InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Shrine Prostitute ❯ Circumvention ( Chapter 7 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Shrine Prostitute by FlameTwirler

~ ~ ~

Chapter 7: Circumvention
----- To avoid or get around by artful maneuvering
----- To go around; bypass

~ ~ ~

The next few days passed by in a daze for Kagome.

She finally understood what Inuyasha had meant by disillusionment as the trappings of the Shrine bore down on her at last. With the men she saw the next nights it was 1: In, 2: Fuck, 3: Out.

Kagome hated the term but there was no other word for it. It wasn’t sex, it certainly wasn’t making love, it was just…that. There was nothing gentle, elegant, or personal about it, it was just a well-oiled machine running like the business it was.

Business, nothing more.

She almost hated Inuyasha for making it more than that, for talking with her, for treating her like a person instead of a client, but even when she got angry she knew that he’d actually been protecting her, shielding her from an environment that treated sex as a detached form of a worship and not an emotionally involved experience.

Virgins should never come to a place like this, she thought. It would be way too easy to be turned off to the idea of sex forever or to pervert it in their minds to something purely physical with no further implications – maybe even become the kinds of people who justified abusing Inuyasha on a regular basis to themselves.

She wondered how those people got to that spot where they enjoyed seeing others in pain. Had they always been like that? Was it bad childhood? Was it just bad experiences with sex? How long did they come to the Shrine before moving on to that kind of session?

Too many questions, to which she knew she’d never have the answers.

And now, as much as it also disheartened her, she was glad that Inuyasha had been her first, that he’d been so kind to her, that he’d argued with her and joked with her – well as much as he could with his sense of humor. He’d made her first experience something other than a business transaction that felt cold, regardless of the fact it was for a deity and all to protect her family. If she’d been thrown to these other Tetsudai first off she wondered if she’d ever truly want to get seriously involved with anyone romantically at all if all she would have thought she could look forward to was an empty act.

All her romantic notions of love and happily ever after would have died on the spot if it hadn’t been for him.

Closing her mouth on a muted scream Kagome hit the pillow next to her on the bed. She had to stop thinking about him. If she didn’t stop she knew she’d go crazy or at least delirious from the lack of sleep.

She groaned at her latest failure to catch some zzs and climbed out of bed to sit at the small table where her books were set up. Despite the fact that she hadn’t seen the hanyou in days she was still adamant about finding out everything she could about his position in demon and human society, or about any loophole where she could find a way to give him his freedom.

Sunlight poured in through the cracks in the blinds and Kagome traced the patterns across the words on the page she was reading. She’d been studying for some time now and still could only find the barest references to hanyou at all and even then it was only in the same sense as an animal, always as a possession or something else barely even worth mentioning it had so little value.

How could a modern society still think that way?

Stifling a yawn she sent a wistful look at her bed but she knew it was useless. As soon as she lay down her mind would fill with silver hair and fleeting smirks. She knew it was pointless to try to sleep so she figured she may as well try to do something productive with her time and went back to reading.

~ ~ ~

Kagome made her way up to Ryu’s desk that night still trying to wipe the crease marks off her face from where she’d fallen asleep on her stack of books.

She cracked a sleepy smile at him, feeling both sheepish and annoyed about her coming request. “Do you think you could pick someone for me tonight, Ryu? I’m sick of rifling through that massive book and the last three I’ve picked haven’t exactly been winners anyhow…”

Looking up she saw him gazing at her thoughtfully, rubbing his chin. “Well, this certainly is abnormal procedure for here, but why not. As it happens a few days ago a certain Tetsudai actually requested that I suggest him to you after it appeared you would be sticking on the human end of the spectrum.”

“He – he’s demon?” That caught her by surprise.

“What?” Ryu asked, raising an eyebrow at her. “You got a problem with that, Miss ‘I’m-On-A-Crusade-Against-Prejudice’?” he ribbed lightly.

“No! Not at all!” She waved her hands wildly in front of her as if to brush aside the very thought. “It’s just that I’ve never interacted closely with a demon before so the idea is a bit unnerving. Besides, I thought most demons looked down on humans and didn’t associate much with them, let alone sleep with them.”

“And just where do you think hanyou come from?”

She had to fight a blush from creeping up her face. Criminy, she was not hearing this from Ryu of all people.

“Everyone’s a little different, Kagome, you should know that.” His look didn’t carry any condescension, just patience, and that made her breathe easier. “Besides I know him pretty well. Kouga’s a bit on the arrogant side but overall he’s a nice guy. If you’ll take this old man’s opinion I think the two of you will get along quite nicely – much better than the last three.”

Kagome had to smile at this, a slight sense of relief flooding her at the idea that tonight might not be as cold as she was becoming used to. “I guess I’ll just have to rely on you then, Ryu-san. But you’re not allowed to take the title of ‘old man’ until you’re grey all the way around…or at least completely bald.”

She winked at him and he spluttered in mock indignation.

“So what time can you fit me in with this Kouga?”

“How about right now?”

“What? He’s actually free for next session? Now what are the odds of that?” she pondered quietly.

Almost nonexistent, Ryu answered quietly. The truth was the ookami youkai had been pestering Ryu about ‘that cute ningen girl’ since her second week there. Kouga had been flabbergasted to learn she’d stuck with ‘mutt-boy’ for so long but knew their time would be coming to an end soon and so hoped then that he’d finally have his shot.

Kouga had actually put in his request with Ryu almost immediately after Kagome had caught his attention and it had been in the back burner of Ryu’s mind for the better part of two weeks. Still he’d been determined not to bring it up unless Kagome asked first, regardless of Kouga’s demands. He knew Kagome was a sweet girl and would go with almost anyone he suggested and he didn’t want to take advantage of that and send her to someone she might be uncomfortable with. Now that she’d broached the subject though he was glad as could be that he’d finally have the wolf off his back, as his requests had gotten more and more adamant each day.

As he’d said though, Kouga wasn’t bad, otherwise he’d never bring it up to the girl regardless; the wolf could be a bit pushy, that was all, and Ryu had more than enough stress in his life already without the ookami harassing him every day. He was just careful in how much he told Kagome as Kouga had been very specific of what he could and could not divulge.

Really, he thought, rolling his eyes as he gave Kagome the paper with the instructions on where Kouga’s room was located, the poor youkai just doesn’t want to let her know too early how excited he was to be with her.

With that, he bowed back over his books and wondered if he’d have to wait until the next night to see how things turned out.

~ ~ ~

Kagome sighed at her own hesitation outside the Tetsudai’s door. Yeesh, you’d think it’d get easier after a couple weeks, she groused.

Her finger sat on the buzzer, and she'd only begun to press it when the door was flung open and she was pulled into a pair of strong arms as the living stuffing in her was almost squished out by the force of the enormous bear hug.

She hadn’t even been able to see him before her face was crushed to his chest but Kagome couldn’t help but giggle at this flamboyant greeting. As quickly as it began the hug was cut off and she was held out at arms length in front of one of the cutest men – correction, youkai – she’d ever seen, and she wasn’t able to resist her first genuine grin in three days.

The Tetsudai in front of her was simply exuding energy, as if he were barely holding it in and it was a marvelous feat he was standing in one place at all. The only still parts on his body were his eyes, which were glued fastidiously to her face and she blushed under the intensity. Still, the overall feeling he gave was one of an exuberant little boy who’d just found his newest plaything.

Kagome wasn’t quite sure she liked the analogy she’d just come up with, but it was still one step up the totem pole from the “slab-o-meat” status she’d had the past couple nights.

“I take it you must be Kouga,” she said lamely to break the silence, extending her hand in front of her. The youkai took it and shook with enough force she was worried about one of her joints popping out.

“That I am, that I am,” he replied, turning to pull her toward the bed, ignoring the slight hesitation in her step. “I’m glad you decided to come,” he continued, sitting down and patting the bed next to him, the spot he indicated being far enough away from him to not require any touching should she not wish it. “I’ve been wanting to get to know you.”

That stopped her cold. His slip, wherein he’d unintentionally admitted to having watched her for more than just that night, went unnoticed by Kagome. She was too busy reveling in her sudden status boost.

“Get to know me?” she asked, wanting to make sure he wasn’t simply using a euphemism to allude to knowledge of a more personal nature.

“Yes, of course. Where were you born? Where did you go to school? Do you still go to school now? What do you want to do? What about your family? Are you in a relationship? What are your hobbies? Do you like your meat rare or medium well?”

She stared, blinking, at his earnest expression, before she crumbled into laughter. Her nervous energy from earlier was bubbling to leave her and his final question pushed her over the edge.

She had to cut herself off quickly though as she noticed his crestfallen look. Patting him genially on the shoulder she held her other arm to her stomach and grinned in his face. “Don’t worry,” she said. “Laughing right now is a good thing for me.” She was gratified to see the smile return to light up his face.

They launched into their life stories and it was amazing how much talking the two were able to accomplish in so little time. Kagome told Kouga all about her home and her family, the Higurashi Shrine, and school. She tried to keep herself as short as possible though because now that she wasn’t so worried she found she was burning with curiosity about him, his demon heritage, and his relationship to the Bacana Shrine.

“So how did you end up here?” she asked abruptly.

Kouga blinked at the quick change in subject but was more than pleased that she was interested in him and not just his talents as a Tetsudai.

“Well a person ends up a lot of places when he’s 153 years old.” He crossed his arms over his chest, closed his eyes, turned his head away, and stuck his nose up in the air in mock disdain of her question. Of course he couldn’t help but peek under his eyelashes to see her reaction and was pleased to see he caught her off guard but she wasn’t disgusted as he’d worried. When she started laughing, however, he grumbled to himself, thinking he’d been worried about the wrong reaction.

“But you’re so…so old!” Kagome gasped out between fits of giggles. “I couldn’t possibly sleep with someone who could be my great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great…GREAT grandfather! I mean, sure it’s legal, but doesn’t it still reek of pedophilia?”

At the appalled look on his face she couldn’t hold it in anymore and collapsed onto the bed holding her stomach, tears running down her face as she tried desperately to catch her breath.

Kouga just snarled at her impishly and Kagome was sure it had been that final ‘great’ that had pushed him over the edge. Then without warning he pounced on her, pinning her to the bed, which was a simple feat since she was still weak from laughter and he was…well…youkai.

She stiffened, half with real tension and nervousness, half to continue their playacting.

He gently squeezed the wrists that were wrapped in his hands to remind her of her position and grinned cheekily down at her. “I’m still young enough to satisfy anything you could ever want.”

Lips still curled he slowly rose off her, as if he’d been meaning to move more quickly but was reluctant to leave her, then offered her a hand up. She was flustered and was sure her face wasn’t quite its normal hue but she tried to cover it by talking again.

“So if you’re not going to tell me why you specifically are here, then maybe you’ll tell me why so many other demons come to work at the Shrine? I’m sure it can’t be they’re all nymphomaniacs…”

Kouga was astonished. He thought he’d avoided the question directed at him earlier with enough charisma and subtlety that she wouldn’t pick up on it. She showed him though. This was just yet another reason he was confident in his choice and was sure she’d be suitable.

“Skip the idea of youkai working here for obligation or debt and run straight to sex addiction, eh? Something weighing heavily on your mind?” He raised an eyebrow at her and she picked up the pillow behind her and hit him on the shoulder.

“I happen to be here because of the power of the prayers offered here, not because I’m a nymphomaniac, thank you very much,” she said snootily, sticking her nose in the air much in the same manner Kouga had earlier.

Said youkai wisely kept his mouth shut about his position on how very much he might like it if she was.

When he didn’t contradict her Kagome got down off her high horse and continued her thought. “I don’t see youkai needing to work here as some humans apparently do. They’re paying off debt by working it off but youkai have so many other job options, especially with their strength. The jobs might not be the most glamorous, but still I don’t see any overseer turning down a youkai for a construction job when most could easily do the work of 5 men.

“No,” she shook her head. “It doesn’t make sense for them to be here for that reason. The humans either commit their lives to this job as a service or are at the end of their options.”

She tapped her index finger against her chin in contemplation. “I couldn’t see a youkai doing either; I don’t see them having no other options and, as we’ve already discussed, their lives are sooooo much longer,” she drawled out the word intentionally to make him squirm, sighing and rolling her eyes when it didn’t work and he just smirked at her.

“They’re not likely to commit their entire lives to something like this, working here with no family. Seems like it’d be a few year commitment at most for them.”

Kouga coughed. The girl was uncommonly bright and hitting too close to the mark for his comfort. Of course he’d tell her eventually, and he hoped sooner rather than later, but there was no way he could let her know right now that many youkai came to work at the Shrine with the ultimate goal of finding a new spouse, typically after the first had died too early.

“You’re right in that the two year training to become a Tetsudai is like a drop in the bucket to most youkai so it’s not a lifelong commitment for us. Some of us sign contracts for set periods of time that can be extended, some are here on a contingent basis and can quit whenever we like.”

“Which kind are you?”

He leaned over her and leered. “The kind that wants to finish all this chit chat and get on to the main course.”

His smile turned jovial as he moved closer, boxing her in on the bed, all but crawling onto her lap, though there was still no physical contact made “We don’t have time tonight to be as thorough as I’d like – for the sake of the depth of your prayers, of course.” He winked at her.

“I guess I can just hope you allow me to remedy that tomorrow night.” He didn’t allow her to speak, instead placing a finger gently on her mouth to cut off any reply she might have made as he moved to kiss her neck.

Before she knew it they were both nude and she was lying under him, her awkwardness and nervousness back tenfold. Maybe it was just the first night jitters? Maybe she should try him again the next night and it could be better. He was pretty nice after all.

She tried to make herself relax and loosen up a little. It wouldn’t do either of them any good if she was tense and rigid through their session. She thought back over their conversation, chuckling to herself again over his reaction to his age and wondering if 153 years old was young, middle aged, or old for a youkai?

Letting herself get caught up in her thoughts she followed the rabbit trails through her mind as she felt the tension draining from her limbs.

Did age expectancy vary depending on the race of youkai? Would a hanyou live as long? For that matter, just how old was Inuyasha? How long had he been subjected to such a degrading and painful lifestyle just because of his blood?

Laying back she closed her eyes on a sigh only for them to fly open again as she gasped, a phantom image of silver still playing behind her eyelids.

She tried to collect herself but couldn’t quite stop the shaking. She’d never felt so dirty in her life. The blasted hanyou not only haunted her thoughts enough to prevent her from sleeping but now she’d fallen so low as to think of him while with another male.

She was close to drowning under the sudden tsunami of guilt and disgust at her own actions but instead of allowing herself to fill with self-pity she felt resolution swell within her. She would forget Inuyasha and only think of him in relation to politics and hanyou position within society. Never could she lay aside his situation and the fact that someone needed to take up a cause for his rights – and if no one else would do it then she would claim the role.

But other than that she would have to push him completely out of her mind, for both their sakes. He would be a casual friend and political cause to her, but no more.

Slowly she raised her arms and wrapped them around Kouga, stroking her fingers up and down his curved spine. She took it from the groan he shuddered against her neck that he liked what she was doing.

Yes, she would forget all about Inuyasha as an individual.

~ ~ ~

As it was, Ryu didn’t have to wait until nightfall to see how things had gone. Kouga found him the following morning as the Shrine was shutting down, patting him soundly on the back and grinning like an idiot.

“I take it things went well?” Ryu asked dryly.

“Of course!” Kouga enthused. “Why wouldn’t they? So well, in fact, that my little woman is coming back tonight!”

“You know this for sure?” He chose to ignore his regarding Kagome as ‘his little woman’.

“She said so herself.”

Ryu couldn’t quite keep down the grin at Kouga’s antics. He half expected to see him start pounding his chest in glee. “So what time do you want me to make the appointment for?”

Kouga looked slightly crestfallen for all of two seconds. “I didn’t bother to ask her what time, thought she might do it on her way out.” Then he perked up. “I know! Just cancel all other appointments for me and keep the night open. That way there’s be no way I’ll be unavailable when she comes.” Sometimes I’m just too brilliant, he preened.

“You sure about that Kouga?” Ryu was stunned. He’d known the youkai had a thing for Kagome but he’d had no clue it was this serious yet.

The feeling was only amplified when Kouga nodded in affirmation.

“Just make sure you take it easy with her, okay? She doesn’t know how everything runs around here yet, especially not when it concerns demons.” Said demons had a completely different set of rules in the Shrine, many more liberties and often quite different reasons for coming to work in the Shrine to begin with.

For the sake of her own sanity Ryu hoped Kagome caught on quickly.

~ ~ ~

The night went pretty smoothly for Kagome. She’d arrived and been momentarily confused by the openness of Kouga’s schedule, but as Ryu was reluctant to divulge anything about it she shrugged it off and headed down the hall, one much nicer than the one Inuyasha lived in.

Kouga himself had been a surprise as she’d expected any demon to be gruffer and colder than anyone she’d met so far. She now knew she’d unfortunately delved into a stereotype on that one, as the human men she’d encountered between Inuyasha and Kouga were by far the coldest of the lot.

In fact Kouga was one of the kindest people she’d ever met, in his way of course. Ryu had been right when he’d said the youkai was inherently arrogant and probably thought himself to about as close to perfection as was possible in something this side of one of the kami, but he had also continually stopped throughout their session to check and make sure she was doing okay and was enjoying herself, that he wasn’t going too slow or too fast for her taste.

It was touching really, even if a touch exasperating at times, and she wasn’t sure if this was how he was with all his clients or if it was special with her because he liked her. Yes, this only their second night, but it was painfully obvious that the youkai liked her; she just wasn’t sure to what extent yet.

At the close of the hour he’d pulled her into a tight embrace as if to forbid her to move from their cocoon under the blankets, not even relenting when she saw the clock chime her time to leave.

“Kouga, I need to go now. You know I only paid for one hour.”

“I’m sure you know the rest of my schedule was cleared right?” He smirked as he felt her head nod against his shoulder. “Then that means I have the rest of the night off and it’s mine to do with as I please.” He whispered in her ear, voice pitched low, “And it pleases me very much to keep you right where you are.”

Kagome pushed herself up on her arm to look him in the face. “I – I can’t do that. I’d feel like I was cheating the system, like I was taking advantage of both you and the Shrine somehow.”

He brushed the backs of his fingers against her face, smirk widening to a grin, eyes gleaming. “How like my woman to be so considerate and fair. Then I tell you what – it’s only 1:30, so you should be up before noon right? How about you meet me in the market at 1:00 and we’ll go grab some grub. I’ll be off and out of the Shrine, so does that work for you?”

She hesitated a moment, pondering more over his term for her than his proposition. He’d been calling her that all night but she really wasn’t sure what it meant. Was this some weird demon thing?

Nodding, she turned to slide off the bed and put her clothes back on. “Yes, that should work fine. It’ll be good to go out with someone who actually knows his way around this town. Can we go exploring a little bit too?”

“You got it babe.”

Satisfied, Kagome pulled her purse on and unlatched the door. “See you tomorrow then,” she called, waving over her shoulder as she headed down the hall. Then with a quick goodnight to Ryu she headed home for some much needed sleep.

~ ~ ~

It didn’t hit Kagome until she was out her door that Kouga had never specified exactly where to meet. The market was a big place and she didn’t fancy milling around the place for hours until she ran into him.

As if she wasn’t nervous enough already.

What am I doing here? Is it okay for me to be seen with a Tetsudai outside the Shrine? Is he even allowed out with clients during the daytime? I suppose he must be since he offered, and I’m sure he wouldn’t want either of us to get in trouble…

Her next thought made her pause.

Does this constitute as a date?

Luckily she was saved from following this thought through by the sudden arrival of Kouga, who found her just as she set food inside the market square.

“Kouga!” she exclaimed, surprised at seeing him turn up so quickly. “How on earth did you find me so fast?”

“I am a wolf youkai, woman. I could smell you a mile away!” His trademark crooked grin appeared at her blush.

“I didn’t know your sense of smell was quite that strong. I mean I can barely smell anything other than that fish stall right there,” she nodded her head to the left to indicate the man peddling his catch, “and I figured it’d be even more overpowering for you with all the competing scents.”

Another thought appeared to her and she looked at him with horror.

“I smell that strong?! Oh no, do I smell bad? Do I stink, is that why it’s so strong? I swear I took a shower just this morning – ”

“No Kagome,” Kouga interjected smoothly, grasping one hand in his. “You just smell like a woman, that’s all. Anyone else whose scent I know I could also pick out from a good distance. I just have a vested interest in yours,” he waggled his eyebrows, “so it comes a bit more easily than others.”

Kagome decided to forgo questioning him about his ‘vested interest’ as he pulled her into a section of the market she’d never seen before.

Bright colors were all around her, silks hanging not only from vendor stalls but also from stall to stall across the lane, turning the ordinary dirt path into something of an exotic hall she thought only existed in fantasy books.

Staring in open-mouthed wonder at the beautiful masterpiece of woven fabrics and tricks of light she happened to catch the eye of an old woman at a scarf stand. The woman never looked away but as Kagome followed Kouga around a corner she swore it was … admiration, yes admiration in her gaze.

Glancing around she noticed more of the same reactions from others, ranging from admiration and respect to – she swore – even a smug, knowing glance from one particularly beautiful bird youkai.

It caught her attention even more that not a single seller had called out to them trying to hock their wares but that instead everyone was keeping something of a distance from the two in the lane.

Kagome shuffled a little closer to Kouga, squeezing his hand a little tighter for reassurance as she felt quite lost in it all.

“I’ve never been back to this part before. Where are we going?”

“You said you wanted to see a bit of the city, right? I figured we’d start off by taking the scenic route to my favorite restaurant. Women always seem to like the bright colors, am I right?”

She nodded, oddly touched that he’d thought to take the long way in order to show her something so uniquely beautiful. Of course, it had absolutely nothing to do with his wish to hold her hand for as long as possible…

The restaurant turned out to be open-aired with a casual atmosphere, making Kagome somewhat more comfortable after all the disconcerting interaction so far. Curiously, she saw that while there was no hostess station and no place for reservations to be made it was obvious that the two of them were expected and were ushered immediately to the best table in the place. He gently ushered her toward the chairs and she was further amazed when their food appeared on the table immediately.  

“Kouga,” she questioned hesitantly, “what is all this? We haven’t ordered yet so shouldn’t we send it back? Whatever table this belongs to is probably starving at this point.”

He simply shrugged and dug into the closest plate to him. “I let them know beforehand that I was coming here and they know my tastes. I just had to guess what you might like,” he gestured toward the plates sitting in front of her, “but if you’d prefer something else just let me know and I’ll have them bring that instead.”

She shook her head quickly and waved her hands in front of her face. “No, of course not! This is fine, just…unexpected.”

The two were silent for a while. Kouga busy eating and while Kagome could normally carry on a full conversation during a meal just as well during any other time, her mind was preoccupied with the odd events of the day. She couldn’t pick out just what it was that was grabbing her attention, but something about the way other people had been reacting to them just seemed…off, different from what she’d anticipated.

Quite suddenly Kouga finished his food and looked up at her intensely. “I brought you out here today not only to spend time with you but because I want to ask you something.”

She nodded for him to continue, unsure where he was going with this that would cause him to be so serious.

“I want you to be my woman, Kagome, officially.” He grabbed her hand again and brought it to his mouth. Kagome was too stunned to even think of stopping him.

“What do you mean by that?” She asked, truly baffled.

“I was married once, to a lovely youkai named Ayame. She had wild red hair and an even wilder personality. We’d been betrothed from the time I was 13 years old and it took me a long time to get used to the idea, even longer to realize I truly did love the little scrap of a girl.” He smiled wistfully at the memory.

Kagome put her hand on his arm in sympathy.

“It’s been over 50 years since she died but youkai mate deeply and it took me a while, but now I am most definitely ready to move on.”

He paused dramatically and his eyes bore into her, smoldering

“Many demons who lose their mates take a human for their second spouse-”

“Wait,” she interrupted breathlessly, “you mean-” She cut off as she started to hyperventilate.

Kouga grabbed her up by both hands and started to pull her from the restaurant. “Come on,” he said, “It seems we’d better continue this conversation somewhere else.”

“Kouga, stop.” She tried to dig in her feet and he turned to look at her in question. “The bill, we haven’t even paid yet!”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” he waved her off with one hand, other tugging her more firmly behind him. “Tetsudai never have to pay for anything in the city. It’s the restaurant’s privilege to serve the Shrine in such a manner.”

“But, but Inuyasha…”

“Inuyasha’s a hanyou,” he stated, as though that was all the answer she needed.

And it was. It wasn’t Inuyasha’s position as a Tetsudai that kept him confined to the walls of the Shrine; it was his status as a hanyou.

It suddenly all made sense. The special treatment at the restaurant, the looks from everybody in the street – they all looked at him with respect and her with a mingling of awe and jealousy. They all thought…

“Everybody we saw today knew you were going to ask this of me, didn’t they?” She felt like such a fool to not have seen it earlier.

Kouga slowed his steps when he noticed her change in demeanor and gave a heavy sigh. “It’s not everyday you see a demon and a human walking the streets openly together.”

She nodded silently, grateful that he was leading them into progressively less crowded parts of the city so she wouldn’t be subjected to any further prodding eyes. They walked on quietly, each in their own thoughts. Finally, when Kouga was satisfied they’d come to a private enough sector of the city, he turned to her.

“You know, if you want you could take me on a trial run.” He grinned widely but his attempt at levity was lost when she saw the serious depth in his eyes.

“What does that mean?”

“Just what it sounds like. Clients aren’t always able to get away from their jobs for any length of time in order to visit the Shrine itself so Tetsudai are able to be… ‘rented’ out – if you want to call it that – so the clients can worship in the closest shrine or even their own homes. Of course, during this time since we wouldn’t be officially anything other than Tetsudai and worshipper you’d still have to pay the Shrine fees, but it’d give you time to get a bit more used to me. Or, if you really want, I’ll follow you on my own volition, not as a worker from the Shrine, and we can get to know each other that way.”

He grinned and Kagome could detect just the tiniest hint of shyness and maybe even insecurity in the gesture. Could he really like her that much?

“I…I just don’t know Kouga. This is rather sudden and I’m not sure what to think about it…” Honestly, that was putting it kindly. Kagome was currently wondering if the earth was still round or had shifted its axis to put her in such a crazy situation. How was a girl supposed to respond to something like this? Getting a proposal after only two days of knowing a guy, from someone from another species no less, was bound to throw anyone for a loop.

“That’s okay, Kagome, I know I’ll win you over sooner or later.” His arrogance was back and she had sensed just the slightest emphasis on his ‘sooner’. “Tell you what, why don’t you head on back and get some sleep. I guarantee you; you’ll need it by tonight.” He leaned in and his lecherous smirk did funny things to her stomach.

Suddenly all she wanted to do was get away from him, from the whole situation, and find a place to quietly think. She desperately wished one of her friends were here right now; she would kill for someone to confide in. Sadly she knew there was no one in town she trusted with such a situation and her friends hadn’t been here and wouldn’t understand. “That sounds good. I’ll see you tonight then.”

She turned and started walking, then paused and smiled back at him sheepishly. “Kouga?”

His heart immediately raced. Was she going to accept him right now after all?

“I wasn’t really paying attention when you brought us here, you know, thinking about…that and all, and…can you show me how to get back to the entrance?”

He’d never loved her more than in that moment. The girl really was too sweet and innocent for her own good. “Sure babe, no problem.”

~ ~ ~

The night had gone fine as far as Kagome was concerned. Kouga hadn’t said anything further about his proposal, which he’d probably assumed was a good idea since she’d been so tense he’d needed to spend extra time just to give her a massage in order for her to loosen up.

They’d ended the session with Kouga curled around Kagome, snuggled her deeper into his arms, and getting a promise out of her that they’d meet again the next day at the market. The ookami youkai was feeling quite satisfied with himself as Kagome left his room and he stretched languidly on his bed, his mind racing with plans of how he’d win her affection the following day…or night.

~ ~ ~

Her time with Kouga the next day in the market was surprisingly comfortable. Kagome had been paranoid she’d be unaccountably nervous around someone who’d just proposed marriage to her, especially someone she hadn’t answered, but they were able to fall into easy conversation and she honestly felt like she’d known him for ages.

They went to another restaurant where they received the exact same treatment as the day before, only this time she wasn’t caught off guard when they skipped the bill. She even learned to appreciate the looks they got walking down the narrow lanes.

They’d found a small sector that had games and seemed to be set up for a coming festival – they seemed to be quite common in the neighborhoods surrounding the Shrine - but since it was daytime it was still relatively deserted. Of course, the real crowds only came at nighttime, but they were having a time of it all the same. Kouga had won her prize after prize to the point where she’d laughingly had to start refusing them. His downcast features upon her rejection of the newest proffered item only caused her to giggle harder and she threw her arms around him for a quick hug to assure him she wasn’t mad with him. The instant light in his eyes made her breath catch – it was beyond belief to think that she could so affect someone.

She decided to try her hand at the newest game they’d come to where she had to knock down three bottles piled on each other. Unfortunately, despite years of practicing archery, her aim wasn’t the best and her pitiful attempts had both she and Kouga in tears before long. Suddenly, with no warning at all, he grabbed her around the waist, swung her into his arms, and kissed her soundly.

At first she was too stunned to think clearly, let alone react. Then came confusion, followed by elation (hey, it wasn’t everyday she had hot males pouncing on her in the middle of the street), followed by more confusion, and finally discomfort.

Still, she wasn’t sure what it was, but there was something small niggling in the back of her brain that kept her from enjoying the kiss as she should. After all, she enjoyed the youkai’s company. He was kind, gentle, and funny. Okay, so maybe he was a bit arrogant and dense, but no one was perfect after all, right?

Maybe it was just because he was a Tetsudai. A Shrine prostitute wasn’t supposed to kiss, were they? Did it matter if it was in or out of session? Were they even allowed to be doing this?

But if that were the issue then why hadn’t she minded Inuyasha’s kiss?

She broke away from him slowly and pushed him off from her, unaware that they had become so thoroughly entangled around each other. Kouga looked down at her, the smug glint in his eyes rapidly changing to confusion when she refused to look him in the face.

Hesitantly he reached for her again. “Kagome…”

“I…” she cut him off. “I…why did you kiss me?”

He blinked. Wasn’t that obvious? “Well because I – ”

She interrupted him again, giving him a falsely large smile that even he didn’t believe for a moment. “I’m suddenly really tired. Do you think we could leave now?”

Stunned, he nodded silently at her, following in her wake as she led them from the grounds, not daring to move beside her and take her hand.

What on earth had just happened?

~ ~ ~

Night came too quickly for Kagome’s taste. Her head was still swirling with everything that had gone on between her and Kouga the last three days and she was completely at a loss. The prospect of seeing him when she felt so unsettled wasn’t a particularly pleasant one.

Still, she was not a coward and certainly wouldn’t avoid a friend over something as inane as a case of jittery nerves. She marched her way to his room, not bothering to buzz as she entered. She figured once a guy proposes to you that sweeps away any need for formality.

She both internally winced and sighed at relief to see the way his face brightened as she appeared. He really was just too sweet and she could only hope to get a husband so kind. So then why was that thing in the back of her mind still making her uneasy? Was this awkwardness really just a result of his being a Tetsudai?

He stood from his position on the bed and reached for her, enveloping her in his arms and she melted against him, soaking in the sense of familiar security she somehow found in him. Framing her face in his hands he brought his lips down on hers very faintly, completely undemanding, as if he were afraid she’d bolt at any moment.

Kagome knew he may be pushy and a bit arrogant, but he really did care for her.

Sensing when she didn’t immediately pull back Kouga deepened the kiss, pressing her firmly against him, and all sense of euphoria left her. She fought against a vague sense of rising panic – she refused to give into it when she could see no cause for it.

After all, this was Kouga for cripes sake! They were able to joke around like they’d known each other for ages. She was comfortable around him like she would be around an old friend or even her own brother, so what was the problem?

A dark light went off in her head. Did I just say…brother?

So if Kouga was on the same level as her brother then did that mean it was like…kissing a brother? Kissing a brother! Ewww… Oh my gosh, Kissing Souta! Kissing SOUTA! KISSING SOUTA!!!

Kagome pulled back on a shocked gasp which Kouga misinterpreted as excitement and took the opportunity to move his mouth to her throat. She fought to keep herself under control under the new revelation. There was no use in panicking – she was already here and needed to go through with her appointment or risk wasting good money and letting down her family, not to mention utterly hurting the poor youkai who was … currently … taking off her shirt.

Oh my goodness…

She took a few deep, calming breaths. It was simple enough – all she had to do was not think of Souta and she’d be fine. But damn if that wasn’t like telling somebody to not scratch at their nose – it only made it worse. Now all she could think about was her little brother. She was sure there was going to receive some ugly mental scarring from this moment.

Her mind raced as Kouga lowered her onto the bed; she needed something else to think about! Anything! She tried oden, a basket full of kittens, Kazuma falling on his face in front of everyone, rainbows, the most romantic scene from her favorite movie…anything that made her happy. Nothing worked.

Her breath was coming in shaky pants now and she had to marshal all her will to keep from shoving Kouga off her. Her hands were trembling and she fisted them at her sides to hide the movement from him. There had to be something…

Then she thought of him. Her mind was filled with long silver hair and gruff words and before she could help it she found herself responding. Her fingers raked against his back and she arched up into him. He groaned in pleasure at her advances and she instantly froze, horrified.

If she hadn’t been paralyzed she would’ve curled up into herself. She had just thought about one man while she was with another. How could she do something like that? What did that make her, a whore?

Kagome bit back a sob, glad it was caught up in the rest of the noises being made in the room and Kouga didn’t take any particular notice.

She wasn’t quite sure what word would describe her now; she just knew she felt dirty, like the slimiest person to ever walk the face of the earth. She could only pray that the night be over quickly and that Kouga would forgive her for her errant thoughts and for the fact that she couldn’t ever see him again like this.

~ ~ ~

Kouga, much to Kagome’s surprise – and chagrin – only looked the slightest bit fazed when she announced she would be finding another Tetsudai for the following night. It was evident by the confident countenance that appeared only moments after his dismissal that he wasn’t giving up. On the contrary, he was still dead set on claiming her as his own and was sure this would only be a temporary delay.

He insisted that they continue to meet during the day and while at first Kagome declined he pressed so hard that eventually she gave in. After all, she did still see him as a friend and it would be nice to have something to do during the daytime other than study her dusty library books or stare at the wall to make faces and shapes out of the different textures.

Ultimately they departed on good terms: Kouga determined as ever and Kagome viciously sick to her stomach.

The next two nights she tried as hard as she could to immerse herself in the new Tetsudai she chose each session but the same queasy feeling stole over her every time they touched her. She couldn’t shake the feeling of filth that surrounded her, threatening to bury her until she suffocated.

She couldn’t understand what was happening; it was too much for her to try to deal with and she could not think of a single person she could talk to about it…except one. And try as she might she found it impossible to try and avoid it, and him.

That was how she found herself here now, in the very last place she was supposed to be. Inuyasha’s door loomed in front of her, more intimidating than anything she’d ever seen before.

Taking a deep breath she steeled herself and then slowly raised her hand to ring.

~ ~ ~

A/N: Yes, I know, sad times for all the InuKag pullers out there, but I promise our cute little hanyou will be back and all over the next chapter. Our heroine couldn't keep away for long I assure you ^_-

Again thanks to seren1tystar and Akihana for keeping me in line here - otherwise I assure you all you'd have gotten a crappier version of this chapter (and probably later too for good effect)

And still, mucho mucho thanks to all who review this story. I have been severely lacking in motivation and knowing you guys actually like this fic is what kicks me in the tucas when I need it.

~ ~ ~

Original posting: March 6, 2007