InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Of Strings and Kevlar ❯ Kagome's Resolution ( Chapter 8 )

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Inuyasha.

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“I can't believe this, Kagome! I love you! Why are you doing this to me?!”

Kagome bit her lip and watched as Hojo slowly broke down in the driver's seat of his car. She had known this was going to be difficult, but never had it occurred to her that he would take it this badly.

Hojo gripped the steering wheel with both hands tightly, his knuckles turning ashen as the first tear rolled down his boyishly smooth cheek. He turned watery eyes toward her, his lower lip trembling as if he were a frightened child. “Kagome, why?”

The girl winced and tried to keep her voice soft and calm. “Hojo, please try to understand. We're going to be a world apart from each other -”

“But that's part of it!” he wailed. “I don't understand why you chose to apply to a school in America! It's like you wanted to be away from me!”

“Hojo, that's just not true!” She placed her hand softly on his forearm, noticing his cringe at the intimate contact as if it pained him. Withdrawing her hand, she tried to reason with the boy. “You know how Okaasan is. She's always been so overprotective and strict with me. I think, for me, this has more to do with getting away from her,” she rationalized.

He sniffled. “But… but you love your okaasan, Kagome.”

“Yes, of course I love her, but….” Kagome sighed and looked at her hands folded in her lap. “I don't know, Hojo. I think I just need to be out on my own, further out of her reach.” Ever since her father had died when she was young, her mother had taken on a completely different attitude toward her and Sota. Of course, she was still the loving mother she always had been, but Kagome's and Sota's freedoms were drastically cut the moment their father had been cremated. Kagome tried to understand that this was a reasonable reaction after losing a husband, but it was stifling nonetheless. And now that Sota was about to be in high school, Kagome wasn't sure how much more he would put up with Okaasan's desperately crushing hold.

Hojo's silence reached Kagome, and she looked at him again to see he seemed to be calming down. His fists were still on the steering wheel, though now he was facing forward with his eyes closed, his head hanging in defeat, but at least he wasn't crying anymore. Not wanting to risk another step back by more physical contact, she resisted the urge to touch his arm again. “Hojo? Are you okay?”

It was then that she noticed how strained the cords in his neck were, the muscles in his jaw clenching repeatedly. Frowning, she leaned forward a bit to look into his face as the streetlight just outside the car shone a soft glow on his features.

“Hojo?”

“….”

Her nerves started jumping, putting her on alert. Something wasn't right. “Please, Hojo. Just tell me you're okay. Please?”

“…You love her.”

Genuinely confused, Kagome leaned forward a little more. “Who?”

His voice was soft and strained, his expression tight. “You love your okaasan. But not me.”

Kagome gave him a puzzled look. “Well, of course I love her. She's my -”

“But you don't love me!” he cried, finally turning to let her see the turmoil on his face. He was definitely not okay. “You've never loved me, Kagome! Why? Why didn't I factor into your decision to apply to a school so far away?”

He was screaming now, and he was making Kagome nervous. She'd never seen him act this way before. “I….”

“Why?!”

Her own lip trembled now as she wracked her brain for a suitable answer to his question. Why had she not thought about her relationship with Hojo? Could it be that she had been subconsciously looking for a way out of it, as well as a means to escape her mother's hold? She hadn't even realized until Hojo pointed it out that he had, in fact, not even been considered in her decision. How could she have been so neglectful?

“Fucking why, Kagome??!!”

She gasped at his outburst as tears streamed down his cheeks, his hold on the steering wheel as tight as ever. Panicking, she blurted out the first thing that came to mind, acutely oblivious to the truth of what she was about to say. “Hojo, I just don't think it would have worked out between us!”

As soon as the words left her lips, she closed her eyes, letting the accuracy of what she had just said wash over her. It was true; she had never felt they would make it past high school. Why was it only now that she was realizing it? She quickly opened her eyes upon hearing his anguished wail.

“Kagome! How could you do this to me? To us?” He gritted his teeth as the sobs shook his body. Finally losing control, he released one hand's grip on the wheel only to slam it back into it violently, rattling the entire dash board of the small car.

Kagome shrieked in surprise, sudden fear tickling her senses. But before she could protest, he hit the steering wheel again, and again. Her heart started pounding as she blindly reached for the door handle, her hand shaking in its quest. “Hojo, please stop!”

“Fuck you!” he cried through his sobs. Refusing to look at her, his repeated slams on the wheel came in more rapid succession until he was frantically beating on it with both hands. He grunted and seethed in obvious rage, his short brown hair whipping about his head as he convulsed. Kagome watched in horror for a second more before whirling in her seat to finally find the door handle.

Struggling with the handle, she had finally unlatched it and had one leg out before she felt a hand painfully gripping her bicep. Screaming out of instinct, she jerked out of his hold and stumbled out of the car, falling and landing painfully on her hip in the driveway.

“No, wait! Kagome, I'm sorry! Come back, please!”

“No!” she shrieked, ignoring the biting pain in her hip as she scrambled to her feet and grabbed her purse out of the seat. “Just leave, Hojo! You're scaring me!”

“Kagome, please!” he whined pitifully, leaning over the center console and reaching out to her. “Don't you realize how much I love you? Please, don't leave me!”

“Go away!” she screamed, her own tears finally stinging in her eyes as she clutched her purse like a lifeline. “Get out of here and don't come back!” Slamming the door, she took a few quick steps toward the house in case he tried to get out and chase her.

But there was no need. As soon as she gave her final command, his eyes widened and glazed over once more. Before she knew it, he was flying out of the driveway and peeling away, leaving only the smell of burnt rubber and deep regret in his wake.

Kagome watched as his car swerved in and out of its lane in its departure, and her heart clenched. God, she hoped he would calm down; who knew what could happen if he kept driving that way through Kyoto. Sighing, she bowed her head and finally let the tears fall as she turned back toward the house….

Kagome awoke with three-year-old tears in her eyes. Lifting her heavy lids to reveal a blurry ceiling above her bed, she closed them again and curled into a ball on her side. Shuddering quietly, she cried for the lost boy who had been taken far too early. She cried for his family, especially his mother, who had held onto Kagome's hand so tightly the day of his wake, unaware that Kagome had been breaking up with the woman's son just before his death. She cried for the time that had passed that would not allow her to forget, as well as the time to come which would surely also not release her from this pain.

Without a doubt, that night had been the worst of her life. She would never forget the despair in his eyes as she screamed at him to leave, nor the way his fists balled up as she stepped away from his car. In that moment, she had broken him, and her resulting guilt was a tangible, monstrous thing.

But crying for him never took away the pain or eased her guilt, and it wouldn't undo what had been done. It wouldn't take back the awful things she said to him, it wouldn't calm him as he drove away too recklessly that night, it wouldn't make him notice the red light that he cruised through in his despair, and it wouldn't stop the adjacent car from slamming into him, thus delivering him from this world. It would do nothing. It was pointless.

Choking back her sobs and pushing the past away, Kagome rubbed her eyes and looked blearily at the clock on her nightstand.

6:56 AM.

She sighed. Yet another night of too much crying and not enough sleep.

She sat up and swung her feet off the bed, the blankets falling to her waist, and rubbed her sore eyes. Last night had been hell, and her nightmare was the icing on the cake. The night had started pleasantly enough at the party at Chimes, but when Koga had shown up, any chance of an enjoyable evening went down the tubes.

Kagome cradled her aching head in her hands as she remembered their discussion in his car, and forced herself to face facts: her feelings for Koga were deteriorating faster than she could keep track of, but she couldn't come up with a logical reason why. Despite his pressures to advance to the bedroom, which admittedly were scarce—and mostly understandable—he had been a faultless boyfriend to her. He was sweet, romantic, and fun. He never forgot her birthday or her eye color, and his eye never wandered.

So why didn't she love him?

It was all she could think about after he had dropped her off last night. Why was it that this man, this wonderful man who so obviously loved her, was not capable of truly winning her heart? Was he not worthy of reciprocation? Had he ever mistreated her? Hadn't he only been good and fair and honest with her?

She groaned, shaking her head in frustration, and stood up. Despite her splitting headache from too much beer at the party, she knew a good run was exactly what she needed to clear her head of these jumbled distractions. Classes were starting on Monday, and she hadn't touched her cello in three days. Then there was the date Koga had mentioned for tonight….

No. Not even that could occupy her thoughts right now. Feeling new determination, she wrenched out her dresser drawer and shuffled through the contents, looking for a sports bra. She needed to focus. She needed to reenergize.

She needed to escape, if only for an hour.

***

Inuyasha lay in his bed with his hands behind his head at seven in the morning, doing exactly what he had been doing for the past six hours: staring at the ceiling and thinking about the scent of Kagome's tears as she left Chimes under the wolf's hand. It was bad enough that he had failed to fall asleep at any point during the night, but the fact that he couldn't get that damn wench out of his head the entire time was enough to make him nuts.

He seethed quietly as he remembered the emotions rolling off Kagome when she had left. He was almost positive she didn't want to leave with Koga, but her scent told him she wasn't frightened; a little nervous maybe, but not frightened. But if what Miroku said was true and she really didn't care for him as much as he probably did for her, then what the fuck was she doing with him?

The story about her high school boyfriend came back to mind, and Inuyasha growled as he continued to stare at the ceiling. If Miroku's suspicions were correct, then Kagome was probably feeling obligated to stay with that mangy wolf out of fear of something like that happening again. He scowled. How the hell did Kagome keep getting mixed up with such losers?

`But aren't I just another one of those losers?'

Fuck that. Inuyasha knew he could be better to her than those other two assholes. All he had to do was prove it to her, but would it really be that easy?

`Feh. We'll find out. Today.'

Swinging his legs over the side of his bed, Inuyasha rose with surprising vigor considering his lack of shut-eye. He felt suddenly energized by his determination to approach Kagome this day, driven to find out how she felt really about him. Now that he knew about her past with Hojo, he would be sure to watch his words so he didn't hit any nerves, but he had to know where he stood with her. `No more games,' he reminded himself. It was time to get real.

Steeling his resolve, Inuyasha pulled off his shirt and threw it in the corner as he made his way to the bathroom. First, a scalding hot shower to wash away the torture of seeing Kagome in tears as she left with Wolf Shit. Then, drive over to her place and….

Wait. Where did she live?

Damn it! He would have to call Miroku, and the gods only knew what fun it would be explaining to him why he needed Kagome's address. Grumbling as he unbuckled his belt, he dropped his jeans and boxers to the floor and kicked them off before turning on the hot water, hoping beyond hope this day would go as smoothly as possible. `I may need a miracle,' he thought dismally as steam began to swirl around him.

***

Kagome panted as she slowed to a walk on the street leading to her apartment. Putting her hands on top of her head and breathing through her nose, she winced at the cramp in her ribcage that had resulted from her being dehydrated. It had been stabbing her insides around her second mile, and then it had returned the last half mile of her run, but she had pushed through it, not finding justification in stopping because of a self-inflicted pain. `That'll teach me not to drink any water after so much beer,' she chided herself.

As her building came into sight, Kagome concentrated on evening out her breathing and taking soft steps. Six miles around campus and back had done much for her tethered soul, weary from conflicting emotions and the stress of not knowing her own heart. Physical exertion was always the way to go in times like these, she had found, and there was none better that she knew of than pounding the pavement.

She was determined to keep all thoughts of Koga or Inuyasha out of her head today. Those two were doing nothing but confusing her, and that was something she simply did not have time to deal with at the moment. In two days, she would begin her senior year, and with it, preparations for her senior recital in the spring. She would sooner face the Angel of Death than be ill prepared for her first lesson of the semester. So with that thought in mind, she absolutely had to make time for the practice room tonight, and if that meant ditching Koga again, then so be it. `There's always tomorrow,' she rationalized, subconsciously thankful for an excuse to cancel their date.

Kagome lowered her arms to her sides upon reaching her building and proceeded to the small lawn to continue her routine. Dropping her head, she grasped her left foot behind her and stretched her quad, concentrating on her breathing as a means of preventing her troubles from entering her thoughts yet again. `No Koga today,' she decided as she went through her stretches. `No Inuyasha,' she continued, her chest feeling oddly tight as his name rang through her thoughts. Shaking her head to clear it as she finished cooling down and ascended the stairs to her apartment, she let out a final cleansing breath and thanked the gods for allowing her nearly sixty minutes of peace.

But as soon as she passed the threshold, thoughts of the evening prior came flooding back as she remembered how she had felt the last time she had entered through this door. The stinging tears of confusion that had cascaded down her face, brought on by feelings for one man and obligation to another. She was no longer in denial of how she felt. Yes, she was painfully aware of the attraction between her and Inuyasha, and also of how that attraction had somehow managed to morph into something so much more, seemingly overnight. More intense, more emotional, more overwhelming, more terrifying… just more.

But her “talk” with Koga in his car the night before had brought back far too many memories of another boy and another car and the tumultuous night that followed, only proving that she could never break up with Koga. Although she was fairly certain he was more mentally sound than Hojo had apparently been, she couldn't risk that Koga wouldn't do something irrational. Yes, he had a good hold on his emotions, the little that she saw of them, but the anger in his eyes last night had unnerved her. She could tell he had been holding back for her sake, and while she appreciated his restraint, she couldn't help but feel a little frightened of exactly what he was hampering. Of course, he had every right to be angry with her, and in all honesty, she had expected much more out of him during their argument. Why didn't he unleash on her after she had so obviously, though unintentionally hurt him? What was he holding back?

What was he capable of?

“Shut the fucking door!”

Kagome jumped at the strained command being shrieked from the lump on the couch, and she quickly shut the door upon realizing that she had, in fact, been standing in the open doorway for at least a few minutes as precious cooled air was overpowered by the sweltering heat outside.

“Sorry!” she sympathized as she kicked off her running shoes and made her way to the couch, where Sango had apparently given up on her trek to her bedroom the night before. She must have missed her lying there on her way out this morning. “Didn't Miroku get you to your bed?”

The girl groaned as she burrowed deeper into the cushions. “I threw him out when we got here. He's such a hentai.”

Kagome suppressed a smile even as she shook her head in disbelief. Leave it to the letch to come on to Sango when she was wasted. Sitting beside her and rubbing her back comfortingly, Kagome sought to ease her cousin's pain. “Do you want some water? Or something to eat?”

Another groan—this one much louder and much more pitiful—sounded from the cushions, and Kagome sighed, taking that as a very hearty “NO.” She continued to rub her back gently, knowing all too well what Sango was feeling at the moment. A familiar memory arose at the thought… Mardi Gras… two and a half years ago… seductive blue eyes….

“Don't touch me. You're gonna make me hurl.”

Pulling back, Kagome stood and shook the stubborn images from her weary mind. “I'm going to go take a shower. I ran a little over six miles this morning, and -”

“Well, congratulations. You're officially perfect. I'll throw you a party later. Now go the hell away.”

She rolled her eyes and draped the throw blanket over her cousin before padding her way to the bathroom.

Closing the door behind her, she turned on the hot water and stripped out of her sweaty clothes as she came to another decision. Koga had been nothing but good to her, despite her emotional distance, and this… this thing with Inuyasha was only proving that she had indeed not been fair to the older youkai. Yes, she had indeed betrayed him, but it sadly went so much further than he even realized. She may have lied to him the night before about the party, but the real betrayal—the one he knew nothing of—was the fact that her heart had been slowly allowing itself to fall piece by piece into the clawed hands of another, all while Koga remained the loyal symbol of faith and love. That was not fair to him, and she needed to try to make it right. Koga deserved a chance; a real chance, and Kagome was now in no place to deny him. Stepping into the hot stream of water, she decided at that moment that she needed to work things out with him. After all he had done for her, he deserved that much.

But there was still the little problem of her attraction to him, or more precisely, her lack thereof. Sure, he was cute, but the animalistic lure she had felt toward him the night she met him had quickly and miserably dissipated the next time she saw him. Then again, he was an amazing kisser, a fact she was sure he knew well. Every time he kissed her, she felt as if she could feel that lure again, that maybe she could develop it over time. Wasn't that worth something?

Kagome forced herself to ignore the outraged protests screaming at her from her heart.

So, set in her new goal of giving Koga a place in her stubborn heart, she tilted her head back and willed the water to wash away her feelings for any other. She had to focus on Koga now—at least when she had time—and make sure there was room for no other man in her life, romantically speaking. Of course, there would always be time for the pervert, as well as her other male friends. But Inuyasha….

She squeezed her eyes shut. No. She couldn't even think his name, lest it crumble her resolve.

Huffing in frustration, she turned her thoughts back to Koga as she grabbed her shampoo bottle. Other than kissing him, which she vowed to do more often, how could she form a sexual attraction to him? There had to be a way to coerce her body to feel some sort of longing for him. An idea came to her then, and she almost dismissed its absurdity. Kagome shook her head, furiously working the shampoo into a thick lather in her hair. `I've finally lost it! Masturbate to Koga? What in the hell would that accomplish?'

On the other hand, it could very well accomplish something. It could plant the seed, and perhaps over time, if she did it more than once, the seed could bloom into something more. But was she really willing to brainwash herself? Was that even possible?

Rinsing her hair, Kagome flushed hotly. Whether it was from embarrassment, the steam from the shower, or the pinpricks of arousal beginning in her center, she couldn't be sure, but was suddenly aware of how hot it was getting in that small bathroom.

`Well… what could it hurt?'

It certainly wasn't as if she had never done it before, but she had never thought of a specific man while doing so. The night she met and danced with Koga had been a turn-on, but it hadn't turned her on the point of sexual stimulation. The only man who had ever come remotely close to igniting any kind of spark in her was….

The way he had touched her fingers, the back of her hand. The way his claws brushed against her fingertips, her palm. The smoldering look of lust and something so dangerous in his eyes….

She coughed and blinked. No, never again must she think of him. She may owe him an explanation for it, but she needed to keep him away now so she could focus on Koga. Koga, who was always so sweet and understanding and loving.

Yes. He was loving. And she was shit.

But not anymore. She nodded resolutely to herself. Now was the time for him to get what he had earned long ago: a real chance. And if she was going to be able to give him one, she would have to try to develop desire for him.

So, with that thought in mind, she slid her hand where it had been lathering soap on her tummy down, very slowly, and blushing comically as she did so. How embarrassing was this? If pressed, she wouldn't even be able to recall the last time she had done this. But drastic times….

Kagome gasped as her fingers wove through the neatly manicured patch of hair covering her sex. The soft water from the shower only made her skin more slippery, facilitating her objective. Swallowing her embarrassment for the time being, she closed her eyes as her fingers slowly pushed between her lips to the button encased beneath. The tip of her middle finger reached it first, causing her to take a sharp breath in as it brushed across the emerging nub. She bit her lip and brushed is softly again, closing her eyes as the little shocks of pleasure tingled up her spine.

`Okay… here I go.'

Kagome swallowed harshly and pictured Koga standing before her, naked in the shower alongside her. Suddenly blushing much more brightly at the thought of his bare body exposed to her, she realized that this was, perhaps, a bit much, so she altered her fantasy to her bedroom, where he was conveniently fully clothed, lying with her on her bed. Relaxing slightly, she continued.

She imagined her fingers were those of Koga and pictured them gently delving further between her folds as she did so herself. His finger lightly swept her clit once more before moving on to her increasingly wet core, softly prodding the slick opening with his index finger. He rubbed there gently, seductively, yet passionately, spreading her moisture along the track of her sex, eliciting another sharp gasp as he came into contact with her swollen clit once again.

Moving back to the source of the wet heat, a finger slowly slipped inside, and Kagome let her head fall back at the relief of the pressure that had been gently mounting there. Slowly it penetrated, gliding through the tight velvet with ease before drawing back and preparing for another go. Kagome's breathing soon grew ragged in response to the pleasure racking her body, moaning softly as she raised her left leg to rest on the lip of the tub to allow those sweet fingers more contact. She moaned at the sheer bliss this sudden ease of access created, her eyes rolling back in her head as she imagined his clawed hand firmly grasping her left breast and massaging it sensuously.

Soon, a second finger joined the first, and her head dropped forward again as the pressure grew again, similar to before, yet so different. The hand at her breast tweaked her nipple lightly, and her jaw dropped open to accommodate her lungs' sudden need for more oxygen. The simultaneous pressures on her breast and in her pussy were becoming entirely too much, and she coaxed the hand below to quicken its movements. His thumb dove to find her clit again as his fingers continued pumping into her with more force, and the hand above was suddenly gone as Kagome reached out to brace herself against the cool tiled shower wall.

“Yes,” she whimpered desperately, begging him to give her the release she was craving in raspy whispers. She could almost feel his hot breath against her neck with the steam of the shower. The claw-tipped thumb carefully moved faster against her clit as his fingers sweetly punished her flower, slowly building the waves of an immense orgasm deep inside her. Whimpering again, she squeezed her eyes tightly shut as those two fingers curled inside her and brushed her G-spot. The fingernails on her left hand clawed helplessly at the tile in front of her as the waves began to crest, and she moaned softly. When his thumb increased its pressure on her clit and his fingers pushed even deeper and harder inside her, her world finally exploded.

The waves of a powerful orgasm crashed against her body, exploding her world in a burst of bright light and pleasure, and she whimpered and gritted her teeth in a feeble attempt to keep Sango from hearing what she was up to. Kagome panted as her imagined lover's hand continued to work her sex like a well-tuned instrument, fingering her body with the practiced ease one would display, such as while he was doing something as simple as twirling a drumstick between his fingers. As her body calmed down from one of the most intense orgasms she had ever experienced, she grinned stupidly and slowly fell forward to lean against the shower wall, imagining it was the much warmer muscled chest of the one who had just granted her such unfathomable pleasure. Smiling more broadly as her eyes remained closed, she took in a deep breath and breathed his name as she relaxed further into his body. “Inuyasha….”

Brown eyes burst open. Jaw dropped. Fingers that were still slowly moving inside her froze. Knees nearly buckled.

`Oh… shit. Shit. SHIT!'

Just as hysterics were beginning to set in but before she could fully analyze the error in her brilliant plan, a soft rap at the door brought her back to the present, and she quickly disentangled herself from her body. “Uh, yeah?”

The door creaked open slightly, but nobody spoke. Puzzled, Kagome was about to call again when a clearly uncomfortable voice reached her ears, the tone of which making her blush all over again. “Um, Kagome? Sorry to interrupt your… shower. But I just wanted to let you know that you have a visitor.”

Slapping her hands over her flaming face, Kagome trembled in shame. It seemed she was not so quiet after all. But just as she was about to try to play off her prior activity, the last part of Sango's dialogue struck her. A visitor? Had Koga actually come to get her already? It wasn't even nine o'clock! And didn't he say he would call first? `Ugh! SO not what I need right now!'

“O-okay,” Kagome stammered, hoping to avoid any further conversation.

“Listen, Kagome -”

“I said okay, Sango! Sheesh, can I have a little privacy, please?” she snapped.

“Kags, I just thought you should know -”

“Just tell him I'll be out in a minute!” Kagome winced at the sharp tone in her own voice, but it couldn't be helped. Why wouldn't Sango just leave her alone?

“Fine,” Sango flared back. “I'll tell him.” And the door slammed shut.

Kagome closed her eyes. Why did she have to take it out on Sango? It wasn't her fault, and she was probably just as embarrassed as Kagome had been at the situation. After all, what was Sango supposed to do? Wait outside the bathroom door and listen to her cousin finger herself to oblivion, not knowing when it would end?

That was when another horrifying thought struck her. `Oh, fuck me! If Koga has been here for at least a minute or two, it's entirely possible he could have heard me, too! Oh, damn, damn, DAMN!!! What now?!'

Growling to herself, Kagome slapped the faucet to turn off the water and threw back the shower curtain, refusing to let herself freak out. There was nothing that could be done about it now. She was going to have to face him and whatever questions he might ask. She grabbed a towel and ran it roughly through her hair in frustration. This would be the last time she did that for a very, very long time.

After drying off, she wrapped her towel over her body and opened the door. She stomped to her bedroom and slammed the door behind her, angrily throwing the wet towel onto her bed. She couldn't even really say at whom she was more angry; Koga or herself. On the one hand, Koga was way too early, even for a phone call, and definitely too early for an unexpected visit. She could only assume that perhaps his faith in her was even more damaged than he had said, and that perhaps he was coming to check up on her, to make sure she wasn't with anybody.

On the other hand, she was the one who had decided it was a good idea to get off in the shower, regardless of whether it was to try to help her relationship with Koga or not. And as delirious as that idea sounded right now, it didn't erase the reality at hand: she had been caught by at least one, possibly two people. `Embarrassed' didn't do her current state of mind justice. `Humiliated beyond belief' was a little closer.

After throwing on the closest pair of shorts she could find, Kagome quickly combed out her hair and tied it in a loose wet braid down her back. She opened a dresser drawer, retrieved the shirt on top and pulled it over her head before looking in the mirror. A blue tank and khaki shorts. She huffed. Good enough.

Turning to look at her closed bedroom door, she took a deep breath and let it out slowly. If Koga had indeed heard her in the shower, this had the possibility of getting very ugly. If he hadn't, then that would be one crisis averted, but they would still have to proceed to the topic of the hour, which would probably be what she wanted to do with him today. At that point, some very clever acting would be required so she didn't immediately come out with, “I want to practice all day and into the night, and unfortunately that doesn't leave time for you. Maybe next week.”

She dropped her head in shame. It looked like she would have to work a little harder on growing closer to him than she had expected. `But aren't I off to a wonderful start?' she mocked herself, sighing heavily.

Raising her head again, she took another deep breath, exhaled, and opened the door to face the firing squad, all the while having no clue that the situation—and the man—she was expecting was going to be entirely different than what she would actually face in mere seconds.

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