Harry Potter - Series Fan Fiction ❯ Another Life ❯ Ring Around The Rosie ( Chapter 13 )

Warnings: Yaoi/Slash, Angst, DARK themes, Backstabbing, Incest, Yuri/Fem-slash, and other various nastiness. Hard R rating.
Disclaimer: Ain't mine.

“It isn't far to Hushabye Mountain…and your boat waits down by the key…The winds of night so softly are sighing.. Soon, they will fly your troubles to sea…”

Harry slowly began to wake at the sounds of the lullaby. Fingers were brushing through his shaggy hair, soft and loving. He wondered if he were still dreaming of a time when his mother had been alive and held him in her arms, singing to her darling baby boy, then realized that it was a male singing. The gentle voice filling his ears was familiar, a soft baritone with just the slightest hint of scratchiness of a hard life. Harry strained to recognize the man.

“So close your eyes on Hushabye Mountain…Wave good-bye to cares of the day…And watch your boat from Hushabye Mountain.. sail far away.. from lullaby.. bay…”

At last, the teen was able to open his eyes, staring up at the familiar face of Remus Lupin. It was still night time but the moonlight gave him just enough light to make out the man’s face.

“Hello, Harry,” he said softly, as if it would break some spell to speak at normal level. Harry slowly sat up, staring at him. He reached over, touching the werewolf’s face to make sure he was real and alive, before throwing his arms around him. Remus held him close, rubbing his back and saying soothing things to him. “It’s all right now, Harry…It’s okay. You’re safe now..”

Harry only held on tighter because for a week, he had thought the man might be gone forever. He felt a sob form in his throat and tried to keep it down, shivering from the effort. Remus never let him go as he shook in his arms. The wolf was Harry’s last link to his parents, his last, steady anchor, his friend of few, a protector that would never abandon him.

“Remus,” Harry whispered fiercely, pulling his face from the man’s shoulder to look at him. “Don’t leave me."

‘Again’ was unsaid, but they both knew it was underlying. Remus felt a stab of shame for having run out of Snape’s home that night…and that just brought back the sensitive issue of Harry’s parentage. He would love the boy no matter who his father was, because that wouldn’t change who Harry was, and that was the most important thing.

“I won’t,” Remus told him, squeezing his shoulders. “Never.”

He didn’t notice Sirius standing in the doorway until it was too late. Harry went very still, his green eyes going wide as he stared over Remus’s shoulder. Slowly, the wolf looked back and mentally cursed his friend for his bad timing.

“Harry,” Sirius called, his face and voice as lost as the boy that stared at him. Remus carefully climbed off the bed.

“Sirius, this isn’t a good time-”

“You see him.” The whispered words were enough to cut Remus off in mid thought, nearly causing him to bite his own tongue. He looked back at Harry, who was now staring at him as his face paled of color.

“Yes, Harry. I see him. He’s really here.”

“No he’s not,” the boy said. Then, he cracked a grin but it was in no way a good one. “Which means you’re not. Which means you really are dead. Am I dead?”

Shocked as he was by hearing Harry actually speaking, not just whispering or motioning, and then by the boy‘s very words, Remus said nothing, but Sirius quickly spoke up, “No! You’re not dead and neither are we!”

A sick, bitter chuckle fell from Harry’s mouth as he ducked his head. Sirius and Remus moved towards the bed, but stopped when the boy’s head came up abruptly and he let out a loud, horrible laugh. They were struck dumb, watching the sound pour painfully from Harry’s small body, watching as tears began to stream down his cheeks.

“-Oh god -ha hahaha-I‘m dead -hee hee-dead as a doornail-haha hahaha-must be in hell-”

At last, Sirius couldn’t take it anymore. He climbed up onto the bed and grabbed Harry, dragging the boy against him as he nearly crushed him in his arms. Harry choked through laughter and bitter sobs, laying limply in his godfather’s arms, head dropped back and eyes staring at the ceiling as he shook. Remus got up behind him and hugged him as well, encircling the boy in their warmth.

Harry’s laughter and tears died off as he fell back into sleep between them a while later. Sirius carefully laid him down and then laid beside him, stroking his godson’s face and hair, his own cheeks wet. Remus did the same on Harry’s other side. They spent the rest of the night that way.

Both swore they would follow the boy to hell if they had to in order to protect him.

“Severus, you are helping no one but the Dark Lord himself by keeping Harry’s location to yourself.”

Dark eyes stared back into blue without a word, but Dumbledore knew the younger man was brimming with self satisfaction.

“Please, Severus. Think of Harry.”

“I am,” retorted Severus Snape quietly.

“He could be captured at any moment without protection…” He paused as he noted amusement enter the other man’s eyes. “Who is he with?”

Nothing. Silence reigned. Dumbledore sighed softly.

“I’m sorry that it has come to this,” said the Headmaster quietly as he pulled a phial of pale liquid from his robes, “but you leave me no choice.”

The Veritaserum was then administered and he waited for it to settle.

“What is your full name?”

“Severus Rodian Snape.” The voice wasn’t sluggish, though his black eyes were barely open and stared down at his own feet.

“What is your occupation?”

There was a slight pause before, “Potions Master, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Double agent.”

Dumbledore watched him, studying the drugged man quietly. He would wait until later before going down that road.

“Where is Harry Potter?”

“I don’t know.” He studied Snape quietly, but there was no sign of rejection from the serum.

“Where did the portkey send him?”

“I don’t know.”

“Who created the portkey?”

“Remus Lupin.”

Dumbledore blinked a little. Remus was alive then, and apparently not in his pocket anymore. This annoyed him but he would work around it. Harry had to be returned to him.

“Where will Remus take Harry?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why not?”

“I told him not to tell me.”

‘He expected to be captured and questioned,’ Dumbledore thought with a frown. This did not bode well, but he expected no less from his spy. The aged wizard sat back as he thought to himself, watching the veritaserum slowly wear off the younger man. Suddenly, a slow smile spread over his lips.

He knew exactly how to gain Harry back.

“How is he?” Narcissa asked quietly from the doorway. Remus got up and took her arm gently, leading her back into the hall as he closed the door behind them.

“It’s worse than I thought,” he told her softly. “He’s close to breaking completely.”

“But your presence and Sirius’s must be of some help…”

“No. That only makes him more certain that he’s died and gone to Hell.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair tiredly. “No matter what we say, he won’t believe us.”

“We have to get Severus back.” He glanced up at her, but Narcissa was looking off, thinking as she delicately held her chin. “The boy has been with Severus for the last few weeks. Surely he can get through to him…”

“Maybe, but how? He gave himself up to Dumbledore to get Harry to us.”

“You leave that to me.” She smiled. “Go back and tend to him as best you can. I’ll take care of Severus.”

Before he could respond, the blonde woman left. Remus sighed a bit and went on back inside. He looked at the figure on the bed, Harry fitfully sleeping, enveloping in the sheets. Sirius had gone for a little while, unable to stand the sight of Harry‘s distress. Remus hated the pain his two precious people were going through, but he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to help be.

He yawned. It had been at least two days since he got sleep, between planning the escape, creating the portkey for Severus, and gathering Harry after. He fought to keep his eyes open, to stay on watch while Sirius was away, but sleep claimed him rather quickly.

Soon after Remus had fallen asleep, the door cracked open. The pale form of Draco Malfoy entered, quiet as a mouse, and shut the door behind him. He stepped slowly to the bed, staring at the boy sleeping within it. Harry was so very small in the big bed, vulnerable and weak. Draco reached out before he could stop himself and touched the boy’s pale cheek. It was cold and a little rough under his fingers. Black prickles needed to be shaved down. Draco had never thought to see that on Harry Potter’s baby face. It was one of the many things that made him realize with a jolt that Harry Potter was just as old and young as himself, just as human as himself, just as… He let his thoughts fade away and instead looked down at the hero of the magical world.

“I don’t envy you,” he said quietly. There was no response, but he didn’t expect any. On their own volition, his fingers traced over Harry’s cheeks, his forehead, his eyes, nose, mouth. Things were always so much more real when one touched them. From his face, they moved through his shaggy hair, so much softer than it had any right to be… Draco was enthralled by the feel. As he gazed at the sleeping face, he wondered how something so dead inside could make him feel so much.

He hated Potter, that was true. He hated the idiot Gryffindor who got all the attention, all the praise, all the glory, who had spurned his friendship, dared to think he was better, who hated him right back…His hands slid around the pale, slender throat. Harry’s pulse thrummed into him, soft and unhurried. Draco wanted to hurt him. His fingers tightened around the unprotected flesh. Harry’s lips parted as he drew in a raspy breath, eyelashes fluttering in the warning of waking. Draco watched in morbid fascination as those emerald eyes opened and seemed so black in the darkness, staring up at him as he slowly but surely took his life. Harry didn’t fight him, didn’t try to knock him off or pry his hands away, and his face was so pitiable…

Draco let go and watched as Harry gasped in a breath and then a few more, finally reaching up to rub his throat. It was quiet, except for his ragged breathing and that disturbed Draco more than the almost-murder.

“Why…did you stop…?”

“I don’t know,” he answered truthfully. Harry looked at him with those big, young, broken eyes as he slowly sat up. They were the same size, mostly, he and Draco, so when both were sitting, they were eye to eye. This didn’t make Draco feel any more comfortable.

“I wouldn’t blame you,” Harry said. “Not that it matters. When did you die?”

“…I’m not sure I’ve ever been alive,” responded Draco with a soft sigh. He looked down at his hands. “I almost killed you.”

“I’m dead already. Do you regret it?”

“It was so easy.”

“Yes.”

“You’re weak. It would have snapped if I pushed a little more.”

“Yes.”

“I hate you.”

“Yes.”

Gray eyes lifted and took Harry in again. Without another word, Draco got up and left. Harry laid back down and turned onto his side, glancing towards the chair next to the bed.

“Don’t tell Sirius,” he said quietly.

“I won’t,” responded the shaky voice of Remus Lupin.

Narcissa was surprised to find the Dark Lord in her library, precisely where she had headed to find some way to go about her plan. He had a book in his hand, but he wasn’t reading it. He simply stood there, staring off into the distance.

“My Lord?” she prompted quietly, trying not to startle him. He turned and looked at her, those slowly darkening red eyes confused for a moment before clearing.

“Malfoy,” he greeted. He glanced down at the book, then put it away. “I gather that my son is not well?”

“No, my Lord.” She paused, wondering how to go about telling him, before deciding that bluntness may be the only way. “He believes he’s dead.”

“Dead?”

“Yes. And in Hell.”

“Hell.” Voldemort frowned at her but she knew it was not herself that his discomfort was directed to. “He is that damaged?”

“I believe the only way he will trust that Sirius Black is alive as well as himself is to bring Severus.”

Voldemort thought about this.

“My Lord, he may be the only one who can get through to the boy…” She paused when he waved a dismissive hand.

“I understand,” he said. “Severus must be retrieved in any case. He is loyal and I will repay that loyalty.”

She didn’t dispute that. After Severus’ full confession, he had sworn loyalty not to Voldemort himself, but to the Riddle Heir, Harry Potter. Both she and Lord Voldemort knew that that was a far stronger promise than either would ever find again. The moment Severus saved the boy from his relatives was the moment he had become the boy’s guardian from then on. It made Narcissa a little worried, however. Apparently, there were three men who now claimed that title. How they worked this out between one another would be quite a show…

Before anything more could be said, the door to the library was thrown open and a black roped figure stumbled in.

“Mistress!” he gasped, throwing the hood back to reveal a head of brown curls and a flushed face. “Mistress! Severus Snape is to be executed on three days!”

A sudden thrust into warmth. He gasped and clung to it, eyes wide as he tried frantically to figure out how he’d gotten outside. It didn’t really matter, not when Lillian held him so close and she was so warm. He felt like ice. He couldn’t feel his fingers, his hands, it was all numb but she was so very warm…

“Leave, Malfoy.” Her voice sounded far away, but he vaguely noticed the anger behind her words, the bitterness and mistrust and pure, unadulterated hate… And then he was being led inside. She set him in his chair by the fire, which was so hot that he felt like he was burning, but he would take that burning, if only he could feel his hands again…

“Drink,” she murmured softly, pressing a glass to his lips, and he did so. The liquid burned down his throat, warmth spreading to his stomach and beyond. She carefully undressed him, stripping the mud and snow and blood covered cloth from his body. He didn’t care to know what she would do with it.

And then she was hugging him, her face hidden against his neck, her breath hitting his skin in quick, irregular puffs.

“Thank Merlin I was here tonight,” he heard her whisper to herself and by the hitches and the slight wetness hitting his skin, he knew she was crying. He hugged her tightly and tried to return the comforts she was giving him.

“Sleep walking,” he murmured to her consolingly, his voice rough and sounding oddly like a hiss. “I was sleep walking… Lucius must have found me…”

“No, no…” she sobbed.

“Yes,” he responded. “Yes, he must have found me.”

Her hands slid into his hair as she pulled back to look at him. The wet trails down her grief flushed cheeks and her wet eyes disturbed him so much… He hastened to wipe the tears away but more fell anew.

“Oh Merlin, please don’t cry,” he begged her, but it only made it worse.

“Can’t you see what’s happening to you?” she sobbed. “What he’s doing to you?”

“Who? Lillian, please!”

“Malfoy! Lucius Malfoy!” yelled the hysterical woman. “He’s killing you, Thomas! He’s killing you one piece at a time and you can’t see it, can you? How many nights a week do you ‘sleepwalk’?!”

He simply stared at her. It had been getting better after she came back. The blackouts were less frequent, the amount of strange things finding there way there was lessening, his nightmares were beginning to go away…and then it began getting bad again. He felt suddenly sobered to that realization.

“You should go,” he said and her tears increased. He brought her close, kissed her as tenderly as he ever could. He hated that he had upset her, hated how useless he was to her, how useless he was to stop the cause of their combined pain. “You should go.”

“Thomas-”

“Your husband will miss you.”

That always worked. Lillian stayed only a little longer and then left, the guilt and worry heavy in her green eyes.

That night, he dreamed of doing horrible things. He resolved, when he had awaken, to contact Dumbledore and end the insanity that had fully engulfed his life.

A/N: I am so sorry it took so long!! I don't know what was wrong with me but I had a really hard time getting through this chapter... Sorry!!

I went ahead and added the fourth condition, since it's pretty much a given by now...

Acknowledgements:

Shell - It'll get better eventually, but be ready for lots of angst in the mean time.
Lady Azar de Tameran - I'm still not sure if Harry will have a relationship with anyone like that. Sev/Harry is definately out, as they are far more like father and son. As for Tom....well, we're getting closer to finding that out.
as - Yes, Snape is loyal (mostly) to Tom.
Jillypooh - I like Hermione sometimes but she also annoys the hell out of me a lot too.
DestinyEntwinements - Oh, I know what you mean! Anytime I lose my comp for a while I'm just inconsolible.
oracale - Thanks
Sh'arra Rie - Glad you like it
Jimmy - Personally, I love "I AM your father" fics. I dunno why. I'm glad you plan to read more of this despite that theme. At least I've confused the issue, what with Harry have not one but THREE father figures...::snerk::
ShadowsofNyx - Lol!! I don't know how long it'll take to finish.
Jadein - Lily's situation is something far more complicated than an imperius charm. Glad you liked my way of handling Dumbledore. As for the rest, only time will tell.
Editor Crawl - Good!! You're suppose to be surprised at every turn!! And yeah, it is just the beginning.
japanese-jew - Thanks muchly!
Barranca - You'll see what Dumbledore knows. Tom? MPD? Sort of. And 'Tom' does not actively oppose anyone. ::smile::
Strife - Oh wow. I went so incredibly bright red when I read your review. Thank you so much!! I can't say much, but I can say that you're hitting close to a few things.

Conditions Met:
1. Voldemort must be Harry's father
2. Severus eventually is loyal to Voldemort (unfinished)
3. Sirius comes back
4. Black and Lupin side with Harry