Hellsing Fan Fiction ❯ Hellsing Goes American ❯ Excuses Excuses! ( Chapter 38 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Chapter 38: Excuses Excuses!






"And what, prey tell, is your excuse for leaving Sir Fransis Bijou to sit and wait for you all night? You will forfiet your right to choose if you do not have a reasonable excuse, remember?"

Candy rolled her eyes at the pompus ass in front of her "I'm so sorry! I was buisy being blown up by a hand grenade that was thrown into my office!" She said in an innocent 'I had no idea' voice, full of sarcasm.

He gave her a funny look, not beleving her due to the fact she was still in one piece. She sat back and sighed, pissed that she was having to use the confrence room as a temporary office. The chairs in here were so uncomfortable!

The old fart smiled at her in victory. "We'll hold a meeting to decide whom would be a suitable match for you."

"Or you could shove it up your ass." she mumbled to herself, holding her head in pain. Damn headaches! Why'd that damn wall have to fall on her like that and screw up her neck? While we're at it, why the hell do those muscles always refuse to fix themselves like the others did?

"Excuse me?"

"Look, what will it take to prove I'm tellin' the truth? Huh? You want to see my office? You want to ask Alucard and Father Anderson what happend? Let them tell you how fucked up I was? Or you want me to rip my damn arm off, right here and now so you can see how it fucking reataches itself? I am sick of having to go out with these fucking pussies you've chose for me. Even mention any form of violence and they run screaming like little girls. How the fuck do you expect someone like that to run an organization that kills things on a daily basis?" She was sure the entire mansion could hear her screaming at the man, but she didn't care. She smiled to herself as the man stepped back in fear.

He stutered as he tried to think of something to say. "Bu bu bu.. What?" she mocked him. "You want to see me rip my arm off? Okay!" She never gave him a chance to say anything before she grabbed her upper arm and, with a bit of effort, tore her left arm off.

His eyes grew huge in shock at what he just saw. Blood was spurting out of her shoulder with every beat of her heart as the torn flesh hung and dripped blood down her side, puddling at her feet, the arm in her hand still twitching. She had a psychodic look in her eyes as she watched her arm twitch.. "Ooh! Look at that! Twitchy-twitchy!" She shook it a bit, making it twitch a bit more before bursting out in a fit of insaine laughter.

He gaged at the sight as she fell back into her chair laughing and still playing with the arm, making it bounce around like a little girl would do a doll. He about jumped out of his skin as a second voice chimed in and laughed with her.

He watched in horror as the Hellsing Pet came through the wall and stood behind her, taking the arm from her as he laughed. "And after all that trouble we went through to put you back together!" He stuck her arm back in place and held it there until enough of the muscle and tendons had repaired to hold it on itself.

"I'm sorry, Babe... But it got rid of my headache!" she chirped happily, gaining herself a hug and kiss from the monster.

They both turned their attention to the door as the man ran out, covering his mouth to try and keep from throwing up. "What's his problem?" Candy had a hard time not laughing at how serious Alucard sounded.

"No idea... Hey! Let's go play with our toys in the basement!" She bounced in excitement at the idea. She just loved the sounds they made during their games!

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Alucard had an idea and turned one of the toys into a goul before strapping it down to an old examination table. Candy watched as he set up a tray of sergical tools as he waited for the man to fully turn, examining each piece to make sure it was as sharp as possible.

Once he was satisfied he turned to her with a smile, "Time for a lesson on Vampire anatomy!" A big smile spread across her face as she jumped out of her seat and bounced happily to his side. He gave her a kiss before picking up a scalple and cutting the goul open, straight down it's chest and stomach. The cut wasn't perfect, but good enough. He wasn't a sergion and the damn thing wouldn't stop wiggling. But it did make such a wonderful sound as it was being sliced open!

He pulled the skin back and used some clamps on the edges of the table to hold it out of the way, then cut through the muscles and pried apart the ribcage. Now the lesson could begin!

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A young French man was waiting in the parlor for the represintative of the council to return to let him know of her excuse. He had just gotten a refill on his tea when the most gut-wrenching sound billowed from the basement. He looked to the buttler, who looked slightly disturbed, for an explenation. "Trust me, you don't want Miss Candice. She is.. insaine and.. extremely sadistic." He fought for the right words to discribe his new boss. "And that's a major under statement... She and the family pet are also quite attached to one another, and I asure you; you do not want to get him angry at you." A shiver ran down the old buttler's spine at the thought of the Vampire pissed off.

Sir Fransis Bijou scoffed at the older man. "Afraid of a little pet? What is it? A German Shepard, Golden Retriever, Rotwriler?" "Vampire." He looked at the old man, convinced he'd gone crazy himself before laughing and heading down to the basement to see what the noise was. Probably some servant slacking off and watching a horror movie.

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Candy's head fell onto her lover's shoulder as they both gasped for breath. Who knew school could be so fun?

Neither of them noticed when the door creaked open, the noise hidden by the screams and crying of the toys as they hung or sat chained to the walls, celing, and floor.

The young French man froze at the sight. Men in various states of agony lined the dank, smelly room, crying and begging for help. One man had a strange device around his neck with metal prongs sticking into his chest, just above the collar bone, and under his jaw, holding his head up at a strange angle because he wouldn't stop trying to gnaw his arms off to get away. Another was squished in a small cage with barely enough room for him to fit. Another was chained to a wall, hanging by his wrists, his legs severed at diferent lengths and turning a discusting color from infection, the rest of his body marred by burns. There were several more, but he couldn't look at them, it was too horid! But there in the middle of it all was a man straped down to a table, his insides strown about the room and his potential wife sitting naked in another man's lap, both of them covered in blood and other bodily fluids from their victums.

He only got a few steps back away from the door before throwing up. She really was fucked up! Once he stopped vomiting he took off to go to the nearest church to pray for those men's souls and that he wouldn't have too many nightmares from seeing that. There was no way in hell he was sticking around there, he might be next! And a church was the safest place to be if that man really was a Vampire, right?

Walter sighed as he opend the door just in time to let the man out. He didn't even bother getting in the car, just kept on running.