InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Adore ❯ Rotten Apples ( Chapter 3 )

A/N: It was kind of hard doing this from Kouga's perspective but it had to be done. I also felt I made Kagome a little too mature in the last chapter so I tried to show her more hardheaded side this time around. Just remember, by the time Kikyou came around in chapter 2, she had time to think about what Kouga said in this chapter and had come to some realizations off-camera. Now that the set-up is done, I can start on the actual romance! Also, I've been thinking of doing a lemon for this story. I am one of those people who rarely reads lemons because sappy sex tends to bore me after a while. That, and one does get tired of reading the same bump an' grind in every story. So, my lemon will be what I think a lemon should be; a tasteful romance scene (with sex) that explores the action through metaphors and emotion rather than the action itself. Vote whether or not you want me to have one because, frankly, I'm leaning either way. If I get enough yes answers, I might do an Inu/Kag one for practice to “Stand Inside Your Love” as a companion to this piece. Unfortunately to fans of the Inu/Kag pairing, this is the last MAJOR fluff scene between them as far as I know. The summary says mild IY/Kag for a reason. Anyway, enjoy.

 

Disclaimer: I've come to the bitter realization that I am posting this on fanfiction sites for a reason; therefore, I don't think a disclaimer is necessary for future chapters.

 

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Chapter 3: Rotten Apples

 

By Kenkaya

 

~Dirty your face

 

With longing and grace, God given

 

Suffer her heart

 

And love her when your love goes unrequited~

 

Kouga examined the youkai in front of him, shock evident on his face. He shook his head to clear the daze, realizing with astonishment that the youkai he had smelt, scouted for since early morning, was in fact the one standing in his path.

 

Blue eyes scanned her body with lingering disbelief. Yes, she smelt like Kagura, looked like Kagura--- but she had changed. The air of malice she projected in and outside of battle was completely gone. Those blank red eyes, so ominous in her early days, had a sparkle in them not present before. And her aura; the difference was beyond words. Kagura had always been an exotic beauty; Kouga would be worried as a member of the male gender if he could not admit that much about his sworn enemy. But now, with the accent of her plain clothes and simple ponytail, she gave off a more earthly, natural feel. Kouga found himself slightly forcing the growl out of his throat before clearing his senses to perform the task at hand.

 

“What are YOU doing in my territory, bitch? I let you live last time, but you're not helpless anymore. I should rip you limb from limb for what you did to my pack!”

 

Kagura's eyes widened in horror as she stepped back, Kouga had been too caught up in his thoughts and seemed rage to notice the violent tremors wracking her lithe body. Kouga's territory. She glanced at the familiar, rugged mountain peaks in the near distance, her gaze flicking back quickly to rest on the physical threat. How could she have missed that! Kouga cracked his knuckles in an obvious challenge. One look at his zestful grin said everything. Kagura didn't know what to do, she fell on her knees, head bowed.

 

“Aren't you going to defend yourself, woman?” Kouga blinked in confusion, maintaining his growl out of habit. Kagura didn't respond. In her mind, she repeated, `if I don't react he will go away. If I don't react he will get bored and go away.' The simple mantra cleared her mind, preparing Kagura for the mental escape she grew to depend on those last months with Naraku. She could hold out, any minute now---

 

“Well?!” he snorted in obvious annoyance. The persistent demand shattered her bubble; bringing to the surface all the memories, all the pain---

 

“I don't have all day, woman. Get up.”

 

Kagura looked up at him dejectedly. Her scent washed over him in waves; the musky stench of fear, the salty waft of despair, and bitterness of lost hope. He stumbled back, knowing the answer to his question was given in the depths of those doleful, ruby eyes. She was more helpless like this than she was back then, lying still and immobile on the smoking remains of the final battlefield.

 

His mind raced. Kagura laughed cruelly. Kagura killed. Kagura taunted him over the bodies of his fallen comrades. Kagura was crass and rude. Kagura was proud. Kagura actually cared about her own life. That was all she cared for. Kouga was stunned. This was not Kagura. His lips moved almost of their own accord.

 

“Who are you?”

 

Kagura lowered her eyes shamefully. She stared at the pebble laden ground as black dots pulsed across her vision. Her chest constricted in a painful twist, forcing air out of her lungs. She took large, very audibly gulps of air. Naraku was choking her. She had done something bad. Very bad. Oh, God, she couldn't breathe! The black dots seemed to grow with every pulse until they became spots, then blobs that expanded with each beat, completely consuming her sight. Kouga's question pounded through her skull. She lifted her lidded gaze, only to see darkness and a fluorescent phantom where he stood. Heat. He was angry. She had done something bad again. Her body felt weak. She swayed.

 

“I--- don't know anymore,” Kagura gasped as she felt herself begin to fall. Kouga watched speechless as the wind youkai fainted. Her body crumpled in the dust like broken glass.

 

Kouga pierced the limp form with savage blue eyes. Those eyes followed the curve of her body, remembering that day so many months ago, when Kagura broke. When Kagura vanquished an enemy hated even by his own. When Kagura mocked him in triumph and he beat her for retribution, sobbing until she blacked out in the dirt.

 

That day seemed so long ago, but etched as clearly in his mind as if it were yesterday. The day he let the woman he hated live and the woman he loved go.

 

~Where the cool winds blow

 

I must surly go

 

For my love calls below to drag her

 

From the depths of my soul~

 

“I--- please--- d--- don't touch me,” Kagura whispered fervently. Kouga peered into her unfocused red eyes curiously. “Please--- don't--- not again--- d---don't touch,” she hissed before finally slumping on the ground in a dead faint.

 

Kouga stared intently at the body. Her silk kimono was soiled and disarrayed. Her thin form convoluted uncomfortably in the position she fell. Her side bun of rich black hair, usually so pristine, hung mussed and tangled. She was pathetic, really, Kouga thought as he narrowed in on her pale face. He could still trace the trail her first tear had taken. The salty residue crusted on her cheek, reminding him of a scabbing wound. A battle wound. A scar. Somehow, the full impact of the event hit him head on just then; Kagura had cried. He began to laugh coldly at his silly thoughts.

 

“Kouga-kun?” a female voice questioned timidly. He could smell the slight tinge of fear laced through her scent; a musky overtone that positively reeked over her sweet, natural pheromones. Such a reaction would have made him proud years ago, but now his heart cringed with every whiff. He made Kagome feel fear.

 

He could see the hanyou pulling her closer as his white head slumped in the junction between her shoulder and creamy expanse of throat. A low challenging growl rumbled in Kouga's chest. Inuyasha did not respond. Kouga admitted he wasn't always the brightest crayon in the box, to himself anyway, especially concerning Kagome. But it did not take him long to realize his rival wasn't responding for a reason, most likely in part because he was unconscious. Weak hanyou, Kouga snorted in his mind. Kagome leaned against the half-youkai, the weight of one holding up the other.

 

“Inuyasha?” she questioned with concern when his strong embrace grew slack. Careening her head, she stared into the oblivious face pressed against the side of her neck. “Inuyasha!” she cried out a little more forcefully. Kagome adjusted her tired body to cradle his head of silvery white hair against her chest. In one rough movement, her knees gave way, sending both bodies to the ground. Kagome never let go.

 

“Kagome--- leave him--- it's over,” the wolf gasped, his own injuries starting to get the better of him. The anger that had fueled his assault on Kagura quickly dissipated as his body demanded sleep to heal.

 

Kagome turned to him, blue-grey filled with an emotion that looked suspiciously like pity. Kouga ignored it, focusing instead on the more obvious, she did not let go.

 

“Kagome, did you hear me?” Kouga demanded weakly. “I said it's over. Let's go.”

 

“Inuyasha's hurt,” the girl stated as if that was the only excuse she needed.

 

“K--- Kagome,” Kouga stepped forward, jarring his wounds. He let out a pained yelp as two broken ribs snapped outside their bounds, one piercing muscle, the other impaling a lung. He crumpled as blood hacked up, spraying the ground before him. One clawed hand reached forward. He could see her eyes widen in horror. He could see her concern. But before he passed out, he saw one more thing; she did not let go.

 

~When will I see her again?

 

The other side of friends

 

The darkened claws of death

 

The empty breath desire~

 

Kouga blinked his eyes open wearily, waiting for the blur of colors and shapes to finally settle. When they did, he saw wooden beams. The wolf youkai shot up in panic and fell back down with a pained hiss through his fangs immediately afterwards. The ground beneath was cushioned with straw and Kagome's scent was recent, putting his mind somewhat at ease. That didn't change the fact that he didn't recognize where he was. And he was inside. He hated not being able to see the sky. He hated the smell of stale, sheltered air. And most of all, he hated the fact that the air held the unmistakable scent of a certain dog hanyou. And the source of the smell was still in the room with him.

 

The volatile youkai shifted to see a shirtless Inuyasha lying on a straw mattress across from him. Bandages covered his chest and arms; seeping blood stains against stark white a testament to his deep wounds. His eyelids were closed peacefully but Kouga could hear the steady breathing of awareness.

 

“Finally woke up, wolf,” Inuyasha spoke, confirming Kouga's guess. He didn't answer; the phrase had been a statement, not a question.

 

“Was Kagome worried?”

 

Inuyasha opened pain clouded, amber-gold eyes, craning his neck slowly to face Kouga.

 

“Of course. She's always worried `bout someone or somethin' stupid,” the half-breed grumbled. “Like you or those damn tests of hers.”

 

Kouga blinked in confusion, inwardly fuming that the mutt knew more about his Kagome than he did. It served as a painful reminder of just how little he knew about the woman who held his heart. He would have to ask her about these `tests' later.

 

“I won't stop you, you know,” Inuyasha broke the tense silence.

 

“Huh?”

 

Inuyasha gave Kouga a serious look the wolf youkai wasn't use to seeing from his rival. Their past encounters usually consisted of insults, anger, smirks, growls and competitive blows. It was in that moment that Kouga realized that he really didn't know Inuyasha. This mature side was completely foreign to him and, he couldn't help wondering, if Kagome knew this side as well. He never truly understood why Kagome stayed in the hanyou's company before, but reasoned long ago that she felt obligated to complete her mission, resigning himself to live without her companionship until Naraku's death. Was there more to it than that?

 

“If you take her away,” Inuyasha began, breaking Kouga's train of thought. “I won't stop you if you take her away, but only if she wants it. If you kidnap her against her will I swear on every kami in this world and the next I'll hunt you down and rip you apart myself.”

 

“Why?” Kouga questioned suspiciously. “You've never been so generous before. This better not be some sort of twisted trick, mutt.”

 

“You want a reason,” Inuyasha spat. “How about I've been thinkin' a while? It gets pretty damn boring lying on your back all day, so it's not like I've anything better to do! I'm not Naraku, damn it!”

 

“I'll be damned,” Kouga muttered. “The dog actually has a brain.”

 

“Shut up, I'm trying to be serious here!”

 

“Fine,” Kouga sighed. “Why are you so willing to give her up now?”

 

Inuyasha echoed his sigh and paused a moment to collect his thoughts.

 

“Kagome is a carefree spirit,” he began hesitantly, trying to put his emotions into words. Kouga nodded in agreement. “She's always smiling and she cares about people. She hasn't changed much, `cept maybe she's not as innocent as she was at first,” again, Kouga felt a pull of jealousy at another revelation that Inuyasha indeed knew Kagome more personally than he did. “But lately,” the halfling stuttered at his next admission. “I've noticed a deep sorrow in her eyes. Since then I can smell it and the scent's gettin' clearer and clearer. She's pining away and I think I'm gonna snap if I have to keep on seeing and smellin' it. I can't stand it, and I don't know why it bothers me so fucking much! Kikyou always smelt sad but I didn't care. It was just part of her scent and it comforted me in a way, made me feel like I wasn't so alone. For some reason, smelling that on Kagome--- even a little bit seems so wrong. I want to make it go away. I'll let her leave with you if it makes the scent go away.”

 

Kouga could only nod, deeply in awe of Inuyasha's heart-wrenching confession. A long silence followed as both young men collected their thoughts. The door flap opened, pulling both their attention as Kagome walked in with more medicinal supplies.

 

“Oh, Kouga-kun, you're awake,” the girl flashed a bright smile and Kouga inhaled her scent deeply. It was calming and fresh like a spring breeze with a static intensity that reminded him of lighting and summer storms. He smelled no difference, no sadness. Inuyasha fidgeted, hissing as he aggravated his wounds.

 

“Inuyasha! Stop trying to move like that! You'll re-open your wounds,” Kagome gasped, rushing to his side. “Here, I brought some more bandages. Jeez, you're still bleeding,” the girl fussed. Kouga watched her gently tend the dog hanyou's wounds, apologizing profusely every time he made a sound of discomfort.

 

“Damn it! Stop your nagging, wench! I'll heal!”

 

“Stop being such a stubborn jerk, Inuyasha! One of Naraku's tentacles punctured your diaphragm! That could have easily killed you!”

 

“It didn't.”

 

“Don't make excuses! You're getting treatment and that's that!”

 

Inuyasha grumbled as Kagome continued to dote on him. In his mind, Kouga saw her tired body holding Inuyasha's desperately. She refused to let go.

 

“Well, that should keep dog-boy in the clear,” Kagome announced, sticking out her tongue when the hanyou growled menacingly at her cheek. “How are you feeling, Kouga-kun?”

 

“Aside from the headache you two gave me, much better.”

 

“Oh, sorry about that,” Kagome waved, kneeling down to examine him. “You seem to be healing nicely since we reset your ribs. Apparently that was your only serious injury. You should be out of here in no time.”

 

“Good riddance,” Inuyasha mumbled.

 

“I heard that! Inuyasha, for once in your life, would it kill you to be civil to Kouga?”

 

“Feh.”

 

“God, he's so immature,” Kouga had to stifle a laugh at her statement, remembering Inuyasha's insight only moments before. “You have no idea how much of a pain in the ass he's been,” Kagome said, turning away from Inuyasha as he shouted a random obscenity at her. “If he wasn't so beat up, I'd have said `osuwari' a million times by---“

 

A sickening crack sounded and Inuyasha screamed in consuming agony as his bodily weight pressed him into the ground unexpectedly. Within seconds, he was unconscious.

 

“OH, GOD! INUYASHA!” Kagome screamed, abandoning Kouga within the space of a heartbeat. The dog-eared boy groaned as Kagome rolled him on his side, desperate to reach the bandage knots and check his re-opened injuries. Blood leaked from pale, parted lips, dotting his ashy cheeks with specks of red every time the hanyou heaved. All the while Kagome mumbled, “Oh, God, I'm sorry--- didn't mean it, oh, God, how could I?! Ditz--- airhead--- stupid, STUPID! I hurt him--- oh, God, he can't die--- he can't! Please--- oh, God, I'm such an idiot,” and similar phrases. She seemed unaware or uncaring of the telling crimson that seeped through her blouse. Many of the curses and exclamations Kouga understood but a few sounded unrecognizably foreign to the well-traveled youkai. Just where was Kagome from?

 

“Holy shit,” Kouga whistled when the bandages were finally removed. Kagome choked back sobs, failing miserably, as she surveyed the damage. Scarlet pulsed unbidden from his pale body, running in rivulets down his chiseled torso. Removing the wrap on his shoulder, Kagome and Kouga could see bone white where the weakened joint popped, tearing through skin. But worse of all was the chest wound Kagome had mentioned earlier. The hole had already begun to heal since the battle, but now the scabs and dried shell were cracked, revealing slick muscle and tissue that twitched with every pained gasp of breath.

 

“K--- Kaede,” Kagome rasped between sobs before running out of the hut to get the old woman. Kouga could only gap. Those wounds were more serious than he thought. No wonder Kagome defended the mongrel every time he called him weak.

 

The door flap rustled again, admitting the form of an ancient woman he didn't recognize, followed closely by a frantic Kagome. The elder wore weathered miko robes and a patch over her right eye. Padding with a slow, steady gait only acquired by age, she eased herself beside Inuyasha, examining him quickly without so much as a tick on her wrinkled expression.

 

“Kagome,” she spoke in a voice groggy from overuse. “Can you get me some water from the river?”

 

“H--- hai, Kaede-baachan,” Kagome stuttered nervously before rushing out of the hut to perform her duty. Kaede sighed wistfully and began pulling herbs out of a pouch, arranging them neatly in front of her before turning to examine the hanyou more critically.

 

“How serious are they?” Kouga found himself asking.

 

“Very,” the old priestess responded without acknowledging him. The way she distributed her attention spoke volumes. Kouga leaned back to watch with growing anticipation.

 

“I brought the water!” Kouga smiled as Kagome bustled in, sloshing water down her blood, stained front. “Will he be okay?” the schoolgirl fretted.

 

“Only time will tell, child,” Kaede said, reaching over to grab the offered pail. Kouga watched as his love bent over his rival anxiously, watching Kaede's work like a hawk and helping when she could. A few hours later, the young kitsune entered the hut, immediately going into a panic when he saw Inuyasha's condition. It took practically all of Kaede's patience to convince Kagome to leave the hanyou's side and calm the kit down. Outside. Kouga felt the loss of Kagome's presence but turned his focus back on Inuyasha and the woman who tended him. With a small snort of triumph, the venerable priestess tied off one last knot and leaned back with a low, dignified yawn.

 

“Will he live?” Kouga again spoke without noticing.

 

“If he survives the night, our worries will be elevated,” she sighed, rising slowly on creaky, overworked bones. “I shall fetch Kagome. She will want to watch over him.”

 

~Dirty your face

 

With longing and grace, God given

 

Suffer her heart

 

And love her when your love goes unrequited~

 

Fire crackled late into the night. The dim, orange glow flickered across the form of a tired girl, bent over the sprawled body of a dog hanyou. Labored breath was audible even to human ears. The hanyou twisted slightly with a low groan, sweat beading on his brow as he gasped for air like a drowning man. The girl reached forward and wiped his face clean with a pastel cloth. He quieted under her tender care and she leaned forward, brushing her lips gently across his temple in a sweet, stolen caress.

 

Kouga watched the touching scene from his pallet. Now, he saw the sadness in Kagome's unguarded eyes. Her actions, that telling grey tinged blue, they gave it all away. And no matter how he hoped, the wolf youkai was almost certain that he was not the one who could make it disappear.

 

“Kagome?”

 

But that didn't mean he couldn't try.

 

“Oh, Kouga, I didn't know you were still awake,” she didn't bother to smile at him. Her voice came so strained.

 

“You should be asleep. This is too much for your human body. You'll get--- what?” Kouga whined as Kagome broke out in random giggles, the laughter taking over her weary body. He huffed at the indignation.

 

“S--- sorry, Kouga-kun,” the schoolgirl finally managed to choke. “It's just that--- you sounded so much like Inuyasha for a moment.”

 

“Me?! Sound like the mutt?!”

 

“Yes,” Kagome nodded as the fits subsided. “He's always telling me how weak my human body is. I have to be careful, I can't walk too much; I have to stay out of the way in a fight (unless there's Shikon shards involved of course), or how useless I am--- it gets me so mad, it's not like I'm glass or something. I can do my share, maybe I wouldn't be so weak if he let me help out once in a while!”

 

“Why are you mad about that?” Kouga asked incredulously. “Most females I've been around get all mushy when guys worry about them. I guess you don't like that kind of stuff,” he mumbled the last part thoughtfully and stored the newfound information at the back of his mind for later use. A brief smile graced his lips, “you're anything but ordinary, alright.”

 

“Worry?” Kagome's eyes widened in surprise before softening on the sliver-haired boy. “He was worried about me?”

 

“Why else would he coddle you?”

 

“I never saw it that way before,” the young girl admonished.

 

“Kagome?” Kouga questioned, letting the sound of her name hang in the air between them for a moment.

 

“Did you want to ask me something, Kouga-kun?”

 

“Yeah--- I was curious `bout someone dog-turd mentioned. Who's Kikyou?”

 

Kagome stiffened immediately and Kouga instantly regretted his words. The sorrow rolled off her in waves now, arousing the suspicion that whoever this Kikyou was had triggered the sadness Inuyasha spoke of.

 

“Kikyou is--- she's--- I'm her reincarnation,” Kagome blurted out. To say Kouga was surprised would be an understatement. Kagome was a reincarnation?

 

“She was a very powerful priestess who lived over fifty years ago. She was the original protector of the Shikon no Tama.”

 

“That explains why you were collecting the shards with dog-face,” Kouga spoke with awe. “Since you are her reincarnation the duty fell down to you.”

 

“I suppose you could say that,” Kagome whispered. “I didn't really think of it as my duty until I shattered the jewel, though. Before that, it seemed kind of like a--- thing that was just passed down to me through circumstance. I felt no responsibility until I was somewhat at fault for the jewel's fate. Perhaps Kikyou felt so bitter toward the Shikon because she had no real responsibility toward it like I did. Someone needed to purify the jewel and she was just the best person for the job so they saddled it on her. How sad.”

 

“Kikyou was bitter?” Kouga frowned. “I have a hard time imagining you being bitter.”

 

Kagome slammed her open palms against the ground and grief spiked through her scent. Kouga gasped as a single tear splashed against the ground, followed by another. He had never seen Kagome truly cry before.

 

“I may be her reincarnation, but I am NOT Kikyou! My mind--- my heart--- they are my own! Only my soul shares a common ground with her.”

 

“I--- sorry, Kagome,” Kouga stuttered, realizing he had hit a sensitive subject. “But, I don't understand.”

 

“What don't you understand?”

 

“Why it matters that you are so different than this woman. Anyone who shared your soul can't be a bad person, and not only that, she's dead so there's no way to compare.”

 

“Not really,” Kagome said hesitantly.

 

“That's not possible,” Kouga scowled back. “You have her soul now, so she can't be alive.”

 

“Well, she's not alive--- but she's not dead either.”

 

“Now you're confusing me. She has to be one or the other.”

 

“Technically, no. A witch resurrected her with bones and grave soil. That same witch pulled my soul out to fuel the sham body, but Kikyou killed her as soon her memories were revived. I managed to force my soul back into me, according to Kaede, but Kikyou moved on, powered by her old hatred for Inuyasha. She continues to live on to this day, feeding off dead woman's souls so that she can exact her revenge on him.”

 

“She hates the mutt?” Kouga chuckled. “I'm not surprised.”

 

“Sometimes, I almost wish she did.”

 

“What?” Kouga crinkled his face in confusion. “But you just said---”

 

“It's a very complicated hate, Kouga-kun.”

 

“Sure as Hell sounds like it,” the wolf youkai grumbled, wondering just what he got himself into. Who knew such a simple question could have such complex answers?

 

“I suppose I should start from the beginning---”

 

~Restless in my speech

 

And rootless in my teach

 

So vacant in my breach

 

I drive the dirt of her garden sorrow~

 

Birds welcomed the warm dawn with cacophonous song. The sky glowed a deep blue as the first rays of sunlight peeked over the horizon, tinting the clouds with an orange, gold hue and reflecting off the morning dew. Inside a simple hut, a modern Japanese schoolgirl fell victim to fatigue and slumped in dreamless slumber. Her relaxed body curled over the injured hanyou protectively. The dog-eared boy shifted closer with a pained groan, his breath coming easier than before. Kouga watched passively from his spot, remembering the last words of his `would-have-been' love.

 

“I decided then, I didn't care who Inuyasha chose. I still had my selfish desires, those would never completely go away, but I refused to let them get in the way. I wanted more than anything to see him smile. And I wanted to stay by his side so he would live to smile.”

 

Kouga shook his head at the memories and let a wistful gaze fall on the sleeping couple. A throaty chuckle escaped him.

 

“They love each other so much it's almost sickening.”

 

He allowed more amusement to fill him. Humor shook him at their obvious, yet so clueless, romance. He let the feelings come, dampening the void that threatened to consume him otherwise. The painful truth that his Kagome--- no, not his, she could never be his. Her heart was long gone before he even entered her life. She loved Inuyasha.

 

And he loved her back.

 

“It makes me sicker,” he whispered on deaf ears, “that they don't even realize it.”

 

He couldn't stand it. What he wanted so badly, what he could only wish for, these two took for granted. Last night, Kouga had seen into Kagome's real heart for the very first time. He loved her even more for it. The wolf youkai realized now that he didn't truly love her before. Yes, he was attracted to her power and beauty. He had seen her kindness under the new moon, a kindness that unseated a deep yearning within him. He knew she cared on some level, and he didn't become prince of his wolf tribe by being shy or modest. But now, he had heard her wishes, hopes, dreams, emotions she didn't express so openly. He fell for her all over again and it hurt to know he could never have her. He couldn't pretend anymore without hurting himself as well.

 

But, Kouga realized with an ironic snort, Kagome wouldn't be Kagome without her love for the rude, silver-haired oddity. He was her inspiration; instigator of her sorrow and the only cure all rolled into one.

 

Suddenly, the speed demon felt an overwhelming urge to grab the vulnerable young woman resting so trustingly before him and run away. Far away. He could hide her from Inuyasha. He could move his den and shelter her. And maybe, just maybe, in time she would come to love him as much as he did her. He could be the one to lift her burdens. He could do it---

 

“Inuyasha,” she mumbled sleepily, one slender hand falling down innocently to tangle in the hanyou's silver-white strands.

 

Who did he think he was kidding?

 

~She'll never listen again

 

No other lovers to bend

 

Just rotten apples to eat

 

Just letter yellowed distant scorn~

 

He couldn't stay, couldn't bear to watch. With a determined intake of breath, the wolf prince propped himself up on tan elbows. The pain in his chest had lessened considerably since yesterday, but the soreness in his bones returned with a vengeance. Slowly, he inched his way up. Relief flooded Kouga when he finally managed to push up onto the balls of his feet. Almost there. With one surprisingly smooth stroke, the youkai stood and hobbled out of the hut.

 

“Kouga-kun?”

 

Damn, he had woken her.

 

“You're still injured,” the exhausted girl yawned.

 

“I'll be fine. I was just returning to my pack. What's left of `em anyway. They're probably worried.”

 

“But---”

 

“I'll finish healing over there. Dog-turd needs more of your help anyway,” and, that said, the proud prince began to walk away.

 

“There's more to it than that, isn't there?”

 

Kouga chuckled, “you're more observant than I gave you credit for.”

 

“And just what's that supposed to mean?!” the future girl fumed.

 

“Nothing,” the wolf quickly raised a hand to pacify the enraged priestess-in-training. “I just didn't expect you to pick that up.”

 

“And why not?”

 

“Well,” Kouga sighed. “You aren't so--- pa--- per--- perceptive, yeah, that's the word--- when it comes to Inuyasha, so I guess I thought you were always like that.”

 

“What do you mean?” Kagome cocked her head quizzically.

 

“I used to get scared, you know, every time I ran off. Every time I left you with him.”

 

“Huh?”

 

Kouga sighed, “The mutt's in love with you.”

 

“I already told you last night,” Kagome shook her raven locks with a drained smiled. “I'm sure he cares about me, but the only thing he loves is this face.”

 

Kagome jumped as a hollow laugh filled the empty air, shattering a silence otherwise only broken by Inuyasha's deep breaths. The loud guffaws shook her to the core, rattling away whatever words she had in mind.

 

“Do you need anymore proof?” the mirthful wolf choked between fits. “He protects you with his life! Protection that deep is not taken lightly by canine youkai. I'm not sure exactly how much the mutt knows about his heritage, but it's pretty instinctual, protection is the form of utmost loyalty. A dog youkai, even a hanyou, only offers such protective measures to his family and pack.”

 

“But it's not willingly,” Kagome interrupted. “The rosary---”

 

“It may have started out that way, I don't know, I wasn't there. But for as long as I've fought `im, I can tell, he doesn't give it a second thought. He WANTS to protect you.”

 

“The Tessaiga,” she whispered. “I should have known. It only activates when the wielder wishes to protect a human. He wanted to protect me. He said it himself, if a bit rudely.”

 

“Leave it to dog-turd to screw up a good line. That's the only reason I wasn't afraid at first. I didn't think he could make you love him as long as I was around,” Kouga acknowledged bitterly. Somehow, he felt lighter.

 

“That doesn't prove anything though,” Kagome sighed with another dejected yawn. “He could love me as a sister or a friend. That's what a pack is, isn't it?”

 

“Yeah, but you're more than that,” The wolf youkai snorted. “He told me before you came in. He can tell you're sad, you know. He can smell it. He knows your pining. Did'ja know he actually said he'd let me take you if it made you happy? The scent bothers him. Can't stand it, he says.” Kouga peeked once to meet Kagome's wide, enraptured stare. “He said he used to smell sadness on that Kikyou woman, and it didn't bother him. But it's wrong on you.”

 

“I--- I don't understand,” Kagome choked. Confusion shone in deep, bloodshot blue-grey. “So he was comparing me to Kikyou again. What else is new?” the girl kept her voice steady but Kouga caught the salty whiff of tears held behind stable walls.

 

“No, you don't understand,” the wolf shook his head. “He wasn't comparing you to Kikyou. He was comparing Kikyou to you.” Kouga watched the disheveled, raven-haired girl with a somber gaze. Here he was, the prince of his tribe, driving the woman he loved into the arms of his enemy. An enemy she happened to be in love with, albeit, but a nemesis none the less. Everything seemed surreal and Kouga couldn't drop the feeling that he was floating on air. He couldn't ignore the fact that the sensation grew with every word he spoke on Inuyasha's behalf. He could sense it in the way Kagome's eyes lit up with hope. Suddenly, everything just clicked. Like Kagome, he no longer cared who she chose.

 

But he wanted more than anything to make her smile.

 

“I still don't understand.”

 

“When I heard your story,” Kouga began again, hoping to get his point across this time. “Inuyasha seemed very in love with Kikyou. But when he mentioned her that one time, she sounded like someone he had connections with in the past and felt responsible for. He said he didn't feel so alone when he was with her. I heard no love, until he mentioned your name.”

 

Kagome was silent. Tangled, black bangs obscured her eyes. Her soul, her heart was a mystery at this point.

 

“But, I wanna know why---”

 

Two pale fists slammed against the ground, startling Kouga out of his revere. They shook with the weak application of pressure, fueled by the girl's quaking rage.

 

“Stop it. Please, Kouga-kun, just stop,” she whispered brokenly.

 

“Stop what?” the wolf was apprehensive, very much affected by her sudden outburst.

 

“Please, I'm just tired. Please don't give me anymore hope.”

 

“If I'm lying,” Kouga rumbled low. “Then tell me why is he so aware of you? Why does he shield your life without a second thought to his own? Why does he always defend your honor? Why was he willing to put his pride aside for your happiness yesterday when he asked me? And, if I'm lying, why the Hell am I breaking my heart to prove this to you?! Answer me that, woman. Do I need to be more blunt? Tell him how you feel and I dare you to come back out with these accusations. I'm sick of this little skirting game.”

 

“Kouga-kun---”

 

The prince ignored her, limping out of the hut with only his regrets for company. At least she would smile in the end. He hoped.

 

~Dirty your face

 

With longing and grace, God given

 

Suffer her heart

 

And love her when your love goes unrequited~

 

Wind whistled ominously through ebony strands. Kagura lay there, disregarded, alone. Kouga snarled. His claws burned, itched to tear into her flesh. He wanted to rip her skin, spill her vile blood as the spirits of his long-dead pack members howled in satisfied triumph.

 

The death of his comrades, the single most haunting moment of his life. He had stayed behind while they fought, lured by the aura of the Shikon no Tama. What did he ever see in that damn jewel?! He arrived in time to see the ground littered with their corpses. Their blood soaked the ground a deep burgundy.

 

And she made them dance. She threw them in his face, forcing him to cut down friends he had known since childhood. To look in those blank white eyes, void of life as he tore into his brethren. She poisoned him. And she laughed. The heartless bitch, he hated her. More than Naraku himself.

 

When it came down to it, everything was Naraku's fault, wasn't it? The betrayal of Inuyasha, the loss of Kagome, the creation of Kagura, and the slaughter of his clan. Everything tied back to him. And she was the last connection. Just one swift strike and everything would be fixed. Just one simple slash across the neck. She had it coming. He could end it all.

 

A high pitched whimper reached his elf-like ears. Ice blue eyes followed the source and widened on the wind youkai's prone body. Her milky face creased with another whine, giving the impression of one in pain. Then she stilled. Again, she was Kagura.

 

And try as he might, Kouga didn't have the heart to kill her. Not like this.

 

~Life just fade away

 

Purity just begs

 

Dust to dust, we're wired into sadness~