InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kikyo's lonely journey ❯ The false monk ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story are the actual work of Rumiko Takahashi. I do not own them in any way.

 

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Chapter 4: The false monk

 

"Wake up Susune, we still have some ground to cover today," said Kikyo to rouse the child out of her sleeping state.

 

Susune stirred and opened her eyes. Her whole body was stiff from last day's travel and she couldn't suppress a groan when she started working her tired members.

 

"But the sun isn't even up yet," she protested groggily.

 

"It will be by the time you finish breakfast," admonished Kikyo.

 

Grumpily, Susune started to extract herself from her blanket and proceeded to stretch, making her joints pop satisfyingly. Her body, thus freed from her shielding was then exposed to the morning air and the girl was able to experience first hand just how crisp it was. Hugging herself to stop her shivering, she was able to take in the clearing for the first time. A light fog was enveloping everything, blurring the details and giving the scenery a ghostly quality only reinforced by the gray predawn light. Everything was completely silent, not a thing moved in the trees. It was as if she and Kikyo were the only two people alive in the world.

 

"This is so...," she thought in awe, unable to find a proper word to describe the sight.

 

"The time when the night is not completely gone and the day has not begun yet. The moment where the world is not asleep but not fully awake. It is always an inspiring moment," commented Kikyo softly.

 

Susune jerked her head toward the miko, only to meet completely impassive features. She blinked once in surprise before shaking herself off. Had she really heard that last retort? It had been Kikyo's voice, but that expression made her doubt her ears somewhat. Eventually, she just gave up on this question altogether. She already had a drawer full of mysteries, so one more was definitively not going to make much of a difference now.

 

"What is for breakfast?" she finally resorted to ask.

 

"Same as yesterday," came the flat reply, making the child sigh in discouragement.

 

Kikyo frowned at the reaction. "This isn't a sushi shop, you eat what we have in our bags. If you're not happy with this, you can make your own breakfast!" snapped the miko sharply.

 

Susune opened her mouth, ready to protest that she hadn't actually reacted because of the menu, but because of the tone Kikyo had used but she quickly realized the futility of such an argument and promptly swallowed back her objections, choosing to help herself to a portion of the strange stew the miko had prepared instead. The taste wasn't all that great but, as Kikyo had said, on the road, one cannot afford to be picky.

 

The rest of the meal passed without any other notable incident and, before Susune knew it, they were both walking again, the rising sun warming their back. It wasn't until midday, when they met the first sign of civilization, that the girl found the will to speak again.

 

"Kikyo-sama?" she asked carefully.

 

The woman turned her head slightly to the side before returning her gaze to the road ahead. "What is it?" she asked neutrally.

 

"What will you do... after?" she inquired, being careful of her every words.

 

"After what?" replied the miko in an emotionless tone of voice.

 

"After you... find me a new family," she finished, barely managing to catch the 'dump me' that had insinuated itself in her sentence, thus explaining her slight pause.

 

"I'll keep on traveling," answered Kikyo without turning back.

 

"Okay, now's the crucial question," thought Susune, feeling her heart beat wildly in her chest.

 

"Will you consider... staying a few days," questioned the girl in a small and meek voice.

 

At this question, Kikyo jerked ever so slightly. The movement was small, almost imperceptible, but the child, having her eyes glued to the miko, saw it. She knew she had touched a nerve once again and steeled herself for the harsh reply that she knew was coming. Surprisingly, the miko did not snap back this time. She merely answered in the same tone she had used so far.

 

"No... Staying will only make my departure more painful to you," replied the miko.

 

Susune sighed in discouragement. She hadn't really expected the woman to go through with her proposition, but at this point, she was willing to try anything to postpone her deadline. And then something in the miko's words caught her ear and made her breath catch in her throat.

"More painful to me?" she reflected while goggling in surprise. This was the first time the miko had openly admitted any form of concern for her.

 

Now this was definitively news. Kikyo not only showing concern, but openly admitting it... looks like she may have affected the woman more than she actually thought. But... if Kikyo was concerned for her... did this mean that she felt the same way toward their separation? Was Kikyo also dreading the moment when they would have to part ways?

 

"Kikyo-sama... will you miss me... when you leave?" she asked sadly.

 

She knew that this would cause the miko to close up completely, but she couldn't help herself, she had to know at least this. If she failed in her task, she wanted to know if at least something of her would stay with this mysterious, kind and lonely woman that was Kikyo.

 

"... No," replied the miko after a barely discernable pause.

 

She had been right, all the doors were now closed once again, but at least she had her answer. That slight pause was all the confirmation she needed. No matter what she might say, Kikyo would not forget her. That, at least, was comforting. Now all she needed to do was find a cure for her illness in time to save her life.

 

"Please, let there be someone in the village that knows of a way to help Kikyo-sama," prayed the girl silently.

 

******

 

As everything turned out, they managed to make much better time than expected as it was still mid-afternoon by the time they actually arrived in the village. Though much bigger than Susune's, the settlement could not sport more than 200 inhabitants at most. Everyone scurried around, busy with their chores, creating a generally peaceful and friendly atmosphere. While no one looked exceedingly rich, misery was definitively not part of this community.

 

"This place is perfect," thought Kikyo, unable to stop a stab of disappointment from rising in her chest.

 

Behind her, Susune was looking left and right, desperately searching for anything that might resemble a healer of some kind. No matter where her gaze fell however, all that she could see were people going about their everyday tasks.

 

"Please, there must be someone in this village who treats the sick and injured," mused the child frustratedly.

 

Her contemplation was cut short when Kikyo stopped someone and asked directions for the headman's hut. Susune stiffened as she abruptly realized just how short her deadline really was. Her search became more and more frantic as each passing step brought them closer to their destination. She even considered bolting off just to buy herself some time, but by the time the idea formed itself in her head, it was too late, they were already ushered inside the headman's hut.

 

The man that received them was warm and friendly and introduced himself as Mikiji. He listened intently as Kikyo explained their situation and formulated her request. Much to Susune's dismay, he immediately smiled and assured them that he would do everything in his power to grant it. After that, they were both dismissed and told to come back the next day at dawn.

 

"Well, that gives me a little bit of time at least," thought the child with a small amount of relief.

 

'Little' was the keyword there, though. With barely a few hours before sunset, Susune didn't have a second to lose.

 

"Kikyo-sama, there's something that I must do. Do you think I could meet up with you later?" she asked once they were outside.

 

The miko looked at her, visibly hovering between confusion and suspicion. Finally, she shrugged in indifference.

 

"Go ahead if you want, I'll be waiting under that tree at sunset, don't be late," she admonished before heading her own way.

 

Susune nodded and bolted off at full speed. Every village had a healer, it was merely a matter of finding it. She was so intent on her search that she never saw Kikyo point discreetly at her. When she did so, a long serpentine shape partly materialized and could be seen heading in the designated direction before disappearing completely once again.

 

"Follow her and tell me if anything happens," the miko ordered mentally to her soul collector before heading away herself.

 

******

 

"Well?" asked the girl hopefully.

 

"I'm really sorry child, I've never heard of any disease with the symptoms you just described," answered the old woman.

 

"I... see," muttered Susune, disappointed.

 

This had all been wishful thinking from the very beginning. Kikyo was a miko. If she had known the cure for her own illness she wouldn't be in this situation right now! She had just been too stupid and stubborn to see the actual truth.

 

"But you know, there may be someone in this village who might know something," added the old woman.

 

Susune's head instantly jerked up, hope alive once again in her eyes. "Really? Where can I find him?" she asked urgently.

 

"A monk has arrived a few days ago and he has taken residence in the traveler's relay. He seemed quite gifted. He might know something," answered the woman.

 

"Where is it? Please tell me!" urged Susune.

 

"It's a short distance in this direction, you can't miss it," pointed the healer.

 

Barely taking time to thank the woman for the information, she jumped to her feet and bolted off. The healer looked at the running girl with a bemused expression before smiling fondly.

 

"She must really care for this woman," she whispered to no one in particular.

 

At the speed she was running, it didn't take more than a few minutes for her to cover the distance separating her from the relay. She had pushed herself so hard to get there however that, by the time she did arrive, she collapsed on her knees, panting for breath.

 

"Well, you sure seem to be in a hurry," said an amused voice, making her look up, straight in the face of the very person she had been looking for.

 

"H... Hou..." she tried to say between two labored breath, but the man interrupted her.

 

"Now, now, why don't you catch your breath and tell me what exactly is the matter," he offered while helping her to her feet.

 

Susune could only nod her answer as he sat her down on a nearby wooden bench. A few minutes later, Susune found herself looking hopefully at the frowning face of the monk after she had explained her situation.

 

"Please houshi-sama, I beg you, this woman saved my life. There has to be a way to help her," she pleaded in a desperate tone.

 

"Well, you say this, but..." trailed off the monk and then his eyebrow twitched as something Susune had said caught his attention. "You said she saved your life? How so?" he asked suddenly.

 

"Well, my village was attacked by wolf youkai a few days ago. I thought I was going to die myself, but she just popped out of nowhere and chased the wolves away," she explained.

 

"I see..." he answered in a pensive voice. "There is something I must check. Could you come back tonight? I'll know more by then."

 

"Really houshi-sama?" blurted the girl in a hopeful tone.

 

"Well, don't get your hopes up too early, as I may be mistaken. But if I'm right, I'll have the cure to your friend's condition when you come back," smiled the monk.

 

"Oh thank you houshi-sama, thankyouthankyouthankyou," she babbled incoherently, tears of relief falling down her cheeks.

"Now, now," laughed the man. "Why don't you save your thanks for when I really do have the cure? In the meantime, shouldn't you go back to your friend? I'm sure she must be getting worried about you by now."

 

Susune's eyes widened slightly and she looked at the sun which was already starting to disappear over the horizon. "Oh no, I'm gonna be late!" she exclaimed. "I have to go houshi-sama. But I'll be back tonight, I promise. Thank you again," she said almost too fast to understand before bolting off in the direction she had come from.

 

"Oh you'll thank me little girl, that I guarantee you," whispered the monk in a sinister tone, his eyes flashing red for a brief instant.

 

******

 

On the outskirts of town, sitting under a tree, Kikyo watched as Susune returned from whatever it was she had been doing. Happy was probably not strong enough a word for how the girl felt right now. She was positively glowing. Hell, one would think her parents had just come back to life.

 

"You sure seem to be in a good mood," commented the miko suspiciously.

 

"Yes, Kikyo-sama, I am," answered the child simply, but she did not offer anything more in the matter of information, instead she busied herself with setting up camp.

 

Kikyo watched her with a pensive frown on her face. Something had definitively happened, but what still remained a mystery. The only way to answer this was to ask her soul collector. In order for her to communicate with it however, she would have to dispel the barrier that made it invisible and she couldn't afford to do this while the sun was still up.

"Patience is a virtue I suppose," she mused in resignation. But deep down, she couldn't help the nagging feeling that something bad was going to happen.

 

******

 

Susune was beginning to get impatient. She was lying in her blanket, with her eyes closed, waiting for Kikyo to fall asleep. She knew that the miko would never allow her to go off on her own in the middle of the night, so she had no choice but to rely on this little trick. The only problem was that the woman was a darn insomniac!

 

"Don't tell me she doesn't sleep either," she thought in growing frustration.

 

Just as she felt she was about to explode though, she heard Kikyo stand up quietly and walk away. She waited a safe amount of time before turning around and opening her eyes. Sure enough, she was all alone. She pondered her options for a few seconds. If she went to see the monk now, Kikyo would notice her disappearance and probably scold her for leaving without permission. But with the way things were currently going, there was no way to tell just how long it would take for the woman to fall asleep.

 

"She can scold me all she wants... but I know I'm making the right choice," she thought before throwing her blanket to the side and bolting off toward the traveler's relay.

 

When she arrived she instantly spotted the monk. He was waiting for her at the exact same spot they had originally met. He saw her coming and rose from his sitting position, waving to her in welcome.

 

"I was beginning to think you wouldn't come," he greeted warmly.

 

"It was difficult to slip off unnoticed," she explained, slightly breathless.

 

"I can imagine," chuckled the monk in good humor. "But in any case you're here and it's all that matters."

 

"Did you find a cure?" asked Susune hopefully.

 

"A cure? Why yes, I did find a cure... but not for your friend's illness I'm afraid," he answered with a mysterious smile.

 

Before Susune had time to react, the monk waved his hand and abruptly, memories she didn't even know she had came back to the surface. All of a sudden, she recognized the monk in front of her. He had been there, at her village. He had been the one to recommend they trap a wolf youkai in the shed and sell its fur for money. She reeled in shock. Why on earth had she forgotten this? Why didn't she recognize him? He had been the one who caused the destruction of her village.

 

"Y... you," she stammered as her legs gave way from under her.

 

"It's funny how quick people remember me when I remove the seal on their memory," taunted the monk, his features morphing to show those of a rat youkai.

 

"You're not... human," whispered the girl in terror.

 

"Very perceptive of you," he mocked with a sadistic grin on his face. "It was so easy destroying your village. Since I looked like a monk, everyone welcomed me with open arms. And everyone was so naïve that they fell prey to my manipulations with hardly any effort at all. It was so easy that I couldn't help but seal off everyone's memory, just for the fun of watching everyone run for their life, not understanding what was happening to them."

"B... but... why?" stammered Susune as she desperately tried to scamper away from the youkai.

 

"You make me sick!" exclaimed a voice in an icy tone.

 

"Kikyo-sama!" instantly exclaimed the child, relief evident in her voice.

 

******

 

"Now then, let's see what you have to say," said Kikyo to the invisible soul collector.

 

With one gesture, the spell that made it invisible was removed and it began to tell her what it had seen. First, she smiled a little at the girl's foolishness. She still clung to the idea that a cure for her "disease" could be found. But when it got to the part of the monk however, she frowned and then horror painted her features.

 

"Come back tonight?!" she said out loud as a terrible premonition fell over her.

 

Rushing back to the camp, her fears were confirmed when she found Susune's blanket empty.

 

"Damnit! How stupid can this child get?!" she exclaimed before hastily grabbing her bow and arrows.

 

Finally, turning to her soul collector, she gave one simple order. "Show me where... hurry!" and the creature promptly took off.

 

In her entire life, Kikyo could not remember a time when she had run faster than now. The fact that Susune's life was most probably in danger was fueling her entire being with an energy that she didn't know she had. Sure, she could not get tired, but a body is a body and it does have physical limitations. Still, right now, even Inuyasha would not have been able to compete with her speed.

 

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she managed to make it on the scene, just in time to witness Susune desperately scampering away from a rat youkai. Something instantly caught her attention and she froze for a second.

 

"I cannot sense his youki," she mused in surprise.

 

The feeling didn't last however as the youkai started to advance on Susune. Anger and hatred welled up inside her as she heard him explain everything to the girl. For no other reason than his sick amusement, this sorry excuse for a youkai destroyed an entire community. More than that, he destroyed Susune's future. This was unforgivable.

 

"You make me sick!" she said, not allowing him to enjoy himself further.

 

Instantly, the youkai turned toward her, forgetting the frightened child for the moment. Surprise flashed in his eyes as he recognized the red and white uniform of a miko. But then, his red orbs narrowed as his senses caught the faint tinge of youki emanating from Kikyo.

 

"What on earth are you?" he asked in confusion.

 

"Not someone you want to mess with," shot back the woman icily, right before firing her purification arrow.

 

"Keh! You underestimate me," taunted the youkai as he raised a barrier around himself, causing the arrow to stop in mid-flight.

 

"No," answered the miko with a small smile. "You underestimate me," she finished right before the projectile broke through the obstacle.

 

Caught by surprise, the rat was unable to dodge and the arrow caught him straight in the chest. He screamed in pain as the purification powers contained within the arrow disintegrated him, leaving only his clothing behind. When everything was done, Kikyo made her way to the discarded tunic and rummaged through it. It didn't take her long to find a small glowing stone lodged in one of the pocket.

 

"Just as I thought, fuyouheki. But how on earth did he get hold of something like this?" she asked herself.

 

As she examined it more closely, the stone's glow died out and the object turned to dust in her hands.

 

"What!?" she reflected while raising an eyebrow in both surprise and confusion.

 

This train of thought didn't get very far before a whimpering sound brought it to a screeching halt. Turning her head to the side, she was instantly confronted with the teary face of Susune. Emotions immediately exploded inside of her. A part of her wanted to scream at the child for her lack of judgment while another wanted to run to her and hug her like there was no tomorrow. But there was something else that held her back, a certainty that no matter how hard she tried, she would never be anything more than a fake, a walking dead, someone that had no real place in this world. Still, no matter how strong that certainty was, her human impulses simply could not be denied this time, Susune had pushed her beyond her limits. So, in a very slow and deliberate walk, she made her way to the still trembling child and towered over her with an icy expression on her face.

 

"You..." she hissed, her whole body trembling in barely contained rage.

Finally, unable to control herself any longer, she raised her hand and slapped Susune hard across the face, almost making her fall back to the ground in the process.

 

"Don't you ever scare me like this again you hear me?!" snapped the enraged miko before abruptly whirling around and stalking away.

 

Susune watched the woman with an astonished expression on her face. Her cheek still stung from the recent blow, but she hardly felt it. Fresh tears welled up in her eyes, but they weren't tears of pain, they were tears of happiness. Kikyo had just admitted that she had been scared to death about what may have happened to her, meaning that she cared for her. She couldn't help but smile at this. She may not have been able to find a cure, but at the very least, she had alleviated a little of the loneliness that shadowed her heart and that alone was quite an accomplishment. She didn't have much time to ponder on this because at that moment, Kikyo noticed that she was not following and she turned around.

 

"Are you coming or do I have to drag you back to camp myself?" she asked sharply.

 

"I'm coming Kikyo-sama," she answered right before bounding to her feet and hurrying after the retreating woman.

 

The miko raised an eyebrow in confusion when she noticed the bright smile pasted on Susune's face. What more, the smile seemed to be directed at her. She tried to figure out what could possibly cause the child to act this way, but for the life of her, she couldn't.

 

"If she wants to be happy at being slapped, it's her business," she mused in dismissal before resuming her walk.

 

And then, as her anger died out, relief began to take its place, causing another thought to form in her head. A thought emanating from the part of her that she had locked up so long ago, a part of her that the child behind her was unknowingly freeing from its captivity, a part of her that Kikyo knew could not be allowed to exist because she was nothing more than a clay puppet: her humanity.

 

"At least... she's safe."