InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Before The Fall: A Prologue of Sorts ❯ Scene Four (or Circles) ( Chapter 8 )

Disclaimer: I do not, have not, nor will I ever own Inuyasha & Co. (sad as that may be), that honor belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Furthermore, I do profess that I am making no money from this, only getting hours of enjoyment.

Sango woke up abruptly clutching the sheet to her chest. Turning slowly to her left, she took in a lean arm eyes trailing a path to the trim torso barely hidden by the other half of the rumpled linens. Suppressing a groan, she rested her head in her free hand. This was the fifth time since she suggested they take some space. I am seriously deficient, she thought bleakly refusing to let her eyes wander to his sleeping form again. Trying to extract herself from the bed while maintaining her makeshift covering and not alerting him to her escape was proving to be more difficult than considered once she realized her pants were across the room. Busy devising a plan, she failed to realize that violet eyes were regarding her heavily.

She's up to something…Miroku thought before smirking. Probably figuring out how to escape. That won't do at all, will it? Silently freeing an arm from the tangle of bedding, he snaked it around her waist, leveraging himself up with the other. He smiled as he looked down into her shocked face, smiling wider as she flushed with anger…among other things.

“Get off me.” Sango hissed.

“Mmm, I think you have your words mixed up.”

“Now, Miroku. I shouldn't be here in the first place.”

He feigned hurt. “How could you think such a thing? And after the lovely morning we had?”

“A moment of stupidity and weakness.” She shot back, lifting her chin stubbornly. Please don't see though me…

Ouch. That one stung a little… “Sometimes a moment is all it takes…” he murmured, eyes searching hers. He found…fear. Sighing softly, he rolled away from her, resting his head on his folded arms. Watching as she flew around the room attempting to retrieve her clothes a quickly as possible while showing him as little possible, he mused on the state of things. After he'd kicked everyone out, he'd gone to her dorm prepared to convince her of his innocence. Once she'd finally come out, her impassive face was at odds with her watery, red-rimmed eyes and it tore at him. He had babbled then, fumbling over his words like never before. She was quiet and it made him want to explain all the more. Finally, she held up a slender hand, stopping the flow of words instantly.

“I believe you.” He was stupefied. Of course it was the truth, but he didn't expect her to believe that. He knew what it looked like. “I know you didn't cheat. But you did lie.” She looked him in the eye and he felt two feet tall. “I think we need to take some time and space from each other, figure out what we want. Perhaps we rushed things.”

“You know I have a habit of lying.” He blurted as she turned away. She stopped and he strained to catch her voice.

“Knowing a snake is a snake doesn't make it hurt any less when it bites you.”

Frowning at her cryptic answer, he simply watched as she reentered the building. Sitting on the stairs, he contemplated his actions. All he'd done was host a small gathering. Granted it involved alcohol, women, and board games -but none of it was for his benefit. While he was a lecher and a liar, he was also in a relationship now. It occurred to him that she was simultaneously running away and giving him an out. The question was did he want to take it? Did he want to single life?

No.

The answer was almost immediate. He wanted Sango and if that meant no parties, no drinking, no fun than that was…fine. It would have to be. Clearly, this space thing was not needed. Now to get her to realize it.

To be fair, he'd backed off for three whole days. On the fourth, he put his considerable male wiles to use and by the fifth, she was back in his bed. Things were going smoothly. Or so he thought.

As soon as she woke up she was very upset. She made that quite clear. Claimed he tricked her and got even more upset when he made mention of the enthusiastic response and resulting scratches on his back. She swore it wouldn't happen again for a very long time. Well, Miroku knew a challenge when he heard one. Besides, he didn't understand why she was so worked up about it anyway. He was being faithful and hadn't lied at all. Here he was doing his best and proving his love for her and she was throwing on her clothes like the building was on fire.

“Just so you know…”

“I know. Long time. Issues.” He filled in for her, slipping out of bed. Watching as her gaze slid over him hungrily, he smirked slightly as he approached. Tilting her face up, he looked into her dilated brown eyes and willed her to understand how much she meant to him. Lowering his mouth to hers, she responded by wrapping her arms around him and pressing her body to his. Lifting her easily, he made his way back to the bed, depositing her gently. As far as he could see, any other issues were null.

Later, Sango rushed though the school courtyard, head down sure someone could see, they could just look at her and tell what she'd been up to. Looking up at her name being called, she found herself face to face with Kagome who was headed in the opposite direction.

“Where are you coming from?”

“Nowhere…”

“Right. Why don't you just get back together already?”

“I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“Of course you don't.” Kagome nodded sagely. “By the way, your shirt is inside out.” Amused at Sango's mortified expression, she continued on her way at a leisurely pace, enjoying the warmth of the sun.

Inuyasha was determined to talk to Kagome today. Two weeks, two weeks, he'd been trying to have a discussion with her and she'd stonewalled him - in the nicest way possible, of course. Well not today. Today they were going to get everything out in the open.

Not that he knew what the hell he was gonna say to her.

Fuck that. Doesn't matter. He stalked across the main courtyard of the school, intent on meeting her outside of her class. He was so intent that he would have missed her wandering past him had it not been for her delicate scent teasing his senses. Taking advantage of her distraction, he fell into step with her.

“You can't avoid me forever, you know.” She glanced at him unsurprised, as though she had expected him to show up any minute.

“Who says I'm avoiding?” her mouth twisted into a small smirk, tone as mild as his was.

“You haven't retuned any of my calls.”

“Just been busy…”

“Too busy for a phone?” he huffed slightly. She gave him a sidelong look that made him regret the show of irritation. “I need to talk to you.”

“So talk.”

“Dammit Kagome, stop walking and look at me!” She stopped and turned to him, face placid. Great, he still didn't know what to say. “I'm sorry.”

“For what?”

“For…” Shit. “I don't know, but apologies are supposed to help.”

She shrugged. “Not meaningless ones.”

What the- “I apologize - and I never apologize- and you call it meaningless?”

“Yep.”

He stared at her in disbelief as she began to walk away. A calm, collected voice floated though his mind, She's just hurt. You saw her face that day…and was abruptly cut off by his mouth. “You're not my girlfriend, you know!” Fucking idiot…

Kagome stopped cold. Turning slowly, she fixed him with a glare that had iciness to rival Kikyo's. “Don't you think I know that Inuyasha?” she hissed stalking toward him. “Do you really think it was necessary to say it out loud when you made it so clear with your actions? And then you come to me with this -this bullshit apology and you just expect me to sit back and take it? Why? Because I love you?” Her incredulous eyes searched his. He stared back, stunned. “Answer me!”

“You cursed…”

She blinked once, twice. “I really don't like you right now.”

Inuyasha didn't intervene as she walked away this time.

“Well that didn't go well.”

“Were you eavesdropping, monk?” he growled, eyes still on her retreating form.

“I wouldn't dare stoop so low. I was simply on my way to see Sango and couldn't help but overhear your…disaster.” Miroku struggled to keep in his amusement and failed. Inuyasha shot him a withering look as he broke into guffaws and placed his hands on his knees to steady himself. “Apologies. But really, it was like you had no clue.” At Inuyasha's silence he smirked. “You don't, do you? Hm.”

“I don't see you handling your situation much better.”

“I am. Sango wants space because she thinks I'll hurt her. I'm simply reassuring her that she's the only one I want.”

“Or reassuring her that you're a horny letch and sex is all you're after.” He smirked mockingly as Miroku frowned.

“Since you seem to be so informed about my situation, what's the problem with yours?”

His smile fell immediately. “I don't know. I don't understand her anymore.”

“You never did. After all, you were the only one who didn't know she was in love with you.” Ignoring Inuyasha's growl, he plowed ahead, closing his eyes and holding up his pointer finger to lend a more knowledgeable air to his musings. “You pushed her and she poured her heart out to you but she felt embarrassed by her bravado in claiming you'd love her back. Not wanting to do further damage, she avoided you until things could return to normal. You, however, sulked around the apartment not only over Kikyo but Kagome as well. I tried to cheer you up and it backfired most miserably. When Kagome saw you with…with…what was her name?” He opened his eyes, ruining the effect, to see Inuyasha shrug. Shaking his head, he resumed his informed air. “No matter. The incident hurt her. It made her think that you'd never feel the same about her which made her want to avoid you even more.

“You have all that figured out?”

“Yes…well everything except for the period that you two weren't speaking, before you and Kikyo broke up…” Miroku trailed off, realizing too late that `her' name was still a sore point. He was surprised and slightly intrigued when Inuyasha blushed and averted his eyes. Lifting a brow, he decided to let it pass. Inuyasha had forgotten that night. Or repressed it. The mental image of a highly aroused Kagome was having a very different effect on him than he remembered. Clearing his throat, Miroku regained his attention. “I think the question is how do you feel about her?”

Opening his mouth to respond, he was at a loss for words. How do I feel? He loved Kikyo, he knew that, had always known that. He couldn't see her as anything other than the unattainable love briefly attained. He didn't want to. As much as people claimed the girls looked alike, after that first time he'd never seen it. Kagome was different. She believed in making the best of everything and genuinely thought there was good in everyone. She had faith in herself and her loved ones. She fought for the underdog. She was crazy.

She was also the only person he was in awe of. In Kikyo he'd had a kinship of loneliness and dissatisfaction. She saw the deficiency in him and reflected it back. Kagome was a perpetual cheerleader, truly believing he could do anything. She was always there, always supportive if temperamental. As embarrassing as it was -and he would never admit it to anyone else - the girl had wormed her way into his heart, deeper than anyone had since his mother passed away. Grudgingly, he admitted he took her for granted. How could he say thank you for everything she did for him, everything she put up with? And knowing he couldn't do that, how could he break her heart?

Looking around, he realized that he'd begun walking toward her dorm, Miroku in tow. Clenching his jaw in determination, he kept going. They were going to finish it, one way or another. The problem was once he found himself in front of the building, he still didn't know what to say.

“Just don't fuck it up.” Miroku said from beside him. Inuyasha smirked giving him a sideways look.

“Same to you.” Miroku nodded and they made their way to the girls' door. Kagome answered and her eyes darted between them. Her eyes settled on Miroku. “Twice in one day, hentai?” she deadpanned. He blushed and scratched the back of his head. Taking pity on him, she tilted her head toward the hallway. “She's in her room.” He thanked her and rushed by. “As for you, I remember a time when `I don't like you' didn't mean `come on over'.”

“Well, I know you didn't mean it.”

“What makes you so sure?”

“Did you?”

“…no.” she muttered, looking away. He grinned at her stubborn pout.

“Okay then. Can I come in?” Choosing not to answer, she simply stepped aside. “We need to talk.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “So talk.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Didn't we do this already?”

“Not exactly. I'm sorry for earlier. You're right, I shouldn't apologize for nothing.” She nodded once. “But that's not what we need to talk about.”

“It's not?” she repeated nonchalantly.

“You know it's not. We need to talk about us.”

“Us?”

“This will go quicker if you don't repeat everything I say.” He teased, relaxing a little when she smiled. “You said before that you didn't want to wreck our friendship, that it was important.”

“It is.” She affirmed.

“Then why haven't I seen you in weeks?” At her silence, he sighed and began to pace. “I know that you're embarrassed and angry at me. I get it; I'm kind of an asshole.”

“Kind of?”

He paused to glower at her and resumed pacing. “I didn't want you to see…what you saw, at our place. I knew it would hurt you. And I knew you'd jump to some crazy ass conclusion about yourself…I didn't want that.”

“What did you want?”

“I wanted to forget her!” he cried startling Kagome before stopping with his back to her. “I wanted to go more than five minutes without seeing her face, hearing her voice…without feeling like there's a gaping hole in my chest.”

When Kagome found her voice, it was rough and low. “I didn't know…I'm sorry. But I could have -”

“No.” he cut her off with a sharp shake of his head. “It couldn't be you. It can't.” Kagome tried to swallow around the lump in her throat as tears blurred her vision. She looked down, nodding repeatedly as he turned to her. It's okay, it's okay…ran through her head like a mantra. She felt his finger under her chin tilting her face up. “I care about you too much. You're the only person I could never forget myself around…you know me best.”

“I'm not so sure anymore…”

“I need you.” He blurted then flushed red. Still, he held her gaze with a steady resolve. “I know that things are weird between us and I know that it's not fair of me to ask you to stay by me, but I need you. I need my friend.” She was silent and he sensed the uncertainty in her. He was on the verge of pleading with her when she spoke.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” he repeated, unsure.

“I told you before; I don't want to lose you as a friend so that's what we'll be.” She gave him a half hearted smile. “I'm sure things will go back to normal in no time.”

“Yeah…” Inuyasha echoed again, calm voice belying his churning mind. If this is what you wanted, why are you disappointed?

Sango didn't bother to turn over as her door opened. “So which movie did you pick, Kagome?”

“Sorry to disappoint.” A baritone replied. She gasped and simultaneously tried to turn over and scramble away. It resulted in her falling off the bed and landing squarely on her ass. Back up in a heartbeat, she pressed herself against the wall, palms flat against it as she edged away. “Really Sango, you act like I'm going to assault you.”

“No, I just don't trust you.”

“Trust me?”

“Or myself…” she murmured. He smiled slightly at this.

“I think we're both trustworthy.”

“No you don't. You said it yourself, you're a liar.”

“I can change.”

“Not in five days.”

“Buddha changed in but a moment…”

“I wouldn't have believed him either. Why are you here?”

“Why are you running from me?”

“I'm not…”

“So you forgot these on purpose?” he responded easily, pulling a ball of lace from his pocket. Her eyes widened and she blushed before snatching them away. Once in her hands she was unsure of where to put them, floundering for a moment before shoving them into her own pocket. He moved toward her again and she held her hand up to halt him.

“I need space!”

“Space for what?”

“You lied to me! You lied and you could have cheated-”

“We talked about that. That's not the reason.”

“Lying isn't enough?”

“Sango…”

“You only want me for sex!” she cried as he approached again. Stopping dead in his tracks, he fixed her with a wide-eyed stare.

I hate it when Inuyasha is right. “You…really think that?”

“What am I supposed to think?” she hissed, narrowing her eyes before sighing and letting her arms hang limply at her sides. “It's all we do when we're together. I can't…think…when you're near me. It's too much.”

“You could think that I love you and I'm showing you that I love you. Or you could choose to believe -really believe- that I'm faithful and I'm trying. Maybe, you could even see that my intentions have never been to hurt you, only to make you see that we don't need to be apart.”

“It's not that easy.”

“No one said it would be.” He replied as he closed the distance between them, brushing her cheek with his thumb. “I can't tell you I won't lie ever again. I find it…necessary. I promise you, however, that I won't lie to you about anything important. I want to make it work with you. All I'm asking for is another chance. I'll do it right this time.” She looked up at him, searching his face. After long moments, she nodded and her eyes took on a dangerous glint.

“Fine. But if you break my heart, I'll break your body.” She hissed. He nodded solemnly and pulled her into an embrace.

“Agreed. Although an `I love you' would have been nice, I'll take what I can get.” She smiled at him and he kissed her curving mouth, gentle and sweet, reminiscent of the first one they shared.

“Miroku?”

“Yes?”

“Put my underwear back in my pocket.”