InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Letters From The Heart ❯ Run Away ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Letters From The Heart
One

From Kagome, To Inuyasha

Run Away

Why do I always run away? I thought you knew by now. I thought… well every time you meet up with them and they tell you I'm gone… well I thought the answer would remain clear. But, as it is, you're blind. Even having it spelled out in front of you.
The truth…
I don't leave to get rid of you. I don't leave because I hate you. I need my privacy, I'm a girl - I don't have to stay with you twenty-four seven, do I? But that's not the only reason… it's not just that. There's more.

I did it again today. I know when you're furious, because you don't leave me alone for long. Which is why you can't deny the fact that you miss me. If you didn't miss me, why would you follow me? What's wrong with their company?

Not a minute's peace. I don't get that from you. I don't have the honour. But. With you. Being with you is relaxing - provided our hours are kept villain-free. It's fun - me and you.
That's why I run away. So you can follow me. So we can be together and have that privacy. Just the two of us.

No interruptions. Except you don't see it that way. You think I take off to annoy you. Is that just you? Or do all boys think like that? I thought you knew by now how I feel. Isn't it obvious? Not that I drop hints… But you sure do. Maybe not on purpose, but most of the time your feelings are written all over your face.

Huh? Why don't I tell you? Tell you what? Why don't I tell you I'm going back to my time…? Just in case. Just in case you don't follow me. Just in case something awful happens when I'm not around. No one would come and break the bad news to me. It's only you and I who can go through the well.

If something… say, if you died. Then it would be impossible for me to think that the last word I said to you was `goodbye' or `I'm going - SIT!'. I'd hate for us to part on an argument. Do you understand? No. I don't think you do.

Well, you understand - but you don't agree. “Keh, nothing will happen to me!” That's your reaction. You're full of it. You always argue back at me - always. Still, I know you're afraid. But don't hide anything from me. I know you're scared that one day you'll hurt me or I'll hurt you - maybe one day I'll betray you. Just like she did.
But I promise you. I'll trust you till the day I die.

And trust isn't the only emotion I hold for you. The one that's most important is exactly the one you try to hide. We don't have to say it, we both know. But nothing's gonna happen between us unless we break this silence. But, this isn't speaking to you, is it? This is just a letter.

I won't cry. Why should I? There's no reason for me to. But I can feel these salty drops in my eyes and I'm laughing. Laughing, here and now. Do you know why? Because you're here. Or rather, downstairs.

You couldn't let me be gone long. Footsteps on the stairs that are like mini-earthquakes. You really do stomp too loud, you know? I don't care. I'll put this away before you see it. Because I'm not ready to give this to you yet. When I'm a little braver…

It's always going to be held off isn't it? So why don't I just let you read it?
I can't. Not while standing here. What if you reject me? I couldn't-

Here. Read this and look back, if we're ever apart - look at this letter and think of me.
Why? Because it tells you how I feel. Even if I don't say it out loud. Here are my feelings.
I love you.

And you don't ever have to tell me, because I know you feel the same. I don't care if I'm second best, so long as I know you love me back.
Here: I'll always be in writing. If we're ever separated. If anything ever happens. Nothing can keep us apart in our minds. Remember that.

Am I saying too much? I'm blabbering, damn it. You probably can't be bothered to read this trash anyway - you always were impatient. Smile.
Thinking of you lights my face up, I don't know why - you just have this effect on me.

Why do I always run away? I don't hate you. It's a game, you see? I run, you chase. Sort of like a never-ending kiss chase where you'll never catch me. Na-na, na-na-na! Maybe one day you'll catch me. Maybe one day you'll get to kiss me. Game over. But we both win at the same time, understand?

Deep down… yes. Yes, you do. And I think that after reading this you'll be smiling too. Or blushing. I know it here in my heart.
A thousand times over, I could write this letter with the three little words I think about when I see you. The words I can't form my mouth to speak. But isn't it obvious by now? You never were perceptive…

So all these words are screaming at you. Have you come to the conclusion yet? You may hate me for writing this down. You may hate yourself for keeping it. But no matter what we try to come up with, there's only one escape.
Destiny brought us together. Deal with it.