InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Home for the Holidays ❯ Revelations ( Chapter 4 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Disclaimer: I still don’t own Inu & Co., although I’ll be looking under my tree Sunday morning.  I have no intention of infringing on the rights of the remarkable Rumiko Takahashi, et al.

The meal over and no real excuses remaining, Kagome gestured at their surroundings.  “Exactly what is this place?”

The young hanyou shrugged as he gathered the dirty dishes for cleaning a bit later.  “I stay here sometimes when you’re gone.  There’s only so many times I can stand watching Sango pummel that ecchi monk, and the runt knows exactly how to get under my skin.”

Looking around, she realized that this was no simple abandoned hut--this was a home.  The sleeping bag upon which they sat was supported by a thick layer of sweet-smelling straw.  Shelves lining the walls held a variety of cooking or eating utensils, jars of seasoning and healing herbs (though not nearly as extensive a collection as old Kaede possessed), neatly folded blankets and other household goods, and even a section of shelf that held the school books she’d left behind.

Something about the whole situation nagged at her, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.  “But where did all of this come from?”

He shrugged.  “When you’re not here or the weather’s too bad to travel, I sometimes get bored.  When that happens, I usually just go out to hunt or cut firewood.  Once in a while I’d find a stray goat or a young boar and bring it back.  I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but the village now has fair-sized herds of both.  I guess the turning point came last spring.  One of the village pups wandered off, and his mother came to me and asked if I could find him.  I went back to her hut and got his scent from the blanket he slept in.  Anyway, I found the pup--he’d gotten himself treed by a big boar.  I brought them both back.  The pup’s mother roasted the boar for a village celebration, and his father offered me this place.  It was just standing here empty since his brother was killed in an accident a few years ago.  It was the first real sign that I was accepted here.  After that, whenever I’d help out any particular individual or family, they’d always give me a little something: a blanket, a bowl, a flask of lamp oil--whatever they could spare.  It’s almost like I’m one of them.”

His rough whisper made her realize exactly how much this acceptance meant to him.  “Of course they do,” she said.  “Only a few of the people in the village were even alive when you were sealed, and they were all little kids then.  Sure, they’ve been hearing stories about the ‘evil hanyou’ that attacked and burned down the village, but they seem willing to trust their own experience instead of some old stories.”

He shook his head slowly.  “It’s never really been about what happened.  It’s always been because of what I am.”  He looked away, his ears flattened against his skull.  Just maybe, he thought, this hadn’t been such a good idea after all.

She wasn’t going to let him back out now.  He had gone to a lot of effort to arrange all this, and she was determined to get to the bottom of it.  “Which thing?  You’re beautiful, strong, brave and loyal.  You always honor your commitments, and will do anything in your power to protect those who are weaker than you.”

He shook his head.  “No matter what, I’m still hanyou.  That’s all most people ever see.”

“Maybe,” she said, “But that’s their loss.  Now,” she continued, “Why did you bring me here tonight--really?”

He fidgeted a moment, then stilled as he seemed to reach a decision.  “What you said before was wrong--I fully intend to put somebody in danger. Although I’m pretty sure that I can keep them safe all the same.”

She wasn’t too sure what to make of that.  “I don’t under--”

He silenced her with a curt gesture.  “Let me get this out now, or I may not be able to get it out at all.”  At her expectant look he continued, “Like I said, I’m hanyou.  That, more than anything, is what got my mother killed.  If I hadn’t been born, or if I’d been killed at birth, she might still be alive, especially if the other humans could convince themselves that she didn’t go to my father of her own accord--that she’d been violated by the evil youkai.”  His voice grew thick with loathing.  “She’d probably have been an outcast, shunned by the other humans, but she would only have been considered unclean, not a traitor to her kind.”

He took a long breath, mentally reliving his mother’s murder at the hands of her own people.  When he could once again trust his voice, he went on, “That’s the main reason I’ve been such an ass a lot of the time: I couldn’t stand the thought of you being treated the way she was.  The problem is, I’m really a selfish bastard, and I want you with me anyway.”

Even though she realized that she probably sounded like an idiot, all she could manage was a faint squeak.  “With…you?”

His ears flattened briefly until he realized that her scent was laced with confusion rather than anger, as it would be if she found him truly repulsive.  Maybe she really didn’t understand.  “I want you for myself, Kagome.  I know it’s a lot to ask, but I’m asking anyway.  I want you to marry me in the human tradition, and be my mate in the youkai way.  Look,” he said, dropping to the soft bedding next to her, his face and tone serious, “This isn’t anything new.  It’s all I’ve really wanted since we visited Jinenji--maybe even before that.  I always thought I’d have all the time in the world, but then you got lost in the storm--”  His voice choked off as he contemplated the endless string of “what ifs” that had haunted him throughout her recovery.

Though she somehow managed to keep them from falling, he could see--and smell--the tears gathering in her eyes.  In a near panic, he almost missed the whispered, “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to worry you…”

He stopped and blinked in surprise.  “Worry me?  Worry me!  Damn, wench, you almost gave me a…What do you call those things you’re always telling me I’m going to give the jijii?”

She managed a faint smile.  “A heart attack?”

“Yeah.  One of those.” This time the smile was different than any she’d seen before: genuine, unguarded.  He wagged a finger under her nose.  “You still didn’t answer me, wench.”

Suddenly bringing her brain back on line, she looked at him seriously.  “Maybe you better explain to me exactly what you’re asking.”

He raised an arm to being her closer to him.  Once she was firmly seated against his side, he began his explanation with a soft chuckle.  “You’re not a pup, wench--you have to know what it means to take a mate.”

With a light swat to his chest, she laughed, “Of course I do, baka.  You just made it sound like there was something different about the youkai way of mating.”

He frowned thoughtfully for a few seconds.  “It’s not the same thing as a human marriage, if that’s what you’re asking.  The lower youkai--the vermin that do nothing but kill and feed indiscriminately--don’t take mates in the same sense as the higher youkai, like Sesshomaru and the others we know.  They just come together when they need to reproduce, then go their separate ways, except for some of the bug youkai that eat their mates.  A lot of the higher youkai that are as smart as we are but don’t have a humanlike form don’t take life mates either.  They join when they need to reproduce, but they’re different in that they actually take care of the young.  Kirara’s that kind of youkai.  The higher youkai that can take a human form are different, though.  Most of them mate for life.  They also mark their mates to warn other youkai away.”  At the sudden spike of curiosity in her scent, he tried to explain.  “It’s probably not what you think.  You’ve most likely seen the scars some kinds of youkai put on each other, but that’s not what I’m talking about.  First of all, every kind of youkai handles this differently.  Some--like that filthy wolf--bite each other to mark their mates.  The inuyoukai are kind of above that sort of thing.  When they take a mate, their youki leaves a mark on each other without any pain or blood involved.  Now,” he said, pulling her a little tighter against his side, “I don’t know how much of this is applicable to me, since I’m hanyou,  but I figured you should know all the possibilities.”

“What if you change your mind?”

He shook his head.  “Under youkai law, that’s not really an option.  If you were to decide that you didn’t want to be with me any more, I think I could probably let you go, just because I don’t want you to be miserable.  Two youkai bind their lives together when they take a mate, so that if something happens to one, the other usually follows soon after.  Again, I’m hanyou, so I don’t know how much of this could apply to me, and you’re human, but you’re also the most powerful miko in a long time, so I don’t really know what might happen.  In any case,” he continued, “That’s why it took me so long to grow a spine and tell you all this--in a race that mates for life, we don’t dare make a mistake.”

“But I’m human,” she said.  “Won’t I get old and die long before you?  I don’t want you to follow me into death or live for centuries alone.  More than anything else, I want you to live, and be happy.”

He shrugged.  “Isn’t it just as likely that your lifespan would extend to match mine?”  He carefully encircled her with an arm, pulling her even closer.  “So,” he said, “What do you think?”

“I think,” she said, blushing furiously, “That there’s nothing I’d like better.  It’s really all I’ve wanted ever since I can remember.  But there’s just one thing.”

Ears straining forward at full alert as he realized that she wasn’t rejecting him, he asked, “What thing is that?”

She shook her head slowly.  “I really need to tell my mother before we do this.  I don’t think she’ll have any objections--she adores you--but I owe her that respect.”

He shook his head.  “No,” he said.  “We need to tell your mother--and the jijii.  By rights, I should have done it before ever talking to you about it, but I thought I’d have plenty of time.  Look,” he said, “The well should be cleared in a day or two, so I think we’ll have to get you home and take care of this as soon as it is.”

“Impatient?”  Her tone had become light and teasing.

He shook his head.  “Impatient isn’t exactly the right word, but it’ll have to do.”  He grinned at the yawn she tried to suppress.  “You’re tired.  You’re still not completely recovered.  But before you sleep, I want you to have this.”  Reaching into his haori, he extracted the wad of blue silk he had recovered from its hiding place.  “It was my mother’s--a gift from my father.”  When she made no move to reach for the object, he unwrapped it, extending the shining sphere hanging from a fine silver chain in her direction.

“It’s beautiful,” she said.  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like it before.”

He smirked.  “Not surprising, wench.  This is the only one there is--my father had it commissioned for my mother by a youkai smith to protect her when he couldn’t be there to do it himself.”  Reaching forward, he slipped the chain over her head.  “He always thought that the greatest danger to her was from youkai trying to get at him through her--he never thought she would be in danger from her own people.  This jewel will not only erect a barrier around you in the event of a youkai attack, but it will also alert me in case you’re hurt, or scared, or in some other kind of trouble.”

Although she wanted nothing more than to continue the conversation, she really was almost too tired to make her eyes focus.  Curling up against his side, she was asleep almost before he could pull the blankets up around them.
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