InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kikyo's lonely journey ❯ Truth ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story are the actual work of Rumiko Takahashi. I do not own them in any way.
 
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Chapter 5: Truth
 
The moon shone brightly over the small encampment on the edge of the village, basking the two sleeping women in its tranquil light. It was a rather unique occasion to find the two sleeping soundly at the very same time, but with the events that had happened a few hours earlier, it really came as no surprise to find them in this state.
 
As sound as Kikyo's sleep may have looked like on the outside, it was another matter on the inside. Nightmare plagued her mind, dreams where she had not made it in time to save Susune. Dreams where all she could do was cry over the child's bloody remains, feeling an agony like none she had ever felt before. Finally, unable to take it anymore, she jerked awake and looked around frantically. When her eyes fell on Susune's peaceful form, she breathed a deep sigh of relief.
 
"I really must learn to control my emotions," she mused, still shaken by her dream.
 
As she brought her hand to her face, she noticed that her members were getting stiff, a sure sign that she needed to replenish her supply of souls. Casting a quick glance at the sleeping girl, she noted that she was deeply asleep and would most likely remain as such until early morning, giving her more than enough time to feed. Rising quietly, she walked a safe distance away and called upon her soul collectors.
 
As she waited for them to come, she couldn't help but think back on the fuyouheki stone she had stumbled upon. The only one she knew existed was the one Naraku had used to hide his heart, but this stone had been a lot stronger than the one she had held. So that left only one possible answer, the stone was a copy, an imitation. Someone out there was making fake fuyouheki stones... but how and to what purpose, that was a very good question.
 
"This does not bode well," she mused with a pensive frown on her face.
 
While she had those thoughts, the first of her soul collectors arrived. Absently, she reached toward it as it began its final approach. When it got close enough, it released its charge and the glowing orb was almost immediately absorbed within her body. The cycle repeated itself for a few minutes until her stiffness finally receded, telling the woman that she had had her share for now. The process being over, she allowed a few of them to wrap themselves around her as they often liked to do when their job was done. Kikyo raised her hand and petted one gently on the head. The miko liked having these long serpentine creatures around. She found their presence to be both soothing and comforting at the same time.
 
"All right now, it's time to go," she announced after a few minutes, prompting the soul collectors to disentangle themselves from her.
 
Turning around, she made to go back to camp, but she froze. Ice abruptly surrounded her heart at what she saw. Right there, standing only a few feet in front of her was Susune sporting a mask where fear mixed with betrayal on her face.
 
******
 
Not too long after Kikyo had departed, Susune began to stir in her sleep as a nightmare invaded her otherwise peaceful slumber. Garbled images of the attack on her village mixed with the more recent ones of her brush with death against the rat youkai. Everything was blurry, but the feeling of terror was so vivid that she bolted up and looked frantically around, her breath short and erratic. Recognizing the familiar layout of the camp, her brain immediately began his work of separating dream from reality, causing the near-panicked girl to calm down.
 
As her rational mind began to take over once again, the girl lay back down and looked at the moon, allowing her mind to wander. Sleep was not far away when something caught her eye. There, amidst the starry sky, something that looked like a serpent was flying, carrying with him a strange sphere of light.
 
"What are those?" she asked to no one in particular.
 
Having half-expected a reply from the miko that should have been sleeping not too far behind her, Susune was taken aback when only silence answered her question. Turning around and sweeping the campground once again, she noticed for the first time that she was completely alone.
 
"Kikyo-sama?" she called, but no one answered.
 
Looking at the sky again, she noticed that there were at least a dozen serpents now, all carrying with them a glowing white orb and all going the same way. Curiosity started peeking inside the young girl and pretty soon, she was dashing through the woods, trying to figure out where exactly those strange creatures were heading. After a short run, a strange hue ahead caused her to slow down to a careful walk. Peeking from around a tree, she looked at the source of the light and froze in both surprise and astonishment.
 
Ahead of her, Kikyo was standing amidst three or four of those long serpent things. As she looked more carefully, another creature carrying a sphere arrived in the small clearing. It made a beeline for the miko and let go of its charge which was promptly absorbed into the woman's body. This little cycle continued for a few minutes and then, for no apparent reason, it stopped. The serpents then wrapped around the miko lazily and for a time Susune actually thought that Kikyo was going to get hurt or something, but then she gently petted one of the creatures on the head, like one would do to his or her dog.
 
"She's controlling them," she realized with a certain degree of apprehension. "She's controlling these youkai. But then... if she's controlling them then... that must mean that... she's a youkai too."
 
A youkai... the woman who had saved her life, cared for her, brought her this far... that woman was a youkai. She felt as if someone had just ripped her heart apart. The sense of betrayal was so great that she stood completely petrified as the serpents dispersed. Only when Kikyo turned around did reality came crashing down on her, but it was already too late, the miko had spotted her.
 
Time itself seemed to hold its breath as the pair looked at each other. Susune with hurt and betrayal, Kikyo with the look of someone who had died and had not realized it yet. It was finally the miko who broke the spell by taking a hesitant step toward the petrified child and extending her hand. Susune reacted by scrunching back on herself in fear of what was to come.
 
This made Kikyo stop in her track and lower her arm to her side. She clenched her hand and closed her eyes in a desperate attempt to contain the agony that coursed through her. All of her fears had finally come to pass. Susune had forsaken her, just like another young girl named Sayo had all those years ago. Another small girl she had also grown fond of, another girl who had forsaken her when she had found her secret.
 
Still, her pain back then was nothing compared to the one she was currently experiencing. Why was that? Was it because she had inwardly hoped that the child would accept her? Was it because for the first time in years she had actually thought she could trust someone? She didn't know and quite frankly, she didn't care. Right now, all that mattered was the blazing agony that was swallowing her whole.
 
"I'm... sorry... Susune," she managed to whisper before turning around and walking away stiffly.
 
The child looked at the miko with wild and uncomprehending eyes. She had half-expected to be killed for her discovery and yet, the woman had done nothing. In fact, she had looked positively devastated. She couldn't understand, Kikyo was a youkai and youkai were evil. They killed, they murdered, they rampaged, they pillaged, all for the sole pleasure of doing it. So why had Kikyo not done so? Why had she spared her life?
 
Comprehension suddenly dawned on her. Could that be it? Could Kikyo actually be a good youkai. A youkai that did not kill for pleasure, that did not slaughter innocent people, that did not destroy needlessly. In short, A youkai that was shunned by her race because of her merciful behavior.
 
"Everyone pushed her away... even me," she realized while choking back a sob.
 
True, it was a rather corny explanation, but somehow, it seemed to fit with the general behavior of the miko. The air of secrecy, the distant behavior, the tears the first night, the loneliness... Everything just fit perfectly together and it made Susune's heart constrict painfully in her chest.
 
"Kikyo-sama!" she called before exploding into a run.
 
The miko had had quite a head start and her shape had already disappeared behind the trees for quite some time when Susune actually took off, but she didn't care. Right now, she had only one thing on her mind, find Kikyo... and apologize. She couldn't forgive herself for having behaved the way she had. She had thought the miko had betrayed her, but that was wrong, she had been the one to betray Kikyo. The woman had cared for her, had saved her life twice over and what did she do to thank her? She went and cowered in fear just because she was different. No wonder she had looked so devastated.
 
"Kikyo-sama!!!" she called again, louder, in hope of getting the woman's attention.
 
There was no answer however and Susune was beginning to think that she would never find the miko when she suddenly spotted her. The woman was stumbling forward almost blindly. Branches brushed against her face, but she did not even bother to try to avoid them. Her feet caught on something at just about every step she took and even this barely seemed to faze her.
 
"Kikyo-sama..." she repeated softly, while making her way hesitantly to the woman.
 
The effect of her voice was immediate. The woman abruptly whirled around, revealing what Susune had only seen once on the miko: a broken and teary face. In the space of a split second, Kikyo's features were alight with more emotions than Susune had seen displayed on the woman in two days. It all started with absolute surprise at seeing the child standing there. Then there came horror at having been caught in this state, which the miko remedied by wiping her face with her sleeve. This storm of emotions all ended when open hostility flared in Kikyo's brown eyes.
 
"What do you want Susune, haven't you had enough already?" sneered the miko.
 
Susune flinched but didn't back away. She had not expected Kikyo to welcome her with open arms, if anything she had actually thought it would be much worse than this.
 
"I'd like... to apologize Kikyo-sama. I..." she began but Kikyo did not let her finish.
 
"Apologize?" asked the miko in a dangerously low tone. "You want to apologize?!" she repeated, her voice picking up in volume.
 
"Apologize for what exactly, eh? Apologize for being overly curious? Apologize for putting your life in danger and making me worry? Apologize for spying on me? Tell me Susune, what are you apologizing for?" snarled the miko, voice filled to the brim with venom.
 
Tightening her hands into fists to keep herself from trembling - Kikyo was scary when angry - Susune took a deep breath to calm herself. She had come here for a purpose and she'd rather die right now than let fear get the better of her.
 
"No," she answered in a slightly quaking voice. "It's... much worst than this Kikyo-sama. You... trusted me, cared for me and... when I discovered you weren't human I... pushed you away... and broke your heart in the process. This is... what I'm apologizing for... for betraying you," she finished, her voice dying in an almost inaudible whisper.
 
There was a long minute of silence following Susune's words. Kikyo was so shaken by this last admission that she simply stood rooted in place, not knowing what to say or feel. Her broken heart cried out in relief, begged her to simply accept Susune's apologies, but the fear and agony she had just endured prevented her from doing so. In fact, instead of soothing her pain, it made things worse.
 
"Is that all? Is your guilty heart appeased?" she snarled viciously.
 
Even she knew that what she was saying was cruel and completely uncalled for, but at this point, she was beyond caring.
 
"By tomorrow, you'll have yourself a brand new family, a family that will love you and raise you as their own. So what good will it do to apologize to me besides making you feel better Susune?" she continued, coldly and mercilessly.
 
Kikyo had half-expected that her argument would shut the girl up for good, but it seemed that she had unknowingly touched a sensitive nerve as anger suddenly flashed in the ten year old's eyes.
 
"Whoever said that I wanted a new family!" shot back Susune equally angry now.
 
The miko was not going to have any of this foolishness however, not in her current state of mind.
 
"You ungrateful little wench!" she snapped, her voice cracking like a whip. "Do you have any idea of just how lucky you are? There are some who would die for the opportunity I've given you!"
 
"I don't care what others would do or think! This is not what my heart is telling me to do!" yelled Susune at the top of her voice.
 
"Then what is it telling you to do?!" asked Kikyo, screaming too, unable to take it anymore.
 
"It's telling me to stay with you!" answered the child.
 
Silence fell on the pair like an anvil falling on a floor. Kikyo visibly deflated at hearing the girl's last retort. Her astonished features told her just how much Susune's words had struck home. Like a phoenix rising from its ashes, hope began to glow anew inside her, hope that one person in this world might just accept her as she was, might treat her as a human being, not a clay puppet. But fear once again reared its ugly head, shadowing the light that had just started to flicker.
 
"You cannot stay with me Susune," whispered Kikyo, her voice quiet and broken. "No matter how much you want it, it's impossible."
 
"But why?" questioned the girl in a wailing tone.
 
"The youkai I killed earlier had something with him that he shouldn't have had. I intend to get to the bottom of this... so coming with me will inevitably put you in danger. That is... unacceptable," answered the miko.
 
But that wasn't the whole truth. In fact, it sounded more like an excuse to flee from reality. What really scared Kikyo was the deep effect Susune had on her. This ten year old little girl was melting her defenses one after the other. She felt so alive, so... human in Susune's presence that it was scary. She couldn't allow those feelings to take a grip on her because it would lead her to nothing but pain in the end. That was why she was trying her hardest to make the child stay in this village. Unfortunately, Susune had other ideas.
 
"Then I'll learn to defend myself. I'll learn to shoot arrows like yours that disintegrate youkai! I'll learn I swear I will," exclaimed the child.
 
Huffing in annoyance, Kikyo resorted to show the girl how little she knew instead of simply telling her. "Close your eyes Susune... and concentrate as hard as you can," she ordered.
 
Confusion danced for a moment in the girl's eyes, but she did as she was told. She did not really know what she was supposed to do so she simply emptied her head and focused on her surroundings. She waited long seconds like this, waiting for something, anything that might be out of the ordinary until Kikyo's voice broke the silence.
 
"Well? Do you feel anything?" she asked, voice cold, almost daring.
 
Susune frowned in concentration before opening her eyes and shaking her head. "No Kikyo-sama, I don't feel anything peculiar. The only thing really peculiar is your pink cloud," answered the girl while bowing her head.
 
"Of course you don't... " began the miko, but the words died in her throat. "... Pink cloud?" she questioned in confusion.
 
Now it was Susune's turn to look startled. "Yes, your pink cloud," repeated the child, visibly not understanding Kikyo's confusion.
 
"What pink cloud?" asked the miko.
 
"The one that's constantly enveloping you. Don't you see it?" answered the girl, more and more confused.
 
"A pink cloud around me?" she reflected while looking at her hand rather dubiously.
 
"Have you ever seen this sort of thing on anyone else?" inquired the miko, trying to figure out what Susune was talking about.
 
"Well... just about everyone I see has one. But they're usually yellow or blue, sometimes red, but it's the first time I've actually seen a pink one," replied Susune.
 
Kikyo's eyebrows suddenly shot up as she understood what this innocent child was talking about.
 
"A sensor!" she thought in pure astonishment. "This girl is actually a sensor!"
 
She couldn't believe it. People with strong spiritual powers were few in numbers, but sensors, people that could see auras around people, were beyond rare. The records of the temple where she had trained only recorded one person in its four hundred year history who had ever developed that gift.
 
"How long have you been able to see those clouds?" inquired the miko with a frown.
 
"For as long as I can remember," replied the girl.
 
"And... " she trailed off as something suddenly clicked in her head. "Tell me Susune, was anyone else in your village able to see them?" she pressed on.
 
"Well... everyone," she answered. "Why do you ask Kikyo-sama, isn't this normal?" shot back the child, concern starting to appear in her voice.
 
"Susune, it's really important that you answer me truthfully. Do you remember seeing what color was the cloud around the youkai I killed earlier?" questioned the miko, her tone suddenly very intent and serious.
 
The girl opened her mouth but then closed it, an astonished expression appearing on her features. "I... didn't see any," she admitted, visibly surprised by the realization.
 
The gears started spinning wildly in Kikyo's head as she finally understood the reason behind the attack on Susune's village. Dozens of sensors. Dozens of people capable of seeing auras. Dozens of people capable of detecting someone carrying a fuyouheki stone. Dozens of people who were a potential danger to someone's plan.
 
But something was still amiss. If that youkai had a fuyouheki stone in his possession when he had gone to the village, then he would have been detected immediately. So it meant that he did not have it back then but... when?
 
"I suppose you must be wondering when the fuyouheki stone fell into the rat's grasp," cut in a voice coming from behind them.
 
Kikyo whirled around in time to see a form emerge from the trees. The figure was a humanoid shaped youkai wearing a richly ornate blue kimono. His human disguise was so well-made that it was hard to guess what race he actually belonged to. Kikyo thought however that his eyes looked distinctively like those of a reptile of some sort.
 
"Who are you?" questioned the miko while moving protectively in front of Susune.
 
"As you so kindly said not too long ago: 'not someone you want to mess with'," he answered, his mouth curving upward in amusement.
 
Kikyo frowned and tensed ever so slightly at this. This youkai was definitely no pushover. It was obvious he had watched them, studied them before making his move. The big question now was: How much did he know?
 
"If he did not figure this out already, then maybe we stand a chance," reflected the miko grimly.
 
"I don't suppose you've come here to humor us, so I strongly suggest that you get to the point before I lose my patience," she shot angrily.
 
"Don't insult me miko, you already know what I want, so I suggest that you give it to me before I too lose my patience," hissed the youkai, his eyes flashing to emphasize his point.
 
"If you want Susune then you're going to have to kill me first," she shot back and she made to notch an arrow on her bow.
 
Before the gesture was even half-complete, an arrow hit her square in the arm, freezing her motion. She looked at it, as if not quite comprehending how it had got here before gritting her teeth and grabbing an arrow from her quiver. She had not even drawn it out when a second arrow hit her, in the back this time. Kikyo jerked forward, but did not stop her movement. Another arrow, in the belly this time made her jerk backward, but she took aim anyway. It took another one in the leg to make her loose her balance and drop to her knees, her own arrow falling to the ground beside her.
 
She was dimly aware of Susune's strangled sobs emanating from behind her. She had heard every gasp of horror the child had emitted when an arrow had hit home, but she couldn't afford to look at her now. She had to stay focused on the youkai in front of her.
 
"You... will not... get her," she wheezed, visibly in a lot of pain.
 
She then motioned to grab her arrow and notch it back, but she was not fast enough. From the woods behind her, another arrow was fired and this time, it hit her straight in the heart. Kikyo let out a strangled gurgling sound of pain. She remained as she was for a second or two, mouth hanging open and eyes wide with surprise before she collapsed on the ground where she remained motionless.
 
Behind her, Susune looked on wide-eyed at the crumpled form of the miko, not daring to believe what had just happened. But, as the seconds passed and the woman did not stir from her position, the horrible reality caught up to her. A terrible scream escaped her lips then. An anguished scream of agony that reverberated through the clearing and echoed in the quiet night.
 
"KIKYO-SAMAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"