InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Of Snowstorms and annoying old women. ❯ Chapter Four ( Chapter 4 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: MysticAngelDust 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 03.17.2008 | Pages: 6 | Words: 8.1K | Visits: 463 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 03.17.2008 | Pages: 6 | Words: 8.1K | Visits: 463 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: Inuyasha is the property of Rumiko Takahashi.
Author's Note: Thank you for the responses. Don't worry, you will see Kagura, Kohaku in this chapter... and you will see Naraku soon enough. I'm actually having a lot of fun with the character Talia, and I hope you guys are enjoying her as well.
Unfortunately this has gone slower than expected, and after struggling with the plot in an attempt to keep the story within my chaper limit... I've decided to just see how many chapters it takes to complete it. I just really don't want to rush anything. After all, you don't go from enemies to lovers overnight.... right?
I'd also like to apologize for the formatting in the previous chapters... I've never been very good at getting these fiction websites to recognize the symbols I use to separate sections... but after some experimenting I think I may have it.
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Chapter Four:
Kagura tapped her fan on her shoulder in annoyance. It had been three days since that stupid human woman of Inuyasha's had thrown herself at the demon lord in the middle of battle, and successfully escaped the wind witch's trap.
At first Kagura believed that she had won. After all they had fallen from the very top of the mountain, and it was very unlikely that either the human girl or the demon lord had survived such a fall. But the wind witch had to be sure. She called upon her feather and had made her way down into the valley in seach of the bodies of the pair in hopes of at least bringing back their corpses to her master as proof of her completed task. She was dissapointed however; when she found no trace of either Kagome or Sesshoumaru in the snow covered valley below. It was the damn snow's fault. It hadn't stopped coming down since the night they had kidnapped Inuyasha's wench, and had successfully covered any trace of the demon lord's escape.
This led her to her current predicament. She had been sitting at the only path leading from the valley for three days with only the lifeless twit of the boy demon exterminator as her companion. Kagura stared down the frozen over pass with a bored expression on her face. She knew they would have to come this way eventually. If they made it very far after escaping their fall anyway. She knew at least one of them had been injured from the blood that had covered Kohaku's weapon after his attack, and it was very possible that at least one of them was already dead from the injuries sustained from the fall. But the wind witch could not return to her master without any proof of her task completed. So she waited, and would do so until the snows ceased and the pass melted. One of them would come through here eventually, and she would be here to greet them when they did.
Kagura sighed as she watched the sun peak over the horizon signaling the start of the fourth day of this wretched mission.
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Talia hummed to herself quietly as she sewed. The snow was falling much harder now, and the temperature had dropped again greatly. She knew that the youkai would be able to withstand these harsh conditions easily even without clothing, but his human companion would not. At least not in the clothing she was currently wearing. It was for that reason that the old woman had dug into one of her many cabinets to retrieve the cloth needed to make clothing suitible enough to wear during the winter months for the young woman currently in her care. The old woman smiled softly. She was happy to have people to care for again after so many years of solitute. It had been many years since any of her children had last visited, and she knew that they were dead by now. Such was the fate of an old woman foolish enough in her youth to dabble in the dark arts.
She had once been a Miko. A powerful Miko, but the life of such a being is riddled with lonliness and sorrow and she soon strayed from her path of purity to that of a normal woman. She married a handsome young man from a village not far from the valley, and they had four daughters and one son. Those were happy days, and the thought of her previous path had all but left her mind until one of her daughters decided to follow the path that Talia had long since abandoned. She knew, as all mothers do, that a time would come when her children would leave. And so they did, one by one, until only she and her husband remained. Sadly, even he left her eventually. So tortured by her lonliness, Talia once again called upon her holy powers. But this time it was not for pure intentions. No, she desired to revive her husband and regain the companionship she so longed for. It was not to be however; and the spell she used to attempt the revival backfired. It would not be until many years later until she realized exactly what she had done.
The years came and went. Her children came to visit less and less often until only her miko daughter traveled the path through the valley to see her mother. Talia knew that her daughter came mainly for the peace that the valley held, and not as much for her mother's companionship. Her child spent many years documenting various miko spells, herbal remedies, and accounts of her travels within the walls of her childhood home; many of which still remain hidden away in the various cabinets around the structure.
It was when her daughter came for the last time that Talia finally realized what she had done in her foolishness so many years before. The woman that was her child approached her home on old and shaky legs, and the mother could sense nearly instantly the death that was beginning to sink into her daughter's aura. But this was not death from illness or injury, this was death from old age. Something that Talia should have suffered from many years before any of her children. It was then that she realized what she had done. In the attempt to revive her dead husband the spell had backfired onto herself, and had altered her own lifespan. She still aged and felt the pain of it more and more as the years went on, but her soul would not leave her body, her organs would not cease to function. She merely lived from day to day now in solitute, and had no concept of how old she was anymore.
It was her struggle through solitude, and her desire for companionship that compelled her to help the young couple that had somehow managed to end up injured within her valley. The young woman's sobs in reaction to the youkai's condition as they lay in the snow struck a cord in her heart that she could not ignore, and Talia was determined to help them find happiness. The woman Kagome was not being very cooperative however; her selfless and pure soul radiated from her body and it was for that reason the old woman knew that Kagome was distancing herself from the demon with no memory. Talia did not know the exact reasons of the girl, guilt perhaps? It did not matter. She could see the determination within the male's eyes as he exited the home several hours prior, and knew that he would not let her go without a fight. It was merely her job to provide him with whatever he needed to accomplish his task.
An almost girlish giggle escaped the old womans lips as the excitement of her task crept into her old bones. She would enjoy this winter more than any she had seen since her youth. Resuming her humming she looked over her work. The second of what she had planned to be four winter yukatas was now complete. She was by no means an expert tailor and the design was nothing more than a simple blue covering, but it would keep the girl warm. She had also been studying the woman's other garments; the pieces of fabric she wore under her clothing as well as the style of stockings the girl wore. It did not take long for the old woman to figure out that the garment on her chest had been much more functional than merely wrapping one's breasts, and the scrap below had been to protect her delicate feminine areas. She would try to recreate these pieces for the girl so that she may feel more comfortable in her stay, although she was sure that she would not be able to recreate the quality of what the girl already had. Mind determined the old woman began her task of recreating these undergarments, all the while humming the same happy tune to herself. She had completed the third chest covering when the demon male finally returned from wherever it was that he had been.
Sesshoumaru entered the home with a dead deer slung over his good shoulder. It had taken him quite some time to find it as most animals had migrated to higher and warmer areas before the snow had begun to fall, but he did finally manage to find this one and slay it. During this time of hunting, killing, and cleaning of the corpse the demon lord thought of nothing but of how he would win the affections of the human female that was currently asleep, and denying any relation to him other than his ward's instructor.
Of course he would start by providing food for her, which will prove that despite his injuries he is still capable of providing for her. After that however; he was not sure of what to do. He understood from both his interaction with the old woman as well as Kagome's scent that they were not of the same species. He was demon of that he knew, but she was not. He understood that human's were physically weaker and shorter lived than that of his own kind, but he did not know how much different courting traditions were from that of his own. It was then that he realized that he did not even remember his own species traditions, but rather was going on instinct alone. He could only hope that these instincts would lead him in the correct direction, otherwise he may be doomed to failure.
Sighing heavily the youkai forced his insecurities into the back of his mind for the time being. Right now he needed to prepare the meat for Kagome to eat, and began to do so by grabbing a wooden plate from beside the fire pit and placing strips of meat on it as he sliced them from the dead animal on the floor in front of him.
"I see your hunt was fruitful Sesshomaru," Talia's voice reached the demon's ears. He had been trying to ignore the annoying female, but it would seem that she refused to be forgotten. When he would not answer her, the old woman eyed the plate he had now set aside in favor of slicing the remainder of the corpse up into more manageable pieces so that it may be preserved for later use. "I'm sure she will enjoy your efforts," the old woman tried again to gain the youkai's attention to no avail. The old woman merely shook her head as he dissappeared out the door once again. He will learn to listen to her eventually.
Having finished his work with the corpse and disposing of the unusable remains far into the forest Sesshoumaru returned into the hut and retrieved the plate that he had prepared for Kagome, but before he was able to enter her room that annoying voice once again broke the silence, "What are you doing?" she asked.
The youkai looked at the old woman as if she had grown a second head, "I am bringing Kagome food so that she may be properly nourished," he responded as if Talia had just asked the stupidest question he had ever heard.
"And you expect her to eat it like that?" Talia replied with no hint of recognition of his tone.
"Why would she not eat the food that I have brought her?" Sesshoumaru was paying attention to her now. The woman was annoying, but if she believed that Kagome would not eat the nourishment that he offered her he wanted to know her reasoning.
"Because it is uncooked."
"What do you mean old woman?"
Talia sighed, "Here let me show you," she said as she stood and took the plate from a now growling demon. She knew that if he were a demon with memories that taking his intended's food from him would have probably resulted in her death, but in his current state she did not feel he would risk harming her. She was his only means of information when it came to Kagome after all. She moved over to the fire and placed the strips of meat one by one on a cooking plate over the fire, turning them as needed in order to make sure they properly cooked, "Human's require their meat cooked over a fire like this," she said while continuing to rotate the meat, "Otherwise they will become ill," she said as she looked over at the demon to gague his response. Her explanation had triggered the desired response as she saw what could only be a look of fear for the girl's wellbeing, but he only nodded as an indication of understanding.
Sesshoumaru watched intently at the method used by the old woman to prepare the meat. He was quite displeased with himself for putting Kagome's wellbeing in danger over something as simple as food, and was determined to not repeat his mistake, "And all of her food must be prepared as such?"
Talia's eyes softened, "No child, only meat. She may want other foods cooked, but that is only preference and not anything that will harm her." Deciding that the meat was now cooked through enough to eat, the old woman placed the meat on a fresh plate and handed it to Sesshoumaru along with a pair of chopsticks. At his questioning stare in the direction of the offered utensils Talia laughed, "She will know how to use them, and be careful to not let her handle the meat while it is
still to hot. Otherwise she will burn herself."
Sesshoumaru only glared at the woman as he took the offered plate and sticks from her. He knew he should probably thank her, but her laughter at his expense was enough to make him decide against it. Quickly he turned and made his way into the room that he and Kagome now shared. The sun had already begun to rise and its rays were filtering in through the window, giving the room a soft glow.
Quietly Sesshoumaru made his way over to Kagome's side and placed the plate on the floor as he sat. She was even more beautiful now than she had been last he saw her hours prior. The evidence of fatigue no longer marred her features, the dark circles that had once adorned her eyes now replaced with fresh pale skin. He could not help himself from tracing one clawed finger down the side of her cheek, ending at her chin and moving back up the side of her face to tuck a strand of loose hair behind her ear. She leaned into his touch as he did this, and the youkai could feel his heart constrict with pride that she had responded as such to his touch. This feeling did not last long however; as the scent of fear and sorrow suddenly began emenating from her still sleeping form.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered in her sleep as a single tear fell from her closed eyes, "Sesshoumaru."
Now his heart was constricting in an entirely different manner, and it was not one that he enjoyed. Even in her sleep her guilt haunted her, and he was beginning to fear that whatever it was that had caused this guilt may have affected her enough that he may never win her back.
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Kagome found herself at the boneater's well. She wasn't sure how she managed to get there, or why it seemed to be in the middle of the summer but right now she didn't care. All that mattered was that she wasn't stuck in a hut in the middle of winter with Sesshoumaru, and that she could go home. As quickly as she could manage, the girl from the future flung her legs over the side of the well and jumped in. But before she was able to hit the bottom a strong hand grabbed her arm and hauled her back out of the well.
"You will not leave me," came a very familiar voice. In fact she knew exactly who the voice belonged to, but she was too afraid to be right to turn around and confirm her fears. The hand that had been holding her by the arm now snaked its way around her waist in order to pull her against a very hard chest, "This Sesshoumaru will not allow you to leave."
Kagome wanted to scream. She was supposed to be going home. Not being embraced by Sesshoumaru and being ordered to stay. Allowing her anger to get the best of her Kagome began to struggle in his grasp so that she could turn around and give him a piece of her mind, but before she could get very far the scenery changed and the demon that had been holding her in a vice grip vanished. In his place, only a few steps away another figure appeared. It was her.
"You should accept his attentions," the copy of herself said in a bored tone. Her hands were placed firmly on her hips with one hip cocked to the side, and a very smug look was on her face, "He isn't going to give up you know, and you're stuck with him for the whole winter."
"Who are you, why do you look like me and where am I!" Kagome screamed at the dopliganger staring her down as if she were nothing more than an insect. It didn't seem to want to end. Every time she turned around her week was just getting worse and worse.
Her other self continued to stare at her the same as before, "I am you, and we are in your mind. You are sleeping."
"So I'm dreaming?"
"If that's what you want to call it, but that isn't what's important."
Kagome let out a frustrated sigh, "I need to wake up. Look, I have no intention of dying just so you can live some sort of fantasy life for a few months." She said to herself. The other her only shook her head before vanishing in the same manner in which she had appeared leaving Kagome in darkness.
"Great, just great. I really need to wake up," she said as she turned around in the dark trying to figure out what to do next. The girl from the future was about to just give up and sit down to wait for her mind to decide to let her wake up when the scene changed again. She was standing in the snow looking over her own unconscious form, which was also laying on a very unconscious and bloody Sesshoumaru. Why was her mind torturing her so? She didn't understand why it wished to torture her with the guilt of causing this mess over and over again. She looked over Sesshoumaru's features as tears began to fall down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry Sesshoumaru," she whispered.
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Kagome woke to the feeling of a hand massaging her scalp lightly. Of course this couldn't be just any hand. It had to be a clawed hand, and Kagome knew exactly who it belonged to. Her other self from her dream was right. He wasn't going to give up, and she wasn't sure how to handle it without ending up dead in the process.
"You are awake," Sesshoumaru said quietly as he continued his minstrations through her hair. The act had seemed to calm her as she slept, and allowed her tears to stop.
'Well I guess there's no hiding from it,' Kagome thought to herself as she slowly cracked one eye open to look at the youkai next to her, "Good morning," she said. It probably wasn't the most intelligent thing she could have said the the lord of the West, but it was the first thing that came to mind and was probably better than trying to jump out of bed to yell at him about touching her.
"It is indeed a good morning," Sesshoumaru said before turning to the almost forgotten plate of food and offering it to her, "You must eat to regain your strength," he insisted.
Kagome looked at the offered food. It appeared to be meat of some kind, and she was more than thankful for it. She couldn't remember how long it had been since she'd last eaten, but from the pain in her stomach she knew it had been at least a few days. Carefully she raised herself into a sitting position, favoring her right arm so that she did not tear the now banaged wound in that shoulder. She took the offered plate of meat and chopsticks from the demon lord and began to eat the still warm food. She had been traveling in the feudal era long enough to know that the meat she was eating was that of a deer, and she didn't remember seeing a dead deer lying around the hut on her way outside the previous day. That of course only meant one thing; that Sesshoumaru had killed it and prepared it for her. "You did this?" she asked tentively, half not wanting to hear the answer she knew would come.
"I did," he replied, his expression unchanging, "Does it please you?" he asked.
The girl from the future continued to eat in silence. She knew that she should respond in some manner, but she knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to make her happy in order to convince her that she belonged to him, and the last thing she wanted to do was encourage him. But her manners wouldn't allow her to just eat and not at least give thanks for the food given to her, "It is good, thank you," she said as she brought the last piece of meat to her mouth while glancing at him through the corner of her eyes. Was he smiling? It was a small smile that barely turned the edges of his mouth upward, but she was sure that it was a smile. If she hadn't been convinced before that Sesshoumaru's mind had been impaired from the fall she was most certainly convinced now. The lord of the Western lands was smiling, and smiling at her.
Sesshoumaru had feared for a moment that she was not pleased by the food when she did not answer him right away, but when she finally thanked him for what he had offered her he could not help the small smile that crept upon his lips. Perhaps not all was lost, and he could still win her affections. He had managed to calm her tears as well as please her with the nourishment he provided for her. Yes, he would convince her that there was nothing to fear. He knew it would be slow, but he would win her back.
"Well it looks like you're doing well child," the old woman's voice was heard from the doorway. She had changed into a new yukata and held a bundle of something in her arms.
"Good morning Talia," Kagome chirped, "I haven't had the chance to thank you for your kindness, I'm not sure how I could ever repay you."
The old woman smiled, "Now dear there is no need for that. I am more than happy to help the two of you recover from your ordeal," she said as she moved further into the room and placed the bundle she had been carrying at the end of Kagome's make shift futon, "If the two of you will be staying with me through the winter you will need more than just torn green fabric to wear, so I made you a few winter yukatas. I also tried to make you several new undergarments and stockings, but I'm afraid they are not of the same quality of the ones that you already have."
Kagome smiled widely as she looked over the clothing that had been offered to her. There were four winter yukatas of blue, red, brown and white along with what looked like four bras, four pairs of underwear, and four pairs of stockings. They were indeed very simple in design, but Kagome was just grateful for the warm clothing and thoughtfullnes that went into making her new underwear. "They're wonderful Talia, thank you!"
Talia only nodded, "Now child let me change your bandages and get you changed," she said before turning to the youkai who had been sitting quietly to the side,
"and you will need to leave while I do so."
Sesshoumaru growled low in his throat, "I will do no such thing," he said, but the look in Kagome's eyes at his statement caused him to reconsider. Bringing himself to his feet the demon lord moved to the opposite side of the room and reseated himself with his back to the two females, "I will remain, but I will not watch." While he desired nothing more than to care for his female himself, he knew that his current situation would not allow him to do so. Not until Kagome accepted him again at least.
The girl from the future fought the urge to giggle at the demon lord's behavior. 'I guess having him want to win me over has some advantages,' she thought. She hadn't missed the way he glaced her way hesitantly as he had declared that he would not leave, or the strange emotion that flashed through his golden orbs when she had sent him a glare that promised death if he didn't do as he was asked. He had gone from a growling dog to a compliant puppy in just a few seconds, and it was just too funny.
As soon as the youkai had taken his seat with his back to them Talia had begun her task of disrobing the young woman and removing the old bandages. To her surprise the wound had healed much faster than she had expected it to, and would most likely be fully healed within a day or two. The old woman had seen this sort of healing ability in only herself and that of her daughter, "You are miko child?" she asked, and when the young woman before her only nodded in response Talia continued her work without another word. 'A miko and a demon. What a curious couple,' she thought to herself as she tied off the fresh bandages and moved to the newly made undergarments in oder to assist Kagome in dressing.
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By the end of the fourth day Inuyasha and his companions were only a few hours away from Kaede's village, and each member of the group were becoming more and more nervous. Each hoped that they would return home to find Kagome well and waiting for them, but deep down they all knew that it was nearly impossible for the young woman to have traveled the distance in this weather on her own. If she were not there when they arrived it would be the longest winter the group had ever faced.
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It had now been a week since Kagome found herself trapped in a snow covered valley with the mighty lord of the West, and she was about to lose her own mind. While the demon lord had said nothing else to her regarding his supposed claim on her, he asserted the opinion just as well though his actions. Every night he slept against the wall only inches from her, during the day he followed her around like a lost puppy, and in all the time inbetween he made sure to do every little thing he could to make her happy. He even tried to converse with her; asking questions about their travels, and about Rin. So far she had been lucky enough that he had not asked how the two of them met, but she was sure that it would be asked eventually. Kagome wasn't sure how much more she could take of this nice Sesshoumaru, and on more than one occasion she came very close to just screaming in his face the entire truth. Surely death was better than having a love sick demon following her around day and night. 'But he doesn't love you,' she thought to herself, 'He only thinks he did before he lost his memory, and is trying to be honerable by accepting you back into his life.' Kagome wasn't sure why, but that thought depressed her. Perhaps it was her own desire for someone to love her.
'You enjoy his attentions,' her mind insisted.
'Oh god not you again, I thought you went away!' Kagome hissed at herself.
'I've been here the whole time, and you're falling right into his trap,' her mind laughed, 'Besides, I think he does love you in some way. Haven't you noticed the way his eyes sparkle when you talk to him?'
Kagome laughed out loud at that, 'You're just as mentally impaired as he is,' she said, but then sobered. She was just as impaired as he was. After all, what mentally stable human being argued with themselves on a regular basis? Something that she had begun to do nearly every moment she was left alone.
It was maddening. The only reprieve she got from Sesshoumaru was when their food ran out and he had to go find more, which due to the current weather conditions took several hours for him to complete. Which was where he was now.
She took the time away from Sesshoumaru to think on her situation, and study the various scrolls Talia had given her to read on miko spells and herbal remedies. Some of which she knew, and many she did not. She was happy to have something to read and keep her mind occupied on something other than a certain overly clingy demon that would soon grace them with his presence.
Talia of course was not doing anything to help her cause. Of course Kagome was grateful for the reading material and the shelter for the winter, the old woman was doing more than necessary to try and help Sesshoumaru along. Even going as far as to try and convince Kagome that he did not blame her for their situation, and that she should stop resisting her 'mate.' It was after the second such conversation with the woman that the girl from the future realized that both the old woman and Sesshoumaru firmly believed that Kagome was trying to push the demon lord away out of guilt over the situation so that he may start over and find a stronger youkai female to be with, and upon this realization Kagome wanted to shake her two companions in an attempt to regain their sanity.
It wasn't that Kagome didn't enjoy the attention. In fact, on more than one occasion she found herself thinking fondly of the youkai lord in ways that she should not. She found herself remembering the feeling of his strong hold on her the first night they were here, and how her heart had fluttered ever so slightly at the declaration of his weakness. She found herself wondering how things would turn out if he never regained his memories, and thought of the possibility of simply accepting his attentions and living 'happily ever after' as her mind had put it once. But she knew that such thoughts were silly. She couldn't simply abandon her quest to gather the Shikon shards or to kill Naraku, and she knew that her friends would eventually find her come spring time. No, running away with a forever memory impaired demon was not an option. And of course there was the possibility that he would regain his memories; her fear no longer was of death, but of the rejection and heart break she would suffer when he did remember his past. If he didn't kill her he would certainly leave, and Kagome knew that she couldn't bear that kind of rejection should she allow herself to accept his attentions now.
It was with these thoughts that Sesshoumaru entered the hut. Under his one arm he held a large wooden bowl filled to the top with strips of deer meat. He had taken to this method of delivering food after discovering Kagome's reaction to one of the deer corpses he had brought into the hut. After seeing the animal's lifeless body, with its empty eyes staring back at her; the girl from the future had quickly turned and emptied her stomach of its contents. Sesshoumaru did not understand the reaction but assumed that in the past he had taken to dismembering their food before presenting it to her, and took the necessary steps to do so from that moment on.
Upon seeing his entry Talia moved over to him and attempted to take the bowl so that she may cook the meat as she had grown accustomed to doing over the past week, but when she grasped the side of the bowl in an attempt to remove it from his arm she was met with a low growl.
"I will prepare the food today woman," Sesshoumaru said coldly. He had allowed this annoying woman to care for his Kagome long enough, and he would begin caring for her properly himself by cooking her food for her. He moved quickly over to the fire and began mimiking the old woman's previous actions of preparing meat for them. The demon lord was pleased with the progress he was having with the young woman he thought of as his own. No longer did she refuse to look at him when they spoke, and the scent of fear and sorrow no longer permiated the air while she slept. She conversed with him as if they were old friends, and while that was not quite what he wanted, it was a start. Each conversation with Kagome left him desiring more and more from the woman, and he now knew how deeply he had cared for her before their current predicament. Not only did she hold beauty, but intelligence and kindness as well. She was selfless to a fault, and even though she fought hard to hide it, he could see the compassion in her eyes when she looked at him when she thought no one was paying attention. She truely was a remarkable female, and he was determined that he would have her as his before the end of winter. When he was finally satisfied that the meat had been cooked enough Sesshoumaru placed enough meat on a fresh plate for Kagome, and then offered it to the young woman.
Kagome was brought from her thoughts of the demon lord and her situation when the smell of food reached her nose. Startled, the girl from the future looked up to find the object of her musings staring at her intently with a plate of freshly cooked meat extended towards her. She hadn't even noticed him come in. Quickly, she sat herself up and took the offered food while giving a polite 'Thank you' as she did. As what had become a tradition in the past week Sesshoumaru only stared at her as she ate. It was as if he was making sure she would eat it all, or that he feared she would throw the food back at him and run away. Kagome sighed, all of this attention was doing a number on her stress levels. What she would give for a soak in a hot bath right now.
"Something troubles you?" came Sesshoumaru's deep voice through the young woman's thoughts.
Shaking her head lightly, "No, I was just wishing for a hot bath is all. It's been over a week since I've bathed and I think I'm starting to stink," she said while scrunching her nose up for emphasis. Of course she wasn't about to tell the demon in front of her that the need to be clean wasn't the only reason she wanted to bathe, and that he was stressing her out to the point of insanity. No, she didn't want to make her own situation worse as she knew that telling him that would only cause him to double his efforts rather than to discourage him.
"There is a hot spring behind the hut," Talia offered, "You are more than welcome to use it, and I have some herbs here that can be ground for cleansing." The old woman had taken to being silent the majority of the time that the girl and the demon were together, and only offered her opinions when she felt it absolutely
necessary. She did not want to hinder their healing process by acting like a nagging mother constantly.
Sesshoumaru nodded, "Very well, I will accompany you to these springs."
"You will not!" Kagome screeched a bit louder than necessary, "My wounds are fully healed now and I don't need help bathing!"
The demon lord cringed slightly at the pain in his ears from her response, "I will not physically assist you in cleaning yourself, and I will turn my back if it pleases you," he offered carefully, not wanting to have her scream again and harm his delicate ears further, "But I will not allow you to exit this home alone."
Throwing her arms in the air in defeat, "Fine!" she huffed as she stood to gather fresh clothing and something to dry herself with from the other room before grabbing the herbs Talia offered a little more forcefully than she had intended and storming out of the hut with the youkai lord following silently behind. By the time they reached the spring the woman from the future had successfully thought of at least a dozen ways to torture a certain demon lord, one of which having something to do with his own rosary and being sat into oblivion. Yes, she would enjoy that a lot.
Turning, Kagome glared at said youkai, "You," she hissed while pointing one delicate finger in his direction, "Back to me, and no peaking!"
Sesshoumaru did as he was told, finding a comfortable seat on a nearby boulder not far from the spring. He had gathered fairly quickly in their time together since the accident that she was extremely modest when it came to her body. Something that he didn't quite understand considering her attire when they had first arrived, which had led him to believe that he was correct in assuming that much of her clothing had been ripped from her body during the battle and he did not in fact allow her to walk around in garments that showed portions of her body that only her mate should be permitted to see. Training his hearing in her direction he could hear her remove her clothing and sink slowly into the warm water, making small sighs and moans as she did so. How he wished she would make such noises in response to his touch, but he knew that now was not the time.
"Why Sesshoumaru," Kagome's gentle voice was heard from the springs behind him after several minutes, "Why do you try so hard for something that was not meant to be?" She couldn't help it. Watching him follow her around over the past week, caring for her, and now his refusal to allow her to leave the hut unattended; it was getting to be a bit much for her to handle and she wasn't sure if she could handle it if he were to continue to act like this the entire winter.
"What is it that you assume is not meant to be?" was his reply.
"You and I," she said
"Why do you continue to insist that we are not meant to be?"
"Because we aren't."
"That is hardly an answer."
Kagome huffed and dunked her head under the water to wet it so that she may apply the cleaning herbs to her hair. Coming back up she thought over what she would say in response, "Look Sesshoumaru, I am human and you are youkai. Isn't that reason enough?" she asked.
"No."
"Why not!"
"Because even through my lack of memory I am aware enough to know that mates are not chosen because of blood, but rather the compatability of two personalities and soul," the demon lord responded cooly, "And even without my memories of our past I am well aware of the effect your presence has on my own soul, and the enjoyment I find from your companionship."
Kagome had been about to rinse her hair of the herbal paste when he had said his last statement, and it had shocked her to the point of nearly drowning herself. Coming up from the water sputtering and coughing she could do little more than stare at the demon lord's back. He had just made two statements that went completely against everything the real youkai lord believed in. First he had declared that the blood she held did not matter, and second he had just told her that he loved her... in his own round about way of course.
"You would do well not to drown yourself Kagome if you do not wish for me to come in after you," Sesshoumaru said with a smirk. Aparently his statement had caught her off guard, "You seem suprised from my words, why?" he asked. He knew that she had been denying him for whatever reason she had for doing so, but he had not expected such genuine suprise from his words of comfort."
Kagome thought for a minute before answering as carefully as possible, "You haven't said anything like that to me before is all," she said, hoping that he would just drop the subject entirely and let her finish her bath in peace.
"Why wouldn't I say such things to you if they are true?" he asked.
She sighed, there was no getting around it now. She would have to tell him the truth about his real self in some form or another, "Because Sesshoumaru, to you blood means everything and you have not spared me or anyone else from being informed of that on a regular basis."
Sesshoumaru took a moment to gague her statement. He could not smell deciet from her as he had when she had declared her relationship to him having been nothing more than his ward's instructor. He knew from the feelings that washed through him while in her presence that she was indeed his match. He did not need memories to tell him that. Perhaps he had such opinions in their distant past, and she was merely using them as a means to distance herself further from him? Or perhaps he was indeed some sort of monster before the accident, and while keeping her around to sooth his soul, he mistreated her into believing that he did not care for her? But then why would she have acted as she did when his life was in danger? This female was making less and less sense as he thought on her, "Whatever I may have said to you in the past it no longer matters," he said. No, whatever it was he had done in the past no longer mattered. He knew what he wanted, and what he wanted was Kagome. His past be damned.
Kagome gave a frustrated grunt, "You are so going to kill me when you get your memories back," she huffed.
"I will do no such thing," the demon insisted.
"Yes you will," Kagome hissed, "You'll get your memories back, realize that I took advantage of you, and then take my head off for it!"
"Hn."
"Yeah, Hn," Kagome sighed before leaning back against a large rock on the side of the spring and closing her eyes. She hadn't meant to say all that she did, but she found that her shoulders felt lighter after getting her fears out in the open. Even if she couldn't get him to understand.
"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru asked after several minutes of silence.
"Yeah?"
"Am I an honerable male?"
'Where did that come from?' Kagome wondered to herself, and without opening her eyes answered, "Yes, you are an honerable person. In fact, you've always prided yourself on your honor."
"Then you have this Sesshoumaru's word that you will not be harmed when my memories return," he said. He would be lying if he said that her fears did not worry him, and he would trust that he had been an honerable youkai and would not go back on his word. Even if it had been given while his memory had been impaired.
Kagome snorted, "Thanks I guess," she said. This was going to be a very very long winter. She could only hope that their conversation here would convince him to back off a bit on trying to claim her.
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I 'm not exactly happy with this... but after going so long without an update this is the best its going to get. Maybe I'll go back and revise it later on down the road. Hope you like it.
Author's Note: Thank you for the responses. Don't worry, you will see Kagura, Kohaku in this chapter... and you will see Naraku soon enough. I'm actually having a lot of fun with the character Talia, and I hope you guys are enjoying her as well.
Unfortunately this has gone slower than expected, and after struggling with the plot in an attempt to keep the story within my chaper limit... I've decided to just see how many chapters it takes to complete it. I just really don't want to rush anything. After all, you don't go from enemies to lovers overnight.... right?
I'd also like to apologize for the formatting in the previous chapters... I've never been very good at getting these fiction websites to recognize the symbols I use to separate sections... but after some experimenting I think I may have it.
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Chapter Four:
Kagura tapped her fan on her shoulder in annoyance. It had been three days since that stupid human woman of Inuyasha's had thrown herself at the demon lord in the middle of battle, and successfully escaped the wind witch's trap.
At first Kagura believed that she had won. After all they had fallen from the very top of the mountain, and it was very unlikely that either the human girl or the demon lord had survived such a fall. But the wind witch had to be sure. She called upon her feather and had made her way down into the valley in seach of the bodies of the pair in hopes of at least bringing back their corpses to her master as proof of her completed task. She was dissapointed however; when she found no trace of either Kagome or Sesshoumaru in the snow covered valley below. It was the damn snow's fault. It hadn't stopped coming down since the night they had kidnapped Inuyasha's wench, and had successfully covered any trace of the demon lord's escape.
This led her to her current predicament. She had been sitting at the only path leading from the valley for three days with only the lifeless twit of the boy demon exterminator as her companion. Kagura stared down the frozen over pass with a bored expression on her face. She knew they would have to come this way eventually. If they made it very far after escaping their fall anyway. She knew at least one of them had been injured from the blood that had covered Kohaku's weapon after his attack, and it was very possible that at least one of them was already dead from the injuries sustained from the fall. But the wind witch could not return to her master without any proof of her task completed. So she waited, and would do so until the snows ceased and the pass melted. One of them would come through here eventually, and she would be here to greet them when they did.
Kagura sighed as she watched the sun peak over the horizon signaling the start of the fourth day of this wretched mission.
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Talia hummed to herself quietly as she sewed. The snow was falling much harder now, and the temperature had dropped again greatly. She knew that the youkai would be able to withstand these harsh conditions easily even without clothing, but his human companion would not. At least not in the clothing she was currently wearing. It was for that reason that the old woman had dug into one of her many cabinets to retrieve the cloth needed to make clothing suitible enough to wear during the winter months for the young woman currently in her care. The old woman smiled softly. She was happy to have people to care for again after so many years of solitute. It had been many years since any of her children had last visited, and she knew that they were dead by now. Such was the fate of an old woman foolish enough in her youth to dabble in the dark arts.
She had once been a Miko. A powerful Miko, but the life of such a being is riddled with lonliness and sorrow and she soon strayed from her path of purity to that of a normal woman. She married a handsome young man from a village not far from the valley, and they had four daughters and one son. Those were happy days, and the thought of her previous path had all but left her mind until one of her daughters decided to follow the path that Talia had long since abandoned. She knew, as all mothers do, that a time would come when her children would leave. And so they did, one by one, until only she and her husband remained. Sadly, even he left her eventually. So tortured by her lonliness, Talia once again called upon her holy powers. But this time it was not for pure intentions. No, she desired to revive her husband and regain the companionship she so longed for. It was not to be however; and the spell she used to attempt the revival backfired. It would not be until many years later until she realized exactly what she had done.
The years came and went. Her children came to visit less and less often until only her miko daughter traveled the path through the valley to see her mother. Talia knew that her daughter came mainly for the peace that the valley held, and not as much for her mother's companionship. Her child spent many years documenting various miko spells, herbal remedies, and accounts of her travels within the walls of her childhood home; many of which still remain hidden away in the various cabinets around the structure.
It was when her daughter came for the last time that Talia finally realized what she had done in her foolishness so many years before. The woman that was her child approached her home on old and shaky legs, and the mother could sense nearly instantly the death that was beginning to sink into her daughter's aura. But this was not death from illness or injury, this was death from old age. Something that Talia should have suffered from many years before any of her children. It was then that she realized what she had done. In the attempt to revive her dead husband the spell had backfired onto herself, and had altered her own lifespan. She still aged and felt the pain of it more and more as the years went on, but her soul would not leave her body, her organs would not cease to function. She merely lived from day to day now in solitute, and had no concept of how old she was anymore.
It was her struggle through solitude, and her desire for companionship that compelled her to help the young couple that had somehow managed to end up injured within her valley. The young woman's sobs in reaction to the youkai's condition as they lay in the snow struck a cord in her heart that she could not ignore, and Talia was determined to help them find happiness. The woman Kagome was not being very cooperative however; her selfless and pure soul radiated from her body and it was for that reason the old woman knew that Kagome was distancing herself from the demon with no memory. Talia did not know the exact reasons of the girl, guilt perhaps? It did not matter. She could see the determination within the male's eyes as he exited the home several hours prior, and knew that he would not let her go without a fight. It was merely her job to provide him with whatever he needed to accomplish his task.
An almost girlish giggle escaped the old womans lips as the excitement of her task crept into her old bones. She would enjoy this winter more than any she had seen since her youth. Resuming her humming she looked over her work. The second of what she had planned to be four winter yukatas was now complete. She was by no means an expert tailor and the design was nothing more than a simple blue covering, but it would keep the girl warm. She had also been studying the woman's other garments; the pieces of fabric she wore under her clothing as well as the style of stockings the girl wore. It did not take long for the old woman to figure out that the garment on her chest had been much more functional than merely wrapping one's breasts, and the scrap below had been to protect her delicate feminine areas. She would try to recreate these pieces for the girl so that she may feel more comfortable in her stay, although she was sure that she would not be able to recreate the quality of what the girl already had. Mind determined the old woman began her task of recreating these undergarments, all the while humming the same happy tune to herself. She had completed the third chest covering when the demon male finally returned from wherever it was that he had been.
Sesshoumaru entered the home with a dead deer slung over his good shoulder. It had taken him quite some time to find it as most animals had migrated to higher and warmer areas before the snow had begun to fall, but he did finally manage to find this one and slay it. During this time of hunting, killing, and cleaning of the corpse the demon lord thought of nothing but of how he would win the affections of the human female that was currently asleep, and denying any relation to him other than his ward's instructor.
Of course he would start by providing food for her, which will prove that despite his injuries he is still capable of providing for her. After that however; he was not sure of what to do. He understood from both his interaction with the old woman as well as Kagome's scent that they were not of the same species. He was demon of that he knew, but she was not. He understood that human's were physically weaker and shorter lived than that of his own kind, but he did not know how much different courting traditions were from that of his own. It was then that he realized that he did not even remember his own species traditions, but rather was going on instinct alone. He could only hope that these instincts would lead him in the correct direction, otherwise he may be doomed to failure.
Sighing heavily the youkai forced his insecurities into the back of his mind for the time being. Right now he needed to prepare the meat for Kagome to eat, and began to do so by grabbing a wooden plate from beside the fire pit and placing strips of meat on it as he sliced them from the dead animal on the floor in front of him.
"I see your hunt was fruitful Sesshomaru," Talia's voice reached the demon's ears. He had been trying to ignore the annoying female, but it would seem that she refused to be forgotten. When he would not answer her, the old woman eyed the plate he had now set aside in favor of slicing the remainder of the corpse up into more manageable pieces so that it may be preserved for later use. "I'm sure she will enjoy your efforts," the old woman tried again to gain the youkai's attention to no avail. The old woman merely shook her head as he dissappeared out the door once again. He will learn to listen to her eventually.
Having finished his work with the corpse and disposing of the unusable remains far into the forest Sesshoumaru returned into the hut and retrieved the plate that he had prepared for Kagome, but before he was able to enter her room that annoying voice once again broke the silence, "What are you doing?" she asked.
The youkai looked at the old woman as if she had grown a second head, "I am bringing Kagome food so that she may be properly nourished," he responded as if Talia had just asked the stupidest question he had ever heard.
"And you expect her to eat it like that?" Talia replied with no hint of recognition of his tone.
"Why would she not eat the food that I have brought her?" Sesshoumaru was paying attention to her now. The woman was annoying, but if she believed that Kagome would not eat the nourishment that he offered her he wanted to know her reasoning.
"Because it is uncooked."
"What do you mean old woman?"
Talia sighed, "Here let me show you," she said as she stood and took the plate from a now growling demon. She knew that if he were a demon with memories that taking his intended's food from him would have probably resulted in her death, but in his current state she did not feel he would risk harming her. She was his only means of information when it came to Kagome after all. She moved over to the fire and placed the strips of meat one by one on a cooking plate over the fire, turning them as needed in order to make sure they properly cooked, "Human's require their meat cooked over a fire like this," she said while continuing to rotate the meat, "Otherwise they will become ill," she said as she looked over at the demon to gague his response. Her explanation had triggered the desired response as she saw what could only be a look of fear for the girl's wellbeing, but he only nodded as an indication of understanding.
Sesshoumaru watched intently at the method used by the old woman to prepare the meat. He was quite displeased with himself for putting Kagome's wellbeing in danger over something as simple as food, and was determined to not repeat his mistake, "And all of her food must be prepared as such?"
Talia's eyes softened, "No child, only meat. She may want other foods cooked, but that is only preference and not anything that will harm her." Deciding that the meat was now cooked through enough to eat, the old woman placed the meat on a fresh plate and handed it to Sesshoumaru along with a pair of chopsticks. At his questioning stare in the direction of the offered utensils Talia laughed, "She will know how to use them, and be careful to not let her handle the meat while it is
still to hot. Otherwise she will burn herself."
Sesshoumaru only glared at the woman as he took the offered plate and sticks from her. He knew he should probably thank her, but her laughter at his expense was enough to make him decide against it. Quickly he turned and made his way into the room that he and Kagome now shared. The sun had already begun to rise and its rays were filtering in through the window, giving the room a soft glow.
Quietly Sesshoumaru made his way over to Kagome's side and placed the plate on the floor as he sat. She was even more beautiful now than she had been last he saw her hours prior. The evidence of fatigue no longer marred her features, the dark circles that had once adorned her eyes now replaced with fresh pale skin. He could not help himself from tracing one clawed finger down the side of her cheek, ending at her chin and moving back up the side of her face to tuck a strand of loose hair behind her ear. She leaned into his touch as he did this, and the youkai could feel his heart constrict with pride that she had responded as such to his touch. This feeling did not last long however; as the scent of fear and sorrow suddenly began emenating from her still sleeping form.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered in her sleep as a single tear fell from her closed eyes, "Sesshoumaru."
Now his heart was constricting in an entirely different manner, and it was not one that he enjoyed. Even in her sleep her guilt haunted her, and he was beginning to fear that whatever it was that had caused this guilt may have affected her enough that he may never win her back.
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Kagome found herself at the boneater's well. She wasn't sure how she managed to get there, or why it seemed to be in the middle of the summer but right now she didn't care. All that mattered was that she wasn't stuck in a hut in the middle of winter with Sesshoumaru, and that she could go home. As quickly as she could manage, the girl from the future flung her legs over the side of the well and jumped in. But before she was able to hit the bottom a strong hand grabbed her arm and hauled her back out of the well.
"You will not leave me," came a very familiar voice. In fact she knew exactly who the voice belonged to, but she was too afraid to be right to turn around and confirm her fears. The hand that had been holding her by the arm now snaked its way around her waist in order to pull her against a very hard chest, "This Sesshoumaru will not allow you to leave."
Kagome wanted to scream. She was supposed to be going home. Not being embraced by Sesshoumaru and being ordered to stay. Allowing her anger to get the best of her Kagome began to struggle in his grasp so that she could turn around and give him a piece of her mind, but before she could get very far the scenery changed and the demon that had been holding her in a vice grip vanished. In his place, only a few steps away another figure appeared. It was her.
"You should accept his attentions," the copy of herself said in a bored tone. Her hands were placed firmly on her hips with one hip cocked to the side, and a very smug look was on her face, "He isn't going to give up you know, and you're stuck with him for the whole winter."
"Who are you, why do you look like me and where am I!" Kagome screamed at the dopliganger staring her down as if she were nothing more than an insect. It didn't seem to want to end. Every time she turned around her week was just getting worse and worse.
Her other self continued to stare at her the same as before, "I am you, and we are in your mind. You are sleeping."
"So I'm dreaming?"
"If that's what you want to call it, but that isn't what's important."
Kagome let out a frustrated sigh, "I need to wake up. Look, I have no intention of dying just so you can live some sort of fantasy life for a few months." She said to herself. The other her only shook her head before vanishing in the same manner in which she had appeared leaving Kagome in darkness.
"Great, just great. I really need to wake up," she said as she turned around in the dark trying to figure out what to do next. The girl from the future was about to just give up and sit down to wait for her mind to decide to let her wake up when the scene changed again. She was standing in the snow looking over her own unconscious form, which was also laying on a very unconscious and bloody Sesshoumaru. Why was her mind torturing her so? She didn't understand why it wished to torture her with the guilt of causing this mess over and over again. She looked over Sesshoumaru's features as tears began to fall down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry Sesshoumaru," she whispered.
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Kagome woke to the feeling of a hand massaging her scalp lightly. Of course this couldn't be just any hand. It had to be a clawed hand, and Kagome knew exactly who it belonged to. Her other self from her dream was right. He wasn't going to give up, and she wasn't sure how to handle it without ending up dead in the process.
"You are awake," Sesshoumaru said quietly as he continued his minstrations through her hair. The act had seemed to calm her as she slept, and allowed her tears to stop.
'Well I guess there's no hiding from it,' Kagome thought to herself as she slowly cracked one eye open to look at the youkai next to her, "Good morning," she said. It probably wasn't the most intelligent thing she could have said the the lord of the West, but it was the first thing that came to mind and was probably better than trying to jump out of bed to yell at him about touching her.
"It is indeed a good morning," Sesshoumaru said before turning to the almost forgotten plate of food and offering it to her, "You must eat to regain your strength," he insisted.
Kagome looked at the offered food. It appeared to be meat of some kind, and she was more than thankful for it. She couldn't remember how long it had been since she'd last eaten, but from the pain in her stomach she knew it had been at least a few days. Carefully she raised herself into a sitting position, favoring her right arm so that she did not tear the now banaged wound in that shoulder. She took the offered plate of meat and chopsticks from the demon lord and began to eat the still warm food. She had been traveling in the feudal era long enough to know that the meat she was eating was that of a deer, and she didn't remember seeing a dead deer lying around the hut on her way outside the previous day. That of course only meant one thing; that Sesshoumaru had killed it and prepared it for her. "You did this?" she asked tentively, half not wanting to hear the answer she knew would come.
"I did," he replied, his expression unchanging, "Does it please you?" he asked.
The girl from the future continued to eat in silence. She knew that she should respond in some manner, but she knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to make her happy in order to convince her that she belonged to him, and the last thing she wanted to do was encourage him. But her manners wouldn't allow her to just eat and not at least give thanks for the food given to her, "It is good, thank you," she said as she brought the last piece of meat to her mouth while glancing at him through the corner of her eyes. Was he smiling? It was a small smile that barely turned the edges of his mouth upward, but she was sure that it was a smile. If she hadn't been convinced before that Sesshoumaru's mind had been impaired from the fall she was most certainly convinced now. The lord of the Western lands was smiling, and smiling at her.
Sesshoumaru had feared for a moment that she was not pleased by the food when she did not answer him right away, but when she finally thanked him for what he had offered her he could not help the small smile that crept upon his lips. Perhaps not all was lost, and he could still win her affections. He had managed to calm her tears as well as please her with the nourishment he provided for her. Yes, he would convince her that there was nothing to fear. He knew it would be slow, but he would win her back.
"Well it looks like you're doing well child," the old woman's voice was heard from the doorway. She had changed into a new yukata and held a bundle of something in her arms.
"Good morning Talia," Kagome chirped, "I haven't had the chance to thank you for your kindness, I'm not sure how I could ever repay you."
The old woman smiled, "Now dear there is no need for that. I am more than happy to help the two of you recover from your ordeal," she said as she moved further into the room and placed the bundle she had been carrying at the end of Kagome's make shift futon, "If the two of you will be staying with me through the winter you will need more than just torn green fabric to wear, so I made you a few winter yukatas. I also tried to make you several new undergarments and stockings, but I'm afraid they are not of the same quality of the ones that you already have."
Kagome smiled widely as she looked over the clothing that had been offered to her. There were four winter yukatas of blue, red, brown and white along with what looked like four bras, four pairs of underwear, and four pairs of stockings. They were indeed very simple in design, but Kagome was just grateful for the warm clothing and thoughtfullnes that went into making her new underwear. "They're wonderful Talia, thank you!"
Talia only nodded, "Now child let me change your bandages and get you changed," she said before turning to the youkai who had been sitting quietly to the side,
"and you will need to leave while I do so."
Sesshoumaru growled low in his throat, "I will do no such thing," he said, but the look in Kagome's eyes at his statement caused him to reconsider. Bringing himself to his feet the demon lord moved to the opposite side of the room and reseated himself with his back to the two females, "I will remain, but I will not watch." While he desired nothing more than to care for his female himself, he knew that his current situation would not allow him to do so. Not until Kagome accepted him again at least.
The girl from the future fought the urge to giggle at the demon lord's behavior. 'I guess having him want to win me over has some advantages,' she thought. She hadn't missed the way he glaced her way hesitantly as he had declared that he would not leave, or the strange emotion that flashed through his golden orbs when she had sent him a glare that promised death if he didn't do as he was asked. He had gone from a growling dog to a compliant puppy in just a few seconds, and it was just too funny.
As soon as the youkai had taken his seat with his back to them Talia had begun her task of disrobing the young woman and removing the old bandages. To her surprise the wound had healed much faster than she had expected it to, and would most likely be fully healed within a day or two. The old woman had seen this sort of healing ability in only herself and that of her daughter, "You are miko child?" she asked, and when the young woman before her only nodded in response Talia continued her work without another word. 'A miko and a demon. What a curious couple,' she thought to herself as she tied off the fresh bandages and moved to the newly made undergarments in oder to assist Kagome in dressing.
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By the end of the fourth day Inuyasha and his companions were only a few hours away from Kaede's village, and each member of the group were becoming more and more nervous. Each hoped that they would return home to find Kagome well and waiting for them, but deep down they all knew that it was nearly impossible for the young woman to have traveled the distance in this weather on her own. If she were not there when they arrived it would be the longest winter the group had ever faced.
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It had now been a week since Kagome found herself trapped in a snow covered valley with the mighty lord of the West, and she was about to lose her own mind. While the demon lord had said nothing else to her regarding his supposed claim on her, he asserted the opinion just as well though his actions. Every night he slept against the wall only inches from her, during the day he followed her around like a lost puppy, and in all the time inbetween he made sure to do every little thing he could to make her happy. He even tried to converse with her; asking questions about their travels, and about Rin. So far she had been lucky enough that he had not asked how the two of them met, but she was sure that it would be asked eventually. Kagome wasn't sure how much more she could take of this nice Sesshoumaru, and on more than one occasion she came very close to just screaming in his face the entire truth. Surely death was better than having a love sick demon following her around day and night. 'But he doesn't love you,' she thought to herself, 'He only thinks he did before he lost his memory, and is trying to be honerable by accepting you back into his life.' Kagome wasn't sure why, but that thought depressed her. Perhaps it was her own desire for someone to love her.
'You enjoy his attentions,' her mind insisted.
'Oh god not you again, I thought you went away!' Kagome hissed at herself.
'I've been here the whole time, and you're falling right into his trap,' her mind laughed, 'Besides, I think he does love you in some way. Haven't you noticed the way his eyes sparkle when you talk to him?'
Kagome laughed out loud at that, 'You're just as mentally impaired as he is,' she said, but then sobered. She was just as impaired as he was. After all, what mentally stable human being argued with themselves on a regular basis? Something that she had begun to do nearly every moment she was left alone.
It was maddening. The only reprieve she got from Sesshoumaru was when their food ran out and he had to go find more, which due to the current weather conditions took several hours for him to complete. Which was where he was now.
She took the time away from Sesshoumaru to think on her situation, and study the various scrolls Talia had given her to read on miko spells and herbal remedies. Some of which she knew, and many she did not. She was happy to have something to read and keep her mind occupied on something other than a certain overly clingy demon that would soon grace them with his presence.
Talia of course was not doing anything to help her cause. Of course Kagome was grateful for the reading material and the shelter for the winter, the old woman was doing more than necessary to try and help Sesshoumaru along. Even going as far as to try and convince Kagome that he did not blame her for their situation, and that she should stop resisting her 'mate.' It was after the second such conversation with the woman that the girl from the future realized that both the old woman and Sesshoumaru firmly believed that Kagome was trying to push the demon lord away out of guilt over the situation so that he may start over and find a stronger youkai female to be with, and upon this realization Kagome wanted to shake her two companions in an attempt to regain their sanity.
It wasn't that Kagome didn't enjoy the attention. In fact, on more than one occasion she found herself thinking fondly of the youkai lord in ways that she should not. She found herself remembering the feeling of his strong hold on her the first night they were here, and how her heart had fluttered ever so slightly at the declaration of his weakness. She found herself wondering how things would turn out if he never regained his memories, and thought of the possibility of simply accepting his attentions and living 'happily ever after' as her mind had put it once. But she knew that such thoughts were silly. She couldn't simply abandon her quest to gather the Shikon shards or to kill Naraku, and she knew that her friends would eventually find her come spring time. No, running away with a forever memory impaired demon was not an option. And of course there was the possibility that he would regain his memories; her fear no longer was of death, but of the rejection and heart break she would suffer when he did remember his past. If he didn't kill her he would certainly leave, and Kagome knew that she couldn't bear that kind of rejection should she allow herself to accept his attentions now.
It was with these thoughts that Sesshoumaru entered the hut. Under his one arm he held a large wooden bowl filled to the top with strips of deer meat. He had taken to this method of delivering food after discovering Kagome's reaction to one of the deer corpses he had brought into the hut. After seeing the animal's lifeless body, with its empty eyes staring back at her; the girl from the future had quickly turned and emptied her stomach of its contents. Sesshoumaru did not understand the reaction but assumed that in the past he had taken to dismembering their food before presenting it to her, and took the necessary steps to do so from that moment on.
Upon seeing his entry Talia moved over to him and attempted to take the bowl so that she may cook the meat as she had grown accustomed to doing over the past week, but when she grasped the side of the bowl in an attempt to remove it from his arm she was met with a low growl.
"I will prepare the food today woman," Sesshoumaru said coldly. He had allowed this annoying woman to care for his Kagome long enough, and he would begin caring for her properly himself by cooking her food for her. He moved quickly over to the fire and began mimiking the old woman's previous actions of preparing meat for them. The demon lord was pleased with the progress he was having with the young woman he thought of as his own. No longer did she refuse to look at him when they spoke, and the scent of fear and sorrow no longer permiated the air while she slept. She conversed with him as if they were old friends, and while that was not quite what he wanted, it was a start. Each conversation with Kagome left him desiring more and more from the woman, and he now knew how deeply he had cared for her before their current predicament. Not only did she hold beauty, but intelligence and kindness as well. She was selfless to a fault, and even though she fought hard to hide it, he could see the compassion in her eyes when she looked at him when she thought no one was paying attention. She truely was a remarkable female, and he was determined that he would have her as his before the end of winter. When he was finally satisfied that the meat had been cooked enough Sesshoumaru placed enough meat on a fresh plate for Kagome, and then offered it to the young woman.
Kagome was brought from her thoughts of the demon lord and her situation when the smell of food reached her nose. Startled, the girl from the future looked up to find the object of her musings staring at her intently with a plate of freshly cooked meat extended towards her. She hadn't even noticed him come in. Quickly, she sat herself up and took the offered food while giving a polite 'Thank you' as she did. As what had become a tradition in the past week Sesshoumaru only stared at her as she ate. It was as if he was making sure she would eat it all, or that he feared she would throw the food back at him and run away. Kagome sighed, all of this attention was doing a number on her stress levels. What she would give for a soak in a hot bath right now.
"Something troubles you?" came Sesshoumaru's deep voice through the young woman's thoughts.
Shaking her head lightly, "No, I was just wishing for a hot bath is all. It's been over a week since I've bathed and I think I'm starting to stink," she said while scrunching her nose up for emphasis. Of course she wasn't about to tell the demon in front of her that the need to be clean wasn't the only reason she wanted to bathe, and that he was stressing her out to the point of insanity. No, she didn't want to make her own situation worse as she knew that telling him that would only cause him to double his efforts rather than to discourage him.
"There is a hot spring behind the hut," Talia offered, "You are more than welcome to use it, and I have some herbs here that can be ground for cleansing." The old woman had taken to being silent the majority of the time that the girl and the demon were together, and only offered her opinions when she felt it absolutely
necessary. She did not want to hinder their healing process by acting like a nagging mother constantly.
Sesshoumaru nodded, "Very well, I will accompany you to these springs."
"You will not!" Kagome screeched a bit louder than necessary, "My wounds are fully healed now and I don't need help bathing!"
The demon lord cringed slightly at the pain in his ears from her response, "I will not physically assist you in cleaning yourself, and I will turn my back if it pleases you," he offered carefully, not wanting to have her scream again and harm his delicate ears further, "But I will not allow you to exit this home alone."
Throwing her arms in the air in defeat, "Fine!" she huffed as she stood to gather fresh clothing and something to dry herself with from the other room before grabbing the herbs Talia offered a little more forcefully than she had intended and storming out of the hut with the youkai lord following silently behind. By the time they reached the spring the woman from the future had successfully thought of at least a dozen ways to torture a certain demon lord, one of which having something to do with his own rosary and being sat into oblivion. Yes, she would enjoy that a lot.
Turning, Kagome glared at said youkai, "You," she hissed while pointing one delicate finger in his direction, "Back to me, and no peaking!"
Sesshoumaru did as he was told, finding a comfortable seat on a nearby boulder not far from the spring. He had gathered fairly quickly in their time together since the accident that she was extremely modest when it came to her body. Something that he didn't quite understand considering her attire when they had first arrived, which had led him to believe that he was correct in assuming that much of her clothing had been ripped from her body during the battle and he did not in fact allow her to walk around in garments that showed portions of her body that only her mate should be permitted to see. Training his hearing in her direction he could hear her remove her clothing and sink slowly into the warm water, making small sighs and moans as she did so. How he wished she would make such noises in response to his touch, but he knew that now was not the time.
"Why Sesshoumaru," Kagome's gentle voice was heard from the springs behind him after several minutes, "Why do you try so hard for something that was not meant to be?" She couldn't help it. Watching him follow her around over the past week, caring for her, and now his refusal to allow her to leave the hut unattended; it was getting to be a bit much for her to handle and she wasn't sure if she could handle it if he were to continue to act like this the entire winter.
"What is it that you assume is not meant to be?" was his reply.
"You and I," she said
"Why do you continue to insist that we are not meant to be?"
"Because we aren't."
"That is hardly an answer."
Kagome huffed and dunked her head under the water to wet it so that she may apply the cleaning herbs to her hair. Coming back up she thought over what she would say in response, "Look Sesshoumaru, I am human and you are youkai. Isn't that reason enough?" she asked.
"No."
"Why not!"
"Because even through my lack of memory I am aware enough to know that mates are not chosen because of blood, but rather the compatability of two personalities and soul," the demon lord responded cooly, "And even without my memories of our past I am well aware of the effect your presence has on my own soul, and the enjoyment I find from your companionship."
Kagome had been about to rinse her hair of the herbal paste when he had said his last statement, and it had shocked her to the point of nearly drowning herself. Coming up from the water sputtering and coughing she could do little more than stare at the demon lord's back. He had just made two statements that went completely against everything the real youkai lord believed in. First he had declared that the blood she held did not matter, and second he had just told her that he loved her... in his own round about way of course.
"You would do well not to drown yourself Kagome if you do not wish for me to come in after you," Sesshoumaru said with a smirk. Aparently his statement had caught her off guard, "You seem suprised from my words, why?" he asked. He knew that she had been denying him for whatever reason she had for doing so, but he had not expected such genuine suprise from his words of comfort."
Kagome thought for a minute before answering as carefully as possible, "You haven't said anything like that to me before is all," she said, hoping that he would just drop the subject entirely and let her finish her bath in peace.
"Why wouldn't I say such things to you if they are true?" he asked.
She sighed, there was no getting around it now. She would have to tell him the truth about his real self in some form or another, "Because Sesshoumaru, to you blood means everything and you have not spared me or anyone else from being informed of that on a regular basis."
Sesshoumaru took a moment to gague her statement. He could not smell deciet from her as he had when she had declared her relationship to him having been nothing more than his ward's instructor. He knew from the feelings that washed through him while in her presence that she was indeed his match. He did not need memories to tell him that. Perhaps he had such opinions in their distant past, and she was merely using them as a means to distance herself further from him? Or perhaps he was indeed some sort of monster before the accident, and while keeping her around to sooth his soul, he mistreated her into believing that he did not care for her? But then why would she have acted as she did when his life was in danger? This female was making less and less sense as he thought on her, "Whatever I may have said to you in the past it no longer matters," he said. No, whatever it was he had done in the past no longer mattered. He knew what he wanted, and what he wanted was Kagome. His past be damned.
Kagome gave a frustrated grunt, "You are so going to kill me when you get your memories back," she huffed.
"I will do no such thing," the demon insisted.
"Yes you will," Kagome hissed, "You'll get your memories back, realize that I took advantage of you, and then take my head off for it!"
"Hn."
"Yeah, Hn," Kagome sighed before leaning back against a large rock on the side of the spring and closing her eyes. She hadn't meant to say all that she did, but she found that her shoulders felt lighter after getting her fears out in the open. Even if she couldn't get him to understand.
"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru asked after several minutes of silence.
"Yeah?"
"Am I an honerable male?"
'Where did that come from?' Kagome wondered to herself, and without opening her eyes answered, "Yes, you are an honerable person. In fact, you've always prided yourself on your honor."
"Then you have this Sesshoumaru's word that you will not be harmed when my memories return," he said. He would be lying if he said that her fears did not worry him, and he would trust that he had been an honerable youkai and would not go back on his word. Even if it had been given while his memory had been impaired.
Kagome snorted, "Thanks I guess," she said. This was going to be a very very long winter. She could only hope that their conversation here would convince him to back off a bit on trying to claim her.
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I 'm not exactly happy with this... but after going so long without an update this is the best its going to get. Maybe I'll go back and revise it later on down the road. Hope you like it.