InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Move Over Oil of Olay ❯ Move Over Oil of Olay ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha; therefore, I do not.I don't own Oil of Olay either.

 

Part III of a tawdry trilogy. This may (or may not) be the last installment, since I'm kinda painting myself into a corner here. I may want to experiment and try something new in the future. Maybe even something longer than a one-shot - gasp! You might (or might not) want to read Allergy Season and Ma & Pa Snafu first. I don't blame you if you don't, but this takes place a few years after the afore mentioned fics and may explain some character idiosyncrasies. And they're short one-shots, it's not like ya gotta read War and Peace.

 

Warning: If you are easily mortified by somewhat kinky sex (nothing way over-the-top), you should back out now. It's not too late. And don't give me any of that happy horse shit about them being OOC. In my little world, they are in a committed, loving and monogamous relationship and they don't blush, dammit! Personally, I think the blushing thing is kinda cute, but they've been mated for a long time in this story, so I think they are past the blushing stage.

 

SplendentGoddess wanted to know where the birthmark was. Hmmm, maybe it will be revealed. Maybe not.

 

I am probably going to hell for this.

 

 

Move OverOil of Olay

 

They were at it again; debating the merits of spermicidal lubricants versus the good old fashioned IUD. A week ago, Kagome laid down the law, insisting that she not get knocked up again for at least fifty or sixty years or so. Training and controlling Inuyasha's little brood was an exhausting venture to say the least.

 

He'd capitulated to her on the IUD, but made sure his mate knew he wasn't thrilled with the idea of anything other than himself being inside her. As usual, his objections were duly noted and overruled. With a heavy sigh, Inuyasha watched his mate go lolloping off for the well and her appointment at the ObGyn's office and redirected his attention to the task of training his yard apes… uh, kids.

 

Kudzu, Hoshiko and Kin, at ages fifteen, fourteen and thirteen respectively, were proving to be quite quick and powerful. Kin even had a bit of his mother's spiritual powers, which came as quite the surprise when he zapped the shit out Jaken one day, much to Sesshomaru and Inuyasha's amusement. Nothin' like the scent of fried toad's legs to brighten your day.

 

Sesshomaru would sometimes pop by to check up on the kids' training and let them take out their aggressions on the imp, just for the hell of it. It wasn't often these days that he could just kick back and enjoy being a prick, but when the opportunity arose, he seized it with gusto. Besides, irritating Inuyasha wasn't as much fun as it once was. Watching his brother's pups do it, on the other hand, was always a great source of free entertainment.

 

The twins, Tomi and Yasuo, at only two years old, were still too young for the rigors of physical training. Their arsenal mainly consisted of snot rockets and poopy bombs. Those two little heathens were entrusted to Sango and Miroku for the day.

 

Occasionally a youkai would show up, apparently too ignorant to read the memo that the jewel was long gone, and an absurdly one-sided fight would ensue. Today was such a day.

 

Two hours into the training session, a rather deformed looking bull youkai showed up. It turned out to be great practice for his three eldest and he let them go to town on the youkai that appeared to be the result of centuries of inbreeding.

 

Kagome appeared at Inuyasha's side, bow and arrows at the ready, having sensed the youkai from the well. She leaned up to whisper in his ear. “Who's the mouth breather?”

 

“Bull youkai. Moron still thinks we have the jewel…”

 

Her incredulous exclamation cut him off. “That's a bull? Sweet jumpin' Jaken, what the hell happened to its lips?”

 

He nudged her affectionately. “And you say I'm mean?” She only snorted her thoughts on that observation. Inuyasha watched as Kagome shifted her bow from hand to hand like a tennis ball, a mannerism he recognized as her pre-I'm-gonna-purify-your-danglies-off gesture. Damn, she's sexy when she's threatening.

 

The couple watched as their children handled the bull effectively. They tensed when the bull made some lewd overtures to their daughter, who turned pale and nearly horked up her lunch at the thought of those lips being anywhere near her. Indeed, those mangled facial protuberances resembled a baboon's ass.

 

Kagome prepared to fire while bitching out the bull. Inuyasha hadn't seen her in a full out bitch fest in a couple of years and it was always such a treat for his libido to see her at it. Shit, she sneezes and I'm horny, she bitches somebody out and I'm horny. Thank Kami she's a freak too.

 

Inuyasha snatched her back against him and pulled her into a reckless kiss. “I'll deal with it if the kids can't. You… naked… bed… five minutes.” With that, he goosed her and sent her on her way, watching as she lollopped back to their home with a devious little grin and her keyed-up scent trailing behind. Damn, she even makes lolloping look sexy. Nobody fucking lollops. Except Kagome. He smiled and shook his head at that thought.

 

Three minutes later, the bull was thoroughly trounced. Inuyasha yelled at the kids to “go play, or something” and took off in hot pursuit of his mate who damn well better be naked and spread-eagled on the bed.

 

Dashing into the bedroom, he found… no Kagome. He could smell her. Boy, could he smell her. That particular scent usually meant she was going to have him for lunch. But where was the wench?

 

The door slid shut behind him. At least she was naked. He waved his hand at the bed with a `well, I'm waiting' look.

 

She laughed. Silly boy, he thinks he's in control. “You took less than five minutes. Let's hope the following events take a little longer, shall we?”

 

He growled and made to grab her. She slipped out of his grasp with slippery ease and giggled. There was some kind of oily stuff all over her, not her regular body oil stuff, but something slick.

 

“It's body butter my love, and I have another little treat for you too. Now strip and go lay down.”

 

He obeyed; he would have been a fool not to. Laying back and slightly propped up by pillows, he watched her, hypnotized, and vaguely noticed some kind of bottle in her hands. He remembered her telling him about that asshole Pavlov and that poor dog he experimented on, and struggled not to drool. He'd be damned if he would help prove that SOB's theory!

 

Crawling up the foot of the futon, Kagome positioned herself so that she was straddling his shins. A flick of her thumb, and the bottle cap clicked open. Stretching forward, she brought the bottle forward so he could take a whiff. “Honey?” She nodded with a small smirk and drew back.

 

Starting at his knees, Kagome drizzled the thick, sweet liquid up each thigh. She squeezed a generous dollop on his testicles, then drew a fine line straight up his erection. The honey was slightly warm and he made a pathetically cute and indeterminate little noise. More was poured on his abdomen, sliding over his ribs, up to his nipples and sternum and finally, his clavicle. He shuddered; all his synapses firing off like a live wire.

 

Then he felt her tongue tracing up from the point where she started. Her teeth joined in with soft nips. Working her way up, Kagome left no surface untended, no special pleasure spot unsuckled. A little of the honey was left behind purposely, though.

 

When she reached his strawberry shaped birthmark, she looked into his eyes and lingered there where the skin was slightly softer than the rest, then followed the curvature up along his tender skin and on to trail up his erection.

 

The wicked look in her eye was reminiscent of a cat lapping up the finest cream she'd ever tasted, not to mention the way her tongue seductively curled back into her mouth. Kagome backed off slightly, only to slither up his body, slowly and torturously. Her slipperiness against the stickiness of the remaining honey was… was… what was the word? Fucking enslaving. Her nipples skimmed his shins, knees, then thighs, until he found himself cozily tucked between her breasts. He jerked and whimpered at the image of himself poking out from her cleavage, while her tongue continued its teasing expedition across his belly, ribs and sternum. She didn't remain there long, just enough to give him a visual worthy of an embolism.

 

She was killing him! And the wench knew it too. He could see it in those sparkling, self-satisfied eyes. After his near embolism experience, Inuyasha thought he'd progressed into stroke stage when her tongue tip flicked out to swipe at his parted lips and curled back before he could even think to capture the instrument of his demise. He could taste the honey from her tongue on his lips. But the real clincher was her grinding her wetness into him, but forestalling entry as she reached for his hand and placed the tips of his fingers against her clavicle and guided them down all the way to her warm, wet femininity. She lifted away from his engorged erection to maneuver his fingers against her, then resettled to her former position as she guided his hand back up to his own lips.

 

Inuyasha was ready to cry, if he wasn't so stinking paralyzed. Kagome stretched forward and traced her tongue over the cartilage of his fuzzy ear and spoke low into it.

 

“I know what you do when you think I'm not looking, Inuyasha. Go ahead, I'm not stopping you. I want to see you do it.”

 

With that, Inuyasha did cry out; a long, moaning and slightly growly wail of the sexually damned. It was music to Kagome's ears.

 

Blushing at being caught, but amazed and even more turned on that she was watching his lascivious display, he proceeded to rub her moisture into his lips, chin and cheeks, then licked the remainder off his fingers. He growled low in pleasure. This was much better than honey. His hips started moving of their own accord, working up to a frenzied pace. He noticed his mate's amused look.

 

“Hey, you have your moisturizer. I have mine,” he muttered defensively, “besides, mine tastes and smells much better than that Oil of Olay crap you use.”

 

Kagome chuckled, but was distracted by his movements and garbled moans. She would never get sick of the sight of his body straining and flexing, or his face contorting in the throes of ecstasy. He was a work of art, sensuality at its best. For now, she had to do something to relieve him, or he'd get grabby, which usually worked out well, but that just didn't factor into her plans.

 

Shifting her hips to align, she bore down on him slowly, knowing he was watching. Once he was fully enveloped, her internal muscles gave him a good, hard squeeze. His eyes squeezed shut and his back arched as he gave an almost shrieking, deep inhalation as his lungs fought for air. “UhhhhoohhhKago…,” trailing off into a growl, was how it came out.

 

Kagome lowered her body to his, letting him feel her body butter sliding over his honeyed-up self as she set the pace. Warm, slippery, a little sticky and completely delicious. She didn't want to imagine what she would have to do to get the sheets clean tomorrow, but that was contemplation for another time.

 

Picking up speed incrementally, Kagome scooped a little honey from his collar bone with her tongue and moved to share it with him. Inuyasha sucked it from her tongue and kissed her breath away, tongues playing a little game of hide-n-seek.

 

He needed her to come soon. His overly sensitized skin couldn't handle much more. Abruptly sitting up, he grabbed her ass with one hand, and pressed her body to his with the other while he ground against her clit. Then he felt it, the spastic squeezing as she mewled and sang his name against his lips. It tripped him right over the edge into perhaps the most intense orgasm he'd ever had. Holding her tightly, he collapsed back, dragging her with him.

 

A few panting minutes later, he rolled her partially under him, one knee between her legs. Caressing and kissing her, tracing her features with fingertips, he sniffed at the array of exotic scents drifting warmly from them both.

 

He loved how the tip of his nose fit perfectly into that delicate, almost non-existent cleft in her chin. Her touch made him feel like the most important person in the world, something that years ago he never would have thought he would have. His bitter and battered heart was purified and made new the day he realized she loved him as much as he loved her. He didn't think it was possible, but Kagome had always found ways to surprise the hell out of him.

 

“You know what I love about you, Kagome?”

 

She smiled and reached up to play with his closest ear. “What, my love?”

 

“Everything”

 

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I tend to turn everything into a joke, it's just my nature, but I wanted to end this on a sweeter note because in the first two parts of this vulgar little trilogy, I focused on how comfortable and playful they were with each other. I didn't want anyone to get the impression that they never communicated exactly what they meant to each other, even if half the time they bury it behind affectionate insults.