InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ In a Different Light ❯ Lost and Found ( Chapter 21 )

In a Different Light

Chapter 20: Lost and Found

After their "bath" Rin was too exhausted to even think about eating. She pulled out a blanket, curled up into a tight little ball and fell fast asleep with one thought on her mind-he loved her. With his own words in his own voice, with his own mouth, he'd told her.

True, it wasn't very romantic. He said it more like one might say "The grass is green," or "Water is wet." But . . . that was a good thing, wasn't it? The grass would always be green. Water would always be wet. And he would always love her.

Someone loved her. He loved her. After all these years, someone finally loved her.

She smiled to herself as sleep finally claimed her and the sounds of the waking world silently slipped away. What a wonderfully comfortable thought to cushion her descent into dreamland.

Sesshomaru sat across the clearing in his usual spot and listened as her heart rate calmed and her breathing settled into a slow, even pace. He would have held her while she napped, but it simply wasn't practically. There were a few things he needed to attend to while she slept, and he couldn't do that with any level of confidence if she was slumped against his shoulder.

He focused his attention on his retainer, who was currently shuffling about the campsite, preparing things for their departure in the morning. Three days had passed, and it was high time they got on their way. He had the border to patrol, a council meeting to host and some research to do. He wasn't certain, but he seemed to recall that one, if not both, of the bonding rites had to be completed at the same time as the marking ritual. If he got ahead of himself and marked her without knowing how to correctly perform the bonding rite, that would be it. No second chances. Rin could spend the rest of her life with him-a brief fifty years or so-but eternity would be lost to them forever.

So certainly, he could keep his instincts at bay for another two weeks. As he, himself, had said, there were other ways to keep themselves entertained. And if Rin's recent performance was any indication of her aptitude for those "other" activities, there wouldn't be a moment of boredom shared between them.

Yes, the two weeks would be . . . mildly uncomfortable, especially with her sleeping by his side every night, her scent filling his nostrils, her body warming his flesh, her inhales and exhales and little murmurs during the night stimulating his senses . . . He drew in a deep, but unnoticeable breath and pushed it out. You are not an animal, he reminded himself. Only an animal lives on instinct alone.

He forced his demon blood to recede and settle, looking away from his slumbering mate, pretending to have heard something off in the distance.

"My lord?" Jakken questioned.

"It is nothing, Jakken. Attend to your duties."

The toad nodded.

If you are too aggressive, he reminded himself, you'll frighten her. Despite what she says and what she is willing to do, you do . . . intimidate her. Her actions in the cavern were proof enough of that. She is still uncertain of this new aspect of your relationship, so you must be patient not only with her, but for her.

It was unfortunate, but it was understandable-the difference in age, the differing ways of expressing themselves. It wasn't surprising that she felt a little uncomfortable. He, himself, was

a little . . . unnerved by the emotions she so easily evoked in him.

He didn't want to let her go this morning.

It had been so long since he'd needed . . . anything. If he wanted something, someone

was always more than willing to simply give it to him, and if not, he had no qualms at all about taking it. He was the Lord of the Western Lands, after all, and everything in his territories rightfully belonged to him. "Need" was just another useless word in his extensive vocabulary, like "cold" or "sickness." He never felt the cold, he'd never become sick, and he never needed anything.

To need, as he had learned, meant to require something because it was essential or very important, or it referred to a state of poverty, distress or misfortune. And, until recently, it had no meaning to him. Poverty? Distress? Misfortune? Something essential or very important to him?

Nonsense.

True, he had thought he needed Tessaiga at one point. But he later discovered that was simply a want. He wanted his father's former sword, but InuYasha needed it. His brother couldn't function properly without it. He wanted it to increase his powers; InuYasha needed it to maintain his sanity.

No, he did not need Tessaiga, but he did need Rin.

He took a chance and, again, let his golden eyes rove over the sleeping form of his mate. Having been with her, he didn't ever want to be without her. He needed her. She was the one thing he'd been missing all these years, and he'd be damned if he lost it simply because he couldn't control his youkai instincts.

An eternity without his Rin was not something he wished to face.

He scoffed inwardly. There were those emotions again.

"Jakken."

He scampered over to his feet. "Yes, lord?"

"This Sesshomaru has a job for you."

* * *

When Rin awoke, the sun had already set, and Jakken had already started the fire for the evening. She sat up before the warm, dazzling display of reds, yellows and oranges and stared across the clearing at Sesshomaru as she wiped the sleep out of her eyes. "I guess I was more tired than I thought," she yawned.

He kept his reply to a simple nod.

"Where're Jakken and Ah-Un?" She'd thought Jakken had started the fire, but glancing around, she found their usual spots empty... and quite a bit of their belongings gone. "And everything else for that matter?"

"We will meet back up with them in two days."

"Where'd they go?"

"I sent them on an errand."

Rin nodded her understanding and gave a slight smile.

"Are you troubled?"

She shook her head. "No, not at all. It's just a . . . surprise. I mean, I went to sleep, and they were here. I woke up, and now they're gone."

He gave a slight nod. "Are you well?"

She noticed that he seemed to be studying her, watching her, gauging her response to everything he said, noting every little move she made . . . perhaps for discomfort. "It's fine," she said. "I mean, I'm fine."

He nodded again.

She was fine. She felt fine. No pain, no real soreness . . . She just felt as if something

were... missing.

She hid a sly smile. Of course, something was missing. Her virginity was missing. She'd given it away, let him take it. So it wasn't really missing; it was just . . . gone.

Her sly smile turned into a tiny bout of the giggles, which she quickly tried to cover up with the palm of her hand. She wondered if anyone could tell? If anyone would notice? Did she look different now? Did she . . . smell any different?

Rin rolled her eyes and forced herself to settle down. What silly things to think. What stupid things to wonder . . . But, if she really wanted to know, she knew at least one person she could ask.

She stood and smoothed out the wrinkles in the skirt of her kimono. "I'd like to go, now, if that's all right."

He nodded and then stood, as well.

She raised an eyebrow at him. "You're going with me?" she asked.

"I must protect what is mine."

She stared at him for a minute in utter disbelief. The first time, even knowing his objections, she'd begged and pleaded with him to go with her, and he'd refused outright, saying that she'd always gone off on her own, so why should this time be any different? The second time, he went only to retrieve her after he'd cooled down from his dealings with Takeda and she'd run off to the festival to get some food. And now . . .

"Are we not going?" he asked.

She walked around the fire and crossed to his side of the clearing. "Yes."

By the gods, she wondered as they walked down the forest trail, was this what it was like to be mated to a demon? Would he be following her everywhere from now on?

She pulled her fingers through her hair, attempting to make it look as neat as possible. Yes, she loved him. Yes, she enjoyed his company. But this was just going to make them both miserable.

They'd stayed there all of what? Five, ten minutes the last time they were there? Fifteen, twenty minutes tops. And she could tell he hated every minute of it-turning up his nose, stiffening his spine, refusing to speak to anyone . . . why, he didn't even introduce himself to his nephews.

He wanted nothing to do with the people or the things in that village . . . Not that she didn't understand that to a degree. He did have very keen senses. What was loud to her was probably deafening to him, and all the different odors from the food booths, and the incense from the temple, and the perfumes and spices they sold in the market . . . Just thinking about them was a bit overwhelming to her, and she wasn't the one with the canine nose.

She didn't want him to be uncomfortable, but she did want to get something to eat. She wanted to get something to eat, she wanted to talk to Kagome, she wanted to hold Tomi again, and she wanted to see if she could find Shippo. She was certain he could answer her little virginity question, and it wouldn't be nearly as embarrassing as asking InuYasha or worse . . . just having him blurt it out without any preamble: "So, Rin, you've finally started fucking my brother. Maybe now he'll take that pole out of his ass."

Rin repressed a laugh and tried to focus on the predicament at hand. She hated to admit it, but she was actually starting to like Sesshomaru's brother. He said such funny things-such honest, painful, funny things. And he always got a reaction out of Sesshomaru.

"What will you do tonight?"

She turned at the sound of Sesshomaru's voice. It was odd how quickly she was becoming accustomed to him being the first to break the silence that often settled between them. Perhaps it was just part of the courtship ritual. Maybe the male was required to initiate conversation with the female. Maybe when this was all over, they'd go back to the way things used to be-her chatting on incessantly and him pretending to pay attention, or her too unsure to say anything and him too above saying anything.

No, she didn't want to go back to either one of those ways. She didn't want to lose what they seemed to be building.

"Rin?"

"I'm not sure," she finally said. There were plenty of things she wanted to do tonight, but with Sesshomaru here . . . She was certain he didn't want to run all over the village, and she definitely wouldn't go looking for Shippo with him around.

Dammit. Of all the nights for him to want to come along . . .

"I don't wanna stay too long," she said. "Especially since we're going to start traveling in the morning. I don't wanna be too tired."

"This will be the last night we are near this village. Possibly the last time you'll step foot in any human village."

Well, that wasn't a big deal, she shrugged. She never enjoyed her stays in human villages, anyway. They always looked at her funny, or treated her badly, or made her feel completely out of place . . . But why was that? She was human, after all.

"That's no major loss to me."

He glanced down at her. "No, I suppose not."

"I do want to get something to eat, though. And . . . maybe see InuYasha and Kagome again? And Kin and Tomi?"

"I am merely your escort tonight. You may go where you please."

"Really?"

He gave a slight nod.

Rin smiled.

"However, I do suggest that you purchase a suitable scabbard for Master Li's sword. It should hang from your hip, not be strapped to your thigh."

"I know but . . ."

He silenced her with a gaze. "It is an impractical place to keep your primary weapon. If attacked, you'll have little chance to draw your blade from such an odd location."

"I suppose," she admitted, grudgingly.

"You'd be dead before your hand even reached the hilt."

She shook her head and fought back the urge to roll her eyes. "Why are you so obsessed with me dying?" she laughed. "I had to listen to you for four hours this morning, and now you're saying it again."

He didn't reply.

"Sesshomaru?"

"It is not an obsession," he replied quietly. "It is a fear."

Rin swallowed hard. She'd done it again, hadn't she? He was being serious, and she was just trying to tease.

"I believe we had this discussion before."

"That creature . . . came that close . . . to taking away the one thing that . . . matters most to me in this life, Rin." He drew in a deep breath and pushed it out. "I was frightened. And I didn't like it ."

"We did," she nodded. "I'm sorry. I'll . . . I'll get a scabbard as soon as we hit the marketplace."

He nodded his agreement.

"Sometimes I don't think before I speak," she said, somewhat abashed.

He raised an eyebrow at her, seemingly amused. "You think I am unaware of this?"

She chuckled lightly, shaking her head. "You're going to pay for that one."

He seemed utterly unaffected by her feeble threats.

"I was just going to stay for a few minutes, but since you seem to have so much to say lately, I'm going to make you socialize."

He remained unimpressed.

"We'll sit down and visit with your brother and his mate. You can hold Kin, and I'll hold Tomi. I think it's only right you get acquainted with the newest members of your family, after all. And you and InuYasha can catch up some more, and I can ask Kagome if she can rig up one of those subduing necklaces for me."

Sesshomaru scoffed.

"What?" she laughed. "Think you're too good to be subdued?"

"Such weak magic would have no effect on me," he said flatly.

"But it would be fun to try," she said. "For me, at least."

"I would no sooner submit to being subdued than I would allow myself to be castrated."

Rin laughed. "That would be a terrible thing. Especially since you promised me children."

"Pups," he corrected her. "Our children will be hanyou pups."

"Does that bother you?" she asked. "Having a half-demon for an heir?"

"Strong parents make strong pups," he said simply. "What do I have to be concerned about?"

She smiled to herself. He'd just complimented her. After years upon years of listening to Jakken say how stupid, weak and feeble humans were, her lord had just called her "strong."

As soon as they stepped foot in the village, InuYasha made his presence known. "Well, well, well, look what I've found here." He dropped down from a treetop in front of them. "To what do we owe this pleasure?" he asked, nodding his head towards Sesshomaru.

His brother declined to respond.

"Well, it's the last day we're going to be here," Rin said. "I wanted to come and soak in the sights one last time, and he wanted to come with me."

"Oh?" he took a few steps closer to them. "And why . . ." He looked from his brother to Rin and back again. "Never mind," he snorted. "I know why, now."

Sesshomaru glared.

"So," Rin said quickly. "What are you doing out here? Why aren't you with Kagome and the others at the festival?"

"Guard duty," he said simply.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at him.

"Some of the villagers claimed to have seen some demons lurking by the riverside this morning."

Rin laughed. "That was probably just Ah-Un and Jakken."

"I thought as much," the hanyou scoffed. "But, better safe than sorry. You know how jumpy humans are."

Rin nodded, even though she wasn't sure if she should agree with him or be insulted.

"So, shove off, you two lovebirds. I've got a job to do."

Rin smiled and waved as he jumped back into the treetops.

Sesshomaru scowled.

Yep, Rin laughed. InuYasha could always get a rise out of his brother.

The remainder of the night was uneventful. They went to the marketplace and found a suitable scabbard for her sword. They stopped at a food booth, and she bought some shrimp fried rice. They ran into Kagome and Miroku's wife along with their children, Kin, Tomi and Sachiko near the village square. Rin visited with them for a few moments, cradling Tomi, patting Kin's head, and complimenting Sachiko on her braids. Kagome even let her touch her stomach, so she could feel the new baby kick.

While the three women were distracted, Kin wandered off to where Sesshomaru stood a few feet away. The toddler gave him an exaggerated sniff, then pulled on his white hakama and extended his arms upwards. Sesshomaru glanced down at his brother's pup with mock indignation. Whatever the child was thinking, he was determined not to let him have his way.

Rin laughed. "He wants you to hold him, Sesshomaru."

Kagome and the demon slayer turned their attention from Rin to him with open curiosity.

"He can tell you're related," Kagome said. "It's okay. You can pick him up."

Sesshomaru scoffed. As if he needed her permission to touch one of his own blood. If he wanted to hold his nephew, he would. If he didn't, he wouldn't.

The pup continued to stare expectantly up at him, his short, little arms still extended.

"Go ahead," Rin urged. "Pick him up. How can you say 'no' to something that cute?"

They were laughing at him, all three of them-the slayer, his brother's wench and his own mate. Cute, indeed.

The pup again tugged on his pants' leg. "Up."

Sesshomaru gave a slight sniff. Not only had his nephew inherited the golden eyes and silver hair typical of inu youkai, his blood quite closely resembled that of his great father, Toga. Of course, there was some human taint, but Sesshomaru supposed with the proper training and supervision he could become as powerful as InuYasha and himself, which meant his pups-being half demon, as opposed to quarter demon-had the potential to surpass both him and InuYasha in greatness.

Intriguing . . . He crouched down and scooped the pup up with his good arm, taking the opportunity to study him more closely.

"I don't believe he actually picked him up," Sango whispered.

"Me either," Kagome agreed. "I expected him to turn up his nose and walk away."

"Well, I think it's sweet," Rin said. "My lord is just full of surprises."

"That he is," Sango agreed. "Who'd think his royal pain in the highness would actually have a way with kids?"

"I guess it's good he's getting in a little practice, now, though. I remember when the boys were first born, InuYasha was a complete wreck. He wouldn't let anyone anywhere near us for three days. As soon as Kaede helped me deliver, he kicked her out, and wouldn't let anyone else in."

"It is instinctive," Sesshomaru said simply.

The two women seemed surprised he'd been paying attention. Rin did not.

"The first three days of an inu youkai's life are its most impressionable. If the pup does not bond with its parents then, it never will. Too many different sights and smells will confuse it."

The slayer's and the wench's jaws dropped.

"He talks a little more, now," Rin said. "When necessary."

Sesshomaru scoffed and deposited his nephew back on the ground. "What kind of parent is unaware of this simple fact of life?" He approached the huddled group of women and children, Kin following closely behind.

Kagome scowled at the implied insult.

"Though considering the father, this Sesshomaru can hardly fault you for your ignorance. I wish to examine the other one, now. Tomi, is it?"

Sango raised an eyebrow. "Examine?"

The women continued to chatter on while Rin watched him and his nephews out of the corner of her eye. Tomi looked very much like Kin, but he had more of his mother's blood in him than demon blood. So, while his features were definitely those of a demon, it was doubtful that he'd grow to be much stronger than a human.

Pity, he idly thought as he caught scent of his mate's tears.

"Kohaku? Dead? Really?"

Apparently, she'd asked after the slayer's brother, Naraku's former minion. He'd revived him with Tenseiga during the final battle. Naraku had struck him dead, and he'd revived him, so they would have more bodies going after the murderous hanyou. The more bodies, the more distractions, and the better his chance at bringing him down. He wasn't one for . . . teamwork. But he wasn't one for losing either.

How many times did that bastard dare come after his Rin? Try to manipulate him? Use him?

When they all had him cornered that rainy day many years ago, he decided then and there that the hanyou would not go free, despite any cost to him. If it took all of them to defeat him, so be it. Kohaku was simply part of the bigger plan. He didn't do it to be "merciful." He didn't do it as a favor. He did it to bring Naraku down . . . And it had worked.

"How?" Rin asked. "When?"

"Six years ago," the slayer said. "He finally got all his memories back and . . . he just couldn't take it. He . . . took his own life."

"That's awful," Rin wiped a few errant tears away. "I'm so sorry. I didn't even know he had a sister. I just assumed because you were all there, you could tell me what happened to him."

Awful, Sesshomaru scoffed inwardly. That wasn't "awful;" that was weakness. He'd given the boy a second lease on life, and he'd thrown it away. Not that he cared. His life was no concern of his, after all . . . Except, possibly, for the fact that Rin seemed to be so fond of him.

"I'm so sorry," Rin repeated. "It must have been a great loss to you. I know what it's like to lose a family member . . . or three," she added weakly.

"I think we all know," Kagome said softly.

He could've been mistaken, but he was almost certain the wench's words were meant for him, too. But after tiring of the slayer and his brother's wench, they headed back to their campsite. Rin bid them farewell and offered her condolences to the slayer for her long-since dead brother, and he returned his nephew to his mother.

"Leaving so soon?"

Rin cast her eyes skyward. Sesshomaru waited until his brother dropped down to ground level.

InuYasha landed with a thump, then gave the two a knowing grin.

"We did what we set out to do," Rin said. "Except I didn't get to say goodbye to Shippo."

InuYasha smirked. "I think he's got his hands full at the moment. I just saw him go that way with one of the headman's sisters."

Rin visibly paled. "Takeda's sister?"

The hanyou nodded. "One of them," he said. "But don't worry. No one's seen Takeda since Lord Fluffy gave him a piece of his mind."

"Lord Fluffy?" Rin repeated.

Sesshomaru scowled. InuYasha grinned. "Yeah, Rin. Don't you think the name suits him?" His hand made a quick pass over the fur of Sesshomaru's boa.

Before Rin could say a word, and before his half-breed brother could take a much needed step backwards, Sesshomaru pulled him into an all-too-familiar death grip, his claws wrapped around his neck, suspending his body above ground.

Rin grinned sheepishly as the two brothers glared at each other. "Nobody touches the boa without permission."

InuYasha forced a smile. "Lost our sense of humor, have we, Sesshomaru?"

He tightened his grip on brother's neck, letting a little of his poison leak down. "Not at all," he said easily. "I find this quite amusing."

"Gods!" InuYasha cursed. "I thought you would've loosened up a little since you're getting some, now." He tried to pry his fingers from around his neck. "Rin must not be doing it right."

His eyes flashed red for a brief moment, then he sent InuYasha crashing through the wall of his own hut. He then turned to leave, completely ignoring the grunts and curses of his brother. "Come, Rin."

She shot InuYasha a sad smile over her shoulder and shook her head. "And just when I was starting to like you, too." She walked off and joined her lord.

InuYasha forced himself to his feet. "Can't anyone take a joke!" He brushed the dust and splinters from his clothing, then took a moment to survey the damage. "Gods, Kagome's gonna kill me when she sees this."

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Author's Note: That's it for chapter 20. And for those of you wondering, yes, Takeda will be making another appearance . . . And it won't be pretty for any of the parties concerned.

Fanfiction.net reviewers: You guys still rock! You are the absolute best!

Adultfanfiction.net reviewers: You guys rock, as well. I'd say I get the most original and insightful reviews from you guys.

Mediaminer reviewers: You were there in the beginning, but where are you, now? Love it or loathe it, I'd really like to know what you think. Should I even continue posting my fic here?

Anyway, for those of you who do read and review, much thanks :D It makes all my sleepless nights worthwhile ^ ^

Thanks for reading and reviewing, and I hope I didn't disappoint,

theMaven :)