InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Requiem of Time ❯ Time and Time Again ( Chapter 5 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

A/N: Chapter five! Wow, it seems like it should be longer... I'm torn between blaming how long it's taking to write and how many splendid reviews there are. XD

So, yes! A chapter within two weeks! Wow. I blame the fact that finals are going to be hitting hard soon, so don't expect any writing for a month from now. :P After that, I may pick up the pace again! No promises though. Also, thanks to many complaints, this chapter is pretty darn long. As in 'over twenty pages' long. Enjoy!

Chapter 5

Time and Time Again

Kagome swore her heart just stopped. There was sky overhead. It was night. The air was clear of city lights and she could see the stars perfectly. Either Tokyo enacted a revert-to-nature act in the time she was gone, or she was lost somewhere in Kansas. And to think those were only her preferred options. She knew she wasn't home though, and she only wanted to be in a time in which the well was covered.

Sesshomaru jumped up.

“NO!!” she shrieked, clinging tightly and curling up into him, burying her face into his shoulder when he landed lightly. If she didn't see it, then it never happened and she wasn't involved. “Go back! Please, go back!”

He was still for an instant, his right hand lifting to resume holding her and taking some weight off his neck. “Is something wrong?”

“Of course something's wrong!” she practically sobbed into the thick silk of his haori, now adding 'while in Sesshomaru's arms' to the thousands of what-if's she created in her spare time for how the well could mess up her life for another round. She was pretty sure that they were in the past. Again. No, not again. She couldn't do this all over again. “I'll explain things later. Just please, please go back!”

There was a sudden spike of raw power some distance away, a warning that they should turn around and disappear as quickly as they appeared before something bad happened. It made her own energy simmer under her skin as it sought to escape and prove that she was not a weak and easy target. Kagome felt Sesshomaru stiffen, his grip on her thigh and over her right shoulder blade tightening, and fearing the sensation of his own power coiling against her she poked his neck before he could make a similar reply to the distant stranger. He gave an odd, annoyed grunt, but she was satisfied upon sensing the power seep back into its dormant state.

Even without Sesshomaru finishing what he started, the yÅkai was already on their way. Splendid. She even had a good idea of who it was.

“Sesshomaru!” Kagome yelled against his clothing, quickly slipping into a schizophrenic fit and holding him tightly. There was only one yÅkai who could have that much power, if they were in the past and as far as she knew, and she rea-a-a-a-ally didn't want a formal introduction. “I swear on my life that I'll never, EVER speak to you again if we don't leave back through the well this INSTANT!”

His composure broke, expressed in his loosened grip. “But-”

She smacked the shoulder she wasn't pressing her face into. “SIT BOY!!”

She got a glare for that. She knew she did, and most likely deserved it, but she still refused to look up and confirm it was there. That being was still approaching, having halved the distance in about four seconds, and it made her very spine shiver with fear for not looking around for it. At this rate, she was going to be a main ingredient for something interesting. That, or just dead.

Kagome got her point through though with the crude command, and after a heart wrenching and very welcomed sensation of uplift they were falling back into the well. She counted the seconds. It took one to start falling, the yÅkai coming closer, two before the well activated and she felt it no more than a hundred feet away, and then she'd never been happier to be covered in ancient magic, almost missing it when it disappeared and left her in silence.

“Kagome.”

She flinched and her head shot up frantically. “We're back, yes??” There was a roof above her head beyond the square opening of the well, and relief snapped her tension as it went crashing down on her. “Oh, thank goodness. Which time are we in?”

“Mine,” he replied. “You know who that was, correct?”

He sounded to be on the brink of growling, and if she knew her history, he had a very good reason to. She tried to make herself smaller, knowing she just did a very big no-no by telling Sesshomaru what to do. She had good reason to though, dammit! Though, that may not make her case too clearly if he was indeed mad at her... “Um, maybe?”

Sesshomaru took that sheepish answer as a 'yes', and smoothly leaped out of the well. She didn't want to release him when he set her down on her feet, at which she stared.

“I am going back.”

Now she was looking at him. He was serious? “No!” she practically barked, a little too quickly. Screw feeling bad over telling him what to do, he was being an idiot!

The hardness was in his eyes again, reminding her of when she had first seen him. Fear splashed her back and disappeared, making her shiver. It's difficult to notice such little changes after knowing someone for so long until they revert. In response to her reaction he blinked, and his eyes softened somewhat.

“Sesshomaru, please, you can't!” she now pleaded.

“I will,” he replied, his voice remaining firm but not cold. “There is unfinished business to attend to.”

Her heart cracked at hearing that, and she tried to gather the pieces while putting her little speech together, the multitasking making her stammer. His last words confirmed who they almost ran into, and it hurt her to have to speak her mind. Sesshomaru had very good reason to go back. In his shoes, she would already be gone.

“Sesshomaru, I- I really don't want to say this, but please, promise me you will NOT go back through the well. Ever.” He was becoming angry with her, and she quickly continued. “I know, I'm WAY out of line to say that, because I'd be feeling the same way if I were in your place, but- but time travel is more risky than it looks, and-!”

She cut off when her own words registered. Great, now he was insulted. She traveled the well like it was the Tokyo tram on a one hundred percent discount, and here she was telling him it was too dangerous. Her mouth flapped, useless with a stunned brain but wanting to work.

“I-”

“Am not making sense,” he finished for her, turning for the well. “I am leaving now. This shall not take long.”

Kagome panicked. “I might not be here when you get back!” she cried in more ways than one before she even thought the words. Kami, but she was scared. She knew Sesshomaru hated the man, and if he did something different, just one little thing... “Sesshomaru, you can make it so I'm never born!”

He stopped, summoning patience from the air loudly through his nose, openly annoyed. But he had stopped, and that was a good thing. Oh boy, she had something bad coming for her as payment for him listening to her threats.

“Listen, I know how tempting it is, and I know how good of reason you have, but please, give me time to explain where I'm coming from before you jump into things.” Things such as wells.

Sesshomaru turned to face her with a frown, and she backpedaled a few steps when red eyes met hers.

“He is my father,” Sesshomaru said with a quickly hardening and gravelly tone. He probably didn't notice it was changing. Kami, he was as mad as when she had strangled him all that time ago? She flinched horribly when he continued. “Why, pray tell, should I not go and kill him yet?”

She didn't know whether to pity him or feel a little sickened by his intentions. Not wanting to be indecisive she abandoned both ideas and straightened her back, clasping her hands together over her lap to hide their shaking. Sesshomaru could be a very scary man, but she knew he wasn't angry with her. Yes, she just had to keep telling herself that.

“Sesshomaru,” she started, swallowing and trying to remember all the scattered pieces of family history she didn't play a part in. “If you kill your father now, then Inuyasha will have not been born, which means that Kikyo would have never fallen in love and died feeling betrayed, taking the Shikon Jewel with her in her spirit and giving it to me in the future, and that means that I would have never gone to your time.”

He had yet to be convinced.

“Sesshomaru, we never would have met if that were the case.” She wanted to fiddle with her fingers, or tuck back her hair, or scream profanities until the moon was full, but she stayed still and didn't dare drop scary eye contact with him. “I'm too happy knowing you to let you go through there hot headed and slaughter-” oh, kami, was she going to say that? She didn't want him to kill his father, and she didn't want his doing so to kill their growing relationship. “-everything.”

She flushed slightly, of all the brilliant timing to do so, and waited. It seemed like her heart was waiting for something to happen as well. Why, oh why, did he have to be stubborn on all the very important things? He was as bad as Inuyasha right now, for crying out loud.

Finally the red leaked from Sesshomaru's eyes, retreating, and he blinked as her lips lounged into a relieved smile. He rubbed his forehead with irritation, a rare sight in and of itself, and gave a vexed sigh. “Say that a few more times, and it may make sense.”

Things didn't click together in Kagome's head, and so of course time jerked to an abrupt and rude stop. “... What?” she asked. It really wasn't that hard to grasp, was it? You fiddle with the past and you end up fiddling with the future. Then again, that was putting it in future theory to someone from the past. “Oh. You haven't thought about those time- Time fluxy... thingies.” Her finger touched her mouth and her head tilted down to the side. “What are those called again?”

She stiffened when he took a seat on the lip of the well. Rather than join him, she stared at the dirt, and suddenly it was picture time.

“Okay,” she breathed some strained minutes later, her right index finger plagued with grit in all the wrong places as she stared down at her work of art in the ground. Depicting time interruptions, consequences, possibility paths, and the normal frame from which they branched was a lot harder than cartoons gave it credit for.

Sesshomaru understood everything though, thankfully, and then sliced through her logic with the next statement. “In other words, I can do whatever I wish, because whatever will happen has already happened to leave us where we presently are.”

Kagome's head was going to split open, and it was all thanks to a stupid well. “Um. Yeah, that's one theory.”

Sesshomaru, who had indeed been hunched to put an elbow on a knee and his chin in his palm, now straightened and stretched. His back didn't make a sound. “There is more?”

“Not really,” she replied, practically tingling for a good back crack now and resisting. At least he was calm again, and apparently a little more carefree in her presence. “It's just theories. Some people go by what you just said, and others say that everything can happen for a first time and then mess everything else up. Then there's the whole debate on what fate is compared to time travel, and whether things are destined to happen the way they do or if it was just bad luck. If luck exists, that is.”

Sesshomaru frowned. “That does not make sense. How can an eternal loop begin in the effects of having already happened?”

... Damn him and his fluency... He was giving her a hard time with her own language, and being verbally simple while he was at it! Instead of answering right away, she scratched her head.

“Has it been proven?”

That got her attention, but she still gave him a muted expression, not too enthralled. “Has what been proven?”

Sesshomaru gestured at the ground, the setting sun now hitting part of her little doodle and highlighting odd grains in a red warmth. It was getting late. “That.”

“Oh,” she replied. “Um, no. It can't be. No one can time travel.”

He gave her a funny look, probably she just completely contradicted herself. “Except for you.”

She smirked. “Except for me. And I'm not about to become a scientific guinea pig or insane by blathering about it.”

His expression mirrored hers, and then faded away as he stared at Kagome in a contemplative manner.

She shifted, grinding dirt into the knees of her hakama. “What?”

“Are humans so utterly bored in the future that they study concepts which never apply to their lives?”

She stared back, trying not to laugh and doing a great job of it. “Yes. Yes they do.”

The moment hung, utterly silent. She was trying to not blink as well, but cracked, giggled, snorted, and laughed even harder at herself. Sesshomaru just smirked, as usual, and she hurriedly gathered herself when he stood. She followed suit.

“I am still going through the well.”

... Damn him... She had finally gotten in a good mood, too. “If you do, I will give you an absolutely horrible nickname.”

She had caught him off guard with the immature threat, and it showed in the faint pitch of his eyebrows. “You have already done a rather fine job with the 'Sesshy' title.”

“Believe me, there are worse,” she assured, going down the mental list and highlighting an irresistible one. “Such as Snuggle Bunny. Or better yet, Smexy-Sesshykins. Hell, I'll even call you a poodle.”

A wry grin graced his features, and despite the current issue she couldn't help but to think he was a gorgeous creature. To think she's never taken a picture of him. She should sue herself.

“I am sure that if something were to go horrifyingly wrong then my coming back to a lack of nicknames would be a minor relief.”

She crossed her arms, not humored. “Really. That's not funny. No matter how much you think so, it's not.” Great, he was hellbent and in an augmentative mood. The bad kind that left her feeling manipulated.

“Even if you seal the well, I will go back and I will speak to my father again,” he told her, calm and collected. She envied his self control. “Such an opportunity is not one to be ignored, and you know it.”

Kagome threw her arms down to her sides, hands fisted. “Darn it, Sesshomaru! You're thick headed enough to keep a freezer icy through the summer, you know that!?”

He shrugged, and she forced her shoulders to loosen. She was being irrational.

“I see no benefit in staying,” he stated. “Your resistance stems from an illogical fear, and your lack of trust is insulting.”

“Right back at you,” she snipped, thinking and not getting very far. “Will you at least wait a week?”

“Why a week?” he asked. She could almost hear him thinking that she was losing her mind.

'To give me time to sleep it over and hug everyone goodbye,' she thought. Suddenly some toast popped up, and the very bottoms of her feet tickled with the audacious thought to dance into her head. “So I can sleep on it, and feel better about your seemingly reckless need for action.” His lips -those beautiful, delicious lips. Yum.- parted to reply. She was going from attracted to moody and back far too quickly to be good for her. “Though, where I sleep has yet to be decided.”

Hah! She got his mouth to hang open for a second! She was half tempted to mirror it, but her own horror at her openness would have to wait until his expression wasn't so funny, so she just tried not to smile.

Kagome felt good when his mouth shut and Sesshomaru cleared his throat in an almost unheard tone. Who'd have thought he was really a male deep down inside? Oh, the possibilities. How exciting.

She was hopeful that her classic female tact would actually work, until it didn't. Sorta.

“I would be through the well and back before you would wake up, regardless of where you sleep.”

Why that insolent son of a... “Fine,” she gave in, figuring the boulder was going to roll downhill whether she liked it or not. “Do what you want. But only after you drop me off. I'm not about to wait around here for you, I don't even have any money for ramen, and this city is only good for shopping in five hundred.”

She felt cold when he remained silent, then burst to flaming life when she guessed at his- Ah-hum... male thoughts, and reacted to them. Kami, did she just offer to sleep over at his place? She did. But no. No, she was being ridiculous. She'd visit, but- But if she stayed the night, she was going back to that room she had used, and- Shit. And then, knowing her, she was going to stay up all night wondering if he'd sneak in like he had the one time she accidentally slapped him in the face. The bastard had deserved it, waking her up before the dawn even broke by stroking her side, of all things. She had enjoyed it. Check that, she had enjoyed them. She liked him touching her, and had taken great satisfaction in the slap. Then again, it really would be nice to sleep with his arms around her. Just so long as things didn't go too far. Which they may, she didn't fully trust herself. She trusted him to not become completely and uncontrollably enthralled, but- Oh, it was a sad, sad day when a woman thought she had less sexual restraint than a man... Dammit! She was a virgin, and that knee buckling look in his eyes -which was there, right now- was not going to change that. Nope. No matter how ungodly sexy, tempting, and forbidden it made him look. Strong, too. That was a definite bonus. Strong with determination and a fantastic array of muscles that she could just dig her teeth into. ... Oh, she was hopeless.

Kagome sensed that she was a nice, healthy shade of red now, and apparently sensing her internal turmoil Sesshomaru chuckled and with a blink on her part he back in her focus. Well, at least he was still there. Maybe she should push him through the well just to save face.

“You do realize that your innocence is entertaining,” he said more than asked, making her feel affronted. “It is also very attractive when pitted against your obvious desire.”

Her heated blood spread from her face and probably sank all the way down to redden her neck, too. He was playing his accursed games again. “I'm sure it is,” she replied, unable to think of anything else for a comeback other than to smack him as a means to change the conversation. If he'd only put his hands on her hips, maybe rocked a little, she'd feel happier. Not better, just a hell of a lot happier. Happy enough to let him nibble her ear, which he was growing fond of lately. It was a fun favor to return as well, and it reminded her of how ticklish he was in some places. Who'd have thought that that would be such a turn on. ... Ugh! How dare the room get hotter! And she needed to keep her mind on his desire to kill his dad, not her stupid, stupid spiraling emotions!

At that trickle of annoyance, she abruptly noticed that he was only a foot away and quickly stepped back out of instinct. When had he moved?

She stopped within his arm's reach, which was mostly due to his hands having caught her elbows, and then she was within chest reach and craning her head back to look up at his attentive, warm, take-me-now eyes. Wait, that last adjective was describing her, wasn't it... Kami, he was so good looking. Okay, maybe kissing wasn't a bad idea. No, yes, it was. Wait, what? Dammit, he should just kiss her to spare her from her thoughts. Then everything would be fine and dandy.

“Ah...” she began, forgetting what she was going to say when his warm hand suddenly brushed her cheek, meaning that her left elbow free. “Um, you can go through the well now. I'll be- Be just ducky, here.”

A smile bloomed on his face, and she just about had a bodily epiphany. Damn her hormones! “I thought you told me to take you home.”

She paled for a moment, thinking about silk sheets and whether or not they existed, then was struck by an idea. Home! That sounded GREAT! Yes! Sesshomaru wouldn't try anything in front of Sota! ... Right?? Who cares, it was worth a shot. “No, no!” she began, spinning out from him and whirling around to regain a visual. “I'll just go visit mom! My mom. Yes, of course my mom, we're not married or anything, why distinguish?” Her laugh sounded forced even to her own ears, but he only looked amused. “Um, so, yeah!” Kami, he was sexy... “You, you go back in time, kill your dad, and I'll see you in my time while I'm hanging out with my mom!”

Round two of toast popped up, and it quickly molded.

Kagome stopped, completely and entirely, and a noisy silence echoed in her head. “But-” The word hit the air and dropped like a dead bird. Something wasn't sounding right. “Wait. ... Sesshomaru? Sesshomaru, where did we go through the well? Just now?”

A vague show of worry shaded Sesshomaru's face when he alighted on the same thought. Kagome waited for him to say something. She didn't make a sound, not wanting to miss his reply. He'd have an answer, right? This misplaced sensation of dread... It was misplaced, because nothing so horrible could... Could it? Oh, no, what had happened?!

The world jerked, and after a blink she found herself sprawled back on the stairs, braced on a sore elbow and feeling a little dizzy. A white blob showed up in her unfocused line of sight, obscuring her view of nothing. Nothing. Yes, nothing. Nothing like this could happen. Not in a million years, no, because- Because there just wasn't a good enough reason to let it happen.

Wind howled faintly through the huge void in her mind, inflating her chest and stirring sensation, and she remembered it was called 'breathing'. Kagome turned her head, couldn't, and felt that her face was being held. Giving a start her sight suddenly sharpened, and the blob had concerned golden eyes.

“Kagome?”

He had such a tender voice, making her vision blur and ripple all over again. She violently bit her lower lip, pain jostling her nerves to try and distract her from her thoughts. She wouldn't cry. Dammit, she wouldn't!It all made sense though. Defined, logical, cold and wretched sense.

“Kagome, it was a fluke,” Sesshomaru was reassuring her, sounding calm and loud in the quiet yet not really making sense. “It will be fixed. Everything is fine. I will have the tree moved back.”

Moved back. Backwards. The well was going backwards, not forwards. Backward like the future, not forward like the past. It was all backwards, and so real and fascinating and terrifying and- She was trapped!

She felt fear break something very frail inside her, and there was a horrible sound at the same time that her throat shivered, filling her head with pain and horror and lost, lost, lost. She was trapped, and she was lost, and she was powerless, and this was infinitely worse than when the well had simply closed! It wasn't broken now, it was perfect and fine and correct and she was stuck. Forever.

Things stopped moving, which meant she hadn't noticed being in motion in the first place. A very small something that was wound tight in her chest loosened when a gentle and caring strength was folded around her, pulling at her curiosity and slowly sorting out her chaotic thoughts. She was jumbled. Confused. Wired and nigh disembodied with shock. But this was here. This was here, and real, and now, and 'this' was an unyielding protection that wouldn't leave. Or would it?

Numb arms reaching out and fumbling slightly, she latched herself to what she had. It tightened around her, refusing to let her go, and some petrification fled from the confines of her reality, giving room for other emotions and sensations. For thought.

A staggering onslaught of sensations struck her in an instant. She was touching silk, and warmth. Felt the rise and fall pattern of respiration and the dull tapping of a pulse against her own. Heard a hush that was sympathizing and yet understanding, and saw shimmering fur wink in the gloomy light as it brushed her cheek in the motion of her breath. She smelled the clean and musky scent of Sesshomaru, and tasted her own tears. She was crying? She was getting tears all over his fur.

“Calm down,” she heard him, his voice very low and soft, humming in the air. She realized she had a desperate grip on his torso and was seated in his lap, cradled protectively in his arms without a second thought on his part.

She bit her lip again when a small sob broke like a hiccup, and with the short suppression the pressure built and forced tears from her eyes. On her next breath she couldn't hold it, and feeling lonely and at a loss for words and actions she just cried against him until she couldn't anymore, thinking that she'd never see her family again.

------

The sun was down behind Mount Fuji when Kagome's sobs began to subside, leaving her worn and tired and drained. She even felt lighter in Sesshomaru's arms, like she had just lost something which served to define her.

The scent of her fear, tears, and hopelessness was thick on the air, smothering even the scent of the earth. It unsettled him immensely. He did not want her to be sad. Ever. He should be able to do something to prevent it, and he felt like he had failed in some way. When he needed to act, when she needed him, he could think of nothing better than to hold her and remain quiet. It grated at him to do nothing else, to feel powerless against the emotion which just finished escaping her, but what could he do? He had never been faced with this before. Consoling someone was not a thing he had been taught, and it most certainly did not come naturally.

She was whimpering brokenly now, curled up against him with her sleeve draped over her face, and he wondered when the unspoken vow of silence would be safe to break.

Lifting his right leg to take the place of his arm, which was a tad difficult while sitting sideways on the steps, he put his hand gingerly on her arm and stroked it reassuringly. It was a peculiar thing to see her so sad and so helpless, so completely vulnerable, when he had seen how strong she could be. This was almost enough to break the laws of nature, and so he continued to pet her, trying to coax her out of this depression. He wanted her to smile, and wanted to hear her laugh again. How to make the transition though was a complete and utter mystery. He didn't know the emotions of women well enough to change them.

A soft series of sobs continued to shake spontaneously from her as her hand shift underneath its sleeve to wipe her eyes before settling again. He could not tolerate this. She needed to get better. Now.

Standing was a slight challenge, but he managed and walked outside with her still in his arms. The sky was still light, but their surroundings were cast in the shadow of the volcano and it made her shiver.

“Sesshomaru?” she asked, her voice rasping like she had just gargled sand.

“Yes?” he asked, surprised that he had whispered. Jumping into the air a little more quickly than she seemed comfortable with he noted that while holding her he could move faster and decided to take advantage of it. He only had to support himself rather than the both of them, and so he flew quickly.

She felt so small when she burrowed closer to his chest, wanting to avoid the cold of the atmosphere. “Where're we going?”

That was an excellent question, and he made up his mind in an instant. He'd sacrifice face and -for the first time in hundreds of years- ask his mother what to do. His jaw clenched at the though, but if it helped in the end then he was fine with it. If not, then he would force himself to be.

“To the o-shiro,” he offered, feeling like he should explain himself and drawing a temporary blank. “You will be more at ease there.”

Her hold on him tightened, and he felt like a message was not getting through.

The barrier melted around him upon his arrival, allowing him to pass without complication, and to his immense surprise he saw his mother walking hurriedly out to the courtyard to meet him, Sheng not too far behind.

“What have you been doing?!” she seethed up at Sesshomaru, her glare gradually focusing on Kagome. “Oh, no... No, no, Sesshomaru!”

“I did nothing,” he replied honestly, somewhat curious over his lack of anger with her.

His mother waved her hands in a very frantic fashion. “Never mind that! Oh, Sesshomaru, you smell like tears. This is all wrong! Why did you not respond sooner!”

Respond? She had been calling him? Sesshomaru looked at Sheng for an answer, and the man looked a bit unnerved. What had happened?

“Sheng, take her,” Sesshomaru's mother ordered, sounding worried.

Sesshomaru stepped back when the man approached, growling while holding his presently frail intended closer.

“Sesshomaru?” Kagome asked when he made the noise and still looking at his mother as though fascinated.

“Kagome, there is a serious matter that Sesshomaru needs to attend to,” Sheng told her, giving Sesshomaru an understanding look yet retaining his hardened expression. “Will you come with me to your old quarters? The servants can draw you a bath, and I will make sure nothing happens to you until Sesshomaru returns.”

Frowning, Sesshomaru felt like that last part was said more for him than for the woman in his arms. Kagome nodded though, and it was with a feeling of losing her that he let her down. She wiped at her face, which was turned away from Sesshomaru, and Sheng gently touched her elbow and began to walk with her.

It was hard for Sesshomaru to keep himself at bay when his fingers simply twitched to beat the man for touching her.

“Did you not just hear me!” Li Hua demanded, her tone grabbing Sesshomaru's attention. His eyes remained fixed on Kagome though. “I said you have to go change! Your cousin and his mate are here!”

Kagome disappeared, and Sesshomaru regarded his mother, not reading the importance behind this yet. “Which cousin?”

“Your eldest,” she grumbled, walking off in the direction of Sesshomaru's quarters. “Come.”

The walk was short and full of her ordering the servants, and she closed his room's door behind him with a sharp smack.

“Disrobe,” she ordered. “You stink. The servants are already bringing some oil over to cover Kagome's scent.”

This was ridiculous, but he set his swords aside and undid the knot of his sash while asking her what his cousin was there for.

“Are you serious?!” she demanded, wheeling around from the wall built in with drawers with a folded haori in her hands. She was picking out his clothes? “Sesshomaru, get your thoughts straight and pay attention!” Not liking it, she replaced the fabric in its drawer and pulled open another, then shut it with a snap.

This was more than what he wanted to deal with, but perhaps she had a point. It was not every day that his cousin came, especially with a mate. He had found someone who tolerated him? Then the facts lined up as he let his hakama fall and stepped out of them, the layers of haori going to his mid thighs.

“Keep the last one on,” she told him, setting a heavy silk kimono on his bed. “It does not smell of her, and its warmth will make it seem you have been wearing this outfit for a while.”

“I know,” he replied while shedding the first haori, seeing she had gotten a dark blue kimono decorated in hers and her late mate's insignia. The hexagon belonged to his father, and the center-less camphor flower which rested inside it was from her house. It was customary that the designs of two renown houses be combined like the yÅkai being mated. Sesshomaru would keep the hexagon of his father as his own symbol, and by tradition his mate's insignia would fill it. It may very well remain empty.

“Then act like it,” she snipped, throwing a thicker sash on the bed in frustration. “Sesshomaru, he has been here for nearly two hours!”

“You worry too much,” Sesshomaru insulted her just as the door opened. The servant, likely knowing he was walking in on something too nasty for him to handle, knelt, put a tiny bottle on the floor, scooted back, bowed at the waist, closed the door, and hurried off. Sesshomaru picked the small container up easily by its middle between two fingers and removed the small cap with a sound 'pop'. It had not been used in a while.

“You know he is interested in seizing this land,” his mother bickered as Sesshomaru put his finger over the bottle's scentless opening and turned it. The oil was an odor killer, not a masker, and it did its job well. If he put more than six drops on he would smell like nothing. “How can you be so calm about this when you know he has the advantage of kin and mating status?”

Sesshomaru regarded her, smoothing the oil with his fingertip behind his ears then rubbing his hands together before running them through his hair a few times. He waited for his mother to nod, telling him that the smell of Kagome's emotions was covered well enough, and then replied. “He does have those advantages, however, everyone knows he is an irresponsible idiot.”

“Intelligence does not always matter,” his mother almost growled. She was quite angry, and yanked open a drawer and began ripping out tabi socks to occupy herself. He waited for her to realize that she needed to look for odori, not tabi. And to think she was telling him to gather himself.

“He will be back in China out of shame within two hours,” Sesshomaru commented, taking up the still folded kimono and examining it. He knew its sleeves were short, which would reveal his arms from the beginning of the elbow and down. A casual kimono worth its weight in gold, and one which would give off the impression of not needing to impress anyone.

“He is determined to stay,” she scoffed, finally tossing a black pair of odori at his feet as he pinched the kimono by the shoulders to let it unfold by itself. The silk was too thick to leave any obvious creases as it tumbled to its full length.

“I am more determined to make him leave,” Sesshomaru replied while donning the new garment and folding it left over right. Reaching for the sash, he paused at noting that it matched the kimono. He hated that, and his mother picked up on it.

“No complaints. Wear it or he will think less of you and spread word that you cannot even dress yourself appropriately.”

Jaw clenched, Sesshomaru picked it up and tied it in place, wondering how Kagome was fairing. When he sat to put on the odori, he couldn't help but to find it odd that his mother was looking at him in a contemplative manner.

“Pull your hair up,” she finally ordered.

Sesshomaru felt his eyes widen. “No.”

“Yes.”

“I do not have a mate,” he retorted bitterly, finishing with the last little buckle at the back of his ankle and standing. “And I will not feign engagement.”

“Sesshomaru, Kagome will mate you by spring, if not summer,” the intolerable woman waved the matter off. “Now stop your fussing and pull up your hair, least you look like a child.”

A child. That was the last thing he wanted to be called. “I will look like one regardless. He is double my age, after all.”

“He is one thousand three hundred and ninety seven,” she clarified with that annoying and useless accuracy of hers.

He gave a small humph. Sesshomaru was under eight hundred years of age, which made him young to get a mate anyway. Still, politics were politics, and being mated was a status boost, even if it was to a tree.

“Sesshomaru!” she yipped when he walked out and completely ignored the rarely used brush she had just found. He was not pulling up his hair, even if he had known that upon walking into the room in which his cousin and his mate had waited he would be given humored looks.

The warmed receiving room was too big for its purpose, giving ample room to settle things with a sword if need be. It was already well lit in preparation for the sun to fully set, and the long cushion encircled table was prepared with tea. Chinese tea, by the smell of it, and his visitors seemed to be enjoying it while looking him over.

Being the host, it was Sesshomaru's obligation to allow his cousin to initiate conversation, so he sat cross legged at the table separating them by its width rather than its length and waited for their judgment to pass. This gave him ample time to analyze his uninvited guests.

His cousin, eldest son of his uncle and heir to their family's terrain in China, had not changed much. Dressed in a simple and formal Chinese manner and sporting reds and yellows, he now kept a close-cut scraggly beard fixated around his boxy jaw and nothing over his thin upper lip, making him look absolutely ridiculous with his long black hair pulled up tightly. Sesshomaru supposed he had gotten swept up in another culture some time ago -perhaps Russian- and had a feeling that even the natives would have been delighted to see the poor imitation of their fashion before chasing him out of the country. Other than the joke on his cousin's face, the man looked the same since they last saw one another centuries ago. His vivid green eyes were hard yet ignorant, laughing in their sockets in a way that betrayed his lack of discipline with alcohol, and his skin was dark from far too much time meandering the land. Sesshomaru also preferred the outdoors but typically disciplined himself to his duties, which called for much time in scrolls and not chasing taken women through the garden on a sunny day.

How his cousin had found himself a mate with his womanizing history was beyond Sesshomaru. Perhaps she was of low class, or the best candidate from a house that was failing and needed the status boost of marrying into the dominant house of the warring sections of China. He considered as much as his eyes made the shift to her, and soon decided that the latter had a clean ring of accuracy to it. Dressed in black, she sported a dull brown mop of hair tied up and back into a fashion which should have been shackled to the island of England to die off with their presently excessive style. It looked like a natural imitation of a Pharaoh's Hedjet crown and was simply littered with strung pearls (which did not compliment the look at all). Her exceptionally pointed ears, hair, and thin neck were so heavily adorned with precious metals that her smile was dull in comparison, her blunt canines revealing her blood history. She descended at some point in time from a human. Definitely lower class, and her ancestors had been fairly weak blooded to not overwhelm the trait by her generation. Even Inuyasha sported sharper eye teeth than she did.

Sesshomaru came to the conclusion that she married into the family for status and financial benefit. Despite her teeth, her smile was full and filled with a lowly pride, and despite being a mate and therefore his cousin's equal, she sat to his left and slightly back. She was not respected in the relationship, but her selfishness apparently sated the lack of emotional love. Sesshomaru could almost pity her. As soon as she got with pup, his cousin would most likely break their relation and leave her for the next best thing in bed. Gaining and losing mates frequently would not help his image, but he was one to consider himself too high above others to be pulled down by their judgment. He really was an idiot.

Why Sesshomaru's mother had been so worried was beyond him. These two were worth nothing, let alone his time, and it angered him that he was there instead of comforting Kagome.

“Well met, Sesshomaru.”

Keeping his face smooth as his cousin inclined his head to him shallowly, his mate doing the bare minimum as well, Sesshomaru pondered over the obvious show of disrespect. He was not given his title, which, despite the pleasant expressions stamped onto their faces, was a grave insult. One he would gladly return.

“Indeed. What brings you to Japan, Kueng? Is LÃ©i Zhuang not feeling well?” Slipping into Mandarin again had an alienated taste to it, but there were no complications. Sheng would spontaneously change the language in meetings just to hear it, though Sesshomaru was fairly certain that retaining his fluency played a part in it. Even yÅkai forget things, given time.

Kueng's eyes tightened but still sparkled with an illegitimate mirth. His mate was positively livid, but she could drop dead and Sesshomaru was sure that her mate would not notice, let alone him. Her anger was walled off from them by her lack of backbone and warrant of respect, and that was just fine.

“My father is alive and healthy,” Kueng replied, putting a slight emphasis on 'alive' to try and bother Sesshomaru but otherwise sounding politically polite and decent. It had no effect, to say the least. “It was by his recommendation that I pay you a visit, cousin.”

In other words, LÃ©i Zhuang had grown tired of his sons presence and decided to banish him for a time in the most convenient way possible. What better to place to put him than on an island to look for a flaw in Sesshomaru's control over his father's death-abdicated title? Perhaps this was not all an effort to wrest Sesshomaru's land and inheritance from him after all, though he would truthfully wish for that to be the case over having to 'babysit' the fool for even the night. Today was not a good day, and all he wanted to do was drop Kueng and his whore on the coast and go to Kagome. It still bothered him that she was not happy when they parted ways, and that most likely meant that she was still not happy and crying and that damn Sheng was probably patting her back.

A combination of weariness and anger slipped from Sesshomaru in a rough sigh before he caught it, and he cursed himself as Kueng's eyebrows inclined slightly and his wench grinned bluntly. They thought they were getting to him; which they were, but not drastically enough to deserve a show of it. “That is good to hear.” Really, it was. If LÃ©i Zhuang died, then Kueng would be obligated to drag China's human economy through the dirt. “If you are here on conversational terms, then I will arrange a place for you to rest until a more appropriate time for casual socializing arrives,” Sesshomaru informed, stilling his foot when it twitched once with irritation under the opposite knee. He presumed at least a small portion of annoyance stemmed from wearing the kimono. He preferred hakama, for various reasons. Kimono were indeed unisex -until specifically designed-, but sitting cross legged was a little more... Well, it was easy and fine and perfectly decent. It just felt peculiar with how the fabric pressed around his knees.

Surprisingly, Kueng nodded in acceptance, especially after an apparent two hour wait. “Very well. I am liable to state before our parting that you are being held to tradition, Sesshomaru. Your charming mother has nullified the first few centuries for you, however, now that you are of age, your duty is your own.” His mate stood with him, and she reached out to straighten his sleeve before stopping herself and folding her hands over her lap. Kueng had not noticed and he continued with his unimportant speech. “Tradition does not die across salty waters for yÅkai.”

'Said 'salty waters' is more commonly known as the Sea of Japan' Sesshomaru thought as he nodded in a shadow of an angle, a mere sign of understanding, and regained his feet. He knew. He did not like the laws, but he knew them and would abide by them. Having kept them in mind until now was a completely different matter.

Kueng nodded as well, lifting his arm fractionally to beacon his woman to it like a trained hawk, and together they left in the wake of a knowledgeable servant.

Sesshomaru waited until their footsteps faded into nothing before turning and hurrying out the door. He could not scent Kagome on the air in this part of the o-shiro, but he knew where to find her. While walking down the clear outdoor walkway which connected the two buildings he saw a servant step aside and bow her head to hide a faint smile, and for some reason that action did not bother him in the least. In fact, with Kueng there, they were all most likely ecstatic that Kagome was at the o-shiro again. Upon entering one one of four housing buildings and being greeted with Kagome's scent, even more servants tired to hide smiles. It eased him to know their acclimation with having a human miko in their midsts. Sesshomaru knew that many would resist the idea of him pursuing her, but so long as her presence was of no issue he was fine. Acceptance came with time. Not all the servants had children she could charm, after all.

When Sesshomaru arrived Sheng was standing outside the mostly closed door leading into Kagome's quarters, as the room was commonly referred to now.

“That was rather quick,” a visibly calmer Sheng commented in a low voice, leading Sesshomaru to guess that Kagome had managed to calm down or even fall asleep. A glance through the ajar door into the dark room confirmed the latter, and an unheeded tension left Sesshomaru in an exhale to know she was relaxed enough to sleep. Even the most exhausted would not find comfort on uncertain grounds.

“LÃ©i Zhuang is more interested in a sitter than in Japan.”

Sheng nodded. “That is good, to some degree... How long will he be here?”

Sesshomaru fully slid close the door to block the conversation. “Too long.”

The response was an old sounding chuckle. “Still haven't learned to respect him I see?”

“Indeed not.” The topic was not pleasant, even a little depressing, but now was a good time to indulge its release if ever. “He mentioned holding me to tradition.”

Again, Sheng nodded. He was most likely expecting as much. “I see. That doesn't mean I'll be giving back control just yet. You seem fond of leaving whenever you please of late anyway.”

“Hn,” Sesshomaru intoned. He did not want full control just yet. The freedom was much desired since his time was mostly devoted to Kagome. In fact, his being held to tradition would be pushing him to court her even more now.

Shifting his stance, Sheng glanced at where the gap in the doors used to be and returned his attention to Sesshomaru. “You do know the details of that law, correct?”

“Yes.”

“Good,” he said. “Then you also know that by late summer she needs to make up her mind.”

This summer? That was it? Where had all the time gone? He soon remembered exactly where it went, and a foreign emotion stirred in Sesshomaru and he felt the corners of his mouth tense to smile. He had been interested in Kagome for nearly four and a half years? That was a sinful amount of time, but had been enjoyed.

Sheng almost abruptly dismissed himself, patting Sesshomaru's shoulder in passing twice in an uncharacteristic fashion. He thought for a meaning behind it, and finding none by the time Sheng turned a corner he dismissed it and eased the door open.

The lack of illumination enforced the fact that night had fully settled in already, and Sesshomaru's eyes adjusted quickly when he cut off the light from the hall. The floor was brushed with a powdery glow near the doors which led to the small private yard, its intensity stating that there was still ample snow outside, and possibly a mostly full moon, the last marking that Bashamon's seal needed to be strengthened again soon.

The thick blanket which covered the elevated futon bed did not stir, even as Sesshomaru padded over and knelt to see Kagome's expression. She was asleep on her side, her head pillowed by a blanket folded to lay across the upper portion of the futon like a makeshift pillow -since she absolutely refused to use the head rests which were typically used in this day and age- and her eyes were calm.

His shoulders loosened at the sight of her being comfortably asleep and snuggled so deeply under the blanket that her mouth and nose were covered. She was fine for now, yet he had the feeling that she would be filled with renewed sorrow upon waking.

Standing, Sesshomaru decided to be content with things being the way they were and walked for the door. He changed his mind before opening it though. Why would he leave if he would wonder how she was doing and itch to come back? Also, she would wake being sad, no matter who greeted her, and humorously enough he would hate to not be there for it.

Deciding to stay and wait, Sesshomaru resigned himself to sit against the wall and think about his new predicament. Sheng said late summer, and that did not seem like enough time to convince Kagome to become Sesshomaru's mate. There was the matter of the well to resolve, his cousin to keep tabs on, and the overall responsibilities of being a lord which already would have taken up most of his time if Sheng had not seized the almost dreadful duty. Sesshomaru owed the man a few years of leave for his services.

Folding his arms one over the other, his sleeves obviously short, he realized that he was watching the gentle movement which indicated Kagome's breathing. He could hear it, her soft exchange of air stroking his awareness with a tranquilizing regularity. Her scent was different as well, losing emotion and becoming just warm and alive with sleep. It was almost enough to drag his thoughts away for a later time, but they persisted with a prominent and scary one. If Kagome denied him and said that she would not be his mate by late summer, then Sesshomaru would be left to wait for a mate his mother chose. An arrangement, like her own love life.

He stifled a rising shudder. Giving up everything, right down to his bloodline, to pursue his own interests seemed far more tantalizing than being placed into a forced relationship.

The rustle of fabric drew his attention back to the low laying bed, and he watched as Kagome shifted before breathing in and out deeply, her sleep undisturbed. Sesshomaru did nothing to avoid the yawn that crept out and into existence, and when it passed he kept his eyes closed and his head up.

He humored himself. If she said no to him, and if the unfavorable engagement did take place, then he could form a harem and keep to tradition in that manner. He had a feeling that his body would be eased, like what Chole's services had alloted, but his heart would not. There was a definite difference between physical and emotional love, and why Kagome presumed the two to be one in the same escaped him completely. It had taken him a long time to know exactly why she was so mad with him over Chole. Women had an easily unleashed jealous streak which was longer, wider, and older than the Nile, but he hadn't expected her reasons behind it. To him, it was silly to even compare the two forms of love, but since it bothered her he decided to play by her rules. Lovemaking was nice, but he had only felt the desire to bond to another with her. She was right when she had said that she was the one to make him laugh, and that fact bore more truth and meaning to it than she seemed to notice when she had said it.

Still, despite all things in time, she didn't trust him. She did with her life and her body, to some extent, but she did not trust him to keep safe her emotions. That he had already failed before she acknowledged giving them over to him was disconcerting, and the fact that she had already surrendered most of her love and trust to him was promising, but what worried him was that she did not want to be aware of their relationship.

Tired, Sesshomaru lowered his head and shifted his shoulders, listening to the footsteps of an approaching servant pause and then tip-toe the other way. At least Kagome would have peace while he was there with her, even if he was just sitting around and thinking on unsettling matters. Yes, she accepted that she was 'fond' of him, and that he was 'fond' of her, and she permitted that they expressed as much with ample touching and kissing that would send them both reeling in sensation, but she seemed unaware of the fact that people who did such things more than once were more than fond of one another. How to show her that fact had been challenging him for a long time now. It was not something he could just tell her in expectation that things would flow from that point on. She had to be the one to discover it, no matter how long it took, and if he had to make drastic decisions by the end of summer then... Well, then he would be left to think about his interests again. There were limits after all. Even in love. If Kagome would ask that he give up his life, everything that he had ever worked for, just so she could prolong shuffling her feet indecisively, then yes, he would have to think things over. No matter how much he would not want to.

The images of his thoughts began to last longer and became sensible in transition, and the courtesy driven obligation to leave before risking falling asleep appeared and then vanished. He was comfortable enough and enjoyed being with her, even if she was eight feet away. As he continued fantasizing possibilities his senses began to dull, but he remained very aware of her as her presence calmed him and encouraged that he relax with her.

----------

If Sheng had thought that intercepting Sesshomaru's mother was difficult, keeping her away from her son for a verbal lashing was even harder. He figured out through her feminine rantings that she had seen LÃ©i Kueng and his mate being escorted away after -maybe- ten minutes of talking with Sesshomaru. That was far too short a meeting to bear anything good. She also complained about Sesshomaru being too thickheaded for his own good, and Sheng was amused that it had been over pulling up his hair as though he were claimed and due to mate. He could have gotten away with it, but Sheng sided with Sesshomaru on that one. Lying also made bad promises for the future.

Sheng glanced at her tea again, wondering if it had begun to boil yet in the woman's grip. “Well, my dear,” he started with a grin, being the only one who could find amusement in the present circumstances and annoy her with it. She needed a healthy dose of irritation, and no one there had the nerve to serve it but him. Well, perhaps 'nerve' was not the right term. 'Audacity', possibly, or even 'invincibility'? Most likely the latter, since they were in that room alone. “Would you care to indulge my old ears with your worries?”

That tea cup of hers came down hard enough to crack, but not break. That was a good cup, too. “That insufferable son of mine,” she growled, her right set of fingers tapping rhythmically against the fissured ceramic as though teasing its new decrepit state. “I swear, if he had it his way, our whole bloodline of relatives would turn into a bloodbath before politics could be discussed.”

Sheng chuckled, wishing his tea would turn to sake and soon becoming disappointed. So he spoke rather than drank. “Even as a child he hated politics. His father should have not become so absorbed.”

Her gaze hardened, but he was used to such displays. “Are you insinuating that my mate was a bad role model?”

Thinking on that for a second, he answered “yes, on that note” and took a drink, grimacing inside. Sake was so much better. After a few years of learning to enjoy it.

Her threat was jostled by the slight widening of her eyes, completely ruined. “He was a good man, and you know that.”

Sheng grinned openly. “Are you insinuating that I would call my best friend otherwise, little Li Hua?”

A vexed sigh escaped her. He only called her that because she sincerely detested it, as had her mate despised his. Old Tao must have a more self-amusing reason for nicknames. After all, it got both laughter and groans during boring meetings. Kagome pulled top rank on second naming though with 'Sesshy'.

“I merely suggest that Sesshomaru's desire to not emulate his father stretches into his drive to fulfill the duties of a lord,” Sheng informed blandly, leaning to set his cup a little further than arm's length away from himself. Tea was fine, just not the herbal sort. Which was pretty much all of them. “He is still rather young for the position, after all. Your mate, with half the land, struggled enough at the mature age of one thousand twenty four. So much so that he had me start up the council and head it. Now we are to expect Sesshomaru, at little more than seven hundred, to rein over twice the terrain, grow accustomed to his responsibilities, and pursue his love interest all of a sudden within a few months? I must admit, in his shoes I would be having heart failure nightly. Barely sleep at all with all the paperwork as it is.”

The Lady of the o-shiro blinked elegantly at him. “You have quite the talent for turning the conversation...”

“That I do,” he agreed with a nod.

She tapped her cup a few more times, the sharp points of her little claws scraping the crack with unconscious interest. “Trust me, I know it is a lot, but surely he can put his feet on the ground long enough to apply more common sense to his decisions.”

Yes, that would make life easier for the rest of those in power, but it was not Sesshomaru's nature to think of everyone else.

“Ever since he disappeared that month,” Li Hua slowly pondered aloud to herself, dropping them into a few seconds of silence. “Hm. I still do not know that whole story.”

“Nor do I,” he stated to avoid the imminent inquiry.

Taking a sip of tea, she continued. “Was he not also a tad worried over the security of the o-shiro?”

Sheng felt himself smirk while he shook his head. “If you want answers, I suggest you ask him yourself.”

She scoffed sarcastically, the noise clearly saying 'yeah, right'. “The only information I could ever pry from him was when he could be manipulated at a young age. And once after he dismissed a whore.”

“Chiro?”

She almost snorted her drink through her nose and came centimeters away from smashing it against the table again, refraining and putting it down gently the rest of the way. “No,” she replied firmly, insulted. “The women who visited before Chiro was established in his room.”

Sheng gave an intrigued hum.

“And I am not telling you what he told me.”

“Such a tease,” he muttered, knowing she could hear. That made the corner of her mouth twitch with quickly suppressed mirth, and she sent her sight elsewhere.

“I just have trouble accepting these problems. Kagome is a good girl, and she brings out a better side in Sesshomaru, but-” She cut herself off, as though expecting him to do it.

“... But?” he prompted at her lack of continuation.

“Oh, Sheng...” she breathed in a small sound of confusion, shaking her head lethargically while addressing a wall. “Why have they not mated yet?”

He could have barked with laughter, and would have if she had promised to not harm him for it. Instead he reached a short ways and patted her wrist, her hands still on that cup, and her eyes flicked to his.

“They will,” he reassured. “Someday. And I am sure she will be red for a month and Sesshomaru positively ecstatic, if that is imaginable.”

Li Hua gave a humored hum to that, thumbs working the ceramic in her hands. “If I had arranged a marriage, things would be so much easier.”

“Maybe,” Sheng agreed. “This is a good decision for him to make though. I am certain he shares some of your doubts. No man is devoid of discouragement and uncertainty.”

Sheng flinched when a pair of hands abruptly smacked the tabletop, and peering from his peripheral he was graced with the sight of a very displeased young woman.

“He is having second thoughts?” she seethed calmly, her deadly still eyes trained for his response as her nails slowly itching little furrows into the lacquered wood of the tabletop.

Sheng's back broke into a sudden sweat, and when he faced her and opened his mouth a very unexpected and unmanly giggle cracked out and promptly died. “I- wouldn't put it that way.”

She took her nails out of the table, but that meant they were pointing at him instead, and he preferred the physical stated of being unscathed.

“Then in which way would you?” she inquired, void of emotion and still not blinking.

He felt as though he should be in his room and drinking rather than a table away from a woman who was one eye-twitch away from demolishing that poor little cup. Sesshomaru could be scary, yes, but his mother was simply terrifying with the right swing of her mood. He pondered on what would happen if he let her leave, and gave a very well hidden start over how cold the room suddenly got. No, that would not be a very good idea to reveal to Kagome what she could become related to...

Thankfully, for the ungrateful, Sheng had quite the immunity against fear and possible loss of pride. “You do know that asking him to put his hair up was going too far, correct?”

----------

Kagome, stirring awake for no better reason than she could, briefly imagined that she had been bitten by the mosquito from hell. Her face felt swollen, her mind slow and addled, and her limbs were far too heavy to enjoy moving. A morbid grief crouched over the doorway of consciousness, waiting for her to fully wake up and remember something important but so far forgotten.

She wondered vaguely while shifting under her blanket what had woken her up. There was no alarm screaming that she was late for class, nor the harsh harass of crickets from sleeping under the canopy of trees, nor was Sota pounding on her door before barging in anyway. In fact, it was all very quiet, warm, comfortable, and entirely escaping her in terms of location.

She knew her face had puffed up slightly by how thick her eyelids were, and the surroundings were a very general blur of night. She blinked a few times to no prevail, then finally rubbing her eyes free from the film she looked around again and froze with shock before figuring out where she was.

When did she come back to the o-shiro? Oh, wait, was Sheng still there? He had been a minute ago, though now all the oil lamps were pinched to death and the room was obscured with shades of gray and fuzzy lines.

She groggily groaned in protest while moving an elbow under herself to have a look around and see if Sheng was just leaving. She caught a pair of golden eyes instead, and after her initial shock of seeing them she relaxed. It was Sesshomaru, and there was an interesting softness on his face, like he had just woken up. Had he been sleeping? There??

Realization as to why she was back at the o-shiro suddenly came crashing down, landing on her heart and pulling it towards the floor. She remembered the tears she had shed, and that the well would not be sending her to the future anymore. Her eyes stung anew, but she recalled that Sesshomaru promised to do his best in fixing the problem, and quelled the rising desire to weep.

“How do you feel?”

Her attention went back to him and she offered a weak smile, blinking the trace of tears dry. “Pretty bad, actually.” She didn't have the heart to tell him that her world wanted to cave in. Would she ever see her family again? Her friends? Television? No, she wasn't going to think about that. She'd be fine, and everything would work out in the end. She had to trust, because if she didn't then she'd be crying herself to death. “But I'm fine. I'll be fine.”

She looked up and saw Sesshomaru watching her, most likely weighing her expression against her scent to evaluate her emotion. He probably knew that she felt like dirt and would randomly cry for the next week before her resolve settled fully on hope, but what did she know? She never asked him how his senses worked.

He stood, and she watched with a dropping sensation of dread when he glanced quickly at the door. “Don't go.” She had breathed it, barely even whispered. It was supposed to just be a thought, but it was there, and he had heard it. She knew he heard her, because his gaze immediately joined hers again.

His stare was always a heavy weight to bear. It was strong, and always the shimmer of a predator lay in its depths, but right now she relaxed when he looked to her. Deep down she knew his strength was her protection, and his deadliness the weapon he'd unleash on those who would hurt her. A blush tingled her cheeks at that thought, but right now she was more grateful than embarrassed. She wanted to feel that right now. She wanted to be able to rely on him, and not be shy about it. After all, she deserved to be loved and to be someone's first priority in life, but she needed to return what was given and fill it with trust or it would die.

Kagome watched as her free hand grabbed the edge of the blanket of its own accord, and with a flick of the wrist sent it folding back over itself. She met Sesshomaru's eyes when he didn't move, and she didn't feel shy. “I don't want to be alone right now. Will you stay with me?”

She thought she should be flaming red for asking him to join her in bed, or at the very least be stammering over her words, but her voice was a little numb at the moment and she wanted him to be with her. She didn't want to be left behind.

Kagome, still on her elbow, watched him walk over silently and calmly ease onto the bed, hands first. She had never seen him in a kimono before, and it was hidden by the blanket while she was still examining it. Focusing on his face, and on his gentle gaze as his position mirrored hers, she slowly began to feel better. The weight of his hand rested on her side, above her hip and not imposing, and in a seemingly quick motion she put her face to his chest and hugged her arms around his torso, giving him what she wanted as her insecurity hummed with sudden tension. She needed his reassurance. To be wrapped in his arms again and held away from reality. Just for a while. She just wanted to world to shrink to the two of them, and to relish in its simplicity and in the love she knew was there.

She could have sobbed with happiness when he shifted off his elbow and rested, her head settling on his arm while its twin wrapped around her back and held her tightly against him. She pressed into his body, his warmth seeping through her and his strength making her feel small yet sheltered. And loved. His presence banished her worries, woes, and the wounds of uncertainty. She moved, fitting herself against him and wanting to become lost in the moment and feeling. Passion surged to life in her, brimming and telling her this was good and right and that no matter how much she shied away from it she really did love him. His breath stirred her hair as she nuzzled into his neck, hugging him firmly. The strong and bonding emotion throbbed for attention when she acknowledged that it was okay for her to reveal weakness right now, to him. He was there for her, like she had asked. She wanted to trust him, and wanted to sift away her stress through him in exchange that he would know that she was leaning heavily on him. For some reason though, she was okay with him knowing. She actually looked forward to it.

“I'm scared,” she admitted softly, seeing him through closed eyes as his hand rubbed soothingly between her shoulder blades. Her tears remained at bay. “I want to see my family again, but if you move the tree again, will I be stuck four more years in the future?”

He inhaled deeply, her closeness making the sensation her own as she felt and heard it almost first hand, and she repeated him, calming a little. “I do not know.”

She wasn't sad when there was no answer, and her hopes didn't die. It felt good to know he was listening to her. She was just happy he was there and supporting her. “Okay.”

A small hum came from him, resonating warmly through her, and her grip on him loosened a little. “Would you like to try, despite the consequences?”

Her fingers flexed, gathering his kimono into her grasp and threatening to never let go. “I don't know. I don't want to be trapped on either side of the well. And I don't know how many times the tree can handle being moved.”

She released a pent up breath as his hand continued to stroke her back, and she rested in his arms. Her lips touched his neck, and through their sensitivity she felt his pulse, liking it. It was slower than hers, and she blamed his lifespan for that. She tried to not move and to breathe more softly, just to make sure she didn't miss the next beat.

His hand moved from her back to her head, still moving steadily, smoothing away her unease. She didn't know he could do that. His voice was a low rumble through her, illogically relaxing. “I am still willing to teach you how to live longer.”

She had forgotten that. The shock didn't open her eyes, but it did stir her from a weariness she hadn't noticed. “What do you mean?” She knew what he said, but the thought was still foreign to her.

His fingers were brushing through her hair, slow and not tugging enough to disturb her in the slightest. It felt good, like his sedated pulse against her lips when she found it again. “You can extend your life, like I do,” he explained softly. “Then you would not have to worry about being trapped, merely patient.”

'For five hundred years?' she thought sleepily, now listening to his breathing as well. Everything was so slow with him. She wouldn't be surprised if he sometimes breathed just to have enough air to talk. Did he ever get lightheaded from talking too much if that were the case?

Kagome realized there had been a silence when he gently cracked it. “I will help you in any way I can with whatever you decide.”

“Mm,” she accepted his offer, sighing faintly when his arm settled to her back again in a light and constant hug. She was small, warm, safe, and so very tired. Being cradled in his care, she accepted that she was going to fall asleep in his arms, and a small smile spread across her mouth as a little voice in her head began singing. The fingers of her memory cupped around her emotions, encasing them in a diamond box for her to feel time and time again. Her arms were loose around his waist, making sure he wouldn't leave without her knowing, and she mentally watched the last threads of consciousness slowly tuck themselves away for the night.

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A/N: Aaaaaaaaaaaw... It got cute. Thumbs up or thumbs down?

Again, I openly admit that it may be a month or a little more before I update again. I wish that weren't the case, but having a life and responsibilities takes time away from writing. Hopefully the content will make up for the wait!

Thanks for sticking with me, everyone! And as always, I'll love you for reviewing! :D