InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ You Are Not Alone ❯ A Boy's Will ( Chapter 11 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

The next couple chapters are going to be shorties, okay? Just some things to help get a little more deeper into the story.

I've made a songpick for this chappy: the song Sympathy by Goo Goo Dolls. A favorite of mine. You can listen to it or sing along to it or just read it from the lyrics I put up here. Enjoy!

Inuyasha's ears twitched as he heard the sound of running feet and the sound of something falling into the ground. He also detected the faint scent of tears. His eyes perked over Kikyo's head to see someone running away. He could see that it was Kagome.

Quickly, so he could go after her, he placed his hands on Kikyo's shoulders, pushing her away from him. He didn't even say anything; he only gave her an angry though hurt look as he ran past her and towards the direction at which he saw the girl run.

He stopped when he caught the aroma of fresh cookies. He looked down on the ground next to a tree and saw a plate of cookies that had been dropped to the ground. The plate didn't land too gracefully and a couple cookies fell off of it. He picked one up, examining it. It had his face on it, in a more childlike cartoon style. He knew that Kagome must've made them. He looked up, still holding the treat in his hands.

He did not look angry, shocked, curious, or confused. Only sad.

The boy stood at that spot for what seemed like a lonely eternity, feeling the cool autumn wind sweep his moonlight hair over his shoulders, as if it was trying to persuade him to run after the girl. His body began to plead as much as his heart, but he kept still, lost of what to say to her when he caught up. His sun-bathed eyes glowed with a solemn sadness, losing all knowledge of all else around them; they only recognized the trail of tears that continued fresh in front of them.

"What a coward."

Inuyasha's eyes hardened slightly as the words reached his ears. He didn't need to turn around to see who said it, though.

"With every problem she comes across, she only feels the need to cry, not doing anything about it. That girl only shows others how weak she really is. Pathetic." Kikyo said, crossing her arms, sighing with disappointment.

The boy's eyes hardened a bit more at her comment. She saw this as a success and kept going.

"She's nothing but a crybaby. She's too weak and too afraid to stand up for herself. But she keeps going on with such pitiful excuses, like 'I know I can try harder,' or 'I'm not so bad when you get to know me.' Absolutely pitiful. Almost sad, even. It was just like I had told her the first time: If she wants to make friends, she needs character."

Inuyasha's eyes twitched at that comment, a memory automatically triggered.

"So it was you who made her cry that day? At the practice grounds? Inuyasha asked quietly. Kikyo raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, that was me. I still don't understand why she got all upset, though; what I said was no lie. You can never blame someone for telling the truth, right?"

With that last statement, the girl turned around and walked away. Inuyasha didn't even bother to turn; he stayed in that very spot, thinking about what she had said even though he wanted to decide against it.

After a few moments of intense thought, Inuyasha closed his eyes with indecision as he let his legs carry him home.

Ignoring the questions of his brother, Inuyasha walked slowly to his room, the cookie still in his hands. He remained silent; his eyes still with no emotional activity. In entering his room, he slowly and quietly shut the door as he motioned over to his desk. He sat down and layed his head down, shielding it with his crossed arms. He closed his eyes, entranced in deep thought.

Stranger than your sympathy
And this is my apology
I killed myself from the inside out
And all my fears have pushed you out

'Kagome never seemed weak,' Inuyasha thought.

And I wished for things that I don't need
All I wanted...
And what I chase won't set me free
That's all I wanted...

'She's always so cheerful and energetic; I'm always so surprised when I see her cry...But could Kikyo be right? Could all of her crying mean a sign of weakness...?'

The boy thought about that for a minute. He felt that he should have cried the day his mother died. But for some reason, he didn't. Yes, of course he was greatly sad for such a great loss, but not just the action, but the idea of crying never really came to him. After all, his father and brother were just as emotionless as he was, despite their unmistakable grief from losing Izayoi.

And I get scared
But I'm not crawlin' on my knees, oh yeah
Everything's all wrong here
Everything's all wrong here
Where the hell did I think I was?

'Yeah...crying is supposed to be a weakness...right? It makes you vulnerable and completely open for any kind of offense; physical or mental. And that must've been the type of move that Kikyo made on Kagome....'

'But Kikyo said that Kagome said things like "I can try harder..." ' Inuyasha wondered. 'What was she trying so hard for? What in this cruel world would Kagome work so hard for...?'

And stranger than your sympathy
Take these things so I don't feel
I'm killing myself from the inside out
And now my head's been filled with doubt

~"Absolutely pitiful. Almost sad, even. It was just like I had told her the first time: If she wants to make friends, she needs character."~

We're taught to lead the life you choose
All I wanted...
And all your love's run out on you
All I wanted...

'...Make...friends? Is that why Kagome is always working so hard? So she could make friends...? I thought she had so many, since she's always such a good person....Then again, besides me, her brother, Sango, and that Kouga idiot who keeps trying to make a move on her, I haven't seen anyone else even speaking to Kagome...'

And you can't see
When all your dreams are comin' true
It's easy to forget, yeah
When you choke on the regrets, yeah
Who the hell did I think I was?

'Is that why she cries? Is that why she works so hard? She's...lonely?'

Inuyasha had no clue why Kagome would feel lonely. She had such a nice mother and a not-so-normal-but-still-acceptable brother, as well as his girlfriend who was like an older sister to her. How could she ever feel lonesome?

'There's no way...she never acted that way around me. She's always so cheerful, and never complains, as if she's never had a single care in the world. I never imagined that she'd been suffering so much...'

The scent of her tears lingered in his mind.

'I wonder how much she's suffering now...'

And stranger than your sympathy
And all these thoughts you stole from me
And I'm not sure where I belong
And no where's home and no more wrong

Inuyasha lifted his head as he layed down on his bed, resting his head on his pillow. His thoughts continued to trace back to the image of a lonely and sad image of a person he thought was the most kind in the world.

And I was in love with things
I tried to make you believe I was
And I wouldn't be the one to kneel
Before the dreams I wanted

And all the dark and all the lies
Were all the empty things disguised as me

Stranger than your sympathy...
Stranger than your sympathy...

Okay...I'm not exactly sure if this is classified as a "shortie," but it was the best that I could come up with. This was Inuyasha's point of view. You'll see someone else's next time. Wait till then, okay?