InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Duck ❯ Day III: Setsuka ( Chapter 8 )

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DISCLAIMER: I'll own Inuyasha when numbers and mathematical symbols aren't gibberish to me.

 

(Chapter Eight: Setsuka)

 

(Inuyasha's POV)

 

I was in the middle of a battle. It was late and the air had a chill about it that wasn't normal for this time of year. The demon that faced me gave me a look of such revulsion, it rivaled that of the ones that truly hated me.

 

As it raised its large, snake-like body, I quickly had my sword at the ready, anticipating its next attack. It hissed long and slow, baring its teeth at me. I only smirked, and giving a cocky little laugh, I swung my sword at the demon, hoping to get his head or somewhere to severely weaken him.

 

I missed and I was open for attack.

 

Only…

 

The snake's yellow-green eyes darted toward Kagome, who was hiding behind a rock for defense. The snake lunged, obviously realizing I cared deeply for the woman, and caught her between his teeth. I shouted, but it was nowhere near as loud as Kagome's screams.

 

The snake seemed to smirk at me, despite the beautiful dying woman in is mouth. It winked horribly and began to sink his teeth further in her body, its venom rushing into Kagome's blood stream. She screamed in pain. Tears formed in my eyes as her fear-filled voice found its way to my ears.

 

"LET HER GO!" I bellowed at it, the tears blocking my line of vision, "LET HER GO! TAKE ME INSTEAD!"

 

The snake only smirked and clenched his teeth harder on Kagome's body. She continued to scream. I abandoned my precious sword and ran toward the snake. There was no way I could save her now… She was going to die. There was an awful cracking sound.

 

Her spine had split in two.

 

Kagome was dead.

 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yelled.

 

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha!" Someone was slapping my face. I opened my eyes. Sesshomaru was sitting beside me and looking at me with a mixture of curiosity and concern.

 

I was sweating and panting very hard, "Snake demon… Murdering Kagome… Nightmare, I suppose."

 

"I should think so. You'd been thrashing about in your sleep for some time now." He said simply.

 

"Why didn't you wake me up? I certainly didn't want to dream that." I said angrily. I put my hand over my face… I was crying.

 

Sesshomaru tilted his head slightly. "I did try to wake you up, quite a few times. You attacked me. Perhaps it has something to do with the potion…?" He wondered aloud.

 

"So, what does that mean? Every time I go to sleep now, I'll have nightmares about Kagome's death?" I asked bitterly.

 

"I wouldn't know this, Inuyasha. I never went to sleep when this happened to me."

 

"Oh, well how great for you. You have no idea how painful that was to see…" I said, my glance now going to the sheets beside me.

 

He said, "Inuyasha, I fully understand pain. I know how it feels to watch someone you love die. When I was very young, my mother died fighting a great demon."

 

I hesitated. Sesshomaru had never told me about his mother before. Surely he hadn't meant to say that? I didn't want to talk about this with him. It was a very awkward silence. I had seen my mother die as well. I hadn't told Kagome about it…

 

It was a sunny day in a small village in southern Japan. I was very young, about ten I suppose. My mother had become very sick and had been bedridden for the past month. I was out in the fields picking flowers for her when one of my mother's handmaids had come to fetch me. She told me my mother wanted to see me. I asked her if I was in trouble, but the maid replied only with a small, sad smile. I didn't know then…

 

My mother's room was beautifully decorated with an assortment of flowers and handsome furniture. Her bed was very large and had many pillows and sheets made of silk; in the mound of fine fabrics lay my mother; quiet, pale and fragile. But she had a smile on her face, one that was only meant for me. I carefully climbed on the bed, trying not to disturb her much, as the maids had warned me that my mother was very delicate and she couldn't take much movement in her state.

 

She smiled at me once I settled myself. I offered her the flowers I had picked her. She looked up after taking them and said, "Thank you very much, Inuyasha. You picked my favorites. They're beautiful. You've always been so thoughtful."

 

She put her hand on my face and I gently kissed her on the forehead, "You're welcome, mother. They're not as pretty as you, though." She merely smiled. She sat there for a few minutes just stroking my hair, and occasionally she'd pet my ears.

 

"Inuyasha… Be strong for me, live a full life." She said. Her eyes welled up with tears. She began to cry silently, "Inuyasha, please. I don't want you to be sad the rest of your life. Be happy, be kind… Find someone who makes you complete." Tears continued to fall from her eyes and onto the silk pillows.

 

"Mommy, don't cry. I don't want you to cry. It makes me sad. Don't cry, mommy." I said. I laid my head on her chest, trying to soothe her. She gave a shaky sigh, trying to calm herself, but she couldn't. She was still crying, but trying to do so quietly.

 

I breathed in her scent. It was a simple sweet smell: peaches and cherry blossoms. I loved my mother's scent. She sat me up and looked at me with an odd look on her face, something like as if she were unwilling to do something.

 

"Inuyasha… I think-I think I have to go now." She said quietly. Her voice was weak.

 

"You can't go anywhere, mommy. The maids won't let you. And you're sick. You have to rest so that you can get better." I said to her, taking her hand. She shook her head and began to cry again.

 

"No, honey… I mean… I mean something else." She paused, smiling at me despite the fresh tears on her face.

 

"Mommy?" I hesitated, "Can I-Can I come with you?" She only smiled sadly at me and shook her head. I nodded, "Can I stay with you? Here, I mean."

 

Here eyes seemed to droop slightly, "No…" Her voice was as if she were having a great difficulty speaking, it was taking her strength, "No I don't want you to see… When… When it happens…Go… I don't want you to see… Be strong, Inuyasha… My lovely Inuyasha…"

 

Her eyes fell closed and I said, "What do you mean? You don't want me to see what?" She didn't answer. I figured she was asleep, I shook her arm slightly, trying to get her to wake up, "Mommy, wake up… What don't you want me to see? Wake up…" I paused at me actions, "Mommy?"

 

A maid walked in at that moment, carrying a tray for my mother's afternoon tea. She stared at us… Her eyes fell upon my mother, whose eyes were closed. She looked at my worried expression. She dropped the tray and ran over to the edge of the bed, and looked at my mother. She grabbed her wrist and felt for something. The maid's eyes went wide and she dropped my mother's wrist, putting her own hand to her mouth.

 

"What's wrong?" I asked her. The maid just shook her head and she took me off the bed. "No… No I don't want to go. Mother was going to tell me something. Let me down!" I yelled at her.

 

"Inuyasha," the maid began, "Inuyasha, stop." I stopped and glowered at the maid; she looked at me with serious, watery eyes, "Your mother is dead, Inuyasha. Izayoi is dead."

 

"No!" I screamed at her, struggling in her arms once more, "SHE-IS-NOT-DEAD! How dare you say that about her! Get away from me!" I scrambled out of her arms, tears rolling down my face. I approached the side of her bed, grabbing her arm and shaking her gently, "Wake up, mama… Please wake up… You're not dead." I shook my head, tears still falling down my face and on to the silk sheets, my voice began to crack as I spoke again, "You're not dead… You're not dead… You're not dead…"

 

But even as I spoke, I knew my words weren't true… For her scent… That sweet, simple scent… It had faded.

 

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I was walking slowly in the snow, looking back on my mother's death… I remember her eyes… Those soft, caring eyes that were never stern, harsh or angry. I think Kagome would have like to have met her. I think Kagome is like my mother in a way. A small, sad smile spread across my tired face as I walked in the afternoon light. I glanced down at the ground and saw something quite odd.

 

It was a small, vividly red flower that had emerged from the snow. I smiled at it as I crouched down to look at it more closely. Its petals were soft and they had little flecks of blue and white here and there. I tried to pick it (to give it to Sango as a gift and to see what it smelled like), but it wouldn't budge. I tried slicing it with my claws, but that only caused a sharp pain in my fingers. I simply shrugged and hoped that my congratulations would be a gift enough for Sango and Miroku.

 

I entered their hut and looked around. I'd only been in here once before, when they'd first built it. I remember Kagome and I smiling as Miroku proposed to Sango (again). A small twinge in my heart made itself known as I thought about this. My decision still stood; I wasn't going to let any insecurities make me feel any less of a man. I am not a coward; I am not a fool, either.

 

Sango was sitting her bed holding a small bundle in her arms. She smiled at me as I sat down on the side of the bed. Miroku was cleaning out a dish; I suppose Sango just had lunch. He smiled at me as well, when he noticed I was here.

 

"It's a girl, Inuyasha… I have a baby girl." There was a light in Miroku's eyes I hadn't seen before. It was a mixture of pride and duty, but also of love and laughter. He looked incredibly happy. There was no mistaking it.

 

"Congratulations." I said to them both. I managed to force a grin, hoping it looked genuine. Sango smiled her thanks. She looked at me with a question on her face and tilted her head to the side, still smiling.

 

"Would you like to hold her, Inuyasha?" she asked.

 

"Well, I… Uh-" But she was all ready placing the bundle in my arms.

 

I stared into the baby's face, she stared back. She smiled at me. I smiled back. Her little hand reached out to me and I gently rearranged her in my arms so that she could grasp my finger. She squeezed it curiously.

 

"That's-That's quite a grip you have." I said to her. She giggled. I looked up at Sango and Miroku who were holding each other and smiling at me, "What did you decide to name her?"

 

They looked at each other, "We haven't really decided yet… We couldn't really come up with a really good name. We want to name her after something from nature, something that's really pretty." Miroku said, sighing.

 

My gaze turned back to the baby. She was still holding my finger, but her grip had slackened a bit. As I stared into her face, I noticed slight similarities in her face and Sango's. Then I looked into her eyes. They were the same violet eyes her father had. I smiled again.

 

"She looks like you, Sango. But she has your eyes." I nodded at Miroku.

 

Suddenly, a thought came to me… I don't know what made me say it, or why this thought came into my head, but I said, "Setsuka."

 

"What?" Sango said.

 

I looked up, "I said 'Setsuka'. To name her…" I paused looking at their slightly stunned faces, "I didn't mean to impose… I just… Thought it was a pretty name…"

 

"I actually really like that," Miroku said, looking down at Sango, "That's a really pretty name, Inuyasha."

 

Sango said, "Yeah… Snow flower… "

 

Miroku smiled, "So it's settled. We're naming her Setsuka."

 

I smiled down at the baby, "Well, hello there, Setsuka. I'm your Uncle Inuyasha."

 

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I stretched again for the hundredth time that evening. I'd been writing in one of Kagome's notebooks for about three hours now. I didn't know why, but when I'd gotten back to the cabin, I had a sudden urge to write to her. I didn't know if I was going to let her see it or if I was just going to rip it to shreds the moment I finished, but I just had to write.

 

I came out of the room to see Sesshomaru standing there. He was angry with me because I'd locked myself in Kagome's room for three hours without telling him my decision. I didn't have five seconds before he slammed me against the wall, giving me a murderous stare.

 

"What is your decision?" He asked me sternly.

 

I glared at him, "I hardly see the necessity of pinning me against the wall for this, Sesshomaru." His arm pushed harder into my chest.

 

"What is your decision?" He repeated angrily.

 

I wrenched myself out of his grip, "Why do you care about this so much?" I yelled at him, "What is it that-"

 

"DON'T YOU DARE! DON'T YOU DARE LET THAT WOMAN DIE LIKE THAT! I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH FOOLISHNESS! HER GRANDFATHER TOLD YOU THAT SHE LOVED YOU, AND YOU CHOSE TO IGNORE THAT!

 

"NO ONE DESERVES THAT-"

 

My hands closed around his throat, cutting off his ability to breathe. A strength that I'd never experienced before rose within me.

 

I spoke, my voice shaking with rage, "I AM GOING TO SAVE HER! SHE IS THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME AND I WILLSAVE HER, GODDAMNIT!" I dropped him in the floor, storming out of the cabin going along my usual route to a clearing that I'd discovered long ago. I arrived and let out a roar of anger and rage. Some with myself and some with Sesshomaru.

 

"I want to see her eyes again," I whispered to myself, tears finding their way once again on my face, "I want to hear her laugh. I want to be with her." I let out another cry. But it was of anguish and suffering. I didn't know the result of what was going to happen after tomorrow, but I knew that when the time came to save her, I would. There was nothing I could do to change my mind. She would have to live the life I did; she would have to share my feelings of sorrow and the constant guilt I felt for just existing. She would have to be ready to leave this place if people didn't accept her for what I was going to make her.

 

I slammed my fist on the ground, my shoulders shaking I was crying so hard, "What do I do?" I yelled into the silent night, "Who do I do?"

 

'Follow your heart… Do what must be done.'

 

"What is that?" I yelled bitterly, "What must be done?"

 

'You know what you want. But you won't have it unless you do what must be done.'

 

I gasped, realizing what voice that was. I hadn't heard it in years. Closing my eyes I said, "Mother… Mother, I'm scared."

 

'Don't be, Inuyasha,'

 

I opened my eyes to see a small red flower beginning to bloom out from underneath the snow. Hot tears continued to flow from my eyes as I stared at the beautiful flower being born.

 

'for I am with you.'

 

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