InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Setting Them Straight ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

WhoOoOo! Chapter 5! Let's all party!

In case anyone was confused… Kagome did ask to leave the next day, but then Kitty intervened: "It's okay," Kitty said. Then she gave a jaw-cracking yawn and continued in a tired voice, "I'd like to see how it is, if it's okay with you all." That kind of had them decide to go that day… though I admit, I could have been clearer with that. Sorry.

ANYWAY!!!!!

Hope you all liked the last chappie anyway. In fact, I hope you like this whole thing so far. That includes this chappie… and those to come. LOVE THEM! I COMMAND YOU!

~*~

"Does it have `Like a Virgin' on there?" Shio asked about the keyboard, because that's one of his favorite songs.

"Um… no, but it has `Like a Surgeon'," Kitty replied after thinking for a bit.

Shio looked crestfallen. "But it's not the same!" He then pouted for a bit.

"I can play the tune if you want…" Kitty offered, trying to settle the keyboard in one arm and use the other hand to play the song.

"Aw, what a doll you are! You'd do that for your beloved Shio?" ^_^

"Er… well I'll try." She was having difficulties with using just the one hand.

"Having trouble?" He watched as Kitty nodded while trying fruitlessly to figure out a way to get both hands free. Then Shio got an idea…

~*~

"Inuyasha?"

"What?"

"Osuwari."

Slam.

"QUIT DOING THAT!!!"

Kagome looked down at him with a flat expression. "It's not like you don't deserve it for leaving Kitty to face Shio."

Inuyasha muttered some curses into the ground before the beads let him get up, and he dusted the dirt off of his clothes as he spoke. "But you've been doing that every five minutes since we left Kaede's, and that was an hour ago! That's 12 sits, Kagome! TWELVE!!!"

Shippo, who had been with Sango for his own safety, ran up onto Kagome's shoulder to help her with the argument.

"Kagome's right, Inuyasha! Kitty brought all of that ramen here for you and all you do to thank her is leave her to Shio!"

"Shut up, brat! This doesn't concern you!" Inuyasha yelled as he brought his fist down onto the little kitsune's head.

"I~N~U~Y~A~S~H~A!!!"

Behind them, Sango, Miroku and Kirara all shook their heads. Every time…

"Lady Sango, there is still time to make a different, more likely choice," Miroku said as he pulled out a calendar that he found in Kagome's backpack and flipped through it. "Until all of the villagers who are in on this hand over their money, the bets aren't officially set."

Meanwhile, you could still hear Shippo sobbing while Inuyasha and Kagome argued some more.

("How many times do I have to SIT -slam- you to make you leave poor Shippo alone!?")

Sango looked at him determinedly. "No, I'm sticking with December. I have a feeling it will happen during the winter."

("The stupid brat was poking his nose into stuff that isn't even any of his business!")

"What do you mean by that? What's so great about winter?"

("Well I'm glad he did! At least now there's another person in the conversation with an actual BRAIN!")

"Well it's just more romantic. There's the snow, and all… it's just better."

("But Kagome, for him to be `another person with a brain', there would have had to already been one in the first place!")

Miroku got one of his perverted looks. "Why, Lady Sango, I'm so happy that I know now! Perhaps when it gets to that time, you could show me some reasons that it's `better'?"

("You DO realize that even though you just insulted me, you also agreed with me and insulted yourself at the same time, right?")

Sango looked at him flatly. " `Better' doesn't necessarily mean `more opportune for lecherous monks to grope women with impunity', so stop getting ideas."

("…Huh," Inuyasha said in realization.)

"Who said I was getting ideas? And I am a monk, so if I did get ideas, they certainly wouldn't be anything that would offend you."

("Mhmm," Kagome hummed. They seem to have somehow resolved their issue.)

"Oh, right, and I suppose that all those time that you- PERVERT!!!" Sango immediately turned to slap Miroku square on the face when she felt a hand `accidentally brush against' her backside.

(Kagome, Inuyasha and Shippo took the opportunity of the end to their argument to listen to the beginning of one between Sango and Miroku. Well… more like a session of Sango yelling at a perfectly calm Miroku, who never got angry or to a point where he would raise his voice or speak sharply to anyone. But hey, it was entertaining all the same. Kirara joined the three to avoid getting in either of Sango or Miroku's way while they weren't paying attention to where they were walking.)

"You know, I'm actually impressed. You're the only person I've ever met who could end a conversation with groping a person, when the topic had nothing to do with either of us in the first place! Tell me, do you even remember what we were talking about, or were you just pretending to take part in the verbal communication while you plotted a way to twist my words and get me distracted so that I might not notice when you copped a feel?"

Miroku feigned a look of offence. "Of course I remember what we were discussing! We were making a list of all the things we could to together during the winter."

Sango ignored the way he edited that just to try to get at her. She was starting to think that maybe her slapping him turned him on, and she was having qualms over doing that too many times, lest she get him even more riled up. So instead of screaming at him or resorting to violence, she just fumed silently before she responded. "But do you recall how it started?"

"Yes."

"Then give me proof."

"Kagome and Inuyasha had begun to argue, and so I brought up our bet and asked it you would like to change your bet to a month other than December for when you think they will finally admit their love to each other- because, as I said, you will only lose money if you bet on a time that is not distant enough. It would be wise to follow the other villagers' examples and choose a time around May of two years from now."

A few feet in front of them, Kagome and Inuyasha stopped in their tracks. The entire village was betting on when they'd… oh, neither of them could even finish the though. That monk would pay.

They both turned around as the screen switched to a view of the sky and various sounds of painful contact were heard. Then it reverted back to the group as Kagome and Inuyasha stormed off in the same direction they had been previously walking down the path, Shippo patting Kagome's head comfortingly from her shoulder. Sango was standing next to a crumpled Miroku, looking down at him with satisfied amusement, Kirara once again nearby her owner.

"See that? See how well they work together? It will definitely happen, but judging from their reaction to that, not any time soon," Miroku assessed with a high-pitched voice, courtesy of the pain he was feeling. However, he still remained calm as he stood up and proceeded to continue down the path after the other three who had gone ahead.

There was a long silence as they all went on their way, getting closer to their destination.

"Kagome, I'm hungry," Shippo whined. "Can we stop for lunch?"

Inuyasha opened his mouth to protest, but before any noise could come out of it, Kagome glared at him, just DARING him to start up another argument. Inuyasha swore he could see flames behind her.

So they stopped for lunch.

But just as Kagome was lighting the fire to heat the water for the ramen (what else did you expect them to eat?), she noticed everyone staring at something in the distance behind her.

She turned around to see what was so enthralling, and what she saw made her wonder if that argument with Inuyasha over Kitty's well-being in Shio's presence could have been avoided.

Her back had been facing the stretch of path that they had already walked, and so when she looked behind her, Kitty and Shio were approaching them.

…But they weren't just approaching them. They were also singing along to `Like a Virgin', which Kitty was playing the tune for on her keyboard. How was she able to do that? Well, she was sitting on Shio's shoulders, and the keyboard was resting on his head so that she could easily use both hands.

Kitty was obviously just having a grand ol' time with her new buddy, since she seemed not to have any qualms over doing some weird dance that looked even more strange because she was sitting… but Kitty's wiggling plus the fact that Shio had his head between Kitty's legs seemed to be WAY too pleasurable to him for either of the two's own good.

However, Kitty was perfectly oblivious to that.

"Um…" Kagome said in her stupor. It just wasn't a very common sight to behold.

Kitty must have heard her because she skipped a few lines to end the song. Once they both finished singing out the last line, Kitty waved to the group and called out, "Hey guys! What's up?"

"Uh…" was their intelligent answer.

Shio and Kitty reached the group and Kitty did a leap-frog maneuver to get off of Shio's shoulders. She ended up taking the keyboard with her and landing in front of Shio, where she sat herself down and observed what the others had stopped for. After coming to the conclusion that they were about to eat lunch, Miroku's expression caught her eye… he was looking from her to Shio, and he looked extremely jealous of something. She just shrugged it off.

Shio sat next to Kitty and glanced into Kagome's open yellow backpack at the load of ramen, which seemed twice the size that she usually had in there.

"Where the hell did all that ramen come from?" he asked, helping himself to one of the cups. Inuyasha glared at him for daring to do such a thing, but he probably would have clobbered him also had they not been best friends.

Kitty filled him in on where it came from.

"So, uh, did you get here okay?" Kagome asked.

" `Course we did! I met Shio at the well and then we were on our way!" Kitty said. Then she glomped onto Shio. "He's so much fun!"

Shio looked very smug and said, "Why yes, yes I am."

After that, Kagome and the few other people who had been worried about Kitty relaxed. They ate their lunch and continued on their way towards the demon that was rumored to have the shard.

~*~

Finally, they found the village. They asked around, and most of the people told them that the demon was usually in town, and it always disguised itself differently and never stayed in the same place. Most of the people they asked also told them that the demon would work someplace, and then it would feed off of the last person to be wherever it was late at night.

One villager said that lately, he heard that the demon was in the geisha house.

So they went there to stay until nightfall.

~*~

They waited and waited, but the demon never showed itself. It was getting close to morning when they all figured that maybe it was a weak demon, even with a shikon shard, and so it would only attack if there was only one person left. So they left Inuyasha in there and the rest of them went outside, because Inuyasha would be able to handle it if the demon jumped him.

Soon enough, once Inuyasha was by himself, out came the demon. It was a chameleon demon, so that must have been how it managed to disguise itself so easily. It was incredibly fast as well.

~*~

Inuyasha led the demon outside so that the building wouldn't get damaged. They battled with it, and it proved to be very difficult because of its speed and camouflage. Sango's Hiraikotsu missed most of the time, and when it did hit, it didn't even do enough damage to make it count. Inuyasha tried to use kaze no kizu on it, but its scales were some of the toughest pieces of armor they'd seen.

So it turned out that the demon wasn't weak, just tactful.

And it did have a shikon shard, thankfully. Kagome spotted it stuck in the roof of the demon's mouth. But while she was distracted, the demon's tail came around behind her and was about to knock her over… and everyone who saw it couldn't do anything about it. Kagome was by herself behind the demon except for Shio, Shippo and Kitty, and their eyes weren't behind them.

But just when it was about to make contact, Kitty heard the sound of it whipping through the air and thought faster than she had in her life. She went into her full demon form, picked up the other three who were with her and high-tailed it out of there just in time.

Her demon form was a little bigger than Kirara. She was completely black, and one would call her a panther, except for the fact that her fur was a bit longer and her face had more of the shape of a tiger. So basically, she looked like a black tiger.

So for the rest of the battle, Shio, Kagome and Shippo got a ride on Kitty. Kagome told Inuyasha to get the demon to open its mouth, and she shot a purifying arrow into it, hitting her target. It fell with a ground-breaking rumble, and she quickly found the shard to purify it before the demon could regenerate itself.

They stayed the rest of the night at the house of an extremely thankful villager, and then left in the morning.

~*~

"Here in the forest, we see trees, grass, and other various plants. Coming to a clearing, if you would look to the right, we see a path with a group of travelers. It appears as though they are returning home from a great triumph. Ah, look there! That must be their spoils from the hunt. Good job, ol' blokes," Kitty na like an Australian tour guide as she prowled through some trees on the edge of the path. Kagome and Shio were the only ones who found any amusement in it though, since nobody else knew what she was imitating, or that she was imitating anything, for that matter.

Kitty looked at the group, and saw that they were all pretty cheerful.

Except for Inuyasha. He was just walking along with his scowl in place and his arms crossed in the sleeves of his haori.

Kitty changed into her full demon form and kept walking so that nobody would see her mope over not being able to get even a smile out of Inuyasha. But Sango, who knew what a sulking cat looked like, and attempted to cheer her up.

"Don't worry Kitty, Inuyasha's always grumpy after he saves a village in the process of getting a shikon shard," she said. That earned a chuckle if agreement from the rest of the group, and Kitty stopped sulking, but stayed in her demon form.

Shippo was in front of her and to the left, and he was fun, so she picked him as her next target. She wove around everyone so what she was directly behind him, and then she stalked up behind the little fox in a complete silence that only a cat can achieve. She held her breath and when her face was right behind him, she pushed into his back and snorted out a puff of air. He screeched in surprise and scampered up onto Kagome's shoulder, where he took the time to see that it was only Kitty, and he laughed.

He was just so cute!!! ^_^ Kitty felt much better after that.

That little prank she just pulled reminded her of something that she could remember her uncles playing with her and all of the other kids in the family… they would tag each other at random times and say `got ya last'. It was an on-going thing that they would do every time they went to family things. It wasn't anything like tag, where you would chase the victim- you just got them when the opportunity came up.

She slowed her pace so that she was walking next to Miroku, who she hadn't singled out yet in any way shape or form. Then she changed herself into a human again, and asked, "Wanna play a game?"

He thought about it and said, "Sure."

She poked him in the arm. "Got ya last."

He just blinked at her. "Did I win?"

"Nope. I won that round. The game never ends; you just get in the lead by getting someone last, and not letting someone get you. Get it?"

He nodded. "Yup" Then he attempted to get her last, but she was too quick. She had already moved ahead next to Shio, who was listening to the mp3 player on Kitty's electric keyboard.

"Sorry Miroku, but nobody's ever got me last, and nobody ever will. I'm just too quick!" she said smugly.

Suddenly, the next tune that was playing on the keyboard caught Kitty's attention.

Kagome also recognized the bass drums and brass instruments that were playing at the beginning of it. "Where have I heard this song before?" she asked.

"The Disney movie, Aladdin! You know, when Prince Ali was coming into the city riding on Abu? That was my favorite part ^_^" Kitty explained.

"Oh yeah! That was so great. I loved that."

Kitty started to sing along with it, since she learned the lyrics by osmosis or something while Souta was watching the movie during her nap the other day. She changed the lyrics though… just to make them more suitable.

"Make way

for Sir Puppy!

Say hey

It's Sir Puppy!"

Kagome laughed at the change and started listening better to what else Kitty would make different.

"Hey, clear the way

in the old bazaar

Hey, you! Let us through

It's a bright new star

Oh come be the first on your block to meet his eye!

Make way, here he comes!

Ring bells, bang the drums!

Are you gonna love this guy!"

She glomped onto Inuyasha.

"Sir Puppy, fabulous he, Inuyasha!

Genuflect, show some respect!

Down on one knee!

Now quit trembling in your fear,

`Cause your new hero is here

So come and meet his spectacular coterie!

Inuyasha was confused. He didn't know whether to glare at Kitty, or to look arrogant because she was praising him. He opted to keep his face blank for the time being.

"Sir Puppy, mighty is he, Inuyasha!

Strong as ten regular men, definitely!"

He made his decision. He'd glare at her. "Hey, I'm even stronger than that, and you know it!"

"He faced a moth and his horde!

One hundred bad guys with swords!

Who goons and their lord?

Why, Sir Puppy!"

Kagome decided to join in, since she knew some of the words as well, and Kitty just looked like she was having a blast with it.

Kitty couldn't think of anything to change some of the next lyrics to off the top of her head, so she just let the keyboard go on with it.

Keyboard: He's got seventy-five golden camels!

Kitty: "Isn't he gorgeous, Kag?"

Keyboard: Purple peacocks, he's got fifty-three!

Kagome: "Fabulous Kitty, I love the dog ears."

Kitty: "When it comes to exotic-type mammals…" ::gestures towards Shio, Shippo, herself and Inuyasha::

Shippo: ::wanting to be part of the fun:: "Has he got a zoo?"

Kity: "I'm telling you, it's a world-class menagerie!"

The next part, Kitty and Kagome sung in synchronization, with Kagome in the background, who had also glomped onto the poor victim of the song. The rest of the gang was still watching with amusement.

Kitty: "Sir Puppy, handsome is he, Inuyasha!

That physique, how can I speak? Weak at the knees!

(Kagome: "There's no question this puppy's alluring

Never ordinary, never boring.

Everything about the man just plain impresses!)

Kitty: "Now get on out in that square

Adjust your hair and prepare

To gawk and grovel and stare at Sir Puppy!"

(Kagome: "He's a winner; he's a whiz, and wonder!

He's about to pull my heart asunder!

And I absolutely LOVE the way he dresses!" ::swoons::)

Inuyasha had forgiven Kitty. Now he was just blushing and concentrating on what Kagome just sang out. Did she mean that? He did look good in red, after all…

Kitty: "He has battled a white, evil monkey,

And to kill it would give him much glee!

He's got pals, he's got comrades and buddies!

They bow to his whim, love serving him!

They're just lousy with loyalty…

To Puppy…!

Sir Puppy…!

Sir Puppy! Amorous he, Inuyasha!

Heard your priestess was a sight, lovely to see!

And that, good people, is why

He got dolled up and dropped by

With tons of ramen,

Perverts galore,

With his demon huntress,

A kitsune and more,

With his purvey priest

and his sword (the beast!)

and cat that warbles on key!

Make way for Sir Puppy!!!!!"

Kitty finally got the smile out of Inuyasha that she had been wanting. He probably didn't need it, and Kitty would probably regret singing that later, but he looked like his ego had just been inflated to three-times its original size.

But why wouldn't it have been? They just dedicated a song to him. And they changed the lyrics of it to fit him to boot! Finally, the recognition he deserves! And he was starting to like that electric keyboard.

Finally, Kaede's hut was coming into view.

~*~

Wooooooo-y! That was a long sucker. Did you like it? Huh? Did you? HUH?! Tell me in a review! And flames are accepted, too… though I don't know why you would ever want to flame me… I mean, I'm just so wonderful and talented, and I KNOW that you got at least one good laugh out of this. Be honest. You did. I rule.

…

You're right, that was Inuyasha who got the ego boost… sorry `bout that. *becomes humble* Gimmie some good reviews? Please?