InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Lonely World ❯ "I feel you fading away" ( Chapter 3 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Anubis_Himura 
again... volumes are spoken
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Hentai | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 01.06.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 4.9K | Visits: 478 | Status: Completed
again... volumes are spoken
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Hentai | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 01.06.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 4.9K | Visits: 478 | Status: Completed
Chapter 3:
"I feel you fading away" ~ Kai
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
"Kagome..." I sighed under my breath.
"Why did you lie to me? Didn't you smell Kagome there? I know you were lying Yasha. Just yesterday you were asking me to show you how to love her." Miroku stated, I could see anger in his eyes and for an instant was I was frightened.
"I lied to you because I didn't want to admit it was my fault. I should have known to wait until we were in our time before confessing my love. When I sensed Kagome, I had to make her go home. I was trying to be a good person. She isn't meant to be here, forever," I paused sighing deeply, "with me."
"Maybe she is Inuyasha! Kagome came to this well for a purpose, how do you know that purpose wasn't to be your life mate?" Miroku asked eagerly.
"Because, then she wouldn't have been born 500 years later!" I yelled in retaliation. I was determined to believe that I had done the right thing by making Kagome hate me.
"I see your logic, but I still see my own. I believe that Kagome has a purpose, in our world. Maybe that purpose, is to show you how to let your guard down. To have a family with you ." he emphasized his words, burning them deep into my brain.
I watched my 'friends' sleep as I sat in the hut thinking of ways to prove that I was being the good guy. I could only think of one thing; I was a dumb ass.
Kagome's POV ~~~~
"Kouga! You frightened me." I was breathing heavily, trying to get my heartbeat back down to normal.
"I did not mean to Kagome. I merely heard your yelling and wanted to come and see what was wrong. Have you been crying?" he rushed closer to me, "A girl as gorgeous as you should never ruin her eyes by crying. Tell me what happened." I looked into his eyes and began to cry again. I poured my heart out to him, telling him everything. Every last action, every last word that was spoken.
"Kagome. I am so sorry, you left your pack, uhh family rather? Now Inuyasha doesn't want to be with you? What a tragic night indeed." His words were full of sympathy, normally I would have lied and told him I was fine and that I didn't care, but I did care and I couldn't hide my feelings any longer. I cried into Kouga's strong chest, I cried until I saw the sun coming up over the horizon.
"I have to go. Inuyasha will know that I am still here." I got off the ground and began to walk away when Kouga grabbed my arm.
"Please, you can't be alone in this world. There are beasts whom great demons even fear." Kouga said, I felt him shudder slightly.
"I can't stay here, and I can't go home. What else am I going to do but wander?" I looked into Kouga's eyes and I could see his answer. "Kouga, I can't go with you-"
"Not as my mate. Just as a companion. A friend. I will take care of you until you have a plan and then I will let you go." he paused briefly, "unless you choose to stay." he added.
"That is really very sweet, but-" I couldn't find a reason not to so I gave in, for lack of a better plan, "Okay, thank you. I will be out of your hair in a day or two." I smiled at him and he moved his hand down my arm to place his hand in mine.
At Kouga's den his clan looked at me as though I were lunch, causing me to grab onto Kouga's arm in fear. He smiled at me, I think he liked being a protector. I allowed him to be happy, still holding his arm as we crossed passed dozens of hungry demon wolves.
"They aren't going to eat me are they?" I whispered into Kouga's ear.
"No, they wont. Unless I tell them too. As far as they are concerned, I brought you in so it is my job to decide what is to be done with you." he stated calmly.
"Kouga! Who is this, and, more importantly, can we eat it?" an elderly wolf spoke and I grew some courage letting go of Kouga's arm.
"No you cannot eat me! I will have you know that I am a friend of Kouga's and I will not be eaten by the likes of yo-" Kouga put his hand over my mouth as I tried to yell furthermore at the wolves.
"Oh, she is feisty, that makes them taste sweeter." another wolf said. I was beginning to think Kouga had led me into a trap.
"Please back off! Kagome is my love, no she isn't going to be my mate, but I do love her and no one will eat her unless they want to die!" Kouga screamed at them. I smiled, what a relief.
"Thank you Kouga." I told him.
"Anything for you my love." looking at him from the side, he looked kind of dashing.
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
It has been weeks, and I still can't pick up Kagome's sent. I just know she didn't go through the well. I know she is still here. But where is she?
"Inuyasha, we have to get going, there is rumor of a jewel shard in the next village." Sango looked up to the roof where I was sitting.
"Who cares? Nothing matters."
"But if we don't go, not only will the shard get away, but people will die Inuyasha." Sango said pleadingly.
"So, it isn't Kagome, so who cares?" I continued to look up at the sky. I heard Sango curse as she went back into the hut. Moments later her and Miroku left for the village.
"Inuyasha, it's been a really long time since Kagome has been here. Where is she?" Shippo jumped on the roof and looked at me. No one had told him the truth, we couldn't hurt his little heart.
"I don't know Shippo." I looked down at the little Kitsune. I saw the sadness in his eyes that I felt in my heart. "But I will find her!" I stood up and jumped off the roof.
"Wait Inuyasha, you'll need help!" Shippo said eagerly.
"You stay here. Tell the others what I am doing. I'll get help." As much as I hated to admit it to myself, maybe Kouga could help me. He was fast, and if he knew Kagome was 'missing' he would gladly search, even if it meant teaming up with me.
Morning had just arrived, a red sky was rising. I tried not to think of anything as I ran along the forest. I could smell Kouga everywhere, it seemed as though he had recently been around. I chased his sent toward the old caves, they were suppose to be abandoned. I was almost to the cave when I ran into something. I hadn't been paying attention so I had no idea what I had smashed into. I looked up at the object, and my eyes widened in fear. "No, it can't be..."
Kagome's POV ~~~~
"Kouga, I found an abandoned hut, I've been going there every day, no one lives there. So I am,"
"You are moving out, aren't you?" Kouga looked at me with hurt in his eyes.
"I am sorry, you knew I couldn't stay here forever. I am sorry." I looked away, I couldn't stand his piercing gaze.
"I knew this day would come, true, but I didn't want to believe it." He laughed despite himself. "I love you Kagome. Always know that I am here for you when you need me." Kouga said peacefully.
"Thank you." I ran up to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. I then walked away without looking back.
I found myself walking aimlessly. I didn't know why I left the comfort of Kouga, he provided for me, and he was really nice to me. I knew that he would never leave me or make me feel like I was a rotten person. Then again, he did just want me for a mate so I could breed. I didn't know what to think. I had been lost for weeks. I cried myself to sleep every night, still thinking of Inuyasha. I couldn't get over what he did to me. Maybe I should go home and apologize to my mother? No, she would never accept it. But it was worth a try. After all, I need more clothes, and I missed my grandpa and Sota. I can go to the hut and drop some things off then go home. I miss Miroku, Shippo, and Sango too. I should go see them, maybe I can even see Inuyasha. No I don't want to see him! I found myself at my new home already. I went in to the dusty, dank hut. "Welcome home Kagome." I said out loud. I put down my bag and began to dust. After a few minutes I got bored and decided it was time to face the music with my mother. I grabbed my bag and went to the well.
"Sango, I told you I've tried a hundred times, I don't have any jewel shards so I can't get through the well!" I heard Miroku yelling, he sounded a hundred miles away.
"Miroku! Keep trying, I miss her. I hope she is okay." Sango's frightened voice called back, she sounded closer.
"Sango, maybe we should wait for Inuyasha to get back. He can always get through the well." Miroku said calmly.
"But he is searching for her too, he could be gone days." I heard Sango's voice begin to shake.
"You guys! I've missed you so much!" I ran to the well where they were standing.
"Kagome!" they exclaimed in unison, "We've missed you so much!"
"I missed you guys too! Sorry I scared you!" I hugged them both close. I didn't realize how much they meant to me.
"Where is Shippo and Kirara?" I asked looking around for them.
"Kirara took Shippo to find Inuyasha so we could get him to take us down the well to find you." Sango explained.
"Oh." I stood in silence. "How-" I began, but I couldn't bring myself to ask.
"Inuyasha is devastated. He is so mad at himself that he-" Miroku began to explain but Sango elbowed him in the stomach.
"If he wants to explain that is for him to do." Sango said sternly.
"You are right Sango. Thank you anyway Miroku." I smiled at him.
"So where have you been? We've been looking for you for three weeks!" Sango asked changing the subject. Bless her.
"Oh well, I was living with Kouga." I looked at the ground, nervous they would get the wrong impression.
"Good, I am glad you found a place to stay." Sango said supportively.
"I have my own place now though! Wanna see?" I asked excitedly.
"Sure!" they agreed in unison, sometimes I thought they were sharing a brain.
I took them on the semi-long journey to my new 'house'. They entered and looked around my one room hut. From the empty space, to the last dust-mite.
"I intend to fill it with more stuff. I am going to go home though, and see if I can make up with my mother. If I can then I am going to move back and finish school. If not, then I guess Feudal Japan is my new home." I tried to smile, but I really did want to finish my education.
"Well, we should let you go back. If you want to visit us, you know where we stay." Sango said placing a caring hand on my shoulder.
"Thanks, but I don't think I can bring myself to go to your house. Maybe, we can meet at the well, or meet here sometime." I smiled at them and they nodded their heads to agree. "Well, see you later, I promise, even if I do decide to live there, in my time, I will come back to see you all. Tell Shippo I miss him and sorry for causing him so much pain." I gave another feeble smile.
I walked back to the well, contemplating if I should really leave my friends again. I thought about staying, just to catch a glimpse of Inuyasha, but I couldn't stand it. I wanted to see him, but only so I could tell him he was a jerk. I decided it would be better for my Karma to just leave and never return. I jumped into the blackness.
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
"What are you doing here! You are not welcome here! Please leave!" I couldn't help myself from freaking out. I didn't know what to do, I thought she had died, again.
"Inuyasha, do you really insist on getting rid of me? After all you have no girl to use as a back up." her words froze me the ground. "Please Inuyasha, I need you with me. You are the only thing that has kept me from going to a peaceful rest."
"Kikyo... I am sorry, I don't love you anymore. I don't think I ever truly did. I am sorry." I was still frozen, but some how I found my voice to be stronger then it was before.
"You love the other girl don't you? The one who is said to be my reincarnation?"
"Kagome. Her name is Kagome. And," suddenly I found my strength, "I love her with every ounce of my heart and soul!" I stood up and took a step towards Kikyo. I didn't want to scare her, but I did want her to leave me alone.
"How could you? She doesn't even love you, just yesterday I saw her with a wolf demon, looking rather cozy in his den." Kikyo smiled, knowing I was getting jealous.
"Kouga..." I muttered under my breath. "I don't care what you say Kikyo! Kagome does love me! And I love her! And I wont give up on her! I don't care if I have to wait the rest of my unnaturally long demon life! I will wait for her!" I barked at her. I couldn't contain my anger, even though I had once loved Kikyo, it was over fifty years ago, and even back then I didn't know if I loved her. We had barely begun to have feelings when we 'betrayed' each other. I am a lot happier with Kagome then I could ever be with Kikyo or had ever been. I had made up my mind, Kagome was the love of my life, and I would not let her go, even if she was from another time. I didn't care. I had to be with her, no matter what it cost. I could use the jewel and become a human for her, and live in her time if she asked me too. For her, I would die, as long as she would be happy.
"Inuyasha..." I couldn't see any emotion in Kikyo's clay body, I felt sorry for her, she didn't deserve to be tortured by having to live as an empty spirit roaming the earth. Maybe one day I would kill her, and allow her to rest.
"I have to go Kikyo. Good bye." I said calmly as I walked by her on my way to Kouga's den. That dirty bastard, if he had violated Kagome, I'd kill him!
Kouga's POV ~~~~
I could sense the mutt from miles away, I had to laugh at the thought of him having a soul and actually looking for Kagome. If that was indeed what he was doing. I noticed he walked into the cave and began pushing people out of the way yelling Kagome's name.
"What do you want mutt?" I asked calmly looking at him with a bored expression.
"Listen here you dirty wolf! Where is Kagome? Hand her over now! She is coming back with me!" Inuyasha was in a bad mood, and I loved watching him get even more angry.
"Oh Kagome, yes she is sleeping. You see we were so busy making love last night, she is still tired even though it is well into the day." I lied to him through an evil smirk. I couldn't help it, I loved toying with his head.
"WHAT!? You... You and her!? Right that makes sense!" he shouted sarcastically. I began to laugh at him as he began to look around all the beds, searching for Kagome. Once I was convinced he had wasted a good deal of energy I broke the news to him.
"Mutt! I was kidding! You are so thick! She moved out this morning. She said she was going to live in a small hut she found somewhere. Maybe even try and move home." I shook my head at him, he was so dumb.
"She moved out! I can pick up here sent then!" he shouted in excitement, "You didn't really..." he made an odd motions with his hands, entwining them and clapping slightly.
"Make love?" I asked, pretending to be naive.
"Yes!" Inuyasha shouted. I smiled, I knew if I lied Kagome would kill me, but if I told him the truth he would make some idiotic comment and try to kill me. I decided I would just stand there and look mysterious for a few moments.
"Well?! Did you!?" he yelled.
"No, we didn't, gods, you stupid mutt!" I yelled, it was obvious Kagome loved him, was he really that dense.
"Okay, I am going to go before I loose her sent." he ran out of the cave, but stopped suddenly, "thanks Kouga." he turned around and disappeared around the cave wall.
"Thanks?"
Kagome's POV ~~~~
On the other side of the well I could hear the end of school bells chime. Well it is the weekend. I thought. I sighed deeply and climbed my way up the well. The shrine still looked the same, did I really expect it to change after three weeks? Yes, I suppose I did. Though, I did see Sota for about an hour every Saturday, but I still expected things to be different. I walked into the house, the first time I had been inside in almost a month. It wasn't any different. If anything, it was exactly the same. I sighed heavily, not knowing what wrath I would get. I walked into the kitchen to see my mother doing dishes. I stood in the doorway and closed me eyes. I opened them and announced my presence.
"Mom," I said in a weak voice.
"Kagome?!" she sounded thrilled, she turned around and dropped the dish she was washing on the floor. "Oh Kagome, I was so worried you had died! I am so sorry, I missed you so much. I am so, so, so sorry." she had run up to me and was now hugging me closely. "I don't care who you date, you were right, Inuyasha is a nice guy, I am so sorry, you can be with him, just please never leave us for so long again. I was so frightened you had been eaten, or if you were still here, I was afraid you had been raped and murdered. I am so sorry, I love you Kagome, you are the best daughter in the world, I love you." she continued to hug me and cry on my shoulder. I held her back tightly, so relieved that she didn't hate me.
"I love you mom, and I am so sorry. You were right about Inuyasha. I should never have chosen him over my own family. I am also sorry that I was going to sleep with him. I don't know what I was thinking. I am sorry mom." I hugged my mother again.
"Oh Kagome, you are old enough to make your own choices I am sorry. If you had slept with him, and told me later, I don't think I would have cared as much. But since I saw you, it kind of made me feel awkward, so I lashed out. I am so sorry sweetheart. What do you mean I was right about Inuyasha?" she began to make tea, and we went into the living room. I told her the whole story about me hearing his conversation with Miroku, and how I lived with Kouga and his clan for three weeks until I found a hut, and that I was afraid she would hate me.
"Oh Kagome, I am so happy you are home. And I've heard you talk about Inuyasha before, I think he was putting up his walls again. I could see in his eyes, he loves you Kagome. Look at the way he tried to kill poor Hojo that day." my mother slightly laughed, "please, Inuyasha needs you. I can tell, he is lonely and scared. He needs a sweet girl like you to make him sit." I laughed with my mother. How could I have ever left her? I knew she would never hate me. Why would I leave? I heard the door open, and I knew it must be Sota.
"Mom, I'm home." I heard him call from the kitchen.
"I'm in the living room with-" I nudged my mom gently and put my finger up to my lips to tell her to be quiet. She nodded and smiled deviously.
"What was that mom?" I saw Sota walk into the room and I jumped out at him,
"SURPRISE!" I screamed happily.
"KAGOME! You are home! You and mom are talking, you made up? Yay my sister!" Sota hugged me closely. I hugged him back, even though I had seen him, it was much more better when I didn't have to do it in secret.
"Where is Grandpa?" I asked looking at my mother.
"He went out for some kind of spell book or something. He insisted it would bring you home." my mother chuckled slightly, but I guess in a weird way it worked.
"I do miss Yasha though." I sighed, sitting back on the couch.
"Why don't you talk to him? It is the weekend, you have two days before school." my mother looked at me and smiled.
"Yeah, I guess. I think I should spend the weekend catching up though, I'll call Hojo and see what I have missed. I think I am going to tell him the whole story too. I feel bad for leaving him in the dark."
"Kagome. I think in this case, it is better he is left in the dark." Sota was sitting on my lap and he looked up at me as he spoke. His eyes looked so big, and playful. He reminded me of Shippo. I missed Shippo.
"Maybe, well I will tell him some stuff. I better go do that though, before he makes other plans." I said looking trying to get up and look for the phone. Sota moved off my legs and I stood up.
"Are you kidding?" my mom called from the living room as I entered the kitchen, "that boy has nothing to do but wait for you. He is obsessed, it isn't healthy really." I laughed at my mothers comment and picked up the phone.
I dialed Hojo's number and waited, he answered on the first ring. I asked him if he would like to get together tonight and we could talk, maybe even see go to dinner or something. He replied immediately with an enthusiastic yes. I knew he would. I hung up the phone and went upstairs to bathe, and change my clothes.
"Well mom, I am off to meet Hojo. I will be home by nine." I said.
"Okay, you have fun, and please, make it clear you love someone else." my mother looked generally concerned.
"I will... See you later!" I called as I walked out the door. It was really cold out, it was a good thing I had bundled up. It wasn't usually this cold in June, it was odd.
"So, that explains everything huh?" I asked with a nervous chuckle.
"I guess so." Hojo looked down at the ground. The park wasn't crowded, which was good, I didn't want a lot of people to be around when I told Hojo my 'deep dark' secret.
"I am sorry Hojo, you are really nice, and under other circumstances you and I would be pretty cool. I don't mean to hurt you." I looked away from him. I didn't know why I was apologizing, I couldn't help who I loved.
"Don't worry Kagome, you can't help who you love," he must have been reading my mind, "it is that Inihashia guy right?" he asked.
"His name is Inuyasha, and yeah it is." I looked back at him, he was sighing deeply.
"He is a demon, isn't he?" Hojo asked calmly, as though he were talking about the color of his hair.
"A demon? What makes you think that?" I asked trying to cover up my nerves.
"Well, the ears for one, but then when I went to shake his hand, I saw claws, even though you tried to cover it up. He is not from around here, and you mysteriously disappeared for days at a time. You are traveling through the well back in time to the land of demons, where you met Inuyasha and fell in love. Now you are trying to keep it quiet so you insist on telling people you are dying and that you love 'someone else' but this person is never named." Hojo finished his theory and my mouth dropped open.
"How in the hell did you figure that out?" I asked in shock.
"Well Kagome, after pining over you for three years, I've learned a lot about you. I watch you go into the well sometimes. I would be coming by just to say 'hi' and you would run into the shrine. If I followed you, you wouldn't be there anymore. The well was the only option. A few times I went down the well, but you weren't there either. So, at first I assumed you were avoiding me. Then I realized that the well must have powers." he concluded again and I thought about it. I guess on some weird level of thinking it made sense.
"You certainly are smart Hojo." I smiled at him and he laughed in his throat.
"Thanks." he stated, almost sarcastically. I looked at my watch and saw that it was 8:45.
"I have to be getting home, my curfew is nine. My mom is still mad about the running away thing." I laughed and began walking home. Hojo followed me and we talked a little more on the way home. He really was a nice kid. I wasn't just being nice to him.
"Good night Kagome." he said as we reached my front door.
"'Night Hojo. Thank you, for everything. For listening to me, for taking me out tonight, and for not hating me." I hugged him gently and walked into my house.
I said good night to my mom, grandpa and Sota. It was a Friday, but I had to wake up early and get to work on making up the school work I had missed these past weeks. There was a lot of it according to Hojo.. He gave me a sheet of paper with everything that we had covered. I put on my pajamas and got into my bed. I tossed and turned, for a good two hours. Why can't I sleep? I thought to myself. I got out of bed and went to my window. I gazed at the shrine and did my best not to think of Inuyasha. "I hope he isn't getting himself into to much trouble." I said out loud. I felt a warm tear roll down my cheek, "Good night Inuyasha." I went back to my bed and cried until I feel asleep.
"I feel you fading away" ~ Kai
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
"Kagome..." I sighed under my breath.
"Why did you lie to me? Didn't you smell Kagome there? I know you were lying Yasha. Just yesterday you were asking me to show you how to love her." Miroku stated, I could see anger in his eyes and for an instant was I was frightened.
"I lied to you because I didn't want to admit it was my fault. I should have known to wait until we were in our time before confessing my love. When I sensed Kagome, I had to make her go home. I was trying to be a good person. She isn't meant to be here, forever," I paused sighing deeply, "with me."
"Maybe she is Inuyasha! Kagome came to this well for a purpose, how do you know that purpose wasn't to be your life mate?" Miroku asked eagerly.
"Because, then she wouldn't have been born 500 years later!" I yelled in retaliation. I was determined to believe that I had done the right thing by making Kagome hate me.
"I see your logic, but I still see my own. I believe that Kagome has a purpose, in our world. Maybe that purpose, is to show you how to let your guard down. To have a family with you ." he emphasized his words, burning them deep into my brain.
I watched my 'friends' sleep as I sat in the hut thinking of ways to prove that I was being the good guy. I could only think of one thing; I was a dumb ass.
Kagome's POV ~~~~
"Kouga! You frightened me." I was breathing heavily, trying to get my heartbeat back down to normal.
"I did not mean to Kagome. I merely heard your yelling and wanted to come and see what was wrong. Have you been crying?" he rushed closer to me, "A girl as gorgeous as you should never ruin her eyes by crying. Tell me what happened." I looked into his eyes and began to cry again. I poured my heart out to him, telling him everything. Every last action, every last word that was spoken.
"Kagome. I am so sorry, you left your pack, uhh family rather? Now Inuyasha doesn't want to be with you? What a tragic night indeed." His words were full of sympathy, normally I would have lied and told him I was fine and that I didn't care, but I did care and I couldn't hide my feelings any longer. I cried into Kouga's strong chest, I cried until I saw the sun coming up over the horizon.
"I have to go. Inuyasha will know that I am still here." I got off the ground and began to walk away when Kouga grabbed my arm.
"Please, you can't be alone in this world. There are beasts whom great demons even fear." Kouga said, I felt him shudder slightly.
"I can't stay here, and I can't go home. What else am I going to do but wander?" I looked into Kouga's eyes and I could see his answer. "Kouga, I can't go with you-"
"Not as my mate. Just as a companion. A friend. I will take care of you until you have a plan and then I will let you go." he paused briefly, "unless you choose to stay." he added.
"That is really very sweet, but-" I couldn't find a reason not to so I gave in, for lack of a better plan, "Okay, thank you. I will be out of your hair in a day or two." I smiled at him and he moved his hand down my arm to place his hand in mine.
At Kouga's den his clan looked at me as though I were lunch, causing me to grab onto Kouga's arm in fear. He smiled at me, I think he liked being a protector. I allowed him to be happy, still holding his arm as we crossed passed dozens of hungry demon wolves.
"They aren't going to eat me are they?" I whispered into Kouga's ear.
"No, they wont. Unless I tell them too. As far as they are concerned, I brought you in so it is my job to decide what is to be done with you." he stated calmly.
"Kouga! Who is this, and, more importantly, can we eat it?" an elderly wolf spoke and I grew some courage letting go of Kouga's arm.
"No you cannot eat me! I will have you know that I am a friend of Kouga's and I will not be eaten by the likes of yo-" Kouga put his hand over my mouth as I tried to yell furthermore at the wolves.
"Oh, she is feisty, that makes them taste sweeter." another wolf said. I was beginning to think Kouga had led me into a trap.
"Please back off! Kagome is my love, no she isn't going to be my mate, but I do love her and no one will eat her unless they want to die!" Kouga screamed at them. I smiled, what a relief.
"Thank you Kouga." I told him.
"Anything for you my love." looking at him from the side, he looked kind of dashing.
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
It has been weeks, and I still can't pick up Kagome's sent. I just know she didn't go through the well. I know she is still here. But where is she?
"Inuyasha, we have to get going, there is rumor of a jewel shard in the next village." Sango looked up to the roof where I was sitting.
"Who cares? Nothing matters."
"But if we don't go, not only will the shard get away, but people will die Inuyasha." Sango said pleadingly.
"So, it isn't Kagome, so who cares?" I continued to look up at the sky. I heard Sango curse as she went back into the hut. Moments later her and Miroku left for the village.
"Inuyasha, it's been a really long time since Kagome has been here. Where is she?" Shippo jumped on the roof and looked at me. No one had told him the truth, we couldn't hurt his little heart.
"I don't know Shippo." I looked down at the little Kitsune. I saw the sadness in his eyes that I felt in my heart. "But I will find her!" I stood up and jumped off the roof.
"Wait Inuyasha, you'll need help!" Shippo said eagerly.
"You stay here. Tell the others what I am doing. I'll get help." As much as I hated to admit it to myself, maybe Kouga could help me. He was fast, and if he knew Kagome was 'missing' he would gladly search, even if it meant teaming up with me.
Morning had just arrived, a red sky was rising. I tried not to think of anything as I ran along the forest. I could smell Kouga everywhere, it seemed as though he had recently been around. I chased his sent toward the old caves, they were suppose to be abandoned. I was almost to the cave when I ran into something. I hadn't been paying attention so I had no idea what I had smashed into. I looked up at the object, and my eyes widened in fear. "No, it can't be..."
Kagome's POV ~~~~
"Kouga, I found an abandoned hut, I've been going there every day, no one lives there. So I am,"
"You are moving out, aren't you?" Kouga looked at me with hurt in his eyes.
"I am sorry, you knew I couldn't stay here forever. I am sorry." I looked away, I couldn't stand his piercing gaze.
"I knew this day would come, true, but I didn't want to believe it." He laughed despite himself. "I love you Kagome. Always know that I am here for you when you need me." Kouga said peacefully.
"Thank you." I ran up to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. I then walked away without looking back.
I found myself walking aimlessly. I didn't know why I left the comfort of Kouga, he provided for me, and he was really nice to me. I knew that he would never leave me or make me feel like I was a rotten person. Then again, he did just want me for a mate so I could breed. I didn't know what to think. I had been lost for weeks. I cried myself to sleep every night, still thinking of Inuyasha. I couldn't get over what he did to me. Maybe I should go home and apologize to my mother? No, she would never accept it. But it was worth a try. After all, I need more clothes, and I missed my grandpa and Sota. I can go to the hut and drop some things off then go home. I miss Miroku, Shippo, and Sango too. I should go see them, maybe I can even see Inuyasha. No I don't want to see him! I found myself at my new home already. I went in to the dusty, dank hut. "Welcome home Kagome." I said out loud. I put down my bag and began to dust. After a few minutes I got bored and decided it was time to face the music with my mother. I grabbed my bag and went to the well.
"Sango, I told you I've tried a hundred times, I don't have any jewel shards so I can't get through the well!" I heard Miroku yelling, he sounded a hundred miles away.
"Miroku! Keep trying, I miss her. I hope she is okay." Sango's frightened voice called back, she sounded closer.
"Sango, maybe we should wait for Inuyasha to get back. He can always get through the well." Miroku said calmly.
"But he is searching for her too, he could be gone days." I heard Sango's voice begin to shake.
"You guys! I've missed you so much!" I ran to the well where they were standing.
"Kagome!" they exclaimed in unison, "We've missed you so much!"
"I missed you guys too! Sorry I scared you!" I hugged them both close. I didn't realize how much they meant to me.
"Where is Shippo and Kirara?" I asked looking around for them.
"Kirara took Shippo to find Inuyasha so we could get him to take us down the well to find you." Sango explained.
"Oh." I stood in silence. "How-" I began, but I couldn't bring myself to ask.
"Inuyasha is devastated. He is so mad at himself that he-" Miroku began to explain but Sango elbowed him in the stomach.
"If he wants to explain that is for him to do." Sango said sternly.
"You are right Sango. Thank you anyway Miroku." I smiled at him.
"So where have you been? We've been looking for you for three weeks!" Sango asked changing the subject. Bless her.
"Oh well, I was living with Kouga." I looked at the ground, nervous they would get the wrong impression.
"Good, I am glad you found a place to stay." Sango said supportively.
"I have my own place now though! Wanna see?" I asked excitedly.
"Sure!" they agreed in unison, sometimes I thought they were sharing a brain.
I took them on the semi-long journey to my new 'house'. They entered and looked around my one room hut. From the empty space, to the last dust-mite.
"I intend to fill it with more stuff. I am going to go home though, and see if I can make up with my mother. If I can then I am going to move back and finish school. If not, then I guess Feudal Japan is my new home." I tried to smile, but I really did want to finish my education.
"Well, we should let you go back. If you want to visit us, you know where we stay." Sango said placing a caring hand on my shoulder.
"Thanks, but I don't think I can bring myself to go to your house. Maybe, we can meet at the well, or meet here sometime." I smiled at them and they nodded their heads to agree. "Well, see you later, I promise, even if I do decide to live there, in my time, I will come back to see you all. Tell Shippo I miss him and sorry for causing him so much pain." I gave another feeble smile.
I walked back to the well, contemplating if I should really leave my friends again. I thought about staying, just to catch a glimpse of Inuyasha, but I couldn't stand it. I wanted to see him, but only so I could tell him he was a jerk. I decided it would be better for my Karma to just leave and never return. I jumped into the blackness.
Inuyasha's POV ~~~~
"What are you doing here! You are not welcome here! Please leave!" I couldn't help myself from freaking out. I didn't know what to do, I thought she had died, again.
"Inuyasha, do you really insist on getting rid of me? After all you have no girl to use as a back up." her words froze me the ground. "Please Inuyasha, I need you with me. You are the only thing that has kept me from going to a peaceful rest."
"Kikyo... I am sorry, I don't love you anymore. I don't think I ever truly did. I am sorry." I was still frozen, but some how I found my voice to be stronger then it was before.
"You love the other girl don't you? The one who is said to be my reincarnation?"
"Kagome. Her name is Kagome. And," suddenly I found my strength, "I love her with every ounce of my heart and soul!" I stood up and took a step towards Kikyo. I didn't want to scare her, but I did want her to leave me alone.
"How could you? She doesn't even love you, just yesterday I saw her with a wolf demon, looking rather cozy in his den." Kikyo smiled, knowing I was getting jealous.
"Kouga..." I muttered under my breath. "I don't care what you say Kikyo! Kagome does love me! And I love her! And I wont give up on her! I don't care if I have to wait the rest of my unnaturally long demon life! I will wait for her!" I barked at her. I couldn't contain my anger, even though I had once loved Kikyo, it was over fifty years ago, and even back then I didn't know if I loved her. We had barely begun to have feelings when we 'betrayed' each other. I am a lot happier with Kagome then I could ever be with Kikyo or had ever been. I had made up my mind, Kagome was the love of my life, and I would not let her go, even if she was from another time. I didn't care. I had to be with her, no matter what it cost. I could use the jewel and become a human for her, and live in her time if she asked me too. For her, I would die, as long as she would be happy.
"Inuyasha..." I couldn't see any emotion in Kikyo's clay body, I felt sorry for her, she didn't deserve to be tortured by having to live as an empty spirit roaming the earth. Maybe one day I would kill her, and allow her to rest.
"I have to go Kikyo. Good bye." I said calmly as I walked by her on my way to Kouga's den. That dirty bastard, if he had violated Kagome, I'd kill him!
Kouga's POV ~~~~
I could sense the mutt from miles away, I had to laugh at the thought of him having a soul and actually looking for Kagome. If that was indeed what he was doing. I noticed he walked into the cave and began pushing people out of the way yelling Kagome's name.
"What do you want mutt?" I asked calmly looking at him with a bored expression.
"Listen here you dirty wolf! Where is Kagome? Hand her over now! She is coming back with me!" Inuyasha was in a bad mood, and I loved watching him get even more angry.
"Oh Kagome, yes she is sleeping. You see we were so busy making love last night, she is still tired even though it is well into the day." I lied to him through an evil smirk. I couldn't help it, I loved toying with his head.
"WHAT!? You... You and her!? Right that makes sense!" he shouted sarcastically. I began to laugh at him as he began to look around all the beds, searching for Kagome. Once I was convinced he had wasted a good deal of energy I broke the news to him.
"Mutt! I was kidding! You are so thick! She moved out this morning. She said she was going to live in a small hut she found somewhere. Maybe even try and move home." I shook my head at him, he was so dumb.
"She moved out! I can pick up here sent then!" he shouted in excitement, "You didn't really..." he made an odd motions with his hands, entwining them and clapping slightly.
"Make love?" I asked, pretending to be naive.
"Yes!" Inuyasha shouted. I smiled, I knew if I lied Kagome would kill me, but if I told him the truth he would make some idiotic comment and try to kill me. I decided I would just stand there and look mysterious for a few moments.
"Well?! Did you!?" he yelled.
"No, we didn't, gods, you stupid mutt!" I yelled, it was obvious Kagome loved him, was he really that dense.
"Okay, I am going to go before I loose her sent." he ran out of the cave, but stopped suddenly, "thanks Kouga." he turned around and disappeared around the cave wall.
"Thanks?"
Kagome's POV ~~~~
On the other side of the well I could hear the end of school bells chime. Well it is the weekend. I thought. I sighed deeply and climbed my way up the well. The shrine still looked the same, did I really expect it to change after three weeks? Yes, I suppose I did. Though, I did see Sota for about an hour every Saturday, but I still expected things to be different. I walked into the house, the first time I had been inside in almost a month. It wasn't any different. If anything, it was exactly the same. I sighed heavily, not knowing what wrath I would get. I walked into the kitchen to see my mother doing dishes. I stood in the doorway and closed me eyes. I opened them and announced my presence.
"Mom," I said in a weak voice.
"Kagome?!" she sounded thrilled, she turned around and dropped the dish she was washing on the floor. "Oh Kagome, I was so worried you had died! I am so sorry, I missed you so much. I am so, so, so sorry." she had run up to me and was now hugging me closely. "I don't care who you date, you were right, Inuyasha is a nice guy, I am so sorry, you can be with him, just please never leave us for so long again. I was so frightened you had been eaten, or if you were still here, I was afraid you had been raped and murdered. I am so sorry, I love you Kagome, you are the best daughter in the world, I love you." she continued to hug me and cry on my shoulder. I held her back tightly, so relieved that she didn't hate me.
"I love you mom, and I am so sorry. You were right about Inuyasha. I should never have chosen him over my own family. I am also sorry that I was going to sleep with him. I don't know what I was thinking. I am sorry mom." I hugged my mother again.
"Oh Kagome, you are old enough to make your own choices I am sorry. If you had slept with him, and told me later, I don't think I would have cared as much. But since I saw you, it kind of made me feel awkward, so I lashed out. I am so sorry sweetheart. What do you mean I was right about Inuyasha?" she began to make tea, and we went into the living room. I told her the whole story about me hearing his conversation with Miroku, and how I lived with Kouga and his clan for three weeks until I found a hut, and that I was afraid she would hate me.
"Oh Kagome, I am so happy you are home. And I've heard you talk about Inuyasha before, I think he was putting up his walls again. I could see in his eyes, he loves you Kagome. Look at the way he tried to kill poor Hojo that day." my mother slightly laughed, "please, Inuyasha needs you. I can tell, he is lonely and scared. He needs a sweet girl like you to make him sit." I laughed with my mother. How could I have ever left her? I knew she would never hate me. Why would I leave? I heard the door open, and I knew it must be Sota.
"Mom, I'm home." I heard him call from the kitchen.
"I'm in the living room with-" I nudged my mom gently and put my finger up to my lips to tell her to be quiet. She nodded and smiled deviously.
"What was that mom?" I saw Sota walk into the room and I jumped out at him,
"SURPRISE!" I screamed happily.
"KAGOME! You are home! You and mom are talking, you made up? Yay my sister!" Sota hugged me closely. I hugged him back, even though I had seen him, it was much more better when I didn't have to do it in secret.
"Where is Grandpa?" I asked looking at my mother.
"He went out for some kind of spell book or something. He insisted it would bring you home." my mother chuckled slightly, but I guess in a weird way it worked.
"I do miss Yasha though." I sighed, sitting back on the couch.
"Why don't you talk to him? It is the weekend, you have two days before school." my mother looked at me and smiled.
"Yeah, I guess. I think I should spend the weekend catching up though, I'll call Hojo and see what I have missed. I think I am going to tell him the whole story too. I feel bad for leaving him in the dark."
"Kagome. I think in this case, it is better he is left in the dark." Sota was sitting on my lap and he looked up at me as he spoke. His eyes looked so big, and playful. He reminded me of Shippo. I missed Shippo.
"Maybe, well I will tell him some stuff. I better go do that though, before he makes other plans." I said looking trying to get up and look for the phone. Sota moved off my legs and I stood up.
"Are you kidding?" my mom called from the living room as I entered the kitchen, "that boy has nothing to do but wait for you. He is obsessed, it isn't healthy really." I laughed at my mothers comment and picked up the phone.
I dialed Hojo's number and waited, he answered on the first ring. I asked him if he would like to get together tonight and we could talk, maybe even see go to dinner or something. He replied immediately with an enthusiastic yes. I knew he would. I hung up the phone and went upstairs to bathe, and change my clothes.
"Well mom, I am off to meet Hojo. I will be home by nine." I said.
"Okay, you have fun, and please, make it clear you love someone else." my mother looked generally concerned.
"I will... See you later!" I called as I walked out the door. It was really cold out, it was a good thing I had bundled up. It wasn't usually this cold in June, it was odd.
"So, that explains everything huh?" I asked with a nervous chuckle.
"I guess so." Hojo looked down at the ground. The park wasn't crowded, which was good, I didn't want a lot of people to be around when I told Hojo my 'deep dark' secret.
"I am sorry Hojo, you are really nice, and under other circumstances you and I would be pretty cool. I don't mean to hurt you." I looked away from him. I didn't know why I was apologizing, I couldn't help who I loved.
"Don't worry Kagome, you can't help who you love," he must have been reading my mind, "it is that Inihashia guy right?" he asked.
"His name is Inuyasha, and yeah it is." I looked back at him, he was sighing deeply.
"He is a demon, isn't he?" Hojo asked calmly, as though he were talking about the color of his hair.
"A demon? What makes you think that?" I asked trying to cover up my nerves.
"Well, the ears for one, but then when I went to shake his hand, I saw claws, even though you tried to cover it up. He is not from around here, and you mysteriously disappeared for days at a time. You are traveling through the well back in time to the land of demons, where you met Inuyasha and fell in love. Now you are trying to keep it quiet so you insist on telling people you are dying and that you love 'someone else' but this person is never named." Hojo finished his theory and my mouth dropped open.
"How in the hell did you figure that out?" I asked in shock.
"Well Kagome, after pining over you for three years, I've learned a lot about you. I watch you go into the well sometimes. I would be coming by just to say 'hi' and you would run into the shrine. If I followed you, you wouldn't be there anymore. The well was the only option. A few times I went down the well, but you weren't there either. So, at first I assumed you were avoiding me. Then I realized that the well must have powers." he concluded again and I thought about it. I guess on some weird level of thinking it made sense.
"You certainly are smart Hojo." I smiled at him and he laughed in his throat.
"Thanks." he stated, almost sarcastically. I looked at my watch and saw that it was 8:45.
"I have to be getting home, my curfew is nine. My mom is still mad about the running away thing." I laughed and began walking home. Hojo followed me and we talked a little more on the way home. He really was a nice kid. I wasn't just being nice to him.
"Good night Kagome." he said as we reached my front door.
"'Night Hojo. Thank you, for everything. For listening to me, for taking me out tonight, and for not hating me." I hugged him gently and walked into my house.
I said good night to my mom, grandpa and Sota. It was a Friday, but I had to wake up early and get to work on making up the school work I had missed these past weeks. There was a lot of it according to Hojo.. He gave me a sheet of paper with everything that we had covered. I put on my pajamas and got into my bed. I tossed and turned, for a good two hours. Why can't I sleep? I thought to myself. I got out of bed and went to my window. I gazed at the shrine and did my best not to think of Inuyasha. "I hope he isn't getting himself into to much trouble." I said out loud. I felt a warm tear roll down my cheek, "Good night Inuyasha." I went back to my bed and cried until I feel asleep.