InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Patchwork Family ❯ Eyes in Dark, a Kiss, and Reluctant Warnings ( Chapter 26 )

A/N: All Inuyasha characters and references belong to the creator of Inuyasha, Rumiko Takahashi and published by Shogakukan. Any other characters are more than likely my own creation. If I borrow from another story I will do my best to make sure I give credit where credit is due. I will also be pulling some material (direct ideas and inspirations mostly, rather than exact material) from Burn Notice, Scorpion, the Greywalker series, Supernatural, and Lockwood & Co.


Thanks for letting me know what you think, those of you who responded. It’s appreciated. Sorry it’s taking so long between chapters again. Things got crazy with real life. It’s been a rough year. Here’s to hoping for a smoother 2015.

I will look into posting this story also on ff.net but I haven’t used that site in years. I made an account and, at first glance, the user interface looks terribly unhelpful. When I get time I may take another look at it.

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Inuyasha opened his eyes in the dark bedroom, feeling well rested for the first time in longer than he could remember. He just lay there for a minute in the warm bed, trying to figure out what had woken him. He pulled in a deep breath and Kagome’s scent filled his nose. Her scent was a strange mix of rain, raw vanilla, and the faint concrete smell that clung to people who spent their lives in cities. There was also a trace of his sandalwood soap on her, and something about that pleased him. He looked over to see her curled up with her back to him. He squinted at his phone to check the time and had to double check it, unable to believe that it was nearly 11 a.m.

His ears twitched in the dark as he heard something. It was a small, soft sound, but strained, and it came from the young woman next to him. He sat up on one elbow, listening, and it came again. It was something like the beginning of a yell or whimper, or both; but it was as if the sound couldn’t make it out of her mouth, as if her tongue was pressed tightly to her teeth, keeping the noise, and whatever was causing it, inside herself. He whispered her name, but she didn’t wake. The sound came again, and her scent was subtly laced with fear, and the saline smell of tears. Her panic was an uncomfortable buzzing feeling in his head again, surging at the edge of his thoughts.

Inuyasha pulled on her shoulder to turn her onto her back. Her cheeks were wet and her breathing shallow. He couldn’t tell how much of the dampness on her skin was tears and how much was sweat.

“Hey, Kagome…” he called softly.

She still didn’t wake. Her lips were mumbling words he couldn’t make out. When he moved a lock hair away from her face and touched her cheek, she jerked away, her hands pushing out against his chest. Her jaw seemed to come unstuck then and she let out a strangled protest.

He grabbed her flailing hands by the wrists and held them as she tried to move away. If she wriggled much farther, she’d be falling on the floor. “Kagome,” he said, a little louder. “Wake up, you’re alright, come on…”

Blue-gray eyes snapped wide open in the dark and she gasped, jerking away from him, her scent exploding in a wave of absolute terror as she looked up at him. All she saw was a pair of demon eyes, glinting in the dark, a shadowed form leaning over her in the bed. Kagome panted for a second as the eyes watched her. Why was this happening? She’d gotten away! They hadn’t gotten her back, had they? She’d been safe…

“Please…” she almost sobbed, gasping for air. “Please stop hurting me…”

Inuyasha felt something in him snarl in fury at the broken sound of her voice as she begged him. He was so surprised and angry for a moment he couldn’t speak. She repeated herself twice more in quick succession, almost in a manic sort of prayer. “Please stop, please don’t hurt me…”

“Kagome…” he said again, letting her hands go as she continued to panic. Then he realized that she couldn’t see him. The room was almost pitch dark with no windows. She couldn’t see anything, and she’d just woken from a nightmare with a demon leaning over her. He could’ve kicked himself, and tried not to hear the frightened sound she made as he reached across her to turn on the lamp at the bedside table. She closed her eyes at the sudden light, nearly hyperventilating, muscles wound taut.

He lay a hand against her cheek again, wiping away tears and murmuring, “it’s just me. You’re alright.” She cracked her eyes open to look up at him. When she saw the golden eyes, tanned skin, and best of all, the triangular dog ears atop silver-white hair, the monstrous panic began to ease. Her breathing slowed a little and she stuttered out his name.

“Yeah,” he said with relief. “It’s me.”

Now that he thought about it, he was surprised this hadn’t happened sooner. Her eyes moved back and forth over his face, up to his ears, and then back again, almost desperately, as if she was still trying to convince herself it was him and not someone else.

Finally she closed her eyes, her hand coming up to rest on his wrist where his palm still rested against her cheek. A few tears slipped from beneath her closed eyelids and she forced her lungs to relax with huge shuddering sigh. Inuyasha watched her carefully, brows low in a frown as he asked, “better?”

Kagome sniffed once and nodded, opening her eyes, her voice a bit hoarse. “I should probably move to another room; sleep by myself.” His frown deepened. The idea of his presence causing her panic troubled him in a way he wasn’t quite prepared for. Then she added more to the statement, clarifying her position. “You don’t deserve this.”

Inuyasha slid his hand down to curl his fingers with hers over her flat belly. “It’s fine. Well- it’s not… I wish you didn’t have to deal with any of this, but… you shouldn’t have to be alone. I know all about being alone, and trust me- it’s better when you’re not.”

She frowned, licking her lips and taking another deep breath, still calming herself from the height of terror she’d worked herself up to. Kagome looked up at him and he saw something in her face that he couldn’t quite understand; regret… maybe, almost a wanting of sorts. “You need to be able to get some sleep without me waking you up for damage control like this,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.”

Inuyasha closed his eyes and put his forehead against hers for a moment and her words stopped. Her body stiffened against his and he just stayed where he was until she relaxed again, then told her, “I slept better than I have in years. It’s after 11 in the morning. Don’t worry so much. You aren’t quite the inconvenience you think you are.”

Warm breath puffed softly against her face as he spoke, making her skin break out in goose bumps. He inhaled deeply again as he nuzzled her cheek, pressing his lips softly to her temple. Her breathing had changed again and he couldn’t help the faint smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth. He hadn’t been wrong before… she did like him. This time the dart of arousal curling through her scent was, while faint and fragile, couldn’t be mistaken.

His nose was still buried in her long, dark hair, his lips near her ear as he whispered, “is it alright if I kiss you?” He’d never asked a woman if he could kiss her. That sort of thing had never required verbal inquiry before; hell- there usually hadn’t been a lot of verbal communication period. But Kagome’s situation was different, and somewhat precarious. The last thing he wanted was for her to be afraid of him, and she’d been scared so very badly already.

Kagome choked out a soft, nervous laugh and closed her eyes again. Slowly she sighed back, “not really… but I’d like it if you did anyway… I think…”

Inuyasha raised his head enough so he could look at her. Her skin was flushed all the way down her neck and she looked nervous, but not afraid. He bumped her nose with his lightly before he pressed his lips against hers. The kiss was soft, but not hesitant, not unsure in any way. She’d stopped breathing completely, but her body hadn’t gone absolutely rigid, as it had before, when she’d been afraid.

When he withdrew, the emotions shifting across her face were many and varied. She licked her lips again, and the sight of her pink tongue sliding against them was enough to make him almost painfully hard. He was grateful the comforter was bunched between them in such a way that she couldn’t feel it. He studied her face and asked quietly, “still okay?”

She started to answer, but had to clear her throat a little to get sound out. “Ah- yeah… okay… good.”

He let out a low laugh, and Kagome smiled a little. The sound of his voice seemed to rumble through her in a wonderful way. Her eyes fell to his lips again and the way she watched him, he felt safe enough to go in for a second attempt. First, he kissed her cheeks, catching any tears he’d missed before; then he pressed his lips to hers again, and was rewarded as she slowly kissed him back. He deepened the kiss, just a little, and she met him, becoming a little more comfortable.

Her hand slipped out of his and he felt her fingers along his chest, then his neck, sliding over his cheek and into his hair. Her touch was light and slow; as if she wasn’t sure she was allowed to touch him. He longed to let his own hands wander. It was obvious to him now that she wore no bra under her camisole, and it was the first time he’d seen her without a confining sports tank on. Her nipples had hardened unmistakably, pressing against the smooth black cotton.

By the strength of his fear that this fragile moment would be pulled away, he managed to keep from running his fingers over them, instead sliding his warm hand over her side. She loosed a small sigh of appreciation when he flicked his tongue against her lips and he did it again a few times, almost groaning aloud himself as she unconsciously shifted her hips forward a little against the blanket between them.

When she pulled back after a few moments, she was panting for an entirely different reason. Her eyes were shining and the scent of her arousal was almost enough to overwhelm him. He smiled down at her and she laughed softly, her own grin completely free of worry for a change. He raised an eyebrow and she bit her lip, causing another twinge on his side of the crumpled blankets; then she said breathily, “I… um… I didn’t know… it could be like that.”

His brows furrowed again a little. “What do you mean?”

She chewed her lip and her arousal faded almost completely. The change felt like a cold wash of water to his senses as she shrugged her shoulders. He prodded gently, nuzzling her palm as it came down near his cheek, turning his head a little to kiss her fingers before he said, “tell me.”

Kagome looked away and he could see she didn’t want to elaborate, but to his surprise, she did, without him having to pull it out of her. Slowly she admitted, “I never… um… I never had a kiss like that one, or- um….anything more… before…”

Inuyasha felt the beast in his chest come to life snarling again. She’d been a virgin when she’d infiltrated the Anansi, going after the fucking Shikon jewel. How could one little piece of rock be worth such trauma, everything she’d gone through trying to get it back? The demon in him wanted to shred something badly enough that it made his fingers ache, and he did his best to hog-tie the urge. They were making progress and he didn’t want her to withdraw. He ran his hand down her arm, keeping his touch intentionally light.

Her eyes came back to his and she looked uncertain. “Does it bother you?”

He frowned in consternation; of course it bothered him, but he wasn’t sure what she meant exactly. “Which part?”

She continued to chew her lip while he searched her eyes. Finally she added, “kissing someone who-” She broke off, eyes a little damp as she swallowed the lump in her throat and finished her thought. “I feel… a little like messed up leftovers… I guess.” A tear slid down her cheek and her voice was almost non-existent.

Inuyasha gave her hand a squeeze. “I’m kissing a woman who was smart enough to fool him for months, and then brave enough, and strong enough to damn near kill the bastard.”

She laughed a little dubiously and he caught her lips in a kiss again, pressing her more than he had before, desperate for her to know his words were sincere. She kissed him back, hesitant at first, but her need to believe him was just as strong a fuel. A few long moments later, he pulled back a little to let her breath and she looked a bit floored. She pulled herself together and gave him a rueful smile, murmuring, “almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.”

He grunted non-committaly and let his forehead rest against hers again. Quietly, her voice a little pained, she said, “the fact that you’re a fantastic kisser doesn’t change things… no matter how much I…” she cut herself off, swallowing hard and looking away. He frowned down at her for a moment, hesitant to draw the conclusion he found he most wanted.

Did some part of her actually want him that way? Though he’d questioned himself about it earlier, his body pressed against her now, her scent filling his senses, he knew that he did, unequivocally, want her with him for as close to forever as he could manage. This revelation hit him like a slab of concrete before the rest of her unfinished statement sunk in. He looked at her thoughtfully and suggested, “how about we take it one day at a time?”

She frowned, trying to decide whether he was agreeing with her, or disagreeing with her. It looked like it almost caused her physical pain to repeat herself. “We can’t Inuyasha. I’m not-” but he cut her off, pressing his lips against hers again, and she decided, just for this moment, that none of it mattered. Right now, he was kissing her, and it felt like everything inside her rose up to glow brightly in response. These feelings shone light into all the dark corners and chased away the shadows.

Inuyasha did moan now as she slid her hand into his hair again, her fingers finding his ears and rubbing one of them gently. He arched a little over her, rolling his hips against hers once through the blanket. He broke the kiss and closed his eyes tightly for a moment to reign himself in. When he opened his eyes again, she paused. The gold color had deepened dramatically, and the way his gaze sharpened made her uneasy, if just for a moment. He felt the change in her at that same, strange space at his mental borders, and it helped pull him back to earth.

Inuyasha breathed deeply and tried to get some oxygen to his brain, murmuring to her softly, “sorry, you just…. gods Kagome. I swear, I’m not trying to… not that I don’t want…” He trailed off at the change in her expression and fumbled his words, trying to reassure her. “I do want to,” he said with a self-deprecating laugh. He looked down at her and said, “like you wouldn’t believe… I want to.”

Kagome’s cheeks went brilliantly pink, but she was pursing her lips in a smile, nodding her understanding and whispering, “it’s probably best we don’t consider more.”

He laughed, certain parts of him vehemently registering their refusal, and ran his fingers through her hair, thinking to himself, ‘yeah, for now.’

Her expression was thoughtful again and she asked carefully, “if we did… um… you know…” If possible, her cheeks went an even darker red and Inuyasha just grinned at her in amusement. Her eyes caught on his sharp canines for a moment, but this time, she didn’t let it shake her quite so much. Somehow, they frightened her less, after he’d kissed her with so much heat and care. Lamely she finished her question. “What… what would it mean? Not that I’m saying we should… or will … but…”

Inuyasha’s brain was still a little foggy and he had to grab it by its figurative shoulder and shake it, before it caught up with what she was asking him. He almost didn’t dare to hope she might be examining the possibility. Finally he explained seriously, “it would put us at two of three under the mating tie, which is a long term deal.” Though he thought he might want this with her, the thought did still unnerve him a little.

Kagome pondered this a moment before she asked, “how… exactly.. does that work?”

He searched his memory, running his thumb lightly back and forth along her jaw line, where there was still a faint bruise. “There’s blood exchange, then…” he searched for a term that would embarrass her least. “Um… a consummation, and a marking, which is generally done either right after, or during… though it doesn’t have to be. The order isn’t the same for everyone.”

She considered this and he felt compelled to give her more information. If he was ever going to convince her to stay, she was going to need time to work it all out in her head, as well as her heart; so he continued to explain. “Inu yokai are monogamous. A mate bond is powerful stuff. It’s like a human marriage but much stronger, more than just ceremony and a paper contract. There’s a lot to it, but dissolving a joining on that level is almost impossible.”

Inuyasha looked into her eyes for a moment, watching the wheels turn in her head, feeling them turn before he told her, “it’s weird, but I can feel you…” He tapped his own temple once, then stroked her own with his thumb. When she frowned, he tried to explain. “Because of the blood exchange, I can feel you, sort of on the margins of where I’m me. Not all the time, but when you feel something a lot, like when you’re scared.”

Kagome looked at him in surprise, trying to fathom such a thing. Then she searched her own head, looking for anything that might be him. She thought she felt something, a warm sort of tension, but she couldn’t be certain if it was real, or if it was just her imagination. She swallowed hard, her voice unsure. “So… what happens if, down the road, somebody wants a divorce, or has to leave… or dies?”

Something about the idea of Kagome wanting to leave him like that caused a sharp pain in his chest and he said slowly, “it can be done, but it takes years, and both sides have to genuinely have lost any positive feeling for one another. If the couple is incompatible from the start, the mark won’t take in the first place, and the bond is never sealed. Otherwise one or the other, ironically, usually the male, will slowly lose it completely and self-destruct in one way or another.”

Kagome narrowed her eyes a little indignantly. “Why is it ironic that it would be the guy?”

Inuyasha was wise enough now, though it had taken him all of his years to become so, that he sensed a trap, and said carefully, “ah… no reason.” He gave her what he hoped was a charming smile and watched her try not to laugh. She slid her hand over the front of his shirt before she pulled it back to herself, giving him a light smile of her own. “Well, trust me, at this point I’m not sure I’m marriage material anyway, so I don’t think there’s much to think about.”

Inuyasha opened his mouth to make an attempt, however awkward, at correcting her, but she continued. “Besides…” her gaze went a little distant as she looked inward.

“I was trying to tell you... I can’t commit to anything.” Her eyes refocused on his and a sad smile came back to the surface. “I think… you’re a great guy. Part of me wants to find out what this is, what it would be like, but I’ve got no idea what’s going to happen next, or how any of this will end. Even without the issue of the Shikon no Tama, and him…”

She found she didn’t want to say Naraku’s name, didn’t want the sound of it to soil the comfort that surrounded them at the moment. She sighed softly and let herself toy with a lock of his silver hair that hung over his shoulder, wrapping it around her finger. It was easier to talk to her hands than to look at him while she admitted, “I come with a lot of moving pieces that aren’t going to make anyone’s life any easier. It’s… hard to explain.”

Kagome didn’t know for sure how her business with the spiritual layer of the world would affect a relationship. She’d never really had the nerve to even try after the short and uncomfortable weirdness that was her single attempt at a boyfriend in high school. How could she hope for a guy to understand something so strange, which was such a large part of how she perceived her world, when he couldn’t even see most of it? When she saw Inuyasha frown, her breath shuddered a little again as her emotions, and several years of conviction that she would just have to be alone with the Grey, built in her chest and she said roughly, “I can’t…”

Inuyasha dropped a soft kiss on her temple again, whispering against her skin. “I know. I’m not asking for anything more than what you can deal with right now. If that’s friends, then we’ll call it friends. Let’s just take everything one day at a time, minute to minute, if you need.”

Her muscles relaxed where they’d been winding tight again and she sighed, “thank you.” Privately she wondered how many minutes she had. Even if she was able to wrap her head around a commitment to this half demon man, if her dying would do to him what he’d described, it would be pure selfishness on her part unless her business with the jewel had been resolved, and she’d come out the other end of it alive.

Even then, there was the work her grandfather had left her. While it wasn’t always dangerous, it more than she could ask most people to able to handle in the long term. And that was if they didn’t think she was a lunatic as she tried to explain it to them in the first place. The spirits of the Gray, the whispers of the Dead Space would follow her until the day she too passed on. How did one explain to a potential boyfriend that it was her job to run a beat of sorts, helping those of the dead who needed it, and dealing with those who caused problems?

A loud grumbling broke the silence and Kagome made a sound of disbelief. “I think I actually felt that!” She patted a hand lightly against Inuyasha’s stomach and he grinned. “Friends also eat breakfast.”

She laughed and cried out in surprise when he pressed another kiss to her lips. At the conflicted look she gave him, he said, “friends can kiss too, if they want.” Kagome couldn’t help the wry smile- as she did want, more than she ever could have imagined. It was hard to tell him no. Inuyasha rolled out of bed carefully. He made a point of keeping his back to her as he grabbed some clothes out of the chair and held them strategically in front of himself to cover the raging hard-on he was sporting. “I’m gonna jump through a shower, then we’ll get some chow.”

He let his eyes rest on her just one moment more, lying in his blankets, before he directed himself forcefully toward the bathroom. The water would have to be cold; very, very… very cold.

After he left the room, Kagome lay there, hand pressed to her slightly swollen lips, and tried to chase the doubts away from the warm fuzzy feeling inside her. She’d thought for sure she would never want to be within a dozen yards of a man, human or demon, ever again. But Inuyasha was something special. The idea of getting that close to any other guy still repelled her to varying degrees, but not Inuyasha. He made the slimy, cold feeling in her heart go away, at least for a while.

Curious about the time, she picked up Inuyasha’s phone and saw he had a text message from Gabriel. The screen openly read, ‘here at the garage waiting for you. Send heads up if u want me to take care of her, but u know shes fussy about who touches her like that.’

Kagome nearly choked. What the hell did that mean? Surely not… Not that she would have a right to be upset if he was seeing someone, or several someones for that matter. Hadn’t she just gotten done telling him she couldn’t… wouldn’t… be anything more than friends? Still, something about the thought hurt after the way he’d just held her and kissed her. Maybe it didn’t mean as much to him. To her, it had felt as if it nearly shifted her whole horizon line a few degrees. Maybe he kissed on women like that all the time. What would she know?