InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Reflected Past ❯ Adjustments ( Chapter 12 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter Twelve - Adjustments


She followed along in the near pitch blackness, guided by the tall white form that walked ahead, his steps as sure as if it had been broad daylight. Jaken trudged not far behind her. He was always easy to spot; his bright yellow eyes glowed out from the darkness every time she looked behind her. Even if there had been moonlight available to them, Rin doubted she would have been able to find it useful, so thickly had the trees above them grown together. A heavy black blanket of branches and leaves hung overhead, making it seem as though they were wandering through an endless tunnel.

Rin had been quick to realize that it would take a while to recondition herself to Sesshoumaru’s way of life. No longer was she accustomed to sleeping outside or wandering the forests incessantly. As a small child, that issue had been resolved by the presence of Ah-Un, who had served as protector, transportation, and often, a mobile bed, one that her sore muscles were beginning to longingly recall. But she would not complain; it was for her to keep up with him. With Jaken around to complain about her, the issue of her human frailties seemed always to be at the forefront of anything that came out of his mouth. The little jerk, she thought, annoyed. Now it was easy to remember why she had so often harassed him when she had been a child.

Thinking back to those times, she wondered over the reasons that had brought Sesshoumaru to the decision to allow her to travel with him. At the time she had not viewed herself as a burden, but now she did not doubt that that was precisely what she had been. An eight-year-old human child was no match for the stamina of an adult demon. She had held him up, slowed him down, likely bothered him greatly, and had required nothing short of several rescues from him and Jaken.

She looked up at him from a few steps behind, watching as he walked steadfastly ahead of her. He had never failed her, never said a harsh word, and had always been unbelievably patient with her. It was strange reconciling those fond memories with the new things she was seeing in him now.

And she did see him differently. Rin recognized that he was, without a doubt, a very dangerous being, one who radiated a threatening aura, something that she really had not seen in him as a child. Certainly she had witnessed no shortage of bloodshed wrought by him, but she had never questioned it, her mindset having been that whatever Sesshoumaru-sama did was right, and good, and above reproach. Now as she recalled that day long ago when she had happened upon him injured in the forest, she considered herself very lucky that it had been him she had found instead of another demon with, perhaps, more of a homicidal tendency toward little human girls. It was scary how completely devoid of fear she had been.

Now it was perhaps easier to see the flaws; there was a darkness to him that she had never realized before. This observation did not provoke fear in her; she was certain that harm would never come to her from him, but it did make her believe that perhaps she had not known him as well as she always thought she had. Even so, she decided, it did not matter. The qualities she had admired in him as a young girl were still there ... now, though, she recognized the things about him that brought fear to the eyes of his opponents, the qualities that made Jaken cower with barely a glance. Rin couldn’t help but wonder if anyone really did know him at all ...

These thoughts did not dim her view of him. If anything they made her curious about this man she had always viewed with such childish adoration, and made her resolve to know him better. Quickening her steps, she moved to walk beside him, practically having to take two steps for every one of his. He looked at her as she drew up alongside him, likely expecting her to say something.

"Yes?" he finally inquired.

"I just thought I'd walk with you,” she answered lightly.

Upon hearing this, she noticed that he slowed his steps visibly to more easily accommodate hers. They walked on in silence for a while, Rin's mind searching for something to talk about. There were many things she wanted to ask, but somehow she was unable to gather the nerve. He is intimidating, she thought, glancing quickly up at his impassive profile. How easily she had always chattered at him before…

A brilliant flash of lightning split the sky overhead, brightly enough to light their path even through the heavy leaves. Sesshoumaru did not break his stride as he peered up into the leafy canopy above them, but it was not long before rain began to descend, falling through the branches to splatter on their uncovered heads. Rin shielded her eyes as a driving wind picked up, rushing around the tree trunks to send sharp daggers of water into her face. Behind her, she could hear Jaken grumble something unintelligible as he, too, bent his head against the sudden storm.

Sesshoumaru paused then, internally debating what to do. Under normal circumstances such weather would not faze him, but having a human in tow once more changed the situation. Rin and her kind were not built to withstand much in the way of violent weather. As the thought crossed his mind, a sizzling electric current rent the air, sending a warning down his spine. It proved to be a precursor to the lightning strike that suddenly shot down from the dark skies above to ignite a tree just ahead of them.

Rin jumped from the sudden explosion and even Jaken gave a squawk of surprise. Reflexively, Sesshoumaru reached out to grip her arm, dragging her out of the way as scorched tree limbs crashed down to the muddy ground not far from where they had been standing. The smell of burnt wood choked the air as he altered their course and moved closer to the hillside at the edge of the forest, searching for some sort of shelter to wait out what was looking to be a vicious early summer storm. Rin trailed after him, her heartbeat’s attempt at pacing itself back to normal audible to his ears.

By the time he located something suitable, which was little more than a rocky outcropping hovering over damp, weed-infested earth, all three were drenched to the skin, water pooling off of their fingertips and clothing. As an irritated Jaken paused to wring the water out of his small black hat, Rin seated herself with her back against the natural stone wall behind her, looking down and out at the valley below them. A fierce wind was flattening the treetops with a sheet of rain that was so thick it cast an eerie gray veil over the forests below. Sesshoumaru remained outside, his long white hair and fluffy pelt billowing fiercely in the wind.

Squeezing the water from her own soaked black hair, Rin glanced up over her head, noticing that the height of the outcropping likely would not accommodate someone as tall as Sesshoumaru, at least not without him having to bang his head on the rocky ceiling. A flash of guilt prompted her to move out from under the shelter to speak with him and, immediately, she was assaulted once more by the angry storm.

"Should we find someplace else?" she yelled at him above the wind. "You can't just stand out here like this!"

He looked down at her, sopping white tendrils of hair hanging heavily over his forehead. "I am already wet."

"But you'll ---"

"Become sick? You know better than that. Go back inside. This is the best we're going to find around here."

"Well…what if you get struck by lightning?" she tried again, looking warily up at the sky as yet another bolt crackled against the inky darkness.

"I will be irritated," he replied seriously, exasperatedly eyeing the girl who was now so thoroughly drenched one would have thought she had been tossed fully clothed into a raging river. He turned to regard his short retainer, who, having seen that his esteemed master was not joining the human inside the shelter, had settled himself almost defiantly out in the rain. Rivulets of water streamed down Jaken’s staff and off of his pointy nose as he blinked his large eyes against the rainy onslaught.

"Jaken," Sesshoumaru called, "go find something that's dry enough to burn."

Jaken's amphibian face formed an expression that could have not been more aghast if Sesshoumaru had requested that he use the Staff of Heads to render himself into a cheerfully blazing bonfire. He did not dare complain, however, and Rin watched as he shuffled off down the sloped hill, no doubt cursing her and her infuriating human need to avoid long periods of being cold and wet.

Sesshoumaru turned back to admonish Rin, who was still standing beside him. "You were far more obedient when you were a child." And this time Rin took that as the request it was meant to be, stepping in out of the rain to sit idly, watching worriedly as the storm poured down on the demon outside.

By the time Jaken returned triumphantly clutching a mixed pile of twigs and dry leaves, the storm had somewhat abated, having worn itself out with its own fury. Jaken scurried under the overhang, his green skin shining in the darkness from the soaking he had received, shoveling the whole mass of kindling into Rin's lap.

"There. Figure out how to light it, girl."

"That won't be a problem," she replied nonchalantly, put off by his haughtiness. Now silently praying that she would be able to follow through on that boast, she set about trying to coax a fire, Jaken raucously mocking at her efforts the entire way. When smoke began to appear, followed by a small flame, she could not help but smirk at him.

As much as he ridiculed her for being incompetent, Jaken seemed to enjoy the warmth that came from the fire, which quickly offset the coolness of the storm. In almost no time, the little green toad was sprawled out on the ground, yellow eyes lolled back in his head, tiny clawed feet twitching in sleep. Rin watched him with amusement as she huddled next to the fire, wishing that at least her hair would hurry up and dry. It was becoming cold.

She glanced outside once more, waiting impatiently for the rain to stop. Sesshoumaru was still out there, though he had finally seated himself to wait out the storm. He looks positively drowned, Rin thought, rising to her feet and hunching awkwardly so that she could move to the edge of the overhang. She seated herself once more, this time a few feet away from him.

“We’ll move on as soon as it stops,” he said without inflection, looking impressively unperturbed by his sodden state.

“All right,” she agreed.

He turned to look at her, golden eyes piercing through the dark and giving off a faint animalistic glow. “You’re not going to get dry if you sit there.”

“I can feel the fire from here,” she replied quietly. “You shouldn’t have to sit out here alone all night.”

He eyed the height of the overhang once more, looking unimpressed. “Short of decapitation, that is precisely what I have to do.”

She smiled at him, feeling a sudden surge of affection. “We can move on whenever you’re ready. Surely we’re not that far from your home?”

“At our current pace, If we leave in the morning, we will be there by nightfall.”

In her mind’s eye, Rin tried to picture the old house she had once called her own home. Rarely had they ever spent more than a day or two at a time within its walls, so insistent had Sesshoumaru always been about resuming their search for Naraku, but she had loved returning to the place because it very much reflected the personality of its owner: clean, calm, a bit austere, but comfortable even so. Her own room had been in direct contradiction to the rest of the house, always full of flowers or random odds and ends she would find during their travels. She had also been quick to commandeer the few things in the house that actually contained color, this effort resulting in an odd mixture of Sesshoumaru’s family’s things and her own accumulated treasures. Jaken had always been dismayed by her room for its eclectic compilation of items that had belonged to youkai that, though long dead, had been the ancestors of his master and, thus, should be viewed with a similar reverence. A vibrant red and gold robe had been one of the first things to come into contention, an item that Rin had found lying in an old trunk in one of the vacant rooms. Rin had thought it would be a beautiful addition to her bed, but Jaken had almost choked in appall when he had witnessed what she had done…

“You…! How dare you show such disrespect, you stupid girl? That was Inutaisho-sama’s!” Jaken had sputtered at her, green fist waving.

“It’s not disrespectful, Jaken-sama!” Rin had declared, raising her chin haughtily. “I am taking good care of it! And it was lying in a box!”

“Have you no thought as to other people’s belongings? Sesshoumaru-sama is going to be furious with you!”

“No, he’s not,” Rin had instantly replied, but her young face had reflected her uncertainty.

The entire affair had been resolved by the presence of the demon lord himself, who had swept into the room, frowning at the amount of noise they had been creating. Jaken had been quick to report Rin’s bad behavior, but it was the little girl who had been vindicated when Sesshoumaru had simply called Jaken a “sentimental fool” and left them to their argument.

Now Rin could see Jaken’s point of view. It had been rather audacious of her to paw through Sesshoumaru’s things as she had done, but at the time she had seen no harm. It had made her feel more at home in a house that had struck her as too large, too quiet, and full of too many shadows.

Another streak of lightning creased the sky, though this time much further in the distance. She wondered momentarily about Kameko and Kisho back at the village, both likely long asleep and completely oblivious to the storm that was heading their way. She missed them already, but…. She watched the profile of the demon a few feet away from her, and wondered suddenly if it was possible to have two places one considered home.

“Sesshoumaru-sama?” she called quietly, anxious not to wake Jaken now that he was securely unconscious and not digging at her with some sort of insult. “Do you think this is over? Now that Kagome has the Shikon no Tama…and you have the sword?”

Sesshoumaru pondered the question for a moment before giving her an answer. The matter of reducing the weapon’s ability to destroy had been accomplished, but there was still a need to discover why this event had occurred so suddenly. The jewel did not act of its own accord; its power was brought out by the influence of others and, with that fact firmly established, what or who had caused it to resurface? He looked back at the young woman who watched him so intently, awaiting his answer. Had it been her…? No, he decided, there was nothing about Rin that spoke of supernatural abilities. She was as much an average human as any other.

“For now, the issue is settled. I am going to find a way to destroy this sword, but there are many questions still unanswered. Unfortunately, I do not know of anyone who would have the answers I am looking for,” he replied to her. So we wait, he thought silently. We wait and see what happens.

Eyeing the hilt of the sword he was speaking about, Rin added quickly, “Do you think it’s wise to destroy it? I’m sure it could be useful if ---“

“The one who is meant to wield it has been dead for three centuries. Its purpose is to purify a youkai’s demonic aura, youki, which is stressful enough to kill almost any demon. It will be best for both demons and humans alike if this sword is destroyed.”

“Will I be returning to Kameko now?” Rin asked almost hesitantly, ears distantly registering the slowing rain. As much as she missed her former guardian and the little boy she had come to regard as a brother, she was not ready to leave Sesshoumaru again. He was important to her and the idea of not seeing him for a very long time or, perhaps, ever again, made her anxious.

“Is that what you wish?” he asked, studying her carefully, his own face as unreadable as ever.

“No,” she answered honestly, and a little too quickly. “I would like to stay with you if you will let me, at least for a little while. But it can’t be terribly convenient for a demon to have a human trailing after him.”

“No, it isn’t,” he agreed with a subtle nod of the head. Rin kept her features level so as to avoid making her disappointment visible, but his next words and the sly amusement that crept into his tone brought her smile back. “But, as you are aware, I have been known to make an exception.”

Relieved that her place with him had been restored, Rin settled in to watch as the rain slackened bit by bit. The quiet moment was soon broken by the onset of loud snoring on the part of Jaken, a sound that Sesshoumaru quickly rewarded with a well-aimed rock that smacked his retainer right on the nose, causing him to sit up from sleep and look around wildly.

“Your company is entirely preferable to his,” Sesshoumaru told Rin wryly, before turning again to look out at the valley below.



------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------


As Sesshoumaru had predicted, they arrived at his home just as the sun was setting in the distance. Rin, however, did not allow the lack of proper daylight to keep her from hurrying to the stable that housed Ah-Un. The double-headed beast was already curiously looking up from its dinner as the door was pulled open and she rushed in.

“Ah-Un!” Rin exclaimed, waiting to make sure the dragon recognized her before extending two hands to pet its leathery twin snouts. The beasts’ heads bobbed in greeting, snorting loudly as one nose reached out to nuzzle at the top of Rin’s dark head.

“I missed you,” she told the animal fondly. Ah-Un had become her much beloved companion from the moment Sesshoumaru had turned the animal over to her. It had taken some time to get him to like her as much in return, since he had been quite unused to the constant touch and attention of a human girl, but he had adapted to her quickly, becoming her loyal defender.

“And I bet you haven’t had a proper bath since the last time I gave you one, am I right?” she scolded, giving him a good scratch behind the ears.

“Jaken would be offended to hear you say that,” Sesshoumaru’s voice came from behind her, sounding not at all opposed to the toad youkai hearing the words for himself. “He has practically drowned himself on a number of occasions trying to wash that beast.”

Rin looked over her shoulder as Sesshoumaru walked into the dark enclosure. “That’s strange. Ah-Un never gave me any trouble…”

“Ah-Un likes you,” Sesshoumaru reminded her.

Grinning widely at the mental image of Jaken trying to drag the enormous animal to any body of water that would be deep enough to serve as a suitable bath, Rin gave the dragon a final pat and then turned toward the house, Sesshoumaru following behind her.

The gray stone and wood structure sprawled across the landscape, dominating it completely, ringed by an unbroken forest of trees. Overly-wet grass sunk underneath her feet as she walked toward the front steps that extended from the house. She ascended them, noticing that the wooden stairs creaked in all the same places they had before. Inside, she found that Jaken had already set about lighting the lamps, all of which burned cheerfully in their brackets on the stone walls. With undisguised interest, Rin wandered into the main room, Sesshoumaru shadowing her from behind.

“Everything is exactly the same,” she finally commented, reaching out to touch an odd-looking statue-like decoration that had always reminded her of an angry, open-mouthed demon. “But nothing around you ever changes very much, does it, Sesshoumaru-sama?”

He said nothing in reply, but watched her as she moved to look at one of the swords that had belonged to his great-grandfather, her reflection shining back at her in the orange light. “Except me,” she amended her earlier statement, smiling slightly as she turned to glance at him. “But that’s to be expected.”

“You have changed very much,” he agreed quietly. “I would not have recognized you.”

And indeed he would not have. It was disconcerting, reconciling the perpetually buoyant little girl he had known before with the far calmer young woman standing before him now. She continued to study him wordlessly, making him wonder why it was that she looked at him so intently. Her gaze finally broke and she ended her inspection of the room.

This place, all these things that spoke of him reminded her forcefully of those years of worry and doubt that had shadowed her while she had lived with Kameko; all the unanswered questions and the promise to come for her that had been broken. She felt that she understood why he had made the decision to leave her to her human life, but there still existed a hurt brought on by the fact that, if not for the recovery of Midoriko’s sword, she most certainly would not have seen him again.

Sesshoumaru watched as her expression changed to something more distant, sadder, a reflection of some internal debate he could not see. The old Rin would have simply blurted out what was bothering her. This one apparently meant to keep her thoughts to herself. And so she did as she excused herself from him with the insistence that she wanted to find her room.

Rin had no problem locating her old bedroom, her troubled heart quickly soothed by the rediscovery of the many things she had left behind, or, rather, the things she had not had the opportunity to take with her to Kameko's village. Sesshoumaru was the type to act as soon as his mind was made up. He had done just that when he had come to his decision about where she needed to be placed while he continued his hunt for Naraku.

It seemed he and Jaken had not touched anything in the room while she had been gone. Everything was still precisely as it had been, as though caught in a moment in time that still waited for a cheerful little girl in an orange-and-yellow kimono to come bursting through the door. She lifted things from tables and drawers, inspecting them before placing them back where they belonged. Opening one box displayed a vast array of dried, crumbling flowers, some single, some tied together with various bits of string.

His bouquets, she thought, grinning widely. How certain she had always been that they were perfectly legitimate gifts. Now it was enough to make her laugh, thinking about all the times she had shoved a handful of these things, most nothing more than weeds, into his hands. They had been a physical expression of feelings she had been too shy to voice. He had always returned them to her and she had taken the duty of keeping track of them very seriously, placing them all carefully in the box. Shaking her head with amusement, Rin pulled the lid down once more and put it back underneath the table.

He should have been sainted for putting up with that, she thought. If ever there was an individual who would not appreciate a bouquet of flowers, it was Sesshoumaru. How funny that she could see that now….

Feeling suddenly weary and anxious to rest her sore muscles, Rin stepped out of the kimono she had traveled in and pulled out another that she had brought from Kameko’s home, draping the material around her body as she headed for the door. She was no longer accustomed to the grime one collected on themselves after several days of travel and she was practically beside herself with a desire to scrub every inch of her skin clean. Pinning her hair on top of her head with one quick motion, she pattered barefoot down the hallway toward the bath.

As she entered the misty, heat-filled room and saw the familiar pool of warm water, Rin recalled that this was perhaps the convenience she had missed the most. Though Kameko’s home had been very nice, it had lacked many of the comforts of this place, most particularly, a naturally heated bath. Dropping the pale garment at her feet, Rin carefully slipped into the warm water and glided across the surface to the center, sinking to her neck and allowing the dirt to wash off of her.

It was so strange, this feeling of being at home and yet out of place; stranger still how, despite those mixed emotions, she felt very content, as though she had returned to something very comfortable and familiar. She had missed being around him. Sesshoumaru’s life was often chaotic, but he always managed to return things to their rightful order. Life with him was secure and unchanging, not at all like in the human village where there was a constant melding of birth and death, joy and grief. Death was not something she dealt well with, Rin realized, and perhaps that was another reason why she was clinging to an individual who was as permanent as there was the ability to be. She did not have to worry about sudden illness claiming Sesshoumaru’s life and she was more than aware that he could defend himself easily against anyone. She knew as a witness to his many battles that it would be very difficult to kill him at all.

Her mind switched then and turned to Sesshoumaru’s brother, Inuyasha, and the human girl, Kagome. It had been heartwarming to witness Kagome’s reunion with her friends, but there was something in particular about the hanyou and the human that intrigued her. They were quite obviously very in love with each other and it made her wonder if they realized what they were headed toward. Like her, Kagome probably had another fifty or sixty years left to her life. Inuyasha, no doubt, had much more than that. It made Rin’s stomach clench to think of how painful that separation would be some day.

She knew that Sesshoumaru had once disapproved of his brother’s involvement with Kagome and that brought about new questions. Was it because of the girl’s comparatively short existence? Perhaps because of a personal dislike for her? Or simply because she was human? Jaken had often told Rin in the past that Sesshoumaru greatly detested humans, something she had always childishly rebuked as being clearly false because, after all, how could that be? She was there, wasn’t she? And he didn’t hate her…

Pondering this now, she could see that the issue was probably more complicated than the young Rin’s idealized view of the matter. It unsettled her to think that perhaps Jaken had been correct. He had served Sesshoumaru for a long time and knew things about him that Rin did not; if he was correct in claiming that his master hated humans, then did Sesshoumaru truly want her to be here with him? Or had he simply retrieved her out of a sense of obligation that had come from years of seeing to her welfare? She had come to believe that he had left her in the village because he had felt that a human influence and the involvement of a woman would be more suitable for the upbringing of a little girl, but…had that really been what had guided his decision?

She frowned at these complicated questions, resolving to get the answers from him. As much as she had missed him, she certainly did not want to remain in his household if he preferred her to be in the human village. With this new conviction, Rin stood up in the water and moved back toward the edge of the pool.

When the door suddenly flew open to admit Jaken, all she could do for a long moment was simply gape at him in horrified surprise before finally having the presence of mind to sink back underneath the water.

“You lazy girl! Did you bother to ask before coming in here? I found your dinner,” he sneered at her, hands drawn up at his sides, glaring at her in consternation.

“Get out!” she yelled at him.

Looking even more affronted by this demand, Jaken’s eyes narrowed until his beady pupils were barely visible through the slits. “Don’t order me about like some common house boy! As I’ve told you before, I outrank yo---,” he retorted loudly.

“Jaken, get out! I’m not dressed!”

“What are you shrieking about, you hysterical female? Do you think I care---?”

Biting down on her lip in frustration at the intrusion, Rin looked around her for something she could possibly throw at the annoying servant, her hands finally reaching up into her hair to pull out the ornament that was holding it in place. She hurled the object at Jaken who promptly ducked it with a speed she would not have credited him with.

It smashed into the wall outside the open door, barely missing Sesshoumaru who materialized with a dark expression, obviously drawn to the quarrel by the loud voices. Blood rushed to Rin’s face as she ducked even further into the water, long hair falling to provide some strategic cover. Fortunately, the demon lord saved her further embarrassment by recognizing the situation and rectifying it quickly.

As Jaken opened his mouth to complain about Rin’s rudeness, Sesshoumaru grabbed him by the back of the neck and tossed him out into the hallway, slamming the door behind him on his way out. When the room was occupied by only her once more, Rin rose from the water again, quickly grabbing her kimono, and breathing an embarrassed sigh as she did so. Living here again, she realized, was clearly going to take some adjustment.

------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------

Dinner proved to be a mostly silent affair. Rin studied her plate, ignoring the fierce stares Jaken was giving her. No doubt he felt her to be very ungrateful, as he had gone about the process of locating food for her only to have her scream and throw things at him when he went to find her. Seeing it from his point of view, Rin felt rather badly about the situation. He was still dealing with her as though she was that eight-year-old girl; of course he would not understand the privacy that one required when they got older.

“Thank you, Jaken-sama,” she said quietly when he huffed past her within ear shot. “For the dinner. It was very kind of you.”

He graced her with a less vicious glare, but she saw that he was somewhat appeased by the unstated apology. She could only hope that Sesshoumaru had discussed the issue of privacy with him when he had dragged his faithful servant out of the bath room. It was something she certainly did not want to approach with Jaken; just recalling the scene made her face redden.

When dinner was concluded and Rin had taken care of cleaning up, she quickly looked to escape the still-peeved Jaken by seeking out the company of his master. Pacing her way through the familiar corridors, she found Sesshoumaru in his room, securing Midoriko’s sword to the wall along with the other weapons he kept there. She hovered at the door, looking in at the cavernous room that, though mostly sparse, held many items that hinted at opulence, but not ostentatiousness.

“I discussed what occurred earlier with Jaken. It will not happen again,” he finally said absently, his attention sounding distant as he stepped back to regard the sword that now hung from the wall.

Rin took this as an invitation to enter and walked inside, noticing that, just like the rest of the house, this room had not changed at all. The furnishings, the few decorations, it was all precisely as she remembered. As was his usual habit, the screen that led to the outdoors was open as well, allowing a summery breeze to blow through the room.

She moved to stand near him, her eyes falling to the table that rested in front of them, quickly recognizing one of the objects that lay on the smooth, lightly-grained surface. Without hesitation, Rin reached out to pick up the lopsided, almost-star-shaped stone, its polished black surface catching the light as she turned it in her hand.

“You kept this!” she exclaimed, turning a surprised smile on him.

“I didn’t throw it away,” he amended her statement, as though daring her to accuse him of sentimentality.

“I remember this,” she said, grinning at the memory. Remembrances of small hands at play came to mind, digging and reaching into that riverbed.... “I found it in a river. I gave it to you for your twentieth birthday,” she said, grinning mischievously.

“It was not my twentieth birthday,” Sesshoumaru wryly informed her, stepping away, as though uncomfortable with the sentimental turn in conversation.

“I know, but at the time that age seemed to suit you. You never did tell me how old you were or when you were born, so I assigned an age and a date to you.” She laughed as she looked up at him, eyes sparkling with amusement.

“Birthdays are not noted among youkai because we have too many of them. It would be like a human celebrating his birth every few weeks. After a short while, it would lose its meaning and become routine. Aging is not a surprise to us,” he explained reasonably.

“Of course,” she agreed, recognizing that that was very logical. “But recognition of someone's birth is a means to show how much an individual is loved and appreciated. It’s a way to say that you are glad they are there with you.” She looked at him expectantly. “And so? How far off was I?”

He was silent for a moment before deciding to appease her. “As of this past winter, I was born three hundred and ninety-eight years ago."

Rin’s eyes widened perceptibly. “Then I can understand what you mean. I think if I celebrated three hundred and ninety-eight of them, I would probably consider them routine, too.”

She placed the stone back on the table, the questions she had considered earlier in the evening resurfacing. She wondered if she should broach them with him, if he would even answer if she did. He walked to the screen and closed it, cutting off the freely-flowing breeze and her eyes followed his movements.

“It was you who protected my village,” she finally stated, watching as his head came up slightly at the sudden switch in conversation.

“Yes,” he agreed.

“Why?”

“Why?” he repeated, appearing curious at the question. “I think you know. Are you so surprised that I would do such a thing?”

“Not at all,” she replied with honesty. “I want you to know that I am very thankful, Sesshoumaru-sama. When I was younger, I don’t think it occurred to me how much you really did for me. The fact that I am here alive and breathing at all is entirely attributable to you.” She paused then, thinking back to those days of uncertainty and fear, when she had waited in that village, waited for him. “I was afraid for you. When you did not come back, I wondered if Naraku had killed you.”

“You worry far too much, a very human tendency,” he replied easily. “That hanyou never had a hope of killing me.”

“But surely you can understand my concern?”

“Yes,” he finally agreed. “I felt it best not to return for you because my presence would only have complicated the direction your life needed to take. You were better off in the human village. I was a source of protection for you for a while, but that was all I could provide.”

There was a long quiet pause before Rin finally found the nerve to ask him. “Sesshoumaru-sama, if I ask you something, will you answer me honestly?”

He looked at her in surprise, as though wondering why she would feel the need to make certain he would not lie to her. “Yes,” he replied, curious at the uncharacteristically serious expression on her face.

“Do you hate humans?” she asked instantly, eyeing him intently, gentle brown eyes locked on his face.

“Yes,” he answered unflinchingly, watching as the weight of his answer struck the girl, her expression flickering briefly. She asked for honesty, but surely she is smart enough to know that she has become an exception and should not take it personally....

“Why?” This new question seemed to beg for a reasonable explanation, one that would ease the constriction that had clamped onto her heart. Strangely, she had not expected so blunt an answer from him.

“For many reasons," he revealed. "They are an uncivilized species, one that breeds generation after generation to bring misery upon themselves and others. They defile the lands with their petty wars. They profess to be good and pure of heart, yet they think nothing of destroying each other, of succumbing to their greed and lust, of abandoning their orphaned young to fend for themselves,” and at this his eyebrows rose, piercing her with a pointed stare. “Not even animals display such behavior. I have come across many humans in my lifetime. I can count on my hand the number that were worth the air they breathed.”

Stunned by the harshness of his statement, Rin found she was too astounded to defend her species against his words. It seemed Jaken had been correct after all. “Do you want me here?” she asked tensely, now no longer certain of the answer she would receive.

“What sort of question is that?” he asked, taken aback by her odd tone. It was strange, these inquiries he was fielding from her. He was accustomed to her obediently following orders and asking trivial questions, not interrogating him for unspoken feelings and motivations. He was keenly aware that he was probably destroying the affection she held for him, but she had asked for honesty, and that was what he intended to give her.

“An important one. Jaken-sama has told me before about your revulsion toward humans. I did not believe him,” she said stiffly, eyes averting as though it was suddenly difficult to look at him. “I see now that he was correct, and I wonder if it is uncomfortable for you to have me here.”

“My dislike for your species has nothing to do with you.”

“I am human,” she reminded him.

“You are a separate issue. And to answer your question…you do not bother me. You are welcome to stay here.” The hardness fled his face then, lightening into something that suggested humor. “I am not known for being terribly polite. If I did not want you in my home, you would not be here to ask me these questions.”

Feeling strangely sad and relieved, Rin decided to end the conversation. She had her answer and though it bothered her to know his true feelings toward her kind, she was grateful for the certainty that he had been sincere in all of his words, including his admission that her presence was a welcome one. That would have to be enough for now.


-------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------


A constant, urgent whispering swarmed around her, in a voice, or perhaps voices she could not recognize or understand. The words fell over each other like water over rocks in a river, pounding against her ears until she almost felt a need to cover them. Rin looked around her, turning a full circle to see where or whom the noise was coming from, but all that was visible were velvety green fields and a pale blue sky that hung cheerfully overhead.

"Who is it?" Rin asked aloud, wincing as the whispers became even more adamant. Then, just as suddenly as they had begun, they ceased with an immediacy that caught her off guard. A blanketing silence fell around her and she dropped her hands back down to her sides.

"I hear them almost constantly," a soft melodic voice spoke from behind her and Rin instantly whirled around, surprised to see that a young woman had apparently snuck up behind her while she had been so focused on the noise. Suspicious, Rin eyed the girl a little nervously, noticing that she looked very sad, very ... tired. Or worried, perhaps? And Rin could not displace the feeling that this girl seemed somehow familiar ...

"Who are they?" Rin asked quietly, afraid to disturb the peace that had settled around them.

The girl did not answer, but looked directly up into the sun that hung overhead, seeming thoughtful. It was then that Rin noticed that, though sunlight bore down upon them, there was no accompanying heat. Everything about this place was eerily perfect to the point of being false. A chill swept down her spine as the girl turned to look at her with great intensity.

"I don't know," she finally answered Rin's question. "Sometimes I do know ... but then I forget..." The girl's expression faltered from serene to confused.

Not sure what to say to that, the creepy feeling that was settling within Rin prompted her to bring things back to some normalcy. "Ah ... my name is ..."

"Rin," the girl answered for her, looking up at her with a soft smile. "I know who you are. I know who you all are."

Apparently noticing Rin's growing nervousness and discomfort, she held out a hand and, instantly, the scene changed. The two of them were suddenly seated next to a gurgling stream, ancient trees hovering over them, their limbs bent forward from the weight of the branches. Rin's hands automatically dug into the grass around her, almost as though holding onto something solid would prevent another disorienting shift of reality. She looked behind her to see a small house situated not far away, the windows watching them quietly like glassy, open eyes.

"Don't be afraid," the girl assured her calmly, shiny dark hair shifting restlessly in the light wind.

Rin's eyes locked on the girl's face and, almost as though her brain had decided it was time to function again, she recalled precisely where she had seen this young woman before. When the boar demon had been about to kill her and she had wished for something to save her, there had been an image of a girl that had appeared ... and it was this person she was looking at now; sun-browned skin, bright brown eyes, and a sad face that looked as though it had once been content.

"Midoriko," Rin murmured uncertainly, and the girl gave a subtle nod.

"You destroyed my cave," Midoriko said, looking, if anything, almost amused.

Appalled, Rin immediately started to apologize. "I am so sorry. I didn't mean to ---"

"It's all right," Midoriko's voice interrupted, her hand waving as though to emphasize her lack of worry over the incident. "It has all lingered too long ... I have lingered too long. And do not feel remorse," she said, watching Rin's expression carefully. "This had to happen eventually. It could not continue as it was, because it would only have built into something bigger. You have my gratitude for waking me."

Feeling the beginnings of a headache starting to thump in the back of her head, Rin frowned. "I don't understand. We don't understand what's happening. Is it over now that the Shikon no Tama and your sword are separated?"

Midoriko's face reverted to sadness and her fingers folded into her lap. "I regret that it is not. I had to release them. Kagome meant to do the right thing by sealing Naraku with me, but I was not strong enough to hold onto him." She shook her head ruefully and looked out over the stumbling waters. "The Shikon no Tama exists because I was not strong enough. How strange that it has been used by others to increase their own strength. It appears that I do not understand my own heart."

"Your heart? So the Shikon no Tama is ---"

"Yes. I still do not really know what happened, but it is my greatest regret that I have created something that has caused so much harm. It was unintentional. If I had known what would have happened, I would have let Sesshoumaru handle matters. He had a bad feeling about that battle, and he has always had such good instincts; scary, really," Midoriko admitted, turning to look at Rin again, the smile returning to pull up the corners of her mouth. "It will likely please him to know that he was right. I had no business fighting a horde of demons that large. Not then."

Intrigued by the sudden mention of Sesshoumaru's name, Rin found herself asking, "Then did you know him well?"

"I knew him very well, at least, the person he was then .... now, I am not sure. He has changed very much." She regarded Rin almost affectionately. "You were very good for him. Before you arrived, his heart had become very dark, consumed by things he allowed to hurt him, to enrage him, to eat at him, to alter him. Your influence brought him back to something more like what he was."

"How do you know these things?"

"As I said earlier, I know you all very well," Midoriko answered, eyes becoming distant then, as though looking inward to the whirl of faces that had come into contact with the Shikon no Tama, for good or ill. "I know the heart of every soul that has encountered the Shikon no Tama ... you, Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, Miroku, Hiten, Tsubaki, Sango, Kagome, Bankotsu, Kikyou, Naraku, and all the others .... Good or evil, I know you all. You interest me especially, Rin. It is your heart that I relate to the most. Our backgrounds are very similar and we both share a strong affection for a certain youkai lord," Midoriko revealed, but then the slight smile faded. "It is because of our similarities that I find it easy to speak with you, I think. In any case, I am here for a purpose." Midoriko's brown eyes became intense once more as she regarded Rin seriously. "Tell him that they have been released from their seals, that I could not hold onto them any longer. He needs to be careful because there is something else involved here, something I cannot explain. The Shikon no Tama cannot be trusted. I can no longer control it; it has fallen to Kagome ... and to the other, to fight over it." She paused, as though gathering her thoughts and then went on. "Sesshoumaru had reason to fear the sword the night he prevented your using it. It was not I who prompted you to wield it, but another. I attempted to defend you so that you would not try to use it," she said admonishingly.

Absorbing these words into a mind spinning with questions, Rin finally asked, “What is it that you are warning me about? What’s going to happen?"

Midoriko looked thoughtful once more as she answered, "I cannot predict the future, but I do know that Naraku's horde is angry and vengeful." She went very quiet then, listening, a frown crossing her features. A few moments later, Rin's ears could pick up on the growing sounds of the whispering again, rising in volume slowly but steadily. Midoriko stood, her kimono falling in perfect, unwrinkled folds around her. "Thank you, Rin. Please remember," she said, then added as an afterthought. "And tell Sesshoumaru ... tell him that I am very sorry."

Before Rin could get clarification of what was meant by that, the young woman before her began to fade from something solid to transparent, and the scene around her turned dark…

Rin’s eyes snapped open and she sat up in her dark bedroom, heart thumping, her breathing sounding loud to her own ears. The rain had started once more; she could hear it pattering softly on the roof. Recalling the words and images of the dream, how real it had seemed, she threw back the blanket and got out of bed. She was supposed to tell him….

Tell him what? she thought suddenly, drawing up short just as her hand reached for the door. That some girl in a dream had told her that bad things were going to happen? That the Shikon no Tama was going to be the source of trouble? Now that she was completely awake, it sounded crazy even to her. I’m rattled, she thought. That sword…there was something about it that both intrigued her and made her uneasy. With Sesshoumaru’s grim outlook on the reappearance of the weapon and the jewel, it was no wonder she was having strange dreams.

It was nothing he needed to know.

------------------------------------------------------------ --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------

Seated on the outskirts of a town that was winding down its day, Ashrem looked slightly bored as he chewed at the first meal he had had in, apparently, three hundred years. It had astounded him when he had been told the year, having casually dropped questions to the townspeople as to who was now in control of the area, news of interesting events, anything to help get him caught up on what he had missed while he had been trapped in the hellish void that had been the Shikon no Tama.

Careful to spread out his questions to several people so as to avoid suspicion, Ashrem had gleaned much of interest during his visit within the town’s walls, one of the most gratifying pieces of information having been that Inutaisho was dead. This simplified matters greatly. One interfering dog demon destroyed, and now only his arrogant pup to be dealt with. Ashrem realized that Sesshoumaru would not be an easy opponent. He had been quite formidable even when he had been much younger; there was no doubt in Ashrem’s mind that his abilities were probably quite a bit more advanced after the passage of three centuries.

But he had a weakness, a human one that Ashrem was all too ready to exploit. It was only a matter of planning, timing, and waiting. He was patient. So long as Sesshoumaru remained completely unaware of his revival, Ashrem was free to do as he wished without fear of reprisal. Of course, it would take a while to master the jewel that had so ruthlessly dominated him for the past three hundred years, but with Midoriko weakened by the long years of constantly expended energy, of being passed from hand to hand and used as nothing more than a tool to increase one’s powers, his only true rival for control of the jewel was the miko, Kagome. He was certain that his abilities would be able to eclipse hers, likely without even having to remove the jewel from her keeping. Even now he could feel it hovering at the edges of his consciousness, that link to Midoriko’s heart that was being so carefully guarded once more.

This time there was the potential for another complication as well, Ashrem realized, but one that he was not overtly concerned about. The hanyou, Inuyasha, a result of one of Inutaisho’s many human entanglements. From what he had witnessed during the years he had been watching the outside world from within the Shikon no Tama, he could soundly guess that, if anything, Inuyasha would likely greet his older brother’s destruction with gratitude, or, at the very least, indifference. There was no love lost between those two. As long as Ashrem was careful in terms of his actions toward Kagome, Inuyasha would not become his enemy.

Yes, things were looking very good, even better than when Midoriko had been alive. Ashrem realized he had been too ambitious then, had taken on too much at one time. Midoriko’s powers had been too difficult to manipulate when she had been a living, breathing individual. This other girl, Rin…she had no such abilities, but would serve even better. He would find a way to bring the abilities to her. It was always best to attack an enemy from a front they did not expect. She would do nicely.

As he finished the last of his meal, Ashrem stood stiffly, his muscles still becoming accustomed to physical use after lying dormant for so long. He turned to walk back up the hillside, his hearing suddenly picking up the sounds of … what?

Looking up into the sky, he noticed what appeared to be a dark cloud soaring overhead, a menagerie of creatures flocking too closely together for him to pick out individuals, but it was easy to recognize what they were. A horde of demons was heading toward the northwest, the air around them almost crackling with youkai energy.

Interesting, Ashrem thought. Perhaps the leftovers of Naraku out to cause more trouble? In any case, it was a perfect test.

Standing very still and shadowed by the trees around him, Ashrem watched the horde carefully as it flew above him, mentally searching for his link to Midoriko’s powers, the ones still encased within the Shikon no Tama. It was a simple matter; her abilities flowed through his body with little more than a thought. A small smile of triumph crossed his lips as he casually raised a hand, aiming for the unknowingly targeted creatures. He could feel an almost overwhelming surge of energy shoot from his shoulder to his fingertips, preparing to obliterate them.

And then … without warning …. the energy died with a swiftness that made him stagger back a step. He pulled his hand down as though it had been burned, looking at it as though expecting an explanation to be written across his palm. His face drew into a scowl as, in his mind’s eye, the face of that foreign girl faded and he understood what had occurred. Kagome. She had stopped him, likely unknowingly with her strange powers. It was surely instinct to her at this point, the guarding of that jewel. Perhaps she would prove to be more of a problem after all, he thought, his heart darkening with anger. But it did not matter. He had not waited three centuries to fail again.

----------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------

“And this is how you play with this one,” Kagome instructed the little boy that was seated in her lap. She picked up a blindingly yellow plastic block and shoved it through one of the holes of the rectangular toy. “You match up the shapes, see? If you get it right, they’ll fit.”

With great seriousness, as though careful to make the right selection, Kenji’s small fingers wrapped around the red block she extended to him. He placed it in the correctly-shaped hole, and was immediately praised by the ecstatic Kagome, her hands clapping together in a motion he was quick to imitate. She was pleased to see that he was so enjoying Souta’s old baby toys, the ones for which she had returned to her own time to scavenge out of her mother’s closets. Everyone had been amazed when she had dumped a bagful of strange, colorful toys onto the floor of Sango and Miroku’s home, many of which made strange noises or spun crazily about. They were an endless source of entertainment for Kenji, who had never seen anything like them in his entire life. Even Shippou and Inuyasha had not been able to help themselves from poking and prodding at some of the toys that seemed to whirl about of their own volition.

“You’re spoiling him, Kagome-chan,” Sango teased as she watched her friend play with her son.

“I have two years to make up for,” Kagome explained, eyes lifting to Sango's face with expressive affection. She had been gratified to see that all of her fears for her friends had been unfounded. Sango had mostly tamed Miroku of his lecherous ways and agreed to marry him. Shippou resided with Kaede, who was practically a grandmother to him. And Inuyasha …. Kagome glanced over at the hanyou who was seated next to her, watching Kenji’s playing intently, his own eyes wide with barely repressed curiosity.

They took good care of him, she thought fondly. Sango had quietly revealed to her that Inuyasha had been the main reason they had decided to reside within Kaede’s village, unwilling to leave him on his own after her disappearance. And now that that separation was resolved, everything seemed almost too good to be true. Miroku’s life was no longer threatened by the Kazaana, Sango had her brother back, Shippou had his new family, and Inuyasha …. was content. They were all together again, and Kagome felt as though those four long years had simply melted away, replaced by these moments, the way it was supposed to be.

Inuyasha caught her eye as she watched him, his own eyes warm as they met hers. Of all of them, he had changed the least and Kagome was very grateful. He had been sticking with her like a second shadow ever since they had returned, but she was glad to see that they had fallen back into step with each other as easily as if there had been no separation. It only reinforced Kagome’s certainty that she belonged with him … and she was equally sure, though he had yet to find the words to say it for himself, that he felt the same.

Kenji called for her attention once more. She looked down at his progress as he continued to place the blocks in the correct slots, murmuring praise from over his head. And then, quite suddenly, a strange darkness clouded her vision, casting a purple haze on the child and his movements. Kagome blinked it away with a frown, but it was Inuyasha’s voice that first warned her that she was not the only one who had noticed something was wrong.

“Kagome …” he said urgently, his body going tense as he watched the jewel that hung around her neck.

Kagome looked down at the weight that rested against her collarbone, watching as the overly-bright Shikon no Tama slowly darkened with a swirl of blackness that engulfed it, making it feel suddenly heavy. With barely a thought, she moved Kenji out of her lap and backed away from the others who were now watching her with apprehensively surprised expressions. Miroku and Sango were frozen, appearing poised to jump to some sort of action, but unsure of what exactly to do.

“Kagome … take it off …,” Inuyasha ordered quickly, rising to his feet in a flash, one hand outstretched to pull the chain off of her.

Barely hearing him, Kagome stared into the swirling depths of the jewel and, for a moment, could swear she saw the image of a gigantic horde of demons hurtling across the sky, and a hand reaching toward them ….

Instinctively she clasped her fingers around the Shikon no Tama before Inuyasha could pull it away, closing her fist around it and, immediately, the darkness dissipated, clearing the air. Obviously unnerved, Inuyasha's clawed fingers quickly opened her hand and seized the glittering ball, pulling the chain up and over her head, holding it as though it was a snake that was about to strike.

“Kagome-sama,” Miroku said, still poised in a defensive posture, “What …?”

“I have no idea,” she murmured honestly, eyeing the jewel that now dangled innocently from the chain held in Inuyasha’s claws. “It just … developed a dark aura.”

“On its own?” Sango asked uncertainly.

“No … I don’t know." Kagome gathered her thoughts for a moment and then said, “It was probably just something residual left over from before I purified it,” she suggested, hoping to soothe the wary Inuyasha. “It’s not as though it has a mind of its own, Inuyasha. Everything’s fine. I purified it again,” she assured him, extending her hand for the necklace, which the hanyou reluctantly placed back into her hand. Dismissing her own troubled thoughts so as to calm the others, Kagome placed the jewel around her neck once more and knelt next to Kenji, prepared to continue their play. This time everyone around her watched with unswerving interest, and the combined weight of their stares only served to make her nervous.

Their idle play did not continue long, however. Inuyasha’s ears twitched and he turned his head toward the door, his senses alerting him to the approach of something menacing. The others watched curiously as he pulled open the door and took a step outside, keen golden eyes glaring up into the sky to see a heavy, roiling cloud zooming straight toward the village. He had seen them before; not for several years, but they were familiar and unwelcome just the same. Even though their numbers were great, it was not that that perturbed Inuyasha most, but the horribly familiar smell they were bringing with them. Shippou appeared quickly beside him, his nose twitching silently as he, too, picked up the scent. Eyes going round with disbelief, Shippou said uncertainly, “They smell like ---“

“Naraku,” Inuyasha finished through clenched teeth, head tilted skyward as the horde of youkai poured down toward the village.