InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kagome's Heart and Inuyasha's Feelings ❯ Chapter 6- Kagome's Decision ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

The young woman awoke to the subtle sounds of the crickets chirping their early morning song just outside of the hut. Kagome grimaced as she felt the pain in her leg, but it was nowhere near as bad as it had been. How long had they been here? It took the miko a moment to gather her barings when she realized she was snuggled into something warm and soft. She forced open her dark orbs and met the deep red hue that rested next to her. Pulling herself together and doing her best to awaken, the miko realized she had been pulled into Inuyasha's tender hold. She gazed up at his face, letting her eyes travel up to his hair and back down again. It was still black. He's still in human form...Thank goodness he's still alive...I was so worried. I wonder if he's been sleeping okay?

As she became somewhat aware, Kagome realized her clothing was not that of her school uniform like usual, it was heavier. She stared down at the red hakama around her waist, covering her legs and white kimono top she wore around her shoulders and bosom; the traditional priestess clothing. Somebody must have removed her dirty, torn, blood-ridden clothing and dressed her in this so she would be more comfortable. They must have wanted her to stay more warm sometime in the night. The miko closed her eyes trying to recall if anybody had done that for her. She remembered somebody had woken her up and Kagome could just vaguely recall what had happened.

~*~*~*~*~
"Kagome, you're shivering to death. Why don't you let me put something on you that might be more warmer and comfortable?" Kaede suggested to the young miko. Kagome forced open her eyes and discovered that she was shivering something terrible. Goosebumps had covered her flesh and the poor miko felt as though she were freezing to death.. Even the fire wasn't warming her. Her school uniform had been shredded, torn in some places and just wasn't keeping her warm, despite the blanket that had been placed over her and Inuyasha.

"T-that would be g-great, K-Kaede," Kagome replied through chattering teeth. Even talking was difficult. Why did she feel so sick?

"I believe you're running a fever from the poison," the elderly miko acknowleged. "As long as we can keep you warm and comfortable, you should be okay. I'm going to have you take a little more antidote," the elderly priestess explained as she gathered some clothing for Kagome.

She knelt her body down next to Kagome's shivering one and gently lifted the girl up. Kaede helped the girl remove the school uniform, and the old miko dressed Kagome in the priestess outfit she had provided. Once the girl was dressed, Kaede laid her back down, covered her with a blanket and gave the sick priestess more antidote from the poison.

"I believe that you're body is reacting to the poison because of you being a true human. Even though Inuyasha is a human right now, the demon blood still flows within his veins, so he's not reacting so bad anymore now that he's recieved the antidote," the old miko explained. "Now, I want you to get some more rest. Those clothes should help keep you warm."

"Thank you, Kaede," Kagome murmered as she felt the sleep beginning to take her again and once more curled into the bedding she and Inuyasha shared, drifting back off to sleep.

~*~*~*~*~

Kagome smiled gratefully. The old woman had always been so kind and gentle with her. She had been since the day Kagome had arrived in the Feudal Era. The priestess gazed up at the window and realized that the sun had not yet risen. The sky was still dark, but Kagome caught a faint orange hue just at the top of the hills. Dawn would be breaking soon, but only when the sun rose would Inuyasha be turned back into the hanyou that he always was. She let her eyes avert to his chest as she watched it slowly rise and fall with every soft breath he took, giving the indication that he was indeed asleep. Her eyes wandered down to where the wound in his stomach was and saw that his fire rat had been thoroughly cleaned and his wounds dressed.

The girl wanted more than anything to reach up and touch his face tenderly with her fingertips, and she had to fight back the urge. While Kagome watched him she wondered to herself if he realized that he was holding her? As she fully came to, she realized that his arm was resting around her body as well, and the miko felt her heart start to pound. But...why is he holding me? She continued to watch him when panic struck Kagome's body. She wanted to dash out from his grasp and get away from him before he too awoke and realized that he had been holding her. The last thing Kagome wanted was for Inuyasha to get upset and angry at her or be embarrassed in front of their friends. Maybe he thought he was holding Kikyou and not her so that's why he was holding her? Or maybe he just didn't realize that he was even holding Kagome. Instead of leaping out and away from his hold, Kagome gently moved the sleeping hanyou's arm and slid out quietly from underneath.

She crawled backwards away, anxiously staring at him as though he'd wake up at any given moment, but the hanyou was snoring softly. She sat perched on her knees and brought her knuckles to her mouth. It was almost too painful to even look at him as the events from the previous afternoon struck her mind. Inuyasha had been knelt down in front of Kikyou. The two were so close that if he wanted, he could have reached over and kissed the undead miko if he wanted. With that very thought, Kagome felt the tears beginning to burn her eyes. Maybe he did before I got there and that's why he was so close to her? This...this is too much. I've got to get out of here before I start crying...

Kagome stood and realized how weak and shakey her legs felt. The priestess grabbed ahold of the wall composing herself, not wanting to awaken any of her sleeping companions around her, especially Inuyasha. Kagome's eyes scanned the room as she saw Shippou and Kirara curled up together, asleep in a small bedding in the corner of the hut. Sango and Miroku had fallen asleep sitting up side by side. The demon slayer's head rested on the monk's shoulder, and Miroku had taken the liberty to pull a blanket up around the two. They were both in deep sleep and Kagome smiled at her two friends. If only the houshi would behave himself like this all the time and not acted like a pervert, Sango might not always take the opportunity to bash him over the head with her Hiraikotsu.

The priestess had to stifle a small snigger at the thought of Sango's weapon giving the houshi a nice-sized lump, but then she remembered Inuyasha as she watched the two sleeping. The pain in her heart grew and it lurched into her throat, causing a lump the size of a golfball. She had to get out of there before she risked waking her friends. Kagome tiptoed around the slumbering pair and with one last gaze at Inuyasha's handsome human form, the young priestess slipped past the bamboo curtain and outside. She realized that her shoes and socks had been removed from as her bare feet met the grass, damp and cool from the early morning dew. Kagome walked through the grass a soft wind rustled through the trees, blowing her long, raven waves and the long sleeves of her white haori out from behind her. She gazed upward at the sky as she noticed it become a little lighter by the moment.

Going for a walk to clear her head would was the best thing for her, the miko figured. Kagome was beginning to feel smothered by her emotions being in the hut with Inuyasha, and what hurt even more was the fact that he had been holding her so close and so gently. Even with her wearing this clothing she felt it only made matters worse. Inuyasha had probably thought she was Kikyou. She had a striking resemblence to the undead priestess and it was even more striking when Kagome wore their formal clothing that marked the sign of a priestess. The girl sighed as she gazed up and saw the scared Goshinboku tree that Inuyasha had been pinned to. This was the place where the two first met and their destinies had changed forever. Kagome approached the old wood and placed a hand over the bare patch where Inuyasha's body had once rested against. She ran her fingertips gently down the wood and sighed.

Sometimes I just...I just wish we'd never have met. If I had known it was going to hurt this much...if I had known that I was going to fall in love with you, I never would have stayed. Kagome released her hand from the tree, swallowing hard to fight back the tears creeping up on the corners of her eyes again. She couldn't keep doing this to herself. The pain was almost too much to endure. As the priestess turned, the wind blew her hair gently across her face, loosening soft strands to rest against her cheeks.

The little miko stared at the wooden opening that protruded from the ground just ahead of her as she walked, it's oak appendages surrounded by green, leafy vines creeping up the sides...the Bone Eater's Well. This was Kagome's link between this world and her own, modern day Japan. The miko crossed the grass which had now soaked the bottom of her pant legs from the dewdrops, but Kagome didn't care. She seated herself on the edge of the well and stared up at the sky.

I know if I go home, Inuyasha will probably come after me and wonder why I left? Right now would be the perfect time to leave...He's sleeping and I know he's going to survive. If he wasn't, he would have died during the night, and plus it's almost daybreak. He'll be strong again soon. I just don't know how much more my heart can take. One minute he tells me one thing and then the next he's with Kikyou...if he does come after me, I'll have to tell him I can't do it anymore...I'll have to tell him that it's hurting too much. Inuyasha, why did you promise you would protect me that night if you didn't really mean it? The miko could clearly remember what had happened the night Inuyasha had told her this.

~*~*~*~*~

Kagome had been sitting next to the river alone, gazing at the ripples while the moon and the stars reflected off of it. She was out here all alone. Just earlier had the group been engaged in a fierce battle. Kagome nearly had her jewel shards stolen, but only then when she made to reach back to her quiver and draw an arrow, the priestess realized that she was completely out of arrows. It was useless now. Inuyasha was fighting another youkai and Kagome was rendered completely helpless. Just in the nick of time she had been saved, but it wasn't by Inuyasha, it was by Miroku and Sango who had been Kirara's back. After the battle ended, Inuyasha moped around with a grumpy expression and wouldn't talk. The priestess then decided that she was most likely too much of a burden for him to continue to go on protecting and she knew why.

Only a few days previous had they had another encounter with Kikyou. She had came to give them more needed information about Naraku. During Kikyou's visit clear up until her departure, Kagome had been able to see them, standing next to one another and talking. Yet it still tore the little miko's heart apart to see them next to one another. The priestess sighed and rested her chin on her hand, wondering what she ever did to deserve the pain she felt? Why couldn't she just summon up the courage and tell Inuyasha how hard this was for her? Obviously it was because of her pride. Kagome wasn't about to let him exactly how much it tore the girl to shreds whenever he and Kikyou were together. There was a slight rustle in the bushes from behind her, breaking the miko from her thoughts. Kagome gasped softly as she looked behind her to see a red-clad hanyou coming towards her.

"What are you doing out here by yourself?" begin Inuyasha in an accusatory voice. "Don't you realize that you could get hurt or something like that being all alone at night? Shouldn't you be sleeping anyway?"

"I'm sorry, Inuyasha...I couldn't sleep," Kagome apologized. "I guess I just needed some time alone."

"Keh, why would you need time alone?" He questioned her, walking across the grass and sitting next to her. The hanyou folded his arms inside of his sleeves and tilted his head slightly looking at Kagome. "I thought you didn't like being alone?"

"I guess I just needed to do some thinking," the miko admitted, turning her head from the hanyou, a soft blush creeping up on her cheeks. "You know...about...umm, school stuff."

"Hmmm, I don't think that's it," Inuyasha acknowleged. "What's going on with you, Kagome?"

"It's nothing, alright?" Kagome told him a little more firmly. "It's already hard enough to deal with, and I don't want to talk about it, okay?"

Inuyasha stared at the girl slightly stung. She didn't want to talk to him about it? But normally Kagome always came to him if she were angry or frustrated and needed to vent, especially about Naraku. He usually always had some words of encouragement for the miko, even if they carried an insult or two, but Kagome had been used to that. So, what was so different now that she couldn't even tell him?

"What has gotten into you!" Inuyasha snapped as Kagome rose from where she was sitting and walked away from the hanyou.

"I told you I don't want to talk about it, okay!" Kagome shot back, glaring daggers at him. She had her hands balled into small fists at her sides.

The half-demon found himself nearly cowering from Kagome's icey stare. He knew that look...it usually ended in her sitting him and that's the last thing he wanted. 'Okay, I don't need to be so rash, I'll just talk to her like normal...I really don't wanna be sat again.' Inuyasha lept up from his spot on the ground and hurried up behind Kagome. The half-demon scooped a rather surprised miko in his arms and lept up into the nearest tree branch. Inuyasha sat her down gently on the branch, and sat himself next to her, turning himself towards her so he could face the miko.

"There, now you can't get away from me," Inuyasha told her arrogantly, a satisfied grin on his face. "So, just tell me what's going on with you already."

"It's just...Inuyasha, you didn't even speak to me after we fought those demons earlier," Kagome admitted, sighing in defeat. "I figured that...you always coming to rescue me from tight spots I get myself into was becoming bothersome. I guess it'd be much easier if it were Kikyou. She's a lot stronger than me anyway and-," but Kagome's words were cut off with a harsh "shhh" from Inuyasha.

The hanyou grasped the girl on her shoulders and turned her body to face him. "Would you stop speaking such nonsense!" he told her angrily. "How could you think for even one minute that I would get sick of rescuing you. I'm there ALWAYS, Kagome, to keep you safe from getting hurt."

"Sango and Miroku where the ones who saved me earlier," the miko replied in a voice barely audible, but Inuyasha's keen sense of hearing picked up her words quickly.

"Keh, don't remind me...," he spouted off in a pouty voice, folding his arms once more in his haori sleeves.

"What...what do you mean don't remind you? You'd prefer that wouldn't you, so I don't get in your way?" Kagome questioned, certain she was right.

"Keh! Are you kidding me Kagome. It irritates the hell out of me whenever Miroku or Sango or even Kirara saves you from danger. That's supposed to be MY job!" Inuyasha replied, his voice raising.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome stated incredulously, turning back to gaze at the hanyou's angry face. His golden eyes were staring down at her. He was really being truthful.

"What!" he snapped, still continuing to stare at her.

"You really mean that? I mean about saving me from danger?" the miko asked softly, trying not to smile. The last thing Kagome wanted to do was frustrate him even more.

"Keh, 'course I do," Inuyasha replied, a blush rising on his cheeks that Kagome couldn't see in the dark, but she had a feeling he was blushing judging by the hanyou's expression.

"I...I'm sorry," the miko stated, embarrassed by what she'd previously thought. "I just...figured that-," but she was cut off again by Inuyasha grasping the girl and taking her in his arms. He held one arm around her waist and the hanyou rested his clawed hand on the back of her head, bringing Kagome's cheek to lay against his shoulder. Kagome just widened her eyes in shock, not expecting him to hold her like that.

"Dammit! Would you stop talking like that!" Inuyasha remarked, cutting her off. "Listen, I'm not ever going to let anything happen to you. I will never let you fall into dangerous hands. I will never let Naraku get you or your jewel shards. Kagome, I will protect you. I will keep you safe. I promise you," Inuyasha told her, his voice softening with every word he spoke.

Kagome now felt tears building in her eyes as she buried her face into his shoulder to hide them. "I just...figured you didn't want me around anymore. I just thought maybe I was getting to be in the way of the constant battles, always getting myself in sticky situations..."

"No, Kagome. You don't get in my way. You're the one who makes me stronger when we fight. Your scent, your presence puts me at ease, you know this. I am much more powerful in battle when you're there with me. I need you with me. I need you to stay by my side, Kagome," the Inu-hanyou finally admitted to her. "Don't you understand that at all?"

Kagome finally released her tears and she further buried her face into Inuyasha's shoulder. The miko felt his hold tighten on her as the hanyou tried his best to comfort her. "Thank you, Inuyasha," was all the priestess could manage to say.

~*~*~*~*~

Kagome turned and stared down into the well, pondering on what she should do. That night Inuyasha had promised he would always be there with her played over and over again in her mind, but then a vision of Kikyou appeared, always seeming to break and get in the way what the two would start. Kagome clutched onto the corner of the well with one hand and brought another to her chest, clutching it into a shaking fist. How much longer would the miko have to endure this pain? If she just left right now, told Inuyasha she didn't want to see him anymore if he came after her, then maybe, just maybe she would have a chance to forget about him and move on with her life...

The priestess was half over the well when she stopped and turned back. I...don't know if I should go back...I don't want to but at the same time I do...I feel like I'm being pulled in two different directions. I feel like I'm being ripped apart! Inuyasha why! Kagome let her head fall as the unbidden tears brimmed her eyes now and she could no longer control them. The miko sobbed soundly into her hands as she sat on the edge of the well, not knowing whether she should leave or stay. Kagome was indecisive on what to do and so she just sat there and cried, turning the thoughts over in her head. Would she continue to stay and watch Inuyasha make empty promises to her while rushing off to see Kikyou whenever she was near or would she go back home to modern day Japan and never see Inuyasha again?

Meanwhile, back inside of the hut, the hanyou was still in his human form as he stirred awake. The pain that had filled his body from earlier had left him and he forced himself to sit up, grimacing from the soreness from the wound in his stomach. Inuyasha clenched his teeth together and held his injury with his hand, gazing downward up to see where he was. I'm...back at the village? I'm still alive? But...how? Inuyasha stared around the room and his dark gray-blue eyes fell on the rest of his comrades resting, but something was terribly wrong.

Kagome was not there. Kagome? Where in the hell is she! With a soft grunt, Inuyasha pushed himself to stand up and he walked across the hut, doing his best not to awaken the others. Damn her...she had better not gone back home and just left me here! Long, black locks fell down the hanyou's shoulders as stepped outside. Gazing at the sky, Inuyasha knew that daybreak was well under way and he'd be back to his normal form once more. The hanyou turned human figured it would be okay to go out and see if Kagome were anywhere near him. He could already start to feel his senses slowly returning, so maybe with any luck he'd be able to smell Kagome nearby. He already picked up the scent of fresh morning dew and the smell of the trees as the wind wound softly through their leaves.

Inuyasha walked slowly, still holding his sore stomach. Man I must have been really hurt during that battle...I can hardly remember a thing, except...KAGOME!!! Oh no! Kagome had gotten hurt! Oh Kami please say she didn't...say she's not... the hanyou didn't care as he lifted his feet and began picking up speed. He was going to find out if Kagome had gone back home or not. If she wasn't there then he'd wake up Sango, Miroku and the others and find out just what the hell happened to Kagome and where she was. Dammit! I hope she didn't get kidnapped...or worse...!

"Uuugh," Inuyasha grunted from the pain in his stomach where the scorpion youkai had pierced him. "Damn that's right...that bastard impaled me with his stinger...I was poisoned, but Kagome had been injured by that demon too...Kami, I hope she's alright."

Inuyasha stopped, turning his black head up towards the sky. His ears picked up a sound, a very familiar sound. That's Kagome! It has to be! Inuyasha hurried past the Goshinboku tree and up the grassy hill to the Bone Eater's Well. He stopped as the sight that fell before his eyes slammed him like a ton of bricks. It was Kagome, wearing priestess clothing and she had her face buried in her hands, sobbing her heart out. What on earth could have happened to her to make her look so broken? Inuyasha had seen Kagome cry plenty of times, but never like this and with his human emotions intact, it was tearing him apart to see her this way. Inuyasha gazed at the girl before he made his advance. Kagome...