Harukanaru Toki No Naka De Fan Fiction ❯ Unbroken ❯ Reciprocation ( Chapter 7 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: sailorlight22 
Same as last time, ongoing
Anime/Manga: Harukanaru Toki No Naka De Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Supernatural / Hentai / Fantasy | Type: Shounen-ai | Uploaded On: 01.17.2008 | Pages: 3 | Words: 5.3K | Visits: 152 | Status: Work In Progress
Same as last time, ongoing
Anime/Manga: Harukanaru Toki No Naka De Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Supernatural / Hentai / Fantasy | Type: Shounen-ai | Uploaded On: 01.17.2008 | Pages: 3 | Words: 5.3K | Visits: 152 | Status: Work In Progress
Unbroken
A Haruka Naru Toki No Naka De Fanfiction
By SailorLight22
Chapter 7 - Reciprocation
I do not own these wonderful bishies, only the plot to this ficlette.. My first Haruka fic, should i continue? XD ANY replies would be appreciated, be easy though, k?
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WARNINGx2! This chapter contains is pretty much nothing but Adult Material! While I'm sure no one minds, I wanted to warn you!
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Yasuaki sighed, enjoying the warmth of his companion's body.
Tightening his grip, he moved quickly, rolling them over. Leaning down, he gently nipped at his partner's neck, his hand sliding down to stroke him again. Eisen moaned, shivering at the feeling. "It's so good, like that.." Yasuaki nodded, sucking lightly on the lobe of his ear.
"Very good," He murmured, his voice teasing. "I see what you meant, about being able to enjoy pleasing your lover.. It is a good feeling, to know that they want you.." He shifted slightly, his lips moving down the side of his partner's throat. "Do you, Eisen? Do you want any of the things you heard today, with me? Don't be afraid to tell me what you liked, what you wondered about.."
Eisen gasped, embarrassment and excitement competing for dominance within him at the husky tone of his lover's words. Closing his eyes, he moaned as the older man removed his hand, grasping his hips and pulling his body up to press against his own. He leaned forward, his hands slipping beneath the smaller man's back to support his weight as he rocked slowly against him.
"Is this right, Eisen? When I did it before, you were so loud.." He sighed, remembering. "The sound you made.. I thought I had hurt you. But it didn't hurt at all, did it? It felt so good that you couldn't help yourself." He smiled, kissing his partner's reddened cheek. "I want to make you feel like that, over and over until you beg me to stop." He slowed his movements, biting down gently on his speechless partner's shoulder. "I want to make you feel so good that you can't bear it, Eisen.. I want to hear you scream like that again."
Eisen whimpered, biting his lip. He couldn't believe that Yasuaki was saying these things, without even the slightest hint of self-consciousness, and he couldn't believe that it was affecting him like this. The thought of doing those things alone was enough to bring a blush to his face, but the way his partner said it... He didn't doubt for a moment that the older man meant every word, that he was more than willing to do exactly as he said.
Gasping, he arched up, his knees shaking. Yasuaki moaned quietly against his throat, sliding one hand beneath the soft fabric of his sleepwear. Eisen let out a startled squeak at the feeling of his partner's hand on his skin, his long fingers tugging insistantly at the knotted tie of his underclothes. "May I?" He murmured, leaning up to face his flustered lover. "Please let me touch you.."
The younger man nodded hesitantly, his eyes wide. "Yasuaki... Are you sure that you're all rightwith this? What you're doing is wonderful, but..." He faltered, gazing up at his face. The expression there was one of hope, slightly pleading and sincere. He nodded again, closing his eyes. "Please, if that's what you want..."
The priest leaned in, kissing him softly before replying. "Do you want it? I would give you everything, anything that you need.. You haven't refused, but neither have you accepted, Eisen. I would never force you."
The almost saddened voice brougth tears to the monk's eyes, his hands clutching his partner's shoulders as he forced them back. "You.. think I don't want you? I didn't mean for you to think that, Yasuaki! That isn't right, you aren't forcing me to do anything.. I want you, and I want this.." He blushed fiercely. "Everything you said was so.. I just don't know what to say to you, there isn't a word that describes what this feels like."
He shuddered, shaking his head. "I.. I can't think of anything that I want more than this. Please, I'd stop you if I didn't want it Yasuaki." He smiled, closing his eyes. "You're right, about before. When you moved like that, it felt so good that I thought I might die. It made me want so much more, things that I didn't even know existed until now.. It was an empty feeling, like something was missing. Now that I know, everything will be all right."
He stroked his hands down the older man's sides, pulling their bodies together. "Please, do that again.. Make me lose myself, even for a little while?" He whispered, shifting his hands to his lover's waist. He pressed his shoulders to the floor for leverage, lifting his hips in open invitation. Feeling the evidence of the older man's renewed arousal, he whimpered pleadingly. "I need to feel you on my skin.."
Yasuaki gasped sharply at his soft words, tightening his hold on the younger man. "Yes," He said, moving his hands from beneath to above as he untied the sash of his lover's short robe. "I want that too.." He pushed the material aside, ghosting his hand over the softness beneath. Reaching up, he gripped the smaller man's shoulders, lifting him just enough to slide his arms from the short sleeves. He set the garment aside, lowering his head to the blushing monk's chest. Inhaling the slight fragrance of him, he pressed slow kisses to his skin, his lips almost worshipful.
Eisen sighed, wrapping his arms around his partner. "I love you.." He murmured, shivering as the priest found a particularly sensitive spot. "Don't ever doubt that I want you, Yasuaki.. I just can't think when I'm so close to you, feeling like this makes me so happy that I can't express it with words."
Yasuaki smiled. "Then don't use them," He said, breath warm on his lover's stomach. "If words fail you, just let them go and show me.." He mouthed a trail across the smaller man's skin, pausing to lap at one pale nipple. Eisen gasped in surprise, the quiet sound breaking into a moan as his partner sucked lightly before turning his attention to the other side, drawing his tongue over the sensitive skin.
Feeling his shivers, the older man sighed contentedly as he resumed his exploration. Sliding back, he traced the curve of one hip with his palm, his motions gentle and unhurried. "So soft," He murmured, stroking the inside of his partner's thighs. "I remember how it felt, to have you wrapped around me.." He turned his head, kissing the bend of one knee. "You were so warm, and every time you moved with me I wanted more.."
He smiled, shaking his head. "I was afraid that I might do something wrong, but I just couldn't get enough of you. Even now, I want to have you like that again."
Eisen whimpered, nodding quickly. "I..I know.." He gasped, closing his eyes. "You don't have to be afraid, it was perfect." Blushing, he smiled. "I didn't want it to end, but it felt so good that I couldn't stop.."
Leaning forward, Yasuaki shifted his weight carefully until he could reach his partner's hand. Tugging gently, he urged him to rise. Still kneeling, he embraced him tightly, smoothing his hands over the skin of his lover's back. "I don't want to rush you," He whispered, kissing him slowly. "If you want to stop, tell me. I wouldn't be upset with you.."
Eisen shook his head. "I don't want to stop, Yasuaki. I'm willing to give you anything, if there's something you need from me.." He smiled, shyly. "What do you need? Do you need me to hold you like that, close enough to feel everything?" He leaned back, pulling the older man down. Shifting his knees, he pressed his legs tightly against the man's waist, fitting their bodies together. "You were there, and then you moved and it felt so..good," He shivered, rocking up in imitation.
Yasuaki gasped, moaning softly as his partner repeated the motion, the feeling of his bare skin intensifying the familiar sensation. "Is that what you need, Yasuaki?" Eisen whispered, closing his eyes. "I love this feeling, so warm.." He lowered one hand, taking hold of his partner's. Tugging gently, he guided their joined hands down, pressing the stunned priest's palm to himself with a quiet whimper. "Please, touch me.."
Yasuaki complied, fondling him slowly. Hearing the younger man's encouraging murmurs, he shivered, tracing the edge of his undergarment until he located the loose knot that secured it. He paused, meeting his lover's gaze steadily. While there were traces of lingering anxiety, his eyes held no fear, only silent pleading. Drawing a breath, he pulled gently at the slender cord, feeling it give way beneath his shaking fingers. Still watching the other's face, he pushed the material aside, slipping his hand beneath it to touch the silken hardness there.
Eisen gasped, his eyes wide at the almost shocking pleasure he felt. He couldn't believe that something so simple could feel so good, that the lightest touch of his partner's hands could make him want so many things.. He arched into the contact, his face heating at his own wanton actions. "Yasuaki.!" He gasped, closing is eyes as he felt the man resume his slow strokes, "Please..Please don't-!" He moaned, his hands clutching the abused blankets as he struggled to convey his need. "It feels.. so good!" He managed, panting.
His partner shifted, leaning down to kiss him hungrily. His quiet groan was silenced by the older man's insistent mouth, his tongue demanding entry that was eagerly granted. Eisen almost sobbed as he felt the priest shudder against him, his breath harsh as he pulled away. "Is this enough? I want to give you what you need, Eisen," He said, his voice breaking. The monk shook his head, his eyes shut tight with embarassed urgency.
"Not just me.. I want you to feel like this too! I..I think we should.." He stammered, biting his lip. "Do you want me? I'll let you.." He averted his face, feeling his partner's eyes on him. "If you want to do it like that, I'm not afraid.."
Yasuaki groaned at the offer, his hands sliding up to his lover's flaming cheeks. Cradling his face, he kissed him again, urging him to relax. Pulling slightly back, he waited for the younger man to open his eyes before speaking. "I don't want to hurt you, Eisen," He whispered. "I do want you, so much that it frightens me." He shook his head, his voice intense. "The very thought of being inside you..Making you mine.." He shuddered, closing his eyes. "It's enough to drive me mad. I..I don't think I could control myself, Eisen. I could hurt you, and..!" He gasped, opening his eyes as he felt the other man's hands on his shoulders.
"I trust you," Eisen whispered, pleadingly. "I know you wouldn't hurt me, Yasuaki.. I want to be yours, please let me give you that much.." He wrapped his arms around the taller man, pulling him down again. "When we were..together before, I thought that there was nothing more I could give you." He paused, shaking his head. "I meant for you to have all of me. If I hadn't been ready then, maybe I would be afraid of this." He smiled. "I'm not afraid because I decided that this is what I want. There's no one else for me, Yasuaki..If you don't want this, I won't ask again. I'll wait forever if I have to."
Yasuaki returned his embrace, shaking his head. "I wouldn't make you wait, Eisen. If you truly want that with me, all you need to do is ask. My only wish is to give you happiness.."
The younger man sighed, stroking his partner's hair. "I want it, Yasuaki.. I've thought about it, how it would feel.. I want you to take me, just like I wanted it before. That's why I felt so strange, I wanted to feel you in me.." He blushed, shivering. "Please, do you want that too?"
Yasuaki nodded ferverently. "Yes, very much.. I'm afraid of hurting you, but I want to try it, to see if I can make you feel the same thing I felt when you put your mouth on me, like you're going to lose your mind." He paused, rising just enough to rest their foreheads together. 'What was it, the word that fool of a General used?' He sighed, struggling to think in his impassioned haze.
"I don't want to think of him right now, but if nothing else, Tachibana was right about something.." He smiled, closing his eyes as he nestled against the heat of his partner's body. "I want to do this with you, to feel you shaking under me when we move.. I want to hear every sound you make, and know that you feel so very good, because of me." He lowered his voice, whispering softly to his fiercely blushing lover. "I want to do just as he said, Eisen.. I want to make you scream my name when you come.."
The younger man gasped, his mind reeling at the priest's blatant admission. He bit his lip, shaking his head even as a broken whimper escaped him. Forcing his thoughts into some semblance of order, he tried to reply. His voice came out strained, shaky with need. "Gods, Yasuaki.." He laughed giddily, unable to stop himself. "It already feels like I'm losing my mind, just listening to you say something like that.. Please, do whatever you wish. I need you, so much that it aches.." He shivered with nerves, unable to fight down the rising heat that accompanied his own words.
"I..I have something.. that we need, I keep it for my hands in the winter.. If you want me to..?" He stammered, his face burning. His partner nodded slowly, understanding what he meant.
"Where?" He murmured, stroking the monk's cheek gently. Wordlessly, Eisen gestured towards his right, at a finely crafted chest nearby. Yasuaki lifted himself carefully, moving just enough to reach the unlocked lid. Opening it, he saw a glass bottle of pale liquid, and several small trinkets. Taking the bottle, he closed the chest before returning to his place between his beloved's parted knees. He sat the fragile container close by, leaning down to kiss the younger man. "I won't do this if it hurts you, Eisen," He said, meeting the other's eyes. "Please, will you promise to stop me if you feel pain?"
The seriousness of his voice left no room for refusal. Eisen nodded, his face still warm. "I promise.. I think it may feel strange at first, because Tachibana-san said it might, but if it truly feels unpleasant, I'll tell you."
The priest smiled, his hands moving over his lover's chest. "That is all I ask, Eisen. Tell me..everything." He sighed, trailing his fingers down the soft skin of the other's stomach. "Beautiful," He whispered, "More than anything in this world.."
The younger man moaned, ignoring the slight tickle. He let his hands tangle loosely in the strands of his partner's hair, which fell forward as the man bent his head to drop soft kisses against his hip. "Not anything, Yasuaki," He said, smiling. "But thank you."
The priest nipped him, chuckling when he squeaked. "Don't be modest."
Eisen mumbled something under his breath, nodding.
Yasuaki shifted back, running his palms up the monk's legs. Reaching down, he carefully pulled the bottle's stopper out, tipping a generous amount of the slightly chilly substance into his hand. Sitting the open container safely on the floor, he spread the oil over his hands, warming it as he did. The faint scent of it was pleasant, reminding him of almonds.
He took a breath, relaxing as much as possible. "Are you ready, Eisen? I'll take as much time as you need.." His partner shivered, but nodded.
"You don't have to worry, Yasuaki.. I know that I need to let you do this, and I have to try to stay calm. Please?" The older man sighed quietly in relief, cupping his hand over his lover gently. Feeling the monk's faint shudder, he smiled, his touches slow and deliberate.
After a moment, he lowered his hand until he felt the warm skin of his partner's opening against his fingers. He murmured reassuringly, spreading the slippery liquid over it before pressing the tip of his finger inward. Seeing no sign of pain on his lover's face, he continued, pausing only when he felt slight resistance. Glancing up, he saw the younger man bite his lip, and he slid his finger back before pressing forward steadily. The monk gasped quietly, shivers travelling up his body.
Feeling him relax again, Yasuaki continued his slow movements, gradually adding more oil as he inserted a second finger. Eisen whimpered, releasing his partner's hair to free his hands. He panted softly, his eyes squeezed shut. "Yasuaki.." He breathed, shifting imperceptibly. "It.. it feels.. Please?" He moved hesitantly, urging the priest to go on.
The older man moaned quietly in acknowledgement, resuming his gentle strokes. The pliant feeling of his partner's heated flesh was maddening, but he forced himself to be patient. His fingers brushed against a small ridge inside of his lover, and he heard the man gasp loudly before shuddering. Alarmed, he withdrew slightly. "Did I hurt you?" He demanded, searching the smaller man's face intently.
The monk shook his head firmly. "No, it didn't hurt at all.. It was odd, but it felt good.. Would you.." His voice faltered, a startled moan cutting his request short as the older man curled his fingers against that place again. Gasping for breath, he pressed back against his partner's hand pleadingly, his own hands clenched in the bedding beneath them as Yasuaki increased his pace slightly.
"Like that?" He murmured softly, "Do you like the way it feels, Eisen?" He shivered at the other man's almost desperate cries, his heart pounding with growing excitement. Carefully, he added one last digit, twisting his hand to stretch his partner's entrance as well as possible for the next step. "Gods, I want you.. Are you ready for more?"
Eisen bucked, his legs shaking. "Yes.." He whimpered, breathlessly. "I need you, please!" His face burned at the words, and he knew that he must sound like a harlot, begging for his partner's touch. The feeling of embarrassment was nothing compared to the raw desire he felt, and it was quickly discarded at the almost painful emptiness left behind as his lover withdrew his hands.
Yasuaki reached for the bottle once more, carefully gathering the sweet-scented oil in his palm before replacing the stopper. Forcing himself to remain calm, he coated himself thoroughly, gasping at the slick warmth of his hand. Biting his lip, he knelt between the younger man's legs, feeling his slight tremors as he urged his knees up. Meeting those wide eyes, he leaned down, speaking quietly in what he hoped were reassuring tones. "Don't let me hurt you, tell me to stop if it isn't right.." He murmured, sighing when his lover nodded.
"I promise," He whispered, pleadingly. "Please, don't be afraid anymore. I want this.." He begged, casting off his shame as he relaxed his tight hold on the blanket. "I want to feel you, let me?"
Yasuaki smiled, shaking his head. "Always, Eisen." He lowered his still-wet hand, spreading the remaining liquid over his partner before pressing forward slowly, alert for the smallest sign of discomfort. Eisen drew a quick breath, closing his eyes at the sensation of being stretched. There was no real pain, only a slight burning that dulled with the passage of several moments.
The feeling of his lover's body around him was electric, and Yasuaki struggled to control the urge to simply bury himself as deeply as possible within that resiliant heat. Certain that his beloved was unharmed, he moved again, moaning softly as he felt the smaller man grip his shoulders. Feeling resistance, he paused. "Are you all right?" He whispered, shifting his weight. "I can wait until you're ready.." He gasped, shivering as his partner raised his hips to draw him in. "Ei..Eisen!" He froze, terrified that the sudden movement could have been painful for his lover.
The younger man hissed quietly, his fingers tightening on his partner's shoulders. When he caught his breath, he opened his eyes to gaze up at the taller man, smiling. "It's.. It's fine, I didn't mean to upset you.. I just wanted.." He shifted his hips, holding his breath. "It feels strange, but there's no pain. Do you..like it?"
Yasuaki nodded jerkily, holding himself firmly in check. "Yes..It feels..Gods, there's no word to describe it. I want to.." He broke off, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I should have more control than this." He murmured. Closing his eyes, he pulled away, stilling instantly when his partner whimpered.
"Please don't wait! When you moved just then, it felt.." He shivered, pressing his lifted knees against the older man's hips. "It was good, don't stop.." His voice was low, but clear. Sensing his lover's hesitation, he raised his hips, wracking his scattered thoughts for something to convince the man to continue.
"You said to tell you if it hurts, didn't you? The wanting hurts more than anything we've done.." He closed his eyes, shaking his head. "I told you that I'll wait, Yasuaki. We can try again when you trust me not to lie to you."
The older man gasped. "It isn't like that, Eisen! I know you wouldn't lie.." He trailed off, biting his lip. "I love you," He whispered, resting his head against the smaller man's shoulder. "I couldn't control myself before, and this feels so much better.." He moved, pressing forward gently before withdrawing again. "I didn't know that I could have caused you pain, Eisen.. All I could think about was how good it felt, to be with you like that." He rocked forward, inhaling sharply.
"You see? Even now, it's too much. You should be telling me to stop.." He lifted his head, feeling the smaller man shake. "What is it? I didn't mean to.." His voice faltered, and he stared down at his partner's wide-eyed face aprehensively. "Eisen, tell me what's wrong!" He whispered urgently.
Eisen shook his head, swallowing loudly before attempting to speak. "There's nothing wrong, Yasuaki.." He replied, still trembling. "I understand that you're worried, but you shouldn't be." Slowly, he arched his body upwards, whimpering quietly. "You don't understand at all.." He allowed his back to straighten before lifting himself again, moaning brokenly as he heard the taller man's answering gasp at the feeling. "Every time you move, it's.. Oh!" He cried out in surprise, his fingers digging into his partner's biceps as the priest shifted his hips.
Startled, Yasuaki repeated his slow movements, watching his lover's face intently. The younger man lifted his body to meet him, his breathing hitched. "I don't want you to stop! This isn't something that you should keep control of, Yasuaki.." He slipped a hand up to the older man's nape, drawing him down.
"Please," He murmured, kissing his partner briefly before pulling away. "Don't be afraid to let go.." Tightening his grip, he hooked his foot around the priest's thigh, holding him close as he rocked his hips. "It doesn't hurt, I promise." He said, closing his eyes. "I can't believe how good you feel, Yasuaki.. Doesn't it feel good to you, being so close..?" He released his grip on the priest's back, hands trailing down to his waist. "It felt so good... Please, do it like that again?" He whispered, blushing.
Yasuaki nodded, still wary of his inexperience. He pulled back, gasping at the feeling of his lover's warmth. Bracing himself, he allowed his partner a moment to relax before beginning to move, his anxiety fading as the smaller man tightened his hold. "Is this right?" He asked, resting his weight on one arm. "Or should I.." He slipped the other arm beneath the younger man's hips, adjusting the angle of his body slightly.
Eisen moaned breathlessly, nodding. "Yes, anything... You feel...Yasuaki!" He cried, arching up as the priest raised him higher, feeling him thrust against the same place he'd found before. The older man gasped, surprised by his desperate voice.
"Like this?" He whispered, repeating the movement. The reaction was immediate, his partner's fingers clenching almost painfully against his skin as he moaned.
"Yes!" He panted harshly, wrapping his legs around his lover's waist. "There!" His voice shook as he cried out, feeling his partner move away. "Yasuaki, please!" The priest nodded eagerly, leaning close in reassurance.
"Whatever you need, Eisen.. I told you," He rocked his hips, feeling the smaller body shudder in his arms. "This is what I wanted you to feel, so good that you can't think." He pulled his lover close, increasing his pace. "You feel incredible, Eisen.. This heat, Gods, I can't believe how hot you are.." He smiled, seeing the effect of his quiet words. "Open your eyes, Eisen.. Look at me?"
The younger man complied, forcing himself to meet his partner's smouldering gaze. "Yasuaki.." He whimpered, his eyes hazed. "I think..!" Words became too much as the older man moaned raggedly, nodding.
"I know," He gasped, his movements becoming more insistant even as he spoke. "I can feel it, you're almost..there," He whispered, his thrusts turning forceful. "Please, Eisen..I want it, come for me?"
His partner shuddered, unable to reply. Releasing his hold on the priest's waist, he slipped his hands up to the older man's shoulder's, pulling him down to his elbows. The slight change in position drew a cry from them both, and Eisen locked his arms, arching to meet the downward slide of his lover's body. "Yasuaki!" He sobbed, "I'm ready..! Please, with me..Now!"
Growling in reply, the priest cast off his restraint, his thrusts erratic as the smaller man rose to meet them, his tight hold on the older man's shoulders the only thing that kept him from sliding backwards on the tangled sheets.
Feeling his partner arch up sharply, Yasuaki groaned, his own release overtaking him as he heard his name echo through the darkened room. Panting, he supported himself on his elbows as he lay his head against his lover's chest, the rapid beat of his heart slowing as they both sighed.
Stirring slightly, Eisen lifted a still-shaking hand to his partner's hair, stroking him in long, lazy movements. "Are you all right?" He whispered, smiling tiredly at the man's mumbled reply.
"Gods, Eisen.." He laughed quietly, lifting his head to reguard the smaller man's amused face. "I should be asking you the same question. Are you?" The monk laughed in response, tightening his embrace.
"If by 'all right' you mean happy, exhausted, relaxed and completely in love, then yes, I'm quite 'all right', Yasuaki." The priest shook his head, smiling.
"Thank you, my Isshiki.." Eisen laughed at the endearment, closing his eyes sleepily. Yasuaki lifted himself, drawing away with a wince as the younger man relaxed his tight hold. Feeling the damp stickyness between them, he searched the room quickly with his eyes, seeing the monk's washbasin atop a low table nearby. Reluctant to move, he sighed before rising quickly, retrieving the basin and the cloth that lay beside it.
Gently, he drew the soft material over his lover's skin, laughing quietly as the other mumbled in protest at the coolness. Once his lover was clean, Yasuaki rinsed the cloth and saw to himself, shivering at the cold water. Rinsing the cloth one last time, he set the basin aside, lying beside his almost dozing partner. After several moments of contented silence, Eisen stirred, arranging the blankets over them and curling tightly against the older man.
"I love you," He murmured, sighing as he felt the priest's arm encircle him and tug him close. "Promise me something, Yasuaki?"
The man nodded, waiting.
"Promise that you won't regret this? I don't think I could stand it, knowing that you wanted to take it back.."
Yasuaki shook his head, holding the smaller man to his chest in denial. "Never, Eisen. If I were to regret anything, it would be the time you spent waiting for me." He smiled. "I can't believe that you did that, just set aside your pain and your fears, waiting for something that might never have come." He stroked the monk's back, torn between a sob and a laugh. "It humbles me, to think of you being so patient and constant. I don't deserve your devotion, Eisen.. In the past, there must have been times that I hurt you, without knowing it..."
He would have continued, but a muffled protest stopped his self-disgust in midthought. "No more! I don't care about that, Yasuaki. In the past, you were the same as you are now. If there was something that needed to be said, you said it. Your words never hurt me, I knew that you spoke only truth."
Eisen tightened his arms, shaking his head. "Your thoughts are important to me, Yasuaki. If there's one thing I can trust, it's that you never lied to make me feel better." He raised his face, smiling at his partner. "You make me stronger by your honesty. Everyone else means well, but they don't really expect very much from me.. You remind me that I should be stronger, to protect the things that matter most, with my own hands."
He sighed in contentment, relaxing against the priest's warmth. Yasuaki nodded slightly, resuming his gentle strokes against his lover's back. "I understand," He whispered, settling into the monk's hold. "I promise that I won't lie to you, Eisen. If there's anything you should know, I'll always tell you.." He yawned quietly, chuckling at himself. "This is very comfortable.." He murmured.
Eisen nodded sleepily, nestling his face into the older man's throat. "Mhm.." He agreed, pressing a soft kiss to the skin there. "Love you, Yasuaki.." His whispered endearment faded into a quiet sigh, his breathing even and deep as he dozed. For several moments, the priest simply smiled, finally closing his eyes and gathering the smaller man close.
"And I you, Eisen. Always."
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Well, that's that! This chapter was difficult, moreso than I thought it would be. Look forward to more in the next few weeks, I'm pretty sure that this series will end at 10 ^_^ Ja ne!
A Haruka Naru Toki No Naka De Fanfiction
By SailorLight22
Chapter 7 - Reciprocation
I do not own these wonderful bishies, only the plot to this ficlette.. My first Haruka fic, should i continue? XD ANY replies would be appreciated, be easy though, k?
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WARNINGx2! This chapter contains is pretty much nothing but Adult Material! While I'm sure no one minds, I wanted to warn you!
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Yasuaki sighed, enjoying the warmth of his companion's body.
Tightening his grip, he moved quickly, rolling them over. Leaning down, he gently nipped at his partner's neck, his hand sliding down to stroke him again. Eisen moaned, shivering at the feeling. "It's so good, like that.." Yasuaki nodded, sucking lightly on the lobe of his ear.
"Very good," He murmured, his voice teasing. "I see what you meant, about being able to enjoy pleasing your lover.. It is a good feeling, to know that they want you.." He shifted slightly, his lips moving down the side of his partner's throat. "Do you, Eisen? Do you want any of the things you heard today, with me? Don't be afraid to tell me what you liked, what you wondered about.."
Eisen gasped, embarrassment and excitement competing for dominance within him at the husky tone of his lover's words. Closing his eyes, he moaned as the older man removed his hand, grasping his hips and pulling his body up to press against his own. He leaned forward, his hands slipping beneath the smaller man's back to support his weight as he rocked slowly against him.
"Is this right, Eisen? When I did it before, you were so loud.." He sighed, remembering. "The sound you made.. I thought I had hurt you. But it didn't hurt at all, did it? It felt so good that you couldn't help yourself." He smiled, kissing his partner's reddened cheek. "I want to make you feel like that, over and over until you beg me to stop." He slowed his movements, biting down gently on his speechless partner's shoulder. "I want to make you feel so good that you can't bear it, Eisen.. I want to hear you scream like that again."
Eisen whimpered, biting his lip. He couldn't believe that Yasuaki was saying these things, without even the slightest hint of self-consciousness, and he couldn't believe that it was affecting him like this. The thought of doing those things alone was enough to bring a blush to his face, but the way his partner said it... He didn't doubt for a moment that the older man meant every word, that he was more than willing to do exactly as he said.
Gasping, he arched up, his knees shaking. Yasuaki moaned quietly against his throat, sliding one hand beneath the soft fabric of his sleepwear. Eisen let out a startled squeak at the feeling of his partner's hand on his skin, his long fingers tugging insistantly at the knotted tie of his underclothes. "May I?" He murmured, leaning up to face his flustered lover. "Please let me touch you.."
The younger man nodded hesitantly, his eyes wide. "Yasuaki... Are you sure that you're all rightwith this? What you're doing is wonderful, but..." He faltered, gazing up at his face. The expression there was one of hope, slightly pleading and sincere. He nodded again, closing his eyes. "Please, if that's what you want..."
The priest leaned in, kissing him softly before replying. "Do you want it? I would give you everything, anything that you need.. You haven't refused, but neither have you accepted, Eisen. I would never force you."
The almost saddened voice brougth tears to the monk's eyes, his hands clutching his partner's shoulders as he forced them back. "You.. think I don't want you? I didn't mean for you to think that, Yasuaki! That isn't right, you aren't forcing me to do anything.. I want you, and I want this.." He blushed fiercely. "Everything you said was so.. I just don't know what to say to you, there isn't a word that describes what this feels like."
He shuddered, shaking his head. "I.. I can't think of anything that I want more than this. Please, I'd stop you if I didn't want it Yasuaki." He smiled, closing his eyes. "You're right, about before. When you moved like that, it felt so good that I thought I might die. It made me want so much more, things that I didn't even know existed until now.. It was an empty feeling, like something was missing. Now that I know, everything will be all right."
He stroked his hands down the older man's sides, pulling their bodies together. "Please, do that again.. Make me lose myself, even for a little while?" He whispered, shifting his hands to his lover's waist. He pressed his shoulders to the floor for leverage, lifting his hips in open invitation. Feeling the evidence of the older man's renewed arousal, he whimpered pleadingly. "I need to feel you on my skin.."
Yasuaki gasped sharply at his soft words, tightening his hold on the younger man. "Yes," He said, moving his hands from beneath to above as he untied the sash of his lover's short robe. "I want that too.." He pushed the material aside, ghosting his hand over the softness beneath. Reaching up, he gripped the smaller man's shoulders, lifting him just enough to slide his arms from the short sleeves. He set the garment aside, lowering his head to the blushing monk's chest. Inhaling the slight fragrance of him, he pressed slow kisses to his skin, his lips almost worshipful.
Eisen sighed, wrapping his arms around his partner. "I love you.." He murmured, shivering as the priest found a particularly sensitive spot. "Don't ever doubt that I want you, Yasuaki.. I just can't think when I'm so close to you, feeling like this makes me so happy that I can't express it with words."
Yasuaki smiled. "Then don't use them," He said, breath warm on his lover's stomach. "If words fail you, just let them go and show me.." He mouthed a trail across the smaller man's skin, pausing to lap at one pale nipple. Eisen gasped in surprise, the quiet sound breaking into a moan as his partner sucked lightly before turning his attention to the other side, drawing his tongue over the sensitive skin.
Feeling his shivers, the older man sighed contentedly as he resumed his exploration. Sliding back, he traced the curve of one hip with his palm, his motions gentle and unhurried. "So soft," He murmured, stroking the inside of his partner's thighs. "I remember how it felt, to have you wrapped around me.." He turned his head, kissing the bend of one knee. "You were so warm, and every time you moved with me I wanted more.."
He smiled, shaking his head. "I was afraid that I might do something wrong, but I just couldn't get enough of you. Even now, I want to have you like that again."
Eisen whimpered, nodding quickly. "I..I know.." He gasped, closing his eyes. "You don't have to be afraid, it was perfect." Blushing, he smiled. "I didn't want it to end, but it felt so good that I couldn't stop.."
Leaning forward, Yasuaki shifted his weight carefully until he could reach his partner's hand. Tugging gently, he urged him to rise. Still kneeling, he embraced him tightly, smoothing his hands over the skin of his lover's back. "I don't want to rush you," He whispered, kissing him slowly. "If you want to stop, tell me. I wouldn't be upset with you.."
Eisen shook his head. "I don't want to stop, Yasuaki. I'm willing to give you anything, if there's something you need from me.." He smiled, shyly. "What do you need? Do you need me to hold you like that, close enough to feel everything?" He leaned back, pulling the older man down. Shifting his knees, he pressed his legs tightly against the man's waist, fitting their bodies together. "You were there, and then you moved and it felt so..good," He shivered, rocking up in imitation.
Yasuaki gasped, moaning softly as his partner repeated the motion, the feeling of his bare skin intensifying the familiar sensation. "Is that what you need, Yasuaki?" Eisen whispered, closing his eyes. "I love this feeling, so warm.." He lowered one hand, taking hold of his partner's. Tugging gently, he guided their joined hands down, pressing the stunned priest's palm to himself with a quiet whimper. "Please, touch me.."
Yasuaki complied, fondling him slowly. Hearing the younger man's encouraging murmurs, he shivered, tracing the edge of his undergarment until he located the loose knot that secured it. He paused, meeting his lover's gaze steadily. While there were traces of lingering anxiety, his eyes held no fear, only silent pleading. Drawing a breath, he pulled gently at the slender cord, feeling it give way beneath his shaking fingers. Still watching the other's face, he pushed the material aside, slipping his hand beneath it to touch the silken hardness there.
Eisen gasped, his eyes wide at the almost shocking pleasure he felt. He couldn't believe that something so simple could feel so good, that the lightest touch of his partner's hands could make him want so many things.. He arched into the contact, his face heating at his own wanton actions. "Yasuaki.!" He gasped, closing is eyes as he felt the man resume his slow strokes, "Please..Please don't-!" He moaned, his hands clutching the abused blankets as he struggled to convey his need. "It feels.. so good!" He managed, panting.
His partner shifted, leaning down to kiss him hungrily. His quiet groan was silenced by the older man's insistent mouth, his tongue demanding entry that was eagerly granted. Eisen almost sobbed as he felt the priest shudder against him, his breath harsh as he pulled away. "Is this enough? I want to give you what you need, Eisen," He said, his voice breaking. The monk shook his head, his eyes shut tight with embarassed urgency.
"Not just me.. I want you to feel like this too! I..I think we should.." He stammered, biting his lip. "Do you want me? I'll let you.." He averted his face, feeling his partner's eyes on him. "If you want to do it like that, I'm not afraid.."
Yasuaki groaned at the offer, his hands sliding up to his lover's flaming cheeks. Cradling his face, he kissed him again, urging him to relax. Pulling slightly back, he waited for the younger man to open his eyes before speaking. "I don't want to hurt you, Eisen," He whispered. "I do want you, so much that it frightens me." He shook his head, his voice intense. "The very thought of being inside you..Making you mine.." He shuddered, closing his eyes. "It's enough to drive me mad. I..I don't think I could control myself, Eisen. I could hurt you, and..!" He gasped, opening his eyes as he felt the other man's hands on his shoulders.
"I trust you," Eisen whispered, pleadingly. "I know you wouldn't hurt me, Yasuaki.. I want to be yours, please let me give you that much.." He wrapped his arms around the taller man, pulling him down again. "When we were..together before, I thought that there was nothing more I could give you." He paused, shaking his head. "I meant for you to have all of me. If I hadn't been ready then, maybe I would be afraid of this." He smiled. "I'm not afraid because I decided that this is what I want. There's no one else for me, Yasuaki..If you don't want this, I won't ask again. I'll wait forever if I have to."
Yasuaki returned his embrace, shaking his head. "I wouldn't make you wait, Eisen. If you truly want that with me, all you need to do is ask. My only wish is to give you happiness.."
The younger man sighed, stroking his partner's hair. "I want it, Yasuaki.. I've thought about it, how it would feel.. I want you to take me, just like I wanted it before. That's why I felt so strange, I wanted to feel you in me.." He blushed, shivering. "Please, do you want that too?"
Yasuaki nodded ferverently. "Yes, very much.. I'm afraid of hurting you, but I want to try it, to see if I can make you feel the same thing I felt when you put your mouth on me, like you're going to lose your mind." He paused, rising just enough to rest their foreheads together. 'What was it, the word that fool of a General used?' He sighed, struggling to think in his impassioned haze.
"I don't want to think of him right now, but if nothing else, Tachibana was right about something.." He smiled, closing his eyes as he nestled against the heat of his partner's body. "I want to do this with you, to feel you shaking under me when we move.. I want to hear every sound you make, and know that you feel so very good, because of me." He lowered his voice, whispering softly to his fiercely blushing lover. "I want to do just as he said, Eisen.. I want to make you scream my name when you come.."
The younger man gasped, his mind reeling at the priest's blatant admission. He bit his lip, shaking his head even as a broken whimper escaped him. Forcing his thoughts into some semblance of order, he tried to reply. His voice came out strained, shaky with need. "Gods, Yasuaki.." He laughed giddily, unable to stop himself. "It already feels like I'm losing my mind, just listening to you say something like that.. Please, do whatever you wish. I need you, so much that it aches.." He shivered with nerves, unable to fight down the rising heat that accompanied his own words.
"I..I have something.. that we need, I keep it for my hands in the winter.. If you want me to..?" He stammered, his face burning. His partner nodded slowly, understanding what he meant.
"Where?" He murmured, stroking the monk's cheek gently. Wordlessly, Eisen gestured towards his right, at a finely crafted chest nearby. Yasuaki lifted himself carefully, moving just enough to reach the unlocked lid. Opening it, he saw a glass bottle of pale liquid, and several small trinkets. Taking the bottle, he closed the chest before returning to his place between his beloved's parted knees. He sat the fragile container close by, leaning down to kiss the younger man. "I won't do this if it hurts you, Eisen," He said, meeting the other's eyes. "Please, will you promise to stop me if you feel pain?"
The seriousness of his voice left no room for refusal. Eisen nodded, his face still warm. "I promise.. I think it may feel strange at first, because Tachibana-san said it might, but if it truly feels unpleasant, I'll tell you."
The priest smiled, his hands moving over his lover's chest. "That is all I ask, Eisen. Tell me..everything." He sighed, trailing his fingers down the soft skin of the other's stomach. "Beautiful," He whispered, "More than anything in this world.."
The younger man moaned, ignoring the slight tickle. He let his hands tangle loosely in the strands of his partner's hair, which fell forward as the man bent his head to drop soft kisses against his hip. "Not anything, Yasuaki," He said, smiling. "But thank you."
The priest nipped him, chuckling when he squeaked. "Don't be modest."
Eisen mumbled something under his breath, nodding.
Yasuaki shifted back, running his palms up the monk's legs. Reaching down, he carefully pulled the bottle's stopper out, tipping a generous amount of the slightly chilly substance into his hand. Sitting the open container safely on the floor, he spread the oil over his hands, warming it as he did. The faint scent of it was pleasant, reminding him of almonds.
He took a breath, relaxing as much as possible. "Are you ready, Eisen? I'll take as much time as you need.." His partner shivered, but nodded.
"You don't have to worry, Yasuaki.. I know that I need to let you do this, and I have to try to stay calm. Please?" The older man sighed quietly in relief, cupping his hand over his lover gently. Feeling the monk's faint shudder, he smiled, his touches slow and deliberate.
After a moment, he lowered his hand until he felt the warm skin of his partner's opening against his fingers. He murmured reassuringly, spreading the slippery liquid over it before pressing the tip of his finger inward. Seeing no sign of pain on his lover's face, he continued, pausing only when he felt slight resistance. Glancing up, he saw the younger man bite his lip, and he slid his finger back before pressing forward steadily. The monk gasped quietly, shivers travelling up his body.
Feeling him relax again, Yasuaki continued his slow movements, gradually adding more oil as he inserted a second finger. Eisen whimpered, releasing his partner's hair to free his hands. He panted softly, his eyes squeezed shut. "Yasuaki.." He breathed, shifting imperceptibly. "It.. it feels.. Please?" He moved hesitantly, urging the priest to go on.
The older man moaned quietly in acknowledgement, resuming his gentle strokes. The pliant feeling of his partner's heated flesh was maddening, but he forced himself to be patient. His fingers brushed against a small ridge inside of his lover, and he heard the man gasp loudly before shuddering. Alarmed, he withdrew slightly. "Did I hurt you?" He demanded, searching the smaller man's face intently.
The monk shook his head firmly. "No, it didn't hurt at all.. It was odd, but it felt good.. Would you.." His voice faltered, a startled moan cutting his request short as the older man curled his fingers against that place again. Gasping for breath, he pressed back against his partner's hand pleadingly, his own hands clenched in the bedding beneath them as Yasuaki increased his pace slightly.
"Like that?" He murmured softly, "Do you like the way it feels, Eisen?" He shivered at the other man's almost desperate cries, his heart pounding with growing excitement. Carefully, he added one last digit, twisting his hand to stretch his partner's entrance as well as possible for the next step. "Gods, I want you.. Are you ready for more?"
Eisen bucked, his legs shaking. "Yes.." He whimpered, breathlessly. "I need you, please!" His face burned at the words, and he knew that he must sound like a harlot, begging for his partner's touch. The feeling of embarrassment was nothing compared to the raw desire he felt, and it was quickly discarded at the almost painful emptiness left behind as his lover withdrew his hands.
Yasuaki reached for the bottle once more, carefully gathering the sweet-scented oil in his palm before replacing the stopper. Forcing himself to remain calm, he coated himself thoroughly, gasping at the slick warmth of his hand. Biting his lip, he knelt between the younger man's legs, feeling his slight tremors as he urged his knees up. Meeting those wide eyes, he leaned down, speaking quietly in what he hoped were reassuring tones. "Don't let me hurt you, tell me to stop if it isn't right.." He murmured, sighing when his lover nodded.
"I promise," He whispered, pleadingly. "Please, don't be afraid anymore. I want this.." He begged, casting off his shame as he relaxed his tight hold on the blanket. "I want to feel you, let me?"
Yasuaki smiled, shaking his head. "Always, Eisen." He lowered his still-wet hand, spreading the remaining liquid over his partner before pressing forward slowly, alert for the smallest sign of discomfort. Eisen drew a quick breath, closing his eyes at the sensation of being stretched. There was no real pain, only a slight burning that dulled with the passage of several moments.
The feeling of his lover's body around him was electric, and Yasuaki struggled to control the urge to simply bury himself as deeply as possible within that resiliant heat. Certain that his beloved was unharmed, he moved again, moaning softly as he felt the smaller man grip his shoulders. Feeling resistance, he paused. "Are you all right?" He whispered, shifting his weight. "I can wait until you're ready.." He gasped, shivering as his partner raised his hips to draw him in. "Ei..Eisen!" He froze, terrified that the sudden movement could have been painful for his lover.
The younger man hissed quietly, his fingers tightening on his partner's shoulders. When he caught his breath, he opened his eyes to gaze up at the taller man, smiling. "It's.. It's fine, I didn't mean to upset you.. I just wanted.." He shifted his hips, holding his breath. "It feels strange, but there's no pain. Do you..like it?"
Yasuaki nodded jerkily, holding himself firmly in check. "Yes..It feels..Gods, there's no word to describe it. I want to.." He broke off, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I should have more control than this." He murmured. Closing his eyes, he pulled away, stilling instantly when his partner whimpered.
"Please don't wait! When you moved just then, it felt.." He shivered, pressing his lifted knees against the older man's hips. "It was good, don't stop.." His voice was low, but clear. Sensing his lover's hesitation, he raised his hips, wracking his scattered thoughts for something to convince the man to continue.
"You said to tell you if it hurts, didn't you? The wanting hurts more than anything we've done.." He closed his eyes, shaking his head. "I told you that I'll wait, Yasuaki. We can try again when you trust me not to lie to you."
The older man gasped. "It isn't like that, Eisen! I know you wouldn't lie.." He trailed off, biting his lip. "I love you," He whispered, resting his head against the smaller man's shoulder. "I couldn't control myself before, and this feels so much better.." He moved, pressing forward gently before withdrawing again. "I didn't know that I could have caused you pain, Eisen.. All I could think about was how good it felt, to be with you like that." He rocked forward, inhaling sharply.
"You see? Even now, it's too much. You should be telling me to stop.." He lifted his head, feeling the smaller man shake. "What is it? I didn't mean to.." His voice faltered, and he stared down at his partner's wide-eyed face aprehensively. "Eisen, tell me what's wrong!" He whispered urgently.
Eisen shook his head, swallowing loudly before attempting to speak. "There's nothing wrong, Yasuaki.." He replied, still trembling. "I understand that you're worried, but you shouldn't be." Slowly, he arched his body upwards, whimpering quietly. "You don't understand at all.." He allowed his back to straighten before lifting himself again, moaning brokenly as he heard the taller man's answering gasp at the feeling. "Every time you move, it's.. Oh!" He cried out in surprise, his fingers digging into his partner's biceps as the priest shifted his hips.
Startled, Yasuaki repeated his slow movements, watching his lover's face intently. The younger man lifted his body to meet him, his breathing hitched. "I don't want you to stop! This isn't something that you should keep control of, Yasuaki.." He slipped a hand up to the older man's nape, drawing him down.
"Please," He murmured, kissing his partner briefly before pulling away. "Don't be afraid to let go.." Tightening his grip, he hooked his foot around the priest's thigh, holding him close as he rocked his hips. "It doesn't hurt, I promise." He said, closing his eyes. "I can't believe how good you feel, Yasuaki.. Doesn't it feel good to you, being so close..?" He released his grip on the priest's back, hands trailing down to his waist. "It felt so good... Please, do it like that again?" He whispered, blushing.
Yasuaki nodded, still wary of his inexperience. He pulled back, gasping at the feeling of his lover's warmth. Bracing himself, he allowed his partner a moment to relax before beginning to move, his anxiety fading as the smaller man tightened his hold. "Is this right?" He asked, resting his weight on one arm. "Or should I.." He slipped the other arm beneath the younger man's hips, adjusting the angle of his body slightly.
Eisen moaned breathlessly, nodding. "Yes, anything... You feel...Yasuaki!" He cried, arching up as the priest raised him higher, feeling him thrust against the same place he'd found before. The older man gasped, surprised by his desperate voice.
"Like this?" He whispered, repeating the movement. The reaction was immediate, his partner's fingers clenching almost painfully against his skin as he moaned.
"Yes!" He panted harshly, wrapping his legs around his lover's waist. "There!" His voice shook as he cried out, feeling his partner move away. "Yasuaki, please!" The priest nodded eagerly, leaning close in reassurance.
"Whatever you need, Eisen.. I told you," He rocked his hips, feeling the smaller body shudder in his arms. "This is what I wanted you to feel, so good that you can't think." He pulled his lover close, increasing his pace. "You feel incredible, Eisen.. This heat, Gods, I can't believe how hot you are.." He smiled, seeing the effect of his quiet words. "Open your eyes, Eisen.. Look at me?"
The younger man complied, forcing himself to meet his partner's smouldering gaze. "Yasuaki.." He whimpered, his eyes hazed. "I think..!" Words became too much as the older man moaned raggedly, nodding.
"I know," He gasped, his movements becoming more insistant even as he spoke. "I can feel it, you're almost..there," He whispered, his thrusts turning forceful. "Please, Eisen..I want it, come for me?"
His partner shuddered, unable to reply. Releasing his hold on the priest's waist, he slipped his hands up to the older man's shoulder's, pulling him down to his elbows. The slight change in position drew a cry from them both, and Eisen locked his arms, arching to meet the downward slide of his lover's body. "Yasuaki!" He sobbed, "I'm ready..! Please, with me..Now!"
Growling in reply, the priest cast off his restraint, his thrusts erratic as the smaller man rose to meet them, his tight hold on the older man's shoulders the only thing that kept him from sliding backwards on the tangled sheets.
Feeling his partner arch up sharply, Yasuaki groaned, his own release overtaking him as he heard his name echo through the darkened room. Panting, he supported himself on his elbows as he lay his head against his lover's chest, the rapid beat of his heart slowing as they both sighed.
Stirring slightly, Eisen lifted a still-shaking hand to his partner's hair, stroking him in long, lazy movements. "Are you all right?" He whispered, smiling tiredly at the man's mumbled reply.
"Gods, Eisen.." He laughed quietly, lifting his head to reguard the smaller man's amused face. "I should be asking you the same question. Are you?" The monk laughed in response, tightening his embrace.
"If by 'all right' you mean happy, exhausted, relaxed and completely in love, then yes, I'm quite 'all right', Yasuaki." The priest shook his head, smiling.
"Thank you, my Isshiki.." Eisen laughed at the endearment, closing his eyes sleepily. Yasuaki lifted himself, drawing away with a wince as the younger man relaxed his tight hold. Feeling the damp stickyness between them, he searched the room quickly with his eyes, seeing the monk's washbasin atop a low table nearby. Reluctant to move, he sighed before rising quickly, retrieving the basin and the cloth that lay beside it.
Gently, he drew the soft material over his lover's skin, laughing quietly as the other mumbled in protest at the coolness. Once his lover was clean, Yasuaki rinsed the cloth and saw to himself, shivering at the cold water. Rinsing the cloth one last time, he set the basin aside, lying beside his almost dozing partner. After several moments of contented silence, Eisen stirred, arranging the blankets over them and curling tightly against the older man.
"I love you," He murmured, sighing as he felt the priest's arm encircle him and tug him close. "Promise me something, Yasuaki?"
The man nodded, waiting.
"Promise that you won't regret this? I don't think I could stand it, knowing that you wanted to take it back.."
Yasuaki shook his head, holding the smaller man to his chest in denial. "Never, Eisen. If I were to regret anything, it would be the time you spent waiting for me." He smiled. "I can't believe that you did that, just set aside your pain and your fears, waiting for something that might never have come." He stroked the monk's back, torn between a sob and a laugh. "It humbles me, to think of you being so patient and constant. I don't deserve your devotion, Eisen.. In the past, there must have been times that I hurt you, without knowing it..."
He would have continued, but a muffled protest stopped his self-disgust in midthought. "No more! I don't care about that, Yasuaki. In the past, you were the same as you are now. If there was something that needed to be said, you said it. Your words never hurt me, I knew that you spoke only truth."
Eisen tightened his arms, shaking his head. "Your thoughts are important to me, Yasuaki. If there's one thing I can trust, it's that you never lied to make me feel better." He raised his face, smiling at his partner. "You make me stronger by your honesty. Everyone else means well, but they don't really expect very much from me.. You remind me that I should be stronger, to protect the things that matter most, with my own hands."
He sighed in contentment, relaxing against the priest's warmth. Yasuaki nodded slightly, resuming his gentle strokes against his lover's back. "I understand," He whispered, settling into the monk's hold. "I promise that I won't lie to you, Eisen. If there's anything you should know, I'll always tell you.." He yawned quietly, chuckling at himself. "This is very comfortable.." He murmured.
Eisen nodded sleepily, nestling his face into the older man's throat. "Mhm.." He agreed, pressing a soft kiss to the skin there. "Love you, Yasuaki.." His whispered endearment faded into a quiet sigh, his breathing even and deep as he dozed. For several moments, the priest simply smiled, finally closing his eyes and gathering the smaller man close.
"And I you, Eisen. Always."
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Well, that's that! This chapter was difficult, moreso than I thought it would be. Look forward to more in the next few weeks, I'm pretty sure that this series will end at 10 ^_^ Ja ne!