InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Forever Pain ❯ Chapter 33~The Morning After! ( Chapter 34 )

Forever Pain

 

 

By Mija

 

 

Disclaimer~dont own any of em, not even Kyoto, who belongs soley to my friend Kyoto. I soo know its been ages since this has been updated but Im soo trying to update most of them, dont know how good it will be since I have no muse what so ever but reading back chaps has helped with some ideas that I hope wont dissapoint.

 

 

Chapter 33~The Morning After!

 

 

 

 

~~~Ohh Kagomes body ached bad. Even in sleep she felt her muscles cramped and sore. Vagely she wondered why she was so sore, till her mind registered the hot sweaty body spooning her from behind. Then all of it came back to her. Inuyasha. Her. Sweaty. Moaning. Groaning. Teasing and tasting. Cumming. Damn she could still feel him inside of her, although he was not, it was like her body had imprinted his organ into her womb and she still felt it within her, a ghostly remembrance of a hot steamy night they had both enjoyed immensly. But now? Now was diffrent. She looked over to the clock and saw the time. 5:30 am. She started work soon and still had to go home and shower and change. She looked over to Inuyasha and smiled, but it was sort of a sad smile.

 

 

~~~No. She did not regret what she and him had done. She had wanted him badly, and he had wanted her. She had known it was not a permanant thing and felt she would be alright. But she should of known better really. In her heart of hearts, she had secretly wanted more than just sex or a one night thing or what ever he was willing to give her before he tired of her. She had thought she could handle it. She had believed it last night. But looking at it in the cold light of day she realized one thing. One night would never be enough. She wanted Inu with a love and passion she had never felt. For her he was the most honest man she could ever remember meeting. Yes he was foul mouthed and had a temper, but he was honest about it, he didnt hide who he was or how he talked or acted. That alone told her that what she saw wwas what she got and she felt it in her heart that no matter how bad tempered he might be, he would never hurt her emotionally or physicaly like so many others. But he would hurt her. She knew this with out a doubt.

 

~~~She wanted more. She wanted his love. She wanted his undevided attention. This was the reason she had not wanted to get involved with Inu in the first place, when she found herself liking him. He was a jet set playboy, he tired of girls easily and never settled down. She had thought she could push that all aside and just think of her needs, her most primal desires. She had lusted after him and convinced herself that if she went into this with eyes wide open then it would phase her. But she was wrong. Oh so wrong. She had felt so complete and so whole for the first time in her life last night as they made love, or more basicly, had mind blowing sex. Every fiber in her being had wanted to be one with him, to never be parted from him, and that had been the biggest mistake in her life. She had known going into this that it was not to be, she knew dammit, but as she gazed as his sleepy form her heart clentched. Oh God. She wanted so much more from him, but she knew she would never have it. And it was all her fault. The best thing she could do now was sneak out of his penthouse and go home, act like it hadnt happened, harden her heart and prepare for the day she would see Inu with another woman in his arms.

 

 

~~~She would not bind him to her out of pity. She felt that it was one of the things he felt about her, which she did not like. Yes she had been through alot, but so had other and she did not deserve pity. She was strong. She could go on and live without this man in her life, even if it would hurt to see him daily and know that he was not hers. She'd dont this before. She'd bottled up all those longing and desires, all those wishes and hopes. She had stopped dreaming of the perfect man for her, because even if someone decent came into her life, she still felt that she did not deserve to have someone like that in her life. She was destined to be alone, or with men who treated her like garbage. In her opinion, she would rather be alone.

 

~~~Slowly and carefully she crept out of his embrace and left the bed, carefull not to disturb the handsome man laying naked in his huge bed, a bed they had shared for one incrediable night. She felt like crying as she put on her clothes and crept out of his apartment without waking him. He was all she wanted and he was far beyond her reach, unless she was willing to be his new sex toy for awhile. Last night she was sure that she would of surficed. But now? Now she was confussed. Somewhere along the line she had fallen in love with Inuyasha. A man way out of her league. She couldnt bare to go on having casual sex with him without love, and if she did, her heart would be torn to pieces bit by bit till she was that same weakling that Hojo had zoned in on. A person that would do anything and indure anything just to be wanted, held and hopefully loved. Knowing it wouldnt happen with Inuyasha she was cutting her losses not before she got to the point that she wouldnt be able to live without him. Although it hurt now, it was far less than it would be if she continued on this distructive path. With that she left the building, haled a cab and went home. Dreading the moment she saw Inu as work that day. She would have to be strong. She had to for her own sake and sanity.

 

 

 

 

A/N~Okies heres the next chap, yes sooooo long in coming and really short but its something and as I said I am trying to do this without my muse so I hope it holds up to the rest of the fic and that you all enjoy it. Thank you to all who have been patient and faithfull to this fic, much huggles and smiles Mija...:-)