InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Angel's Sorrow ❯ The Way Things Are ( Chapter 7 )

Author's Note: Sorry, if I made you'll cry…Hehe, thanks for your reviews, please review some more.

 

Chapter 7: The Way Things Are

 

Kagome woke in the wee hours of the morning, realizing she was sweating immensely in the winter's night. Her gown was soaked in sweat and her hairs lightly suck to her face and shoulders. She climbed off of her bed and quietly opened her door, making sure not to wake Rin and not to wake any one else, with keen and non keen senses. She walked down the stairs and walked into the gardens, a few workers were up going about with their duties as she walked through the garden. She remembered it too clearly, the pain and the happiness a like.

 

It was so unlike her to live in her memories but it was the only way she could remember herself, remember her cooperation in life. Erina had made him her mate on purpose, first reason why was because Erina never actually liked Sesshomaru, he was always so much of a pretty boy. Kagome acknowledged she had made mistakes in letting him steal her heart like that but it could not be helped, you could not turn away a grand person such as he. Well he had always been wrong about that.

 

Flashback

 

“Kagome, if you dare step outside that door, I swear I'll shred you to pieces” Sesshomaru growled, his eyes changing colors in mad rage.

“Sesshomaru, Inuyasha needs me, now” she said, trying to reason with him

“No, he doesn't, he needs to learn to fight for himself”

“So, you think you can send a whole pack of demons his way when he's still young, do you know how old he is?”

“Youkai his age, have to learn, we all learn early”

“Well, I don't care, he needs me, and I'm going to help” she said and walked out the door, suddenly shutting it and running down the hall before he would try to chase her.

 

Kagome ran down the hall and to the garden, Inuyasha was running away from the demons, he was crying and he was dirty. Such a small toddler was he, he was very scared. Kagome uttered a quick spell and the demons quickly were destroyed by the force of the attack.

 

She ran to Inuyasha and took his trembling form in her arms, soothing him and telling him its okay. He cuddled into her arms and cried silently, trying to let go of all the fear he had acquired. She held him tightly and then carried him back into the castle. Sesshomaru was obviously extremely mad because his eyes were a flashing crimson and a feral snarl.

 

Kagome ignored him, shuddering at the thought of what he would obviously do to let go of all his rage. She gave little Inuyasha to his mother and gulped hard before silently crawling from the room and hoping Sesshomaru wouldn't notice. She felt really good about this, until she got in the middle of the forest and realized she was lost and a bit frightened.

 

She slid down against the tree, sitting down and sighing softly before hearing a sort of growl only a dog could make. She damned her luck and opened her eyes, coming in contact with Sesshomaru's now stable golden eyes.

 

“S-Sesshomaru…” she said

“Kagome, you cannot go about disobeying me, do you understand?” he said in a very venomous tone

“Yes” she submitted, bowing her head in sign of submission and Sesshomaru grinned

“Good girl, you know your place, come on, we're going back to the castle”

“Please don't…” she pleaded silently

“Only if you let me” he assured and she nodded, following him back to the castle.

 

End of Flashback

 

“Lady Kagome, you shouldn't be outside, you know” said Akalo

“I'm quite alright; we're the Lord and his Lady?”

“Well, the Lord is still in bed but his Lady is standing right in front of me”

“You'll should stop, it isn't my title to discuss or own or flaunt”

“Oh, my Kagome, you should have been his mate, I am certain we would have been sunny as your nature”

“Oh, Akalo, you are too kind”

“No, my lady, you deserve all those praises and much more, you deserve it my lady, you make our lord warm again, that mate of his is only attempting to put Rin out and accusing us to be punished”

“Oh, I'm so sorry”

“It is not you, my lady, it's her”

“Go on, Akalo, let me be for a while, I have much to think about” said Kagome with a smile

“Yes, my lady”

 

Akalo bowed curtly before leaving off to the garden. Kagome only broke into a small smile and walked back into the castle. Sesshomaru was now up and the others were obviously still sleeping, all the others. Kagome passed him, trying her best not to be noticed by the man who, at this point, would most likely suffocate her with unneeded kisses. He noticed her, and she knew that, but he didn't say anything at all. Maybe he was in some sort of deep thought or maybe he had gotten over her.

 

Kagome shook the thoughts away and went to her room; there was a cup of tea and a note underneath the hot cup of substance. He had obviously made the tea because it was watery and unsweetened; he had always been bad at cooking, extremely bad. She smiled and drunk it anyway, she didn't mind.

 

After drinking the tea, she unfolded the letter and read the fine print.

 

Dear Kagome,

 

After thinking you would die, my heart broken in two. I spent a restless night wishing for your well being. Also, last night I thought of what my life would be without you, worst than it was after you left. Knowing that I have you here, I have the opportunity to make you mine after such a long time has made me realize that fate must have intended or mating in the beginning. I am willing to take great risks because I know that you are worth it. I heard of this priestess who can break mating bonds only if the couple desiring to become eternally bound is extremely in love with each other, this is how much I love you. Please meet me in the gardens after brunch; I would like to ask you in person.

 

Sincerely Yours,

Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands

 

When she finished the letter, she was practically on the verge of tears. This was the chance she was waiting for, the only thing she had ever wished for with her whole heart but now it felt like a death wish. She sat on the bed and sighed, Sesshomaru was not too frantic about her before she came, and her coming here was a huge mistake. She needed to tell Inuyasha they had to leave as soon as possible, at a time when he would not try to come after them.

 

Kagome put the letter down and went out of her room, going down a couple of hallways, and turning to Sango and Kykio's room. She knocked lightly, hoping they were not asleep and she was relieved to see Sango poke her head outside the door. She walked in, and shut the door behind her.

 

“Kagome…what's wrong?” asked Kykio, very concerned

“I-um, we need to get out of here”

“What? Why?” asked Sango

“I cannot stay here, it is not my destiny, it is not my wish”

“Oh, my Kagome, how could you say that?”

“It is not my place to break a bond and I wish not to trigger or subdue it, I wish to leave if you all do not mind, please forgive me”

“That's fine, I'll tell Inuyasha and we'll leave tonight or tomorrow morning, is that alright?”

“Yes, priestess, thank you so much” she said and bowed to both ladies before leaving

 

Kagome went to the gardens, going to meet Sesshomaru, although she was a bit early, she sat under a tree in the wooden bench. She had this decision in front of her, the chance of a lifetime and she was just going to throw it away for the sake of the way things are. This was the way things were, she reassured herself, and she could not change the way things were. She could not blame him but she could blame herself, she had been pushy, and with her here only made him lose his sanity and mental state so he became carefree. Such behavior in a lord was not acceptable.

 

She though, but what if that's how he wanted to be? Maybe he needed to be carefree, for the sake of his happiness and life. Maybe it was the fates that brought them back together; maybe it was suppose to be like this. For once, there would be a happy ending for Kagome. Her shattered dreams would not shatter her heart, it would be loved and love all the same, by the only one who deserved and the only one who ever accepted and cared for her heart, the lord of the western lands lord…

 

“Kagome, you are such a senseless child” said a voice, like her mother

“What? Who are you? Where are you?”

“Oh, child, I am were I am deemed to be, you wanted to talk to me all those times, here I am”

“Mother?” she asked silently

“Oh, yes my gracious child” said the voice and the voice turned into the tall image of her mother, who sat beside her

“Mother…” said Kagome, too shocked to think of anything more intelligent

“Yes, now my time here is very measured so I am here to tell you this, the decision you made about leaving the youkai to his mate is very proper, do not think twice”

“What? How could you say that?”

“Youkai are very despicable things, they do not feel for humans nor do they feel for the angels, that is the very reason the world had separated once before”

“Mom, I love him…I love him too much to tell him a lie”

“Kagome, you are in no condition to love someone who has never and will never love you the way you do. He has fooled you far more than I though, Kagome do not be stupid, do not commit the worst mistake of your life” yelled her mother and disappeared.

 

At the moment, Kagome was sobbing, her hands tucked into her lap, she was looking at them and crying, the kind of sobs that hurt and ache at your heart more than you ever thought possible.

 

Sesshomaru kneeled in front of her and attempted to look at her bowed face, which he could very clearly see had tears in them.

 

“Kagome, what is it?”

“I-I can't” she said between sobs

“You can't what?”

“I can't be your mate…I'm so sorry, but I can't do it”

“Why is it that you wish not to?” he asked, his own head staring at her hands

It's not right she wanted to say but opted to lie and say

“B-Because I don't feel the same” she said, the bitter words swearing to choke her for lying

 

The words stung Sesshomaru pretty strongly. He loved this girl, with all his life, yet she didn't feel the same. What he didn't know was that if he hadn't been in too much thought, he would have noticed that she was lying; her scent would have told her so. He took her little hands into his and sighed heavily before speaking.

 

“I see, it is after all my blame that I did not opt to do this sooner, I understand” he said, her tears prickling his hands

“I still wish for us to maintain a friendship, if you will accept…” he asked, putting a small flower in her hand

 

Kagome wanted to yell yes, she wanted to be close to him but it could not be done. He would always have feelings for her and the way she had feelings for him, something terrible would happen from them being together. She hated the way things were, the way things were made her a miserable girl, a miserable person who was in love with a married youkai. She could not just tell him no, his eyes held a lot of hurt it was almost unbearable. She opted for rising, the flower falling back into his laps and she walked of.

 

“I'm so sorry” she said before walking back into the castle

 

Sesshomaru stood stun, picking up the flower that fell into his lap he felt deeply deranged, he couldn't stand the painful feeling that threatened to kill him. The pain was an unbearable ache in his heart, he knew he loved her, he knew he needed her yet he was foolish enough to believe the girl would feel the same for him after years of resentment. He could only expect a broken heart that would never mend.

 

Author's Note: Hey, um, I hope you liked it, please review, I really like those, Hehe.