InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Your Pleasure, My Pain ❯ Inuyasha's Realization of his "True Love" ( Chapter 20 )

Chapter 20: Inuyasha's Realization of his “True Love”

 

When everyone was asleep Inuyasha lie awake gazing at Kagome while she slept. The baby was not crying right now, Sango was not slapping or yelling at Miroku for him trying to invite her into his bed, and Shippo was not begging Inuyasha to let him sleep with him. It was a perfect night.

 

Despite the breath taking image of his beautiful mate and mother of his child lying next to him, Inuyasha's mind was wrapped up in the thought of Kikyo. He had been thinking about her a lot lately. It was not that Kagome reminded him of Kikyo, because she did not, surprisingly; it was merely a part in his life that he felt needed an answer.

 

What is this strange feeling for Kikyo? Inuyasha wondered. I know I can't still be in love with her. We've been apart for years, I've met and fell madly in love with Kagome, and now I have a child. I know that I'll always protect Kikyo; she was my first friend and my first love. Maybe what I'm feeling is just simply affection for her, Inuyasha thought.

 

At least I hope it's just affection….. That second Inuyasha got a whiff of Kikyo's scent. What! That can't be Kikyo! I must be imaging things. But the scent came back and it lingered. She's outside this hut! Inuyasha quietly got up and walked outside. Standing under a cherry blossom tree stood Kikyo. Inuyasha's heart leaped. Oh no, he thought in horror as he remembered the night he had tried to make love to Kikyo.

 

“Kikyo, what, what are you doing here?” He asked quietly.

“Inuyasha, I have merely come for an end,” Kikyo replied. He was confused.

“What do you mean an end to what?”

“An end to this question that lay in my heart, I want it to end. I must have closure to this relationship of mine and yours,” she replied stepping close to him. Kikyo was close as if she was going to embrace him. Inuyasha stared at her in terror as he noticed her eyes were glazed with a tender passion.

 

Kikyo stepped closer and embrace Inuyasha.

“Kikyo….. Kikyo, you know I will always protect you,” he said, “but I can not do this,” he continued while pulling away from her strong embrace.

“Inuyasha, you have never rejected my embrace before, and it has been so long since I have seen you last,” Kikyo said.

 

“Kikyo, you don't know this yet, but Kagome is my mate. I have a newly born son too,” Inuyasha informed. Kikyo looked down at the ground.

“Oh, I see. So I guess I don't need to ask you what I have come to ask,” she said.

“Well, what did you want to ask me?”

“I was going to ask you if you still….. If, if….” She could not get the words out; her eyes were swelling with tears. When Inuyasha saw this he felt his heart hurt and a lump in his throat.

“Kikyo….” He said, trying not to cry.

 

“I was going to ask you if you still loved me,” she quickly blurted out. “But now it is futile to ask such things, now that I know you have a lover and a child.”

“Kikyo…..” Inuyasha managed to say despite the painful knot in his throat. He embraced her and kissed her cheek. Kikyo shoved him away.

“Kikyo, what's, what's wrong?” He sobbed.

“Inuyasha, you don't love me so stop. All you're doing is hurting me. Don't confuse me like this,” she said a little angry.

 

“Kikyo, I know I made Kagome my mate, but it was a mistake. Ever since that day I made her my mate, I had been thinking about you more and more. I tried to block it out but it got to the point where I couldn't. I didn't know what it meant, but it's clear now. Kikyo, I still love you. Even though you went through fifty years in hell hating me, and I felt bitterness towards you, I never once regretted loving you. Even the moment that you pinned me to the tree I still felt love in my heart for you. I went under dormant feeling blessed that I had fallen in love with a woman as great as you.”

 

“You're lying,” she said.

“No Kikyo, I'm not just saying this because I feel bad. I feel bad for Kagome. She means so much to me, but I just don't love her like I lover you and I never will. No one can ever take your place. She may be your reincarnation but she's not you, and I love you. I'm not going to abandon her or my son. I still will see them, but I won't love Kagome any longer.”

Kikyo smiled and Inuyasha brushed away her tears with his finger.

 

“Kikyo, I'll become human and follow you to hell when we die. Kikyo… Will you be my wife?” Inuyasha asked.

“Yes, I will.”

 

They embraced but they did not kiss because Inuyasha was still bound to Kagome.

“Inuyasha, I must go now. Come to the God tree, there I will await you,” Kikyo said as she took off. Inuyasha quietly returned to the hut. Kagome was rocking the baby back to sleep.

“Where the hell did you go? He woke up like five times,” Kagome informed.

“I went for a walk. I'm sorry.” Kagome lifted an eyebrow. Inuyasha looked dreadfully sorry as if he had committed murder or something. Why does he look like that? Kagome thought.