InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ His Pain, Her Wish ❯ Chapter 3- Miroku's Confrontation ( Chapter 3 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter 3- Miroku's Confrontation

Three days later, the group had set off yet again from the village they had previously stayed at. The humans there had shown decent hospitality and the ladies had given plenty attention to the handsome monk. However, that had earned him quite a few lumps on top of his head, being hit by Sango's Hiraikotsu. Inuyasha and Kagome had barely spoken a word to each other, and if they did it was rather abrupt. They wouldn't look each other in the eye either. The taijiya and the houshi had taken to observing the two's actions which were far from normal. They both wondered what had happened the night Kagome went out on her own to find Inuyasha.

The miko had awoken to a terrible feeling that something was happening to the hanyou. However when Kagome came back, it was obvious to the monk and demon slayer that she had been crying. The young woman had taken to pulling her sleeping bag up over her raven head and ceasing contact with any of them. It was bad enough that Inuyasha and Kagome had barely spoken a word to each other since she had approached him that night, now Kagome wasn't speaking a word to anybody, including Shippou. The miko had found the hanyou having a terrible dream or so she thought. His forehead had been beaded with sweat, and he was whimpering Kikyou's name. Kagome didn't want to tell any of her friends that this was what she witnessed.

The very next day she had stayed inside of the hut buried in her sleeping bag, refusing to speak with anyone. The miko had not even wanted to budge, and when Sango came in to offer her food Kagome had declined it. They knew something was up. Something terrible had to of happened for the young priestess to completely close herself off like this. Inuyasha was spending a lot of time in the trees as well, his usual melancholy self since Kikyou had passed. Miroku had went after him, asking him to come down, but the hanyou just growled and ignored him, moving to another tree.

Later that evening, Kagome had finally come out of the hut. As she peered around the faint darkness of the small building for her friends, Kagome realized nobody was in there with her. She went outside to find Miroku and Sango sitting side by side talking quietly to each other. Polietly apologizing for the intrusion, Kagome let the others know she was up, awake and feeling refreshed from her day of resting. They had both been very happy to see that Kagome had gotten up and had asked how she was feeling. Kagome lied, putting on a false smile and told them she was fine. The houshi and slayer knew better as the watched Kagome tottering off towards the bath house. They had both spent the day near the hut, hearing her muffled sobs off and on throughout the day and the saddened whispers of Inuyasha's name. Something had happened between her and the hanyou and they wanted to get to the bottom of it without seeming too pushy or nosey.

The day they all left, Kagome seemed back to her normal, smiling and cheerful self except that she was not quite as talkative as she normally was. It was late afternoon, slowly approaching the evening. The air was cooling down and the sun's rays weren't quite so scorching. Shippou was down on the ground running around and frolicing with Kirara, laughing soundly while the firecat mewed back in playful response. Sango and Miroku walked side by side conversing quietly while Inuyasha walked a few feet ahead of the others. The hanyou's arms were folded up in the sleeves of his fire rat haori, and his snow white head bowed as if he were deep in thought.

Kagome was the same way, however she was not facing down. She was walking near Sango, gazing upward at the blue, sunny sky, shouldering her bow and quiver of arrows, keeping a firm hold on the bow's handle. The miko seemed to just be staring off into nothing. It was as if she weren't looking at the sky but rather her mind was elsewhere which was no surprise. Sango and Miroku could only guess Kagome was thinking about the inu-hanyou. Miroku cleared his throat, as though he were about to say something when he was cut off. The comrades were abruptly interrupted in their thoughts when a loud scream pierced the air.

"OWWWW!! OWW OWW OWWWWWWWW!!! It hurts! It hurts REEEEEEEEEALLY BAD!!!" came a howl from the little kitsune's mouth. Shippou lay sprawled out on the ground, bleeding somewhat rapidly from a newly formed cut in his leg. Inuyasha stopped and turned around to look down at the kit while Kirara hurred to his side, mewing worriedly.

The miko looked down at him as she was snapped from her thoughts and noticed a gash in his right leg. Shippou was crying loudly as he moved to sit on his bottom, clutching his wounded limb. Kagome breathed a small sigh of relief as she realized it was just an ordinary cut and of course Shippou being a child, would react over dramtically to it. Gazing around, her eyes fell on the trunk of a tree that had been freshly sliced. It was obvious the tree had been cut down for firewood or the like just recently. Nevertheless, it made a decent spot for Kagome to sit so she could fix up the kit's injured leg.

"Calm down and sit over here with me Shippou," stated Kagome, patting the trunk of the tree gently with her hand. "I'll take care of your leg for you," she added warmly.

"Are you okay there, Shippou?" asked Sango as she bent over, placing her hands on her knees. looking down at the kitsune's wound. "That looks like a pretty bad cut, how on ear-," the taijiya never got to finish what she was going to say.

Miroku had taken the advantage of groping her rear-end while Sango was checking on the little fox youkai's injury. He had a content smile on his face which earned a 'keh' from the hanyou and eye-rolls from Inuyasha and Kagome both.

"HENTAI!" yelled Sango as she raised a hand and slapped him gingerly across the face. "This is hardly the time! Shippou just got hurt you know!" she faced the monk, balling her fists at her sides as her left eye twitched.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't restrain myself seeing your flawless body bent over like that," replied Miroku with the strange grin still on his face. He rubbed the red handprint left on his cheek from the slayer's brutal hand. "I mean how often is it that you do bend over like that? Such a beautiful picture. It's the perfect opportunity for me to-," he attempted to finish before Sango was bearing down on him again.

"JUST BECAUSE I'M BENT OVER DOESN'T GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO GROPE AS YOU PLEASE, MONK!" the slayer snapped. "Keep your hands to yourself, you pervert!"

During the commotion between the lecherous monk and the fiesty taijiya, the little fox youkai whimpered loudly as he limped over to where Kagome sat. The miko just shook her head in an amused manner at the unchaste houshi and scooted a bit so Shippou would have room to sit next to her. The young priestess removed the giant, yellow bag from her back and sat it down next to her, flipping open the top. Kagome reached inside and removed a big first aid kit she always carried with her in case she or her comrades were in any type of danger and had injured themselves in the process. The kit scrambled up onto the tree trunk and snuggled next to Kagome, clutching his bleeding leg.

"Alright now Shippou, just calm down. We'll fix this right up for you," Kagome remarked soothingly to the little kit. The young priestess opened the big box and removed some gauze bandages and some of the medicinal ointment she had brewed up with Kaede the last time the gang had been in the village. Setting to work on the little youkai's leg, Kagome continued talking to help relax Shippou a bit. "So tell me, how exactly did you hurt your leg?"

"W-well, I was running with K-Kirara. We were chasing a f-f-few butterflies together and and I d-didn't see the big rock because I-I was too busy looking up at the b-butterflies," Shippou started to explain between sniffles. He never noticed that Kagome was rubbing the wound with the medicinal ointment now. He raised his little hands up to his face to wipe his eyes and nose and continued. "And and I t-tripped and f-fell on the rock and c-cut my l-leg open! It really hurts bad, Kagome!!" Fresh wails errupted from the little fox youkai but were soon silenced by Kagome's gentle voice.

"Well that sounds like quite a big fall you had there Shippou, but look!" Kagome began pointing down at the white bandages surrounding the kit's leg. "It looks like your wound is going to be just fine," she added reassuringly. The miko smiled down at the little fox youkai who's big, green eyes were glistening with tears. He looked down at his leg and smiled widely. The gash had been cleaned, treated with the ointment, and dressed to perfection.

"Thank you so much, Kagome!" Shippou exclaimed, leaping up to the girl and throwing his little arms around her neck.

Kagome just giggled as she hugged the little one back. "You're welcome, Shippou. That worked out nicely for you huh? So, does it still hurt?"

A rather pouty expression appeared back on the kitsune's face. "Yeah it does. I don't think I'll be able to walk for awhile," the little kit replied, with a faux whine behind his voice, sticking his bottom lip out somewhat. Kagome had to hold back a giggle, knowing that Shippou was just acting this way to get attention and compassion from his friends since he got hurt. Kirara lept up to Shippou and nuzzled him, mewing softly.

"Keh, let's just stop for a break so Shippou's leg can take a rest," came the hanyou's voice as his back stayed turned towards the others, his arms still folded. Inuyasha lifted his head to sniff the air around him. "Besides, I can smell water nearby. I'm sure you guys are hungry. It's nearing dinner time, anyway."

Before anybody could say anything, Inuyasha had taken off to where the river was flowing, his intentions to catch some fish for his friends. Kagome just stared somewhat sadly at the hanyou's retreating back. She reached down to the first aid kit, put the items used back in their proper place, flipped the lid shut and stuffed it back into her massive, yellow backpack. The girl pulled the bag back over her shoulders and sat on the stump, gazing at him and wondering if while he was fishing she could maybe get some time alone to talk with him? After thinking it over for a moment, she then decided that the attempt probably wouldn't even be worth it since the Inuyasha barely spoke to her anymore. Before she could stand, Kagome felt a large, warm hand place itself on her shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze.

"Are you going to go after him, Kagome-sama?" came the houshi's voice placidly.

Kagome sighed and stared up at Miroku, deep despondency in her eyes. Sango had now approached his side and gazed down at the miko as well as if trying to observe her feelings. It wasn't very hard to once the taijiya caught the look in Kagome's eyes. There was that remote kindness in both the slayer and the monk's gazes which made Kagome feel grateful for having these two as her friends. "It's hardly an option, is it? I mean what's the point? Even if I try to talk to him, he's just going to push me away again."

The miko stood up, gathering her things and stared up at Miroku and Sango. They looked down at the girl sympatheticlly, taking in the anguish she had written all over her face. Kagome had been trying so hard to stay cheerful and be herself, but every since Inuyasha had went into his tempermental mode and had been treating the hurt priestess the way he had, Kagome had just not been herself. "Sorry you guys, to get you involved in all of this," Kagome apologized quietly before heading in the same direction the hanyou had went.

"You've got to hand it to her, she's really strong for being able to put up with what she does from Inuyasha," Sango pointed out as the watched Kagome disappear behind the tall grass and trees.

Miroku could do nothing, but just nod his head slowly in agreement with the slayer. "I can only guess that it is because she loves him," the monk pointed out softly.

The young miko found herself going down a somewhat steep, tree-covered hill. Kagome was moving a bit too quickly for her liking as she continued downward towards the river. Nearly losing her footing, the miko had to gather her bearings before toppling over headfirst. As the young woman found herself coming closer and closer to the river, she heart quite a commotion coming from the water. Her eyes met Inuyasha's form as he attempted to catch the fish for her and the others. Kagome's instincts kicked in and she found a rather large boulder perched on the hill.

The miko hid behind it and peered over it's rocky surface, watching the hanyou catch one fish right after the other and rather noisily so. He was cursing at the fish and causing quite the splash as he dove for one right after the other. It was a rather comical sight and it almost seemed that the half youkai was back to his old self. Soon, Inuyasha had gathered a small pile of carp fish. Leaping out of the water, he crouched on all fours and shook himself off in a very dog-like way, spraying water in every direction nearly earning a giggle from Kagome. She clasped her hands over her mouth to hold it back.

The hanyou stood and gathered the fish by their tails in one clawed hand and began trudging back up the hill. As he advanced up the hill, Inuyasha stopped, flicked his ears and lifted his keen nose, sniffing around him. Hmmm, so she's nearby. I wonder if I should go find her? Kagome...if you only you knew how hard this was for me, to be so close to you and know that I might lose you too... the hanyou thought to himself as he picked up Kagome's gentle scent. He wondered if maybe he should follow her scent and find out where she was hiding, but decided against it. He needed to hurry and get the fish back to his friends so they could eat. After that he could scout out the area, making sure it would be a safe place for them to rest. So far it had. The air smelled pure and no youkai seemed to be in the area. Inuyasha gazed around the place they had come to, deciding that since it was nearing dusk, this would be the best place to set up camp since he didn't sense anything evil. The half youkai continued up the hill and right past where Kagome was hiding, pretending as if he didn't even sense her there.

Kagome released another sigh as she watched Inuyasha's face while he extended up the hill and back towards the group. She had caught the hanyou's expression and it was just as disconsolate as it had always been here recently, despite his facetious endevours in the lake. The girl moved from her hiding spot, hearing the happy cries initiating from Shippou. It was obvious Inuyasha had returned to the group with their dinner, and before long, she could smell the smoke coming from the fire, along with the scent of cooking fish. However, the miko didn't feel hungry. Instead, she got up from her hiding place and continued down the hill towards the water. Kagome peered down into the sparkling, blue depths, watching a small waterfall just a ways down the riverbed cascading down a series of several jagged rocks. The sun was lowering now, set about midway in the sky. The warm rays of light cast over the water made it appear as though it were shimmering.

The little miko found herself a comfortable spot in the grass and removed her bow, quiver of arrows and backpack from her back. I can take this time to get some work done while the others are eating. Hopefully I won't be going back home to a test...Kagome thought worriedly as she flipped open her algebra book and removed some paper and pencil from her bag. She studied the words and the numbers on the page, but soon found her mind wandering aimlessly. The book, pencil and paper lay completely forgotten as Kagome rolled onto her belly and began to touch her bow. She ran her hand down it's smooth, wooden base and fingers over the soft cloth that centered the weapon. Kagome soon found her mind completely lost from her school studies and venturing elsewhere as she stared at the weapon. Just from it's touch Kagome could feel the power flowing within the bow, the bow that should have went to Kikyou.

Kikyou...why did you have to die? Why couldn't I have been strong enough to save you? I thought I had, but...Kikyou, it's all my fault that you're not here anymore. I think even Inuyasha blames me for not being able to save you. That purifying arrow I shot...I really thought it would have saved you...it only purified you. I couldn't protect you, Kikyou, and I'm so sorry. If only I had the strength you did when you were alive, I could have saved you and Inuyasha would...he wouldn't be...

Oh Kikyou, what can I do? Inuyasha is hurting so much. He dreams of you all the time. I always hear him whisper your name when he thinks nobody is listening. I've heard him cry for you too. Can you give me some sort of strength or power to help him heal from this wound your leaving the world has given him? Do you have faith in me to save him? I know you don't want Inuyasha to die, Kikyou. I know you want him to continue on living. If you wanted him to die, you would have killed him when you were leaving the world of living too, wouldn't you have? Kikyou...did you leave Inuyasha for me?

The young miko was interrupted in her thoughts by a gentle tap on the shoulder. Kagome peered back over her shoulder slightly startled to see Sango crouched down next to her with a sweet smile on her face. Kagome sat up on her knees and smiled back. "You okay, Kagome-chan?" the taijiya questioned worriedly, keeping a hand over her friend's.

"Oh! Sango-chan...yeah, I was just working on some school work...or atleast trying to," the miko sighed as she lowered her head, gazing at her hands in her lap.

"This has got to be so hard for you, Kagome-chan. Have you tried talking to him?" the demon exterminator questioned curiously.

"Well, a little that night I went to find him. I almost got him to open up to me, but...he stopped before he got any further," Kagome sighed, laying back down on her stomach and resting her chin back into her hands.

"Kagome-chan, tonight's the night of the new moon, isn't it? Maybe with Inuyasha being in human form and being vulnerable, you can chance it? Maybe he'll open up his heart to you more tonight?" the slayer pointed out thoughtfully.

"Hmm that might not be a bad idea," Kagome said softly to herself. The saddened miko gazed up at the sun starting to set in the sky. "Sango-chan, do you think we can talk about this another time? Night hasn't fallen yet and I'm sure Inuyasha's senses are still really good. He might overhear us and I don't want to do anything at all to upset him."

"Of course, Kagome-chan, I understand. When you're ready to talk more about it, you know where to find me," Sango told her gently. She removed her hand from the Kagome's hand and stood up, smoothing out her long kimono. "You should really come up and have something to eat. It's not good to let yourself go too long without food," the slayer added before she walked away.

"Thanks Sango-chan. I'll be there in a little bit," Kagome told her as she sat back up the grass. She gathered her school things and shoved them back in her bag. There was no sense in studying now. Too much was going through the frustrated little miko's mind and she just couldn't concentrate. "I suppose I should try and eat something," Kagome said to herself as she closed up her bag, re-shouldered her new bow and quiver of arrows.

She carried her bag in one hand, nearly dragging it as she made her way back to camp. The sight that met Kagome's eyes was just as she expected. Sango and Miroku were already preparing the bedding for them to sleep in tonight while Shippou finished eating the last of his dinner. Inuyasha was standing a ways away from the group as he usually had done the past couple of weeks, staring off into space. Shippou's head perked up as Kagome approached the others and she sat her stuff down on the ground next to the sleeping bag Sango had prepared for her. Inuyasha flicked his ears and sniffed quietly as he picked up Kagome's scent, but just barely. The sun was nearly set in the sky. Tonight was the night of the new moon and Inuyasha would be human throughout the night. This didn't help his current situation in the least. Growling softly in frustration, the hanyou walked away from where he was standing and back out towards the trees, leaving his comrades to stare in a somewhat confused manner at his retreating form

Did he growl because of Kagome-sama joining us again? The houshi thought to himself, rubbing the bottom of his chin with his finger and staring harshly at Inuyasha.

He had sensed their confusion and Kagome's as well, but hers seemed to dig deeper than confusion, something that the hanyou couldn't even bring himself to comprehend at the moment. However at this point nothing at all mattered to Inuyasha. He was in this alone. He had to face his pain alone and whether he would surpass it and live or it would slowly kill him would be up to Inuyasha. What the hell did they know anyway? They weren't suffering from Kikyou's death like he was. The hanyou had to admit though, that the dream of Kikyou he had experienced a few nights ago had somewhat comforted his heart, but not to the point of making all of his pain go away. It was still so hard to just pick up his feet and move on.

Kikyou...what were you trying to tell me that night I was dreaming of you? What is so important...who will heartbroken if I continue to hurt? Did you mean Kagome? Why would Kagome be heartbroken if I'm the one that's hurting? Kikyou...you told me that I shouldn't hurt anymore, but how do you expect me to just shut something off like that? What more is there for me in this world with you being gone? The night you left me, it was as if you were carrying my soul with you. I feel like I'm just deteriorating without you here anymore. Kikyou...you had said her voice would bring me back. Who's voice did you mean? How could something like that bring me back? I don't understand, Kikyou. Will you come and see me again? Will you see me in another dream and explain more to me? Will you continue to comfort my heart while I sleep?

Inuyasha made his way down the grassy slope back out towards the river once more. He stared down at his hands as he slowly felt the demonic energy leave his body. The hanyou watched his long claws slowly shrink until they reached just below his fingertips. His long tresses of hair changed from ivory to raven. Inuyasha felt his dog ears move down his head to appear along his jawline reforming themselves into a fine human shape, and Inuyasha's eyes changed from a deep amber hue to stormy blue-grey. He closed his eyes as the powerless sensation brushed over his body and the hanyou turned human clenched his fists angrily at his sides. Inuyasha loathed being in this form. He was always overwhelmed with human emotions and human weaknesses. Given his state of mind about Kikyou at the present time, being human didn't solve his problem. If anything it made him feel worse and that infuriated him.

Inuyasha seated himself against a rather tall tree, staring at the river water as it gently sloshed downstream from the impact of the waterfall. Right now, for the first time in a very long time, the hanyou turned human felt alone. He felt like he had been abandoned in the world with nobody there to keep him going or nobody there to share the feelings that he was experiencing. His mother had died and left him, he never knew his father, and Kikyou was gone now too. Then, without warning, Inuyasha felt the overwhelming innervation of wanting Kagome next to his side, comforting him and reminding him that she was there for him.

Kagome could be there with him, and Inuyasha never realized that until just now. He truly wasn't alone. Kagome was always by his side through everything he had been through. She had thrown herself over him to protect him numerous times, even burnt her feet in youkai acid for his sake. That day he had thought to himself that he was truly happy that Kagome was by his side. She had embraced him the night he had awoken from that dream of Kikyou. This feeling was stretching him, ripping at him inside with invisible claws. This insatiable urge to have Kagome next to him was nearly shredding the hanyou turned human's insides. He knew if he allowed Kagome any further into his heart, that if Naraku got wind of the deep feelings he had always carried for Kagome, that the miko would be his next target. If Naraku's spiderwebs tainted Kikyou to the point of killing her, surely he'd do the same thing to Kagome? All these thoughts rushed through Inuyasha's mind as he sat gazing at the star-filled, moonless firament when it hit him.

Kagome...that night you held me in your arms, told me that you were there for me, I never wanted you to let go of me. All the times you've been there for me, you have no idea how much they all mean to me. I've watched you shed so many tears for me and in return I've done nothing but always want to protect you. What I want more than anything right now is to feel your embrace. I want to feel your touch, holding me. I want to hear your voice reassuring me that everything will be okay.. It had been so comforting, as if you were sharing my pain, but how could you be?

I wish you were here with me right now, Kagome but I'm scared. I don't know how to stop pushing you away from me and I know it's probably hurting you, but I'm doing it for a reason. I mean it's got to be hurting you, but you must understand why. I just don't know how to tell you. I know you've always been there by my side, but now, you're in even more danger than maybe even you realized...but then again you've always been in danger when you're next to me, and that never stopped you before. Kagome...I don't want Naraku to see how deeply my feelings run for you. He'll use you against me to try and do everything he can to destroy me...I don't want that to happen to you, Kagome. I don't want to see you suffer like Kikyou did.

Inuyasha was interrupted in his thoughts by a sigh coming from behind him. He turned his dark head towards where the source of the sound came from and gazed up at the form of Miroku. He walked past the hanyou turned human and seated himself on the ground cross-legged in front of Inuyasha. The monk stared fixedly into the hanyou's grey-blue orbs as though trying to determine the best way to engage in a conversation.

"What the hell do you want?" Inuyasha asked arrogantly, turning his head upward and closing his eyes. He kept his arms folded inside of his fire rat haori. Miroku confronting him was the last thing he needed right now.

"You and I need to have a talk, man to man," Miroku stated simply, resting his staff across his lap, causing it to jingle softly. Inuyasha could tell that the monk wasn't about to get up and move anytime soon.

"Keh, what's there to talk about?" Inuyasha questioned, looking back at the houshi and trying to keep the angry expression on his features.

"We need to talk about what you're doing to Kagome-sama," the houshi replied, slightly glaring now at the hanyou turned human.

"What! What do you mean what I'm doing to Kagome!? I haven't done a DAMN thing to her!" the boy snapped at Miroku.

"That's exactly the point I'm trying to make, Inuyasha. Every since Kikyou-sama passed away, you've done nothing but neglect Kagome-sama," Miroku sighed with a shake of his head. "I'm not the only one who's noticed it either."

"Neglect! How the fuck am I neglecting her! It's not like she's going around starving to death or anything!" the half youkai shot back. If anything this conversation was not helping his already bad temper.

"Well let's see, you don't carry Kagome on your back anymore, you don't speak to her, whenever she even remotely attempts to approach you, you run off from her and leave her hurting and confused," Miroku began, holding his head up with his eyes closed. As he named each fault, he counted them out on his fingers further irritating Inuyasha who was now growling through clenched teeth. Once he quieted, the monk leaned over really close to Inuyasha's face, staring at him intently before raising his fist and bashing the hanyou turned human over the head.

"HEY! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR!?" Inuyasha exploded, leaping towards Miroku with his fists balled up.

The monk just kept his head up, lips pursed and eyes half lidded as he stared at Inuyasha sardonically. It was almost as if the hanyou's rage was boring him. "That was supposed to make you realize that YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE HURTING HERE!" shouted the houshi as he now stood up, towering over Inuyasha. Even though he was a hanyou in his human form, the terrible power eminating off of the monk's body was almost like lightning threatening to strike him. Only a few times had Inuyasha ever witnessed this and it was usually when somebody had threatened Sango's life. It could be somewhat frightening. If Inuyasha hadn't been in human form tonight, he probably wouldn't have felt slightly fearful from Miroku's sudden accost.

"KAGOME-SAMA HAS SACRIFICED A LOT FOR YOU! SHE'S DONE NOTHING BUT TRY AND BE THERE FOR YOU! YOU'RE JUST TOO MUCH OF A BAKA TO REALIZE THAT!" the monk continued roaring at the rather shocked hanyou sitting on the ground.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO!? JUST JUMP INTO KAGOME'S ARMS!? DON'T YOU FUCKING GET IT MIROKU!? WHY DO YOU THINK ONE OF THE REASONINGS BEHIND NARAKU ENDING KIKYOU'S LIFE WAS!?" Inuyasha bellowed back at the monk, taking him by slight surprise.

"Why should it matter the reasonings behind Naraku taking Kikyou-sama's life? Are you that worried that Naraku is going to try and do the same thing to Kagome-sama if he realizes what's happening between the two of you? It's delusive, Inuyasha because we know the feelings you have for Kagome-sama! Are you just going to continue on hurting her the way you have been because of Kikyou? We all know that you miss her, Inuyasha, but does that mean you're going to completely shove Kagome-sama's feelings aside as if they were nothing?" the monk questioned, staring derisively straight into the hanyou's eyes.

He didn't stop for a moment to give Inuyasha a chance to speak. It was almost as if Miroku had been wanting to let him know all of this for awhile now. "Are you just going to continue to let her run on the cold, hard ground and try to keep up the pace with us? I know you haven't been carrying her. Her feet are sore and her legs hurt from trying to keep up with you, but have you ever once heard her complain? Of course not. Kagome-sama doesn't want to feel like she's a nuisance to you! She's done nothing but try and comfort you for the past two weeks. You just keep pushing her away. Before you know it, we're going to lose Kagome-sama and then what will you do? Inuyasha, there is more in this world than just Kikyou. We all know how you felt about Kikyou-sama, but Kagome-sama is still here, so are you going to just up and forget about her completely?"

Inuyasha stood with his arms folded and averted his anger-filled eyes towards the ground, not able to meet Miroku's look anymore. Everything that houshi was saying...was it all really true? Had he really been that cold to Kagome? He hadn't been carrying her like usual, and she was on the ground a lot more except for in necessary circumstances when she couldn't make it over a cliff or boulder on her own. He hadn't been speaking to her like normal, but hell he hadn't even been speaking to anybody. The hanyou didn't want to discuss Kikyou's death nor his feelings with anyone. This was his pain, his problem and he'd deal with it on his own.

"I...I never wanted to just shove Kagome's feelings aside. I...I can't talk about this with you Miroku," the hanyou turned human stated as he continued to stare at the ground. He picked up his feet and walked briskly past the monk, still not making eye contact with him. I'm sorry, Miroku...I know what you were trying to say but I need some time to think about things...

Inuyasha, you're such a fool...you don't even realize that Kagome-sama is here and ready to offer you the comfort you need. Or maybe you do and you choose not to accept it? We all know Kagome-sama isn't Kikyou, but there is no excuse for you to treat her the way you have been. The houshi thought furiously as he watched Inuyasha's departing form. He kept his eyes on the hanyou turned human until he disappeared in the darkness. Miroku sighed, closed his eyes and shook his head before heading back to camp. As he reapproached his comrades, Miroku saw Kagome. The miko was sitting up by the fire, hugging her knees up to her chest and resting her chin on her folded arms as she gazed into the dancing flames. Sango was curled up in a sleeping bag, dozing next to the miko. Miroku approached them quietly and seated himself next to Kagome.

"I've just been to see Inuyasha," the houshi told the girl as he laid his staff down next to him.

"Oh? Did you guys talk much?" Kagome asked, peeking her head up in interest.

"Not so much. However I do feel that he should not be alone tonight. He's by the river. Why don't you go down and try to talk to him?" Miroku suggested as he began warming his cold hands in front of the fire.

"You really think he'll listen to me?" Kagome asked sadly, staring up at the houshi.

"He's in his human form tonight. We all know that this is Inuyasha's most vulnerable state. I think if you were to try and get anywhere with him tonight would be it," the monk pointed out.

"Hmmm, yes I suppose you're right. I'll go see him then," the miko nodded, rising to her feet and brushing off her skirt. The girl turned to go out towards the river, but she stopped and turned back for a moment. "Thanks, Miroku-sama," Kagome obliged. Miroku just smiled back as Kagome left the camp and walked down the familiar hill she had earlier.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome called softly in the darkness. She peered around trying to get her eyes to adjust, but it was so dark that she could barely see a thing. "Inuyasha, where are you?" The miko continued down the hill slowly, holding her hands out in front of her in case she ran into anything. "Inuyasha please. You've got to be somewhere!" Kagome gasped as she felt herself run into something soft and warm. She felt two hands grasp onto her arms before she felt herself being drawn into a tight, warm and comforting embrace. "Inuyasha," the miko whispered as she buried her face into Inuyasha's fire rat haori, taking in his masculine scent.

"Kagome," came his voice softly above her ear. He continued to hold the girl tightly and Kagome returned the favor. The young woman wrapped her arms around his waist and held onto him as if she never wanted to let go of him.

"You know, you really shouldn't be out here all alone," the miko scolded gently. "Not on a night like tonight." The hanyou didn't respond. He just continued to hold Kagome close to his chest. Kagome's heart lept into her throat as she felt the hanyou turned human's body began to tremble as they held one another. "I-Inuyasha? Are you...are you okay?"

"I'll...be okay," he replied still continuing to hold her. "I just...need you to be here by me right now. It's just...I hate being human," Inuyasha admitted to her.

"Well, it's really dark and somewhat cold," Kagome stated, feeling her body errupt with goosebumps. Whether or not they were from the chilly night or from Inuyasha holding her so close, Kagome wasn't sure. It felt like it had been ages since she was held like this by him. "Why don't we atleast start a fire or go back to camp?"

"No," replied Inuyasha hoarsely. "Let's just go sit by the river. The stars are bright and if we can get out of the trees, it won't be so dark."

"Alright then," the confused miko nodded her head.

She felt the hanyou turned human's hand close warmly over her own and she squeezed his gently back. Why on earth is Inuyasha acting this way? Had Miroku possibly said something to him that might have changed his mind on things? The two made their way down the rest of the hill before Kagome finally could see where she was going. The stars were sparkling off of the water's ripples and she gazed upward as the two seated themselves. Every moonless night that the miko could recall did it seem that the stars twinkled and shone even more brighter than usual in the massive, midnight blue blanket above them.

Atleast tonight...Naraku won't know I'm with her. He won't know I'm close to her...He won't know my feelings for her. As long as I can continue to hold up my front, Naraku won't have an advantage to her. "Kagome...I'm sorry," Inuyasha began softly as he sat cross-legged on the ground, watching the consecutive flow of the river. "I haven't been myself lately."

"It's okay, Inuyasha. It's been hard for all of us recently. As time goes though, things will get better," the miko encouraged him. However, she watched the hanyou visibly shake his head.

"It's not okay, Kagome...I don't know why I feel the way I do or I am the way I am right now. I don't know if I'll ever really feel better," he admitted. "Things are just...Kikyou...you...she...," the boy struggled to find the proper words.

"Can you...can you tell me about it? Can you talk to me about Kikyou?" Kagome asked softly. "I mean if you can tell me, maybe it'll help you feel better? I promise I'm not going to get angry," she added as an afterthough, hoping that this might help the hanyou open up to her more.

"Keh," came Inuyasha's reply. "I...I don't know if I can talk about it. I mean, talking about it isn't exactly going to bring her back, is it?" His voice was becoming somewhat defensive now and he felt Kagome draw slightly away from him. If he had his dog ears tonight, they would definantly be drooping as her touch left his. "Dammit, I didn't mean it like that, Kagome," he sighed apologetically.

"I...I understand, I think. You can...tell me about it when you're ready I suppose. I just want to know...how can I make this easier for you?" the miko questioned softly, drawing her knees up once more.

Inuyasha studied the girl next to him. Why did this have to be so hard? Why did he have to go and hurt her again? He could tell by the way her body language was that she was hurting. But so was he, and how was he supposed to cope with that? Dammit, I just went and fucked up again! I can't do this right now! I can't talk about this yet. I'm not ready to. I'm sorry Kagome...I wish I could just come out and say the feelings I feel for you, but at the same time...Kikyou...her passing...it's just too soon. I can't just open my heart to you yet.

"Dammit, I'm sorry Kagome," the boy reiterated. "I just...this is too soon. I just can't do this right now." Panic was taking over his body now. If he opened himself up to Kagome, what could happen? What if he allowed Kagome to completely tranquilize him. What would happen then between him and the miko? Inuyasha stood up and began walking away from Kagome when the confused priestess lept to her feet. No way in HELL was she going to allow this man to walk away from her once more, leaving her abashed and not knowing what to do or say.

"Wait just a minute!" the little miko cried out in fiesty tones. She hurried up to the hanyou turned human and grabbed ahold of his arm. "It's just as simple as that?! How can you just embrace me like that for one minute and then push me away the next?! Why can't you tell me about things that are bothering you?! Why can't you explain to me your feelings?! If you didn't care about me, you wouldn't have held me like that, nor would you have let me hold you the other night either, Inuyasha! So what is it you're hiding from me?! I know you're hurting because of Kikyou, I understand that! However, what I don't understand is the way you keep running from me whenever we get close to breakthrough!" Kagome shouted now, not caring if she was going to upset him anymore. All Inuyasha had been doing was sending her mixed signals and quite honestly, the miko was growing tired of it.

"It's not like that! I just...," Inuyasha began as he tugged his arm forcefully from Kagome's grasp. "IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE!" he turned around, shouting at the young miko. "My...my feelings are complicated!"

Kagome drew back from him gasping lightly. Here it was, she was trying so hard to be there for him, to help comfort him and console him. She wanted to be the one to pick up and mend the broken pieces of his heart, but as long as the half-dog demon kept pushing her away, how on earth would Kagome be able to do that? Kagome stood firm, balling her small hands into tight fists as she watched him start to walk away.

NO CHANCE! HE IS NOT WALKING AWAY FROM ME THIS TIME! The miko gritted her teeth together, baring them slightly and felt the anger billow up inside of her now. Kagome was about to take a step forward to chase him when she felt something cold and slimpy wrap around her leg. Before the miko had a chance to see what had grabbed ahold of her, she was jerked roughly backward. The girl landed hard on her belly and she screamed. Kagome was being dragged regressively towards the riverbed.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! INUYASHAAAAAAAA!" cried out the defenseless young priestess. She grasped at the small rocks littering the ground, trying to find something to hold onto, but to no avail.

Inuyasha whirled around gasping, his eyes widening as he watched Kagome being dragged forcefully towards the river. She was just inches away from it. Her hands reached out to him as he ran towards the helpless miko. "KAGOMEEEEEEEE!"

Inuyasha lept through the air, trying to land close to her, but his human legs were nowhere near as strong nor powerful as his hanyou ones. The hanyou turned human ran as fast as his legs would allow him to. His eyes for Kagome, Inuyasha held out his hands to her, hoping to get to her before whatever had ahold of her pulled the miko under the water. Inuyasha was just about to jump once more when he tripped and lost his footing. He landed hard on the ground, crashing right next to Kagome. Without a second thought, Inuyasha reached out and grabbed the miko's hand. The two clung to each other, their fingertips curling into one another as Kagome held on for dear life.

"INUYASHA, PLEASE!" Kagome pleaded. "DON'T LET GO OF ME!"

"KAGOME HOLD ON!" Inuyasha replied back. "JUST TRY AND HOLD ON!"

Their fingertips were slowly losing strength and the powerful hold on Kagome's leg broke the two apart. Inuyasha made a desperate swipe to grab Kagome's hand, but all he grasped was air. The defenseless miko's body was being pulled down into the river. The only thing that could be heard was her piercing scream before her head plunged forcefully under the surface of the rushing river.