InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Killing Time ❯ Stuck Together ( Chapter 2 )

Killing Time - Chapter 2

Stuck Together

 

++++++++ DAY 1 ++++++++++

 

InuYasha headed towards the one livable space of clearing in Toutousai's entire neighborhood. Three scrawny trees and two boulders surrounded a firepit the old coot used in the heat of the summer to cook his food, the embers in his house driving even him out into the relative cool. As he expected, his asshole brother was already there, having taken the higher boulder and planted himself on it like a king on his throne, surveying the vast expanse of nothingness. InuYasha growled and jumped up in the larger tree, determined not to place himself physically below the asshole down there. Unfortunately, the tree wasn't very stable, and it wavered a bit under his weight. Great, I'm going to live the next three days in fucking fear of falling out this fucking tree. That'll make even my fucking brother laugh.

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“Fuck!” he said to the air.

 

“Such anger, little brother,” Sesshomaru's voice was liquid hate. “You lose control too easily. It is unbecoming behavior for the son of a royal house.”

 

“Fuck you.”

 

“Your crude language would never be tolerated in your father's domain.” Sesshomaru unconsciously took on the paternalistic tone of a demon schoolmarm.

 

“Like you never get angry,” InuYasha sneered. “If your so, all, `sweetness and light,' why do you keep after Naraku all the time. Why don't you just leave him to me already?”

 

“You will not be able to kill him.”

 

“What the fuck to do you care?”

 

“Stop using that word.”

 

“What? Fuck?” InuYasha saw the scowl on his half-brother's face, and his ears swiveled forward as he realized that this word really bugged the arrogant bastard.

 

To test the theory he said, “Fuck.” Sesshomaru's nose twitched.

 

“Fuck.” An eyebrow tick this time.

 

“Fuck.” A frown.

 

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

 

Sesshomaru abruptly stood up and walked outside the desolate little clearing, his back to InuYasha, who started laughing.

 

“Right. You never get mad.” He kept laughing, noticing how stiff Sesshomaru's back was. Maybe this isn't going to be so bad after all, he thought to himself.

 

Silence fell upon them again, and they left it there as the day progressed. InuYasha was hugely bored, but he wasn't going to give in and actually talk to Sesshomaru. He'd rather die of boredom than be the first one to speak.

 

“Oyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoy,” the strangled sound of hunger rose from Sesshomaru's stomach, booming through the clearing to wake InuYasha from his stupor in the late afternoon. “Oyoyoy …. Oy.”

 

“What the fuck was that?” InuYasha said, wonder breaking into his voice. “Are you actually hungry? Do you even eat?”

 

Sesshomaru looked away and remained silent.

 

“I had no clue you actually lowered yourself to normal low-life activities like eating. Do you burp too?” InuYasha was on a roll. “Oh, my god! If you eat and burp, you must pee, too! Oh! Oh!” he almost panted with anticipation at his next quip, “and fart!” He started laughing again, only stopping to announce to the wilderness, “my brother, the great lord of the Dog Demon clan! He fucking farts like the rest of us!” InuYasha lost himself in laughter, tears rolling down his cheeks, until his tree buckled a little and he gulped up a laugh while trying to steady himself.

 

Sesshomaru was still. It occurred to his younger brother as the chuckles subsided and he gasped for breath that he was provoking one badass demon and he didn't have Tetsusaiga with him for comfort. “Heh, heh …..” he breathed heavily for a minute, waiting.

 

No word came from his brother. “Oyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoy,” InuYasha started giggling again.

 

“Why don't you just go get some food?” InuYasha asked finally, somehow sensing this might be a sore spot.

 

“What? You're obviously hungry.” InuYasha probed a bit more, “go hunt down some food already.” More silence.

 

“I do not hunt anymore.” It was hard to read any emotion in the flat voice that rose to his tree, but InuYasha could tell there was a story behind it.

 

“Huh,” InuYasha sounded skeptical. He almost made a quip about the difficulty of being a one-armed hunter, but thought better of it. He did have to survive the next two days, after all, and he was sure Sesshomaru was fully aware that he was missing an arm - all thanks to his little hanyou brother. But that didn't mean he was going to let this one go. “So, what do you eat? The souls of the dead? That would certainly explain your personality.” Ha! He thought to himself, got him with that one.

 

“No. I leave them to your girlfriend.” Ouch. A swipe at Kikyo, that bastard!

 

“You're a vegetarian?” InuYasha needed a good comeback, and this worked for him. He couldn't help it, he busted up laughing again. The very thought of his predatory brother sitting down to a plate of vegetables made him giddy. Once he had calmed down again a few minutes later, Sesshomaru spoke.

 

“A true lord does not need to hunt,” the snootiness in his voice caused InuYasha's eyes to roll of their own accord, “My manservant hunts for me.”

 

“Manservant?” InuYasha was incredulous. “You mean your toadservant, Jaken?” InuYasha smiled at this pathetic excuse. “Give me a break, Sesshomaru. That imp couldn't kill a piece of meat if it was already dead.” He tried hard not laugh, imagining Jaken trying to stab a dead boar and missing completely. “You're lying.” He waited, wondering if Sesshomaru's pride would let him get away with an outright fib.

 

Apparently not. With absolutely no hint of contrition, Sesshomaru said, straightening himself, “my gut no longer … tolerates … the venom from my claws.” Sesshomaru turned to InuYasha. “And Jaken is quite handy with the `staff of two heads.' He has learned over the years to crisp my prey to a perfect medium rare.”

 

“No shit,” InuYasha put on a good act of being amazed. “You've got acid reflux, so Jaken becomes a chef.” He laughed again. “That's rich.”

 

Quiet filled the air once again. No birds. No insects. Nothing but the occasional bubble of lava popping somewhere in the distance. Night fell and the stars came out. InuYasha's butt was getting tired of this wobbly tree, so he jumped down to build a fire. Sesshomaru did not budge.

“Don't bother to help, asshole,” InuYasha snarled as he sliced down the smaller of the trees and cut it neatly into small planks with his claws.

 

“Why do you bother with a fire?” Sesshomaru sounded genuinely curious, at least as curious as a flat, totally emotionless voice could sound.

 

“Why not?” InuYasha set about stacking the wood over the little bark shreds he was going to use for kindling. “Humans do it all the time.” He cringed as soon as he word `human' came out of his mouth. Now he knew he was in for a lecture about how awful humans were, how they had ruined the land for the demons, and how they all deserved to die horrible, disgusting deaths.

 

“Humans,” here it came, Sesshomaru's voice was full of disdain. “they are so weak and irrational.”

 

“Keh!” InuYasha was aware of the irony of his expletive, defending humans, indeed! He didn't care though. Anything to disagree with his brother.

 

“You scoff,” the elder brother intoned, “and you stupidly put yourself at the mercy of those silly creatures.” He shook his head ever so slightly. “if only you understood the demon realm, its symmetry, its elegant simplicity …” his voice trailed off dramatically, like an actor waiting for applause.

 

“Keh!” said InuYasha again. “What you don't know about humans would fill a baseball stadium.” He felt quite smug using an analogy he was sure Sesshomaru would not understand. He was richly rewarded.

 

“A what?” Sesshomaru accidentally blurted out. He quickly regained his composure, lifting his knee to place it on the boulder again, trying too hard to look regal, InuYasha noticed.

 

“A baseball stadium,” InuYasha did not try to hide the satisfaction of besting his brother in vocabulary, even if he was cheating by picking a word that would not be invented for several centuries. He reached up to give an unconscious tug on his baseball cap, and briefly thanked Kagome.

 

“Oh,” Sesshomaru said uncertainly, “a bazbul stadum.” He cleared his throat. “Of course, but …,” InuYasha saw that he was trying to come up with a comeback, “what you don't know about demons could fill the … the sky.”

 

The retort hung briefly in the air between them, and then fell flat on the ground. InuYasha almost thought he heard an audible splat.

 

“Oh, good comeback, bro.” InuYasha turned away to finish making the fire, shaking his head with mock sadness. “Can't you even tell a fucking joke?”

 

Coming Soon … Day 2