InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Temporal Sequence ❯ Chapter 20

This story placed 1st in the IYFG for Best Canon! Thanks to all of you who voted for it and a special thanks to PlayingWithDemons, sesshys_jaded_ samurai and Quirkyslayer for getting this story through the nomination process. Thanks for your persistent support of my story.

 

Most importantly, thanks to all you guys who were kind enough to leave me a review—they keep me writing. Sorry for the confusion centered around last chapter's ending, but it was done on purpose, as you will see. Thanks again!

 

Temporal Sequence

 

Chapter 20:

 

It was her anger intermingled with fear that had sparked the memory. A dreadful memory followed by snippets of an equally horrific one, both similar in nature. He had tried to kill her, twice in fact.

 

She had been irritable all day and he found it odd. Not that he was unaccustomed to her moods, but rather he was perplexed since her anger usually followed a clear path of cause and effect. This time, however, the cause was unidentifiable. After her brazen comment, which was a rather pathetic attempt to slight him, he'd had no intention of frightening her, or letting her win for that matter. He wouldn't stoop so low as to play her childish game and satisfy her by mimicking her ridiculous and unfounded mood. He had only intended to make a scathing remark in order to knock her back into perspective. But things didn't always go as planned.

 

Apparently, the way he stood, which was purposely methodical, but only to give himself ample time to formulate a proper retort, she began to panic and fear vied for dominance over her rage. He didn't understand the cause of this fear, which had yet to mark her with its ghastly scent in his presence. Just as his mind searched for a plausible answer, a blurred memory crept into his sight. The rain dulled his senses and so he felt the need to get as close to her as possible. The lesser the distance between them, the clearer the memory became.

 

A tomb—his father's tomb—filled his vision, a spellbound sword the focus of his sight. He couldn't pull the sword from its pedestal and magic bit his skin, burning, like his chest. He remembered feeling the flames of rage licking at his heart. Even in death his father had denied him. Not only the Tetsusaiga, but also his presence, choosing instead to hide his tomb's whereabouts from the only son that could even recall his face.

 

He had invited Inuyasha to follow and wished he hadn't. His fury was fresh when Inuyasha and that human girl entered the tomb. He could hardly control his rage, seeing as how Inuyasha had brought a human wench with him. A hanyou was unworthy enough to enter the final resting-place of a powerful youkai, but due to heritage, it was deemed acceptable. A filthy mortal, especially a female mortal, had no right to desecrate his father's tomb with her sickly presence.

 

Luckily, his pride did remain intact; contrary to the little harlot's voiced sentiments. He couldn't stand her from the moment he saw her; she was a human female after all. Her comments to Inuyasha only heightened his hate, but he was able to ignore her since Inuyasha failed to procure the Tetsusaiga as well. He remembered cutting words leaving his tongue, but he didn't care. He only hoped that the cuts were deep. A fight ensued and he was confident that his promise to himself would finally be fulfilled. Then, the unexpected happened.

 

The girl, the human girl, pulled the sword from its pedestal, a feat that neither a youkai or a hanyou could accomplish. And that was unacceptable. That time, however, he didn't have to wait fifty years to see his failure. He hated her for it—for making him witness his own failure while his brother was present—and in his father's tomb no less.

 

Again, his father denied him. The fang of his father saved her life. He wondered in that moment if his father was laughing at him from beyond the grave. That thought resulted in a blinding fury, prompting him to transform so that he could flaunt his power over his brother—the one his father had preferred.

 

Then, Inuyasha severed his arm in one clean, powerful slice. The Tetsusaiga accepted him and Sesshoumaru felt like a fool.

 

“It was not wise for him to fight us in his primal form. A lack of tactical wisdom in such a powerful being is indicative of lunacy.”

 

Had he gone mad? He imagined Kazuma turning his back to him in that moment. His chest clenched as he fell, his father's tomb diminishing, the end far from sight.

 

“Blind fury will be your downfall, boy.”

 

He laughed to himself then, knowing that Kazuma was and had always been right. It was a horrible realization from the past, reaffirming its truth as he bled. Kazuma had once told him to forget his feelings for his father, implying the potential of danger of sentimentality. He wished he'd listened, but then again, burning hatred was difficult to ignore, much less vanquish into nothingness.

 

Upon remembering how he hated to be made a fool, he resolved himself to pick up the pieces of his pride and he escaped that world, once again intent on keeping his vow to kill his brother.

 

The next time he met them, their group had grown, but that didn't matter. He had a human arm granting him the ability to wield the Tetsusaiga. Inuyasha was the son of the proud Inu no Taishou; he wouldn't let the humans interfere.

 

He took his father's fang with ease and once again flaunted his immense power with childish glee. His brother had always brought out the worst in him. That impudent wench interfered, despite his and Inuyasha's warnings. She knew things she shouldn't have known and he felt the stinging onset of fury. It became blinding when she transformed the Tetsusaiga back into a dull, useless blade. It needed time to overcome her magic and he realized then that she was a miko. He itched to slay one.

 

The foolish girl ignored his second warning, which was foolhardy indeed. She should have accepted his rare generosity—he never gave second chances. Then again, he was going to kill her anyway, after he dealt Inuyasha the finishing blow.

 

Her arrow was weak—her power of purity even weaker—and he caught it easily, deliberately melting it into oblivion so that he could bask in her growing fear. And bask he did. As luck would have it, the Wind Scar failed, its power still not fully regenerated. He figured the after effects and debris would do her in, but Inuyasha shielded her. He became irritated and Inuyasha became inspired. The hanyou was more fearsome after the miko's near death experience, making him wonder if sentimentality had some positive points.

 

His fury at a second failure consumed him and he became careless, although he didn't realize it until the Tetsusaiga switched hands. He swore he heard his father's laughter.

 

A human woman pulled the Tetsusaiga from its bed of stone—something he could not do. A human woman reversed the Tetsusaiga's transformation—again, something he could not do. She was powerful. Not in the sense that she posed a genuine threat to him, but rather she was powerful in her ability to manipulate a situation. That alone had caused him to fail and she deserved to die for it. But it was not meant to be on that day.

 

No, Riku was wrong—he had to be. Fate could not possibly exist, for such an omnipotent entity could not be unjust enough to continuously deny one person. That was what he had thought as he walked away from an unconscious Inuyasha, still miraculously wielding a sword. Going after the annoying miko would be too troublesome. He wanted to kill Inuyasha first anyhow and seeing the change she caused within the hanyou when her life was threatened made him hesitant to take her out beforehand. On second thought, her death would make Inuyasha a more enjoyable opponent. Perhaps sentimentality was a force to be reckoned with.

 

He was wicked; Kagome was pure. Why was she here with him? That question suddenly became more important than any wonderment of a future five hundred years away. It was obvious that she had forgiven him, but he wanted to know the motivation behind it. Had he actually done something to repent his sins toward her? He couldn't help but believe otherwise.

 

He pulled his legs out from under him and stretched one out lazily and kept the other upright, bent at the knee. Tenseiga was still gripped between his fingers and he propped up in between his legs, resting his forehead upon its hilt. He once thought his inheritance useless, furthering his belief that his father had always hated him. But now, he wasn't so sure. He remembered unparalleled pain. Pain that should have killed him, but it didn't. Not with Tenseiga strapped to his hip.

 

Tenseiga was a beautiful sword. It was smooth and perfect, quite contrary to Tetsusaiga. Two different swords crafted from the same set of fangs, both intrinsically likened to their masters. That thought made him smile.

 

He brushed his thumb down Tenseiga's sheath, wondering if he should try harder to forgive his father. Perhaps his father wasn't laughing at him beyond the grave; maybe he was sighing in disappointment. The thought was brief, however, replaced by a much different musing as he appreciated the smoothness of his sword's sheath. He wondered if Kagome would feel as smooth. He didn't doubt that she would, but she'd be much, much softer.

 

He then remembered the way she looked at him that afternoon when the monk appeared, only to take her away. Hungry curiosity dominated her eyes as she slowly consumed the planes of his chest and shoulders. In that moment, he knew he could have her if he sought to take her.

 

Why would she look at him like that? He was too wicked to be worthy of her affection.

 

He envisioned the generous curve of her hips and the way she licked her lips. His previously comfortable sweatpants weren't so roomy anymore. He wondered when he last felt this way—hot and unsatisfied. As the drizzling rain fell upon him, he thought that his body must have been contributing to the curdling fog.

 

He didn't think he was mistaken, but he hated being made the fool. If his assumption was wrong, then he'd most definitely feel like a fool. Perhaps he should test his theory, but how would he do so without being too forthcoming?

 

With her eyes, she followed the path of his shoulder to his collarbone and over his chest. Being a man, he knew that every male liked a slender neck, plump breasts and a round derriere, but those were universal points of attraction. On top of those, every man had his own unique aspect of female physicality that drove him mad. Kazuma, for example, had a strange leg fetish. Sesshoumaru, on the other hand, loved wide hips, of which the gods had generously bestowed upon Kagome. Though he had never before cared enough to discover, he figured women must be similar. Could his shoulders be one of those for Kagome? His chest too? Perhaps he should try wearing a shirt less often and see what happens. However, he wasn't so sure that he wanted to have her, especially in that context. She was pure and human and she loved his brother. But he'd never had a human female before…

 

He sighed with indecision and leaned back against the tree, Tenseiga sliding down his arm to rest against his shoulder. Again, he wondered if his father was laughing at his thoughts. But thoughts were thoughts and he couldn't choose their path. His pants became even more of a hindrance as he imagined sliding his hand over Kagome's bare hip. He ignored the discomfort as it was enticingly balanced by a pleasurable feeling. He remembered why he liked sex so much. The feeling of desire was always at odds with the feeling of insatiability, a beautiful conflict that ended in such alleviating resolution.

 

For the first time in what seemed like an eternity, Sesshoumaru allowed himself the reprieve of a fantasy. It was nice to daydream and he wondered why he put his imagination on hold for so long.

 

If only he could get Kagome out of his head.

 

x x x

 

The rain slowed considerably as they walked, both huddled under the small umbrella. If it had been Sesshoumaru walking with her, she figured he'd refuse the meager shelter, saying something along the lines of: “That is not necessary.” Miroku, on the other hand, didn't seem to mind the tight quarters.

 

Despite his awkward timing, she was really glad to see him. She needed to talk to someone other than Sesshoumaru.

 

“What am I doing?” They were so close that she could feel him turning his head to look at her.

 

“Taking a leisurely stroll. Honestly, Kagome-sama, where has your head been?”

 

“I'm being serious, Miroku. What am I doing?”

 

She could feel him take a deep breath. “What you always do—try to help people. I would never have imagined that you'd stay with him after he regained consciousness, but I suppose things got complicated when you realized he didn't know who he was. It would've been cruel to leave him like that. I suppose you also thought it a good opportunity to learn why he hates Inuyasha. It's admirable, really, but sometimes people don't want to be helped. This time it is rather odd.”

 

“So I'm a busybody, huh?”

 

She could feel him smile. “No, not really. You're the type that hates to see conflict, especially unnecessary conflict that comes between family. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru-sama are brothers. You want to know why they hate each other so that you can help them come to terms. Unfortunately, you choose quite the troubled pair.”

 

“Well, I guess it just seemed easy because Sesshoumaru couldn't remember anything. Even Inuyasha made it seem so easy!”

 

“Don't take this the wrong way, but Inuyasha isn't taking this so well.”

 

“What? He seemed okay with it.”

 

“Has Inuyasha ever been okay with Sesshoumaru-sama?”

 

“No, I guess not,” she replied lazily, her tone seeming to synchronize with the languorous rain. She suddenly felt like she lacked the energy to have this conversation.

 

“Inuyasha fought with himself over this. I think he did well, though. He was angry about your decision to help Sesshoumaru-sama and he was even angrier that you lied to him. But, he took into account the recent rift between you two and made a wise choice. I applaud him for his efforts. It's been hard for him.”

 

Just thinking of Inuyasha made her tired, but she couldn't ignore Miroku's words. She hadn't put much thought into how difficult it was for Inuyasha to openly accept what she was doing. She felt really inconsiderate all of a sudden. “He asked you for advice, didn't he?”

 

“Yes. I warned him of the ramifications of losing his cool. He heeded my advice for once,” Miroku said, sounding a little too proud and entirely too cheerful.

 

“Do you think what I'm doing is okay?”

 

“Kagome, I've always kept your secrets and respected your feelings. I understand that you needed to keep this from the others, but me? I only wish that you would have confided in me.” His voice was fading, like the rain.

 

“I'm sorry.” She, too, was fading. If only she could disappear…

 

“It's fine, really. I know how you are. I think lower youkai might have killed him just for being a taiyoukai. A warrior should die in battle, not while unconscious and helpless. Though it is hard to imagine Sesshoumaru-sama being helpless,” he said, laughter hiding within his tone. It made her feel a little better—just a little. “I do understand your reasoning as far as that's concerned, but you were careless. I would have accompanied you. My cursed hand would've ensured our safety.”

 

“I can be careless when it comes to my own safety.”

 

“I know. I just don't understand why you're still with him. Personally, I could care less about their history. They fight now, in the present, and that's just how it is. I don't like interfering with family matters. Had you told me, though, I would have been worried. He is quite deadly, but he has also stopped pursuing Inuyasha's blood. I wonder why, but I guess I've always assumed it was because they found a common enemy. Maybe that's not the whole truth. However, it does seem unlikely that he would attack you. There would be no honor in killing a fragile human woman. But he is a youkai, and they can be unpredictable when injured. I'm curious, though. Why did you want to help him so badly?”

 

“I actually didn't put much thought into him being killed while vulnerable,” she admitted, feeling like a fool. “But his injuries were unusually devastating and for a moment I thought they might kill him. The truth is that I've always felt useless, but every now and then I can save someone. I'm always the one needing to be rescued and I've usually gotten to return the favor at least once. I saved you when you were poisoned. I saved Inuyasha from Yura and the spider demons and I even stopped the tainted shards from killing Kouga. I've never been able to return the favor to Sesshoumaru. I wanted to erase my debt.”

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama has never intended to save you, whereas the others you spoke of have. He probably never even considered it a debt.”

 

“You're probably right, but there's that little girl that follows him around. She worships him, like a father.”

 

“You really are admirable, Kagome-sama.” Again, she felt him smile and this time it was contagious. She smiled beneath the dark cover of the umbrella as a comforting warmth rose from the ground.

 

“Thanks, Miroku. I needed to hear that. But, why did you show up today?” She really was surprised to see him. She wasn't surprised in the moment of his arrival, not with the sound of rain on plastic, and her mixed feelings subdued her shock. But now, she really wanted to know what had prompted his visit.

 

“Well, Inuyasha told me what you were doing and I knew you wanted your peace so I tried to stay away, but in the end I couldn't. You have a lot of weight on your shoulders, in this era and your own. You don't get any reprieves. I figured this was a rare opportunity for you to relax. But, I was worried…and…curious.”

 

“Curious? About what?”

 

“I was just dying to see how you and Sesshoumaru-sama interacted! I never would have imagined! I know I spoiled an intimate moment, but your eyes were swollen and I was afraid that he had hurt your feelings, and then he came and took your hand—“

 

“Miroku!”

 

“Have I embarrassed you? You're a grown woman now and grown women have needs—there's nothing to be ashamed of. The gods know how frigid Inuyasha is and so this must be a blessing for you. Trust me, the reality of it is far superior to the dreams!”

 

Embarrassed felt like an understatement. She was actually beginning to think that maybe he hadn't noticed or that perhaps he was just being considerate and wasn't going to say anything. She was dead wrong.

 

“I…I…don't know what you're talking about!”

 

He laughed and she could feel it in her chest. “Seriously, I wish the well would allow Sango and I through. I could treat my eyes to all the scantily clad women and maybe Sango would loosen up a bit!”

 

“What?”

 

“I'd be a happy man if Sango looked at me like you looked at Sesshoumaru-sama.”

 

“You must have misinterpreted it. I didn't look at him like—“

 

“You need to quit fighting your urges, Kagome-sama. Inuyasha hasn't pleasured you yet, so what makes you think that he will? And I'm not funny like that, but I can say with objective authority that Sesshoumaru-sama is a very handsome man. I've always wondered if youkai males were more generously endowed than humans since so many beautiful women seem uncannily attracted to them. You will tell me, won't you, Kagome-sama?”

 

She was speechless. She stopped walking and Miroku immediately noticed. It felt like her legs were made of stone.

 

“No need to panic. I'll give you all the pointers you need. If you're lucky, which I wouldn't doubt, then Sesshoumaru-sama will be quite the experienced lover.” He winked at her then. He winked at her! She closed her eyes and waited for lightning to strike her dead. “Don't be embarrassed. It's just me here.”

 

“He…he hates humans,” she ground out in a raspy voice. It didn't sound like her voice. It didn't even sound convincing.

 

“Apparently, there's a lot of things about Sesshoumaru-sama that don't fit. A human man stabbed him in the back and he simply walked away. I'm not calling Sesshoumaru-sama a liar, but I don't think he presents himself honestly. Like that little girl you talked about. If he hates her kind so much, then why does he keep her?”

 

She blinked, her stupor wearing off. She knew his hatred of humans was contrived, but it was difficult to believe that he'd even consider being with her in that way. She was entirely too plain. As always, Miroku knew what she was thinking.

 

“Is it so hard to imagine? You sell yourself short, Kagome-sama. You're beautiful and interesting. I think he's curious. For instance, I've always wondered what it'd be like to fool around with a youkai. She'd probably be a savage in the sack. So maybe it's not too far-fetched to think a youkai would be curious about a human.”

 

“Gods, Miroku, it sounds like you're encouraging this. And this just happens to be the product of your over-active imagination!” She hoped he'd buy it. She really needed to read a book on persuasive selling techniques.

 

“I just don't want you to wait around for Inuyasha. Enjoy your youth. It's okay to be with a man, Kagome-sama. I want you to experience it. On your current path, it'll be years before you know a man's touch. Trust me, sexual frustration really messes with you.”

 

“I have enough stress! I don't need you pushing me into something that'll probably never happen! I don't even want him!”

 

“I don't mean to push, but sex is the best stress reliever on earth! I think you have a better chance with him than you think. I think you want him, but you're convincing yourself that you don't because of Inuyasha. It's okay to want someone and have them without loving them. Just don't make it a habit.”

 

“What makes you think I want him? And for that matter, what makes you think I have a chance with him, Mr. Know-It-All?”

 

“You looked at him like he was the first bit of cool water you'd seen on a hot summer's day. Don't even try to deny it. As for your last question, when you looked at him like that, he smiled.”

 

Sesshoumaru smiled? She recalled his smirk, but she thought it was because he found her discomfort amusing. Could he—no, she wouldn't even think of it. “Okay, he's attractive, so sue me! That doesn't mean I'm entertaining thoughts of being with him!”

 

“Fair enough. I expected you to say something like that.”

 

“Then why'd you say all those ridiculous things?”

 

“To bring it to your attention. I'm simply planting the seed and it'll only grow from here.”

 

“What's that supposed to mean?”

 

“You just openly admitted that you find him attractive. With denial out of the way, the attraction is bound to grow. See, I'm not pushing you, just pointing you in the right direction.”

 

“How is that the right direction? You're talking about my virginity here!” She winced, realizing once again that her mouth was getting the better of her. Her careless words were only validating Miroku's beliefs.

 

“You need to get over Inuyasha and this is the easiest way! You pine for him and mourn over him. You've been in the process of moving on, but somehow or another your progress has stagnated. I hate seeing you wanton. It's high time to find a semblance of satisfaction in your life, Kagome-sama.”

 

It was true that she needed some satisfaction in her life, but she wasn't convinced that a fling with Sesshoumaru was the answer. She'd be better off finding a guy in her own time, as far-fetched as that sounded. Despite what Miroku said, she just couldn't believe that Sesshoumaru wanted her. A smile was simply not enough to verify that. Honestly, she shouldn't be considering these kinds of things anyway. She was just a sexually frustrated young woman who was inevitably lured toward a very attractive man. It was just an urge created by unfulfilled needs. She would not fall into temptation and she would not betray Inuyasha.

 

It was stupid, really. Sesshoumaru would never want her anyway.

 

x x x

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama!”

 

He jerked upright, his feet on the ground immediately. A female's voice screamed for him and he could only think of one female in the vicinity that knew him—Kagome must be in danger. The rain dulled his senses, but it was fading, although the elements remained rather meaningless. After tailing Kagome once, he knew the path she normally took when going home. Obviously the deceitful monk could have lured her elsewhere in order to accost her, but she had said she needed to go home to retrieve dry clothing and so he wasted no time in running toward that particular clearing, cursing himself for allowing her to leave with that questionable monk. He didn't trust that man, not from the time he had first met him that village. Well, it wasn't the first time they had met, but it might as well have been their first meeting.

 

Tenseiga was still gripped between his fingers as he ran, his beating heart silencing the steady thrum of rain. He didn't need a sharp sword to slay that monk. After a few moments had passed, he spotted the monk, alone and walking toward the campsite he had just abandoned. The monk looked shocked when Sesshoumaru appeared before him.

 

“Where is Kagome?” he asked lowly, ready to slice the monk's throat at the slightest indication of a lie.

 

“She's at home, but she'll be back soon.”

 

He didn't detect any fallacies, but something about the man just rubbed him the wrong way. “You're hiding something,” he stated threateningly, making circumvention an ill-fated option.

 

The monk smiled. “No, not at all. But I did want to speak with you about—“

 

Just as he was about to grab the monk's throat, the same screaming voice once again resounded in his head: “Sesshoumaru-sama!” He paused and discreetly surveyed his surroundings, the monk's unease complicating his inspection.

 

“Rin, do as you like.”

 

He froze as he recognized his own voice and realized that Kagome hadn't called for him. Kagome never used an honorific in conjunction with his name. It was a memory, a broken one. More importantly, who was Rin? Riku's face suddenly came to his mind, his lips moving, but the words remained unheard. Then flowers, beautiful white flowers, swayed with an imaginary breeze. He heard laughter and smelt sunshine. But it was raining.

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama?” the monk asked.

 

He saw those white blossoms strung together and looped over a thick, scaly neck. A raspy purr rumbled beneath his fingertips as bloodied hands grasped a set of leather reigns. A torrent of images ran through his mind and he pressed his fist to his forehead, willing the world inside his head to slow.

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama, are you all right?”

 

His head started pounding and his heart raced, each thrum painfully loud. He clenched his jaw and suddenly, the world grew silent. He could smell fresh fish and dirty mushrooms. She had been battered and she was unkempt. He didn't ask her, not at first, but her state of being grated on his nerves. It wasn't that she offended him, but rather the adults that allowed her appearance to deteriorate had angered him. Parents shouldn't neglect their children. But he wouldn't ask because he didn't care. He just wanted her to go away.

 

She didn't speak and he didn't mind. One day, when she came to him, she had fresh injuries and her eye was swollen shut. It was the worst he had seen her. The words just left his mouth, his tongue sealing his fate like a hot blade to a deep wound. She didn't tell him, just smiled, her laughter the only sound he could hear. She was strange and unafraid and she was just a child, an abandoned child, and a wolf had killed her. He wondered if she had ever known love, even for a moment.

 

His grip on Tenseiga tightened as he remembered her lifeless body. Her eyes were still open and dull and it disturbed him. He had said it was just a test. That was true; Tenseiga had finally reacted. But she had tried to help him, albeit unnecessarily. Humans didn't help demons, especially human females.

 

She was abandoned.

 

He cut down the pall-bearing imps.

 

“Sesshoumaru-sama, do you need to lie down?”

 

He looked at the monk that knew Kagome and saw Riku's face. The rain fell quietly around them, its scent seeming to cleanse his body.

 

“I can't remember the way she smells,” he whispered, still seeing the wrong man. Riku would have loved her, like he loved the rain.

 

“Who?”

 

“Nothing will turn a man faster than a woman.”

 

“Rin.”

 

x x x

 

 

Sorry for the wait, guys, but I've been really stressed lately. It's hard to write when my mind is clouded.