InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Forbidden Pain ❯ Chapter 10

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Yo. Insert disclaimer crap. Read on. Sorry about the delay, midterms.

Guess last chapter was bad then or something. Oh well. Know what to do with

your questions, comments and concerns. Nothing for sure is determined yet so

there's still time to voice your opinion on previous things I've said. Not a lot of

action, but hey, it's necessary for the plot to go on.

Chapter 10

Sitting down in a field of sweet grass Yoko took care of Kagome then took

care of himself. Yusuke opted to stay awake but didn't tell anyone that he

actually woke two hours before the rest. Smiling to himself he then noticed

Kagome was gone. Slightly annoyed, but his fault for going asleep, he spoke

seeing Yoko give him a look upon waking up. Time to test those lying skills.

“She left to go clean herself.”

“You should have stopped her. She'll tear open everything again.”

“Well she wanted to get `that' scent out and off of her, so, I thought it was

best in all…”

Yoko sighed sitting against a rock. “How long ago did she leave then.”

Wow, he actually bought that. “An hour.”

Once clean, Kagome looked down at herself. The others clothing were

rags and barley covered her, so she didn't have anything else to wear yet.

Maybe she was a whore. She had sex with Yoko and left, then went straight to

Hiei and unknown to him wanted to kiss that prick. And apparently her youkai

already laid claim to Yoko, and let him know it. But she didn't want him any

longer…And for the life of her couldn't figure out why. Because she did at one

point. Utterly confused Kagome put her rag excuse for clothing back on and

heard the plant around her leg make a noise. Odded out she didn't want to

return just yet, but was confused to as why she wanted to return. She punched a

tree, pist, and stared off.

Was she her inner youkai? She knew that it was a part of her, but was it

her? Was her inner youkai what dominated and controlled her life? If so, then

she would have to go to Yoko, but it must not be true, because she didn't want

Yoko Kurama the spirit fox.

She wanted Hiei. Kagome punched the tree again. She didn't want to

want Hiei. She didn't want Yoko, but it wasn't her who wanted him for a mate

was it? It was her instincts. And yeah, she could admit to herself that she did

like, want Hiei, but her rational side knew it would be the worse mistake in her life

after being born. She didn't trust him at all, too many damn secretes and he was

a poser. She knew everyone had there secretes, she did, but not like Hiei. And

when she did trust him he blew it in her face the way he is or not, you don't do

that. His attitude complimented, strangely enough, hers, and they could tolerate

very well to be around each other, but she didn't want it.

Thinking it over Kagome figured that if she could train herself to be cold

and distant and how she is now from her ningen days, then she could get over

having some type of odd attraction towards Hiei. She could control that, not her

instincts. Once her inner youkai laid claim to Yoko…Even now staring off she

could hear it inside of herself. A problem in the future, but there would be

something that she hoped would appease everything she felt now. The original

plan. To be alone for the rest of her life, because if she did end up with Hiei,

Yoko, or someone, they would always be hated and in danger because of what

she was. But that wasn't why she kept people away, she hated them. That

hadn't changed since Sango and Miroku decided to kick her out and disown her.

Brother and sister her ass. She didn't need anyone to survive in this world, just

her strength and mind. And once this mission was over she would figure out a

way to kill, rip apart Koenma and be free of everyone again. That was the plan,

that was what was going to happen inner youkai claim or not. Showed that she

hadn't gotten her petty emotions in perfect check yet.

After calling herself a weakling for a while Kagome stared into the creek at

herself then walked off. `Keh. I don't even want to be around the forbidden bitch

that I am but I've over come that as well. Fuck it.'

“She hasn't come back yet.”

Yusuke sat still getting grilled by Yoko and Hiei. “Well Hiei what can I say,

I told you, you as well Yoko, that she went to clean her ass. I didn't want to force

her to give an estimated time so I guess she's still there, also because I can

sense her-“ Yusuke opened his compact turning it away from him. “What the

fuck you want toddler.”

Koenma was angry. “Yusuke, do not call me toddler.”

“Fine then baby speak.”

Koenma sighed, there was no helping him. “Let me speak to Kagome.

Her crystal went grey meaning her inner youkai was doing the talking, so I

presume there was a battle.”

“Muso is dead, we are injured, we are resting, do you have a purpose to

this call.”

“Yes I have a purpose Yusuke now give me Kagome now!”

Hiei had moved as fast as he could at the first sound of the compact and

brought Kagome back to the camp site in his arms since she couldn't walk really

despite her protest. She took the compact speaking.

“What.”

“If you have superb control over your thoughts and emotions then why is it

that your inner youkai was let out.”

Does everyone need to know that? “Bad injuries.”

“Still, you would have kept control. You will tell me the real reason so that

the mission is not hindered. And, I can tell if you are lying to me. The crystal will

turn bright yellow.”

“You lie.”

“Test it out then so you'll know first hand. Kagome, tell me what type of

youkai you are?”

“Fire and ice.”

“Truth, no change in current mood. Now Kagome, what's your favorite

food and movie?”

“I don't have one any longer-“

“-Fine damn loopholes what is your favorite star formation.”

“-I don't have one either-“

Koenma paused allowing her to see the crystal he had changed to yellow

outside of her current mood. “Youkai can sense lies but not when cleverly said.

Lie to me again Kagome and I will activate your crystal again. Now, tell me why

your inner youkai was in control.”

Kagome was pist as hell but kept the same emotion as she spoke with a

straight face. “Muso was about to kill Yoko and myself too, injured, my inner

youkai defended him.”

“Why.”

“Because she claimed him as her own.”

“Why is Yoko out anyway?”

“Because Shuichi's soul was stolen.”

“Very well, continue on then.”

Kagome tossed the compact gently at Yusuke after Koenma left and

decided to sit down under a tree closest to Yusuke and furthest from the others.

She knew all of them could figure out that she didn't care about Yoko, her inner

youkai did. Not her.

Tired, she couldn't force herself to stay awake any longer and went to

sleep. She made a resolve to herself, she did not need people and her inner

youkai would have to get over it, she ruled her, not the other way around. She

woke the next morning finding everyone asleep somehow, figuring they had put

Yusuke in charge again she left knowing she needed time to herself.

She walked out about thirteen days later hearing the rest completely one

hundred percent ready to go. Her leg was mended, but from the way Muso had

broken it she couldn't do a split or run properly with it yet, take a few more days.

Everything else was mainly fine and she wasn't pregnant. Even better. Her

inner youkai still bothered her, especially when they fought or when she hunted.

Apparently it wouldn't learn, meaning she would have to go find someone who

wouldn't want to kill her and ask. Except for…She didn't have any resources in

this time any longer, and in Tokyo everyone wanted her dead. She sighed as the

group headed out towards where Kurama had said he smelled a scent of Naraku

moving away from them, another trap. There was one resource that if true would

never abandon her, but just thinking of it made her pist in the end. Kogua. They

were headed north anyways, he would find them again, she didn't care about this

group she was forced to travel with. Kogua could help her, or at least find

someone who could help her. And if he didn't like her being forbidden she'd just

kill him. Things would work out then.

After about two weeks and the normal amount of youkai attacks they

came across a full pack of youkai wolves and ookami. She saw Ginta by his hair

and then saw him look up, sniff her direction and growl. Yusuke spoke.

“Why are they growling at us? We ain't doing a thing.”

“Unless she knows them or they know she's forbidden, it's because we're

in their territory - It's that same wolf again.”

Kogua ran up growling leaving his pack behind. His eyes were red.

“You will not best me twice youkai. Now, what have you done to her.”

Kagome spoke still same. “I am her-“

“- If you even deface her again I will rip your throat out after mauling you.”

Kagome for some reason didn't want to harm him. `Damnit. Guess I'm

not inherently a bad person then am I. How do I make Kogua understand that I

am Kagome.' “Why do you believe I am not her.”

“Because she was ningen, you are youkai. Her scent lingers faintly on

you, I will kill you.”

Kagome did the only thing she could think of that she knew Kogua would

recognize as her, in seeing as she accidentally taught it to him. She walked up

to him with her neck exposed knowing canine youkai knew it as a submissive

trait, looked away from his eyes and kissed him. Kogua's eyes immediately went

back to normal and he looked at her ignoring the extremely confused looks on

the other three's faces.

“Ka-Kagome?”

Kagome was still the same. “I've been trying to tell you that.”

Kogua gazed at her. “But the houshi and Tayjia - They said you were

dead - There was a tomb! How is this possible you area alive?” He barked

loudly at the wolves who knew Kagome shouting/barking nee chan for them to

stay back from running at her. “Please explain to me.”

Kagome sighed in her head. She would have to if she wanted his help.

She didn't want to tell those three so spoke.

“You can keep going.”

Yoko spoke cutting Hiei off. “We will wait.”

Hiei spoke again. “Who the hell is he.”

Kagome walked off towards the rest of his pack. “Then wait.”

Kogua didn't give her a moments alone as she sat, out of ear shot from

the others, and told them what happened leaving parts out that they wouldn't

understand or didn't need to know. After explaining why she was `dead' she

turned to Kogua.

“So do you want to kill me as well for being ice and fire.”

Kogua looked at her pained. “Kagome koi I am truly sorry. I had no idea

you were…You. I threatened to kill you - I fought you!”

Kagome sighed. “I've told you, don't apologize any longer. I don't blame

you Kogua.”

He gazed at her. “Thank you, again, still. You are just as beautiful as you

were before, it shines through your soul.”

Inner beauty eh? “Does that mean you think I was and am ugly.”

“Hell no you're even more attractive now that you're youkai, it's just… I

was first attracted to you because of your personality and who you are, not what

you are. It's the wolven way. Why we don't discriminate against forbidden

offspring and hanyou.” He laughed. “Most hanyou. By the way, I heard you

killed kuro. You okay?”

“I had to.” She looked down. The only thing that she feared would never

go away, she could never get over. “He aided in killing my son.”

Kogua and the rest of the wolves were hurt. “Shippo… Gomenazai.”

Kagome didn't want to think about it. “I have a favor to ask of you.”

“Anything Kagome koi.”

“My inner youkai has a situation that I can not get it to not bother itself with

any longer. I need to know if you know of a way or anyone who can help me with

it since I have tried everything to get rid of the problem.”

“Of course. What's wrong koi?”

“She has taken claim to a youkai that I myself have nothing towards in

wanting for a mate or even attractiveness and will not get over the fact.”

Kogua spoke. “It's that kitsune isn't it?”

“You're actually paying attention to your surrounding now. I have been

`dead' for far too long. What gave it away.”

“Well, the hi youkai was pist at me, while the kitsune looked grief struck

like he lost a mate or something. Did you like him at once?”

Kagome was impressed at how Kogua had matured and thought it made

his characteristics stand out more - Whoa…”It's, complicated…I don't even

know.”

“That's fine. Well, I don't know, but there is a ookami further north near

Ayame's pack that is wise and old. He'd probably know. I can take you and your

group that you're forced to be with there if you'd like?”

“Thank you Kogua.”

Kogua gave his trademark smile. “Turn into a cold youkai to protect

yourself and can't call me `kun' any longer?”

Kagome had to smile. Maybe shutting herself away, which never really

got her anywhere `cept more pain, wasn't the way. There goes resolves. Didn't

mean she had to be a damn pansy.

“I'll think about it.”

Kogua stood. “Accepted. Let's go pack. Give you all time to get

reintroduced with Kagome koi.”

Yoko calmed himself down. He didn't like it but there had to be a logical

explanation for everything that Kagome did. If she came back down from the

pack no longer in that ever persistent same `can't read a thing off of me and I am

cold keeping shit away' mood, then it was nothing. But even if just a little, then…

Yoko didn't know what to do if Kagome, Kagome, not her youkai, had found

someone else. He couldn't find another mate, his kind mated for life. All of him

wanted her for a mate. He was, oddly enough to some, her soul mate. But she

went up to him and kissed him… Yoko's tail was still limp. But he looked up in

seeing the wolves begin to come down. He felt his heart that never beat, lurch in

hearing what the pack leader called his love.

“Yeah yeah. Come on. Introduce the pack to your youkai bum associates

Kagome koi before they try eating them.”

Hiei felt his Jagan tinge and kept quiet as Kagome spoke, not rejecting the

koi. “Uremeshi Yusuke, Yoko Kurama, Hiei. You all, Kogua-“ She saw him grin

at her and she sighed. “-Kogua kun and pack.”

Yusuke looked wide eyed at him. “Kun?”

“I can speak slower if it helps if you're still adjusting. He is going to take

me to see an elder to resolve a situation that will deviate from Naraku.” Kagome

walked off with Kogua. “I don't care where you go.”

The three viewed Kagome's interactions with `Koga kun', `Ginta and

Hakaku' and the pack whom all called her sister. She was a bit different with

them, and her crystal faltered only so slightly that you had to be right up on it to

tell the difference. When they set down after two nights of travel Kogua noticed

something with Kagome and watched.

Kagome sat down after hunting alone and saw Yoko in the worst shape

that she had ever seen him in and for some reason it hurt her inside to see him

so. She wanted to go to him and her youkai screamed at her to make her go

towards him and comfort him, reassure him that she was his and his alone. But it

took everything in her not to listen to it. Sighing, she then felt Hiei's gaze on her

and saw him discreetly go off into the forest. Punching herself mentally she soon

found herself walking after him. She didn't even have control over herself.

“What.”

“Why do you allow that ookami to call you kibito.”

“If you want an answer, then why is it that I don't kill everyone who calls

me bitch or wench.”

“Because there would be too many corpus in the world.”

Kagome mentally smiled. “Besides that.”

Hiei looked at her. “Because, you don't care.”

Kagome sat next to him. “They're just words and you have to get used to

them. I'm surprised that was the first thing you asked about.”

“The kiss.”

“It was the only way he would know I was Kagome.”

“Meaning you had kissed the ookami before.”

She smirked. “Yes.”

“Hn.”

Kagome stood walking off. “Don't burn a whole in your band-“

“-Kagome.”

Kagome turned around. She saw him stand, hesitate, then walk forward

and put her against the tree and kiss her. Kagome moaned putting her arms

around his neck and felt Hiei hungrily deepen the kiss as he hiked up the kimono

she had acquired putting her up against the tree. She put her hands in his hair

grabbing fist fulls as Hiei felt her nip not leaving any mark at his neck then lick his

ear. He sucked on her neck leaving a very large hicky as he undid her obi taking

her out of her kimono, putting her back up against the tree kissing her-

Kogua gave a low growl approaching. “Get away from her, now.”

Hiei was pist enough for Kogua interrupting him about to claim her as his,

and was down right near enraged when he heard her sigh and cloth herself.

“Ookami you had better have a good excuse or I will kill you-“

“-You know I doubt anyone would know you weren't a hi youkai unless you

use your energy like that. Kagome koi.” Kagome walked off. “It's not an excuse

I have, it's a fact.”

“Which is.”

“One that can not be shared but it is best for you not to try doing so with

Kagome koi until after she goes to her destination.”

That calmed Hiei down enough not to reveal his Jagan. “What's wrong.”

Kogua walked off after Kagome. “Nothing that concerns you.” Kogua

found Kagome in a stream cleaning the scent off of her and turned. “Apparently

it's more than just your inner youkai then.”

Kagome sighed using a leaf. “I thought I had that one under control.”

“You thought you had your inner youkai under control as well too. What

attracts you to this youkai?”

“Just…Him. I don't know.”

“Well lucky for you, we're still going to see this elder. So go back, sleep

up, walk out, okay?”

In the morning Kagome ignored Hiei sticking with at least three wolves at

all times. Yoko too much in despair still, only Yusuke noticed it, and working on

not being so bunt approached Kagome.

“You okay?”

“If this is how you do not ask a direct question Yusuke then you still need

much help.”

Yusuke smirked. “I'm still learning.”

After about a week, when they stopped to sleep Kagome had gone to

bathe herself, a habit she still had as a ningen, and sensed Hiei approaching.

She didn't bother covering herself but was turned around in the water.

“I'm busy.”

“Why.”

“Because.”

“Give me an answer please.”

“You know I don't trust you so why should I-“

“-You would let me have sex with you leaving a claim wide for everyone to

see on you and you still have no trust for me?”

Kagome growled, she remembered how long it took for that claim to go

away and how long she had to stay in Kogua's presence or go straight to Yoko

trying to console him. “Your words now are truthful.”

“I don't understand - At least tell me why. Does it have to do with what

Kogua said.”

“I don't know what he said nor do I wish to know from you. To put it

bluntly, stay away from me Hiei. If you can not tell or were too busy doing other

activities, I do not want to be around you. Honor that or not, I know what needs

to be done.”

“But why.”

Kagome wasn't going to get pist or show emotion for this. She clothed

herself and walked back to rest.

“Get over it hi youkai and move on with your life.”

Questions? Concerns? Wondering why Kagome is seemingly bouncing around

with so many men? Libby1428@yahoo.com