InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Ever the Lotus ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 4 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: kanna37 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Classic / Mystery / Psychological / Romance / Drama | Type: Divergence | Uploaded On: 06.13.2011 | Pages: 6 | Words: 10.1K | Visits: 765 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Classic / Mystery / Psychological / Romance / Drama | Type: Divergence | Uploaded On: 06.13.2011 | Pages: 6 | Words: 10.1K | Visits: 765 | Status: Work In Progress
Chapter 4
Sesshoumaru let his thoughts drift as he flew – even at his current speed, it would take at least an hour to reach the extremely remote shrine of Omoikane in the northern mountains.* He had left Kagome in the village just that morning with barely a word, and he considered with amusement that his brother was probably thinking he had been satisfied in his curiosity, had decided he had no other interest in Kagome after all, and wouldn't be coming back.
He really looked forward to the disappointment on the whelp's face when he arrived back in the village once his current quest was completed. Such things, were, after all, pleasing to him.
Turning his mind away from that thought after a moment, he considered some of the things he wished to ask of the kami during this visit – if the god were willing to speak to him, of course. A rather sour look crossed his face at that thought – he was Sesshoumaru, and was not used to dealing with beings that stood above him, as there was usually no cause for him to have contact with the kami.
Even the visit to Kagome's time had strained him, a little – he was well aware that, as his equal, and there was no denying that she was, he could not act with his customary demanding nature in her time. Not even with her family – she would simply have never allowed him back, and that could not be countenanced – if he later decided he had other questions for her mother, or things he wanted to see in her time, he wanted access.
Being the tactician that he was, that he had been trained to be, he knew when the time for haughty demand was, and the time for peaceful parley, even if he did not like it. If anyone seeing his actions and manner in her time had questioned him, thinking he had changed, softened, they would be disappointed – he hadn't. He was still the terrible youkai Lord, the predator, dangerous and dark.
He had just subdued that part... temporarily, to gain his own ends.
At any rate, his biggest question to the kami of wisdom and intelligence – what was Kagome designed, created, to change?
Was there even any specific thing, or was she supposed to influence change in many things?
It seemed to him that the last idea held the most probability, but that did not mean it was the truth – the kami, after all, were rarely so straightforward in anything they did.
He frowned a bit as he thought of his previous ideas on time... and the effects her presence could possibly have on things. Is that it? Did the kami not like the shape of things as they had created them... so they created her to change that which they disliked? The things they had miscreated?
It was possible...
Eyes narrowing, he thought of what would greet him when he arrived at the shrine of the god. It would have to be handled delicately. He did not think threatening the lives of his priests and worshipers would be the way to gain audience with him – yet most likely, those same humans would not accept his presence, and would seek to keep him from entrance.
Humans... must they always make things so difficult? Perhaps entry into the shrine itself would not be necessary – after all, the kami would know of his presence in the area, without need of him actually entering his holy place.
It seems I would dare much in pursuit of my desires of this woman – not just of her, but of her origins. I would not have even begun to suspect what I would be willing to do for answers in the beginning. It makes me wonder just how much Bokuseno saw when I first went to him for answers.
His thoughts turned almost melancholy then, as his mind wandered into the distant past, and his father.
Did you know, somehow, father? Is that why you asked me such a question?
“Do you have someone to protect?”
Were you warned of how it would be with me in the future? That would explain Tenseiga, he mused. For if it had not been for that sword, I would not have learned of the value that... certain humans hold through Rin.
Not that Kagome is truly human, but still, the thought is there. She is not youkai, and I would not have held any value in one who was not before Tenseiga and Rin awoke that spark in me. He hesitated for a moment... No...
It was odd to admit to himself that the truth was even stranger than that.
He had not held any worth in anyone who was not him. For his opinion of even those youkai females alive today was low – they were not strong enough to impress him at all, with the exception of his own mother.
Even youkai males... he'd not found one worthy of his respect in all his years of wandering – the only one he even came close to having any for was Bokuseno himself.
After all, he'd fought countless youkai, male and female. Just look at the two females that had mistakenly attempted to take Tenseiga on Menomaru's orders while looking for Tessaiga. He flicked a lock of hair over his shoulder disdainfully at that thought – that one had been so weak that he hadn't even dared to face him, instead sending his servants to inevitably fall before him. And Magatsuhi... weak filth. To think that he would be capable of defeating one such as himself – it was ridiculous. Even the so-called Four War Gods. His opponent had fallen easily. That fight had been nothing but a waste of time and effort.
The strict truth was that none compared to his own strength and power, and he had the same attitude towards power - and the lack of it - that other youkai did. He could not find it in himself to respect one who was so far below him.
That had left him alone and untouchable on his pedestal above all the rest of creation – until certain odd facts about a young female began to infiltrate his mind... and then, it had been a foregone conclusion, really, that he would be instantly captivated by the only being, male or female, that had ever come close to his strength and power. And the mystery of her... of what she was... and now, of who she was – it was all designed to pull him in, mystify him, intrigue him.
There was no way he would have been able to resist an enticement such as Kagome Higurashi was turning out to be.
He palmed the hilt of Tenseiga, letting the sword hum to him calmly as he wondered about his father's possible knowledge of Kagome... and what she would be to him. It would not be so surprising to find that the elder Inu had known something of her; after all, his father was known for his meddling in all types of things, and had been quite capable of foreseeing certain future situations.
It is useless, however, he reluctantly decided, to worry over such things now. It is not as though I can get the answers to such questions – at least not at this time. Perhaps, another day, I can visit the underworld and find the answer to that, since Tenseiga is the key to the underworld, meidou or not.
His mind flashed with particular satisfaction to his memories of the guardians of the gate to the underworld, and their reaction to him and the sword he bore.
They had denied his half-breed brother entrance, and yet, had bowed to him, allowing him what he willed.
As it should be, he thought, idly stroking his pelt.
His reverie was broken as he began to feel the edges of a power much greater than his own, and realized that he was near his destination. Focusing sharply on the mountainside ahead of him, he carefully took note of the shrine. Aiming to land near the base of the stairs that led through the torii gate, he was slightly taken aback to take note of the head priest of the shrine standing at the top of the long staircase, as though waiting.
Allowing his cloud of youki to evaporate, he landed lightly at the foot of the stairs, watching silently the priest, to see what he would do.
He was somehow not surprised when the priest motioned slowly for him to advance up the stairs, and with narrowed eyes, he did so, alert for any hostile move from him, or any others that may be around.
There are no others, he realized after he swept the area with his senses. The only other humans in the area are inside the haiden.
I wonder...
Once he reached a spot just below the priest, he stopped, and waited. It was for the human to speak first – he would not give up his reasons for being here as though he were a supplicant asking for a human's permission to appeal to the kami.
“You are expected, proud youkai Lord,” came the voice of the human male, and Sesshoumaru quirked a brow, surprised, though he did not show it. The male answered the look. “Omoikane-kami-sama spoke to this servant this very morning and told him to prepare for your visit. Please, follow me,” he said, politely enough.
Sesshoumaru said nothing, simply following the male up to the gate, where he paused out of necessary respect and purified his hands and mouth in the purification trough that sat just inside the inu guarded gate. It would not do, after all, to insult the god.
He looked around, taking note of everything curiously. It appeared to be much as most such places were, the honden* and haiden* combined into one large building, elaborately carved. His attention was caught for a moment by a strong aura of power emanating from a large tree to the side of the shrine – that it was sacred was denoted by the shimenawa* wrapped around it.
Sacred to the god, it seems, he thought. Remembering the sacred tree at Kagome's family shrine, he smiled most ironically. So the kami have a particular love of trees. Bokuseno must enjoy that fact.
Emulating the priest, he bowed as they entered the honden, though not quite as deeply, of course. As soon as he stood back up, the priest nodded and turned and left, closing the shoji quietly behind him. Sesshoumaru dismissed his presence from his mind the moment he was gone, and instead contented himself with waiting for the god to show himself – he would not have gone to such lengths to have him greeted if he were going to avoid him, after all.
There was no sound or flare of power to give away Omoikane's entrance.
“So... the great youkai Lord Sesshoumaru comes to the courts of the gods to request answers.” There was a light, almost sarcastic emphasis on the word request.
Sesshoumaru refused to let the fact that he had been caught off-guard show, though it was a wasted effort; the kami knew quite well that he had been. Still, he would not react noticeably. Bearing was the most important thing in any dealings with those of such power as the gods.
“Does this surprise you, then?” he asked calmly as he turned to face the god. “This one is well aware that the kami plan for everything – it is easy to understand that you knew from the beginning that he would.”
Omoikane watched the daiyoukai through heavily-lidded eyes, amusement shining in the flashes of them that were visible.
“True, true. And if we had not known, your sire would have told us.” At the spark in Sesshoumaru's eyes, he chuckled. “Did you not know, then, that your father would be ever just as vigilant over his sons in death, as he was in life?”
Considering that piece of information carefully for a moment, Sesshoumaru did not answer the god, instead asking, “Will I gain any answers here this day, or will you simply amuse yourself with my presence?”
At that, the god sobered, and a stern look crossed his face. “It is not the place of any of those bound to the earth to question what we choose to do or not do, Sesshoumaru. You are powerful - but you are not a god. Do not forget your place.” After a few moments, when the daiyoukai merely continued to watch him, he sighed, and gestured for him to follow.
Sesshoumaru did so; keeping his eyes pinned to the kami, he did not notice how they were suddenly in another place for several moments, the shrine simply disappearing from around them as though it had never been.
When he finally did notice, curious, he looked around, wondering at where the god had brought him. It was a strange place...
All around them, mist flowed steadily, weaving in and out of the peaks and valleys of a mountain range that Sesshoumaru was certain did not actually exist – at least not in his native land. It was beautiful, but strange, the aura of the place flowing with more power than he'd ever felt before in his life, and he was quite suddenly aware that there were many kami here in these mountains.
After a time of silence, Omoikane allowing Sesshoumaru to take in all that was around him, and the feel and aura's of some of the other gods and goddesses, he spoke once more. “This is our place,” he gestured gently. “It does not exist, as I'm sure you are aware, within your realms. It is here that we first debated the creation of change.” He laid a peculiar emphasis on that word, catching Sesshoumaru's attention.
“Change?” he murmured questioningly, hoping the god would expound on that statement. He did.
“Yes. The world was decaying, in a sense. When we created it, everything within it moved at a certain speed. And that was as it should be. However, after a time, that speed began to slow... the changes that should have taken place within our creation at set times, began to fail, until nothing changed any more.” He stopped speaking, his dark, knowing eyes looking out over his paradise for a time as he contemplated things Sesshoumaru had never had a need to.
“Change is necessary, as I am sure you are aware. Without it, the world began to die. That was not part of our plan – so we needed to create something that could fix that problem. Some of us...” he trailed off with a sigh, silent for a second, then picked up his words once more, “wanted to let your world destroy itself, and start again. But... most of us did not. And so... we came together, here, and began to debate. What could we do, to save our creation?”
Fascinated, Sesshoumaru barely moved, not wanting to miss one word of what was being said, even as the god turned once more to look at him.
“Some of us soon came to a conclusion, and once we managed to persuade the majority of the rest of the kami, we set our plans in motion. You have seen the results of our labors... Kagome. You were correct, in your assumptions that she was created to bring change to everything she touches. But there is much mystery to her, still – even we kami do not know everything she is for, or all that she is capable of.”
Brow rising into his bangs in near shock, Sesshoumaru asked, “You made her a mystery even to yourselves?”
Omoikane laughed, and to Sesshoumaru's surprise, suddenly, it wasn't the same kami he had been speaking to. Instead, a female voice responded, though her aspect remained hidden, those swirling mists hiding the kami's morphing form from his eyes. “It was necessary, son of the Taisho. In order to be effective, Kagome had to be free to effect change on her own, with no guidance from us – or it would not be true change, merely the will of one or possibly more of us.”
Is it not the will of the gods that makes the world run the way that it does?
“No,” yet another voice answered his thought. “We created the world – but we have better things to do than to sit over it to make sure things continue to go the way we wanted. The less interference, the better, after all. And there are other realms, other realities to create, you know. There is an entire universe out there, Sesshoumaru, and it is endless. We do not have any desire to remain only here.”
“That is why you created Kagome, then,” he murmured in a tone of discovery, though he was really speaking to himself. “She is here to do what you do not want to do yourselves – she is here to watch over this part of your creation.”
“In essence, yes,” a chorale of voices answered him, “though there is a bit more to it than that. The gods do not change things, Sesshoumaru – we create instruments of change, such as Kagome, and then let them do what we created them to do.”
He looked up, then, from the ground beneath him that he had been staring at, deep in thought. “So then – what is Kagome Higurashi? I know what she is supposed to do now, in a general way, but that still does not answer what she is.”
“Is that so important? What are you, Sesshoumaru? What is anything? Kagome was right – too often, people, youkai and human, miss out on the truth of things in this creation because of their need to define everything. Some things have no definition – they just are. She is what she was created to be. It is enough,” the voices said, before the form of the kami before him once more became Omoikane.
“Think of her as an avatar of the gods, Sesshoumaru, and you will not be far off. But by trying to define her as either youkai or human, you are failing to understand – there is much in creation that is neither of those two things,” he said gently.
“You are blessed of the kami, Sesshoumaru – none besides your father himself has received such a clear answer to your question. If you choose to continue searching for more clearly defined answers, your search will no longer lie in the realms of the gods – we have said all we have to say on the subject.”
As the gods words faded in the air around him, he found himself once more standing inside the honden, alone, just as though he'd never left. Taking a long moment to gather his thoughts after such a strange visit, he looked around once more at the plain room he stood in, and then turned, letting himself out, avoiding any contact with the priests that guarded the shrine. He had no desire to speak to another at this point in time; he wanted to find a quiet place and contemplate all he had been told. He frowned for a moment as he took flight from the top of the shrine stairs – he had not had a chance to ask certain of his questions, though in the end it did not matter, as the kami had answered only what they had seen fit to answer, anyway.
Aggravating... but not unexpected.
He had to admit, what he had been given was, in a way, more than he had expected. He could take consolation in that, at the very least.
~oOo~
She is an avatar of the gods, or close enough to one... and that is all that they are willing to tell me – the only attribute they will give her. And she was created to effect change, but on a much larger scale than I had expected.
Truly... she is change. He thought about that for a while, his mind so preoccupied that he did not even pay any attention to the beautiful view of the lands stretching away before him. He was blinded to the wonder around him by the wonder that was Kagome.
So, she was created to be the answer of the kami to the loss of change in creation. That means that her influence is impossible to define – it is too large. Does she know the extent of things? Somehow... I doubt it.
It seemed to him that the kami had allowed Kagome free reign over their creation, but she was doing what she was supposed to on instinct, rather than actual knowledge. She had no full-knowledge of what she was, or the things she could do. At least not yet.
I can understand the kami's reasons for doing things in such a manner – after all, her untutored responses to the stimuli around her were what the kami wanted.
But what he did not understand was the reference by Omoikane-kami-sama to his father. Why did he deliberately bring father into our discussion? What does father have to do with this whole thing?
It occurred to him then, that in a roundabout way, perhaps the kami was giving him the nod that his father did, indeed, have some answers? After all, he had already considered going to the underworld to confront his sire about his reasons for Tenseiga. It just seemed so convenient – to have given him a sword he would have had no use for... under normal circumstances. It wasn't as if Tenseiga wouldn't have worked just as well to subdue Inuyasha's youkai blood – so that couldn't be the only reason that instead, it had been he, Sesshoumaru, to receive it.
It seems as if father was more involved with this situation than I had thought, if the kami-sama are bringing it to my attention.
He narrowed thoughtful eyes still blind to the scenery on the blue expanse of the sky above himself, his mind moving swiftly to a conclusion.
Yes... I think it is time to use the Tenseiga for something more than restoring lives. It is a key to the underworld, the fang of heaven – and so I will use it as such. A key.
It is time to visit father...
I would have an answer to the question of Tenseiga... and perhaps, a few other things as well.
Decision made, he stood and leapt from the precipice he had been sitting on, heading for the Gates to the Underworld. He would once more face them...
And their guardians.
~oOo~
Once more standing before the stone portal that guarded the underworld, Sesshoumaru drew Tenseiga, and the gate began to open, its bright light only emphasizing the huge stone guardians on their knees behind him. He paid them no more attention than he did the last time he visited – at least, after they had backed down and left him to access the underworld at his will.
Taking to flight once more after sheathing the sword, Sesshoumaru headed straight for his father's remains, knowing now that with Tenseiga, he could commune with his father's spirit anytime he so chose.
Not that he would often be bothered to make the trip just for casual chat, but when necessary... he looked around at the odd, and rather bleak, threshold of the underworld that his father now called home, and shivered just a little – he would not like to be forced to exist in this empty place.
Then again, he allowed to himself, it wasn't truly empty, and his father was no longer one of the living – it was very possible that he was quite comfortable in this place. It was a question to ask... one of simple curiosity, unlike his other questions.
Within minutes, he arrived before the gigantic skeletal remains of his father, trapped in a halfway transformed state. He wondered about that – it appeared as though he had died right in the midst of his transformation, a decidedly odd thing. For had he not died in the burning remains of the shiro of Inuyasha's mother, fighting with Takemaru, and chasing him into hell at both their deaths? What had actually occurred during those last few moments of life... and why was his fang still broken?
That question paused him in his tracks, setting aside all other questions in his mind. Yes, he knew that his father had used a fang to seal Ryokotsussei – but his father had lived for several hours after that, and that broken fang would have healed within minutes, even considering his mortal wound. In fact, even the wound had not in and of itself been fatal for a being as powerful as his father – it had only become so because of his determination to reach the human woman and his further battles to get to her side. If he had gone to rest himself, he would have been fine.
It was that very thing that had so angered him about Inuyasha's existence – if not for the whelp, his sire would still be among the living. At least, it was one of several reasons for his dislike of his half-brother...
That particular angst was long past, however; the Inu no Taisho had chosen his own fate, and it held no purpose to blame another for his choices. Setting that aside, his brow furrowed as he considered his father's remains with a rather discerning eye. Everything else appeared intact, save that one fang... and since it should have already repaired itself before his death, he had to wonder – what had happened to it? If it had remained at the site of his death, for whatever reason, it would have been known due to its sheer size – unless it was in another state, he thought suddenly, his hand idly stroking over Tenseiga's wrapped hilt.
Is that it, father? Was there some purpose to you giving up another fang in the moments before your death? Or was it even earlier – before you met up with Myoga, and he tried to reason with you? It seems the mystery surrounding your death deepens, just as the one around Kagome herself does. For every answer that is gained, a new one takes its place.
Eyes narrowing, he reached across and drew the sword with an elegance that none now living but he could effect, and as its power thrummed through the air, gathering in the sword in a cascade of brilliant light. After letting the power build for a moment, he swung it with a fierceness rarely seen in him, unleashing the full might of the Tenseiga – his father's fang, for the very first time.
The power flared, at first exploding outward from the blade to encompass the entire area, making his clothing and hair billow with the force of it, then it spread out in a cascading corona to surround all of his father's massive remains...
And the entire verge of the underworld shook with the demand that came from Tenseiga, as its hold on the one known as the Inu no Taisho loosened, allowing his soul to break free and heed the clarion call of the Fang of Heaven.
Sesshoumaru watched in silent awe as the true power of the Sword was revealed, his father's soul infusing his remains with an explosion of youki that shook the underworld even more, his terrible and massive spirit surrounding his skeleton with a whirlwind of sheer force, obscuring it from view for several long moments.
When it cleared...
His father stood before him once more, his remains no longer where they had been for over two centuries. And Sesshoumaru was left with eyes widened as he dropped his gaze to stare at the sword, completely taken aback at the power that he had been carrying around for so long – all along thinking it nearly useless.
“I never knew,” he murmured to himself.
“Was it useless because the forging of it did not take innocent blood, as did your Tokijin, Sesshoumaru?” came his father's voice, after a moment of silence. Sesshoumaru looked up, then, meeting the golden eyes of the male he'd for so long aspired to be, and stared at him, for once in his life, not sure how to answer.
“The innocent blood that was used to create that devil sword you wielded for so long... tell me, then – what of your Rin? She could very well have shared those innocents fate in meeting that blade, rather than the one she did receive meeting Tenseiga, instead. So, now... which blade has more power? Which is worth more? The sword that kills, or the sword that denies death its victory, and triumphs where none other could?”
Still stunned, but unwilling to stumble before his sire, he shook his shock away, and tried to formulate his thoughts. “I have already grasped the fallacies in creating and wielding a sword the likes of Tokijin, father – which is why, though I did not gain Tessaiga from Inuyasha, I simply went without a sword save Tenseiga after Tokijin was destroyed.”
His sire eyed him, then nodded. “Yes, it is apparent, by the fact that your arm has been returned to you – and the sword that now sings at your side. Its song is much more pleasing than Tokijin's ever was. But still, the question needed to be asked. For even until just a few moments ago, you were still blinded to the truth of the other blade you have carried for so long. You are not usually so slow to catch on, Sesshoumaru. Was your mind, perhaps, taken by some other interest, to the exclusion of all else?” he asked knowingly.
And that was when Sesshoumaru knew for sure that his father, had, indeed, known something of Kagome... and what his interest in her would be.
“You are alive,” he said bluntly, the question obvious within his statement, and his sire nodded.
“I could be, if I so chose. Tenseiga has given me that choice. But my life is done, and I will remain here. Returning me to life was not the point of Tenseiga's creation, my son. You have always been stubborn. Tenseiga was my answer to that.” The Inu no Taisho smiled, a subtle amusement sharpening his gaze just slightly. “If I had simply told you what was to be, you would have disdained it simply to spite me, personal beliefs of humans aside. No... you were never amenable to simply being given the truth. You had to be led, slowly, to the answers. Does that anger you? That I knew what I did, even so long ago, and prepared for it?”
The younger daiyoukai knew exactly what his father was alluding to – Kagome. So, since he had opened the door... “How did you know?”
“How did I know any of what I knew, Sesshoumaru? How did I create the Tenseiga to defeat death from my own fang? Is death and rebirth not the province of the kami? The decision to create the woman and her actual creation did not happen in a short time. The gods do not work on our time scale. It covered eons... and they made sure to set everything in motion that would be needed, or that was deemed necessary – including her reward for doing the duty the kami gave to her.”
Reward? Sesshoumaru frowned inwardly at that, not sure he liked what his father's words were intimating. I was created... as her... reward? Is that all I am, then? “And I am just to accept this fate, then? A reward for a creation of the kami – something they made to fix their own mistakes?” he asked, his manner suddenly stony.
And his father laughed at him.
“Sesshoumaru, have you not yet realized that we are all created with some purpose? Nothing in this creation of the kami is purposeless, though most never know for sure what that purpose was, and pass on just as clueless as they came in. And some have very negative purposes – Naraku comes to mind. His reward... is definitely not one that any would aspire to. Is your purpose then so unpleasant, when you had already accepted it – before you even knew of it? Your choice was your own, Sesshoumaru, have no fear of that.” He sighed at his son's deepening cold. “Just because the kami knew what your choice would be, does not mean they made if for you. Tell me... your little ward. There are things that you know about her – how she will react to certain stimuli, yes?”
Attention arrested, Sesshoumaru stared at his father. “Yes...” he trailed off.
“Does that mean that you have made the choice for her, then, in any given circumstance?”
Just that quickly, Sesshoumaru's thoughts froze, and he completely forgot himself, lost in his own mind as he took in his father's words.
Surely not... it is simple sophistry that father uses to confuse me. It is not the same at all, for I did not create Rin to answer to a purpose of my own. But then his conscience pricked him, and he delved deeper into his own mind. No... I did not create Rin, but I did save her for my own purposes, did I not? Is it not then almost the same thing? I like not being someone's reward, however... this one is not a 'prize' to be won by obedience to the gods.
He told his father just that, too.
Yet again, his sire had an answer.
“Do you not understand, pup, that she is also your reward?”
He could hear the displeasure in his father's voice at his recalcitrance, and narrowed his eyes.
“Reward?” he murmured. “For what? What have I done that the kami would think to reward me?” he asked, sarcasm coating his tone.
“You are – slowly, admittedly – becoming what you were meant to be,” he said wryly. “Would you prefer to be punished, instead, for refusing yourself your own happiness, simply for spite? I would have thought that after all this time, Sesshoumaru, you would have learned not to fight against fate simply because it is preordained. Must you be so willful? Would you cut off your nose to spite your face?”
“Why did you facilitate the plans of the kami in regards this matter, father? Did they really need your interference, your gift of this fang, to get me to cooperate in their plans?”
The great and deadly General looked at his son with sadness in his eyes. “Is it wrong, then,” he murmured, “for a father to wish to see his son happy? Would you not do what you could to give the child Rin the same? Do not tell me no, Sesshoumaru – I have seen the things you have done for that child. Tell me, why is it so wrong for me to have done the same?”
That question, combined with the look in his father's eyes, caused guilt to swell sharply within him, and he growled, not used to such a useless emotion. He was not one to regret, or to feel guilt in his dealings with others – at least, not very often. He didn't like it now, either, but could find no defense against it.
Because his father was right. He had forgotten what it was like to have a parent, his mother aside, one that cared for him, in his life. It had been so long since he had felt such a thing, for even before his death, the circumstances of the General's liaison with Inuyasha's mother, and his preoccupation with his second son's impending birth, had caused him to push away from his sire. Only within his own mind could he admit the reason for his reaction to the sibling he had hated from the moment of his conception – simple jealousy.
He had wanted to keep his father for himself.
Sharing, at least at that point, hadn't been something he'd been very good at. It still wasn't – though he was a bit better at it now.
He had, at least, learned some things in the intervening years.
Tacitly giving his father the ground on that matter, he instead asked, “And the broken fang?”
Taking Sesshoumaru's change of subject for exactly what it meant, his father nodded at him, understanding his question. “A minor matter, Sesshoumaru – there is no mystery there. What do you think Saia used to seal Sou'unga for those five hundred years? My fang, broken or not, worked quite well to keep his evil energy sealed away – for a time, anyway.”
“Hn.” He considered his sire for several seconds. “And Kagome? Will I ever have the answer to the Lotus?”
At that, his father laughed again, his eyes lit with mirth as he shook his head at his son. “Have you not already been told, repeatedly, Sesshoumaru? She is. That is the answer to the Lotus, as Bokuseno so aptly named her. She is mystery, yes – but she is also truth. She is an avatar of the gods, she is change personified. She is. What else is there? No, she is not youkai, no, she is not kami, and no, she is not really even human. It does not matter. Some mysteries were not meant to be known – or they would not be mysteries. If she could be so easily explained, she would not be the Lotus, ne?”
His eyes lowered to the rock beneath his feet, and his mind churned with his father's words. Is it really so pointless to question, then? For his words are correct – not every mystery can be known. Some things need no answers... is she truly one of them?
But then again... there is an answer. She is change personified, is what father said. I am the personification of my youki... it is not so different, I suppose.
He sighed aloud, something he rarely did, and his eyes once more focused on his sire as he accepted his elder's words. After all, he had already decided that it did not matter to his desires towards her – and even knowing that the kami had created him for her, did not, in the end, change his mind.
He still wanted her.
At least he was assured that he would have her, though that had never really been a question in his mind. He almost always got what he wanted.
“You are sure that you will remain here?”
The mighty Inu no Taisho merely nodded, saying not another word.
Sesshoumaru watched his father for a moment, then inclined his head in a silent goodbye and took to the air, his mind so full of what he had learned this day, and all that had happened, that he did not even think to try to convince his sire to return to the earth with him.
~oOo~
As morning gave way to afternoon, Sesshoumaru stirred slightly from his contemplation of all that had passed that day, finally taking in the view he had always loved. High above the surrounding lands, the vantage point he was currently standing on was his favorite place in all the West. From it, he could see clearly over almost the entirety of the northern half of his lands.
It was a place he spent a great deal of time, truthfully, especially when his mind was unsettled as it had been this day. But as always, a sojourn here soothed him, allowing him to once more turn himself back to his usual calm, collected persona.
I will bring Kagome here. She would enjoy the view, as well, I believe – and I did say I would show her the things I consider important in my world, as she did for me in hers.
The thought of bringing her here did not displease him, on the contrary, sharing a place so sacred to himself with her seemed right, as if it were something that should be done.
Perhaps it is... he thought idly. His mind then turned back to his meeting with his father, and he frowned, annoyed with himself. He'd once more allowed his sire to knock him off-kilter, and that was unacceptable. In all his centuries, his father was the only one to be able to do that – and it had always made him feel like a pup with little experience of the world.
Even now, it was the same. From the first few words, his father had had him at a disadvantage, and kept him there. It frustrated Sesshoumaru that he had still not managed to meet his sire on equal ground. Though he had recovered better, and quicker, this time than ever before, so that was some ground gained, at least.
With an inward sigh, he once more gathered his ice around himself, then centered his mind, taking to the air to return to Inuyasha's village.
It was time to go back to the source of all his questions – and recent frustrations.
Kagome...
~oOo~
Kagome sighed, chin in hand as she rolled her eyes at her hanyou best friend.
He'd been ranting and lecturing all morning – ever since Sesshoumaru had up and disappeared without a single word.
And frankly, it was getting old.
“Inuyasha.”
Mid-rant, Inuyasha froze – when Kagome spoke in that tone, nothing good came of it, and he knew it. “What?” he asked cautiously, eyeing her nervously.
“If, as you are so convinced, Sesshoumaru has seen the error of his ways, and has left, having no more interest in me, why are you still carrying on about how I should push him away and avoid him?” she asked as she watched him, a rather bored expression on her face that didn't fool him for a minute.
“Keh! All I'm sayin' is, if he does come back, you gotta watch your back,” he responded. “Just to be on the safe side. Come on, Kagome – you know what he's like – a woman like you wouldn't be good for his 'reputation',” he spat, “even if you aren't exactly human like we all thought. You ain't youkai, either – and that's all he'll care about.” He blushed and looked away, then, not able to meet her eyes. “I know you're attracted to him, and... I just want you to be safe,” he finally sighed, still looking elsewhere. “I don't want to see him use you and then throw you away.”
He was stunned to hear her laugh. Whipping his head back around to stare at her, he gaped at the mirth in her eyes.
“Oh, Inuyasha. Why ever would Sesshoumaru of all people want a 'one-night stand' with me? I'm sure he's got better things to do than me,” she giggled, absolutely loving the gape-jawed expression on his face at her less than proper quip. “Lighten up. Everything will work out just fine, you'll see. You need to calm down about your brother – all this excitement isn't good for you.”
She stood up from the stump she'd been sitting on while he'd lectured her, and walked by with a jaunty swing to her step, pinching his cheek as she went. “Come on... let's go back to the village now, and get some lunch. I'm starved!”
Sputtering, and totally incoherent at the way she'd completely brushed him off, he followed, not understanding her attraction to the bastard at all.
“Kagome,” he murmured, not willing to give up the subject.
“Inuyasha,” she chirped cheerily back, “get over it. Whatever happens between me and your brother stays there – it doesn't concern anyone else. I know you want to protect me, but you can't protect me from life – and this situation is a part of that. End of discussion.”
With a disgruntled growl, the hanyou finally gave up – for the time being, stomping into the hut behind her and accepting a bowl of stew from Kaede before sinking sullenly to the floor and proceeding to ignore Kagome and everyone else.
Kagome just shrugged and took her bowl of stew from Kaede with thanks, then turned and left the hut, choosing to go and eat under the trees at the edge of the forest where it was cooler. On a whim, she took her Ipod out of her obi and slipped her earphones on, in the mood to listen to some music.
She almost choked on her first bite of stew at the first song that came on... Oh, the irony... an American pop song called Right Kind of Wrong. She'd heard it quite some time back, and every time, it brought Sesshoumaru to her mind.
'… but I can't help it that I'm helpless everytime that I'm where you are... you walk in and my strength walks out the door, say my name and I can't fight it anymore...'*
A little smile crossed her face at those lyrics. Damned if they aren't dead on, too. Anytime he's around I'm a bumbling idiot – or at least, I feel like one. And when he says my name...!
She sighed, that silly little smile still on her face as she set her bowl aside and began singing along with the words. She really, really loved that song...
“A foreign language, Kagome?” came a silky baritone, and she cut off in mid-song, her heart jumping in her chest as Sesshoumaru's aura suddenly washed over her with all the potency and intoxication of opium.
Her head whipped up to stare at him, hand against her throat, but the words to chastise him caught in her throat at the sight of him; cold and pristine as he looked, it was deceiving – Sesshoumaru was heat and passion all hidden away behind a smokescreen. She watched with rapt attention as his fingers idly stroked through his hair sensously, before brushing the lock back over his shoulder, and whimpered softly – it just wasn't fair what this male could do to a woman without even trying.
Ignoring the speculative expression that settled on his face at her reaction, she forcibly wrenched her mind to his question. Clearing her throat, she said, “Yes. It's called English. In my era, it's pretty much the most spoken language in the world. I'm fairly fluent, though it's a rather strange language, and confusing to learn. They kind of talk backwards, and they read from left to right, instead of right to left like we do.”
“Hn. Odd, as you say. What other knowledge do you possess, I wonder?” he murmured, staring at her thoughtfully.
Kagome shivered at the heat that flashed through his eyes just for a second, her own brow furrowing in confusion at the sight. Why had he looked at her like that – even for just a moment?
“Umm, yeah...” she trailed off for a second, flustered, and then managed to recover herself and answer his question. “Well, I know a lot of different things... but there's even more that I don't know. The more I learned, the faster it became apparent how much I didn't know – and probably never would. There's so much knowledge out there,” she sighed, “that it's strictly impossible for one not the kami to know everything.”
“An esoteric answer – but correct, in any case. I am finding the same thing in my studies of a certain subject. The more I know of you, the more it seems there is to know.”
She stared at him for a moment, nonplussed, then stood up and, putting away her Ipod, started to walk back to Kaede's to gather the lunch dishes so they could be washed. It was a small chore for her, but it helped the elderly miko greatly, and she was glad to do it.
There was no surprise that Sesshoumaru chose to walk along beside her.
“You know... I really don't understand why you seem to find me so... fascinating. I'm just one more living thing in a world full of them. Why are you really so intent on digging up answers on me?” she asked, a frown crossing her face as she pondered her own question.
It was one that Sesshoumaru also found his attention drawn by. Why was he so determined to find out what she was?
Certainly, the answer that he had given her before was valid – she kept him from boredom with the mystery that was her. But... such a simple answer couldn't cover the depths of his determination to know her. So what was it? It was a question that a corner of his mind began to churn over, and it would continue to do so until he had his answer.
Of course, it went without saying that when he did get his answer, he would choose to keep it to himself – and let Kagome speculate over it as he had over her for so long. Let her be drawn closer to him by fascination with unanswered questions... just as he had been to her.
Fair was fair, after all.
Their quiet walk was broken by the appearance of a severely irritated Inuyasha, who couldn't resist antagonizing his brother.
“Feh,” he snapped out in disgust, “and here I was hoping you'd have gone away. Why the hell are you back, anyway? Don't you understand that it don't matter what Kagome is yet? She's just Kagome, and that's all that counts. There. Question answered, now you can go away.”
Inuyasha was determined to protect Kagome from the older brother he'd heard too many rumors of from a young age to trust. The male never differed in how he treated females – he got in, took what he wanted, then left without looking back. He probably had forgotten the face of the female five minutes after he'd left her – and Inuyasha couldn't stand the thought of what such a thing would do to Kagome's heart.
If the bastard wasn't so heartless, and he could be sure he was serious about her, much as Inuyasha hated the thought of them being together, he would step back. All he wanted was for Kagome to be happy.
He wasn't stupid – he knew she'd had feelings for him back during the quest for the jewel. But he couldn't see Kagome the same way, for some reason. Oh, he loved her, there was no denying that – but it wasn't a passionate love. And he was convinced that Kagome would one day find the one she was meant to be with. The thought that it might, just might, be his bastard of a brother, squicked him no end, but if it was meant to be, then he'd somehow come to terms with it. He would never stand in the way of her happiness.
But that was the problem – he had no way of knowing for sure that Sesshoumaru wanted more than a satiation of his curiosity, and maybe his libido, as well. With narrowed eyes, Inuyasha silently vowed that if his brother despoiled Kagome, and then left her as he had every other female he'd ever touched, he would find a way to kill him.
Kagome was no whore to be tossed aside once enjoyed.
He was brought back from his thoughts of vengeance by Kagome's sigh, and irritated sidelong glance at him. He folded his hands into his sleeves and huffed in acceptance of her silent demand to desist in harassing his brother – grudgingly.
Sesshoumaru knew full well what his brother's problem was, and though he found it amusing in a way, he had no intention of treating Kagome the way Inuyasha was worried he would.
No... what Inuyasha was missing was that he, Sesshoumaru, had always stuck with those females that were rather free with their favors, usually in hopes to trap a male to their sides. They were trying to use him, so he had no qualms in using them right back.
Kagome was another story altogether. He would never deflower a maiden of her status in such a manner – it would reflect the highest dishonor on him and his lineage. That wasn't even mentioning the fact that a one time tryst was nowhere near what he desired from her, anyway. He would never be satisfied with that.
But he wasn't about to enlighten the whelp – he should have been smart enough to figure it out. As usual, though, when the matter had anything to do with him, Inuyasha became irrational, and any intelligence he might have had went right out of his head.
Let him worry, and wonder. When I take her as mine, then he will know, and have no choice but to accept it.
He dismissed that line of thought, then, and his brother, both with indifference. After all, Inuyasha was not important in the scheme of things. He was a simple nuisance that could be – mostly – ignored.
“When you have seen to your chore, Kagome, I will find you.” At her questioning look, he asked, “I promised to show you the parts of my world that hold importance to me, did I not?”
Kagome's face brightened at that.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, you did. So you're going to take me today?” she asked eagerly.
The daiyoukai ignored his brother's rolled eyes and petulant pout, keeping his gaze pinned to Kagome. “I would not have mentioned it otherwise.”
“Okay!”
Both males watched silently as Kagome hurried off, a bright smile of anticipation on her face – at least until she was out of earshot.
“I have already warned you about interfering, Inuyasha – I will not do so again,” he said, his voice deadly as he palmed Bakusaiga pointedly, golden eyes slitted and icy. He wanted his brother to know the consequences of said interference.
Inuyasha's eyes narrowed just as much as his hand grasped Tessaiga in response. “Keh! And I'm warning you, Sesshoumaru – hurt Kagome, and I will find a way to kill you.” With that, he spun on his heel and walked off, leaving his brother behind him to watch with frigid eyes.
You are welcome to try, Inuyasha.
I almost dare you.
~oOo~
First annotation: I could not come up with a specific shrine for Omoikane, so I created one for this story strictly from my own imagination.
Second annotation: Honden – according to Japan guide.com, the honden is the main hall of the shrine, where the sacred artifact is usually kept in the innermost chamber.
Third annotation: Haiden – the offering hall. The honden and haiden could be one building, or two.
Fourth annotation: Shimenawa - A shimenawa is a straw rope with white zigzag paper strips (gohei). It marks the boundary to something sacred and can be found on torii gates, around sacred trees and stones, and the like. It is what the Goshinboku at Kagome's home shrine has wrapped around it in her era.
Fifth annotation: I do not own the rights to the song Right Kind of Wrong.
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Sesshoumaru let his thoughts drift as he flew – even at his current speed, it would take at least an hour to reach the extremely remote shrine of Omoikane in the northern mountains.* He had left Kagome in the village just that morning with barely a word, and he considered with amusement that his brother was probably thinking he had been satisfied in his curiosity, had decided he had no other interest in Kagome after all, and wouldn't be coming back.
He really looked forward to the disappointment on the whelp's face when he arrived back in the village once his current quest was completed. Such things, were, after all, pleasing to him.
Turning his mind away from that thought after a moment, he considered some of the things he wished to ask of the kami during this visit – if the god were willing to speak to him, of course. A rather sour look crossed his face at that thought – he was Sesshoumaru, and was not used to dealing with beings that stood above him, as there was usually no cause for him to have contact with the kami.
Even the visit to Kagome's time had strained him, a little – he was well aware that, as his equal, and there was no denying that she was, he could not act with his customary demanding nature in her time. Not even with her family – she would simply have never allowed him back, and that could not be countenanced – if he later decided he had other questions for her mother, or things he wanted to see in her time, he wanted access.
Being the tactician that he was, that he had been trained to be, he knew when the time for haughty demand was, and the time for peaceful parley, even if he did not like it. If anyone seeing his actions and manner in her time had questioned him, thinking he had changed, softened, they would be disappointed – he hadn't. He was still the terrible youkai Lord, the predator, dangerous and dark.
He had just subdued that part... temporarily, to gain his own ends.
At any rate, his biggest question to the kami of wisdom and intelligence – what was Kagome designed, created, to change?
Was there even any specific thing, or was she supposed to influence change in many things?
It seemed to him that the last idea held the most probability, but that did not mean it was the truth – the kami, after all, were rarely so straightforward in anything they did.
He frowned a bit as he thought of his previous ideas on time... and the effects her presence could possibly have on things. Is that it? Did the kami not like the shape of things as they had created them... so they created her to change that which they disliked? The things they had miscreated?
It was possible...
Eyes narrowing, he thought of what would greet him when he arrived at the shrine of the god. It would have to be handled delicately. He did not think threatening the lives of his priests and worshipers would be the way to gain audience with him – yet most likely, those same humans would not accept his presence, and would seek to keep him from entrance.
Humans... must they always make things so difficult? Perhaps entry into the shrine itself would not be necessary – after all, the kami would know of his presence in the area, without need of him actually entering his holy place.
It seems I would dare much in pursuit of my desires of this woman – not just of her, but of her origins. I would not have even begun to suspect what I would be willing to do for answers in the beginning. It makes me wonder just how much Bokuseno saw when I first went to him for answers.
His thoughts turned almost melancholy then, as his mind wandered into the distant past, and his father.
Did you know, somehow, father? Is that why you asked me such a question?
“Do you have someone to protect?”
Were you warned of how it would be with me in the future? That would explain Tenseiga, he mused. For if it had not been for that sword, I would not have learned of the value that... certain humans hold through Rin.
Not that Kagome is truly human, but still, the thought is there. She is not youkai, and I would not have held any value in one who was not before Tenseiga and Rin awoke that spark in me. He hesitated for a moment... No...
It was odd to admit to himself that the truth was even stranger than that.
He had not held any worth in anyone who was not him. For his opinion of even those youkai females alive today was low – they were not strong enough to impress him at all, with the exception of his own mother.
Even youkai males... he'd not found one worthy of his respect in all his years of wandering – the only one he even came close to having any for was Bokuseno himself.
After all, he'd fought countless youkai, male and female. Just look at the two females that had mistakenly attempted to take Tenseiga on Menomaru's orders while looking for Tessaiga. He flicked a lock of hair over his shoulder disdainfully at that thought – that one had been so weak that he hadn't even dared to face him, instead sending his servants to inevitably fall before him. And Magatsuhi... weak filth. To think that he would be capable of defeating one such as himself – it was ridiculous. Even the so-called Four War Gods. His opponent had fallen easily. That fight had been nothing but a waste of time and effort.
The strict truth was that none compared to his own strength and power, and he had the same attitude towards power - and the lack of it - that other youkai did. He could not find it in himself to respect one who was so far below him.
That had left him alone and untouchable on his pedestal above all the rest of creation – until certain odd facts about a young female began to infiltrate his mind... and then, it had been a foregone conclusion, really, that he would be instantly captivated by the only being, male or female, that had ever come close to his strength and power. And the mystery of her... of what she was... and now, of who she was – it was all designed to pull him in, mystify him, intrigue him.
There was no way he would have been able to resist an enticement such as Kagome Higurashi was turning out to be.
He palmed the hilt of Tenseiga, letting the sword hum to him calmly as he wondered about his father's possible knowledge of Kagome... and what she would be to him. It would not be so surprising to find that the elder Inu had known something of her; after all, his father was known for his meddling in all types of things, and had been quite capable of foreseeing certain future situations.
It is useless, however, he reluctantly decided, to worry over such things now. It is not as though I can get the answers to such questions – at least not at this time. Perhaps, another day, I can visit the underworld and find the answer to that, since Tenseiga is the key to the underworld, meidou or not.
His mind flashed with particular satisfaction to his memories of the guardians of the gate to the underworld, and their reaction to him and the sword he bore.
They had denied his half-breed brother entrance, and yet, had bowed to him, allowing him what he willed.
As it should be, he thought, idly stroking his pelt.
His reverie was broken as he began to feel the edges of a power much greater than his own, and realized that he was near his destination. Focusing sharply on the mountainside ahead of him, he carefully took note of the shrine. Aiming to land near the base of the stairs that led through the torii gate, he was slightly taken aback to take note of the head priest of the shrine standing at the top of the long staircase, as though waiting.
Allowing his cloud of youki to evaporate, he landed lightly at the foot of the stairs, watching silently the priest, to see what he would do.
He was somehow not surprised when the priest motioned slowly for him to advance up the stairs, and with narrowed eyes, he did so, alert for any hostile move from him, or any others that may be around.
There are no others, he realized after he swept the area with his senses. The only other humans in the area are inside the haiden.
I wonder...
Once he reached a spot just below the priest, he stopped, and waited. It was for the human to speak first – he would not give up his reasons for being here as though he were a supplicant asking for a human's permission to appeal to the kami.
“You are expected, proud youkai Lord,” came the voice of the human male, and Sesshoumaru quirked a brow, surprised, though he did not show it. The male answered the look. “Omoikane-kami-sama spoke to this servant this very morning and told him to prepare for your visit. Please, follow me,” he said, politely enough.
Sesshoumaru said nothing, simply following the male up to the gate, where he paused out of necessary respect and purified his hands and mouth in the purification trough that sat just inside the inu guarded gate. It would not do, after all, to insult the god.
He looked around, taking note of everything curiously. It appeared to be much as most such places were, the honden* and haiden* combined into one large building, elaborately carved. His attention was caught for a moment by a strong aura of power emanating from a large tree to the side of the shrine – that it was sacred was denoted by the shimenawa* wrapped around it.
Sacred to the god, it seems, he thought. Remembering the sacred tree at Kagome's family shrine, he smiled most ironically. So the kami have a particular love of trees. Bokuseno must enjoy that fact.
Emulating the priest, he bowed as they entered the honden, though not quite as deeply, of course. As soon as he stood back up, the priest nodded and turned and left, closing the shoji quietly behind him. Sesshoumaru dismissed his presence from his mind the moment he was gone, and instead contented himself with waiting for the god to show himself – he would not have gone to such lengths to have him greeted if he were going to avoid him, after all.
There was no sound or flare of power to give away Omoikane's entrance.
“So... the great youkai Lord Sesshoumaru comes to the courts of the gods to request answers.” There was a light, almost sarcastic emphasis on the word request.
Sesshoumaru refused to let the fact that he had been caught off-guard show, though it was a wasted effort; the kami knew quite well that he had been. Still, he would not react noticeably. Bearing was the most important thing in any dealings with those of such power as the gods.
“Does this surprise you, then?” he asked calmly as he turned to face the god. “This one is well aware that the kami plan for everything – it is easy to understand that you knew from the beginning that he would.”
Omoikane watched the daiyoukai through heavily-lidded eyes, amusement shining in the flashes of them that were visible.
“True, true. And if we had not known, your sire would have told us.” At the spark in Sesshoumaru's eyes, he chuckled. “Did you not know, then, that your father would be ever just as vigilant over his sons in death, as he was in life?”
Considering that piece of information carefully for a moment, Sesshoumaru did not answer the god, instead asking, “Will I gain any answers here this day, or will you simply amuse yourself with my presence?”
At that, the god sobered, and a stern look crossed his face. “It is not the place of any of those bound to the earth to question what we choose to do or not do, Sesshoumaru. You are powerful - but you are not a god. Do not forget your place.” After a few moments, when the daiyoukai merely continued to watch him, he sighed, and gestured for him to follow.
Sesshoumaru did so; keeping his eyes pinned to the kami, he did not notice how they were suddenly in another place for several moments, the shrine simply disappearing from around them as though it had never been.
When he finally did notice, curious, he looked around, wondering at where the god had brought him. It was a strange place...
All around them, mist flowed steadily, weaving in and out of the peaks and valleys of a mountain range that Sesshoumaru was certain did not actually exist – at least not in his native land. It was beautiful, but strange, the aura of the place flowing with more power than he'd ever felt before in his life, and he was quite suddenly aware that there were many kami here in these mountains.
After a time of silence, Omoikane allowing Sesshoumaru to take in all that was around him, and the feel and aura's of some of the other gods and goddesses, he spoke once more. “This is our place,” he gestured gently. “It does not exist, as I'm sure you are aware, within your realms. It is here that we first debated the creation of change.” He laid a peculiar emphasis on that word, catching Sesshoumaru's attention.
“Change?” he murmured questioningly, hoping the god would expound on that statement. He did.
“Yes. The world was decaying, in a sense. When we created it, everything within it moved at a certain speed. And that was as it should be. However, after a time, that speed began to slow... the changes that should have taken place within our creation at set times, began to fail, until nothing changed any more.” He stopped speaking, his dark, knowing eyes looking out over his paradise for a time as he contemplated things Sesshoumaru had never had a need to.
“Change is necessary, as I am sure you are aware. Without it, the world began to die. That was not part of our plan – so we needed to create something that could fix that problem. Some of us...” he trailed off with a sigh, silent for a second, then picked up his words once more, “wanted to let your world destroy itself, and start again. But... most of us did not. And so... we came together, here, and began to debate. What could we do, to save our creation?”
Fascinated, Sesshoumaru barely moved, not wanting to miss one word of what was being said, even as the god turned once more to look at him.
“Some of us soon came to a conclusion, and once we managed to persuade the majority of the rest of the kami, we set our plans in motion. You have seen the results of our labors... Kagome. You were correct, in your assumptions that she was created to bring change to everything she touches. But there is much mystery to her, still – even we kami do not know everything she is for, or all that she is capable of.”
Brow rising into his bangs in near shock, Sesshoumaru asked, “You made her a mystery even to yourselves?”
Omoikane laughed, and to Sesshoumaru's surprise, suddenly, it wasn't the same kami he had been speaking to. Instead, a female voice responded, though her aspect remained hidden, those swirling mists hiding the kami's morphing form from his eyes. “It was necessary, son of the Taisho. In order to be effective, Kagome had to be free to effect change on her own, with no guidance from us – or it would not be true change, merely the will of one or possibly more of us.”
Is it not the will of the gods that makes the world run the way that it does?
“No,” yet another voice answered his thought. “We created the world – but we have better things to do than to sit over it to make sure things continue to go the way we wanted. The less interference, the better, after all. And there are other realms, other realities to create, you know. There is an entire universe out there, Sesshoumaru, and it is endless. We do not have any desire to remain only here.”
“That is why you created Kagome, then,” he murmured in a tone of discovery, though he was really speaking to himself. “She is here to do what you do not want to do yourselves – she is here to watch over this part of your creation.”
“In essence, yes,” a chorale of voices answered him, “though there is a bit more to it than that. The gods do not change things, Sesshoumaru – we create instruments of change, such as Kagome, and then let them do what we created them to do.”
He looked up, then, from the ground beneath him that he had been staring at, deep in thought. “So then – what is Kagome Higurashi? I know what she is supposed to do now, in a general way, but that still does not answer what she is.”
“Is that so important? What are you, Sesshoumaru? What is anything? Kagome was right – too often, people, youkai and human, miss out on the truth of things in this creation because of their need to define everything. Some things have no definition – they just are. She is what she was created to be. It is enough,” the voices said, before the form of the kami before him once more became Omoikane.
“Think of her as an avatar of the gods, Sesshoumaru, and you will not be far off. But by trying to define her as either youkai or human, you are failing to understand – there is much in creation that is neither of those two things,” he said gently.
“You are blessed of the kami, Sesshoumaru – none besides your father himself has received such a clear answer to your question. If you choose to continue searching for more clearly defined answers, your search will no longer lie in the realms of the gods – we have said all we have to say on the subject.”
As the gods words faded in the air around him, he found himself once more standing inside the honden, alone, just as though he'd never left. Taking a long moment to gather his thoughts after such a strange visit, he looked around once more at the plain room he stood in, and then turned, letting himself out, avoiding any contact with the priests that guarded the shrine. He had no desire to speak to another at this point in time; he wanted to find a quiet place and contemplate all he had been told. He frowned for a moment as he took flight from the top of the shrine stairs – he had not had a chance to ask certain of his questions, though in the end it did not matter, as the kami had answered only what they had seen fit to answer, anyway.
Aggravating... but not unexpected.
He had to admit, what he had been given was, in a way, more than he had expected. He could take consolation in that, at the very least.
~oOo~
She is an avatar of the gods, or close enough to one... and that is all that they are willing to tell me – the only attribute they will give her. And she was created to effect change, but on a much larger scale than I had expected.
Truly... she is change. He thought about that for a while, his mind so preoccupied that he did not even pay any attention to the beautiful view of the lands stretching away before him. He was blinded to the wonder around him by the wonder that was Kagome.
So, she was created to be the answer of the kami to the loss of change in creation. That means that her influence is impossible to define – it is too large. Does she know the extent of things? Somehow... I doubt it.
It seemed to him that the kami had allowed Kagome free reign over their creation, but she was doing what she was supposed to on instinct, rather than actual knowledge. She had no full-knowledge of what she was, or the things she could do. At least not yet.
I can understand the kami's reasons for doing things in such a manner – after all, her untutored responses to the stimuli around her were what the kami wanted.
But what he did not understand was the reference by Omoikane-kami-sama to his father. Why did he deliberately bring father into our discussion? What does father have to do with this whole thing?
It occurred to him then, that in a roundabout way, perhaps the kami was giving him the nod that his father did, indeed, have some answers? After all, he had already considered going to the underworld to confront his sire about his reasons for Tenseiga. It just seemed so convenient – to have given him a sword he would have had no use for... under normal circumstances. It wasn't as if Tenseiga wouldn't have worked just as well to subdue Inuyasha's youkai blood – so that couldn't be the only reason that instead, it had been he, Sesshoumaru, to receive it.
It seems as if father was more involved with this situation than I had thought, if the kami-sama are bringing it to my attention.
He narrowed thoughtful eyes still blind to the scenery on the blue expanse of the sky above himself, his mind moving swiftly to a conclusion.
Yes... I think it is time to use the Tenseiga for something more than restoring lives. It is a key to the underworld, the fang of heaven – and so I will use it as such. A key.
It is time to visit father...
I would have an answer to the question of Tenseiga... and perhaps, a few other things as well.
Decision made, he stood and leapt from the precipice he had been sitting on, heading for the Gates to the Underworld. He would once more face them...
And their guardians.
~oOo~
Once more standing before the stone portal that guarded the underworld, Sesshoumaru drew Tenseiga, and the gate began to open, its bright light only emphasizing the huge stone guardians on their knees behind him. He paid them no more attention than he did the last time he visited – at least, after they had backed down and left him to access the underworld at his will.
Taking to flight once more after sheathing the sword, Sesshoumaru headed straight for his father's remains, knowing now that with Tenseiga, he could commune with his father's spirit anytime he so chose.
Not that he would often be bothered to make the trip just for casual chat, but when necessary... he looked around at the odd, and rather bleak, threshold of the underworld that his father now called home, and shivered just a little – he would not like to be forced to exist in this empty place.
Then again, he allowed to himself, it wasn't truly empty, and his father was no longer one of the living – it was very possible that he was quite comfortable in this place. It was a question to ask... one of simple curiosity, unlike his other questions.
Within minutes, he arrived before the gigantic skeletal remains of his father, trapped in a halfway transformed state. He wondered about that – it appeared as though he had died right in the midst of his transformation, a decidedly odd thing. For had he not died in the burning remains of the shiro of Inuyasha's mother, fighting with Takemaru, and chasing him into hell at both their deaths? What had actually occurred during those last few moments of life... and why was his fang still broken?
That question paused him in his tracks, setting aside all other questions in his mind. Yes, he knew that his father had used a fang to seal Ryokotsussei – but his father had lived for several hours after that, and that broken fang would have healed within minutes, even considering his mortal wound. In fact, even the wound had not in and of itself been fatal for a being as powerful as his father – it had only become so because of his determination to reach the human woman and his further battles to get to her side. If he had gone to rest himself, he would have been fine.
It was that very thing that had so angered him about Inuyasha's existence – if not for the whelp, his sire would still be among the living. At least, it was one of several reasons for his dislike of his half-brother...
That particular angst was long past, however; the Inu no Taisho had chosen his own fate, and it held no purpose to blame another for his choices. Setting that aside, his brow furrowed as he considered his father's remains with a rather discerning eye. Everything else appeared intact, save that one fang... and since it should have already repaired itself before his death, he had to wonder – what had happened to it? If it had remained at the site of his death, for whatever reason, it would have been known due to its sheer size – unless it was in another state, he thought suddenly, his hand idly stroking over Tenseiga's wrapped hilt.
Is that it, father? Was there some purpose to you giving up another fang in the moments before your death? Or was it even earlier – before you met up with Myoga, and he tried to reason with you? It seems the mystery surrounding your death deepens, just as the one around Kagome herself does. For every answer that is gained, a new one takes its place.
Eyes narrowing, he reached across and drew the sword with an elegance that none now living but he could effect, and as its power thrummed through the air, gathering in the sword in a cascade of brilliant light. After letting the power build for a moment, he swung it with a fierceness rarely seen in him, unleashing the full might of the Tenseiga – his father's fang, for the very first time.
The power flared, at first exploding outward from the blade to encompass the entire area, making his clothing and hair billow with the force of it, then it spread out in a cascading corona to surround all of his father's massive remains...
And the entire verge of the underworld shook with the demand that came from Tenseiga, as its hold on the one known as the Inu no Taisho loosened, allowing his soul to break free and heed the clarion call of the Fang of Heaven.
Sesshoumaru watched in silent awe as the true power of the Sword was revealed, his father's soul infusing his remains with an explosion of youki that shook the underworld even more, his terrible and massive spirit surrounding his skeleton with a whirlwind of sheer force, obscuring it from view for several long moments.
When it cleared...
His father stood before him once more, his remains no longer where they had been for over two centuries. And Sesshoumaru was left with eyes widened as he dropped his gaze to stare at the sword, completely taken aback at the power that he had been carrying around for so long – all along thinking it nearly useless.
“I never knew,” he murmured to himself.
“Was it useless because the forging of it did not take innocent blood, as did your Tokijin, Sesshoumaru?” came his father's voice, after a moment of silence. Sesshoumaru looked up, then, meeting the golden eyes of the male he'd for so long aspired to be, and stared at him, for once in his life, not sure how to answer.
“The innocent blood that was used to create that devil sword you wielded for so long... tell me, then – what of your Rin? She could very well have shared those innocents fate in meeting that blade, rather than the one she did receive meeting Tenseiga, instead. So, now... which blade has more power? Which is worth more? The sword that kills, or the sword that denies death its victory, and triumphs where none other could?”
Still stunned, but unwilling to stumble before his sire, he shook his shock away, and tried to formulate his thoughts. “I have already grasped the fallacies in creating and wielding a sword the likes of Tokijin, father – which is why, though I did not gain Tessaiga from Inuyasha, I simply went without a sword save Tenseiga after Tokijin was destroyed.”
His sire eyed him, then nodded. “Yes, it is apparent, by the fact that your arm has been returned to you – and the sword that now sings at your side. Its song is much more pleasing than Tokijin's ever was. But still, the question needed to be asked. For even until just a few moments ago, you were still blinded to the truth of the other blade you have carried for so long. You are not usually so slow to catch on, Sesshoumaru. Was your mind, perhaps, taken by some other interest, to the exclusion of all else?” he asked knowingly.
And that was when Sesshoumaru knew for sure that his father, had, indeed, known something of Kagome... and what his interest in her would be.
“You are alive,” he said bluntly, the question obvious within his statement, and his sire nodded.
“I could be, if I so chose. Tenseiga has given me that choice. But my life is done, and I will remain here. Returning me to life was not the point of Tenseiga's creation, my son. You have always been stubborn. Tenseiga was my answer to that.” The Inu no Taisho smiled, a subtle amusement sharpening his gaze just slightly. “If I had simply told you what was to be, you would have disdained it simply to spite me, personal beliefs of humans aside. No... you were never amenable to simply being given the truth. You had to be led, slowly, to the answers. Does that anger you? That I knew what I did, even so long ago, and prepared for it?”
The younger daiyoukai knew exactly what his father was alluding to – Kagome. So, since he had opened the door... “How did you know?”
“How did I know any of what I knew, Sesshoumaru? How did I create the Tenseiga to defeat death from my own fang? Is death and rebirth not the province of the kami? The decision to create the woman and her actual creation did not happen in a short time. The gods do not work on our time scale. It covered eons... and they made sure to set everything in motion that would be needed, or that was deemed necessary – including her reward for doing the duty the kami gave to her.”
Reward? Sesshoumaru frowned inwardly at that, not sure he liked what his father's words were intimating. I was created... as her... reward? Is that all I am, then? “And I am just to accept this fate, then? A reward for a creation of the kami – something they made to fix their own mistakes?” he asked, his manner suddenly stony.
And his father laughed at him.
“Sesshoumaru, have you not yet realized that we are all created with some purpose? Nothing in this creation of the kami is purposeless, though most never know for sure what that purpose was, and pass on just as clueless as they came in. And some have very negative purposes – Naraku comes to mind. His reward... is definitely not one that any would aspire to. Is your purpose then so unpleasant, when you had already accepted it – before you even knew of it? Your choice was your own, Sesshoumaru, have no fear of that.” He sighed at his son's deepening cold. “Just because the kami knew what your choice would be, does not mean they made if for you. Tell me... your little ward. There are things that you know about her – how she will react to certain stimuli, yes?”
Attention arrested, Sesshoumaru stared at his father. “Yes...” he trailed off.
“Does that mean that you have made the choice for her, then, in any given circumstance?”
Just that quickly, Sesshoumaru's thoughts froze, and he completely forgot himself, lost in his own mind as he took in his father's words.
Surely not... it is simple sophistry that father uses to confuse me. It is not the same at all, for I did not create Rin to answer to a purpose of my own. But then his conscience pricked him, and he delved deeper into his own mind. No... I did not create Rin, but I did save her for my own purposes, did I not? Is it not then almost the same thing? I like not being someone's reward, however... this one is not a 'prize' to be won by obedience to the gods.
He told his father just that, too.
Yet again, his sire had an answer.
“Do you not understand, pup, that she is also your reward?”
He could hear the displeasure in his father's voice at his recalcitrance, and narrowed his eyes.
“Reward?” he murmured. “For what? What have I done that the kami would think to reward me?” he asked, sarcasm coating his tone.
“You are – slowly, admittedly – becoming what you were meant to be,” he said wryly. “Would you prefer to be punished, instead, for refusing yourself your own happiness, simply for spite? I would have thought that after all this time, Sesshoumaru, you would have learned not to fight against fate simply because it is preordained. Must you be so willful? Would you cut off your nose to spite your face?”
“Why did you facilitate the plans of the kami in regards this matter, father? Did they really need your interference, your gift of this fang, to get me to cooperate in their plans?”
The great and deadly General looked at his son with sadness in his eyes. “Is it wrong, then,” he murmured, “for a father to wish to see his son happy? Would you not do what you could to give the child Rin the same? Do not tell me no, Sesshoumaru – I have seen the things you have done for that child. Tell me, why is it so wrong for me to have done the same?”
That question, combined with the look in his father's eyes, caused guilt to swell sharply within him, and he growled, not used to such a useless emotion. He was not one to regret, or to feel guilt in his dealings with others – at least, not very often. He didn't like it now, either, but could find no defense against it.
Because his father was right. He had forgotten what it was like to have a parent, his mother aside, one that cared for him, in his life. It had been so long since he had felt such a thing, for even before his death, the circumstances of the General's liaison with Inuyasha's mother, and his preoccupation with his second son's impending birth, had caused him to push away from his sire. Only within his own mind could he admit the reason for his reaction to the sibling he had hated from the moment of his conception – simple jealousy.
He had wanted to keep his father for himself.
Sharing, at least at that point, hadn't been something he'd been very good at. It still wasn't – though he was a bit better at it now.
He had, at least, learned some things in the intervening years.
Tacitly giving his father the ground on that matter, he instead asked, “And the broken fang?”
Taking Sesshoumaru's change of subject for exactly what it meant, his father nodded at him, understanding his question. “A minor matter, Sesshoumaru – there is no mystery there. What do you think Saia used to seal Sou'unga for those five hundred years? My fang, broken or not, worked quite well to keep his evil energy sealed away – for a time, anyway.”
“Hn.” He considered his sire for several seconds. “And Kagome? Will I ever have the answer to the Lotus?”
At that, his father laughed again, his eyes lit with mirth as he shook his head at his son. “Have you not already been told, repeatedly, Sesshoumaru? She is. That is the answer to the Lotus, as Bokuseno so aptly named her. She is mystery, yes – but she is also truth. She is an avatar of the gods, she is change personified. She is. What else is there? No, she is not youkai, no, she is not kami, and no, she is not really even human. It does not matter. Some mysteries were not meant to be known – or they would not be mysteries. If she could be so easily explained, she would not be the Lotus, ne?”
His eyes lowered to the rock beneath his feet, and his mind churned with his father's words. Is it really so pointless to question, then? For his words are correct – not every mystery can be known. Some things need no answers... is she truly one of them?
But then again... there is an answer. She is change personified, is what father said. I am the personification of my youki... it is not so different, I suppose.
He sighed aloud, something he rarely did, and his eyes once more focused on his sire as he accepted his elder's words. After all, he had already decided that it did not matter to his desires towards her – and even knowing that the kami had created him for her, did not, in the end, change his mind.
He still wanted her.
At least he was assured that he would have her, though that had never really been a question in his mind. He almost always got what he wanted.
“You are sure that you will remain here?”
The mighty Inu no Taisho merely nodded, saying not another word.
Sesshoumaru watched his father for a moment, then inclined his head in a silent goodbye and took to the air, his mind so full of what he had learned this day, and all that had happened, that he did not even think to try to convince his sire to return to the earth with him.
~oOo~
As morning gave way to afternoon, Sesshoumaru stirred slightly from his contemplation of all that had passed that day, finally taking in the view he had always loved. High above the surrounding lands, the vantage point he was currently standing on was his favorite place in all the West. From it, he could see clearly over almost the entirety of the northern half of his lands.
It was a place he spent a great deal of time, truthfully, especially when his mind was unsettled as it had been this day. But as always, a sojourn here soothed him, allowing him to once more turn himself back to his usual calm, collected persona.
I will bring Kagome here. She would enjoy the view, as well, I believe – and I did say I would show her the things I consider important in my world, as she did for me in hers.
The thought of bringing her here did not displease him, on the contrary, sharing a place so sacred to himself with her seemed right, as if it were something that should be done.
Perhaps it is... he thought idly. His mind then turned back to his meeting with his father, and he frowned, annoyed with himself. He'd once more allowed his sire to knock him off-kilter, and that was unacceptable. In all his centuries, his father was the only one to be able to do that – and it had always made him feel like a pup with little experience of the world.
Even now, it was the same. From the first few words, his father had had him at a disadvantage, and kept him there. It frustrated Sesshoumaru that he had still not managed to meet his sire on equal ground. Though he had recovered better, and quicker, this time than ever before, so that was some ground gained, at least.
With an inward sigh, he once more gathered his ice around himself, then centered his mind, taking to the air to return to Inuyasha's village.
It was time to go back to the source of all his questions – and recent frustrations.
Kagome...
~oOo~
Kagome sighed, chin in hand as she rolled her eyes at her hanyou best friend.
He'd been ranting and lecturing all morning – ever since Sesshoumaru had up and disappeared without a single word.
And frankly, it was getting old.
“Inuyasha.”
Mid-rant, Inuyasha froze – when Kagome spoke in that tone, nothing good came of it, and he knew it. “What?” he asked cautiously, eyeing her nervously.
“If, as you are so convinced, Sesshoumaru has seen the error of his ways, and has left, having no more interest in me, why are you still carrying on about how I should push him away and avoid him?” she asked as she watched him, a rather bored expression on her face that didn't fool him for a minute.
“Keh! All I'm sayin' is, if he does come back, you gotta watch your back,” he responded. “Just to be on the safe side. Come on, Kagome – you know what he's like – a woman like you wouldn't be good for his 'reputation',” he spat, “even if you aren't exactly human like we all thought. You ain't youkai, either – and that's all he'll care about.” He blushed and looked away, then, not able to meet her eyes. “I know you're attracted to him, and... I just want you to be safe,” he finally sighed, still looking elsewhere. “I don't want to see him use you and then throw you away.”
He was stunned to hear her laugh. Whipping his head back around to stare at her, he gaped at the mirth in her eyes.
“Oh, Inuyasha. Why ever would Sesshoumaru of all people want a 'one-night stand' with me? I'm sure he's got better things to do than me,” she giggled, absolutely loving the gape-jawed expression on his face at her less than proper quip. “Lighten up. Everything will work out just fine, you'll see. You need to calm down about your brother – all this excitement isn't good for you.”
She stood up from the stump she'd been sitting on while he'd lectured her, and walked by with a jaunty swing to her step, pinching his cheek as she went. “Come on... let's go back to the village now, and get some lunch. I'm starved!”
Sputtering, and totally incoherent at the way she'd completely brushed him off, he followed, not understanding her attraction to the bastard at all.
“Kagome,” he murmured, not willing to give up the subject.
“Inuyasha,” she chirped cheerily back, “get over it. Whatever happens between me and your brother stays there – it doesn't concern anyone else. I know you want to protect me, but you can't protect me from life – and this situation is a part of that. End of discussion.”
With a disgruntled growl, the hanyou finally gave up – for the time being, stomping into the hut behind her and accepting a bowl of stew from Kaede before sinking sullenly to the floor and proceeding to ignore Kagome and everyone else.
Kagome just shrugged and took her bowl of stew from Kaede with thanks, then turned and left the hut, choosing to go and eat under the trees at the edge of the forest where it was cooler. On a whim, she took her Ipod out of her obi and slipped her earphones on, in the mood to listen to some music.
She almost choked on her first bite of stew at the first song that came on... Oh, the irony... an American pop song called Right Kind of Wrong. She'd heard it quite some time back, and every time, it brought Sesshoumaru to her mind.
'… but I can't help it that I'm helpless everytime that I'm where you are... you walk in and my strength walks out the door, say my name and I can't fight it anymore...'*
A little smile crossed her face at those lyrics. Damned if they aren't dead on, too. Anytime he's around I'm a bumbling idiot – or at least, I feel like one. And when he says my name...!
She sighed, that silly little smile still on her face as she set her bowl aside and began singing along with the words. She really, really loved that song...
“A foreign language, Kagome?” came a silky baritone, and she cut off in mid-song, her heart jumping in her chest as Sesshoumaru's aura suddenly washed over her with all the potency and intoxication of opium.
Her head whipped up to stare at him, hand against her throat, but the words to chastise him caught in her throat at the sight of him; cold and pristine as he looked, it was deceiving – Sesshoumaru was heat and passion all hidden away behind a smokescreen. She watched with rapt attention as his fingers idly stroked through his hair sensously, before brushing the lock back over his shoulder, and whimpered softly – it just wasn't fair what this male could do to a woman without even trying.
Ignoring the speculative expression that settled on his face at her reaction, she forcibly wrenched her mind to his question. Clearing her throat, she said, “Yes. It's called English. In my era, it's pretty much the most spoken language in the world. I'm fairly fluent, though it's a rather strange language, and confusing to learn. They kind of talk backwards, and they read from left to right, instead of right to left like we do.”
“Hn. Odd, as you say. What other knowledge do you possess, I wonder?” he murmured, staring at her thoughtfully.
Kagome shivered at the heat that flashed through his eyes just for a second, her own brow furrowing in confusion at the sight. Why had he looked at her like that – even for just a moment?
“Umm, yeah...” she trailed off for a second, flustered, and then managed to recover herself and answer his question. “Well, I know a lot of different things... but there's even more that I don't know. The more I learned, the faster it became apparent how much I didn't know – and probably never would. There's so much knowledge out there,” she sighed, “that it's strictly impossible for one not the kami to know everything.”
“An esoteric answer – but correct, in any case. I am finding the same thing in my studies of a certain subject. The more I know of you, the more it seems there is to know.”
She stared at him for a moment, nonplussed, then stood up and, putting away her Ipod, started to walk back to Kaede's to gather the lunch dishes so they could be washed. It was a small chore for her, but it helped the elderly miko greatly, and she was glad to do it.
There was no surprise that Sesshoumaru chose to walk along beside her.
“You know... I really don't understand why you seem to find me so... fascinating. I'm just one more living thing in a world full of them. Why are you really so intent on digging up answers on me?” she asked, a frown crossing her face as she pondered her own question.
It was one that Sesshoumaru also found his attention drawn by. Why was he so determined to find out what she was?
Certainly, the answer that he had given her before was valid – she kept him from boredom with the mystery that was her. But... such a simple answer couldn't cover the depths of his determination to know her. So what was it? It was a question that a corner of his mind began to churn over, and it would continue to do so until he had his answer.
Of course, it went without saying that when he did get his answer, he would choose to keep it to himself – and let Kagome speculate over it as he had over her for so long. Let her be drawn closer to him by fascination with unanswered questions... just as he had been to her.
Fair was fair, after all.
Their quiet walk was broken by the appearance of a severely irritated Inuyasha, who couldn't resist antagonizing his brother.
“Feh,” he snapped out in disgust, “and here I was hoping you'd have gone away. Why the hell are you back, anyway? Don't you understand that it don't matter what Kagome is yet? She's just Kagome, and that's all that counts. There. Question answered, now you can go away.”
Inuyasha was determined to protect Kagome from the older brother he'd heard too many rumors of from a young age to trust. The male never differed in how he treated females – he got in, took what he wanted, then left without looking back. He probably had forgotten the face of the female five minutes after he'd left her – and Inuyasha couldn't stand the thought of what such a thing would do to Kagome's heart.
If the bastard wasn't so heartless, and he could be sure he was serious about her, much as Inuyasha hated the thought of them being together, he would step back. All he wanted was for Kagome to be happy.
He wasn't stupid – he knew she'd had feelings for him back during the quest for the jewel. But he couldn't see Kagome the same way, for some reason. Oh, he loved her, there was no denying that – but it wasn't a passionate love. And he was convinced that Kagome would one day find the one she was meant to be with. The thought that it might, just might, be his bastard of a brother, squicked him no end, but if it was meant to be, then he'd somehow come to terms with it. He would never stand in the way of her happiness.
But that was the problem – he had no way of knowing for sure that Sesshoumaru wanted more than a satiation of his curiosity, and maybe his libido, as well. With narrowed eyes, Inuyasha silently vowed that if his brother despoiled Kagome, and then left her as he had every other female he'd ever touched, he would find a way to kill him.
Kagome was no whore to be tossed aside once enjoyed.
He was brought back from his thoughts of vengeance by Kagome's sigh, and irritated sidelong glance at him. He folded his hands into his sleeves and huffed in acceptance of her silent demand to desist in harassing his brother – grudgingly.
Sesshoumaru knew full well what his brother's problem was, and though he found it amusing in a way, he had no intention of treating Kagome the way Inuyasha was worried he would.
No... what Inuyasha was missing was that he, Sesshoumaru, had always stuck with those females that were rather free with their favors, usually in hopes to trap a male to their sides. They were trying to use him, so he had no qualms in using them right back.
Kagome was another story altogether. He would never deflower a maiden of her status in such a manner – it would reflect the highest dishonor on him and his lineage. That wasn't even mentioning the fact that a one time tryst was nowhere near what he desired from her, anyway. He would never be satisfied with that.
But he wasn't about to enlighten the whelp – he should have been smart enough to figure it out. As usual, though, when the matter had anything to do with him, Inuyasha became irrational, and any intelligence he might have had went right out of his head.
Let him worry, and wonder. When I take her as mine, then he will know, and have no choice but to accept it.
He dismissed that line of thought, then, and his brother, both with indifference. After all, Inuyasha was not important in the scheme of things. He was a simple nuisance that could be – mostly – ignored.
“When you have seen to your chore, Kagome, I will find you.” At her questioning look, he asked, “I promised to show you the parts of my world that hold importance to me, did I not?”
Kagome's face brightened at that.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, you did. So you're going to take me today?” she asked eagerly.
The daiyoukai ignored his brother's rolled eyes and petulant pout, keeping his gaze pinned to Kagome. “I would not have mentioned it otherwise.”
“Okay!”
Both males watched silently as Kagome hurried off, a bright smile of anticipation on her face – at least until she was out of earshot.
“I have already warned you about interfering, Inuyasha – I will not do so again,” he said, his voice deadly as he palmed Bakusaiga pointedly, golden eyes slitted and icy. He wanted his brother to know the consequences of said interference.
Inuyasha's eyes narrowed just as much as his hand grasped Tessaiga in response. “Keh! And I'm warning you, Sesshoumaru – hurt Kagome, and I will find a way to kill you.” With that, he spun on his heel and walked off, leaving his brother behind him to watch with frigid eyes.
You are welcome to try, Inuyasha.
I almost dare you.
~oOo~
First annotation: I could not come up with a specific shrine for Omoikane, so I created one for this story strictly from my own imagination.
Second annotation: Honden – according to Japan guide.com, the honden is the main hall of the shrine, where the sacred artifact is usually kept in the innermost chamber.
Third annotation: Haiden – the offering hall. The honden and haiden could be one building, or two.
Fourth annotation: Shimenawa - A shimenawa is a straw rope with white zigzag paper strips (gohei). It marks the boundary to something sacred and can be found on torii gates, around sacred trees and stones, and the like. It is what the Goshinboku at Kagome's home shrine has wrapped around it in her era.
Fifth annotation: I do not own the rights to the song Right Kind of Wrong.
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