InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Ready, Set, SHAVE! ❯ The Shocking Results ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: Ahem… is this mike on? Can you all hear me? *bobs her mike* Okay, I'm only going to say this once. I don't own Inu Yasha, but I'm working on it!

Ready, Set, SHAVE!

Chapter 5: The Shocking Results

Author's Note:

Hi everyone? Did you all have a good Thanksgiving Break? I sorta-kinda did. It was good if you count watching men trying to hump each other (my version of football, no offence to anyone who likes it) all day. Anyway, thanks for all the reviews! I loved them, and surprisingly, I didn't have any flames! Not that I would care… Everyone, read Romance Blooms, by my friend KawaiiFryingPanChick, okay? Thanks! I want to all of you that this ficcy is not going to be long. Maybe 5 more chapters, with an epilogue and a parody chapter included. Yes, I want to tell everyone that if the parody chapter scares people, don't worry! Enjoy the chapter and review.

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"Wel l, duh, Kagura!" Kagome yelled.

"Stop fighting, you guys! My ears hurt!" Shippo screamed.

"We're so sorry, Shippo-chan!" Kagome said, rushing over.

"We really are, you cute little thing!" Kikyo purred, pushing Kagome aside.

"Aww. We really hurt your little ears, didn't we?" Kagura said, sounding very motherly.

Rin had different ideas. "Well, if you don't want to stay here, leave! I'll help! You're so much more alive when I'm chasing you!"

"EEP!" Shippo runs.

"Well, it's time you boys judged! Have fun and if I don't win, I'll hurt someone!" Kagome said happily.

The judged huddled together. When they were done talking, Inu Yasha rose.

"We would like you all to show us your legs again, except for you, Kaede-baba. We saw enough of you to know that we can't handle the sight!"

The girls nodded and paraded in front of the judges, showing off their legs to the fullest intent.

Shippo, by now, had returned, gasping and out of breath.

"T-the judges w-will now anonymously vote, please wait," Shippo fainted.

Kagome, Kikyo, and Kagura rushed to his side and tended him.

When the voting was all done, Shippo, who had awakened, counted them.

"One for Kagome." Kagome beamed.

"One for Sango." Sango blushed.

"One for Kikyo."

"Another for Kagome."

"And another for Kikyo."

"WHAT?!" Kagome suddenly realized. "Me and her are tied?! Impossible!"

"Her?! My mere reincarnation?!" Kikyo yelled.

"Uhh… What were we supposed to do when there was a tie?" Shippo asked.

"See them-" Miroku was banged on the head by Sango.

"Don't even think about it," she growled, leaning over his death-like body.

"How about a cat-fight?" suggested Naraku. "You know, with miko powers? They both have them!"

"That's not fair! She can suck my soul out!" Kikyo protested.

"Well, you stole it!"

"It was my soul to begin with!"

"Sorry, sister, but you DIED! REMEMBER? Or is your ancient brain too duffed to think clearly?"

"Why you little-"

"Now, now, ladies! We mustn't get rough!" Miroku called. "You'll ruin your natural beauty!"

Death glares from Kikyo, Kagome, and Sango.

"How about a shaving contest? You know, I'll conjure up some hairy legs, and you guys can try to shave them as smoothly and quickly as you can?" Naraku suggested.

"Yeah! That would work!" Sesshoumaru said.

"But Naraku, why'd you ever learn how to make womanly legs?" Inu Yasha asked, curious.

"Well, how do you think I made Kagura and Kanna (Kanna's the little white girl who's made of nothingness. She's the sister of Kagura and offspring of Naraku)?"

"Good point… But then you know all about a woman's…?"

Every lady there blushed.

"Naraku, you are a sick minded fool!" Kikyo said.

"Ugh! No wonder you had to have offspring with yourself!" Kagome followed.

"I never liked you, but this is just too much!" Sango said, glaring.

"It's not my fault!" Naraku whimpered. "I had to!"

"No, you DIDN'T!" all three of them accused.

"But I needed that Shikon Shard!"

"Oh, did you…?"

Miroku jumped out of nowhere. "Hey, Ladies Kagome and Kikyo, shouldn't you be getting ready?"

"Oh yeah…" Kagome realized. "Naraku, get ready to conjure, while I get my razor!"

"Yes, ma'am!" he said as he clicked his heels together.

Kagome and Kikyo grabbed their razors and shaving cream. This time, however, Kikyo didn't bring her Nair.

Naraku started waving his arms around like a lunatic.

"Uh, Naraku? Are you conjuring or just waving her arms around like a lunatic?" Miroku timidly asked.

"Stupid, stupid bug! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Naraku replied. He clapped his hands together. "HAHA! YOU IS DEAD, LITTLE BUG! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" he cackled.

Kaede looked strangely afraid. "Okay, young people, stay back… We don't want the lunatic getting us, now do we!"

"Okay, I'm sane again." Naraku said. Everyone still looked at him weird. This time, he really did wave his hands around and muttered strange words. Two blobs took shape into… EXTREMELY HAIRY, but womanly legs!

When Sesshoumaru saw the legs, he fainted. Rin ran and dumped water on him. Sesshoumaru woke up and started yelling that the sky was falling and Chicken Licken was still alive. Everyone backed away slowly.

"We better get started, people!" Naraku yelled.

"Are you two ladies ready?" Shippo asked.

Kikyo and Kagome raised their razors and shaving cream. "READY!" they yelled.

"GO!"

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Okay everyone! Review… NOW! I know this was a short chapter, but the next one will be VERY long and very funny. Besides, it was a REALLY fast update for me! What, I updated in two days? Anyway, I had to stop here… to make you all mad! HAHAHA! Not to worry, I have a fourth of it done already. It's called, "Final Showdown". (I love serious titles and funky chapters! :p) It'll probably be up next Saturday or Sunday… Well, until next time, ja ne!

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Responses to Reviews:

Kei*la hime: YAY! Another person actually likes this fic! Hope you liked Chapter 4!

Sorena27: Thankies! I'm sorry I toke so long! It's hard to write on the computer when your parents hog it all day!

Rin281: That's my job, gurl! To be scary… Too bad I don't get payed!

Slice: You think it's funny, too?! Thank you, thank you!

Youkai Luna Sakura: I'm glad I could cheer you and your friends up! Thanks for risking your bus driver's wrath to laugh about this ficcy!

ArtemisMoon: My friends like to go to import stores to buy Inu Yasha books that are in Chinese, which I can read. They also get the translations online so I know what's going on and stuff! I love your ficcy, by the way! You have to write more!

Edom: Thanks! GO KAGOME! Oops… Did I just give something away there?

Foureyedbookworm: Hey! I haven't heard from you since… a long time ago! How are you doing! I love your stories and I'm glad I was number 1 reviewer this time!

JaRule'sBoricuaBaby: Cool screen name! Thanks for liking an insane person's work!

Moo-Moo-chan: I love cows. My friends know that sometime, at the end of every one of my sentences, I say moo. It's really fun. Moo. Great, you got me started again. Moo. Oh well, Moo. I like your ranking style! Moo!

Lovely moonlight maiden: I'll finish it, don't you worry! I'll e-mail you when I update!

KFPC: Girl… You're nuts. Not that I care, 'cuz I am too! Toasters are evil… One burnt me when I stuck my hand in it. (TW: Well, that was smart! Me: Shuddup! I was really hungry!) I dunno… maybe Shell stations do sell toasters… Who knows these days!