InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kindergarten Flirting ❯ Payback's a Wolf ( Chapter 24 )

Kindergarten Flirting

Back in kindergarten, your mother would tell you that if a boy pulls your pigtails he likes you, and if he dips them in paint he loves you. That goes for the rest of your life too. Moreover, when you're an adult and work for the Hottest Man of the Year.

.xx.

Because her clothing had been shredded, Kagome had opted to up her taste in clothing (Inuyasha said she sexified it more than it was humanly possible). She had pulled on one of Inuyasha's red dress shirts and used his belt to tie around her waist, to give the impression that she was adorning a tunic. Using his stealth-like ability, Inuyasha swiped one of Rin's tights and gave it to Kagome so that the girl had some form of pants to accompany her top. She tied her hair up into a ponytail before throwing her sweater on. Inuyasha studied her final product.

"You're looking very sexy." He grinned. Kagome smiled and dusted some invisible dust off of her shoulders.

"Tell me something I don't know." Inuyasha snorted before wrapping an arm around her waist and guiding her out of his mansion. The workers saw but didn't see them; turning their head as if all was normal. It was one thing Inuyasha was appreciative about his staff; they never tattled.

"Kita," He called to one of the maids. She turned her head and looked at him.

"Sir?"

"Make sure the place doesn't smell icky, will you?"

Kagome burst into laughter and Kita rolled her eyes. "Why, so Young Master Shippo won't tell on you?"

"Exactly."

Kita shook her head and informed him that she will get to making sure the place didn't smell icky. Inuyasha guided Kagome to the front gate and the doorman held the giant doors open for them. Inuyasha and Kagome nodded in thanks and stepped out of the mansion to see the valet bringing Inuyasha's car into the roundabout. Kagome was amused.

"You have a very efficient team."

"I know," his ego skyrocketed. The valet threw the keys at Inuyasha and he caught them with ease; he approached the passenger door and held it open for Kagome. "My lady."

"Why thank you." Kagome batted her eyelashes as she boarded the vehicle. Inuyasha, languidly, walked to the driver's side before getting in and leaning over to steal a kiss from the woman who stole his heart. He popped the key into the ignition and revved his before pulling out of the roundabout. The valet and the doorman watched them drive off before turning to one another.

"Are you gonna tell Izayoi?" The valet asked.

"Tell Izayoi what? Nothing happened… the Young Master is a respectable young lad that doesn't drive off with women wearing his clothing." The doorman coughed. The valet raised his eyebrow.

"Sure, whatever you say…"

"Boy, you'll learn to not see things that go about in this mansion. For instance," the doorman grinned, "you will never see Master Sesshomaru sneaking ice cream and cookies to Young Master Shippo before dinner. Lady Rin would be quite upset if he did that, but he doesn't."

The valet hooted in laughter. "I love this place!"

.xx.

"Well then," Kagome got comfortable in her seat and grinned at Inuyasha. They were on their way to the hospital but it was quite a drive from Inuyasha's mansion; so, Kagome thought she'd make it an interesting ride.

"Would you rather…" her eyes twinkled, "Be trapped in an elevator with wet dogs or three fat men with horrible breath?"

Inuyasha raised his eyebrow. "Wet dogs don't bother me wench," he winked at her, "I grew up with Sesshomaru, remember?"

Kagome laughed and rolled her eyes. "Fine, that wasn't a fun question. Your turn!"

"Alright then," he took a left turn, "would you rather eat a bunny or a deer?"

Kagome's eyes widened in horror. "NEITHER! But if I had to pick, I'd pick the deer… I used to have a pet bunny when I was younger, but Souta lost her."

"And I ate her after I found—OW! I'm kidding!" Inuyasha pouted as Kagome threw a sucker punch at him. "I'm sorry; I did not eat your bunny, happy?"

"No, but it's my turn." She cracked her knuckles. "Would you rather be pinned to a tree for fifty years or be faced planted into the ground upon command, whenever I say osuwari?"

Inuyasha seemed to consider this. "Well… being pinned to a tree won't get me amazing Kagome-sex soo," he laughed at the appalled look on her face, "I pick the osuwari thing. But it doesn't mean I have to like it."

"You're just horny."

"That I am, my turn!" Inuyasha was having fun. "Would you rather go shopping with mother or Rin? Both are incredibly painful in their own respect."

Kagome didn't even have to think. "With your mother. Any woman who thinks Mufasa from the Lion King is a sexy lion is bearable to shop with in my books."

"Keh," Inuyasha scoffed, "I'll tell Rin you didn't pick her!"

"Don't start a war," Kagome chided. "I never said I didn't want to shop with Rin… I just would rather your mother more." Inuyasha laughed as she tried to defend herself. Pouting, she continued on with her question. "Would you rather cut off all of Sesshomaru's hair while he's sleeping or tell your mother that you found love with somebody of the same sex?"

Inuyasha was horrified. "WOMAN!"

"Answer!"

He groaned. "Ugh! Fine… umm… tell my mother I'm homosexual."

"REALLY?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah. If I cut Sesshomaru's hair off then Rin will cut my balls off. Telling mother that I'm homosexual doesn't make me really homosexual. I can pretend to go through a phase before I realize that my godly man-physique is meant for women alone."

"Uh-huh," Kagome was highly amused. "Your turn."

"Sex in a tree or your mother's bed?"

"GAH! Tree!" Kagome was disgusted. "My mother's bed? Really, that's nasty."

"Just asking, gosh. Your turn."

"Would you rather have sex in Sesshomaru's bed or Jakotsu's bed?"

Inuyasha felt like he was about to die and fall into an endless pit. "You have a twisted mind woman." Kagome laughed at his statement. "I'd have sex standing up against a wall before I went anywhere near either of their bedrooms."

"Answer!"

"Fine, fine. Sesshomaru… I think I just vomited a bit in my mouth."

Giggling, Kagome leaned over and kissed his cheek. "You're adorable. Your turn!"

"Would you rather have my epic demon cock for the rest of eternity or chocolate and ice cream?"

Kagome raised both of her eyebrows. "Can't I have both? I heard chocolate covered cock is all the rage."

"Nope," Inuyasha grinned stupidly as he pulled into the hospital parking lot, "you can only pick one. What's more valuable to you?"

Kagome mentally groaned. "That's so hard… oh hey look! The hospital; well that was a fun little game we played. We should do it again sometime!" Without warning, she jumped out of the passenger seat and began running towards the front gate.

"THE QUESTION ISN'T THE ONLY THING THAT'S HARD, WENCH!"

She flipped him the bird.

Inuyasha laughed.

Never a dull moment with that one.

.xx.

Kagome was just about ready to break into a happy dance when she entered Souta's room and saw him sitting the hospital bed in regular clothing. Korari was beaming and Inuyasha couldn't help but grin broadly. Souta laughed sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his head.

"Relax, Nee-chan."

Kagome just laughed. She was so happy. Word could not describe the state that she was in; all the while Inuyasha had his arms crossed and watched her as if she was a child in a candy store. She was something else, alright – her carefree attitude, her snappy personality (which he loved setting off on every occasion), the way she looked at him sometimes…

Everything.

Inuyasha saw Kagome run a finger down a faint scar Souta had on his cheek. He pushing himself off of the doorframe and called out to the Higurashi family: "Are we ready to leave this hell hole?"

Souta was the one to grin the broadest – he was finally able to go home and put this episode behind him.

.xx.

Inuyasha helped Souta up the Shrine steps (in actuality, Inuyasha told Souta to get onto his back so Inuyasha could run up the steps for him) and Kagome and her mother gathered Souta's stuff and climbed the steps in their own pace. Their grandfather opened the shrine door and threw saffron at Souta. Inuyasha sneezed.

Even though Inuyasha was ready to wail at the top of his lungs to stop throwing that shit at his face, he kept his mouth shut. He knew that the Higurashi family was more than ecstatic over the fact that the youngest member of their Clan had returned from the hospital, in one piece. After what felt like an eternity, Jii-chan moved out of the way and Inuyasha took Souta to the make-shift bedroom his sister made on the main floor of the Shrine.

"I miss how home smells," Souta inhaled deeply.

"I sure as hell won't miss how fucking saffron smells." The half-demon murmured in annoyance, still trying to get the smell out of his nose. Souta laughed as Inuyasha gingerly placed him on the "bed" before taking a step back.

"HELP!" Kagome wailed and Inuyasha turned around just in time to see her trip over a shoe and land on her face, with Souta's crutches landing on her. The room was silent for five seconds before Inuyasha and Souta – simultaneously- burst into uncontrollable laughter. Souta held his sides and Inuyasha toppled over, not being able to keep balance. Kagome sat up and blew her hair out of her face, glaring apprehensively at the two boys that laughed. Korari helped her up to her feet and Jii-chan shook his head in amusement.

Oh the joys of having grandchildren.

"I hate you both," she snarled at her brother and … "boyfriend" (although she hated referring him to that, he kind of held that title… kind of. Not officially, but unofficial is the new official, isn't it?).

"Sorry Nee-chan," Souta hiccupped through his laughter, "but that was… kinda, sorta… epic…"

Inuyasha could only nod in agreement. Glaringly, Kagome threw her nose in the air and huffed into the kitchen to get some food for the newly returned Souta and the jackass Inuyasha. How she hated how much she cared about him – how much that level of care shot up in the past couple of weeks. Truly, that man was a complete and utter moron that had the mental capacity of a kindergartener, but he was nothing short of amazing.

Both in person and in bed.

Seeing that the only moderately edible thing they had was ramen, Kagome began boiling a pot of water. She heard her family and Inuyasha laugh and joke in the living room (now Souta's bedroom) and couldn't help but smile. He got along with her family…

That's a plus.

.xx.

Wednesday morning had dawned. Kagome received a wake-up call thanks to her best friend who whined and wailed about how she wasn't invited for Souta's grand return. Kagome rolled her eyes and looked at the clock; 7am.

"We wanted to spend time alone with him."

"But Miroku told me that Inuyasha was over at your place!"

Pause.

"You talk to Miroku?"

Another pause.

"No."

Explosion.

"WHAT THE HELL? HOW COME I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS!"

Snort, courtesy of Sango. "Because you're way too preoccupied with Inuyasha to even call me anymore these days. I'm keeping tabs on you thanks to a little birdie named Miroku."

"That isn't called keeping tabs. That's called stalking, what're you doing after school today?"

Sango yawned; she had just woken up thanks to a wake-up call from Miroku. Funny how chain reactions worked. "Grade some drawings the kids made, why?"

"Wanna grab dinner?"

"Your treat?"

"I never said my treat; I just said if you wanted to grab dinner…" Kagome grinned. "That kind of implies that you're taking me grocery shopping so I can make us dinner tonight. Bring Kohaku, he needs to carry grocery bags before tackle-glomping my baby brother."

"He would too." Sango murmured. "Alright, it's a date! KOHAKUUUU!"

"Let the boy sleep!"

"No way, if I'm awake then he has to be awake."

Kagome sighed. That was something she'd do to her brother, no doubt about that. "Alright, go wake him up from la-la land. Remind me to ask you an important question tonight."

"Ask me now!"

"No tonight, oh look my other wake-up call is calling."

"Inuyasha?"

"How'd you guess." Kagome's voice was oozing with sarcasm. The two girls bade each other farewell before Kagome flipped the line to her object of affection.

"Morning," Inuyasha breathed into the phone. Kagome's heart fluttered.

"Morning, you just wake up?"

"Yeah," Inuyasha yawned, "I'm sending Jaken to take you to work. I'm gonna sleep in a bit…"

Kagome twitched. "Are you kidding me?"

"Nope." Inuyasha smirked. "If you need anything, text me."

"Do you ever change?"

"Nope," he laughed, "I love you babe."

"Go shove a carrot up your tiny anus."

"… excuse me?"

"Yeah, you heard me! Go shove a carrot up your tiny anus! Bye!" Kagome hung up her phone and huffed into the bathroom, steam coming out of her ears. Oh the nerve… he's sending a driver to take me to work because he could sleep in? A coy grin began to form on Kagome's lip. Karma is a bitch, Inuyasha… wait, if he's half dog-demon, is bitch even an insult?

Oh the great mysteries of life…

.xx.

"SO THEN!" Yura breathed as both women entered the office languidly. Yura was going on about a fight she had with her husband the previous night and how she locked him out of their bedroom. The details were quite amusing, as they were fighting over whether somebody fed their pet hamster or not.

The question Kagome was pondering was why somebody would have an overgrown mouse as a pet.

Gerbils were worse.

And guinea pigs? Don't get her started…

"So then he became incredibly horny and needed amazing Yura-pussy, so he begged to come back into the bathroom so that he could cum and make babies with you, right?" Kagome was sarcastic, so it took her by surprise when Yura exclaimed:

"HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW?"

"Really?"

"Yeah!" Yura's eyes were wide. "You, my dear, have fortune telling powers."

Kagome winked at her. "Wanna know what I see in Inuyasha's near future?"

Yura paused, loving the tone in Kagome's voice. "What?"

"A full agenda," Kagome tapped her chin, "schedule him a meeting every hour. Make sure 4 o'clock to 5 o'clock is double booked… say it's a meeting with Puppy Trails' marketing team." Yura smirked and nodded. Kagome kept telling her the plan.

"And, would you look at that! His secretaries have gone home sick. Have Victor knock on his door at exactly noon telling him that you and I have gone home with the flu," Yura's smirk widened, "and we accidentally crashed the mainframe."

"I love the wicked in you. But why the prank?"

"Asshole called me this morning to tell me he's sending his driver to take me to work because he wants to sleep in."

"Ouch," Yura smirked, "I can imagine what you'd do when you get married."

"WE AREN'T GETTING MARRIED!"

"Right. And I'm a toad."

"Well…"

"Don't say anything!" Yura shot playfully before she headed over to her computer to create Inuyasha's busy schedule. Kagome merely smirked evilly.

Payback's a wolf. I think wolf is more of an insult than bitch to a dog-demon…

.xx.