InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Bits From The Big Yellow Bag ❯ Left Wanting ( Chapter 15 )

Left Wanting

 

 

She couldn't stop crying.

 

It was strange, Kagome thought somewhere inside. She felt empty, broken, unfit… it was not dissimilar to when Urasue had sucked her soul from her body.

 

But if she was so broken… where did the tears keep coming from?

 

InuYasha had been beside himself; pushing away his own grief, she knew, to care for her. `I don't deserve his concern. I failed him… I failed myself.'

 

Arms wrapped around her stomach… her empty stomach, once so filled with life… Kagome choked on a sob. The attempt to strangle the noise turned into a heavy coughing fit, bringing more of those burning tears to her eyes and drawing her husband to her side.

 

What had she done wrong?

 

Kagome had heard some of the more vicious women in the village talking outside Kaede's door, saying it was a punishment for going against the will of the kami, for giving herself to a man with youkai blood when she had reiki coursing through her body.

 

Kagome gasped. Had she killed her baby? Had the power in her - unstable at best and completely out of control at worst - eaten away at its youkai blood until it couldn't sustain life any longer?

 

She buried her face in InuYasha's shoulder.

 

“Please, Kagome… it's killing me, to see you like this…”

 

The words penetrated the wet fog that seemed to have enveloped her body but she was helpless to stop the sobs that wracked her.

 

“I… I-I'm… I'm s-s-so sorry,” she stuttered, tasting the salt on her lips. “I d-didn't-”

 

“Stop it!” Kagome was taken aback - shocked out of her sorrow by his sudden anger as he grabbed her shoulders and shook her lightly. “Just stop it!”

 

Blue stared into gold, both awash with tears.

 

“I'm…” InuYasha looked away, swallowing the lump in his throat as his thumb traced one of the bruises left on her skin.

 

She was so afraid… afraid he'd try to send her home, scared out of her wits that he'd confirm how useless she was, how stupid she'd been. “InuYasha?” It was nothing more than she deserved, though.

 

“When I saw that hawk youkai come at you from the sky like that-” InuYasha's eyes were glazed over, staring at something only he could see in his memories, “Woman, my heart stopped.”

 

She hung her head, unable to meet his eyes.

 

“I…” He was never one for words, she remembered. Rather than prod him, she sat silently, waiting his condemnation. “I fought so hard to get to you… I didn't care that the other youkai was going after the headman,” he admitted softly. “I just knew that if something happened to you, I wouldn't survive it.”

 

Kagome's bottom lip was raw from her chewing and he drew it out lightly with his own fangs, swiping his tongue across it.

 

“Wench, I knew from the moment you hit the ground that-” He gulped, running a clawed hand over her belly. She clutched it like a lifeline. “I'm just glad you're alright.”

 

“But-”

 

InuYasha held a finger up to her lips, stifling her protestations. “No buts, wench.” He shifted himself and her, taking Kagome in his arms and between his legs until he was all but wrapped around her. Resting his chin on her shoulder, he let out a gusty sigh.

 

“I ain't gonna lie to you. It hurts… it hurts so bad I want to kill something, I want to scream and rage and tear down the forest.”

 

Kagome sniffled. “I'm still so sorry…”

 

“This ain't your fault. If I'd have caught you-”

 

“It's not your fault either! You told me to stay in the hut and I came running anyway and-”

 

“If you'd have stayed in the hut you'd have been flattened! You had to get out of there!”

 

Kagome had twisted uncomfortably to be face to face with him, each determined to remove the burden of blame from the other's shoulders… each with tears streaming down their cheeks.

 

They stared at each other for a moment before breaking down together, mourning the loss of a future that, for the first time in a year, now looked desolate.

 

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Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha or any other characters from the anime/manga. They all belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I just play with them

 

Originally posted to LiveJournal on August 16, 2009

Word Count: 690

Prompt: “Empty”