InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Botanist and the Beast ❯ Chapter 11: Fight or Slight ( Chapter 11 )

Disclaimer: I don't own, Sesshou, Rin and all other inu char's Takahashi Rumiko does. The characters from Alice in Wonderland belong to Lewis Carroll, they are used here without permission… I sold the Dodge to a junk yard for $100 which I spent on groceries… I'm almost certain no one wants the resulting materials.

 

The Botanist and the Beast

Chapter 11: Fight or Slight

Dear Alice,

Serpents! Serpents everywhere! Night and day serpents! There's no pleasing them! I've not slept in three days. GIVE ME BACK MY EGGS! SERPENTS!

-Mother Pigeon

 

I left my sword in the camp the next evening as I went about my chore of cleaning the dishes, but in my heart I knew it wouldn't be that simple. “Ningen, I will not be dissuaded so easily.” I sighed as I sat the pan I had been rinsing on the riverbank and stood up to face him.

 

I kept my voice calm and low as I addressed him, “Sesshomaru-sama, I respect your wish to do this, but I will not draw my sword against you.” I expected him to argue with me, but he quietly approached me and pressed my sword in my hands.

 

“Jaken and Ah-Un were powerless against the Mushi; I was preoccupied by Byakuya, only your actions gained them enough time to take Rin to safety. Luck is the only reason you did not die that day, I offer you the chance to make your continued survival rest on skill.” Well what do you say to that? I wondered as I stared down at the impassive weapon.

 

I placed my sheathed sword into the sash of my obi and quietly walked into the clearing. Taking a defensive stance I wordlessly drew my blade and waited. So began my nights off bruising abuse and my days of walking through endless abrasions and muscle aches.

 

Incongruous to his volatile nature he was a good teacher. By the time snow began to fall I had learned to defend myself against his swift attacks well enough that I had to tire before he could land a blow. I also could manage to attack as often as I blocked, though, I still had not successfully struck his person. Perhaps it is the confined nature of caves, or my own restless soul, but I found that as winter nights became longer, sleep became harder to find. So as my body adjusted to the new muscles I had to develop in my swordsmanship, I often found myself stepping out into the early winter nights, despite the chill, to walk off my nervous energy before finally finding sleep.

 

Wrapped in a hooded cloak I stared up into the moonless sky and thought about where my life had taken me. Learning sword fighting from an Inu-Daiyoukai in the feudal era, while in a constant quest to find other yokai to kill. While those same yokai try to kill you. I sighed, Byakuya, if he is an incarnation of this Naraku then we may be in some serious trouble. Though let us not let on to the high and mightily Sesshomaru-sama that he may be out numbered. Least of all suggest that his `worthless' brother and his friends may be able to help. I started walking again lost in my thoughts, From what I hear from Rin, Jaken and that old Miko the Tenseiga and Tessaiga are obviously more powerful in tandem, but what the hell was their father thinking to believe that would ever happen? I chuckled darkly, Though, if I ask Sesshomaru about it I should probably write my will first. That thought made me laugh out loud, My will. What do I own worth bequeathing? My jumbled thoughts where halted by my walking into something solid and my eyes focused on an all to familiar breastplate.

 

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph! That is extraordinarily tiresome!” I cried as I rubbed my abused nose. The immovable object I'd run into refused to respond and so I finally looked up at him and prompted, “And you came all the way out here to do that because you where bored and find it just absolutely hilarious I'm sure.”

 

“No.” Well duh?

 

“Alright I give up guessing.” I replied with a dismissive wave of my hand as I walked past him.

 

“You should not be roaming unarmed on a night such as this.” What the hell? I let my hand drop to rest on the hilt of my wakizashi.

 

“I'm not unarmed.” I replied, not bothering to slow my pace, but instead of leaving him behind, he fell into step beside me.

 

“Are you not troubled by the cold as Rin is? It preoccupied her all day.” What game are you playing now? I remembered one ill-fated ice fishing trip with my father to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

 

“I've been colder.”

 

We continued to walk in silence, but the enjoyment was shattered by his curious presence and so I turned back. We were almost to the cave when he spoke again, “There is a castle two days hence; we shall winter there.” All the mystery to tell me that?

 

“You could have saved yourself an hour's worth of trudging in the snow if you'd said that from the beginning.” I remarked wearyingly.

 

“It was not unpleasant.” He replied enigmatically as we entered the cave. I shook my head in confusion, but didn't want risk my voice echoing in the cavern and waking our companions to ask him what he meant. Not that he would give me a straight answer anyway. I thought sardonically as I shed my cloak and settled into the warm blankets next to Rin at Ah-Un's side.

 

The next day the snow began falling in earnest and the winds where so powerful that we couldn't see the rocks in front of the cave. As Rin and I dutifully packed the camp up, Sesshomaru eyed the weather keenly, while Jaken whined at him that we should wait the storm out right there. After twenty minutes of Jaken's complaining we were ready to leave and I was personally ready to kill the toad, but it was Sesshomaru's patience he was really trying, not mine. So I sat back and tried to enjoy the show.

 

“Sesshomaru-dono, please Rin and Donella-sama will freeze within the hour; they are only weak ningen…”

 

“Damare, Jaken we will just have to travel at a faster pace. Rin.” Ignoring the frog's sniveling he turned to the little girl.

 

“Yes Sesshomaru-sama?” she hoped to attention before her master with her usual, giggling cheer.

 

“We are in need of haste in this storm, it will worsen. You and Jaken shall ride Ah-Un. Wrap warmly.”

 

“But what about Donella-sama?” She asked in childish alarm. Yes, what of me, you megalomaniacal canine?

 

“She will travel with me.” He replied curtly as he stepped towards the cave mouth. Say what?!

 

Rin gave me an inscrutable look. “But Sesshomaru-sama…”

 

He let out an exasperated breath and cut her protest short, “She is too heavy for Ah-Un to carry with the further weight of Jaken and yourself. With that additional burden and the supplies, they would not be able to fly.”

 

He strode from the cave. Jaken and I moved to follow as Rin gave me one last unfathomable look before covering her mouth in helpless giggles and tugging on Ah-Un's lead.

 

Even with my douchuugi and cloak, I found that I had to huddle close to Sesshomaru in order to stay remotely comfortable while airborne. I spent the time with my eyes squeezed shut against the icy wind, shivering uncontrollably and resisting the urge the physically wrap myself around the living heater at my side. How the hell can he stay so warm? He must have molten lava running through his veins. Don't hug him, don't hug him, that way lays painful mutilation; don't hug him. Maybe if I were as cold and indifferent to everything around me I'd have a heat reserve too. He smells so good and his hair is so soft! I shivered for reasons other than cold as the silky strands teased my cheek in the wind. Different thoughts! NOW! Um, how much warmth is transferred from one person to the next in a hug, a smile, or a kind word? Can the temperature loss be measured in joules or calories? Can it be stored? Thoughts of this nature distracted me for a while as we flew through the chill morning air, but it soon became tiresome as the chill seeped onto my bones and made even my thoughts numb.

 

Gratefully what would have been a two-day trip, however, last only a few hours. As we landed in a castle courtyard a little past noon I let out an appreciative sigh. My numb feet caused me to stumble away from Sesshomaru as I hurried to be away from the disturbingly intimate contact the journey had required. I pitched forward towards the ground and knew that my frozen body wouldn't react fast enough to keep me from hitting the icy flagstones. How embarrassing, I hope I don't knock myself senseless. I thought detachedly as I tumbled helplessly, and then I was snatched back from the bruising impact by the tie of my obi and dragged gracelessly to my feet. I turned my head, not trusting my legs and looked at my savoir.

 

Sesshomaru was already walking towards the castle's entrance, and I figured he'd find me planting myself face first into the snow and stone amusing. Just when I think I've got him figured out, he proves he's still weirder and creepier than I suspect. “Arigato gozaimashita, Sesshomaru-sama.” I said softly as I moved to join the others. An imperceptible pause in his step was the only indication that his sensitive ears had heard me over the wind. Naw, that's my imagination, I thought cynically as I helped Rin clamber down from the dragon and started carrying items into the compound.

 

That night we ate together in castles common room, and though I didn't see him, I felt Sesshomaru's presence close. As I tucked Rin into bed and told her the story of `Peter Pan' I glanced at the paper bound door several times, expecting to see his silhouette. Yet though his aura was near, I never saw so much as a shadow. It wasn't until I went looking for something to read that I saw him again.

 

I ventured into a shelf-lined study with a low table at its heart surrounded by ornate cushions. My hair was still damp from my bath and I was wearing a borrowed kimono with a garish red and orange pattern and tied with a black silk obi. I was immensely glad that Jaken was nowhere to be found; The little toad would die of derision if he saw me in this get up.

 

It became evident as I took a book of poetry from the shelf and sat on a cushion that my good luck had ended, “That color compliments your hair.” I dropped my book in surprise as my heart jumped to my throat and I leaped to my feat.

 

His aura had been hovering close all day; I'd forced myself to ignore its incessant pull, and now here he is making me jump out of my skin as he addresses from the gloomy corners. “How someone as pasty as you can manage to conceal himself so thoroughly in the shadows is a trick ninja's would give their souls for.” I grumbled as I turned magnetically to face the sound of his voice.

 

He made a noncommittal noise as he stepped into the lamplight and retrieved my book from the floor. I eyed the offered volume apprehensively before I slowly reclaimed it from his grasp. “It would cost them more dearly to learn it.” He replied as I leaned against a shelf, crossed my arms and hugged the book to my chest. Is that humor?

 

“I'm sure you would still have a few pupils. Historically, assassins are always looking for ways to make their occupation less dangerous to themselves. Though the short cuts are often just as dangerous.”

 

“Do you believe that I would truly be interested in such?” He asked folding himself down at the table. Great, he thinks this is going to be a long conversation. I followed his lead and sat before replying.

 

“What would such a lowly ningen as myself know about your interests?” Leave me in peace.

 

“You are very presumptuous, for a ningen, I'm certain you have your own opinion.”

 

“I may at that, Sesshomaru-sama, but I don't wish to bore you with it.” I replied as I opened my book and let my eyes fall to the pages, Now leave. The lamp moved away from the paper and I looked up in annoyance at the petty yokai who had pushed the lamp. Petty, paltry princes pale to pretty piffling poodles…

 

I smiled tightly at him as I laboriously closed my book, placed it on the table and folded my hands on the cover before giving him and long-suffering look. “Is there a reason you are disturbing my peace, or should I assume it to be part of your suspicious and rancorous nature?”

 

“Rancorous…” he chewed on the word for a introspective moment, “I am curious, ningen, why did Wendy send her daughter for spring cleaning even though Peter did not return for her as he said he would?” I knew he was listening! A triumphant voice chimed in my head and I chuckled out loud at my own childishness.

 

“I have never liked that part of the tale myself. Frankly if I'd been Wendy I wouldn't have left Neverland for anything. I would have railed at Peter for forgetting his promise for so long, and I would certainly not have allowed my daughter to go back in my place.” I smiled sheepishly at my folded hands.

 

“If you do not approve of the heroine's actions, why did you tell the tale to Rin?” I looked up at him then and allowed my eyes to study the contours of his face as I answered.

 

“The outcome of any story is what the listener makes of it, the tale shouldn't be changed to fit them; it should convey something to alter that person. Peter Pan is a story about the unpleasantness of inevitable adulthood and growing older. It has its funny, happy moments, its drama and its romance, but those are only there so that no one looses interest before it reaches its moral. I may not like the ending personally, but it serves a function.” A slight frown creased his alabaster features.

 

“Why must all your tales have a meaning to them? Life is not that explicit nor significant.”

 

I smiled brightly, “Perhaps it is to make it more significant. Human life is often too short and too senseless. I find nothing wrong in attempting to find a meaning for it as long as one doesn't take any of it too seriously.”

 

“It is evident from your actions, ningen, that you do not value your own life, but why would you teach Rin such an brainless ethic?” His voice was slightly angry and it caused my budding good humor to recede.

 

“You're wrong there, I do value my own life, but I also realize that it's a fleeting thing. What is eighty or ninety years to history? Hell what is it to you?” He quirked an eyebrow at me inquisitively and I laughed as I saw my own trick used against me. Smiling ruefully I continued, “In the passage of time I am nothing more than a fly on the pages of a history book. A human has limited options in the way they live their lives. We either fight to make a mark in history or we live for the enjoyment of living. Most of us split the difference and have families that we believe will carry on some trivial knowledge, teaching or endeavor we judge to be our legacy.”

 

He thought about it for so long, staring not so much at me as through me, that I considered leaving him there and finding my bed, “What is your legacy?” I laughed a truly jovial laugh.

 

“My Gran would have said it was to protect the natural balance of things. To carry on the family mission or some such, but personally I doubt that I'll have children to remember me by, so I'll leave that to nieces and nephews. Honestly, I don't find the world even remembering my unremarkable passage through it.”

 

“If you do not believe others will head your words or wonder about your life, why do you keep a written account of it?” What is this? Yokai twenty questions? Awe what the hell; at least he's not being an ass.

 

“Before I came here I kept it to track of my thoughts and impressions of things, incase I misinterpreted facts because of an emotional mistake. I continue to keep it so that I don't go crazy from the aberration that has become my life. If I write these preposterous events down they aren't as illogical and I can accept them…” I trailed off with a soft chuckle as I looked at my hands, “I'm not explaining myself very well.”

 

Again there was protracted silence and this time I gathered my book and stood, meaning to leave the inquisitive yokai to his thoughts. “The fire light suits you, ningen.” This time I laughed at the incongruous compliment as I looked down at him. What's your game now?

 

“I don't understand why you would say such a thing. I distrust such profligate and satirical words from anyone, Sesshomaru-sama. They are often false and more often meaningless, and from you they are…” I struggled to find a word for the disconcerting sensation fluttering in my breast, “incongruous, but I thank you nonetheless, and wish you a good evening.” What an odd, irregular and random creature. I let a small smile cross my lips as I walked to the door, but tonight wasn't bad.

 

“Yoi yume o.” his bizarre phrase caused me to pause a moment at the threshold, but hearing no further comments I left him. Sweet dreams, to you too, Sesshomaru-sama.

 

I wasn't really surprised when he was gone the next morning. Jaken was heartbroken that he was abandoned so soon after our arrival at the winter refuge and Rin spent the whole day alternating between reassuring the toad, and haranguing him. I retreated from the hullabaloo in order to explore our surroundings as Rin began singing, `The Song that Never Ends' at top volume and Jaken screeched in pain, That's my cue, exit stage left.

 

My first action of the day was to exercise my solitary katas in the guardhouse, and then I moved on to servant's wing of the castle. Rin found me just after dark in the abandoned laundry mixing scented oils for soap. Studiously watching beeswax and tallow melt together in a large vat. “There you are, Donella-sama!” She cried cheerfully as she bounded into the room. “Rin has been looking all over for you!”

 

I flashed her a happy smile before turning back to my work, “And now Rin has found me.” I responded mildly.

 

“Did you make the soup Rin found in the kitchen, Donella-sama?” I nodded as I carefully poured the lye and water mixture into the melted tallow and beeswax. “It was delicious Donella-sama! What are you doing now?” She asked eagerly looking over my shoulder at the yellow goop I was stirring.

 

“I am making soap, Rin-chan. Is there any particular smell you want for yours?” She giggled happily as she danced away from the simmering pot.

 

“Sakura Blossoms, Donella-sama!” I laughed at the obvious answer.

 

“I will make that one of your Yule gifts then, Hotaru.” I replied cheerily and she burst into exuberant laughter. I felt Sesshomaru's aura close and looked up to see his faint silhouette in the courtyard. He's back sooner than I expected.

 

“That's your holiday where the little boy was born in t he stable so that the fat man gives good children presents right?” I laughed merrily as she drew me back to the conversation and way from my musings. Well how else could a child born to Shinto interpret it? No matter how many times I explain that the stories are separate, she won't believe me.

 

“Sure, hon, that's it in a nutshell.” I answered her distractedly as I pulled the vat from the fire, added the scented oils and deftly poured the rapidly cooling soap into the blocky bamboo molds. Setting the container aside to soak, I turned to Rin.

 

“Is there any of that soup left?” I asked eagerly rubbing my hands together as I slid the door to the courtyard open.

 

The girl giggled, “If Jaken-sama hasn't eaten it all.”

 

I laughed at that and paused to ask her, “Hey, why don't we tell tonight's story in the common room so that Jaken can listen too?” She gave an eager nod of assent and then covered her mouth in mirthful laughter.

 

“And Sesshomaru-sama too!” she sniggered.

 

“Well that's up to him, silly goose. Hey!” I cried as she gave me a hard shove and yelled, “Tag, your it!” Before racing towards the castle.

 

I took off on her heels. Though I had had slightly longer legs, the child was quick and I had to work to gain on her. I had my hand out and was reaching for her kimono sleeve when I slammed into a familiar piece of armor. I growled in frustration as I looked up at the Inu-Daiyoukai. He stared down at me and ours eyes met as I continued to lean against him, and then a wicked thought occurred. Slapping the inflexible breastplate I cried, “You're it, no tag backs!” As I bounded a few feet towards the door.

 

“Rin.” The cool voice gave me pause, Oh no you don't! You will not punish her for my `insolence' you overgrown, over inflated Pomeranian! I thought as I made to storm back to him and intercede.

 

But to my utter shock and Rin's giddy delight, he deliberately laid his hand on her shoulder and said haltingly; “You are now it, no tag backs.” I watched the scene in stunned bemusement for only a moment as the anger evaporated. Then, the little imp grinned fiendishly at me as she charged forward. I let out a short scream of mock terror before pelting for the safety of the castle, and doors I could shut ahead of my petite pursuer.

 

That night, replete with vegetable soup we sat near the blazing hearth in the common room. Rin was cuddled up next to me, Jaken sat glowering into the fire and Sesshomaru loomed somewhere behind me in the shadows. I smiled at the absurd sense of normalcy that the setting provided me as I began my tale.

 

“Now, as you know, Danu is the mother of all the Tuatha De Danann and I've told you of the Great War in Heaven. Yet I am not ready to tell you the tale of the sons of Mil Espaine, who defeated the Tuatha De Danann in the battle that began that loathsome campaign. For to hear that sad and damning tale you must first hear the story of the Forging of the Saber of Beatha and the cost of it's formation. It is a tale that revolves around Danu's three granddaughters: Banbha, Eriu and Fodla, who gave their names to Eireann, and their husbands Mac Cuill, Mac Cecht, and Mac Greine, sons of the Daghda, and the last kings of the Tuatha De Danann.” I had to fight to keep a grim from my lips as Sesshomaru drifted towards the group, like a moth to the flame. I focused my attention instead on Rin as he gracefully melted to the floor at my side and I continued the tale.

 

“The First Daghda was named such by his mother Danu, and he led the Tuatha De Danann consummately for over two thousand years, before he was slain in battle and sent to Tir-na-n-Og to rest. In his honor all other high kings of the Tuatha De Danann where called The Daghda and where elected from the children of Danu every seven hundred years.

 

“Now the Aes sidhi were governed by Danu's first daughter Ernmas and the Daoine sidhe where governed by a comity of themselves. The last Daghda of the time was elected from the Daoine. This choice, though made by all the Tuatha De Danann, angered the Aes sidhi for they did not believe the logical and distant Daoine could rule even handedly over their fellows, with whom they so rarely shared hospitality. The Aes' anger and resentment threatened to drive them to war with their brothers. Bearach, for that was the name of the young Daghda; cried out his alarm and dejection to Danu and begged her to wake from the heart of the world and grant him guidance to avoid such an upset in the balance.

 

“The Great Mother, unable to deny the anguish in her child's call, woke and knowing everything instantly, she counseled Bearach thus, `Despair weakens you needlessly my child. You bear in your veins the blood of my most clever children and most trusted protectors. As Daghda you must defend the unity of these fractious clans. Ernmas has three eligible daughters, and you have three strong and cunning sons, propose a marriage to my daughter and you may yet end this hostility.'

 

“But the goddess, in her great wisdom and foresight, saw more than she told Bearach. Going quickly to her daughter she said, `Ernmas, the Daghda Bearach shall come to you on the morrow with a contract of marriage for your three daughters, eldest to youngest, for his three sons of the same. However, he is unaware that you have six such maidens. Instead of kind and gentle Eriu, Banba and Fodla, send the younger Badb, Macha and Morrigan to his home. Tell him that they will only marry if your daughters can be defeated by each son in battle, using a sword that produces no wounds. When they have accomplished this task, grant each man permission to wed Eriu, Banba and Fodla.'

 

“Ernmas was confused by her mothers words, but heeded them nonetheless. When Bearach's contract came she sent to him Badb, Macha and Morrigan, who where naught but girls far from their maiden cycles. When they arrived, Bearach was confused by the children dressed as brides presented to him. He was even more shocked by the mother's insistence that his sons not only fight the girls, but with a sword which would leave no wound.

 

“He sought out the aid of Goibhniu, the smith of the Tuatha De Danann, to see if such a blade could be crafted. The smith told the young ruler that indeed such a weapon could be forged, but it would take all the skills of the Na tri dee Dana and a great sacrifice from each of his sons. Bearach declared that any sacrifice was merited if it kept peace among the clans and so Goibhniu called forth his brothers Creidhne, and Luchtaine. Together they formed the Na tri dee Dana and began to forge the Saber of Beatha.

 

“Meanwhile, Bearach's sons, affronted that Ernmas would insist they wed children, ventured to the Aes sidhi's stronghold to deny the contract in full. Yet when the lads arrived, Ernmas was not at home and they where greeted by her eldest daughters instead. Mac Cuill, Mac Cecht, and Mac Greine where enamored with the beauty of the triumvir and outraged that Ernmas would send tots to their father's house when the beauties before them where obviously what the treaty had mandated.

 

“Ever gentle and considerate, the daughters soothed the lads and begged them not to exact retribution against their mother for her fallacy. The women counseled the men instead to do whatever was asked of them in order to seal the contract, for the sisters where the true prize of this sport.

 

“So the men returned to their father's home and spoke to no one of their journey and the Na tri dee Dana continued their work. At the Seventh hour, on seventh day, of the third month in the year of the Ash, the Na tri dee Dana called Bearach and his sons forth to complete the blade. It was Luchtaine the Wright, who spoke of the sacrifice, `For the saber to take no life, it must be contrary to its nature and give life instead. Yet forged metal and magical crafting can not give what it has not received, all those who wish to wield this blade must first grant it that which it does not have.' Knowing the blade would be tempered in their own blood; the brothers immediately stepped forward as one, and accepted the bargain. Creidhne of the Blades drew the glowing sword from the forge's embers and struck. Bearach, realizing then that his sons meant to give their lives for his fool's covenant, threw himself upon the weapon as it made its murderous arch.”

 

Rin's hand held my kimono in a death's grip as I paused in my tale and her earnest face was a mask of anticipated horror. I felt Sesshomaru's intense gaze boring into the side of my face. I gave Rin a reassuring hug as I continued. “The sword was thirsty from its forging and Bearach's blood would not satisfy its appetite as it continued through the willing brothers and consumed all four lives in one sweep. Yet when the blade had, had its fill, the magic of the Na tri dee Dana bound it fast in its satiation. Then, Creidhne once again wielded the weapon against the Daghda and is sons, slicing away the minions of death from their souls and drawing them from the border of Tir-na-n-Og into this world again.

 

“The Na tri dee Dana declared the blade the Saber of Beatha, and cautioned that though it was bathed in Sidhe blood, and could conquer death for all, it should never be drawn against a mortal life. For having tasted the blood of one, it would not be satisfied again with the other.

 

“On the morrow each brother in turn wielded the sword against a daughter of Ernmas and though the sisters fought valiantly, the brothers where able to defeat them. In so doing they won their wives and peace between their houses. The Saber of Beatha endured, to become a powerful tool in the hands of their descendant Donella de Daoine. For though there were many bloody conflicts between the clans ever after, no souls were sent to Tir-na-n-Og or the abyss because of them. And lest you over look the roles of Badb, Macha and Morrigan in this tale; know this: their defeat at the hands of the brothers caused them to swear a vow that they would never be conquered in battle again. Together they became the fiercest warriors in all of Irish history and to this day, mortal men call out their names for strength and aid before combat.”

 

Rin gave me a sleepy smile at the end of my tale, “Donella-sama did the brothers feel funny in their stomachs when they came alive again?” I frowned thoughtfully at the girl.

 

“I don't know Rin-chan, it was a very long time ago, why do you ask?” I inquired as I lifted her into my arms and began laboriously carrying her to her room. Kid needs to cut back on the pocky, I thought uncomfortably.

 

“Well when Sesshomaru-sama saved Rin with the Tenseiga, she felt funny in her stomach for a few days.” She responded fuzzily as I as I trudged down the hall. I laughed.

 

“Well I'm sure that it was a scary time for Rin. Anxiety always makes me feel funny in my stomach, but I'm glad you are here now, Hotaru who loves Sakura blossoms.” I gave her a gentle hug as I laid her on her futon. “Now sleep tight and sweet dreams, little firefly.” I murmured as I kissed her on her forehead and stood to leave.

 

“Donella-sama?” She called sleepily from the darkness.

 

“Yes, Rin?” I replied turning to face her voice in the gloom.

 

“Rin is very happy you stayed with us and won't ever leave. Sesshomaru-sama needed a grown-up friend.” She mumbled drowsily.

 

“Silly Rin-chan, Sesshomaru-sama has Jaken for a grown-up friend, he doesn't need me at all. No go to sleep.” But as I turned to leave I could help but catch her “Nuh-uh.” of denial, though if it was about her master, or going to sleep. I wouldn't know were to guess.

 

Back in the common room Jaken was talking adamantly to his lord. As quickly and unobtrusively as I could, I moved across the room and retrieved my shawl and journal. Maybe I'll stop by the kitchen and make a pot of tea before I go to my room and finish the last two poems. I hope it's not to cold in that laundry for that soap to set, maybe I should check on it. I see if there are enough cherry blossoms to produce an oil infusion for Rin's present… Attempting quiet discretion, I crept back towards the door as Jaken made his less than inveigle observations. “But if he is hiding it that guardedly, my lord, how will we ever get near enough to strike?”

 

“Baka, Jaken do you doubt me?” Sesshomaru asked with glacial calm as Jaken began backpedaling at an Olympic rate.

 

“N-n-n-no my lord I have utmost confidence in your skill, Sesshomaru-sama…” Maybe I can make a cute little flower or heart shaped mold for it.

 

“Do you know anything of this, ningen?” Sesshomaru's address stopped my progress, jumbled thoughts, and Jaken's protestations as I held the hall door open.

 

“I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.” I replied, absentmindedly turning to face the duo at the fire.

 

“Do you know of the place Byakuya has secreted Naraku's heart?” Though it retained it's usual arctic calm I sensed a dangerously low warning in his voice, Suspicious, mistrustful bastard.

 

I ground my teeth in frustration, “No, Sesshomaru-sama.”

 

“You are certain, ningen?” Again that thinly veiled threat.

 

I defiantly raised my eyes to meet his as I said with all the hurt and anger boiling inside me, “Yes, Sesshomaru-sama.” Before escaping through the door. What the hell is he fishing for? If I knew anything I'd tell him, but he would never believe that. Always has to take the hard road, always has to be distrustful and detached. Like a dog that's been kicked too often, he won't trust anything. The thought made my fleeing footsteps slow in their mechanical mission of escape. Could that be it? I laughed at my own psychobabble, Yes, it's more romantic to think he was an abused, unloved lonely child. It's more forgivable than being an intentional jerk. It was a long time before I slept that night as angry, injured accusations rolled through my mind. I can be angry for Wendy, but he's envious of Peter Pan.

 

 

Author's Notes:
My goodness all the reviews thank you everyone.

Yoi yume o: Sweet Dreams

Douchuugi and Uchikake are untied outer garments like coats..,

kakeshita kimono is what a traditional bride would wear.

 

 

Author's Notes: Wow so many people to thank for this chapter. To all those who usually review and didn't get a chance to Arvael, InuDstories, Black Angel of Envy I know you're still reading so thanks! (I'm sure I've missed some people so I'll send a general shout out to the silent masses and thanks for reading.)

 

Tootsiepop254: We shall start the Irish/Japanese Behavioral Boot Camp (IJBBC) and take over the world right after I recover from the Irish part, also advanced thanks for the card. ^ ^

 

Feathergriffin:Thanks so much for all the encouragement; your reviews always make the pain worth it.

 

Tsubasa Kya:Thank you for the detailed break down and the advice.

 

Wandering Hitokiri:Thanks so much for the enthusiasm it really keeps me going.

 

The Painted Lady: You made me blush, I'm just really glad you like both my stories and thanks so much for all the kind words!

 

HikoCassidy, Moonprincess, and FaintlyAlarming:Yay, thanks so much!

 

Inusrosebudforlife: Thanks for telling me that story it was sweet! And sorry for the Japanese history lesson, I'm too much of an academic for my own good. *blush*