InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru's Dream (or should we say Nightmare!) ❯ Inuyasha vs Sesshoumaru: Battle of the Brothers ( Chapter 1 )

A/N- This fic is a joint with my funny and most anime obsessed friend Leala. Beware readers this may contain some ahem "interesting facts…or point of views on the veterinarian." There is going to be sexual content (in future chapters) and profanity, but I promise this is FUNNY!!!!!!!! Oh and if you might wonder where Leala and I got this idea, well lets just say…we were inspired at lunch break in school. And on a last note, I don't own Inuyasha and gang. Thanks and enjoy!

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru's Dream (Or should we say Nightmare!)

Chapter 1

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

***At Kaede's New Sengoku Jidai Pub

Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru and gang were all sitting around in Kaede's Pub.

"Let's celebrate everyone on the death of Naraku!!!!!!!" Kaede shouted while standing on the bar counter. She had a one too many drinks. To the horror of everyone, she started to pole dance.

Miroku looked on at the horrible sight before him, instead of slipping any money into her thong he merely shuddered. "Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!"

Sango looked over at him with a smug grin, "I see the accomplished pervert has finally met his match." She threw him another smug grin as she went off to find Kirara.

Outside Kikyo and Kouga were picking a fight with the bouncer.

"What do you mean you can't let me in???" Kikyo yelled at the muscular man.

"I'm very sorry lady but according to this your dead, and unless I have a valid registration that your alive I can't let you in." Tall, dark, and bald said to her.

"What do you mean I'm standing right here, don't I seem lively enough to you??"

"I'm very sorry ma'am but I need valid ID." He said as he shoved her out into the street.

"Go to hell you muscle bound oaf!! I don't need this I can find my own action out here on the street!" With a huff Kikyo went off to a hookers corner.

Kouga looked up and up and up at the man. "Ummmmm… umm…um, I need to see my err woman."

The man looked down at Kouga, "You got ID kid?"

Kouga's eyes widened dramatically, "KID!!! KID!!!! Do you know who you're talking to? I'm am the great Kouga! Chief of the wolf youkai clan, and I am not a kid."

The bouncer looked down at him. "Got ID?"

Kouga stood there stunned. "Of… of course, let me find it." Kouga looked franticly in his fur. "I must have left it in my other tail." After more frantic searching he came up with a drivers license. "Here will this do?"

The bouncer took the license. He arched his eyebrow at the picture, and then looked down at Kouga. "Are you sure this is you?"

Kouga nodded looking smug, "Of course it is who else is that handsome?"

"Are you absolutely sure? Cause this doesn't look like you." He shoved the card in Kouga's face.

Kouga looked up and his mouth dropped open, staring back at him was not his own handsome face but that of the old geezer Totousai with his finger up his nose. "How… how bout that! Guess it isn't me after all."

The bouncer looked down at him. "Guess not." He then grabbed Kouga and threw him out on the street with Kikyo, who thought he was her first customer and began dragging him to a cheesy motel.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!" was the last thing Kouga shouted before Kikyo shoved her tongue down his throat in a steamy French kiss.

Meanwhile, music, drinks, and laughter filled the pub.

"Well my brother, it has finally ended. Let's celebrate by getting you a drink." Inuyasha looked up at Sesshoumaru warily.

"What are you doing here?'

Sesshoumaru grinned and held something up to him. "Well-Rin-gave-me-these- nice-mushrooms-and-they-looked-like-really-good-mushrooms-so-I-ate-the- really-good-mushrooms-so-I-ate-them-did-you-know-mushrooms-grow-in-the- forest-I-like-mushrooms-don't-you-think-that-mushroom-is-a-weird-name-there - is-no-mush-or-a-room-so-where'd-they-get-the-name-do-you-know-Natasha?"

Inuyasha looked at Sesshoumaru in horror. "What the Fuck!" Then he realized what Sesshoumaru had called him. "My name is not Natasha you asshole!!!!" he growled out at him.

Sesshoumaru smiled at him again. "It's not Natasha? Oh I'm sorry Inashata."

"It's Inuyasha!!" he growled.

"Inyuwasha?"

"NO you bastard it's Inuyasha!"

"Ohhhhh Inuyasha….do I know you from somewhere?"

"Arghhhhhhhh!!!!"

"I like fluffy things." Sesshoumaru giggled as he played with his tail.

"You… you… you BAKA!!!" Inuyasha was abruptly silenced as Sesshoumaru shoved a drink down his throat.

"How does that taste?" Sesshoumaru said as he grabbed another.

"It…it tastes like burning… I WANT MORE!!!"

Sesshoumaru looked at Inuyasha in an odd way. "It tasted like cotton candy to me. Ummmmmmm…" his eyes glazed over a little more. "I like cotton candy! Big fluffy mounds of sugary goodness…" He then smiled evilly, "Lets see who can drink the most, the one who passes out first has to kiss Kaede and tip her.

Inuyasha shuddered and looked around. Miroku was drooling and looking at all the prostitute women that were hanging around outside the pub. Sango saw this and whacked him over the head with her boomerang. Obviously pissed off, Sango went with Kagome and started to dance with some guys just to make Miroku jealous. It worked, but Sango felt bad and started to flirt with Miroku. Kirara was in another corner and seemed to be sniffing something. Her eyes were glazed over like Sesshoumaru's. Shippo, Myoga, Rin, and Jaken were spinning a bottle in a corner. From the looks of the round it was Rin's turn and the bottle had dictated that she kiss Jaken. Instead of obeying the rules of the game, Rin broke the bottle over Jaken's head, rendering him unconscious, and began to make out with Shippo instead.

~ She must have been hanging around with Sango.~ Inuyasha thought. He then turned to Sesshoumaru. "Deal!" He looked down as Sesshoumaru shoved another glass into his hand.

"Here. It's vodka." He said with a wide grin on his face.

Inuyasha wouldn't let his brother beat him at something simple like drinking! On the count of three Inuyasha chugged it.

***5 minutes later….

90! …91! … 92! … 93! …94! …95! … 96! …97! …98! …99!!!!!!

"One more and that makes 100! But your not going to win." Sesshoumaru said as he looked at the drunken Inuyasha. He himself was also drunk and quite stoned.

" I'm going to drink it…" Inuyasha said as they both lifted their glasses and went to take their last drink.

*THUD*

Both Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru hit the bar table unconscious.



*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A/N- If your wondering about Natasha, well…. Lets just say it's what the spell check told us on Microsoft for Inuyasha. "Kaede's New Feudal Age Pub"? How can a pub be feudal age but new? I don't know…it just sounded good. In the next chapter it's the start of Fluffy's and Inuyasha's Nightmare. Now, if you don't "appreciate" this kind of humor, well you can either go to hell…orrrrrr…go take a visit to Kikyo and Kouga. :) heehee Have a nice day! R/R.