InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Demons Within Us ❯ Guardian Angel ( Chapter 22 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Kagome bit her lower lip as she glanced around the growing crowd. It was well after two o'clock on a gorgeous Saturday afternoon and Guardian, the name the children finally agreed to call their band, had been playing steady for the better part of the hour.

Ayame and Hojo went all out for this event. The outdoor stage at Lakeshore Park had been booked and various media were contacted to let the public know of the charity concert. Apparently it worked, since over two thousand had showed up and more were already coming to idle around the blocked off stage to watch as the children played. It was now just a matter of waiting for a certain group of people to show to make this day complete.

Kagome let out a slow breath and clutched the terrible twist in her stomach as she nervously searched the sea of faces.

Sango and Miroku hadn't shown up yet, but that was expected. Miroku was gracious enough to call a while ago to let her know they had slept in, but would be there around two. Kouga was wonderful enough to show up early to help with the set up and of course be with Ayame. Which left only one person to make this day inevitable, the one person who would tell her if Kohaku was really Sango's brother.

“Kagome?”

The ebony haired woman turned quickly around to see Kaede come up to her.

“Has Bankotsu called?” The old woman asked.

Kagome nodded as she unconsciously pinched at the dull ache forming behind her eyes with her thumb and forefinger. She was overtired, not having gone to bed until after dawn and even then her sleep was light as she worried about today's outcome. It was by choice that she dealt with last night on her own, having everyone believe she didn't arrive back from Tokyo until early in the morning. In that circumstance she needed to be alone for too many would have drowned her mourning in their need to console her. She couldn't fully confide in anyone about Kohaku either. Too much was at risk, especially since the evidence she was waiting for could go either way. Her strength was being tried in more ways than one, but it was inconceivable for her to even think to walk away from it all.

She let her hand drop and sighed. “Yeah. He said he'd be here in a few minutes.”

“Are you all right, child?”

Kagome shook her head and lifted her worried eyes to the elder woman. “I don't know.” She turned to look over her shoulder towards the crowd once more. “I don't know if I did the right thing.”

“Then you do not see it as I see it, Kagome.” Kaede smiled softly as she regarded the girl. “What is meant to be will be. Things have a habit of occurring whether we give it permission or not.”

“I know.” Kagome sighed once again and looked wearily over at Kaede. “But I hate not knowing for sure. I know Bank couldn't have been here before the set up, and I'm rather thankful that Sango is late. But still, this isn't giving me much time to prepare them if Kohaku is who he may be. I couldn't tell them and get their hopes up only for them to find out they aren't family. They've been through enough as it is. I just wish I knew what to do to make it right.”

Kaede nodded. “Yes, the possibilities of their meeting could go either way. But if it weren't for you, they may never have met at all. And if you had not made such an impact on your friend Sango, you would not know of her possible attachment to Kohaku. Indeed, had you not known, imagine how more awkward this situation would be if they should be siblings. Consider it a blessing to have that knowledge, and for yourself to be prepared once you know for sure.”

“That's just it.” Kagome scanned the crowd once more. “I'd like to know before Sango comes. There are too many variables of what can happen, and only a few of them come out good.”

“Then that is when you let life take over.”

Kagome's shoulders slumped in dejection as she began to protest. “Kaede….”

“Kagome, you know for a fact that no one can control the path our choices make, we can only hope to divert it by choosing wisely.”

Kagome nodded sadly. “I just hope I made the right decision.” She looked over at the boy whose life may change drastically within the next hour as he laughed with his friends during their break. “For both of them.”

Kaede's grey eye drifted over to Kohaku as he playfully shoved Shippou onto the stage to begin their next set. “Then have faith. Let it be as you would want it. You will know what to do once the situation arrives. Your heart will lead you right, should you listen. And Kohaku will endure. No matter what happens, he still has this family.”

Kagome nodded, although despondently, and looked over to the stage to watch the children laugh and joke with each other before they began to play. Kohaku's own laughter drifted lightly on the breeze towards her. It sounded so pure and uninhibited, just as he should be. Happy. That's everything he deserved.

She pulled her gaze back to Kaede and gave her a resolved smile, knowing now what she had to do. It was the only thing she could do. Slowly, she moved into the crowd and listened to the boy she loved like a brother as he played with his band. Only, he wasn't her brother, not the way he needed to be.

She cast her gaze down as she moved through the various people who cheered as Guardian played. Kohaku's voice resounded smoothly over the audience. It was so strong and so sure. He was nothing like the boy Sango described. True, he had his past that he feared, but he also had a future he anticipated. He knew what he wanted and he went for it. He made sure to let nothing stand in his way, and he did it with more ease and humility than any she had known. He was an amazing kid but he would be the last to think so.

Her deep blue eyes drifted up to glimpse through the moving bodies at the teenager who stood on the stage. The happy and content look on his face automatically drew a soft smile to her lips before the sad realization reached her heart.

He wasn't a child anymore. He was around eighteen by now, but for some reason she could never forget that shy, freckled child that stumbled into her life so many years ago. And now there he stood on his own. His dark brown hair feathered lightly above his shoulders and she was glad to see he forgo the dark make up today, though he was dressed entirely in black. He looked so handsome and so confident standing on that stage, making him beam in pride for what they had accomplished. Something she knew the girls in the crowd noticed as well since she heard a few call to him to get his attention as they struggled to get to the edge of the stage, bumping her in the process.

Kagome watched them from the corner of her eye as they passed by her. They could never know who he is or what he went through. She let her eyes drift to the front. Even he didn't know.

Kohaku was a whole new person than what he was when he first came to the orphanage. Though his past had yet to be determined, and he did still have bouts of panic attacks over things that lay dormant in his mind, he persevered to overcome his insecurities to make him into the man before her. Could he have done that had he known what his past might have been? Could he remain the wunderkind that he is if he found out? Could he carry the burden of the truth for the rest of his life? Could anyone live a normal life having that over their heads?

She turned her back and began to walk away from the stage and away from him. She didn't know the answers to any of those fears, but she also knew she couldn't protect him from himself. She would do no good to him if she kept him in the dark for the rest of his life. But she would keep him from the pain for as long as she was able. Until she found out the truth, only she would carry this burden. And if it comes to the fact that he was whom she thought….

She glanced over her shoulder to look at Kohaku for a long moment before she walked on. He deserved to know his life, he deserved to have that gap filled, but if he could not carry the burden of it all….

Her head rose slightly with serene resolution. If he could not carry his weight, then she would carry him.

Kagome continued to move silently through the crowd, searching for the edge of the mass. She was shocked she was able to hear the sound of her name over the music and looked up to see Hojo waving at her from across the grassy field where the throng of people had thinned out. Walking more quickly in his direction, she was relieved to see he was standing next to Bankotsu.

Smiling widely, Kagome finally manoeuvred her way out of the crowd to meet them.

“Bank!” She cried as she ran over to him, jumped into his arms and hugged him hard. “Oh, I've missed you!”

“Hey, Kagome, baby.” The black haired man chuckled and squeezed her hard, nuzzling his nose into her soft raven locks. “Mmm. You still smell so sweet.” He set her down and looked at her lovingly with fathomless blue-grey eyes. “Every time I see you, you take my breath away. How many times do I wish I can just keep you?”

Kagome laughed and swatted his broad chest. “If Jak heard that you'd be sleeping on the couch for sure!”

“Believe me, that would only be punishing me.” A low feminine voice said behind her.

Kagome turned and cried out in happiness. “Jakotsu!” She ran into the slender man's arms. “I thought you were still in Paris!”

“The exhibit ended Thursday, so I hopped a plane home.” The dark eyed man smiled and hugged her warmly. He quickly let her go and circled his arm around Kagome's waist affectionately while he looked over at his lover scrutinizing. “I had to make sure Bank was behaving himself.”

“Oh come on.” Kagome smiled at the exuberant brunette beside her. “You know exactly what he does when you're away.”

Jakotsu lifted a brow wearily. “Yes, on the computer playing that damn game. You swear if it wasn't for work that man would never see the light of day again.”

Bankotsu rolled his eyes and pulled his wife away from Kagome. “You know, I'm right here….”

Jakotsu leaned lovingly up against him. “I know you are, dear.” He looked over at Kagome as a wide grin grew on his face. “You have to see this darling little number I got for him in Paris! It's black with sexy little samurais….”

“Jak, honey? Shut up.” Bank began to flush. Everyone laughed at his expense before the investigator shook his head. “Anyways, `Jo said you needed me to check out something for you.”

Kagome quickly sobered. “Yes, about Chihaya Kohaku. Did you find out anything?”

Bankotsu nodded. He lifted a yellow envelope from his back pocket and handed it to her. “This was all I could find, and it's not very much. These records were under confidential and I had to pull in a lot of favours to get this for you. Seems whoever this kid was he was into heavy crime, but has long been dead for a number of years. I'm not sure what info you needed of him, but that's all I could get in such a short amount of time.”

Kagome gripped the envelope hard and stared down at it. “I understand. Thank you all the same for getting what you could.” She glanced up to capture Bankotsu's eyes. “I'm so happy you could even get this for me.”

Bank shrugged as he wrapped his arm around his wife's waist. “Hey, lil' angel, there's nothing I wouldn't do for you.” He reached over and tapped Kagome's nose. “I only wish I could do more.”

Her warm blue eyes looked up in soft adoration for the man before her. Very few knew that Bankotsu was the young police officer that found her in the ruins of her Shrine. He rescued her moments from death and stayed with her at the hospital as she recovered. He became like a protector to her, and she in turn had become his little angel. Or so he said. He saved her life, and yet she could never fathom what she gave him in return to make him love her like an older brother.

“You have given me more than I can ever hope for, and someday I'll return the favour.” She said as she hugged the envelope closer to her appreciatively. “You don't know how much this means to me.”

Bank smiled and reached out to give her a tight hug. “I know what it means, Kag. And if it will help you help another then I'm be proud to be apart of it. That's all the reward I need.”

Kagome smiled softly as she hugged him back with loving affection. Timidly, she let out an anxious breath and pulled away to look down at the envelope in her hands. She shut her eyes briefly before opening them with silent care and lifted the tab to pull out the information.

Her eyes darted over the pages, taking in bits and pieces of information that was once the boy called Chihaya Kohaku. The last thing she pulled out was a small photo tucked in the corner. Her breath left her as she looked up, and her body filled with relief and dread at what she saw.

Hojo moved quietly beside her. “Kagome? Is it…?”

“No.” She whispered and turned to run into the crowd towards the stage.

-+-

InuYasha dragged his long fingers through his tangled hair as he sat indecisively on his rumbling Tessaiga.

`What the fuck am I so nervous about? She's just a girl.' He lifted his golden eyes to dart around the park from the lot he was sitting in. He inwardly groaned at seeing a large crowd of people surround a small black stage on which the kids from the orphanage played. Kagome wasn't anywhere in sight and he couldn't tell whether he was glad or annoyed about the fact.

Leaning heavily against the black leather seat of his Harley, he let his eyes drop to the gravel lot beneath him. Maybe this was a bad idea. It wasn't like he owed her anything by being here.

He felt his chest grow cold. No. That was a lie. He owed her. He owed her big for everything he had done to her up to this point. And he owed himself the chance to see her for what she really was.

He lifted his tired eyes up to the lush green of the park and stared blindly at the people. Whether or not he could make it up to her was beyond him. All he knew was that he needed to be here, because he needed to see her. After all, it's not everyday you are given sight.

Flashback

“Tell me what you know.” InuYasha flared heatedly down at his friend.

Sango stepped back from him and gave him an angry look. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Bullshit!” He snarled as the gold in his eyes darkened. “You know exactly what I'm talking about!”

“InuYasha?” Miroku stepped sleepily from the bedroom, rubbing his heavy eyes. “What's going on? What time is it?”

InuYasha glanced at his guitarist before looking away in disgust. “Fuck sakes, Miro, put on some goddamned pants.”

The dark haired man yawned and ducked back into the room without a care of his naked form.

Sango shook her head in annoyance and pushed past him. “Go home, InuYasha. Whatever the fuck you want to know can wait until tomorrow.”

InuYasha glowered at her nightshirt clad back as she headed to her bedroom before he followed after her. He flicked on the bedroom light and crossed his arms, feeling hardly any guilt as he watched his two friends flinch at the brightness as they crawled back into bed.

“This can't wait.” He frowned.

Sango groaned into her pillow. “Why?”

InuYasha opened and closed his mouth before he snorted. “Because… just because.”

“That argument should hold up in court.” Miroku mumbled. “Turn off the light before you go, Yash.”

The silver haired man growled and scraped a chair from the side desk to straddle between his tense legs. He sat for a few moments in thought before he let out a long drawn out sigh.

“She had lotus blossoms.” He murmured.

“Who did?” Miroku stated dumbly as he began to drift off to sleep.

“Kagome.”

Sango opened a cinnamon eye wearily. “When?”

“Tonight. At the Southern Block.”

Two pairs of eyes opened wide and looked over at the singer.

“What the fuck were you doing at the Southern Block?” Sango fumed. “Don't you know how dangerous that place is?”

Miroku was silent for a few moments before he cast his gaze at the ceiling. “Just where did you see Kagome, InuYasha?”

Sango automatically bit her lower lip and she glanced back at her boyfriend as the situation finally dawned on her. She cast her gaze back at her best friend and took in his exhausted expression as he dropped his amber eyes to the floor.

“I was meeting Hiten at the Seventh Hell, and before you rant about why I was meeting him, let me fucking finish.” His cold eyes glared hard at Sango.

Her mouth automatically shut.

“Continue.” Miroku yawned and sat up, making sure to keep himself covered by the blankets.

InuYasha shrugged. “I was heading off the shrine when I saw her. She seemed to know the place. Well, she walked through it like she knew where she was going anyways. She looked… out of it.” Images of sad eyes triggered small jolts of pain in his chest and he mentally pushed them away.

Sango breathed in slowly before she spoke. “Did she say anything to you?”

InuYasha shook his head. “She didn't know I was there.”

“So you spied on her?” Sango frowned.

Golden eyes shot up in defence. “Look, it wasn't like I knew she was just going to show up at five in the fucking morning in a place she had no goddamned right to be in. Fuck! Last thing I was going to do was call her on it. It wasn't any of my business anyways.”

“And yet here you are asking about it.” Miroku slumped back down on the bed. “Do yourself a favour, Yash, and forget you saw anything. What she did we have no reason to worry about. I'm assuming she did what she needed and is at home safe and sound.”

“Damn it!” InuYasha shot up from the chair and thrust it back to the wall. “Why are you both okay with this? What are you keeping from me?”

Sango flared in an exhausted temper as she shot up from her bed and pointed furiously at him. “Nothing! We haven't kept a damn thing about Kagome from you! You did, you son of a bitch! And you have no right to come barging in here at god-awful hours in the morning demanding we tell you anything! If you want to know so bad, ask her your fucking self!”

InuYasha stepped back, wanting nothing more than to scream his frustrations out at his friends, but his anger quickly drained as a tired helplessness took over. “I can't.”

“And why the hell not?” Sango wiped her tired brow and flumped back down on her bed.

“Because then she'll know what I saw.” He rubbed his upper arm distractedly and looked down. “I don't think she wanted anyone around to see her.”

Miroku lifted his head and turned his body to finally look upon his friend. “InuYasha… just what did you see?”

InuYasha darted his honey eyes up at the man before he let them drop to the floor. “I watched her put three lotus blossoms at the foot of the shrine tree.”

“And?” Sango lifted a brow wearily.

“The lotus blossom is the symbol of the spiritual in Buddhist religion. It reveals the path of our lives, where we raise out of our worldly existence to transcend into purity.” Miroku stated simply before looking at InuYasha. “I'm surprised you remembered that.”

“Keh.” InuYasha shrugged. “The monk you lived with may have been a drunk and a pervert, but when he was sober, he was interesting.”

Miroku smirked at the memory but Sango frowned in confusion. “So she put some flowers by a tree. Why would you think she'd be upset that you were there?”

“Because.” InuYasha's lips turned down in discomfort. “I saw… that she was crying… and that she was mourning…. I couldn't just walk up to her and ask her what the fuck she was doing. It wasn't my place.”

Sango lifted her eyes up at her friend before she looked over at Miroku. She tilted her head as if to ask to fill InuYasha in about Kagome but Miroku slowly shook his head. Instead, he looked back at their long time friend as if waiting for him to continue and it wasn't long before InuYasha spoke.

“You came to my apartment and told me she wasn't as innocent as I thought. You told me she wasn't without pain.” Golden eyes filled with uncertain emotions lifted to look at the pair on the bed. “That was her home, wasn't it? She lost her family in that bomb, didn't she?”

Sango's eyes drifted to the floor and Miroku looked immediately away. That was answer enough.

InuYasha slowly shook his head with a slight frown on his lips. “It must have been hard for her. Waking up one morning to find out your family was dead. She handled it pretty well considering she didn't end up fucked up like the rest of us.” He snorted. “She was lucky, really. At least she wasn't there.”

Sango and Miroku shot looks at each other before drifting their eyes at the man standing before them.

“InuYasha?” Sango began, not sure if she had the right to tell him. A soft hand squeezed her shoulder in reassurance. She glanced back to see Miroku nod once before she turned back to capture sun kissed eyes into her earthy brown. “Kagome wasn't so lucky as you think.”

Twin brows furrowed in confusion.

Sango sighed tentatively and looked down. “Kagome was in that house when the bomb hit. She was there when the fire burned her family alive. She was the only one who survived the Southern Block bombing.”

InuYasha felt like he took a blow to the face as he inadvertently stumbled back in shock. His back collided into the wall directly behind him before he slowly let himself slump to the floor. His hand came up to cover his mouth in an unconscious grip as he stared blankly ahead of him in disbelief for several minutes.

His hand eventually dropped and he shook his head dumbly. “Holy shit. No. No way. She couldn't have been there. It's impossible. No one lived through that.” He looked up at Sango in an attempt to see if she was lying. “That place is nothing but ash. There is no way she was there…. There is no way she came out of that and still look like that.”

Sango shifted off her bed and knelt down in front of the prone man. Her grey nightshirt stretched over her thighs as she rubbed his shin trying to comfort him. She wanted to tell him everything she knew, but her mouth remained shut. The scars that Kagome had were her own business. She had her reasons for keeping them hidden, and if Kagome wanted InuYasha to know, it would be her decision.

Instead, she breathed out an exhausted breath. “God only knows how Kagome got out of there, let alone survived. But she did. She was eventually placed in the orphanage where she works now. We don't know for sure all that she went through to get over what she'd been through, but she did.” She shrugged and looked at her friend apprehensively. “Can anything that made her heal be all that bad?”

InuYasha looked up uncertainly before he slowly shook his head irately at what she meant. “Keh, whatever it was it was a delusion. Nothing could ever make that pain go away.”

“Maybe not, but it helped her endure.” Miroku stated simply.

InuYasha snorted in denial. “Yeah, well, goes to show she can live in a world of make believe. No supernatural force can honestly make things better. But if it helps her forget all the power to her.”

Sango and Miroku exchanged glances before looking pitifully back at InuYasha.

He glared hard back at both of them. “What!” He blinked back in realization. “Oh for fuck sakes, don't tell me she got you convinced about her God crap?”

Miroku frowned and looked away angrily, but it was Sango that forced his attention. She was looking at him with a sad glint in her eyes as if she was disappointed in him. He searched her face for several moments before shifting his gaze away in discomfort.

“InuYasha?” Her soft voice touched his ears and he slowly looked back at her. “It's not like that.” A shy smile graced her lips as she gazed at the floor. “Kagome has never spoken of religion or God. She never did anything to make us believe she was motivated by another reason.” Sango sighed and looked up, though her eyes wouldn't meet his. “She was just… there.”

InuYasha looked doubtful. “She was just `there'?”

A dry chuckle left Miroku's lips as he sat still and quiet on the bed. His let his silver eyes drift over to meet gold. “Kagome does believe in something, InuYasha. She believes in others.” He leaned back against the headboard and sighed. “She thinks everyone is good, or can be, and she wants to bring that out in people. She listens and does whatever she can without any care for herself.” He shrugged. “She may not be into religion or whatever you think she is, but she's a saint.”

InuYasha let out a soft snort. “I don't know. The way you go on about her, you make her seem like she's an angel or some shit.”

“Maybe.” Miroku shrugged as he rested his hands behind his head and a small smile flitted on his lips. “I've heard that angels fall for many reasons. Maybe she really is one.”

InuYasha rolled his eyes and looked away in uneasiness. “Enough, Miro.”

“Seriously, man. She could be.”

“Kagome?” InuYasha lifted a brow. “An angel that fell from heaven to join a metal rock band?”

Miroku chuckled. “Well, maybe she knew Perdition would be something.” The humour slowly dimmed from his eyes as he lifted his gaze to InuYasha. “Or maybe she fell because it was the only way she could help us.”

InuYasha felt his gut clench hard in anxious dread. He tore his eyes away and glared hard at the side wall. “She isn't an angel, Miro.”

“Maybe not.” Sango sighed. “But whatever she is, or whatever she's gone through, she rose above it. And she helped me do the same.”

InuYasha lifted his eyes to look at her curiously as she spoke.

“She never forced us into anything, InuYasha. She just showed that there's something better to live for. Whether or not there is a heaven, or if she is from there,” she gave Miroku a wry glance before looking back at InuYasha, “she wants nothing more than to bring us to that place. She wants us to be happy.”

InuYasha frowned in confusion and looked to Miroku for explanation, but the man's eyes were shut as if listening in silent contemplation. The singer looked warily back at the woman kneeling beside him but she too looked like there was nothing more to say. Yet both looked undisturbed over the fact of what they were implying. Kagome helped them by doing what, listening and telling them there's more to life to live for? That was so cliché he could puke. It was bullshit. She did absolutely nothing.

He watched them for a few moments before he let his head fall back against the wall behind him in dawning comprehension.

But Kagome did do something he realized, something to make them feel differently. All this while she had been there for them. He had ignored the subtle changes, but now looking at them he could finally see. They looked at ease. Something he hasn't seen in them in such a long time that the effect looked foreign to him. Yet it looked… tranquil. And it suited them.

He lowered his eyes to the tiled floor. It was all because of her: a girl who survived when no one else had, a woman who healed wounds where he could never reach. He shut his eyes heavily. And she did it….

“How?” His voice was low and gruff.

Miroku let out a quick breath in an attempt of a laugh. “Does it matter?”

InuYasha opened his eyes only to have them be captured by vivid brown orbs that were once filled with remorse, hurt and resentment. Now, they were filled with hopeful anticipation and shy sadness. But Sango's eyes held only a touch of the emotion he had seen in another's. He blinked back the vision of blue heavens that opened up to everything within him… everything he did not want to let go.

He let in a tired breath and released it in resignation. No, it didn't matter how she helped them, because she did it without even knowing. She did it with no more than a look and her presence. She opened up for them in her own way, hiding nothing, and they went to her because they knew she was safe. But to him, she was dangerous.

A mellow voice broke him quickly from his thoughts.

“She's an amazing girl, InuYasha.” Miroku grinned slightly. “But I can understand why she frightens you.”

InuYasha was taken back. “She doesn't scare me.”

“No?” Miroku cast his humour filled eyes at the man. “Then what are you running from?”

InuYasha opened his mouth slightly before shutting it. “I'm not running from anything.” He finally said contritely. “What makes you think I am?”

Miroku shrugged. “I've just never known you to make a habit of pushing a beautiful girl away.”

“Keh.” InuYasha grunted. “As if. Me not wanting to fuck her doesn't mean I'm scared of the girl. She just isn't my type.”

“Oh please.” Sango rolled her eyes.

“What?” InuYasha shifted uncomfortably against the wall. “She's not.”

“InuYasha, even you can't be that stupid.” Sango stood and moved to the bed.

“What the fuck are you getting on with?” He glared at her as she tucked herself into the blankets.

Miroku shook his head as he unconsciously wrapped an arm around his girlfriend to hold her against him as they spooned. He held a hint of an annoyed grin on a corner of his lips as he glanced over at InuYasha. “The question is what exactly are you getting on with? We all know what you really mean to be saying is that you feel you're out of her league.” His grin turned into a wry smile. “And what we are trying to tell you is that Kagome is exactly what you need.”

InuYasha felt his face flush hot in resentful embarrassment. He quickly choked on a forced laugh. “Keh, yeah. The last thing I need is her. There is no way she could handle me.”

“She has so far.” Miroku lifted a brow suggestively.

InuYasha shut his mouth and turned away. “You guys don't know what you're talking about.”

Sango sighed as she nestled her head into her pillow and gazed at him on the floor. “We know that if you don't see what we see, then you're a moron. And if you don't make it a point to at least try to see her for what she really is, then you will be losing the best thing that could ever happen to you.”

Golden eyes slowly looked up to study the woman in wary confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I'm just saying that while you keep pushing her away, another is going to take her.” Sango yawned carelessly.

“Who?!” InuYasha's eyes darkened defensively as he sat up.

Miroku chuckled. “Fuck sakes, InuYasha. Not everyone is as daft as you are. She's smart, funny, beautiful and kind. You can't honestly think others don't want her, or aren't trying to get with her.”

“Keh.” He eased back slightly against the wall and looked contrary as he crossed his arms in defiance. “Let them. It's not like she's anything to me.”

“No?” Miroku yawned and shut his eyes. “So you can honestly say they deserve her? Think you can stand by as another gets to have it all?”

InuYasha ground his teeth but refused to answer. Of course no one was good enough for her, but it also meant that he wasn't. Still, could he honestly stand by as some pompous prep with less cock than he did balls take the fire and life out of her?

He lowered his head. He'd die inside if that happened. As much as he hated to admit it, the thought of anyone even looking at her sent sickening waves of hatred through his core. He'd be damned if anyone else got her and he'd fuck up anyone who tried.

But what could he ever offer to make him even worth a fraction of what she deserved?

“Kagome has seen nothing but your bad attitude, yet she has still stood by you.”

InuYasha lifted his head to gaze wearily at Sango. Her eyes were closed and she looked like she was already asleep, but her lips parted to murmur her point home.

“Maybe it's about time she saw you for who you want to be.”

InuYasha sat in silence before Miroku groaned.

“Turn off the light, Yash, and get some sleep. We'll talk in the morning.”

The singer looked up to see his two friends drift off to sleep before he stood and turned off the light to their bedroom.

“Yash?” Sango stated sleepily behind him. “Take the couch tonight. It's too late to drive home.”

Smirking, InuYasha stepped out into the dark warehouse. Lights from the overhead windows cast enough light for him to adjust his sight. Looking to the far wall across from him, he could see the new additions Sango bought last week. A small fridge and stove took up one corner, while two arm chairs and a sofa took up the other corner next to a large TV. He slowly headed over to the plush mahogany sofa and gazed down at a pillow and blanket folded neatly at one side. He could easily have headed home tonight, but for some reason, here felt like the better option.

Kicking off his shoes, he stripped his shirt and jeans off and flopped his tired body on the couch and got comfortable. Bunching the pillow up behind his head and kicking a bare leg out from the blanket, InuYasha looked up at the light of the dawn reflecting on the high, dark ceiling. His mind automatically sifted over the night's events and he grimaced over everything he had said and done to Kagome. But more specifically he felt sick of what he didn't do.

Kagome cried. But it wasn't the fact that she cried that bothered him. He'd seen countless women cry. Hell, he was most often than not the reason for their tears, but never once did they affect him. Not until now. And he felt helpless against it. Those tears were not his fault, yet he felt powerless against them. He felt… weak.

He shut his eyes hard and nuzzled his head deeper into the pillow as he tried to escape his thoughts but to no avail. All he could see behind his lids were brilliant blue eyes that held the weight of the world and he couldn't do a damn thing about it. He felt so pathetic hiding from her and just watched her as she mourned. He knew that memory would haunt him for the rest of his life.

After she left, he had driven by her home to make sure her car was in the driveway before he made his way to the warehouse. If anything, he needed to know she was safe. He needed her to be okay. He needed her….

Golden eyes opened a fraction as the realization of it all finally sunk in.

He needed her. He needed to see her smile, hear her laugh, smell her scent and feel her warmth, if only for a moment to know that she was real. Because no real woman could carry such pain and still live each day with as much grace and freedom as she did.

Even now his chest tightened at the sudden rush to call her or drive to the orphanage to make sure she was there, but he forced his body to sink further into the couch. What would be the reason to do such a thing? What the hell would he say to her? Especially after what he said to her tonight, how could he act like everything was normal?

He told her he could never be her friend. He just walked away as he always did when things got too hard. He'd been such an asshole to her. He fucked up with her time and time again. It was obvious that no matter what he did when it concerned Kagome, it was always the wrong thing. And yet, she was still there.

His eyes drifted up to the greying ceiling that was steadily growing brighter. Why did she still stay? He mentally shook his head. Why did she ever come to him in the first place? It would have been better had he never known her at all. But she was there, she was always there, and he fought so hard to push her away. He had finally come close to ridding himself of her perfect happiness, something that he craved and despised all at once. God, it would have been so much easier to let her go had he never known the truth about her.

He shut his eyes bitterly at all that he discovered tonight. Why did she have to be so real? How was it possible for her to have experienced more pain than any he had known yet she was still so far above him? How was it possible she faced such loss, yet was still so unmarked?

A soft breath left his chest as his body shuddered in exhausted defeat. How could he keep himself from her now? She was everything to him.

But what was he?

His mind began to drift in and out of coherent thought as he fought off sleep. He didn't even feel like he was himself anymore. He didn't feel like he was anyone….

His consciousness quickly slipped into darkness.

…Without her.

End Flashback

InuYasha reached down and turned the ignition off of his bike and clutched the keys hard into his hand before he swung his leg over his Harley and walked slowly in the direction of the park.

He deftly pocketed his keys as he shoved his hands hard into his jeans pockets, trying his damnedest to look natural. He cast his eyes around the wide park, taking in the numerous people and the sound of the band as they played.

He raised a brow slightly as he watched the kids play in the distance. They weren't that bad. If he actually gave a damn, he'd almost be impressed.

“Kagome!”

His eyes quickly shot in the direction of the sound of her name. Scanning quickly over the waning people before him, he could barely see that little fucker, Hojo, waving excitedly in the direction of the audience. Following the douche's gaze, his chest quaked at the raven-haired angel that smiled more brilliantly than the sun as she stepped from the crowd.

God, she was gorgeous. Her dark hair, penetrable blue eyes and pure aura just radiated perfection. She was sin itself. Evil in it's true definition. She was the source of his suffering, pain and destruction. She did things to him no righteous being would be allowed, for there was no way anything that could make a grown man want to commit murder be good. Especially when he saw the reason for his torment jump into the arms of another man.

InuYasha saw blinding red as Kagome hugged into a handsome man who dared to bury his nose in her hair. Blunt nails cut into his hands as he fought off a wave of nauseous fury. Could this be the man that Kouga was setting her up with? By the looks of things, she seemed happy about it.

He wheezed in a sharp breath, only then realizing he hasn't been breathing and his chest burned from the pressure. He twisted his eyes away from the ripping scene and was about to turn around before he heard her laugh.

“Jakotsu!”

Morbid curiosity pulled his eyes towards her and his body numbed in confusion. She was hugging another man now? And this one was holding her like they were a couple! His teeth clenched hard as the three men who surrounded her smiled and beamed in her presence as if all of this was normal. Just what the fuck was going on?

Miroku's words flashed inside his head and pounded his blood into a white-hot rage. How could he not know that others would want her? Of course he knew! But so many? He growled in fury. Fuck this! He was tired of fucking around. Who gave a shit if they wanted her? He'd be damned if he let them have her!

He stumbled forward in an attempt to reach her before any other men showed up before three teenage girls stopped him in his tracks.

“Oh my god!” One tall, slim girl breathed out in excitement. “Are you InuYasha?”

He looked down at her in confusion, not even recognizing his own name. He blinked a few times at the pretty young things in front of him before he nodded dumbly.

The girls giggled elatedly.

“Oh my god, you have to sign an autograph for me!” The slim girl squirmed closer to him while tugging on her friend to find her a pen.

InuYasha unconsciously looked up to find Kagome and his brows knitted together in confusion. Okay, now this was unexpected. The two men that had hugged her were now holding each other like…. His eyes opened in realization and he almost wanted to laugh in relief before a pen was shoved in his hand.

“Sign my chest?” The girl looked up at him slyly while she lifted the hem of her shirt to reveal a trim waist and a lacy pink bra.

InuYasha stumbled back inadvertently, or tried to anyways, but the other two girls had him flanked. He quickly looked around and saw he was trapped between all three.

Growling low in agitation at the situation he was thrown in, he knew he had to deal with this fast. The girls were making enough of a scene as it was and he didn't want any more attention than what he had already been given. Gripping the pen hard in annoyed resolution, he reached out and scribbled his signature on the slutty girl's side, though it looked more like chicken scratches than a name.

“There.” He shoved the pen back at her before he tried to move out of their huddle to rush over to Kagome. Now knowing that those men were not his competition, he wanted to make sure that no one else would dare try for his prize.

“Sign me, too!” The shorter of the teens burst in front of him and lifted her shirt.

He held in a harsh scream of anger as he kept himself from tripping over her. Grabbing the pen from the first girl, he deftly marked on the second teenager's stomach, not even wincing as he accidentally scratched her with the tip.

Glaring fiercely over at the last girl, he held up the pen like a knife. “You too?”

Staring at him wide eyed, the youngest of the girls quickly shook her head and slowly backed away.

Nodding in praise, he thrust the pen in her hand and ducked out of their circle to head over to the men huddling around Kagome. His pace slowed, however, as he moved closer towards her. She looked upset. What was wrong? And why weren't those jerks she was surrounded by making it right? Couldn't they see she was in pain? What the hell happened?

Suddenly her eyes looked up and captured his own and silence seemed to sweep over the park as they stopped still and stared at each other.

Fear, shock and wavering spirit resonated from those deep pools of emotion. She looked like she was sinking in it and begging to be saved. He was at a loss of what to do before she turned and ran into the crowd.

Without even hesitating, he darted after her and thrusted himself into the mass of people as music from the band erupted around them.

InuYasha felt like he was drowning. The sea of people before him swayed and pushed him that he soon felt lost in the chaos. Looking around him, he just barely made out Kagome's form as she moved forward. He called out to her, but his voice was lost in the tidal wave of cheers. Gritting his teeth, he pounded his body after her, desperate to reach her.

Hold it together, birds of a feather

Nothing but lies and crooked wings

I have the answer, spreading the cancer

You are the faith inside me

No, don't

Leave me to die here

Help me survive here

Alone,

Don't remember,

Remember

Kagome glanced back, her fearful eyes sweeping over the crowd as she pressed forward. He reached out for her, but she did not see him as she disappeared before him.

Put me to sleep, Evil Angel

Open your wings, Evil Angel

InuYasha yelled out in pain as he was pushed to the ground. Slowly lifting his body up, he stumbled forward while clutching his side. Cringing, he looked up and caught sight of waves of soft black hair that flowed like shadowed wings as a warm wind blew around them. Her blue eyes turned to him, but it seemed she looked right through him as she once again disappeared. He delved deeper in the mass, trying his damnedest to find her. She was like a mirage, yet he would not deny himself the hope he'd get to her.

I'm a believer

Nothing could be worse

All these imaginary friends

Hiding betrayal

Driving the nail

Hoping to find a saviour

No, don't

Leave me to die here

Help me survive here

Alone, don't

Surrender

No matter how far in he went, he could not see her. He thought he lost her and he felt the panic begin to rise. He stood still and slowly shut his eyes as he fought the wave of defeat that threatened to consume him. Reluctantly, he opened them again and his lips automatically separated as cerulean depths captured him. She was so close he could breathe in her sweet scent on the air. She was looking at him with a glint of sorrow yet she did not deny him, instead she turned as if beckoning him forward. His mouth parted to call her name, but the crowd once again swept her away. Gathering his last ounce of strength, he charged through the horde.

Put me to sleep, Evil Angel

Open your wings, Evil Angel

Fly over me, Evil Angel

Why can't I breathe, Evil Angel?

He felt like he was fighting for air as his body got knocked every which way, but she was always within his sight now, never leaving him behind. He grimaced in pain as he was elbowed in the side by mistake before looking up at Kagome with mild envy. She seemed to walk through the multitude with no effort while he felt like invisible hands were pulling him back.

Suddenly, the crowd broke away and he found himself standing there before her. She was facing him with her back to the stage and her eyes drifted up to look directly into his. He found himself silenced by the humble sadness that echoed in their depths. Without a word, she lifted her eyes up to the stage.

He slowly followed her gaze and his body flooded with heavy ice as he felt the world crash down upon him.

Put me to sleep, Evil Angel

His mouth parted in shock as dark cinnamon eyes glanced down at him in curiosity.

Open your wings, Evil Angel

InuYasha stepped back as his gaze shot to the woman before him.

Fly over me, Evil Angel

Her fathomless eyes told him everything as she watched over him in quiet expectation. In numbed denial, InuYasha lifted his eyes back up at the teenager on stage.

Why can't I breathe, Evil Angel?

It was impossible. He was dead! There was no way in hell he was alive! It couldn't be….

“Kohaku!”

With wide eyes, InuYasha turned to the voice beside him and felt his senses shut down.

Sango stared up at the stage in terrified shock as the last beat of the song ended.

A/N: Oh thank goodness! Another chapter done! *Wipes face wearily. The song is called Evil Angel, by Breaking Benjamin. I want to thank Wear Your Love Like Heaven for suggesting that song. It's been my saving grace for this portion of the story. You are a godsend, girl! She also wrote a one shot based on DWU and I think it's worth a read. ^_^.

Once again I really need to thank my Beta. Missy, you are the best beta a girl could have and I owe a lot to you.

I guess a small explanation of why I haven't updated in awhile. Well, the truth is that I decided I needed a break. Being at the office or lab all day then home until 2am working on the story became a bit much, especially since I was dealing with emotions and situations I had to relive before writing it down. It was a mental and spiritual drain that made it a physical drain. So I really spent the last month playing video games and working out and not letting me think at all. I was able to regroup myself and lost 5lb to boot! So here's hoping my little break didn't hinder the story and don't worry, I will finish this story. I want to see it through to the end namely because I need to feel an ending.

Well, it's late and it's about time I posted this sucker. Enjoy! And as always, live, love and laugh!

WDW