InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ You Are Not Alone ❯ A Girl's Heart ( Chapter 12 )

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Kagome ran home up the stairs and into her room, plopping down on the bed and snuggling her head deeply into the pillow, sobbing into it.

She couldn't understand why this bothered her so much. She kept asking herself all kinds of questions of which she had no idea in the world of how to answer. How come Inuyasha was dating someone like Miss Ikijigoku? Why did he call her "just a girl?" And why did she kiss him and he didn't oppose it one bit?

The girl couldn't explain it, but it just hurt her so bad, her emotional pain seemed to have all of the possible answers she would need at the moment. But she wondered something else:

Why is she feeling like this? About just a student of her's and his ex-girlfriend, who was so obsessed with having things her way?

Kagome didn't want to think about it anymore. She only closed her tear-flodded eyes and gripped her pillow, falling asleep and hoping the entire situation was just a bad dream.

The early morning sunlight filtered through Kagome's windows and rested on her face, waking her. She brought a hand up to rub her sleepy eyes, which were a little crusty from her dried tears. She did not realize this, however; she had temporarily forgotten the dilemma she had previously felt at hand.

Kagome drowsily got up from her bed and walked over to the window, looking out at the sunrise, which set the east horizon aflame with a glowing pinkish orange. She opened her window and laid her head down on the windowsill. She let the fresh, cool morning breeze sweep her cheeks, calming her senses.

Kagome felt so at peace, and yet something about the sunrise began to make her wonder.

The way the sky seemed to explode in bright gold and in white clouds, it reminded her of Inuyasha's polished amber eyes. Those eyes always caught her attention; she always felt there were deep secrets that hid within them.

Also, the way the narrow white clouds skated across the sky reminded Kagome of Inuyasha's long and flowing silver hair. It made him look frighteningly tough, yet so breathtakingly beautiful.

Kagome broke from her bind, shaking her head as she looked over at the mirror, questioning herself. She wondered why she thought so much of him.

I am movin' through the crowd
Tryin' to find myself
Feel like a guitar that's never played
Will someone strum away?

Of course, Inuyasha was a very dear friend of Kagome's; not just a student. Her thoughts of him had grown extensively during their time together. His company was comforting and their conversations would last so long, and they wouldn't be about schoolwork.

And I ask myself
Who do I wanna be?
Do I wanna throw away the key
And invent a whole new me?
And I tell myself

It made her want to laugh every time he overexaggerated about how much his brother bugged him, or how afraid he would be if he would have to "have a stern talk" with his father. He says that his father never touches him, but the ferocity in his voice and eyes would be just as scary. And she would fall apart with giggles whenever he would eat and there would be so much food all over his face. He would also make that absolutely adorable puppy dog face whenever he wanted more of the sweets that she made. It made her want to laugh and cry at the same time.

No one...
No one, don't wanna be
No one...
But me.

The stories he always told were so interesting to her ears. Like one story he told when he was still a young boy and managed to beat all of the neighborhood kids in a footrace because he saw a large bowl of ramen at the concession table near the finish line. And another story how he visited his relatives' farm in the country and chased a big rooster around the yard because it stole his favorite piece of candy. He managed to get it back, but then the rooster began to chase him.

She'd imagine those tales and play them back over and over in her head, laughing to herself.

You were movin' through the crowd
Tryin' to find yourself
Feelin' like a doll left on a shelf
Will someone take you down?

But no matter how much he told her, Kagome would get a strange feeling that there was still more about him. There was a certain air around him that forbid Kagome to learn more about him. There are other things that he never mentions, like his greatest dreams and fears. And even though she heard him speak of his family, ne never once told her about his mother. She had noticed not so long ago, but never asked him, because she had figured it must not have been too comfortable for him.

And you ask yourself...
Who do I wanna be?
Do I wanna throw away the key,
And invent a whole new me?
Gotta tell yourself

No one...
No one, don't wanna be
No one...
But me.

Kagome stopped. She stopped and thought. Why was she thinking about him so much all of the time? How could one single boy have such a powerful impact on her life? He was the first thing to come to mind when she would wake up, and the last thing she would think before she fell asleep. It seemed now that the most powerful thought she could ever have was his name.

Your life plays out on the shadows of the wall
You turn the light on to erase it all
You wonder what it's like to not feel worthless
So open all the blinds and all the curtains

She gripped the lavender jewel around her neck as her confusion grew. What was this boy doing to her? It was as if he held her very heart and mind in the palm of his hand.

Her feet suddenly headed toward the door and ran downstairs, where she found her mother doing the laundry. The woman looked over her shoulder to see her daughter, and smiled warmly at her.

The pain began to return to Kagome. And new pain was rising. It felt so good, but so awful altogether. She couldn't help it.

"Mama!!" she cried as she ran at full speed towards her mother. She dropped the laundry basket as she held her child, who was sobbing into her apron.

No one...
No one, don't wanna be
No one...
But me.

We we're movin' through the crowd...

Okay, once again, this wasn't really as short as I had planned. But it came out about the way I wanted it to, I guess. I hope you enjoyed it. And please look forward to the next chapter.