InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Ready, Set, SHAVE! ❯ Judging of Legs: Part 1 ( Chapter 3 )

Disclaimer: I don't own Inu Yasha and co., but I do own this story idea!

Ready, Set, SHAVE!

Chapter 3: The Judging of Legs, Part 1

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Kouga was stared at the two brothers fighting. (Inu Yasha recovered, forgot to tell y'all!) Looking over to Kagome, he whooped, which got Inu Yasha's attention. Grabbing Kagome, he said to Kouga, "Get another woman!"

Kagome blushed, and looked over to Kikyo, who was glowering at her. She shivered at the cold look. 'I wonder how Inu Yasha ever fell in love with her!'

After Naraku came back to the land of the living, Kagura walked out. Jumping onto the table, she showed off her legs. Smooth and white! The judges ooo-ed and ahh-ed, marveling her legs. Naraku smirked. "Well," he started, "what do you expect? She's my offspring!"

"What'd you use, Kagura?" Miroku asked.

"Well, slicing winds! What do you expect?" she said, getting out her fan.

It was looking bad for the other contestants when suddenly, the sharp eyes of Kagome spotted a tiny spot of, could it be? RAZOR BURN! Quickly she jumped on a rock. "LOOK CLOSLY! SHE HAS RAZOR BURN!" she yelled.

Everyone gasped. Sesshoumaru took one look and almost fainted.

Naraku's face grew dark. "Kagura," he said with a very scary voice, "explain yourself!"

Kagura whimpered and began to tremble with fear. "Well, Naraku-sama, when you created me, you were in a hurry to destroy a town and thus, made my winds a little too strong and violent!"

Naraku HMPHed and walked away sulking, to Kagura's great relief.

Next was Sango. She raised her leg onto the table right in front of Miroku. She batted her eyelashes at him. Miroku just about past out, but no one cares, of course! (Hides from Miroku fans) Sango raised her leg a little higher. She had very smooth legs, no cuts, and no sign of razor burn. Kikyo and Kagome sucked in breaths, not being able to control their envy.

Sango smirked and started talking. "I used all natural herbs for a light scent and the smooth bones of a centipede demon for an extra close shave. I think the smoothest legs are here, don't you agree guys?

The judges quietly murmured with each other.

"You have to admit, she has the smoothest legs we've seen in a long time!" Miroku whispered.

"I like the nice natural smell!" Sesshoumaru said as he breathed in.

"You're right!" Kouga and Naraku both said at the same time.

"She could be the winner!"

Shippo suddenly comes in their little 'huddle'. "I'm bored. Let me do something."

"Uhhhh, okay? You can be the announcer," Inu Yasha said, not craving a whole temper tantrum.

Shippo nodded. "Okay. What do I do?"

"Well, you can start with telling the ladies that the next contestant can come on up!" Miroku said as he grinned.

Shippo jumped on a rock. Instantly, Kikyo and Kagura started to say, "AWWWWWW!"

Shippo looked pleased with himself and did a cute little pose. Inu Yasha, however, did not think him so cute. He threw a rock, which made Shippo rub his cute, little cheek in pain.

Kikyo nudged Kagome's shoulder. "Who is he?" she asked enviously.

"He's my little Shippo. We, meaning INU YASHA and me, rescued him!" Kagome said, paying extra attention to say Inu Yasha's name a little louder.

Kikyo glared. "Okay," she said, reaching for her purse, "how much do you want for him?"

Kagome looked outraged. "What? He's not for sale! Besides, I can't use ANCIENT money!"

Kikyo growled. "How's $50? In AMERICAN money!" (A/N: I don't really know about yen and stuff, so I have other ways…)

Kagome looked thoughtful, but Kagura, who had been listening, had other ideas. "What? It's outrageous to sell such a cute little animal for just $50! I pay $60!"

Kikyo glared at Kagura. "Fine! Make it $65!"

Kagome was watching with amazed eyes. She flipped out her auction hat and blow horn. "Okay! I have $65! $65! Going once-"

"Make it $75!" Kagura yelled.

"$85!" Kikyo screamed.

"Okay, I have an offer at $85!" Kagome was really going!

"$100!" Rin suddenly yelled.

Everyone stared at the little girl, who was standing on Jaken.

"What?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"Please, Sesshoumaru-sama! Can I please have him! You promised me a puppy dog a long time ago but Jaken said that you were just saying that so I could shut up. PUH-lease?" she begged.

Sesshoumaru looked thoughtful. "Well…"

"CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO THE CONTEST? I HAVE A YOGA LESSON IN AN HOUR!" Naraku yelled.

Silence. Absolutely golden silence.

Then…

Laughter. Bright, happy, rib-breaking laughter.

Everyone cracked up. The guys ('cept for Naraku, of course!) fell to the ground, clutching their stomachs and throwing their heads back. The ladies did a bit better. They tried to contain themselves. Sango and Kagome fell into unlady-like heaps. Kaede started laughing like Santa Claus, ho, ho, ho-ing. Kikyo was a little better. She giggled and tried very hard not to die (again!) right there. Kagura, fearing Naraku's wrath, didn't laugh, but stared at the ground. When she finally lifted her head, one look at her Naraku-sama and she started to grin. She tried hard, determined to make a week without punishment. But at last, the poor wind-demon couldn't stop herself, and she, too, threw back her had and laughed.

Naraku stood there, extremely angry with everyone. He glared at the guys (who didn't see him). Finally, he himself couldn't contain his anger. He blew up, like a volcano, and started yelling. "WHAT'S SO FUNNY? I DON'T THING IT'S FUNNY AT ALL! MY THERAPIST SAID THAT YOGA WOULD HELP LIGHTEN MY TEMPER, BUT NOW I KNOW THAT HE'S A FRICKIN' LIAR!" He ran off to cry in a corner.

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GRRRRRRR! I could have had this chapter up by last Wednesday, but my phone lines went dead. You see, in California, we have a rainy season and this old tree just happened to crash over our phone lines, making sure I couldn't go online OR call anyone. Sad, I know! I mean, when our phone lines got fixed today, I checked my e-mail accounts and in just one of them, I had like, 44 new e-mails!

Liked the chapter? Give me the love. *^_^*

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