InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Broken people ❯ The left behind ( Chapter 1 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
The grave yard was moist with the early morning dew as the sun cast an eerie luminescent blanket over the rows of grave stones. The smell of death permeated from every pore in the earth as if trying to alleviate some of the pain that was buried in the soil.
A single figure stood over a mahogany casket that was being lowered into the ground. She stared at the inscription on the grave stone. June Higarashi Beloved mother and daughter 1962-2004
‘Heh’ she thought bitterly ‘are these six words worthy of marking and honoring my mother?’
Kagome couldn’t take her eyes away from her mothers name on that head stone. It meant she was really dead. It meant that she was all alone.
Next to her mother’s grave stone was a smaller one which read Souta Higarashi Beloved son and brother 1991-2002
‘Souta, I miss you’
She truly was alone. Kagome knew that it was the death of her brother that had caused her mother to die. Slowly pieces of her just began to fade. Kagome had to watch her mother die a slow painful death from grief and guilt. Her mother felt responsible for Souta’s death and she refused to forgive herself.
Kagome stood there and watched as men lowered her mother’s body into the ground. She had decided to have a closed casket service for she knew that even in death the look of sorrow was not washed from her face. No matter how much make-up they put on her.
And she couldn’t stand for that to be her last memory of her mother. She wanted to remember all the great times they had. June Higarashi was an amazing woman to know, and even more amazing to have as a mother. She tried so hard to make up for the absence of their father. They never knew him and therefore felt no loss at the notice of his death ten years ago. No one was sure why he left in the first place, only that he did leave, and for that June could not forgive him. So she pushed herself to be twice the parent in one.
On one occasion Kagome’s school was throwing a father daughter pancake breakfast. Kagome came home crying because when she was asked about her father at school all she could do was answer ‘I don’t know him’. Apparently this spawned a mixture of teasing and name calling, names that shouldn’t be yelled at a nine year old girl. Well, June being two parents in one decided that father daughter pancake breakfasts were for ordinary children and that just wouldn’t do because Kagome was special.
So on the morning of the pancake breakfast she and Kagome got all decked out in their finest dresses and shoes. They did their hair like movie stars and June even let Kagome wear her grandmothers blue crystal necklace. They wore make-up and had flowing chiffon scarves that they flitted about to annunciate a point if needed. The whole morning they spoke in snooty British accents. They thought it added an air of refinement and mystery to their little game of dress up.
Kagome was allowed to pick where they would go for breakfast and being the nine year old girl that she was she picked Denny’s. Kagome had an obsession with the French toast at Denny’s. So to Denny’s they went. When they walked in the whole place stopped dead to look at the two over dressed ladies who had just requested a booth for two in suspiciously bad British accents.
They ate there breakfast all the while pretending to be two movie stars who had ducked into the diner to wait out the paparazzi. They gave themselves new stage names and lives. Kagome was no longer Kagome Higurashi but Tallulah Bright, and June Higurashi was now Christine le Dijou. They sat there for hours detailing Tallulah and Christine’s lives. What movies they had been in, who they had dated, what the thought about so and so’s out fit at the premiere last night. They had a ball. The dress up breakfast club, as it had been dubbed, became a tradition among the two whenever one was sad.
These were the kinds of things June Higurashi did every day. Small miracles to help her children have fulfilled lives. That was the kind of person she was.
Kagome smiled at the fading memory, locking onto it, she concentrated on her mother as she was. The two years after Souta’s death had changed her mother into a broken woman. So much sadness filled her once perfect blue eyes. The lines of grief had become apparent on her worn face. She didn’t shine anymore. She would try to be happy for Kagome, but she knew that it was all an act.
Kagome moved back home and took some time off of school to help her mother try and heal. Yes the death of her brother had affected her a lot but she did not blame herself for his death and therefore was relieved of the humongous weight of guilt her mother carried with her. It seems that weight slowly drove her into the ground.
Kagome tried to help her but June insisted that nothing was wrong, everything was ok. She tried to cook and clean and do things that she normally would have done in the past. But nothing could soothe her anymore, not even the dress up breakfast club.
June thought that Kagome couldn’t hear her pain filled cries and whimpers at night, but she did. It was about a year and a half after Souta’s death that June had to be commited to the hospital. She’d become so frail, so lifeless. They had her on anti-biotics for an infection her mourning body refused to fight.
A few months later June died. Kagome was asleep by her side when she heard her mother whisper something about being able to take care of her baby boy again soon. Kagome tried to speak with her mother and tell her that she needed her. That her baby girl still needed her. June looked up into Kagome’s teary cobalt eyes and took her hand in hers. Her shaky voice cut through the silent room as she tried to relay her dying wish to her precious baby girl.
“Kagome, my sweet Kagome. I love you so much, but you are strong now and I am needed elsewhere. Please Kagome understand. Please remember our good times and try to be happy above all else. Please be happy because my special Kagome deserves so much.”
June’s hand went limp and Kagome screamed for the doctors and begged her mother to return to her. She was not ready for this, not ready to be alone. Her sobs over took her body and the last thing she heard before consciousness abandoned her was the monotonous tone of her mother’s heart monitor
Kagome stood before her mother’s grave a cesspool of conflicting emotions. She felt sadness, loss, and fear, but mostly she felt anger. She was angry that her mother chose to die for Souta rather than live for her. Yes Kagome was grown, if you consider twenty grown, but that doesn’t mean that she didn’t still need her mother. She did.
A layer of guilt frosted her body as she began to feel nauseated at her disrespectful thoughts towards her mother. She loved her mother, no matter what. She knew that June had her reasons for dying, but she couldn’t get past the feeling of abandonment. Kagome finally knew what it felt like to be broken.
What was she suppose to do now? Yes her mother left her the house but that would only serve as a place to live, not to mention a constant reminder of her deceased family.
Not caring if she got dirty she laid down on the grass in between her mother and brothers graves. In between the only family she had ever known.
She stayed there until night fall, not wanting to go home, not really knowing where to go. She was startled out of her thoughts when a flash of silver caught her eye. What was that, a ghost? Her eyes follow the ethereal figure, studying its every move.
Upon closer inspection she found that this ghost was actually a young man and not a ghost at all. He was tall and slender with the most unique flowing silver hair that fell to his waist. He looked to be about Kagome’s age, on any other day she probably would have found him attractive.
She remained where was as she watched him make his way to an elaborate grave stone a few rows away that depicted an angel that was probably taller than Kagome herself. He placed what looked like white orchids on the grave as he sat down beside it.
“Hi mom. How are you this week?” The young man began what looked like a routine ritual as he groomed the area around the grave. He cleared away any dead leaves or stray debris trying to make it look as tidy as possible.
Kagome knew she shouldn’t be eavesdropping but for some reason this boy talking to his mother eased her in some way. As if telling her that she is not the only one grieving in the world.
She listened intently begging for a distraction.
“Well let’s see this week I went to see Dad and I’m sure you know how that went. He always thinks I’m there for more money. I keep trying to tell him that I promised you I would look after him and make sure he goes to the doctor and all that crap. I tell you what mom he’s not making it easy on me, and Sesshomaru isn’t helping either. He just encourages him. I know you loved him but he’s changed since you died, he’s become so stubborn. He acts like he twenty-five and hasn’t had two heart attacks. He refuses to lessen his work load and I just don’t know how to handle him anymore. I’m just so frustrated.”
He stopped for a moment to take a deep breath and regroup
“Sorry mom I know I should be more patient. Well, anyways on to some more interesting news about me, heh. I finally got finished moving, ha, you know Miroku didn’t make it easy. He’s always trying rearrange everything so that his “love chi” will flow more smoothly. I swear one of these days that guy is gonna get a mouth full of my foot.”
Kagome couldn’t help it she let a little laugh escape. She quickly slapped her hand over her mouth praying that the boy hadn’t heard her.
She waited……no sound…..no talking…..oh crap……footsteps……angry footsteps
“Hey do you always make a habit of listening to other people’s private conversations?”
Instantly he felt a little silly referring to his commentary as a conversation, but he was pissed. No one was supposed to know that he still spoke to his mother, or rather to her grave.
He stopped dead in his tracks when he first laid eyes upon his beautiful intruder. She had long raven hair and the most sad and beautiful cobalt blue eyes. She took his breath away.
She sat up but was unable to speak as she was stunned by his intense amber eyes that were currently burning with anger and some other emotion she couldn’t quite place.
“Well?” He waited for an answer.
Kagome blushed as she realized he was staring at her straight in the eyes and was still waiting for her to speak.
“I…..I’m so sorry I was just laying here and you came and I was …..I just…I’m sorry I didn’t mean to intrude.”
It was then that he realized that she was laying in the middle of a grave yard at night, by herself….weird.
“Why are you lying out here anyways?”
Kagome suddenly felt all of her previous thoughts and feelings flood back to her as she tried to formulate a proper answer. Her eyes began to tear.
“Oh, my mother’s funeral was this morning and I…I just didn’t want to go home.”
Ouch. Now he felt like a total asshole. Why hadn’t he noticed the fresh grave beside her or her black dress…..he seriously needed to start paying more attention.
“Oh…..I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok I suppose you know what it’s like to lose a mother too huh?”
“Yea”
A silence fell over the two as neither knew what else to say.
“Uhh my name’s Inuyasha what’s yours?”
~~~~~~~~~~
Okay holy crap. I was reading over this today to refresh my memory and I realized that I totally screwed up! At the end of this chapter was an alternate ending that I had decided sucked, and I guess I forgot it was there.......so just disreguard that little flub up please:) Sorry, I'll pay more attention from now on. Thanks :)
Converting /tmp/phpbtaB4E to /dev/stdout
A single figure stood over a mahogany casket that was being lowered into the ground. She stared at the inscription on the grave stone. June Higarashi Beloved mother and daughter 1962-2004
‘Heh’ she thought bitterly ‘are these six words worthy of marking and honoring my mother?’
Kagome couldn’t take her eyes away from her mothers name on that head stone. It meant she was really dead. It meant that she was all alone.
Next to her mother’s grave stone was a smaller one which read Souta Higarashi Beloved son and brother 1991-2002
‘Souta, I miss you’
She truly was alone. Kagome knew that it was the death of her brother that had caused her mother to die. Slowly pieces of her just began to fade. Kagome had to watch her mother die a slow painful death from grief and guilt. Her mother felt responsible for Souta’s death and she refused to forgive herself.
Kagome stood there and watched as men lowered her mother’s body into the ground. She had decided to have a closed casket service for she knew that even in death the look of sorrow was not washed from her face. No matter how much make-up they put on her.
And she couldn’t stand for that to be her last memory of her mother. She wanted to remember all the great times they had. June Higarashi was an amazing woman to know, and even more amazing to have as a mother. She tried so hard to make up for the absence of their father. They never knew him and therefore felt no loss at the notice of his death ten years ago. No one was sure why he left in the first place, only that he did leave, and for that June could not forgive him. So she pushed herself to be twice the parent in one.
On one occasion Kagome’s school was throwing a father daughter pancake breakfast. Kagome came home crying because when she was asked about her father at school all she could do was answer ‘I don’t know him’. Apparently this spawned a mixture of teasing and name calling, names that shouldn’t be yelled at a nine year old girl. Well, June being two parents in one decided that father daughter pancake breakfasts were for ordinary children and that just wouldn’t do because Kagome was special.
So on the morning of the pancake breakfast she and Kagome got all decked out in their finest dresses and shoes. They did their hair like movie stars and June even let Kagome wear her grandmothers blue crystal necklace. They wore make-up and had flowing chiffon scarves that they flitted about to annunciate a point if needed. The whole morning they spoke in snooty British accents. They thought it added an air of refinement and mystery to their little game of dress up.
Kagome was allowed to pick where they would go for breakfast and being the nine year old girl that she was she picked Denny’s. Kagome had an obsession with the French toast at Denny’s. So to Denny’s they went. When they walked in the whole place stopped dead to look at the two over dressed ladies who had just requested a booth for two in suspiciously bad British accents.
They ate there breakfast all the while pretending to be two movie stars who had ducked into the diner to wait out the paparazzi. They gave themselves new stage names and lives. Kagome was no longer Kagome Higurashi but Tallulah Bright, and June Higurashi was now Christine le Dijou. They sat there for hours detailing Tallulah and Christine’s lives. What movies they had been in, who they had dated, what the thought about so and so’s out fit at the premiere last night. They had a ball. The dress up breakfast club, as it had been dubbed, became a tradition among the two whenever one was sad.
These were the kinds of things June Higurashi did every day. Small miracles to help her children have fulfilled lives. That was the kind of person she was.
Kagome smiled at the fading memory, locking onto it, she concentrated on her mother as she was. The two years after Souta’s death had changed her mother into a broken woman. So much sadness filled her once perfect blue eyes. The lines of grief had become apparent on her worn face. She didn’t shine anymore. She would try to be happy for Kagome, but she knew that it was all an act.
Kagome moved back home and took some time off of school to help her mother try and heal. Yes the death of her brother had affected her a lot but she did not blame herself for his death and therefore was relieved of the humongous weight of guilt her mother carried with her. It seems that weight slowly drove her into the ground.
Kagome tried to help her but June insisted that nothing was wrong, everything was ok. She tried to cook and clean and do things that she normally would have done in the past. But nothing could soothe her anymore, not even the dress up breakfast club.
June thought that Kagome couldn’t hear her pain filled cries and whimpers at night, but she did. It was about a year and a half after Souta’s death that June had to be commited to the hospital. She’d become so frail, so lifeless. They had her on anti-biotics for an infection her mourning body refused to fight.
A few months later June died. Kagome was asleep by her side when she heard her mother whisper something about being able to take care of her baby boy again soon. Kagome tried to speak with her mother and tell her that she needed her. That her baby girl still needed her. June looked up into Kagome’s teary cobalt eyes and took her hand in hers. Her shaky voice cut through the silent room as she tried to relay her dying wish to her precious baby girl.
“Kagome, my sweet Kagome. I love you so much, but you are strong now and I am needed elsewhere. Please Kagome understand. Please remember our good times and try to be happy above all else. Please be happy because my special Kagome deserves so much.”
June’s hand went limp and Kagome screamed for the doctors and begged her mother to return to her. She was not ready for this, not ready to be alone. Her sobs over took her body and the last thing she heard before consciousness abandoned her was the monotonous tone of her mother’s heart monitor
Kagome stood before her mother’s grave a cesspool of conflicting emotions. She felt sadness, loss, and fear, but mostly she felt anger. She was angry that her mother chose to die for Souta rather than live for her. Yes Kagome was grown, if you consider twenty grown, but that doesn’t mean that she didn’t still need her mother. She did.
A layer of guilt frosted her body as she began to feel nauseated at her disrespectful thoughts towards her mother. She loved her mother, no matter what. She knew that June had her reasons for dying, but she couldn’t get past the feeling of abandonment. Kagome finally knew what it felt like to be broken.
What was she suppose to do now? Yes her mother left her the house but that would only serve as a place to live, not to mention a constant reminder of her deceased family.
Not caring if she got dirty she laid down on the grass in between her mother and brothers graves. In between the only family she had ever known.
She stayed there until night fall, not wanting to go home, not really knowing where to go. She was startled out of her thoughts when a flash of silver caught her eye. What was that, a ghost? Her eyes follow the ethereal figure, studying its every move.
Upon closer inspection she found that this ghost was actually a young man and not a ghost at all. He was tall and slender with the most unique flowing silver hair that fell to his waist. He looked to be about Kagome’s age, on any other day she probably would have found him attractive.
She remained where was as she watched him make his way to an elaborate grave stone a few rows away that depicted an angel that was probably taller than Kagome herself. He placed what looked like white orchids on the grave as he sat down beside it.
“Hi mom. How are you this week?” The young man began what looked like a routine ritual as he groomed the area around the grave. He cleared away any dead leaves or stray debris trying to make it look as tidy as possible.
Kagome knew she shouldn’t be eavesdropping but for some reason this boy talking to his mother eased her in some way. As if telling her that she is not the only one grieving in the world.
She listened intently begging for a distraction.
“Well let’s see this week I went to see Dad and I’m sure you know how that went. He always thinks I’m there for more money. I keep trying to tell him that I promised you I would look after him and make sure he goes to the doctor and all that crap. I tell you what mom he’s not making it easy on me, and Sesshomaru isn’t helping either. He just encourages him. I know you loved him but he’s changed since you died, he’s become so stubborn. He acts like he twenty-five and hasn’t had two heart attacks. He refuses to lessen his work load and I just don’t know how to handle him anymore. I’m just so frustrated.”
He stopped for a moment to take a deep breath and regroup
“Sorry mom I know I should be more patient. Well, anyways on to some more interesting news about me, heh. I finally got finished moving, ha, you know Miroku didn’t make it easy. He’s always trying rearrange everything so that his “love chi” will flow more smoothly. I swear one of these days that guy is gonna get a mouth full of my foot.”
Kagome couldn’t help it she let a little laugh escape. She quickly slapped her hand over her mouth praying that the boy hadn’t heard her.
She waited……no sound…..no talking…..oh crap……footsteps……angry footsteps
“Hey do you always make a habit of listening to other people’s private conversations?”
Instantly he felt a little silly referring to his commentary as a conversation, but he was pissed. No one was supposed to know that he still spoke to his mother, or rather to her grave.
He stopped dead in his tracks when he first laid eyes upon his beautiful intruder. She had long raven hair and the most sad and beautiful cobalt blue eyes. She took his breath away.
She sat up but was unable to speak as she was stunned by his intense amber eyes that were currently burning with anger and some other emotion she couldn’t quite place.
“Well?” He waited for an answer.
Kagome blushed as she realized he was staring at her straight in the eyes and was still waiting for her to speak.
“I…..I’m so sorry I was just laying here and you came and I was …..I just…I’m sorry I didn’t mean to intrude.”
It was then that he realized that she was laying in the middle of a grave yard at night, by herself….weird.
“Why are you lying out here anyways?”
Kagome suddenly felt all of her previous thoughts and feelings flood back to her as she tried to formulate a proper answer. Her eyes began to tear.
“Oh, my mother’s funeral was this morning and I…I just didn’t want to go home.”
Ouch. Now he felt like a total asshole. Why hadn’t he noticed the fresh grave beside her or her black dress…..he seriously needed to start paying more attention.
“Oh…..I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok I suppose you know what it’s like to lose a mother too huh?”
“Yea”
A silence fell over the two as neither knew what else to say.
“Uhh my name’s Inuyasha what’s yours?”
~~~~~~~~~~
Okay holy crap. I was reading over this today to refresh my memory and I realized that I totally screwed up! At the end of this chapter was an alternate ending that I had decided sucked, and I guess I forgot it was there.......so just disreguard that little flub up please:) Sorry, I'll pay more attention from now on. Thanks :)
Converting /tmp/phpbtaB4E to /dev/stdout
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