InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kikyo's lonely journey ❯ Lessons ( Chapter 9 )

Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story are the actual work of Rumiko Takahashi. I do not own them in any way.

 

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Chapter 8: Lessons

 

"Sister..." murmured Kaede as she watched the door with a faraway look in her eyes.

 

"Kaede?" asked Kagome when she noticed the strange expression on the old miko's face.

 

"Nothing," she answered with a shake of her head.

 

"Sister... I haven't seen you this angry since that fateful day all those decades ago. Could this mean that... your heart is finally healed?" she thought.

 

Her musing was interrupted when the door suddenly burst open to admit Sango, Miroku, Shippo and Kirara who all sported disbelieving looks on their face.

 

"Kaede-sama! We've..." began the monk, but he trailed off as Susune let out a strangled cry of terror.

 

"Susune-chan, what's wrong?" asked Kagome in concern.

 

The girl didn't answer though, she just sat there, her eyes wide and her whole body rigid with fear.

 

"Susune?" repeated the schoolgirl gently.

 

This seemed to snap the child out of her frozen stupor because she abruptly jerked her gaze away from the door to look at Kagome. Her gaze lingered on the schoolgirl for a few seconds before she hesitantly looked at the door again. She frowned a little, as if she was seeing something for the first time and then, she let out a long, shuddering sigh of relief.

 

"He has a cloud," she murmured, more to herself than for the people around.

 

It was only then that she noticed that everyone was looking at her with rather confused expressions on their faces. She felt her cheeks heat up in embarrassment as she realized how her reaction must have made her look like.

 

"I'm sorry... I thought you were someone else houshi-sama," she mumbled with a small apologizing bow.

 

"Someone else?" questioned Sango with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Yes, someone who... tried to kill me," she answered softly, unable to keep her voice from trembling slightly at the memory.

 

"It's all right, child. We will not force you to tell us what happened," cut in Kaede in a reassuring tone. "Miroku can even leave if it would make you feel better."

 

"No, I'll be fine. I was just... surprised, that's all," declined Susune with a small shake of her head.

 

"Are you sure?" questioned Sango. "It's really no big deal, we can leave if you want."

 

"No, really I'm fine," reassured the young girl. "And besides, Kikyo-sama wanted to speak to all of you so if you leave, it would only make things more complicated than they already are."

 

"Kikyo wants to... speak to us?!" repeated Sango disbelievingly. "Now that's rather surprising."

 

"Yeah," agreed Shippo. "She never cared much about us before. The only one she was interested in was Inuyasha," he blurted without thinking.

 

He regretted his words almost the moment he said them as he instantly saw Kagome's feature cloud with pain and worry. He was about to apologize when the schoolgirl shook her head slightly, a small, sad smile appearing on her face.

 

"She... changed," she mumbled quietly. "She's not the cold and calculating person she once was. She even looked... nice."

 

"Kagome-chan..." whispered Sango, not knowing what to say to soothe her friend's tormented soul.

 

Despite her nice words, the worry dancing in the schoolgirl's eyes was plain to see and it wasn't hard to figure out what was causing it. If Kikyo had managed to revert back to the kind person she once was then what would Inuyasha do? Would he change his choice? Would he ultimately choose the undead miko over her?

 

"I'll be fine Sango-chan," reassured the schoolgirl weakly.

 

The demon slayer didn't buy the lie and, truth be told, no one really did. But what could they do? The only person who could do something was Inuyasha... and only god knew how clumsy he could be about this sort of things. Chances were that once he got back, he would permanently break her heart.

 

Being ten years of age and thus not exactly versed in the matters of the heart didn't necessarily mean that Susune was blind. She could recognize pain when she saw it and, even though she didn't fully understand the situation, she was still able to figure out that Kikyo had something to do with it and that she should at least try to make her host feel better.

 

"I'm sorry if I made you worry Kagome-sama," she apologized. "But I know Kikyo-sama enough to say that she's not the type of person who would cause harm to someone else intentionally."

 

"Then you don't know her very well," answered the schoolgirl automatically and entirely without thinking.

 

Absolute silence fell on the hut at Kagome's words. No one could possibly believe that they had heard right. Kagome, the kind and generous Kagome who was always there to help others, who always encouraged people to do their best, had just... badmouthed someone. This was so unlike her that no one could think of anything to say, even Susune, who had just met the girl seemed stunned by the declaration. But it didn't last.

 

The ten years old's eyes which had been wide with surprise slowly narrowed dangerously as anger replaced her stupor.

 

"And what about you?" she asked in an icy tone. "How well do you know her?"

 

"I..." stammered the schoolgirl, feeling suddenly uncertain under Susune's wrath.

 

"I bet you think she's a cold and emotionless person who thinks only of herself! I bet you think she doesn't have a shred of good in her!" she exclaimed hotly.

 

Kagome opened her mouth to object but the girl didn't allow her to continue.

 

"If that's true then why did she save my life... twice? Why did she cry for me? Why did she worry to death about me when I almost got killed? Why did she bother to treat my injured hands? Why did she try her hardest to find me a new family when she wanted so desperately to have me stay with her? Why eh? WHY!?" she asked, her eyes accusingly sweeping over each person present.

 

"I thought so," she said when no one met her gaze. "You don't know her at all! You didn't even try to get to know her! You..." but she trailed off as the world abruptly started spinning.

 

She staggered for a few steps before her legs finally gave way and she fell to her knees. Kagome, being the closest was the first to reach the child and she placed a steadying hand on her shoulders.

 

"Susune, are you all right?" she asked.

 

"Go away!" she protested while jerking away from the schoolgirl's touch. "I'm perfectly fine!"

 

"That's enough, Susune. You're letting your emotions cloud your judgment," interrupted a voice from the door.

 

"Kikyo-sama..." whispered the child.

 

Everyone instantly whirled around to see that the undead miko was indeed standing in the doorway, an unreadable expression dancing on her features with Inuyasha not far behind. Before anyone could say anything though, she shifted her attention from the girl to the rest of the people present and bowed slightly.

 

"I apologize for her outburst. But please understand that she has seen more in a few days than most would see in a lifetime and as such is exhausted both physically and emotionally," she said, making everyone goggle in surprise.

 

"That... is quite all right sister. We are used to see much worse in the matter of anger than what Susune has just demonstrated," answered Kaede while looking knowingly at a certain hanyou.

 

"And what's that supposed to mean?" replied the hanyou with a suspicious frown.

 

"That when it comes time to throw a fit, you're a master," explained Sango, making everyone but Kagome burst into fits of giggle.

 

Inuyasha threw the laughing bunch a death glare before deciding that going further into this argument would merely prove the demon slayer's claims. Instead, he chose to go with his traditional 'Keh', before crossing the room and flopping down unceremoniously beside the schoolgirl who seemed to find the floor extremely interesting since he had made his appearance.

 

Now that quieted everyone rather effectively, especially when Kikyo opted to take a place beside Sango, right across the hanyou.

 

"Inuyasha..." whispered Kagome, not daring to believe what was happening.

 

"What is it wench?" he asked sharply.

 

The schoolgirl frowned a little at Inuyasha's choice of tone, but it melted away when she saw something dancing in his golden orbs. A promise, a promise that explanations would come... later, when they were alone. And so, for the first time in days, Kagome felt happy, simply and utterly happy.

 

"Nothing," she answered softly. "Nothing at all."

 

"What once was... is no more. What could have been... is dead. All that remains... is what can be," spoke Kikyo with a small satisfied smile.

 

Once again, silence fell on the hut as everyone tried to digest this new bit of information that had been given to them. Eventually, it was Miroku who broke the silence with a light cough.

 

"Now then, far be it from me to harbor the idea of trying to pry information out of our two unexpected guests. But seeing as though we have all been going from one surprise to another ever since we entered this hut, I do believe that you'll excuse me if I ask very bluntly..." he said in the tone he normally used when speaking to a lord.

 

He then cleared his throat once more, letting his sentence hang for a little dramatic effect. Finally, he took a deep breath and, all at once, dropped all manner of countenance, adding yet another shock to everyone's list.

 

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!!!!"

 

******

 

"So a group of youkai has find a way to manufacture fuyouheki stones? That's a serious matter," said Sango gravely.

 

"Indeed, this means that they can now mingle with humans with virtually no means of detection," agreed Miroku.

 

"Yeah, but why? Youkai usually don't give a damn as to what humans do. So why would a group suddenly want to infiltrate human territory?" inquired Inuyasha.

 

"Who knows," shrugged Kagome. "But Kikyo, you said that the stone you saw dissolved almost immediately when you got hold of it."

 

"Indeed... but I am under the impression that this stone was of extremely low quality. Which would go with my theory that the rat I killed was merely a thug hired for the specific task of getting rid of Susune's village and then paid with cheap merchandise," answered the undead miko.

 

"Expendable servants paid with expendable goods," summarized Kaede. "They are definitively no weaklings."

 

"Indeed they are not. That is why we need your help. If we do not exterminate them, who knows what they will do in the future," pleaded Kikyo.

 

"Whoever wants to get to you is going to have to go through me," growled the hanyou menacingly.

 

"Count me in too," said Kagome firmly.

 

"This is not a matter to be taken lightly. I shall provide what assistance I can," added Miroku.

 

"I'm a demon slayer. I do have a reputation to maintain," concluded Sango with a playful wink at the undead miko.

 

"And me too! I'll help too!" piped in Shippo, who had kept silent since the beginning of the conversation.

 

Even though she had sort of known that they would not let her down, it was still a relief for Kikyo to actually hear them accept. It felt like an enormous weight had been lifted off her shoulders and she couldn't help the deep sigh of relief that escaped her lips at that very moment.

 

"Thank you all," she said with a respectful bow.

 

"Now now sister, no reason to get so formal," admonished Kaede when she saw the other woman's behavior. "You are here amongst friends after all."

 

"I..." stammered Kikyo, taken aback by the fact that these people would be so willing to accept her despite her obvious difference.

 

"Is this really okay?" she asked, feeling the familiar prickle of fear rear its ugly head. "Being friends with someone like me who is a walking dead..."

 

"Look around you Kikyo," answered Sango gently but firmly. "I think we're all old enough to know exactly what 'being friends with someone like you' means."

 

"But..." she tried one last time.

 

"Do you really believe that friendship is such a shallow feeling that stops to consider whether you're human, hanyou, youkai or a walking dead? Is it so hard for you to believe that maybe, just maybe someone in this world is willing to accept you as you are?" asked Kagome with a hint of sadness in her voice.

 

Kikyo jerked slightly as the words the schoolgirl had just spoken hit home. She was instantly reminded of the last few days passed in Susune's company. All of those times when the child had bugged her with questions, the times when she had cried and she had denied her the comfort she so desperately wanted. All of the things she had denied Susune... no, the things she had denied herself because she couldn't believe that the girl would accept her... No more though. Never again would she quell her heart's desires merely because she was different!

 

"Being different makes it sometimes hard to accept what others take for granted... but I shall give this 'friendship' a try," she finally said, a small smile dancing on her lips.

 

******

 

Susune walked grumpily through the streets of the village followed closely by the ever faithful Kirara. The day had started rather well, sleep had done its wonders on her and she felt ready to face whatever fate decided to throw her way. All during breakfast, she had been the center of conversation. It seemed like everyone wanted to know what it was like to see auras around people and what his or hers looked like. At first she had happily obliged, but things quickly got boring, if not downward tedious, especially when everyone decided to give her pointers. It had taken just about everything she had not to run out and scream in frustration

 

And then, of course, once they had been through with her, they had then turned to the topic of trying to turn the tables on the youkai that were after her. This had proved very tiring because no matter how much she had wanted to participate, they had simply smiled at her like what she was saying was utter foolishness.

 

Still she bore with it, if only because these people had decided to help her and Kikyo. Finally, when everyone decided that they wouldn't be able to find a solution right away, they had all resorted to ready some form of weaponry. That had sparked her interest almost immediately.

 

She had watched carefully as Sango inspected her hiraikotsu for any developing cracks and then started polishing it. Of course, she wasn't stupid enough to believe that she could wield such a weapon, so she had quickly diverted her attention to the woman's katana which seemed much more appropriate for her size. Seeing her unmasked interest in her weapon, the demon slayer had showed it to her, she even allowed her to hold it in her hands, which she did... rather clumsily.

 

Carefully avoiding Inuyasha's own weapon, which was a sword, she had turned to Kagome who was checking her own weapon's readiness, namely a bow. Now this had seemed a little more familiar somewhat, probably because she had seen Kikyo use it a few times. In any case, when she had held the weapon in her hand, in had felt almost... natural to have it there.

 

And then, the strangest occurrence yet, once she had finished this small round, Kikyo had simply stood up and left, beckoning for her sister to come along. She had meant to follow, but the miko had made it clear that she was not to come along. So she had waited... and waited... and waited... until she couldn't take it anymore. She simply had to get out of this cramped little hut.

 

Everyone being too busy to accompany her, they had merely stuck Kirara with her to "protect" her if danger ever came, though she failed to see what this small lovable kitty could possibly do to save her from danger.

 

And that was pretty much what her morning had been like... and why she was so positively peeved. Everyone had treated her like a baby and that was exceedingly annoying, especially considering that she was already ten.

 

"You seem to be angry, Susune," said the voice of Kikyo, jarring her out of her musing.

 

She whipped her head around to see that indeed, the miko was standing behind her, an unreadable expression on her face. For a second, she considered exploding with indignation at the unfair treatment she had been forced to endure so far, but realized that it wouldn't accomplish anything to snap at the woman considering that it wasn't her she was angry at.

 

"Since everyone's been treating me like a newborn baby, I think I have a right to feel this way," she muttered darkly.

 

Strangely enough, this caused Kikyo to smile and nod in satisfaction. "Very good. You have done well in your first lesson," she complimented.

 

"Lesson?" repeated the child, baffled.

 

"The reason why everyone has treated you like a baby was because I asked them to. By doing so, I wanted to teach you how to master your anger and not let it get the better of you, and I am proud to say that you passed. Patience, focus and a clear mind. Remember these because you are going to need them very soon," she explained to the stunned ten year old.

 

"What do you mean?" asked Susune, still having a hard time believing that everything that had happened this morning had been all an act.

 

"Follow me," beckoned the miko instead of answering.

 

The pair walked for a short while until they reached an open area where a circular target had been erected on a small stand. Upon closer inspection, the girl noticed that there was also a bow with a full quiver of arrows propped against it. Grabbing both items, Kikyo then proceeded to walk a certain distance from the target before she stopped. Without warning, she turned to her and looked at her with one of the most serious expressions she had ever seen.

 

"To learn how to use a weapon is to learn how to kill. Whether a youkai, a mere animal... or another human being. When you start upon this path, there is no turning back, you must walk it through to its end. Now, you once said that you wished to stand and fight. If you decide that this is still your wish then take this bow. However, if you find that the idea of killing someone else is too much for you, then we shall walk away from here and never talk about this again. So, which will it be Susune?" asked the miko.

 

The girl looked at the offered weapon, the words Kikyo had just spoken resonating in her head. Killing... she hadn't exactly thought about this when she had said that she actually wanted to fight. But the woman was right, weapons were made to hurt, that was their very reason to exist. So could she do this? Could she master the use of a weapon... and actually kill? No matter the reason, killing was still killing... right?

 

As she stared at the bow, feeling increasingly apprehensive at its view, a memory suddenly flashed in her mind.

 

--flashback--

 

She whimpered as the door shook once more on its hinges. Another hit and the youkai would break through and then, only a miracle would save them. Coming to a sudden decision, her father abruptly turned to her and her mother.

 

"Run! Both of you! I'll hold them off for as long as I can!" he exclaimed.

 

"But..." hesitated her mother, visibly not approving of the plan.

 

"It's the only way!" he snapped. "Now GO! Before it's too late!"

 

But it was already too late, just as he said those words, the door finally collapsed inward and the wolves came barreling in. They immediately went for her father, identifying him as the biggest threat. There was a second of hesitation on her mother's part before she hoisted her in her arms and jumped through a neighboring window. All Susune could do then was scream as she saw her father become overwhelmed by the youkai.

 

--end flashback--

 

As painful as the memory had been, it carried a powerful message, a message that Susune understood now with crystal clarity. As painful as killing another person might be, it was even more painful to watch someone you love die before your eyes without being to do anything to prevent it. Once she realized this, her apprehension disappeared, replaced instead by unwavering determination.

 

"I will fight, Kikyo-sama. Even if it means that I may kill someday, I won't stand idly by as people risk their lives for me. I will fight alongside them," she said firmly.

 

"Then... I will teach you," answered the miko and with that, she handed the bow to Susune.