InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ For Such a Time As This ❯ The Winds of Fate ( Chapter 4 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Disclaimer: *hides Miroku-sama behind her back* What, me? No, couldn't possibly be-aaaahhhhhh! *Slap* Nope, not me at all.
Warnings: A little bit of Kagome OOC-ness
A/N: silly me, I got the name of Kagome's friend wrong. Ayame is a MALE character from Fruits Basket, where as Ayumi is Kagome's friend. Is changed in previous chapters
Translations: I'll put these here, because there are some words that you need to know before the end of the chapter. (some of these definitions I am not certain of, but when I say it, this is what I mean.)
Baka-usually translated as idiot, but can mean stupid or foolish as well. NOT much of an insult at all
Yocatta-"I'm glad" or "Thank goodness" small prayer to a god in thanks.
Youki- a youkai's "signature" how a spiritualist can tell one youkai from another. (It's what Miroku "senses" in people's houses when he wants someplace to stay for the night)
Jyaki- the youkai equivalent to a monk's or miko's powers, generally VERY nasty. Also can indicate the presence of a ghost
Ofuda- the little pieces of paper that monks and mikos use to fight spirits and/or seal things
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For Such a Time as This
Chapter 4: The Winds of Fate
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'Even if, being as careful as I was' Kagome thought, dazed. 'I still managed to change the past, how am I ever going to fix things?' She sat there, pondering, wondering about her options. Finally she gave up and went to seek out a higher authority, one that had never failed her in giving good advice, and one whose judgment she trusted completely.
"Mama?" Kagome called, poking her head into the kitchen. "Can I talk to you for a bit?"
"Sure," her mother replied, drying off her hands.
"I'm going to explain something to you," Kagome began, "and it may sound a little crazy, but I want you to hear me out."
"Crazier then the fact that I have a daughter who happened to go through the family well into the past to fight youkai?" Eyes twinkling, her mother prepared some tea for the both of them.
Her daughter only answered with a cynical laugh. At her raised eyebrow, Kagome said, "It can get much crazier, Mama."
"Kagome, what's wrong?" the woman replied. "You seem different than yesterday."
"I've lived at least two days since then, Mama," Kagome responded. She pushed ruthlessly on. "Each day I would wake up at my desk with a startlingly vivid dream of the previous day. And each day I would jump through the well to end up in the past. But it wouldn't be my past, or at least not the past I was expecting. What happens now when I jump through the well is that I end up further back in the past then I should. I always go back to the same day, but when I wake up I'm back here."
"Ok," her mom thought for a second. "So you keep reliving the same day in the past, and you come back here, even if you don't go through the well?"
"Yes," Kagome nodded, happy to be understood. "I need some advice on what to do. I unintentionally changed the past the first time, but when I tried to fix things, it only ended up being worse."
"Is there anything particularly special about the day you go back to?" her mother mused.
"Other than everyone and their grandmother's second cousin showing up to fight Inuyasha, not really. There weren't any major battles, and we didn't find out any crucial information. It was just a day," Kagome huffed, frustrated.
"But it sounds like a very eventful day," her mother said. "Maybe you are supposed to change something about that day. If there were a lot of people there that day, you have a lot of elements to work with. It sounds like you have time to find the right combination of elements to break the loop."
"Okay," Kagome said dubiously.
"How do you know that you have changed the past?" Her mother asked after a moment of silence.
"All of... yesterday, I guess, I wrote in a journal that Ayumi gave me. The contents of the journal change when I change the past. I don't exactly know what happens to those who are not in the journal, but I know who has died. I wish I didn't," Kagome said bitterly.
Her mother stood up and moved around the table to envelope Kagome in a hug. The miko felt comfortable for the first time since this ordeal started. Finally! Someone who understood and offered advice and support. As much as she loved her makeshift family in the past, sometimes a girl simply needed her mother.
"I know this is hard for you," her mom whispered, "but I raised you to be a strong girl. Keep in mind that, most likely, these events won't be remembered by anyone. It sounds cruel, but when you finally get it right, no one will remember the journey you took to get there. It will be painful for you, maybe, but not for them."
Kagome blinked. She had never thought of it that way before. No matter what she did on the day in question, as long as she was still in the loop she had a chance of fixing things. She would have to be careful, because she wasn't sure what was causing the loop, but she could do it. She could change the past so that none of the bad stuff happened!
She pulled away from the embrace and beamed at her mother. It was the first smile that she had felt from the heart in... well, she couldn't remember how long. "Thanks, Mama," she called out as she ran to get her backpack. "I knew I could count on you!"
She lugged her bag to the well and jumped in. The joy was back. She practically shrieked as if she was on a roller coaster ride when the well finally dumped her on the other side. Checking to make sure she was in the right past, she called out, "Is anybody there to help me out?"
Sango's head appeared and she called down the familiar response. Kagome's smile rivaled the sun, and held until she got out of the well. It was so contagious that Sango was grinning even as she asked what had happened that caused Kagome to be so happy.
"Nothing," Kagome sing-songed. At Sango's frank look of disbelief, she giggled and said, "Yes, it's something, but it's a se-cret!"
Try as she might, Sango could not get the laughing girl to admit the cause of her happiness. She guessed everything from a good grade on one of her tests to learning that she would not have to study for at least a week. Finally she started guessing wildly.
"Shippo has declared his undying love for you, and you now have another potential mate," she said, laughing.
"Nope," was the response.
"Miroku has?" Sango was pulling at straws.
"Not even close," Kagome said. She knew that she was behaving a little strangely, but all the freedom she had just discovered was going to her head.
"You've discovered that the hidden secret to defeating Naraku is his secret love for little pink bunnies!" Sango concluded.
It wasn't the suggestion that made Kagome stop. Now matter how close to the truth it was, Kagome did not break her good humor for that. They were now halfway to the village.
Her hilarity somewhat dimmed by Naraku's words, she continued towards the village. Sango followed, perplexed by Kagome's sudden mood shift. Finally she grabbed Kagome by the arm and forced her friend to face her.
"What's the matter with you today?" she demanded.
"Honestly, Sango-chan," she said, "I'm not sure you would believe me even if I told you. Suffice to say I've learned something that has made me incredibly happy."
"But what caused you to deflate so?" Sango asked, perplexed.
'Come on, Kagome,' she thought, 'You can come up with a lie she'll believe. You did it the first time around.' Hoping that her pause wasn't too noticeable, she said teasingly, "Well it can't be good for me to be too happy to come back here. We wouldn't want Inuyasha to have more reasons to keep me here."
Sango stifled a giggle. "You're right," she acknowledged.
"Speaking of the baka..." Kagome mused.
As if on cue, a screaming Shippo came barreling towards them, having seen them at the edge of the woods. An ouswari, many yells, a few explanations, and a couple of reluctant apologies later, Kagome was finally left on her own to think. She dropped her bag off in the hut and walked off to find a place to be by herself. She earned an extremely odd look from Miroku, who she passed on the way to the edge of the forest. She couldn't understand it for the longest time. It was only when she sat at the base of the tree, had to adjust her quiver and set aside her bow that she realized what Miroku was staring at.
She didn't even remember picking them up, or why she possibly thought she'd need them. Sure, she was going off to be by herself, but Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, heck, even Shippo and Kaede were within shouting distance. She knew what would happen today, so it wasn't like she was preparing for an unexpected attack. It just seemed natural to grab them, and she wondered when that had begun. She hadn't done it when she watched the stars last night, but she had had the whole day to become accustomed to the relative peace of this time. In this time, she knew, she had been more likely to forget her arrows then bring them unnecessarily. Even when they were traveling, her arrows often stayed by the campfire or in her room for the night. When had she grown so cautious that it was a necessity to bring them everywhere?
'Stop thinking about that,' she told herself. 'You can be scared about how paranoid you've gotten later. Right now you need to think about how to change the future'
Suddenly the task seemed daunting to her. What could she possibly change now that would affect a battle three months from now? Everything she had tried before had only messed it up more! She was only one girl, and a not very powerful one at that. If this had happened to any of the others, she was sure they would know exactly what to do. Whereas she...she was panicking. Taking long, deep breaths, she closed her eyes and forced herself to calm down and look at the situation logically.
So far, all she had been able to accomplish in the past was prevent someone from being at the battle, Sesshomaru, to be exact. The first time it saved his own hide; the second time killed him again. If she could prevent someone from being at the battle and thereby prevent her explosion, without affecting the outcome of the battle, who would it be?
She opened her eyes as a familiar rush of wind blew past. The whirlwind resolved itself into Kouga before her eyes. They stared at each other for a full minute before Kouga knelt and took her hands in a familiar gesture.
"I don't understand, Kagome," he said, "how that mutt expects to protect you if he leaves you out at the edge of the forest all by yourself."
"Oi, wimpy wolf," Inuyasha said, "I've been here almost the entire time, and for once she brought her weapons, so she shouldn't need protection from you."
Startled, Kagome glanced up into the tree she had been leaning against. Sure enough, Inuyasha was leaning against the trunk on one of the upper branches. She was so worried about whether he had witnessed her earlier panic attack that she totally missed the opening insults that led to the fight. All of a sudden she found herself staring at Kouga as he fought, thinking hard. Kouga had not contributed much to the final battle, other than to rescue her once. Her eyes widened. His rescue of her had been the first step, the first stage of her anger. If he wasn't there, she might not have exploded!
The problem was that she didn't know how to prevent him from being there. He was so persistent that whatever she did would have to be extreme. Could she hurt him like that? She wavered, but caught sight of Shippo standing on the side lines on the other side of the field. Yes, for all of their sakes, she would do practically anything.
She gripped her bow hard as she stood, waiting for her moment. She would have to keep careful control, and act totally against her own character, but she thought she could do it.
Finally the jump kick arrived. As she had done the previous day, she activated the subduing spell and stepped in between the combatants. This time was different only in the fact that she kept a hold of her bow as she flew across the field to land in the water. By the time she sat up. Sango and Miroku were by her side, and Shippo was running to get Kaede.
With Sango's support, she stood up and looked over to find Inuyasha confronting Kouga, preventing him from coming near. Her hands started to shake as she gripped her bow. Sensing that she was losing her nerve, she closed her eyes and conjured up a picture of the final battle. Shippo's scared squeals, Miroku's resigned step as he walked to his death, Inuyasha's desperate struggles, the shockingly peaceful expression on Sango's unconscious face, all flashed through her mind in an instant. The image that stayed with her, however, was of Kouga, broken and bleeding at her feet. She would do anything to save any one of them. Her eyes, when she opened them, caused Miroku to stumble backward from the intensity of her gaze.
Kouga had just finished calling out his apology when he caught the full heat of her glare. Without losing a second, Kagome drew her bow and fired. It was a lucky thing that Kouga was too shocked to move. As it was, the arrow barely grazed his legs, knocking the shards out of them. Obviously thinking that this was all some horrible misunderstanding, he moved to retrieve them. In an instant Kagome's bow was once again cocked and aimed directly at him.
"If you make any move, whatsoever," Kagome said coldly, "other than to get the hell away from here, I will shoot and pin you to a tree so fast that you won't be able to blink. And believe me, I won't be setting you free anytime soon."
He looked so shocked that she felt herself wavering once again. 'No,' she thought firmly. 'This is to save him. Think about how you felt when he first kidnapped you, imagine him as Naraku, do anything that might help, just see this through to the end.' Resolve newly firmed, she narrowed her eyes even further and called out, "Kouga, you're trying my patience. Leave. Now."
This time Kouga took the hint. Backing away slowly, he finally turned and ran. Kagome didn't relax her stance until he disappeared from the furthest reaches of her senses. When she was sure he had gone for good, she collapsed on the ground, arms wrapped around her ribs, which were aching from the abuse she had put them through.
"Yocatta," she whispered softly. "Thank you, Kouga"
She looked up only to find that everyone had backed away from her. Miroku had his staff held in a defensive position, and Inuyasha was clenching and unclenching his hands, looking like he wasn't sure whether he wanted to attack or not. Sango, Shippo, and even Kaede were looking at her in fear. She was puzzled, but then her mind seemed to catch up with her. "Of course," she muttered. "You must think I'm possessed."
She got up and retrieved Kouga's shards. Heading back to the hut, she sighed. Everyone was still frozen in position. "If you want an explanation," she called, "then come inside. I need to sit for a while."
Once inside, she wearily dug through her bag for the bottle with the shards. Dropping the two newest inside, she carefully braced herself against the wall. She really shouldn't have been able to hold the bow that long, and her ribs her paying for that now.
Slowly, everyone filed into the hut. There was a strained silence that no one seemed able to break. Finally Kaede saw the pain in Kagome's face and moved over to her medicines. "You were hurt, child," she said. "Let me tend to you."
Miroku caught on to the need for a break in the tension of the group. "Kagome-sama," he intoned, "allow me to assist you in the removal of you clothes so that Kaede-basan may see to your injuries!"
His efforts were successful, if a bit painful for him. Inuyasha's growl and Sango's slap broke the tension well enough.
Kagome managed a smile for him. "Thank you for the offer, Miroku-sama," she said, "but there is no need. My ribs are bruised, not broken, so there is nothing you can really do for them."
"How can you be sure, wench?" Inuyasha said. He was turned away from her, but his ears were trained on her, so she knew he was really concerned.
"I know," she answered, "because I've suffered this exact same injury at least twice before."
That statement only earned her more perplexed looks. She sighed. Time to start from the beginning...again.
"I'm from the future," she began. "Three months in the future, to be exact..."
* * *
It took a while, especially sinse Kagome was unwilling to tell more of the future than she absolutely had to, but they were finally convinced that she was from when she said she was. Well, almost all of them at least. Inuyasha flatly refused to believe, so she had told him about Sesshomaru. He was suspending his belief until then. He went off into the woods to sulk, and after extracting a promise to discourage Kouga, should he reappear, the others picked up their activities from the previous time Kagome had been there. Kaede and Miroku looked highly uncomfortable as they prepared the lesson. It appeared as if they didn't know where to start.
Kagome smiled. "If it helps," she said, "the last time you taught me we were about to start on barriers."
"Ahh," murmured Miroku wisely. He exchanged a glance with Kaede. "Perhaps if you would allow us some time to come up with a suitable lesson?"
Kagome nodded. "Let's have lunch," she said as her stomach grumbled. She reddened as she realized that she had once again forgotten breakfast.
Lunch was a pretty quiet affair. Miroku and Kaede whispered in the corner, coming up with a lesson. Shippo played with Sango, having been threatened with severe punishment if he jumped on Kagome. The miko was left alone with her pain. She shifted uncomfortably, not knowing why this time seemed worse than the previous times. She had woken up this morning with no pain, so her body hadn't retained the injuries from the precious time she had visited this day. Maybe it was a completely mental thing. She certainly had her memories of Kouga hitting her before, and her mind was telling her that that was only one day ago. Perhaps her mind was creating a phantom pain from the precious injury and compounding it with the current injury. Perhaps she was thinking too much.
"Kagome-chan?" Sango asked as Kagome winced and shifted once again. "Do you need any medicines for your pain?"
Kagome sighed. "Not with the advanced lesson, Sango-chan," she said in reply. "The medicine dulls my senses. The one time this I actually tried learning while on pain meds, I nearly singed Shippo-chan's tail."
Shippo squeaked and hid behind Sango, causing Miroku to chuckle. Once the laughter subsided, Miroku began the lesson.
"There are many different types of barriers, but they all fall into two distinct types. They are designed either to keep jyaki or youki out, or to keep it in. You can create a barrier out of the air, but, unless you are very powerful, it is generally more powerful if it has a physical manifestation: an ofuda put across the door, for example."
"Can barriers be used to keep miko power out?" Kagome asked idly.
"Well," Miroku seemed to consider. "Yes, I suppose if a youkai wished to keep a miko out-"
"That's not what I meant," she said more earnestly. "Can miko power be used to keep miko power out?"
Miroku took a long time in answering. "On a limited basis," he said finally. "If only one person were to anchor the spell, it would need something physical to bind to, and would only be able to protect a single person, or maybe two. A miko's power is not designed to protect against itself."
Kagome nodded and filed the information away for later use. Kaede picked up the thread of the interrupted lesson, and they were only interrupted when Sesshomaru showed up. Kagome refused to go outside, citing her bruised ribs and knowledge of the outcome as the reasons for her unconcern. Truthfully, she was not sure she could stand to sit idly by while Rin got kidnapped again. She had been able to do it once, but still managed to mess up the outcome. Even with her distance, however, she could still feel Naraku's youkai in the distance, and she itched to do something.
She managed to remain still long enough for the youkai to do their work. After that there was little she could do to help the situation. Sango, Miroku, and Shippo came back inside to find Kaede beginning dinner, and Kagome staring into space. It took Shippo several minutes to catch her attention, and then everyone was surprised at what she said.
"I'm sorry," she buried her face in her hands. "I'm such a horrible person."
Before anyone could protest such an outrageous statement, Inuyasha walked in. "That bastard, Sesshomaru," he was muttering. "What did he think he was doing, stopping the fight like that? Just because that little toad of his happened to wander into the clearing-"
"Shut up, Inuyasha," Kagome said, deadly calm. "You have no idea what you are talking about, so just shut up."
"So, what's gonna happen? I believe you now." Inuyasha asked.
"That poor little girl is going to be tortured for at least a month until I can get to her," Kagome responded, staring off into space again.
"Little girl?" Sango asked.
Kagome nodded absently. "Yeah. Rin, Sesshomaru's human ward."
Inuyasha's laughter seemed to startle her out of her mood, for she clammed up and refused to tell any more, no matter how much Inuyasha pestered her. It was amazing that, throughout dinner and the early evening, Inuyasha only earned himself two ouswari's. At least she felt better. With the lesson done, she took some aspirin to relieve the pressure on her side. Finally Inuyasha's questions earned him a response. Kagome huffed and left the hut. She marched angrily halfway up the hill where the shrine was, before carefully sitting down and leaning back to look at the emerging stars.
"Oi, Kagome!" Inuyasha's voice broke into the silence. Kagome watched warily as he sat beside her. He opened his mouth to speak again.
"Inuyasha, please, just drop it," Kagome said. "I don't know what will happen to the me you see tomorrow, whether she'll remember any of this or not, but I know I'll wake up to a very unpleasant world. So, for now, I'd like to just enjoy the peace of this world."
Inuyasha snorted at the idea that this world was peaceful, but allowed her choice. When Kikyo came, Kagome returned the favor by not interrupting. It hadn't harmed the future before, so she could allow Kikyo her moment with Inuyasha. Perhaps it was because of her earlier behavior, but Inuyasha did not stay with Kikyo long. In about half the time it had taken the first night, Inuyasha was back, and they walked back to the hut together.
Kagome eyed her sleeping bag wearily. That first night she hadn't been able to sleep alone in it. Inuyasha caught onto her hesitation.
"What's the matter?" He whispered, careful not to wake the others.
"C-can I sleep with you?" Kagome blurted out fast after an initial hesitation. Realizing the way that sounded, she quickly tried to back out of it. "Only to sleep, that is. I-in the future, I sleep better with you, and I guess it's just a habit that's hard to break. You don't even have to stay with me the entire night. I mean, once I fall asleep you can put me back into the sleeping bag and-"
"Shut up, girl," Inuyasha said roughly.
He tugged her down and pillowed her against his chest. "I'm only doing this to shut you up, you know."
"I know," Kagome agreed softly as she drifted off to sleep.
* * *
Kagome stared at the journal in shock. That's not what she wanted at all! At this point she was convinced that the gods hated her. She read it again just to be sure.
"I never saw the youkai coming. Inuyasha did, though. He saved me, getting severely injured in the process. He was so injured that when my powers stole the youkai from him, I unintentionally killed him. No human could survive the injuries he sustained."
Kagome threw the little book across the room. All her meddling and this is what happened. It would be better if that stupid battle had never taken place.
She froze. If the battle had never taken place? She had been trying to fix the battle, but what if she could prevent it from happening? Was it even possible? Her scattered thoughts coalesced into a single, horrible thought.
Kikyo.
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A/N: dun dun DUN! And there you have it folks, her first active attempt to change the past. Don't worry, she'll succeed one of these days. On a side note, Miroku is so fun to write!!! I really enjoyed him for the short time he appeared in this chapter. He is just so outrageous that it makes it so easy to imagine stuff for him to do. I don't have the restrictions that are placed on other characters! Hee hee hee. I will stop rejoicing now.
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Review Responses:
Aamalie: You were just in the right place at exactly the right time! I posted and not an hour later I get a review! *HUGGLES! Sends candy* Write more of those wonderful poems soon, onegai!!
Alden Hawke: I am glad you signed in. It makes it easier to find you and leave a review as well! (I haven't had time to do that this week, stupid college) I will get to it soon! Unfortunately, once a week is about all I can manage (see above, college) so this is as fast as you get. But at least it's not six months!! (See Fushigi Yuugi fic, Paint the Sky with Stars *Sweatdrop*)
Dark Hanyou: Glad you liked it! Anything in particular? Or maybe something I can improve on? Something you want to see? (I make no guarantees on the last one, but I already took somebody else's suggestion, so...)
Moonsilver: I'm glad that at least one of my readers isn't confused anymore! That part at the beginning is about all the down time Kagome's gonna get, at least until SPOILER happens, but then its gonna be SPOILER. Makes sense, ne?
Noname: Like the handle! So you're one of those weird people who think weird is good. Cool! Me too! Most of my fics are just twists on a typical plotline that I see happening in fandoms, so they end up being a little weird.
Aditu: Ahhh, my one fan on Mediaminer! (at least the only one who reviews, I seem to get a lot of hits...grrr) I am glad you didn't think Kikyo is out of character. A little later on, I may have to take a serious break because the entire chapter will be Kikyo's POV. ACK! *Blushes at all the compliments* Thanks again! I hope this chapter gave you something to chew on. My advice would be to pay attention to all the little bits of info you are receiving, because it's all gonna come together in a chapter or two.
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Couldn't think of a parody this time either, so...
WS
Warnings: A little bit of Kagome OOC-ness
A/N: silly me, I got the name of Kagome's friend wrong. Ayame is a MALE character from Fruits Basket, where as Ayumi is Kagome's friend. Is changed in previous chapters
Translations: I'll put these here, because there are some words that you need to know before the end of the chapter. (some of these definitions I am not certain of, but when I say it, this is what I mean.)
Baka-usually translated as idiot, but can mean stupid or foolish as well. NOT much of an insult at all
Yocatta-"I'm glad" or "Thank goodness" small prayer to a god in thanks.
Youki- a youkai's "signature" how a spiritualist can tell one youkai from another. (It's what Miroku "senses" in people's houses when he wants someplace to stay for the night)
Jyaki- the youkai equivalent to a monk's or miko's powers, generally VERY nasty. Also can indicate the presence of a ghost
Ofuda- the little pieces of paper that monks and mikos use to fight spirits and/or seal things
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For Such a Time as This
Chapter 4: The Winds of Fate
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'Even if, being as careful as I was' Kagome thought, dazed. 'I still managed to change the past, how am I ever going to fix things?' She sat there, pondering, wondering about her options. Finally she gave up and went to seek out a higher authority, one that had never failed her in giving good advice, and one whose judgment she trusted completely.
"Mama?" Kagome called, poking her head into the kitchen. "Can I talk to you for a bit?"
"Sure," her mother replied, drying off her hands.
"I'm going to explain something to you," Kagome began, "and it may sound a little crazy, but I want you to hear me out."
"Crazier then the fact that I have a daughter who happened to go through the family well into the past to fight youkai?" Eyes twinkling, her mother prepared some tea for the both of them.
Her daughter only answered with a cynical laugh. At her raised eyebrow, Kagome said, "It can get much crazier, Mama."
"Kagome, what's wrong?" the woman replied. "You seem different than yesterday."
"I've lived at least two days since then, Mama," Kagome responded. She pushed ruthlessly on. "Each day I would wake up at my desk with a startlingly vivid dream of the previous day. And each day I would jump through the well to end up in the past. But it wouldn't be my past, or at least not the past I was expecting. What happens now when I jump through the well is that I end up further back in the past then I should. I always go back to the same day, but when I wake up I'm back here."
"Ok," her mom thought for a second. "So you keep reliving the same day in the past, and you come back here, even if you don't go through the well?"
"Yes," Kagome nodded, happy to be understood. "I need some advice on what to do. I unintentionally changed the past the first time, but when I tried to fix things, it only ended up being worse."
"Is there anything particularly special about the day you go back to?" her mother mused.
"Other than everyone and their grandmother's second cousin showing up to fight Inuyasha, not really. There weren't any major battles, and we didn't find out any crucial information. It was just a day," Kagome huffed, frustrated.
"But it sounds like a very eventful day," her mother said. "Maybe you are supposed to change something about that day. If there were a lot of people there that day, you have a lot of elements to work with. It sounds like you have time to find the right combination of elements to break the loop."
"Okay," Kagome said dubiously.
"How do you know that you have changed the past?" Her mother asked after a moment of silence.
"All of... yesterday, I guess, I wrote in a journal that Ayumi gave me. The contents of the journal change when I change the past. I don't exactly know what happens to those who are not in the journal, but I know who has died. I wish I didn't," Kagome said bitterly.
Her mother stood up and moved around the table to envelope Kagome in a hug. The miko felt comfortable for the first time since this ordeal started. Finally! Someone who understood and offered advice and support. As much as she loved her makeshift family in the past, sometimes a girl simply needed her mother.
"I know this is hard for you," her mom whispered, "but I raised you to be a strong girl. Keep in mind that, most likely, these events won't be remembered by anyone. It sounds cruel, but when you finally get it right, no one will remember the journey you took to get there. It will be painful for you, maybe, but not for them."
Kagome blinked. She had never thought of it that way before. No matter what she did on the day in question, as long as she was still in the loop she had a chance of fixing things. She would have to be careful, because she wasn't sure what was causing the loop, but she could do it. She could change the past so that none of the bad stuff happened!
She pulled away from the embrace and beamed at her mother. It was the first smile that she had felt from the heart in... well, she couldn't remember how long. "Thanks, Mama," she called out as she ran to get her backpack. "I knew I could count on you!"
She lugged her bag to the well and jumped in. The joy was back. She practically shrieked as if she was on a roller coaster ride when the well finally dumped her on the other side. Checking to make sure she was in the right past, she called out, "Is anybody there to help me out?"
Sango's head appeared and she called down the familiar response. Kagome's smile rivaled the sun, and held until she got out of the well. It was so contagious that Sango was grinning even as she asked what had happened that caused Kagome to be so happy.
"Nothing," Kagome sing-songed. At Sango's frank look of disbelief, she giggled and said, "Yes, it's something, but it's a se-cret!"
Try as she might, Sango could not get the laughing girl to admit the cause of her happiness. She guessed everything from a good grade on one of her tests to learning that she would not have to study for at least a week. Finally she started guessing wildly.
"Shippo has declared his undying love for you, and you now have another potential mate," she said, laughing.
"Nope," was the response.
"Miroku has?" Sango was pulling at straws.
"Not even close," Kagome said. She knew that she was behaving a little strangely, but all the freedom she had just discovered was going to her head.
"You've discovered that the hidden secret to defeating Naraku is his secret love for little pink bunnies!" Sango concluded.
It wasn't the suggestion that made Kagome stop. Now matter how close to the truth it was, Kagome did not break her good humor for that. They were now halfway to the village.
Her hilarity somewhat dimmed by Naraku's words, she continued towards the village. Sango followed, perplexed by Kagome's sudden mood shift. Finally she grabbed Kagome by the arm and forced her friend to face her.
"What's the matter with you today?" she demanded.
"Honestly, Sango-chan," she said, "I'm not sure you would believe me even if I told you. Suffice to say I've learned something that has made me incredibly happy."
"But what caused you to deflate so?" Sango asked, perplexed.
'Come on, Kagome,' she thought, 'You can come up with a lie she'll believe. You did it the first time around.' Hoping that her pause wasn't too noticeable, she said teasingly, "Well it can't be good for me to be too happy to come back here. We wouldn't want Inuyasha to have more reasons to keep me here."
Sango stifled a giggle. "You're right," she acknowledged.
"Speaking of the baka..." Kagome mused.
As if on cue, a screaming Shippo came barreling towards them, having seen them at the edge of the woods. An ouswari, many yells, a few explanations, and a couple of reluctant apologies later, Kagome was finally left on her own to think. She dropped her bag off in the hut and walked off to find a place to be by herself. She earned an extremely odd look from Miroku, who she passed on the way to the edge of the forest. She couldn't understand it for the longest time. It was only when she sat at the base of the tree, had to adjust her quiver and set aside her bow that she realized what Miroku was staring at.
She didn't even remember picking them up, or why she possibly thought she'd need them. Sure, she was going off to be by herself, but Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, heck, even Shippo and Kaede were within shouting distance. She knew what would happen today, so it wasn't like she was preparing for an unexpected attack. It just seemed natural to grab them, and she wondered when that had begun. She hadn't done it when she watched the stars last night, but she had had the whole day to become accustomed to the relative peace of this time. In this time, she knew, she had been more likely to forget her arrows then bring them unnecessarily. Even when they were traveling, her arrows often stayed by the campfire or in her room for the night. When had she grown so cautious that it was a necessity to bring them everywhere?
'Stop thinking about that,' she told herself. 'You can be scared about how paranoid you've gotten later. Right now you need to think about how to change the future'
Suddenly the task seemed daunting to her. What could she possibly change now that would affect a battle three months from now? Everything she had tried before had only messed it up more! She was only one girl, and a not very powerful one at that. If this had happened to any of the others, she was sure they would know exactly what to do. Whereas she...she was panicking. Taking long, deep breaths, she closed her eyes and forced herself to calm down and look at the situation logically.
So far, all she had been able to accomplish in the past was prevent someone from being at the battle, Sesshomaru, to be exact. The first time it saved his own hide; the second time killed him again. If she could prevent someone from being at the battle and thereby prevent her explosion, without affecting the outcome of the battle, who would it be?
She opened her eyes as a familiar rush of wind blew past. The whirlwind resolved itself into Kouga before her eyes. They stared at each other for a full minute before Kouga knelt and took her hands in a familiar gesture.
"I don't understand, Kagome," he said, "how that mutt expects to protect you if he leaves you out at the edge of the forest all by yourself."
"Oi, wimpy wolf," Inuyasha said, "I've been here almost the entire time, and for once she brought her weapons, so she shouldn't need protection from you."
Startled, Kagome glanced up into the tree she had been leaning against. Sure enough, Inuyasha was leaning against the trunk on one of the upper branches. She was so worried about whether he had witnessed her earlier panic attack that she totally missed the opening insults that led to the fight. All of a sudden she found herself staring at Kouga as he fought, thinking hard. Kouga had not contributed much to the final battle, other than to rescue her once. Her eyes widened. His rescue of her had been the first step, the first stage of her anger. If he wasn't there, she might not have exploded!
The problem was that she didn't know how to prevent him from being there. He was so persistent that whatever she did would have to be extreme. Could she hurt him like that? She wavered, but caught sight of Shippo standing on the side lines on the other side of the field. Yes, for all of their sakes, she would do practically anything.
She gripped her bow hard as she stood, waiting for her moment. She would have to keep careful control, and act totally against her own character, but she thought she could do it.
Finally the jump kick arrived. As she had done the previous day, she activated the subduing spell and stepped in between the combatants. This time was different only in the fact that she kept a hold of her bow as she flew across the field to land in the water. By the time she sat up. Sango and Miroku were by her side, and Shippo was running to get Kaede.
With Sango's support, she stood up and looked over to find Inuyasha confronting Kouga, preventing him from coming near. Her hands started to shake as she gripped her bow. Sensing that she was losing her nerve, she closed her eyes and conjured up a picture of the final battle. Shippo's scared squeals, Miroku's resigned step as he walked to his death, Inuyasha's desperate struggles, the shockingly peaceful expression on Sango's unconscious face, all flashed through her mind in an instant. The image that stayed with her, however, was of Kouga, broken and bleeding at her feet. She would do anything to save any one of them. Her eyes, when she opened them, caused Miroku to stumble backward from the intensity of her gaze.
Kouga had just finished calling out his apology when he caught the full heat of her glare. Without losing a second, Kagome drew her bow and fired. It was a lucky thing that Kouga was too shocked to move. As it was, the arrow barely grazed his legs, knocking the shards out of them. Obviously thinking that this was all some horrible misunderstanding, he moved to retrieve them. In an instant Kagome's bow was once again cocked and aimed directly at him.
"If you make any move, whatsoever," Kagome said coldly, "other than to get the hell away from here, I will shoot and pin you to a tree so fast that you won't be able to blink. And believe me, I won't be setting you free anytime soon."
He looked so shocked that she felt herself wavering once again. 'No,' she thought firmly. 'This is to save him. Think about how you felt when he first kidnapped you, imagine him as Naraku, do anything that might help, just see this through to the end.' Resolve newly firmed, she narrowed her eyes even further and called out, "Kouga, you're trying my patience. Leave. Now."
This time Kouga took the hint. Backing away slowly, he finally turned and ran. Kagome didn't relax her stance until he disappeared from the furthest reaches of her senses. When she was sure he had gone for good, she collapsed on the ground, arms wrapped around her ribs, which were aching from the abuse she had put them through.
"Yocatta," she whispered softly. "Thank you, Kouga"
She looked up only to find that everyone had backed away from her. Miroku had his staff held in a defensive position, and Inuyasha was clenching and unclenching his hands, looking like he wasn't sure whether he wanted to attack or not. Sango, Shippo, and even Kaede were looking at her in fear. She was puzzled, but then her mind seemed to catch up with her. "Of course," she muttered. "You must think I'm possessed."
She got up and retrieved Kouga's shards. Heading back to the hut, she sighed. Everyone was still frozen in position. "If you want an explanation," she called, "then come inside. I need to sit for a while."
Once inside, she wearily dug through her bag for the bottle with the shards. Dropping the two newest inside, she carefully braced herself against the wall. She really shouldn't have been able to hold the bow that long, and her ribs her paying for that now.
Slowly, everyone filed into the hut. There was a strained silence that no one seemed able to break. Finally Kaede saw the pain in Kagome's face and moved over to her medicines. "You were hurt, child," she said. "Let me tend to you."
Miroku caught on to the need for a break in the tension of the group. "Kagome-sama," he intoned, "allow me to assist you in the removal of you clothes so that Kaede-basan may see to your injuries!"
His efforts were successful, if a bit painful for him. Inuyasha's growl and Sango's slap broke the tension well enough.
Kagome managed a smile for him. "Thank you for the offer, Miroku-sama," she said, "but there is no need. My ribs are bruised, not broken, so there is nothing you can really do for them."
"How can you be sure, wench?" Inuyasha said. He was turned away from her, but his ears were trained on her, so she knew he was really concerned.
"I know," she answered, "because I've suffered this exact same injury at least twice before."
That statement only earned her more perplexed looks. She sighed. Time to start from the beginning...again.
"I'm from the future," she began. "Three months in the future, to be exact..."
* * *
It took a while, especially sinse Kagome was unwilling to tell more of the future than she absolutely had to, but they were finally convinced that she was from when she said she was. Well, almost all of them at least. Inuyasha flatly refused to believe, so she had told him about Sesshomaru. He was suspending his belief until then. He went off into the woods to sulk, and after extracting a promise to discourage Kouga, should he reappear, the others picked up their activities from the previous time Kagome had been there. Kaede and Miroku looked highly uncomfortable as they prepared the lesson. It appeared as if they didn't know where to start.
Kagome smiled. "If it helps," she said, "the last time you taught me we were about to start on barriers."
"Ahh," murmured Miroku wisely. He exchanged a glance with Kaede. "Perhaps if you would allow us some time to come up with a suitable lesson?"
Kagome nodded. "Let's have lunch," she said as her stomach grumbled. She reddened as she realized that she had once again forgotten breakfast.
Lunch was a pretty quiet affair. Miroku and Kaede whispered in the corner, coming up with a lesson. Shippo played with Sango, having been threatened with severe punishment if he jumped on Kagome. The miko was left alone with her pain. She shifted uncomfortably, not knowing why this time seemed worse than the previous times. She had woken up this morning with no pain, so her body hadn't retained the injuries from the precious time she had visited this day. Maybe it was a completely mental thing. She certainly had her memories of Kouga hitting her before, and her mind was telling her that that was only one day ago. Perhaps her mind was creating a phantom pain from the precious injury and compounding it with the current injury. Perhaps she was thinking too much.
"Kagome-chan?" Sango asked as Kagome winced and shifted once again. "Do you need any medicines for your pain?"
Kagome sighed. "Not with the advanced lesson, Sango-chan," she said in reply. "The medicine dulls my senses. The one time this I actually tried learning while on pain meds, I nearly singed Shippo-chan's tail."
Shippo squeaked and hid behind Sango, causing Miroku to chuckle. Once the laughter subsided, Miroku began the lesson.
"There are many different types of barriers, but they all fall into two distinct types. They are designed either to keep jyaki or youki out, or to keep it in. You can create a barrier out of the air, but, unless you are very powerful, it is generally more powerful if it has a physical manifestation: an ofuda put across the door, for example."
"Can barriers be used to keep miko power out?" Kagome asked idly.
"Well," Miroku seemed to consider. "Yes, I suppose if a youkai wished to keep a miko out-"
"That's not what I meant," she said more earnestly. "Can miko power be used to keep miko power out?"
Miroku took a long time in answering. "On a limited basis," he said finally. "If only one person were to anchor the spell, it would need something physical to bind to, and would only be able to protect a single person, or maybe two. A miko's power is not designed to protect against itself."
Kagome nodded and filed the information away for later use. Kaede picked up the thread of the interrupted lesson, and they were only interrupted when Sesshomaru showed up. Kagome refused to go outside, citing her bruised ribs and knowledge of the outcome as the reasons for her unconcern. Truthfully, she was not sure she could stand to sit idly by while Rin got kidnapped again. She had been able to do it once, but still managed to mess up the outcome. Even with her distance, however, she could still feel Naraku's youkai in the distance, and she itched to do something.
She managed to remain still long enough for the youkai to do their work. After that there was little she could do to help the situation. Sango, Miroku, and Shippo came back inside to find Kaede beginning dinner, and Kagome staring into space. It took Shippo several minutes to catch her attention, and then everyone was surprised at what she said.
"I'm sorry," she buried her face in her hands. "I'm such a horrible person."
Before anyone could protest such an outrageous statement, Inuyasha walked in. "That bastard, Sesshomaru," he was muttering. "What did he think he was doing, stopping the fight like that? Just because that little toad of his happened to wander into the clearing-"
"Shut up, Inuyasha," Kagome said, deadly calm. "You have no idea what you are talking about, so just shut up."
"So, what's gonna happen? I believe you now." Inuyasha asked.
"That poor little girl is going to be tortured for at least a month until I can get to her," Kagome responded, staring off into space again.
"Little girl?" Sango asked.
Kagome nodded absently. "Yeah. Rin, Sesshomaru's human ward."
Inuyasha's laughter seemed to startle her out of her mood, for she clammed up and refused to tell any more, no matter how much Inuyasha pestered her. It was amazing that, throughout dinner and the early evening, Inuyasha only earned himself two ouswari's. At least she felt better. With the lesson done, she took some aspirin to relieve the pressure on her side. Finally Inuyasha's questions earned him a response. Kagome huffed and left the hut. She marched angrily halfway up the hill where the shrine was, before carefully sitting down and leaning back to look at the emerging stars.
"Oi, Kagome!" Inuyasha's voice broke into the silence. Kagome watched warily as he sat beside her. He opened his mouth to speak again.
"Inuyasha, please, just drop it," Kagome said. "I don't know what will happen to the me you see tomorrow, whether she'll remember any of this or not, but I know I'll wake up to a very unpleasant world. So, for now, I'd like to just enjoy the peace of this world."
Inuyasha snorted at the idea that this world was peaceful, but allowed her choice. When Kikyo came, Kagome returned the favor by not interrupting. It hadn't harmed the future before, so she could allow Kikyo her moment with Inuyasha. Perhaps it was because of her earlier behavior, but Inuyasha did not stay with Kikyo long. In about half the time it had taken the first night, Inuyasha was back, and they walked back to the hut together.
Kagome eyed her sleeping bag wearily. That first night she hadn't been able to sleep alone in it. Inuyasha caught onto her hesitation.
"What's the matter?" He whispered, careful not to wake the others.
"C-can I sleep with you?" Kagome blurted out fast after an initial hesitation. Realizing the way that sounded, she quickly tried to back out of it. "Only to sleep, that is. I-in the future, I sleep better with you, and I guess it's just a habit that's hard to break. You don't even have to stay with me the entire night. I mean, once I fall asleep you can put me back into the sleeping bag and-"
"Shut up, girl," Inuyasha said roughly.
He tugged her down and pillowed her against his chest. "I'm only doing this to shut you up, you know."
"I know," Kagome agreed softly as she drifted off to sleep.
* * *
Kagome stared at the journal in shock. That's not what she wanted at all! At this point she was convinced that the gods hated her. She read it again just to be sure.
"I never saw the youkai coming. Inuyasha did, though. He saved me, getting severely injured in the process. He was so injured that when my powers stole the youkai from him, I unintentionally killed him. No human could survive the injuries he sustained."
Kagome threw the little book across the room. All her meddling and this is what happened. It would be better if that stupid battle had never taken place.
She froze. If the battle had never taken place? She had been trying to fix the battle, but what if she could prevent it from happening? Was it even possible? Her scattered thoughts coalesced into a single, horrible thought.
Kikyo.
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A/N: dun dun DUN! And there you have it folks, her first active attempt to change the past. Don't worry, she'll succeed one of these days. On a side note, Miroku is so fun to write!!! I really enjoyed him for the short time he appeared in this chapter. He is just so outrageous that it makes it so easy to imagine stuff for him to do. I don't have the restrictions that are placed on other characters! Hee hee hee. I will stop rejoicing now.
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Review Responses:
Aamalie: You were just in the right place at exactly the right time! I posted and not an hour later I get a review! *HUGGLES! Sends candy* Write more of those wonderful poems soon, onegai!!
Alden Hawke: I am glad you signed in. It makes it easier to find you and leave a review as well! (I haven't had time to do that this week, stupid college) I will get to it soon! Unfortunately, once a week is about all I can manage (see above, college) so this is as fast as you get. But at least it's not six months!! (See Fushigi Yuugi fic, Paint the Sky with Stars *Sweatdrop*)
Dark Hanyou: Glad you liked it! Anything in particular? Or maybe something I can improve on? Something you want to see? (I make no guarantees on the last one, but I already took somebody else's suggestion, so...)
Moonsilver: I'm glad that at least one of my readers isn't confused anymore! That part at the beginning is about all the down time Kagome's gonna get, at least until SPOILER happens, but then its gonna be SPOILER. Makes sense, ne?
Noname: Like the handle! So you're one of those weird people who think weird is good. Cool! Me too! Most of my fics are just twists on a typical plotline that I see happening in fandoms, so they end up being a little weird.
Aditu: Ahhh, my one fan on Mediaminer! (at least the only one who reviews, I seem to get a lot of hits...grrr) I am glad you didn't think Kikyo is out of character. A little later on, I may have to take a serious break because the entire chapter will be Kikyo's POV. ACK! *Blushes at all the compliments* Thanks again! I hope this chapter gave you something to chew on. My advice would be to pay attention to all the little bits of info you are receiving, because it's all gonna come together in a chapter or two.
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Couldn't think of a parody this time either, so...
WS