InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Sacrifice ❯ Sacrifice ( Prologue )

 

 

My name is Kagome Higurashi. But I'm not sure that matters anymore. Fours years ago I think it would've meant everything to me. A name is who a person is right?...Wrong.

 

Four years ago…four years ago I was Kagome Higurashi. Then on that fateful day, my fifteenth birthday to be precise, I was pulled into the sacred old dried up well on my family's shrine. The Bone Eater's Well it was called. That day I stopped being Kagome Higurashi, I just didn't realize it. That day I met Inuyasha, that day I met Kaede, that day…that day I became Kikyou's Reincarnation. Why do I write it like that you ask…in a way I guess it became my name.

 

Sometimes I wonder if Kagome Higurashi ever existed or if I was always just Kikyou's Reincarnation. But you wouldn't understand that would you? No you're just a diary. A book full of blank pages for me to write my thoughts in. Why am I laughing? Because I think that's all I was here. A diary. A book filled with blank pages for my friends to write their thoughts in, and every one of them thought it was so *neat* that I was Kikyou's Reincarnation. Sometimes I wonder if they even knew *me*, knew Kagome. But I guess it doesn't matter now, does it?

 

Do you know what today is? Today is my nineteenth birthday…none of them remembered. Earlier I thought, well maybe they had something planned for later, but it's almost midnight now. There's no more later left. We've spent four weeks hunting the jewel shards, and two weeks ago we fought Naraku and won. I sit here, looking at this damned jewel hanging around my neck. It mocks me, it laughs at me. My friends…they say that the who ever comes into contact with the jewel, that their lives are damaged somehow, made miserable somehow.

 

I guess that's true - no, I know it is. Inuyasha lost Kikyou, the love of his life. He's never been able to let go of her, no matter how much I've loved him. Miroku has had to bear the curse of the wind tunnel, the void in his hand. It was created first in the right hand of his grandfather by Naraku, then past down to his father and eventually to Miroku. Sango…poor Sango, she lost the most I think. She lost her brother, her family, her entire village…Me? Does it matter what I lost? What right do I have to complain? Everyone lost someone they loved. I didn't…That's not true…Somewhere along the way…I lost myself.

 

I sit here wearing this stupid high school uniform and you want to know why? I wear it because I want to remember who I am. That makes me laugh, sad though the sound is. How can I remember who I am, when I don't even know who I am? No one knows, no one sees. I got too good at perfecting it. Paste a smile on my face, bounce around, act all cheerful, be happy when all you want to do is cry. I've kept up this act for three years. Yeah, three years…it's a long time. But it's ok now. I'm going to make it ok.

 

You see, I have to be the one to purify the jewel. I have to be the one to make the wish. And I'm going to. That's why I came out here. I don't know if anyone will find this, or even read it for that matter. But this is kind of like a farewell letter, really cheery one it is too huh? Feh. Yeah I picked that up from Inuyasha.

 

Inuyasha…He lost so much. He lost the woman he loved. The woman who loved and maybe even still loves him back. All because of this stupid little stone. Sango lost her family, her brother. Shippou lost his father. Kouga lost his tribe, well a lot of them anyway, most of them. Kagura lost her heart, but that's been returned already. Kikyou lost her life. But it's ok; I'm going to make it all ok. Don't mourn for me dear diary, this is the one thing, the only thing I've done right.

 

Do you think they'll miss me - once I'm gone? I don't know, I don't know if they will or not. It's a strange feeling not knowing whether or not your friends will miss you once you're not there anymore. But then again, if I have to wonder if they'll miss me, than how much of an impact could I have really had on them? Not much I guess. I'll miss them though, but…well, it's better this way. Everyone will be happy. I know they will. They'll be free…Goodbye.

 

 

Inuyasha sat upon the ground, the same place he'd found the little book nearly a week ago, on the same day Kagome had gone missing. On the same day that Kikyou had returned to him - alive. The same day Kohaku had returned to Sango - alive. The same day Shippou's father had mysteriously shown up - alive. The same day Kouga's lost men had reappeared - alive. The same day Miroku and Sango finally confessed their love for each other. The same day the sobbing hanyou was going to admit his love to the little time traveling miko.

 

He hadn't read her diary before and he wasn't sure what had possessed him to do it now, but…he'd wanted to know what had happened to Kagome. He thought he might find some clue as to where she had gone. Now he knew. She had given up her life, made a wish on the jewel, and brought the dead back to life, given everyone new hope. She hadn't been found because there was nothing to be found. She was gone.

 

Now as he sat there sobbing he wished he had never read that final page. Never read her final thoughts. He could still smell her tears upon the page, still smell her sadness. How could she not know how important she was to them all? To him? Had she really thought that they thought her nothing more than Kikyou's reincarnation?

 

“St-st-stupid girl!” he sobbed brokenly.

 

“Hey mutt face where's Kag - Inuyasha?” Kouga asked as he stepped cautiously closer to the hunched and sobbing hanyou clutching a little black book with strange binding so very close to his chest. “What's wrong?”

 

“Kagome's gone,” Inuyasha said brokenly and tossed the diary at the wolf's feet. “Read it for yourself,” he sobbed before getting up and stomping away.

 

Kagome was gone. She had made the ultimate sacrifice.