced at that.

"Ok then, forget my previous statement," Wufei said dismissively.

"Yo, T-man. Gomen, I had no idea. I really thought you would catch that pass," Duo said, scratching his head.

"It's ok Duo. I'm fine," Trowa said, finally standing up.

"You sure?" Trowa nodded. "Then can we eat lunch now? 'Cause I'm starved," Duo said sheepishly.

"Sure, let's go inside. The others will be home soon anyway," Midii said. She led the way back to the palace.


* * *


After lunch, the teens headed upstairs to clean off after working out. Heero, just out of the shower and wrapped in a towel, was searching the cabinets for more, *ahem*, feminine hygiene products. He was having no luck in finding them though. A knock sounded on the door, and Heero shouted for the person to come in.

"I need more, um, pad thingies," Wufei said, as he walked into the bathroom.

"Yeah? Well so do I, but I can't find anymore," Heero replied. Wufei glanced around.

"Damn, that's not good." Heero shook his head, and opened another cabinet. A small smile crossed his face.

"Found them!" he said triumphantly. Then he frowned. "Uh, there's only one left." Wufei's eyes narrowed.

"Well, I need it, it's mine."

"Um, no, I found it, so it's mine!"

"Damn it Heero I need it more than you! Give it to me!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!" An all out fight ensued just as Duo walked by the door.

"Whoa, guys, what're you doing? Stop it!" he shouted. Heero and Wufei looked over at him. "What're you fighting over?" He eyed the problem of the fight and started to chuckle. "You guys are STILL wearing those?" he questioned, trying not to laugh. Wufei and Heero's eyebrows shot up.

"You mean, you time's over?" Wufei asked. Duo blinked.

"Well, no. I think it almost is though, but hell, what do I know?"

"So...what did you mean?" Heero asked warily.

"I was asking if you were still wearing pads," Duo replied.

"...You're not?" asked Wufei, his eyes widening.

"Pfft, no! Trowa and I got sick of them. They were too nasty and uncomfortable."

"So then...what're you wearing?" Wufei asked, though he was pretty sure he knew the answer.

"What do you think? Tampons, duh! We just asked Midii, and she gave us a box. It has the directions and everything!" Wufei and Heero looked at each other, and then back at Duo.

"What's it like?" Heero asked. Duo raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

"Uh, they're a lot more comfortable. They're easier to run in, because you can't really tell they're there. Um...you know what? This conversation's getting weird, so I'm just gonna leave you too alone now, ok? See ya," Duo said. He walked out of the bathroom. Heero and Wufei looked at each other again, then at the pad, then back at the door.

"Wait! Duo!" they shouted, and ran out after him.


* * *


Later, after the other girls had returned from high school, the phone rang.

"Can you get that, Dorothy?" Relena shouted from the kitchen. Dorothy nodded and picked up the phone. A few minutes later, she called Relena over.

"It's the people from the beach," she said. Relena looked confused for a second before realization dawned on her. Her eyes widened.

"And?" she prompted.

"They're checking to make sure we still are renting the beach house from tomorrow night to Wednesday. Standard procedure, they have to check." Relena nodded.

"I'd almost forgotten its spring break after tomorrow. Um...darn! I still wanna go!"

"Me too, but it's not really fair to the guys," Dorothy said.

"I know."

"Oh no! You are NOT canceling those reservations just because the guys are women now!" Hilde shouted, marching into the living room.

"Were you eavesdropping, Ms. Schlbeiker (sp?)?" Dorothy asked, raising an eyebrow. Hilde shrugged.

"I overheard you from the kitchen. But really, if it bothers the guys that much, they can stay here! Right? Please guys, I really wanna go to the beach," Hilde pleaded, putting on a puppy-dog face.

"Fine by me," Dorothy replied. She glanced at Relena.

"Sure," she said, shrugging. "Sounds good." Dorothy smirked, and spoke to the person on the phone again.

"Ok then, that's that. Let's tell the others," Dorothy said after she hung up.

A few minutes later:

"What?! We can't go to the beach! Are you crazy?" Duo shouted. The four other boys nodded in agreement.

"What do you expect us to do? Hang out in the house all day?" Heero asked, glaring at anything and everything. He didn't get a reply as the girls just looked at each other.

"Injustice!" shouted Wufei. "How come we have to be cooped up inside? I say we don't go!"

"Whoa, hold up," Sally said, holding up her hands. "First off, staying here is not fair to US. Second, YOU all don't have to go, you can stay here. Third, if you do go, no one said you have to stay inside." Sally ticked the options off on her fingers. Quatre blinked.

"Well, I DO want to go," the blonde said sheepishly.

"What's the point?" Duo asked, sulking on the couch. "We can't actually go to the beach."

"Why not?" Hilde asked. Now Duo blinked.

"Well...because...Trowa, tell 'em why."

"Actually, I was wondering the same thing. Why not, Duo?" Trowa replied. While Duo searched for an answer, Heero spoke up.

"We don't have proper bathing suits, for one."

"So," Sally started.

"We'll go bathing suit shopping," Relena finished. The five boys shrunk back in their seats.

"Yeah, problem solved!" Hilde added.

"Fine," Duo said after a while. "We go," he shuddered, "bathing suit shopping. Great. But that's only because I really wanna go to the beach!"

"You're going to have one heck of a weird tan when you're turned back into a guy," Midii said.

"Don't remind me," Duo grumbled.

"Ok, it's settled then. We'll pack tonight, Hilde will take you swimsuit shopping in the morning, and we'll leave for the beach after school," Relena exclaimed.

"Great," Duo mumbled. "Juuuust peachy."




*ducks all objects thrown at her* I am sooooo sorry! I took forever to get this chapter out, I know, and it's not near as good as the others. Plus it's really short! I needed a transition from the whole date scene to the beach scene though. The next chapter will be better, I promise! Remember to review! Ja ne!


*~Maxine~*