InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Forbidden Pain ❯ Chapter 11

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

If you want to know what happens in the rest of this chapter gotta email or review. Not changing ratings. Still voting time. Kagome talks to the elder Kogua leads her to, then spends time with Yoko and Hiei.

Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Angst / Adventure | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 10.21.2005 | Pages: 8 | Words: 7.0K | Visits: 635 | Status: Completed

Yo! Remember how I said there would be a chapter that I wouldn't post all of the

way or something because of a three letter word: sex? Well this is it. So if you

want to know what goes on, there's a note at the bottom. Email or review and it's

sent to you.

And thanks to everyone who's reviewed and those not listed too.

Sexi3 Kagome67ner

Deathsangel4729

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Dumass…. (hey, whatever works. I don't judge)

Clarnietoza

Kogua noticed Kagome return, with Hiei, and stood ready to intervene if

necessary but heard the last sentence from Kagome. Glad, he sat back down

telling her to stay near him for her own good. When they made it to the mountain

the old ookami lived, all but Kogua and Kagome were told to stay at least an hour

back from his location. There was a den, very large and small at the same time.

Sitting on a rock was an old ookami white with age. He turned towards the two in

the mist of elevation and nodded his head.

“Kogua, with a forbidden child. What may I be of help with son of my old

friend who is no longer with us.”

“Tsunamote this is my dearest and closest friend Kagome koi.”

The old wolf raised a brow. “You call the young one koi? And of your

relationship to Ayame?”

Kogua spoke. “She knows I have been mated to Ayame for some time

now Tsunamote, she is in need of guidance only you are able to give.” Kogua

told her story. “And I ask on her behalf for your aid.”

Tsunamote turned to Kagome. “Child, this is true?”

“Yes dono.”

“Then I must say you have a large issue at hand. All youkai have an inner

youkai, then there is themselves. With you child, since you are from fire and ice

of great power, you also have fire and ice sides to yourself, and I am afraid that

with time unless merged, they will come to cause you not only mental anguish

such as now, but with time pain, physical as well. It is most important, and I am

truly sorry that I can not give you better wisdom, that you find a medium within

yourself or you will kill yourself. You were labeled forbidden because ice and fire

do not mix, and when it happens it is rare. It is pain.” Tsunamote was quiet for a

while. “Now. Your interactions with the forbidden male who is a hi youkai.”

“I had, some odd attraction towards him at one time, it went away easily,

but now…I can not explain it Tsunamote dono it is just that I wanted him, then.”

“I believe your fire side has found itself a mate young one. And perhaps

since before thinking of the hi youkai was not disappointment, your mind, though

how much you fight it, finds the hi youkai as a mate for you as well. And this

would be much easier to solve, if it weren't for the kitsune. Your inner youkai is

you in a way, and it will be very difficult to mate with another or even interact with

a potential mate against its wishes. Tell me, did you feel her when you were

about to have sex with the hi youkai.”

Felt like hell. “Hai.”

“Then I have a simple yet painful solution to your problems all in all.

Kogua knows of these males around you, my solution involves taming your ice

and fire halves, since most likely they will never come to accept each other. Until

your battle with Naraku is one day away as you can feel in your veins, realize

what tensions I can already sense you fighting inside with the other that you feel

is not winning at the time. Now you feel rage and pain for some reason unknown

to us and you as well, use its opposite. This will hurt. But if all is well, this will be

your last resort to saving your life. When you have come to control them, by that

time I assure you, that you will have your answers of a mate, or you will be

dead.” Tsunamote stood. “Kogua it was nice seeing you again.”

Kogua bowed. “Likewise.”

Heading down the mountain the meet up with the group and went to the

base of the mountain. Kagome stood in front of Kogua after the rest of the

wolves said and made their good byes.

“Do you remember what I said when first explaining.”

“Yeah, kinda hard to forget.” Kogua went up and hugged Kagome. “Don't

be a stranger Kagome koi. You're pack, remember?”

Kagome smiled very softly. “I won't.”

The four left back on the trail of Naraku noticing Kagome a bit sad, though

her crystal didn't show a thing. Actually only Yusuke noticed, Yoko still being

depressed and Hiei anx to get Kagome alone. He walked up besides Kagome as

they continued to walk. Yusuke spoke.

“You know Kagome, I don't know about mopey and horny, but I hope they

will still be once that is resolved. Besides, even if it never is, I'm still here.”

Kagome almost stopped and turned towards him. “How the hell -“

Yusuke smirked. “You told me to work on it, remember?”

Yoko spoke. “You do strongly take after your true father Yusuke.”

Yusuke smiled a bit at him. “Glad you still have vocal chords Yoko.”

Kagome smiled glad Yusuke couldn't see her. Her inner youkai was

content for a while in hearing Yoko speak. It had been far too long. But, she

couldn't get out of Yusuke noticing the different color her crystal took and spoke.

“So's Kagome. If this Raizen is still alive, when this is over with show me

to him if possible.”

When night came on the third day they rested and Yoko stood, then sat

back down. She wasn't his mate, she didn't want to be around him. He couldn't

help her, could he? Then why was his inner youkai telling him to go towards her

scent? Wait, he was his own inner youkai. One of the perks. The scent never

went away and he desperately wanted to do anything to make the scent go away.

Not only was it driving his nose mad it made him almost physically hurt each time

he smelled it, which was always. He was glad though Hiei and Yusuke had

weaker noses and couldn't smell it. Meaning he doubted she knew he could tell.

After ten days it did hurt him and he went to find Kagome under a tree sitting and

was heart broken.

Kagome sat head back eyes closed seemingly fine as she used her right

arm to burn her left arm. Without a second thought Yoko put his hands over her

arms quickly taking out the flames causing her to open her eyes a bit shocked

and looked at him as she spoke.

“Why did you do that?”

“You tell me why you did that. You were burning yourself, your own flesh

and liking it.”

Kagome looked down. “It…It doesn't hurt when I counteract.”

Yoko still stood. “I don't understand.”

“My fire and ice halves…They hurt even more now and sometimes I can't

even go until we stop at night to even it out. It's been bad, but now it keeps

getting worse. So if one side gets too powerful threatening to kill the other I calm

it down…Like, if my ice half is winning, then I burn myself, and if my fire half is

stronger, then I cut myself with an ice dagger.” Kagome looked down further. “I

can feel it. I knew you were even less happy then since, stuff, but then when you

kept receding I, I could feel you and if I would have known that you were able to

tell that I've been doing this then.” Kagome was at a lost for words. “I do not

want to cause you pain.”

Yoko was holding Kagome sitting down. He looked ahead. “You don't,

but the rest of Kagome only cares enough to calm you down and -“

Kagome growled. “Yoko how the hell do you think primal instincts could

talk like this. Been f'ing depressed to long.”

Yoko turned her around looking at her. “Kagome…”

“Yoko please, let me continue. If you wonder why I can't be around for

long periods of time before and seemingly longer now is because I don't have

another youkai I am comfortable to be around to balance and I'm not cutting

myself. Burning myself.”

“Why in part you kept Kogua so close.” Yoko nuzzled her. “Don't even if it

does- Why don't you want me to even touch you if you say that-“

“Because I can't think straight Yoko!” Her eyes were partially red. “I can't

even figure out if I want to a mate more or less you or Hiei.” She got out of his

hold and walked off. “So I want the both of you to leave me alone-“ Yoko stood

holding onto her burnt arm making her wince. “Damnit you don't understand-“

Yoko brought her around and kissed her holding her with her head down.

“What I understand is that you fail to understand that even if you do not want me

as a mate, I will always be there for you. So let me help you.”

Kagome spoke still head down in a very light whisper knowing Yoko could

still hear. “What if the type of help I want from you I don't want to leave Hiei hurt

with. Why I'd be fine without both but I know that it would be worse for the both

of you.”

Yoko nuzzled her. “I know you don't want to hurt us Kagome, but you're

only hurting yourself by doing this. And for as long as Shuichi has known the

Hiei now, he'd ether get over it with time or learn his place, but he would always

be there for you.”

Kagome wanted to kiss him, but was too short and just closed her eyes

hurt. “Then why is it that I feel bad doing even this.”

Yoko lent down kissing her. “Because no matter what you have made

yourself out to be because of others,” He kissed her again. “you are not bad

Kagome.” He grew a plant up underneath her so that she could do more. “You

are anything but.”

Kagome kissed him hesitantly then broke away. “I can't.”

Yoko moved in to kiss her. “But you just did-“

Kagome stopped him with her eyes. “-Yoko, I can't.” She looked down.

“No matter how much I want to.” Kagome sweetly kissed him then looked him in

the eye. “Even doing this is burning me up inside.”

Then Yoko understood it. “Your fire half wants to be mated to Hiei.”

“And I have come to realize that as much as my inner youkai is me,”

Kagome jumped down to the ground. “So is my ice half, and my fire half. They

all are me.” She made an ice dagger and slowly cut up the length of her right

arm until Yoko grabbed it from her meeting her `red' eyes. “Don't”

Yoko kissed her. “No.”

Kagome was still feral and pushed Yoko back growling. Yoko saw her tilt

her head to the side very confused then went up to him licking his chest where

she could reach and felt hurt and Yoko took steps away from her. And it hurt him

to see her that way. When her eyes went back to her normal red, he saw the

hurt and confusion all over her face as she went up to him walking on the plant

and kissing him putting her hands in his hair. As he saw her allowing him to lay

her on the ground, they both failed to hear the trees rustling near by.

Yoko gazed at her nude back on a patch of grown aloe leaves and

wondered why doing something she wanted felt wrong. Why? Yoko lowered his

head. Because she was confused as hell and vulnerable and even if she did

start it, you took advantage of her. She was asleep in his arms and was beautiful,

but she would be lost when she woke. And when she did, he didn't have to look

at her crystal to feel her sadness radiating off of her as she stood quickly going

back to camp once presentable.

“I'm sorry.”

Once bathed Kagome went back to camp a few hours before dawn. She

saw Yusuke asleep, and Hiei in a low branch in a tree and felt horrible.

“Hiei.” He turned towards her giving her a look mixed with disappointment,

slight anger, and betrayal before he disappeared into the trees. “Hiei!”

Kagome ran after until she paused. Hiei had almost appeared in front of

her looking dead at her.

“Why do you even care to follow me onna!”

Kagome looked at him with a sniffle. “Hiei I'm sorry I was confused in-“

“-You didn't seem confused while you two were having sex-“

“-Hiei you don't understand-“

Hiei yelled at her. “-I don't understand because you don't trust me-“

Kagome spoke keeping her distance. “-And I don't trust you because you

don't trust yourself Hiei. You lie to everyone and get caught up in your lies and I

don't want to get hurt again because it hurts why I sealed myself off in the first

place.” She looked at him with expresent eyes causing Hiei to quickly calm down.

“And I don't want to get hurt again but I'd rather that than you or Yoko hurt.”

Hiei realized his mistake, again. Don't yell at her. Look at what's already

happened because of this. “Kagome-“

Hiei didn't get a chance to finish as Yoko ran up seeing Kagome deer like

timid and Hiei no longer radiating anger. “I realized he wouldn't hurt you, unless

confused terribly. Has she explained to you yet.”

Hiei spoke noticing Yoko didn't growl or go depressed noticing he was

holding her. “She doesn't want to hurt either of us. Why aren't you taking

action.”

“Because this is the action I propose to take. If she does not know who

she is yet never having time to adjust to being youkai from constant attacks, then

we can help her decide if she doesn't want to hurt us or doesn't know how to hurt

us, Kagome.”

Kagome looked at him confused. “I don't understand.”

Hiei spoke. “You are young. And haven't had knowledge that you were

youkai for less than five years. You are older than your youkai. Basically, now,

you don't know how to hurt us-“

Hey!!!! Remember when I wrote a while ago there would be an up coming

chapter that had some sex in it? Well, since not enough people got back to me

with wanting a hidden chapter or emailed to them, I'm ending this part like this. If

you want to know what happens or want the full chapter let me know through a

review or sending me an email. I think some of it will explain relationships in the

future. And if you've guessed by now, my writing style…Isn't blunt, so what

happens doesn't really mean anything is set, but it all ties together in the end. So

the end until next chapter, or email or review askin'. Or for a hidden chapter I

don't care which one, up to you.

Libby1428@yahoo.com