InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ His Little Girl ❯ Waking Up ( Chapter 37 )

 

 

Kagome fell asleep in his arms that night, tears still seeping slowly from beneath her closed lids. Sesshoumaru gently eased her back to lie on the pillows and rose from the bed. Gathering a sleeping gown for her, he slipped off the loose kimono and dressed her in the silken gown. He sent for dinner to be served in his room tonight as he was loathe to leave her side. He didn't understand what was wrong, he knew that his brother knew something, but also was not willing to tell him. At least not yet.

 

That night he lay awake beside her in their bed as he held her in his arms. He wished that just by holding her, he could somehow chase her inner demons away. That he could make her happy again. He so longed to see her awaken and smile up at him as she often would, to greet him with a kiss and then a shy smile as she would blush when she pulled away. She was passionate and loving and so beautiful, and yet she was still shy about it all. She loved to sit on the edge of his desk when he was working and tempt him by letting her kimono fall open on her knees. She would smile and duck her face when he noticed, slip off her perch and come to stand behind his chair. She would wrap her arms around him, criss crossing them over his chest and hug him from behind as she kissed his neck. That was his Kagome, not this sad lost creature.

 

He wrapped her tighter in his arms and placed a hand upon her abdomen. He smiled softly and stroked the silk covered skin. He couldn't wait to see her bloom with his pups within, to see her full of life and glowing with that motherly glow that woman held when they were with child. He could almost see the round fullness of her belly now if he thought about it enough. Kissing her temple, he buried his face in her hair and breathed in her scent. Even in her sleep she smelled of despair. What had happened while she had been away? What had caused this change in her?

 

Near sunrise his eyes drifted shut and he fell into a light slumber, his concern for his mate not allowing him a deep sleep. Shortly after he fell asleep, Kagome woke up. She blinked sleep and dried tears from her dull eyes and looked down to see herself dressed in silk and wrapped in a warm embrace. How could he stand to touch her she wondered. She carefully slipped out of his embrace, not noticing that in doing so she had woken him.

 

Sesshoumaru lay there acting as though he were still asleep as he watched her through hooded eyes. He watched in silence as she removed the silken gown and carefully hung it back up in the wardrobe before donning a cotton bathing robe and gathering her soaps and shampoos. She left the room only to return nearly half an hour later, Sesshoumaru still pretending to be asleep so that he could watch her unguarded.

 

He watched as she removed the robe and saw that she had rubbed her skin raw while she had bathed, even scratched at her own flesh, he could see the trail of nail marks on her arms and legs. He watched still as she took a plain woody brown cotton kimono from her wardrobe, he began to think that the only reason she didn't wear one made of wool was because there were none in there. She tied an obi of the same color around her waist. He noticed though that as she stood there, she looked longingly upon the silk and patterned kimonos, as though she wanted to wear them but for whatever reason thought she couldn't.

 

She sat on the end of the bed facing away from it and began to pull her brush through her hair. Silently, Sesshoumaru moved to sit behind her, his legs on either side of hers. He gently took the brush from her hand and began to brush her hair in smooth easy strokes until the ebony locks were dry and shined like freshly polished wood. He set the brush aside and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, saddened when she didn't return the embrace as she normally would by wrapping her arms over his. Instead she sat silently without making a move. He rested his head on her shoulder and pulled her back so that their bodies were in full contact.

 

Kissing her temple he asked, “What's wrong koishii? Why are you so sad?” He closed his eyes sadly and clenched his jaw to fight back helpless emotions when she remained silent. “Why won't you talk to me? Just tell me what's wrong koi, please.”

 

Tears pricked her eyes as she heard the pleading in his voice. On top of all the dishonor she'd already brought upon him, she was now causing him pain as well it seemed. Couldn't she do anything right? She pulled out of his arms, her hands shaking. Her eyes were fixed to the floor as she stood and moved to the door. She stopped and turned her eyes still downcast, when he caught her wrist in his hand.

 

“Please Kagome…tell me what's wrong,” he begged once more.

 

Tears slipped down her cheeks and his grip loosened. “I'm sorry,” she whispered. “I just can't,” her whispered words causing her pain as she pulled free of him once more and ran out of the room.

 

“Kagome!” he yelled after her as he stood with his arm outstretched. He sighed and let his hand drop.

 

Sesshoumaru sat back down on the bed behind him and propped his elbows on his knees as he put his face in his hands. What was wrong?! Unnoticed by the taiyoukai, his brother entered the room and sat down by his side.

 

“So she told you huh?” Inuyasha asked. He had seen Kagome go running down the hall and into the garden, hardly believing that the woman clad in the drab brown kimono was her. “She was afraid to tell you. I guess it didn't go over too well huh?” the hanyou asked when his brother remained quiet. “Just go easy on her ok, she didn't know.”

 

Know what? Sesshoumaru thought as his brother left him to his thoughts. Obviously, very obviously, his brother knew what was going on. His thoughts were interrupted when Miroku came running in to tell him that Maika had finally awoken. He smiled softly and followed the once again human monk to his pack sister's room.

 

Maika was sitting up in bed holding tightly to Kashu who had caught the distraught woman when she woke upon a scream as she exited a nightmare. Kashu was holding her and petting her hair trying to calm the girl and tell her that she was safe now and that nothing could hurt her anymore. Inuyasha entered behind his brother and moved to his mate's side, taking her from the shared mother he and apparently everyone else had found in Kagome's mother. He took his mate into his arms, and held her on his lap and in his rams as he rocked her back and forth declaring his never ending love and that he would always keep her safe.

 

Maika eventually calmed down and was able to tell them of what had happened to her. So afraid of their rejection was she that her father's name came out a mere whisper. Sesshoumaru's head popped up at the name and he growled fiercely, he remembered the massacre quite clearly, having to settle down the inuyoukai village after it had happened. He had no idea that Maika was the living daughter, what the others didn't know, was that in the following five years after Maika's mother and sister had been killed, her father had killed all of his mates and offspring.

 

“He's dead Sesshoumaru-sama,” Tiyeko said softly as he stood next to his lord and friend. “Shinta and I killed him and the others with him.”

 

Sesshoumaru nodded and moved to stand before his brother and his mate. Kneeling down so that he was looking up into her blue violet eyes, he took her face into his hands and said softly but firmly, “You are a part of this family Maika, someone that I am proud to call sister, friend, and one that I am proud to have in my ranks. You need never fear you will loose your place here. You are pack.”

 

The female inu cried and wrapped her arms around Sesshoumaru's neck as she hugged him. He returned her embrace and then instructed his brother to take her down to the dinning hall and get her some food. He left the room silently, intent on looking for his mate when he was stopped by Tiyeko.

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama…I'm not entirely used to this. Used to the feeling, or even sure that you should be the one I am asking, but you are the only male in her family, and the eldest I am aware of…”

 

“Go on,” he said to the kitsune.

 

“I'd like to ask for your blessing.”

 

“In what?” he asked when his friend stopped.

 

“I'd like to have the honor of courting Kashu-sama.”

 

Sesshoumaru remained quiet, his stoic mask in place. Once he decided that his friend had squirmed enough he smiled and chuckled softly. He put his hand on his friend's shoulder and nodded with a smile.

 

“You have my blessing.”

 

Tiyeko smiled brightly and then returned into the room to stand behind the subject of their discussion. He wrapped his arms around the human woman's waist and hugged her from behind, his tail wrapping around her waist. Sesshoumaru chuckled softly and left. Now where to start looking for Kagome? he thought.

 

Kagome sat in the same hiding spot as she had the other day. Her knees were drawn up to her chest with her arms wrapped about them tightly and she was rocking back and forth slowly as silent tears trekked down her cheeks. She had at first thought things would go well if she remained quiet and played the good wife, but now it only seemed to make things worse. Now she wasn't only dishonoring him, but she was hurting him as well. Her very presence must seem vile and disgusting to him.

 

She scrubbed at her face with the back of her hand. At first she thought about performing the ritual suicide here and now, she hard a dagger tucked into her obi. But she couldn't do that, not to these innocent children she carried inside of her. She took the dagger out of her obi and held it in her hands and stared at it. She sniffled and tucked it back into the folds of her obi and hugged her knees to her chest once more. There was only one thing she could do now. Once it grew dark she'd sneak away. She'd go to Kaede and stay with her until the pups were born. She'd be away from here. She'd loved it here so much, but she'd done enough harm for several lifetimes over. She'd shamed him enough.

 

It was nearing the mid day meal and Sesshoumaru still had not found his mate. He was flat out worried now, she'd never stayed away this long. Even her scent was hidden from him. What was wrong?!