InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Sedition of Will ❯ The Predatory Mind ( Chapter 7 )

Sedition of Will

“The Predatory Mind”

 

If the clouds had looked ominous before, they were simply livid now. Fat raindrops the size of marbles raged down from the sky on the backs of the travelers. Rin held her traveling pack to her chest and tried to shelter herself in the lee of the dragon's great body. They had left the thick of the forest and were now traveling on a muddy road in the countryside. Trees and greenery still scattered the grassy hillsides but the terrain lacked the untamed feel of the wild forest. Rin nearly slipped in the mud and she bumped against Jakken, who scolded her and told her to be more careful. She returned his harsh tone with a sneer. They were all completely soaked and feeling quite despondent. Rin's body was cramped with fatigue and the waterlogged clothes were only exasperating the discomfort. She came to resent her usually soft robe as it stuck to her skin like a wet paper bag. Even Ah-Un's seemed to take slow cranky steps as though he dragged a sack of stones behind him. Only Sesshoumaru seemed unfazed by the rain. He strode ahead of them silently with impassive majesty, his long white hair sweeping behind him. Suddenly paused and looked up the craggy hillside studiously. His followers stopped to watch him leap into the air. Sesshoumaru sailed gracefully through the water thick air, the tail of his long fur mantle whipping behind him. Rin blinked as he seemed to disappear into the rocky incline. He appeared a moment later and gazed down at his troupe. Sesshoumaru raised an open palm and summoned them. Realization dawned.

 

“A cave!” Rin cried, relief washing over her. They climbed up the slope to an enormous gaping mouth in the side of the earth. Jakken breathed a sigh of relief.

 

“An excellent find my lord!” He trilled waving his staff exuberantly. Ah-Un gave himself a thorough shake, covering Rin in a fresh shower of water. She tried to give the dragon an impatient look, but she was simply too glad to be out of the weather to manage a very convincing glare. Ah-Un hummed in mirth and she surrendered, laughing softly and giving him a thorough scratch behind the ears. Rin set down her damp pack and huffed. She was still soaked from head to toe. Sesshoumaru gathered his thick mane in his hands and wrung it tightly, squeezing the majority of water onto the stone floor. This didn't seem like a bad idea to Rin and she did the same. Sesshoumaru settled cross legged by the mouth of the cave with his back to the others, content to watch the rain in silence. Jakken was already bustling about the cave looking for driftwood to start a fire and Rin went to help him. The cave floor was littered with branches and debris blown in by the wind over the years. Rin even thought she saw what looked like heaped bones in a dark corner of the cavern and quickly averted her eyes. Together they dragged a sizable pile of dry wood together. Jakken tipped his ancient staff to the planks and they soon had a bright crackling fire. He slumped down by the fresh warmth and closed his big yellow eyes. A twinge of worry tugged Rin and she was about to ask if he was alright when the sound of his steady snore met her ears. She grinned knowingly. Poor Jakken was probably more tired than he looked. The damp weather seeped into his old imp bones more than he liked to admit. Rin wondered just how old he really was.

 

She supposed when she thought of the strange toadish creature Rin considered him more like a brother than anything else. They certainly bickered like siblings would. Though when push came to shove, they both genuinely cared about the others' welfare. More than once Jakken had stood up in her defense in the face of danger. Certainly Sesshoumaru would have been enraged if any harm came to the girl, but Jakken acted out of his own concern as well. Rin smiled pleasantly and patted the steeple of Jakken's tall black hat. Ah-Un settled his massive body by the fire and heaved a tired sigh. Rin watched the crackling flames for a few long moments. The rain was still raging outside and she was aware of her lord still sitting sentinel by the cave mouth. She smoothed her kimono and moved across the cave to join him.

 

Sesshoumaru felt the girl approach long before she settled down next to him. Though he didn't look at her he knew she was gazing outside at the rain just as he was. Her clean heady scent filled his nose and he resisted the slight urge to inhale deeper. He could pick Rin's singular aroma out anywhere. It reminded him vaguely of a flower, though he could never put his finger on exactly what variety. Sometimes it seemed like the first bloom of a spring lotus, then perhaps later that day he'd decide it was more akin to that of a branch of honeysuckle. It was always a refreshing, clean scent that he found pleasing. Rin, much like her floral fragrance, was often a mystery to Sesshoumaru. She was the margin of error in his life and why he was hesitant to correct that fault was often the topic of his quiet deliberations. Rin broke the silence.

 

“Do you ever wonder where the rain comes from? I mean sure, it comes from the clouds, but where do the clouds get the water? We've been up in the clouds many times and I never saw any water.”

 

Sesshoumaru gazed down at her and studied her profile. She was smiling with the same childish expression he had seen many times as they sat in a field, or his garden, or caves just like this. She always seemed to open up like a ledger ready to absorb more superfluous information. He raised his gold irises to the pattering raindrops again.

 

“My mother told me the clouds were like sponges. They travel to the sea and gather water then bring it back to empty it on the land.” He replied slowly.

 

Rin turned to look at him in surprise. She had never heard Sesshoumaru mention his mother before.

 

“What was your mother like? I can hardly remember my mother's face. When the bandits…” Rin's voice trailed off. “Oh you know that story. Never mind.” She chided herself for inadvertently bringing up the topic of the events that had orphaned her.

 

Sesshoumaru didn't seem to mind.

 

“My mother died when I was very young. She was inuyoukai like my father. It was predicted they would be a good match. But, there were complications.” He paused and seemed to reflect for a moment. “She was a good mother, but perhaps not the best mate for my father.”

 

“Did they separate?” Rin ventured. Her full attention was now trained curiously on the demon beside her.

 

“Youkai do not sever bonds.” He replied simply. “When they mate it is for life. My matron was killed by a snake demon. He dripped poison into her bath and she perished in a few days.”

 

Rin couldn't hide her shock and clapped a hand over her mouth.

 

“That's awful! Why on earth would he do that?” She cried.

 

“There are a great many ways nobles can earn enemies.” Sesshoumaru replied neutrally.

 

Rin supposed this was true, but that certainly didn't justify killing the mother of a young child, noble or no. It made Rin clench her fists at her sides to imagine anyone harming someone dear to Lord Sesshoumaru. He glanced down, bemused by her obvious well of emotion on his behalf, however unnecessary.

 

In truth, Sesshoumaru hadn't known his mother very well. She cared for him and saw that he lacked nothing in terms of training and material necessities befitting a prince, but she was not one to indulge in affection. Even as a child Sesshoumaru adapted a certain stillness of character. Those around him found the peculiar sternness to be unnatural at his age, and he was often left on his own. However reserved Sesshoumaru might have been, he rarely missed any of the subtle exchanges around him. He knew full well that his mother and father found no real joy in their bonding. His father had married the daughter of a neighboring province to secure an alliance; it was not a pairing of passion. It had left a dire impression on Sesshoumaru on nature of dealings with the opposite sex. His parents were no doubt the most powerful demons in all the lands, yet in each other they found no real recreation. After the production of a suitable heir, Lord Toga and his mate did not share their bed again. Sesshoumaru felt the rift between his parents, though it was not his place to question them.

 

It was the devious nature of the Cat Clan that led to his mother's early death. Long enemies of the Inutaisho lineage, they hired a clever snake assassin to infiltrate the castle under the guise of a diplomat. He poisoned the tea of the Inutaisho and the bathwater of his mate. While Sesshoumaru's mother succumbed to the poison, the snake had made the fatal mistake of underestimating the Inutaisho himself. The poison barely fazed the Lord, but he was enraged when the news of his mate's misfortune reached him. Though their bonding was a coupling of political gain, it was a huge insult to lose one's mate to treachery. He found the snake youkai and ripped his bowels from his still living body. Sesshoumaru was helpless to do anything as he watched his mother slowly wither to a corpse. She was a strong demon, but the snake had succeeded in giving her a lethal dose. Sesshoumaru watched as his mother's body gradually failed her. A completely unreadable expression passed over his face that would follow him into adulthood.

 

After his mate's death, Inutaisho led a destructive campaign against the Cat Clan, bent on vengeance. The very land shook with his great wrath. Inutaisho completely devastated the Cat Clan, killing all who would support them. The banner of the Cat fell and it was said the fires set from Inutaisho's bloody crusade could be seen all over the nation. Though his father had avenged his mother's death quite sufficiently, Sesshoumaru was left with a sense of emptiness. It was much for a young demon to comprehend, even a demon as sharp as Sesshoumaru. His father buried his mother with great honor and observed the appropriate term of mourning, but then quickly moved on. Several courtesans kept his father occupied during those years. Sesshoumaru knew this shouldn't bother him. Lords took mistresses all the time. But he couldn't help but think if he didn't hold on to the sadness of losing his mother she'd cease to exist at all. Who else would remember her passing? In the end, Sesshoumaru had no choice but to concede to his sire's decisions. Life resumed as it had before with the young prince, and he spent many years training under his father's guide.

 

Then Sesshoumaru's father did the only thing that he truly disagreed with. He took another mate. And not just that, a human woman as bride. Sesshoumaru was appalled and confused. True, his father had always instructed that humans, though lesser beings, were not to be abused. They cultivated the lands well and proved useful on occasion. But to take one as a mate? He might have been less surprised if it had been announced his father was going to mate a farm animal. Sesshoumaru couldn't believe it. For the first time in Sesshoumaru's life he was angry with his father. And to say he was angry was putting it lightly. He burst into his father's chambers unannounced and confronted him. Lord Toga struck him down effortlessly and glowered over him. Sesshoumaru seethed in hurt that had no where to go except translate into rage.

 

“Why father? How can you disgrace us like this?” Sesshoumaru snarled.

 

“You forget yourself boy.”

 

“She's a human!” He bit out through clenched teeth.

 

“I still hold your mother in great respect, and I always will. Her greatest gift to me was a son I could be proud of. Do not disappoint me now. Someday you will understand why I do this. Princess Izayoi is a fine woman, and you WILL treat her with deference.”

 

His noble father, unequalled in lands, power, and wealth, shaming the house he'd taught Sesshoumaru to protect. And for a pitiful human woman. Sesshoumaru growled in defiance. This contradiction made no sense and he would not yield. His father only shook his head and strode out of the room, leaving the young prince alone on the floor.

 

A short time later the Inutaisho and the princess were officially mated. Sesshoumaru sulked around the castle in low spirits often lashing out at anyone who happened to be close by. The servants scurried from any room he entered for fear of his foul disposition. Lord Toga spent less and less time at the castle of the western lands, preferring to spend his hours in the human lands with his mate. In a few short seasons the woman carried his child. With a morbid curiosity he yielded to his father's summons after the whelp was born to pay his respects to his new hanyou brother. Princess Izayoi was a slight looking woman with a soft voice, and Sesshoumaru regarded her with caution, as though she might cast a spell over him as well. But he was surprised when he saw his little brother for the first time. The infant chewed eagerly at the silk cloth he was wrapped in as if he couldn't wait the few short weeks that would take for his fangs to grow. The small bundle then seemed suddenly aware of Sesshoumaru standing nearby and fixed him with a wide eyed stare. The scrutiny made the young prince shift his weight, not quite sure how to react. The little pup had gold eyes and a puff of white hair at his forelock. He looked very much an Inutaisho. Slowly, Sesshoumaru raised his clawed index finger close to the pup's face. He expected a frightful weak creature would turn away howling while a strong whelp would grab at the offering and try to feed. Sesshoumaru was very taken aback when his little brother did neither. Instead he wrapped his fat little hands around the offered digit and began to suck peacefully, soon closing his gold eyes and drifting off to sleep. A smile tugged at the corners of Sesshoumaru's lips and he excused himself before anyone saw his amusement.

 

Later as he stood side by side with his father at the castle wall his father spoke the last words he would ever hear of him.

 

“Son, I know you do not approve of my mating with Izayoi, and I do not suspect that will ever change. But you have a brother now, and that comes with new responsibilities. I want you to promise me that no matter what, you'll look after your sibling as I anticipate you would have if he was full youkai. His human blood is not a weakness. Someday you'll see that he bridges the gap between humans and demons…a gap that will someday destroy us all if we don't mend it.”

 

“You cannot possibly be suggesting that humans could pose a threat to demon kind?”

 

“They are resilient creatures, son of mine. Demons have ruled the world for thousands of years, but even we had to overthrow the vile creatures before us. Humans grow in numbers and someday their power may rival our own. We demons must learn to find peace among their kind.”

 

“Father, if that's true why don't we just destroy them? They couldn't possibly stand up to our forces.”

 

To this Lord Toga only sighed and looked at his adolescent son as though he'd been wasting his words on a stone.

 

“I do not know where this hateful streak came from, Sesshoumaru. Perhaps I am at fault. I fear that if you do not change your ways it will destroy you. If you do not calm your hatred things will go badly for you. Inuyasha will alone carry on our line.”

 

Hurt struck Sesshoumaru like a sword blow and he watched his father depart into the castle. This simply couldn't be. His disdain wasn't a weakness; it was the product of abhorring weakness. How could his father be so sure of himself? Was he…right? Sesshoumaru was at war with his thoughts when he returned to the castle of the Western Lands. This would haunt Sesshoumaru for centuries to come.

 

Sesshoumaru arrived far too late to help his father when his enemies finally overtook the great Inutaisho, who died defending his mate and newborn son. The dragon Ryukotsusei and the vile Setsuna no Takemaru finally ushered the end of Lord Toga's long and powerful reign. He held off his adversaries while his mate and child escaped, but the wounds he endured were fatal. Sesshoumaru never saw the father he admired so much alive again. He never felt so miserable about being so right. This was the beginning of a new chapter in Sesshoumaru's life. Like the final collapse of a building already burning, Sesshoumaru emerged from himself a new creature, engulfed in his own hatred. A beast in him was born. He greeted the events of his terrible life with a new venomous lack of surprise.

 

Of course, the concerned girl beside him only knew fragments of his bloody history. Sesshoumaru's struggles ached like old wounds, but somehow being next to this girl who adored him so unwaveringly quieted the angry forces that gnawed at his mind. The slithery urge to destroy and express his rage of loss and betrayal seemed unimportant, as if sitting here watching the rain were of higher priority. Rin had endured many hardships in her young life as well, but somehow she had evaded the net of gloom that weighed Sesshoumaru down for so long. He suddenly found himself wondering how that could be.

 

“Do you hate the wolves?” He heard himself ask.

 

Rin grew very still.

 

“You mean the ones who…killed me?” She asked softly.

 

Sesshoumaru gave a slight nod. After a moment she started slowly, eyes still fixed on the view outside.

 

“For a long time I suppose I thought I did. But…the more I thought about it the more I came to realize how if I didn't suffer at their hands, my life wouldn't be as it is now. If bandits hadn't killed my family I wouldn't have become an orphan and might have lived my life out in the village as any other girl. It's unlikely I would have been fetching water for the teahouse and met my Lord in the forest. And had the wolves never attacked me, I never would have been revived by his blade.” She explained, her eyes glazed over in an almost dreamlike quality.

 

Sesshoumaru was watching her very closely.

 

“Kumiko-San says our lives are like the branches on a cherry tree.” She continued. “Some parts are covered in the knots of hardship, twisted from our struggles. But other parts are blooming with beautiful flowers and sweet fruit. They seem like polar opposites, but they are all part of the same tree.” Her eyes shifted slowly up to meet Sesshoumaru's intense gaze.

 

“I would be attacked by wolves a thousand times over if it meant I could stay at my Lord's side.” She said with a shy smile.

 

He looked so beautiful gazing down at her, like some impossibly perfect god. Leisurely Rin lifted a hand and placed it on his cheek. She even surprised herself at the sudden boldness but he did not resist her touch. His skin was warm under her fingertips. Sesshoumaru's lashes slowly drifted close. The soft caress felt as though he'd been traveling through a long desert and was finally offered a drink of water.

 

He covered Rin's small hand with his own and unconsciously he drew the young woman closer, and she came gladly. Her small form felt feather light as she filled his lap. Sesshoumaru brushed a feather of silky hair from her porcelain cheek and he could not recall a more beautiful sight than the smile she offered him. Rin's hand moved from his cheek to his lips, barely grazing the underlying fangs. Slowly he bent his head to her and kissed her flushed lips. He could hear her heart fluttering with chaste nervousness. He moved a clawed hand through her still damp hair reveling in its silky texture. He moved from her lips and slowly traced her jaw, barely brushing her skin with his lips. He followed the gentle curve of her neck to her collarbone and inhaled deeply, taking in her clean scent. Her robe was falling open at the neck and he gazed at the smooth flesh. Rin raised a timid hand to his haori and brushed her fingertips against the light fabric. He nuzzled gently at her exposed flesh.

 

Sesshoumaru did not miss the heady scent of Rin's arousal. Slowly it began to overwhelm his senses, urging him to sink his teeth into her smooth skin. To make her his. To claim her fully. Her probing fingertips grazed his chin and moved up to his hair, brushing her thumb against his sensitive ears. A throaty growl rumbled up from his chest, and he was growing weaker against the call of her stimulating aroma. Sesshoumaru felt the pulsing need of his sex stiffening against her, eager to be quenched. To conquer. He could easily flip her over and drive his need into her and make her shout his name. Flecks of red were appearing in his golden eyes and he clenched his teeth, fighting for control. His hands kneaded the flesh at the small of her back and she made a small crooning sound, like that of a songbird. He curled his lips back, revealing his curving white incisors and pressed them against her skin. Rin tilted her head back exposing her neck fully to him, as if ready for his unspoken need. He need only bite down…

 

A sudden jolt of panic struck him and he shoved her from his embrace, sending Rin roughly to the cave floor. She looked stunned, then all at once scared and confused. He stood abruptly flashing a menacing snarl as he fought for control. The twin stripes at his cheeks were jagged with feral want. This would not be.

 

“Lord Sesshoumaru?” Her shaky voice reached him.

 

He only snarled in reply, waking Jakken and Ah-Un. She raised herself uneasily to a sitting position and felt suddenly ashamed at her brazen behavior. He thrust his hands into his sleeves and clenched his eyes shut, forcing his desires back. Gradually Sesshoumaru regained his iron clan control over his will, forcing the overpowering youkai desire in check. The jagged marks at his cheeks smoothed themselves and he was command of himself once more.

 

Finally he turned to face Rin, but she was no where to be seen.