InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Cracking My Heart ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 4 )

Kagome kicked her feet under the table. The interviewer was looking through papers, and the look on his face clearly spoke his opinion of her. It was the same look she had gotten from the past few interviewers. She had graduated a month ago, with degrees in history and education. However, though she was highly qualified, every single interviewer had closed up as soon as they found she was unattached as well as visibly pregnant.

 

Life hates me. Kagome sighed, her eyes downcast.

 

“Miss Higurashi.” The man finally looked up, with unnecessary emphasis on the Miss. “I'm afraid we do not need people like you. This job required responsibility and dedication.” He stood and strode to the door, holding it open for her. She stood and left, her step slow and weary.

 

The months since learning the news life had taken a turn for the worse. She had avoided Inuyasha since that disastrous day. He still sent things to her, which she accepted. She didn't think she would have been able to, but the little stuffed dog that greeted her the morning after was so cute that she couldn't bear to throw it out. To her surprise Sango was friendly to Inuyasha, so she was alone in her quest to stay away from him.

 

Kagome grinned slightly. Sango and Miroku were plainly in love. Sango was now spending many of her nights at Miroku's place. Kagome knew that if it weren't for her, Sango would probably move in with Miroku. As it was, Kagome could barely afford to pay her half of the rent. For the past few months Sango had even picked up part of Kagome's half. Sango had a fairly well paying job, so she could do this. Kagome, on the other hand, was beginning to fear that she'd end up working at McDonald's.

 

She had thought that she'd be able to return home to the Shrine after college. She had visited one weekend right before graduation. Kagome sank onto a bench in the park near her apartment. Tears threatened, and she rubbed her eyes with her hands.

 

Anger was an understatement to the reaction she had gotten. Her grandfather and her mother had basically disowned her right on the steps. All they had asked was who the father was. At this point, they looked unsure of what was going on. When Kagome gave her answer, her mother had given her a look of utter disgust, and turned on her heel and walked to the house. Her grandfather was the one who actually yelled at her. She had run down the steps, tears flowing, her grandfather's yells to get out echoing in her ears.

 

That day the bank account of her family she had been using was emptied. Kagome had a little money of her own saved, but it would soon run out. Kagome buried her face in her knees. She was not too large, so she could still move around okay, but she was noticeably pregnant.

 

Well, at least I'm not throwing up anymore. Kagome thought glumly. A tear slipped, and another, and another.

 

“Miss, miss?”

 

Kagome opened her eyes to a little girl tugging her sleeve.

 

“Why're you so sad?” the little girl asked.

 

“I'm scared.” Kagome said quietly. The little girl frowned. “Why are you scared?”

 

“Life hasn't been so great to me. I can't get a job, and I can't pay for things, and I'm really worried about this little one.” She patted her stomach. The little girl sat on the bench next to her. She looked curiously at her stomach, and reached out and touched her stomach. She smiled.

 

“I'm sure it'll be alright,” she said. “If its not okay, its not the end. My mommy says that.” The little girl smiled and pranced off.

 

Kagome smiled, and watched the happy girl run around and play. Tears still ran down her cheeks.

 

“I wish it were that simple.” She whispered.

 

Kagome suddenly jumped and spun to look at the man who had just settled on the bench next to her. Inuyasha looked straight ahead, leaning forward with his hands gripping the bottom of the bench. Kagome looked away from him.

 

“I don't need your pity.” She said softly.

 

“I don't pity you.” He responded. Kagome looked up, and found him looking straight at her. She looked down, but felt his gaze still on her.

 

“I just don't want you to be sad,” he said gently.

 

“Life is tough.” Kagome mumbled. A hand rested on her shoulder lightly, and she leaned into it, closing her eyes with a soft sigh. Arms closed around her body, and she leaned into his chest, crying softly into the crook of his shoulder.

 

“Shhh.” Inuyasha whispered, rocking the sobbing girl in his arms. He stroked her hair, rubbed her back, and rocked her. Finally she wound down, and pulled away from him. He let her go, but continued to watch her closely.

 

Kagome finally looked up, and met his gaze. “Tell me,” she said softly. “Why did you abandon me?”

 

Inuyasha looked down and sighed. He took a deep breath, and let it out. “I was at a hotel. She was there, and I guess I was so attracted to her.” Kagome looked down, and fought the urge to scoot away. “I don't know, she was like such an addiction, I guess. I know that I was an absolute bastard to you. Now I really wish I hadn't done that, because then you wouldn't have hated me so much. I-I knew that you would probably get pregnant, and I still left you like that. I can't believe…” he broke off, his voice choked. He turned away from her, letting his hair fall over his face.

 

“If you'll let me,” he continued, voice soft, “I want to make it up to you. I know you don't trust me, but I don't want you to be stuck all alone. Can I-can I take care of you?” he met her eyes, then looked away. He felt a soft hand on his shoulder, and then felt Kagome rest her head on his shoulder.

 

“I'm not saying I forgive you.” She said softly. “But, I want to give you a chance.” She looked up at him, and smiled gently. Inuyasha wrapped his arms around her again, and gave a shaky sigh. “Thank you,” he said softly. “You won't regret it.”

 

Kagome smiled. She ran her arm under his, and laid it gently across his back.

 

Maybe things will be alright.

 

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

 

Inuyasha grinned at the girl who was now laid out on her bed. “Tired?”

 

“Yea. I get tired really easily.” Kagome sighed.

 

He sunk down on the bed next to her, and reached out and tickled her side. She giggled and squirmed. He smiled at her. Kagome grinned and laid out so that her head was resting in his lap. She reached up and gently took some of his hair and started playing with it.

 

“I guess you guys like each other?”

 

Two heads turned and saw Sango standing in the doorway.

 

“You gonna move in with him, Kagome?”

 

Kagome stuttered, but Inuyasha saved her the embarrassment. “We haven't discussed that yet.”

 

“Ahhh.” Sango took the hint and left.

 

“Well, it's alright if you don't want to move in.” Inuyasha said finally.

 

“You help me pack and we sleep in different beds and I'll move in.” Kagome said.

 

He chuckled. “Deal. But you sure about the bed thing?”

 

Kagome rolled off her bed and pulled a duffel bag out from under the bed. She strode over to her closet and started pulling out clothing and stuffing it into her bag.

 

“I think packing was the first part.” Kagome said lightly.

 

Inuyasha grinned and rolled off the bed and sauntered over to her. He picked her up by the waist and threw her over his shoulder.

 

“Hey!” she yelled.

 

“I think I have the most important thing.” Inuyasha said.

 

“Yea, but I want my stuff. Sango shouldn't be stuck dealing with my stuff when she moves in with Miroku.”

 

Inuyasha grumbled and let her down. Suddenly he got a look of horror on his face. He looked at her belly then up at her face.

 

“What's wrong?” Kagome asked, now worried.

 

“Pup.” Inuyasha gasped. “Is the pup alright? Oh kami, I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have-“ Kagome cut him off by placing a hand over his mouth and one in his hair.

 

“It's alright. I'm fine, and so is the baby.” Kagome frowned. “Pup?”

 

Inuyasha nodded. “The pup's gonna have some youkai in it. Inu youkai call their young pups.”

 

Kagome grinned, and her eyes caught on the ears twitching on top of his head. She reached up toward his head. He inclined it slightly, giving his silent approval. She gently took hold of an ear and rubbed it gently. He closed his eyes and his face relaxed. She grinned and took hold of the other ear, and scratched at the base of both. He released a low growl. Kagome blinked, and laughed.

 

Inuyasha opened his eyes and focused on her. “What is it?”

 

Kagome was still laughing. “You sure you're not a cat youkai? You were purring.” Still laughing, Kagome walked back over to her bag and started stuffing clothes in again.

 

“I'm a dog youkai, thank you very much.” Inuyasha grumbled, and went to sulk on her bed.

 

It didn't take Kagome long to pack her clothes and she moved on to the desk. Inuyasha finally came over and helped her throw stuff into the bag. This was how he came upon a vase full of flowers.

 

“Mine?” he asked, and she nodded.

 

“They made the room brighter. It helped that there were fresh ones every couple days.” She smiled, and resumed packing.

 

Inuyasha took her stuff down to his car while Kagome went to explain to Sango. Sango was not totally surprised, and admitted that she would probably move in with Miroku soon anyways. After several minutes of happy chatter Inuyasha reappeared in the doorway, looking bored. Kagome took it as a signal and took her leave.

 

Kagome got into the car, reveling in how much different this was from her last visit. They drove in silence, Inuyasha focused on driving and Kagome watching the scenery. They arrived at his house shortly, and he carried her things into the house. He walked into the living room and stopped. Kagome stopped behind him and looked at him curiously.

 

“There's only one bedroom.” He said matter-of-factly. Kagome gaped at him and blinked several times.

 

“I only said I was giving you another chance,” she snapped, suddenly very angry. “We aren't going to just get together.” She would have ranted further, but Inuyasha stopped her.

 

“The couch in here is a fold out one. I'll sleep on it. Want me to help unpack?”

 

Kagome shook her head, still angry. “Where am I going to put my stuff?” she asked.

 

“There's plenty of empty closet space in the room,” he said. “Feel free to use it.”

 

Kagome glared at him, then turned on her heel and marched into the room.

 

“Mood swings, huh?” Inuyasha asked the empty room.

 

Well, at least you found her when she was feeling forgiving. If she'd been like this it would have been a lot tougher.

 

Inuyasha left and went to the kitchen to make dinner, deciding to leave Kagome alone until she cooled down or swung into a better mood.

 

Several minutes later he was scooping ramen into two bowls, and the simple action caused him unbelievable joy.

 

She's giving me a chance. Hopefully I'll be able to re-occupy my bed, with a new occupant, very soon.

 

“Dinner?”

 

Inuyasha turned and smiled at the woman standing in the door, noting that she still looked displeased. His ears flattened to his head, and he served the food in silence. He sunk into his chair and ate in silence. Sudden giggles from across the table made him look up with a glimmer of hope.

 

“Are you sulking?” Kagome asked, still giggling.

 

“Feh!” Inuyasha grumbled, and poked at his ramen. He felt a gentle arm settle over his shoulders, and he looked up to see Kagome sit down in the chair right next to him. She reached up and flicked one of his ears, and proceeded to gulp down food. He gripped her hand, still over his shoulders, and smiled.

 

Maybe this will work out all right.

 

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

 

Kagome tapped her pencil against the paper, and rubbed her temples. In the month since she had come to live with Inuyasha, life had changed for her. Part of her was genuinely surprised when he remained a complete gentleman, respecting her space, giving her the occasional back rub, but part of her was not. During the week she had dated him she had known he was usually very devoted and had a soft, kinder side beneath the rough exterior. He had work during the day, but he would call her several times to make sure that she was doing alright. The very morning after she arrived he set up an appointment for a doctor to check out the “pup,” as he called it. He had even accompanied her.

 

Kagome had pretty much given up the idea of finding a job, so she had been at a loss as to how to occupy herself until the baby was born. When she brought it up to Inuyasha, he had suggested that she find a hobby.

 

Kagome grinned as she stared at the paper. It was almost complete, now all she needed were the final touches on the hair. She had scrounged for paper and pencils, and decided to draw the furniture in the living room. Since then she had gone around, sketching and sometimes even writing poems or short stories.

 

A sudden thump in her belly made her drop the pencil. She gasped, and placed a hand over her belly. Another soft thump, and Kagome giggled.

 

“Oi, what's so funny?”

 

Kagome grinned at Inuyasha, standing in the doorway, clearly having just gotten home.

 

“Come here, Inuyasha.” She said. He frowned at her, but came and settled in the chair next to hers. She reached out and grabbed his hand, placing it on her belly. Inuyasha looked at her curiously, until his eyes widened with surprise.

 

“It kicked?' he asked.

 

Kagome nodded. “I was wondering when it would.”

 

They both sat quietly, just smiling at Kagome's stomach.

 

“You want to go out for dinner?” Inuyasha asked finally.

 

“Sure.” Kagome replied.

 

Both stood, and walked out to the car.

 

“Inuyasha,” Kagome began. He turned and faced her. “Uh, if it's just you and me, going somewhere, wouldn't that make it a date?” she finished quietly, her face bright with hope.

 

He blinked, and smiled, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “Well, if it is, you'd let me take you to your seat, ne?” he guided her to the passenger side, opened the door, and helped her in. He shut the door and got in on the other side. They were on the freeway when he spoke again.

 

“Would you like to go to the Bonsai?”

 

Kagome shot a quick glance at him. “That's where we had our first date.” She whispered.

 

“Yea.” He said softly.

 

“Sure.”

 

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

 

Kagome rolled over onto her other side for what felt like the millionth time that night. She opened her eyes and moaned at the red lights that proclaimed it to be a little after midnight.

 

I'm never going to go to sleep if it's up to you, isn't it? She asked her belly. It chose not to respond.

 

Her face took on a happy glow when she thought back to dinner. Inuyasha had been very courteous, and she was beginning to see why she had fallen for him in the first place.

 

I mean, normally I wouldn't even kiss a guy after the first week, let alone sleep with him. I loved him so much back then. I don't know if I ever really stopped.

 

No. I definitely hated him when he betrayed me.

 

He seems so sad about that now, and he is trying really hard to make it right.

 

She moaned when her body gave a sharp twitch.

 

On the other hand, if he gets me pregnant again, I'll kill him.

 

She cuddled into the pillow, fully aware of the fact that she was curled on one edge of the bed. Sleeping in the middle gave this extremely painful feeling of loneliness. At least on the side she could focus on the edge and believing that someone warm and loving was on the other side, just waiting to take her in his arms.

 

You kicked him out, remember? He's out on the couch.

 

Kagome still remembered that fateful night, falling asleep with him curled around her. It had been wonderful, then slightly painful, but he had taken away the pain. She had given herself to him, and he to her, and it had felt so perfect. She had been so happy that night. Waking up in his arms, peaceful and sated, had been amazing.

 

Ever since his betrayal she hadn't slept well, waking at the slightest noise, sleeping lightly and fitfully when she did finally drop off. It had been better since she had come to live here, but occupying this bed alone, his bed, brought on an entirely new pain.

 

He probably still doesn't want me. He was such a bastard. Only three days later, or not even. He met her at the hotel, so it was less that a day after he was with me… I was that terrible. Kagome's eyes fell, and she fought the urge to cry. He would know when he came in to get clothes in the morning.

 

Kagome finally gave up on sleeping and got out of bed. She wore long, thick sweat pants and a sweatshirt, even though it was summer. It was really hot, but she would rather have the coverage that wander around in her underwear, which was how she usually slept in summer.

 

You know, there's a solution to the loneliness, and you'll get an answer to all of these self-doubting questions. It is currently sleeping on the couch.

 

He won't like being woken in the middle of the night.

 

Then just crawl in with him. You'll stop feeling sorry for yourself, and if he reacts well in the morning then it means he likes you. If he flips then there you go.

 

In her exhausted state of mind, Kagome suddenly found herself in the living room, looking at the fold out couch, on which a lump lay under a thin blanket. Before her new found courage failed her, she walked all the way to the side of the bed and after a moment's hesitation, climbed on. She delicately stretched out, and held herself stiff. Inuyasha continued to sleep peacefully in the middle.

 

After several minutes Kagome finally relaxed a little and brought more of her weight down on the bed. She winced.

 

Damn, this thing is uncomfortable. He's slept on it for a month? Poor guy…

 

She stifled a gasp when an arm settled over her. She felt the other arm grab the thin blanket and bring her under it. She stiffened even more when she was dragged onto a firm chest. Soft breathing ticked her ear, and she relaxed a little.

 

“K'gome.” Inuyasha mumbled. She looked back at him curiously, finding his eyes closed and his breathing even.

 

He said my name in his sleep?

 

Kagome leaned back and relaxed into him. Within seconds she was asleep.